I find everybody in DV interesting. Then I look at myself, look at my life, look at the way I'm expressing myself, I'm a really, really boring person. Anything that I'm interested in can bore someone out if I start talking about it, even if I don't bore them with the topic, I bore them with my seriousness when I speak, so I don't talk about my interests. But I don't like causal talks, I find it pointless, and thus I don't really talk to people I don't know well. I think I'm starting to appear aloft at work. It feels like the image I'm intentionally showing though. What do you want me to talk about if I'm not interested in the jokes you crack? Damn, then I think I have a crash on this girl at work and I get fucking jealous whenever anyone gets close to her (regardless of their genders). So I shun away from her and I don't talk much to her any more like we used to because she seemed to be having so much more fun with other people. So now I have no idea who I like any more. Maybe I should just avoid going home with my colleagues (stupid tradition in company where everybody waits for each other before they go home) so I can read my book when I'm alone on the train. Maybe that will calm me down. K thx bye.
5/4/2013 4:34 AM
Hey, if there's one thing I learned when comparing myself to others, is that the more I believe I'm "boring" or "not interesting" to other people, the subconscious is going to make it so. I know it's more complex than that, but the more you think you're boring around people, the more you visualize yourself being apathetic towards people, and them not seeing much out of you. You start making gestures and body language that's not appealing to most without you even realizing. It starts becoming a program, and it's hard to get out of, which is why they say old habits die hard.
But you can change that if you do things like self-hypnosis (which is pretty much the only practical way on how we really change in life very quickly), because the more you distract the critical factor in your mind (the part that starts comparing information coming in with currently accepted beliefs systems and such), the easier it is to be in a suggestive state to where you start believing yourself to be an interesting person. You're not a boring person at all, and it's probably because not many people don't give enough feedback on how they see you.
Personal example. I thought being friend-zoned by women sucked, but then I realized I was the one doing it because I liked taking advantage of the fact that they would do me favors out of liking me (boy did they go far...). It was easier to communicate to people that way, and the more you ask favors for others, knowing they'll do it because they like you in some way, and the more you become confident in yourself, then you'll start seeing that people notice you more. But yeah, if you don't like those people in your life, maybe you should find other people you like, and start thinking that you're awesome, because the more you do it, and the more you make it in a "present tense" form, your subconscious and other aspects of your mind are going to do their magic on you.
This is why things like lucid dreaming is much easier for me now. There's no enemy other than myself, it's a battle of programming yourself to traits that you want, and knowing how to tap into the subconscious so it gives you want you want.
And as for the girl, yeah, if you think you're boring, what makes you think you'll start liking her? Sure, you might like her temporarily and have intense feelings for her, but what will you do when you start thinking
"Shit, what do I talk about to her now? I don't want to bore her! Aghasdgk!@# I'm so pathetic" You're just a wreck waiting to happen if you don't change yourself.
Damn. I shouldn't have spend so much time self-pitying. I got so much to do. I'm the same poster as before, that's if nobody posts above me. Wait... Who's me?
5/4/2013 4:37 AM
I am not wearing pants.
5/6/2013 3:43 PM
I'm only wearing my underwear right now. No shirt either.
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