Mezzanine

11/28/2009

Hotel Bathroom

I'm in a hotel room with some nondescript dream friends when they all get the idea that it's time to go to Islands of Adventure in Orlando, FL. They all start getting ready and I tell them that I'm already ready. Then at the last minute I decide that if I'm going out, I'd better shave my legs. So I go into the bathroom to actually *go* to the bathroom and I end up standing up while I'm still peeing and getting it on my foot. Then I look at the floor to see that the toilet is leaking and there is water all over the floor by the toilet and the sink and the bathtub. I must have told someone to call the front desk because someone in a french maid outfit comes in to inspect the leak. At this point, I'm in the *other* bathtub standing up shaving my legs. (In my hotel bathroom dreams, they are usually huge with multiple fixtures like this.) I'm completely naked, but I don't care that the maid is seeing my goodies. I may even be showing off a little. Then someone yells that they're leaving and I'm so mad that they're going without me.

Professor Training

I'm at a university somewhere and I'm talking to my Spanish professor, Dr. Sims. He's an older man with thinning grey hair and a not so small nose and glasses. I tell him I'm on my way to my office which is in this building over here, and I point it out to him. He made a joke about something the building and we part ways and I walk to my "office." I open the door to my office and it's a huge lecture hall with kids in it and a professor conducting a class. The professor looks my age.

I walk in and look for my name on the walls above the sections of students and find it and go up to the top level of the lecture hall. I walk across a row of people and sit down to find that Dr. Sims is right behind me. We start talking, but I don't know what about. Then the professor who is teaching is explaining something about the three "C's" of something and then she dismisses class. I walk down and out of the room and find myself attending a seminar for new professors. I sit with a group of people who I've just met and one guy gets up and leaves. He comes back and presents me with a nice Cross pen and says I'm his new best friend. Then someone mentions that we have to take a physical education class "so we can be healthier than and look better than the students." I see my friend Jesse and he says he has to take some class for phys ed that he doesn't like, and I said, "what about golf? you love golf!" and he looks up and says, "yeah, I do!" then the crowd begins to disperse.

10/14/2009

Makin' Out with Crazy Beth

All I remember is that I was making out with a girl we used to call Crazy Beth. I was kissing all over her naked body, especially her stomach. Then I pulled myself away and I noticed that I had been making out with a life size magazine page of her. I turned around and she was standing on the stairs. I vaguely remember having a fight with her and she said she was leaving. So weird!

Grocery Store Theft

I'm in a grocery store and I stole something. I just walked right out of the store with it. I have no idea what it was that I stole. I went to my car in the parking lot to find that it was running and my mom and my sister were in the car waiting for me. I guess they were my getaway.

Sorority Halloween Pranks

This was really long but I don't remember much of it. I'm in college. On campus. Everyone walking around is in Halloween costumes. I'm looking over a fence at some people when my hairdresser friend Katie walks up with her husband Greg. Then I'm blowing kisses at some girls who are walking my way. The next thing I know I'm looking for some kid who's yelling that it's too bad he couldn't get to the other end of the park (I'm in an amusement park now apparently) because he didn't have enough money to pay for the ticket. He's making a big fuss about it. While I'm looking for him on this windy trail things get turned literally upside down. It was so weird I can't even explain it. Then some kid comes out of nowhere and blows dust in my face. I chase him and tell him that's not cool to do to unsuspecting people. I gave him a list of fraternity brothers I knew to prank instead.

I'm mad I didn't realize I was dreaming and try to perform the TOTM.

Sex in Cracker Barrel

I'm in Cracker Barrel. In the entrance part where all the junk that they sell is. I'm on a bed. Doing Andrea. Like it's no big deal and we do it there all the time.

Running Around the School

I was in a classroom at a school and someone was packing some clothes or something. I see a black DC hat and a pair of black DC shoes. I steal them!! I ran out of the building and show them off to some people outside. I decide to go in and get some more shoes.

I'm looking for the classroom I was in and this school is like four stories high and crazy confusing with hallways all over like a maze. I go to an elevator and this guy follows me in. He's got a speech impediment. He asks me where the student housing office is. We stop at a floor that is all dorm rooms. I ask him is he sure he wants to live in a dorm? He should get an apartment. We stop at another floor and I follow him out of the elevator still talking. He goes into this theater and I follow him in and sit down next to him. What's playing looks like Rules of Attraction, even though I've never seen it IRL. I tell the guy that I didn't know we were going to a movie and that I had stuff to do and I had to leave, but could he give me his number so I could call him and check up on how his apartment search was going. On the paper that he gave me his number he had written down three apartments he wanted to look at and asked if I could go look at them with him tomorrow. I have no idea how he found this apartment information in the time from when we got off the elevator to now. So I say sure and see that on the paper his name is David.

I sit for a while in my seat and there's a commercial on about this powder foundation like Bare Minerals stuff and all of a sudden I have it in my lap. It's in a compact and I open it up and try some on. It looks horrible on me, all chalky and just bad, like you can tell I just put makeup on. Not natural at all. ew.

So I look around, and even though this is bad makeup, I decide to steal it. I walk out of the theater and an alarm went off, but there are students walking in and out and no one cares that it's me that set off the alarm. I look around for security cameras. I think, awesome, I got away with it. I'm walking around now looking for that classroom again. It's a chemistry classroom that I'm trying to find.

I have this makeup compact in my hands and I decide I better put it in my back pocket. So now, all of a sudden, they're onto me that I've stolen this makeup! I start running. everywhere. And take breaks between running and just briskly walking. Tons of hallways, a suspended catwalk, and nowhere I need to go to find this classroom. Students everywhere but no one but the people chasing me are paying attention to what's going on.

I find a bathroom to hide in. This bathroom is more like a fitting room in a department store. There's a bench seat and no toilet. I sit on the bench and pull my feet up so no one can see under the stall that I'm there. Then, it's like my stall is a breezeway and there's like a classroom behind me that I can't see and people are coming into and out of my stall!!! But the people chasing me don't find me. I find a door behind me and go in and there's the toilet. But it's a fucked up toilet with two toilet bowls one above the other and I have no idea how to go to the bathroom there. So I look in the mirror at how bad this makeup is on me and try to rub my hands on my face to take it off. Then the janitors come in and I have no idea what happened after that. I was stressed out.

Chaos at Work

I'm at work. I'm usually a cashier, but now I'm running around helping people get their textbooks. I have a list from someone and I'm standing in line a the textbook counter waiting to give them my list and get this person's books when there are two guys playing with a tennis ball like throwing it back and forth to each other. I get out of line to yell at them and lose my place in line and freak out because I've been standing there for so long. Then two people walk up to me and hand me this guy's books. There are way too many books for me to carry, so I make them do it.

OMG Last night was loooooong. Well... I *did* sleep for fourteen hours.

First... I was in church. I had something to confess apparently.

Babe's

Next thing I know, I'm at the local lesbian bar, which I haven't been to in a year. Audrey was working there again, even though I haven't seen her in about six months, either, and she now works at Richbrau. I was sitting at a table and I asked Andrea what she wanted and she said nothing and I asked Jen what she wanted and she said to get her some fries. I go to the bar and ask Audrey for some fries and she has them all ready for me... sort of... she hands me like a flat wire basket that was separated into different sections that was only about half-full of french fries. I didn't question it and she was really happy to give me what I asked for. So I brought them back to the table, but Jen and Andrea were already paying their tabs. I noticed that Andrea's tab was for 2 Chai Lattes and was $6. I don't recall her ever drinking them.

College Campus Sorority Girls

Now I'm walking around a school campus. It was kind of a mix between ODU and William and Mary. There were sidewalks winding through some nice trees and there were students hanging out in little groups and I noticed a really cool looking tree with a pink boombox in its branches. I walked past it but was kind of confused as to why that was there. I was on my way to class when this girl called my name and asked me to come meet someone. It turns out that she was rushing my sorority and we turned her down. She introduced me to some other girl and then all of a sudden there was another group of girls next to us and both groups of girls started doing some sorority song or cheer or something. The girl that called me over and all the other girls in the group I was standing in shouted, "Alpha Phi Omega Pi!!!!" And there is no sorority in existence that had four greek letters. In my dream this didn't bother me. So I excused myself and said I had to get to class. This girl followed me and I get into this house where my class was supposed to be. We were in a stairway and she was behind me and I turned to her and I asked her if she wanted to know why we didn't pick her to pledge our sorority. She just kind of looked interested. I said, "It's because you're too sweet. This sorority is filled with badass bitches. We just didn't think it was a good fit." And she said, "that's why I rushed. I thought I could balance it out." She asked for my phone number so we could hang out anyway and she started to write it on her hand. The pen stopped working and she asked me for the last two numbers like four times. She finally got to write it down.

Room 524

I walked up the stairs to find that the door to the class was open and there was a teacher's desk and a fourposter bed and desks that students were sitting in. There were a lot of people in the hallway, mostly girls who were wearing different greek letters. We were all waiting for this class to end so we could go in. Then the teacher yelled out into the hallway that we could come in and pick up our tests. I was confused because I thought this was the first day of class. Someone told me that they didn't think I could start in the middle of the semester. I looked at the number above the door and I knew I was supposed to be in room 524 which is where I was.

I left the room and walked down the hallway and saw Todd P. walking into another room. I followed him in and said, "Todd, is that you?" He turned around and gave me a big hug and at the same time we both said, "I haven't seen you in forever!!" I asked him how his mom was doing and he said, "she's fine, and my dad is celebrating two years of I don't know what. Everyone can come over and sell their pot." Which I found interesting. Then in the room on a tv there was a video playing of a weiner dog in a slinky.

House Fire and Flood

Next thing I know I'm at my parents house. I'm in the kitchen and I walk into the living room to find that Andrea's couch is there now and the end of it is facing the fireplace and the other couch is against the wall. How everything fit in there and I still had room to walk was amazing. I look at her couch and behind it I notice that some stuff from the fireplace had jumped out and was now burning her couch!! I ran to the kitchen to get some water to put in a glass to put the fire out. The fire was burning along the hearth on the carpet and it was also underneath the couch. I could see it glowing through the couch cushions. So I kept going back and forth from the kitchen to the living room with glasses of water trying to put out the fire. Then my mom and dad come downstairs and I'm freaking out telling them the house is on fire!! They sit on the couch like it's no big deal. I asked my mom to help me and asked my dad if he called 911 yet. He said no so I grabbed the phone and walked past him to go to my room upstairs. On the way past him I whacked him in the face with a newspaper and said, "That's what you get for leaving the fire going and going to bed!!" So I went to my room to call 911 and find out that it's my sister taking the call. I look out my bedroom window to see that next door we now have apartment buildings. And everything is flooded up to the second level of them. I looked out the other window and at the entrance to the neighborhood is all this construction. And big tour busses and ambulances are flying out of the neighborhood ignoring the stop signs. I was concerned that they were going to cause an accident and also that with all this going on, how could the firetrucks get in??

Next thing I know, I'm outside in the flood. Forget about my parents inside, they probably drowned anyway. There are lots of school busses outside underwater with kids in them. I'm underwater now trying to swim to the surface. I get to the surface and I'm on top of a school bus that is now on its side floating in the water and I can see all the kids inside. I walk to the front where the driver is and then the bus lifts out of the water and is flying now. It is a helicopter-bus and I'm hanging on the the driver's window yelling inside that "you better not drop me!!" because if I fall I will fall through the helicopter's propellers. I fell off the bus and woke up and immediately wrote all this down so I'd remember. This was the first time that I didn't just try to remember in the morning when I woke up. This was at about 430am.

Gerbil Theater

Now I'm in a theater and there's a stage production going on. It looks pretty boring, so I turn to leave. On my way out I see Stephanie so I walk back inside with her and have a seat. In my shirt I have smuggled in a hamster. I take him out to show Stephanie and then they guys nest to us take out their puppy. And to the right of us down the row someone has a rabbit and someone else has another animal further down the row. I glance up at the stage and it's now a movie. There are gerbils in a fire. There's just like a boyscout fire pit with tree branches and rocks around the outside to contain it. These gerbils are in the fire and it is not burning them. So this rabbit comes over to my seat and the girl down the row asks for him back so I go to pass the rabbit to her and the rabbit goes between the seats and comes out the other side. I take my hamster and leave the theater.

Now I don't have my hamster anymore, I have a puppy. I'm walking the puppy in a courtyard and it's really nice weather outside. Andrea's with me. We encounter this lady walking her dog around a corner. The leashes get tangled up and when we untangle them, she asks Andrea what she should use to straighten her hair. Typical. Andrea knows everything about all the beauty products. The puppy gets away and I chase after him. He ends up in an elevator so I dive into the elevator before the doors can close and scoop the puppy up into my arms. I'm trying to remember what floor I was on so I can get back to Andrea.

I also recall my dad being really mad at me for something and he slapped me. Oh yeah... I was at the mailbox mailing some packages and the mail lady came by and said that one of them had to go UPS. I looked on the side of the box and sure enough it said UPPS, not USPS. So I went in and told my dad and he got mad and slapped me. That bastard.

12/28/2009 Saturday night/ Sunday morning

I'm at school. I know I'm in college for some reason. I'm at work, but on a break. I'm in a building looking at different art exhibits. It's student art and I'm looking at students actually painting stuff. It's kind of like a science fair. I feel like I was judging these exhibits. I looked at and immediately hated the first thing I saw and I don't even know what the art looked like. It just rubbed me the wrong way. The next exhibit wasn't that good, either. I was talking to the guy who was painting. I went to another room and saw this girl painting and whatever she was doing was spectacular. I just wanted to stay there and talk with her about art like all day. Then the guy who I was just talking to and wasn't impressed with came in. I was kind of upset that he was there. I wanted him to leave.

Last night was a real rollercoaster. At first I had a really choppy dream where a lot happened that didn't really go together. Now... I can't remember it. I might later on today. I think maybe everything else that happened after that pushed it out of my memory.

I was trying to register for a class for school in a little office where there were two desks with receptionists. We were looking online at something, then I asked if I could get online for something while the one lady went out to lunch or something. The other lady had a cat on her shoulder, well, a kitten, really. The kitten jumped off her shoulder and onto the floor. That's when I realized that there were kittens all over the room! All different colors. The room was kind of dark. I go to the computer to look up whatever and the mouse was going so slow. It was unbearable. Then there was another monitor under the one I was looking at with something else on it. It was the roster for the class I had just picked out. This girl I didn't like in high school's name was on the list for my class. I remember thinking, oh that's just great.

Now I'm at my parents' house. My sister is there and I'm furious at her. She's wearing my shirt. All these thought are going through my mind: I don't even like her. Why is she wearing my shirt? Why won't she just shut the hell up? What the hell is her problem? She's like a mental patient. (All things I think about her IRL.) So I sit her down at the dining room table to talk about why she's wearing my shirt. And my mom sits at the head of the table to I guess watch. Every time I start to talk, my sister starts to talk back. I'm trying to explain to her that I don't think that it's right that she wear my shirt because I wouldn't just put her clothes on without asking, not that I would even go to her house because I don't like her. SO she keeps interrupting me and I look to my mom for help and she's no help because she almost always sticks up for her. So, I go into the kitchen and grab a pair of scissors. I go to my sister and tell her that if she doesn't take off my shirt, I'm going to cut off her hair. And I hold the scissors up to some of her hair to prove my point. I am frantically yelling at this point as loud as I can yell. And she makes a move finally to take off my shirt and my mom has brought her a tank top to put on instead. Now my dad's in the dining room wondering what all the fuss is about. I think I started yelling at him, too, for being a pothead. I ran up to my room for whatever reason, probably just to get out of the room with all the tension. My dad comes up and into my room and I yell at him for not knocking.

I go back downstairs and I'm getting into a truck with my dad, my sister's ex boyfriend, and almost my mom. My dad's pulling out and I'm telling him he can't leave mom!! So she's running out of the house to get in the truck. She gets into the back seat with me. We're driving now to a neighborhood that is still under construction. My dad pulls the truck up to a house that's semi-built, like it has walls and stuff, but not much else. He starts bringing in these industrial sized paint cans into the garage. Immediately I know they're filled with pot and he's up to something. Then, he pulls away and on the way out of the neighborhood, I see this other house and I guess I can see inside it and there's this boy's body underneath like a pallet that stuff comes on when it's shipped to a store so the forklift can pick it up. I'm wondering why no one else sees this and ask what he's doing there. My sister's ex boyfriend has now turned into my dad's friend Scott and he says that the boy in the house was killed a few days ago. And that was that. I was thinking we need to call someone or do something but no one wants to talk about it.

We went to the bank. On the way back, we park kind of far away from the house we were at. House isn't even the word, this was a neighborhood of huge mansions. SO as we're getting out of the truck, my dad hands me a check and a hundred dollars cash. I'm holding it in my hand as we're walking and this guy comes up behind me, puts a gun to my head, and tells me he's robbing me. He didn't say to give him what I had in my hand, but I was scared to death. Then he comes in front of me and says it was just a joke he plays on mew neighbors. He has a dog with him. Big dog, like a Malamute. He follows us up to the house. My mom, dad, and Scott go in. I'm standing talking to the guy. The dog is trying to get in, but I tell him that we have small dogs in there and big dogs scare them. SO I close the door and we talk outside on the unfinished front of the house. I notice my lips are the most chapped lips could ever be. They feel like paper. I'm telling the guy that I've tried everything to fix this. He asks me how we came to live here, and I told him mom and dad sold their house and thought it was time for a bigger one. I'm thinking I hope he buys this because no one's selling houses in this economy and I have to cover for them or they're busted. SO he nonchalantly tells me that this is his house and he owns like twenty houses in this development. Then a worker from a house across the way comes up and puts ipod headphones on the guy. He excuses himself and goes to talk to a contractor or something. He calls for his dog, and her name is Annabelle.

I take this opportunity to run in the house and tell everyone to get out, the jig is up, it's that guy's house. So everyone comes out and the guy is back. I wish I could remember what he looked like. I think like the James Bond from Casino Royale. Sort of. Now the guy is all friendly, not like he wasn't before, but he's like trying to be friends with us. I really want him to come up in more dreams so I can interact with him more. Maybe he's like the dad I never had or something.