non-lucid

I have been completely swamped for the past few days, but I've still been trying to remember my dreams and smoke less before going to bed. So here's what I got from the last four nights.

Feb. 18

I want to say that I took 50 mg of zinc a few hours before bed and 10 mg of melatonin at bedtime for this. I think it was this night....

Almost Like A Lucid.... [Non-Lucid]

This dream was long and I don't remember a lot of the build up to it, but I do recall that around when my memory comes in I had the perception that I was viewing something that had happened earlier in the dream again from a different perspective, like I had gone back in time to watch it. I'm not sure if this event had actually happened earlier or not, but it sure felt like it did. I was standing in front of a building in some downtown area watching a crowd of people walk through the front doors, and among them was the past me. I also saw this girl walking not too far from me and decided to possess her, but she got into the building before I could get up to her. I easily rewound time and caught her before she went in again and entered her body. Then I just kept walking into the building to see what all the fuss was about. The inside looked just like some kind of mini-mart like a 7-Eleven but maybe just a little bit fancier. As I walked around I started thinking about some imaginary superhero story I was apparently making, specifically in relation to the villain. I had an idea about how to start them out with something like mind reading or telepathy and move it up to body possession through some kind of power increase, but I can't remember exactly what it was now. At that point the dream became a little less vivid and I shot forward through the wall (smoothly phased) and started flying over the field I was next to, since this place was now a stop on a highway out in the middle of nowhere, and as I was admiring it I woke up.

Feb. 19

I'm fairly certain I took a 10 mg melatonin here, too.

#1 - I'm Sure He Can Handle It [Non-Lucid]

I was hanging out with my friend N when we somehow became aware of the fact that our mutual friend R (who I met N through) had been taken hostage somewhere. We were in a house that I believe somewhat resembles my aunt and uncles' old house from like fifteen years ago, but I barely remember it. I decided to call his cell phone to see if he could pick up, but his voice message had been changed to some guy with a really heavy British accent talking about how we had reached some kind of game development company or something. I tell N that he must have been taken hostage by British criminals who had changed his message so that they could pretend to be a legit company and no one would know to save him, and that we have to go rescue him right away, but added that "I still have a class to go to today. " I turned my head and saw a TV with a commercial playing in the corner of the room. The audio to it was talking about something along the lines of making your own robot, but all the video was showing was a guy wrapping himself in plastic and trying to mold it to make armor out of it. I instantly feel that R might've seen this commercial too and had the same idea, and so he may already have been able to escape on his own.

#2 - Lucid Dreaming Tutorial [Non-Lucid]

The main thing I remember about this dream is walking around the park by my house with my mom and coming across these kids, like three or four boys around eight to ten years old if I remember correctly. They asked me how to fly in a lucid dream so I showed them, though I did something totally different than I actually do in a lucid (which this was not), which was like this multiple jumping thing kind of like in a Mario game. Despite thinking that this was my normal routine, I could tell that it felt really odd as I was doing it, though I didn't know why. However, I still did manage to fly, but they didn't quite understand my method. I just told them I'd see them again some time and teach them more later on, because I guess I was busy at the moment.

#3 - Dream Fragment [Non-Lucid]

I was giving someone recommendations and tips about which Nippon Ichi Software game to play.

Feb. 20

Poor Judgment Calls [Non-Lucid]

I didn't actually write this one down, so my memory of it is kind of faint now. Basically what I remember is that first I was at my house with my cousin K, then something involving Marona from Phantom Brave happened (I think she might have been my cousin at first that turned into her?), and then I was with JB, this guy I used to hang out with who was pretty sociopathic. We were in my room and my parents kept bothering us, and we were trying to get them to leave us alone so we could have sex (eep ). We never got them to go away before I woke up, though.

Feb. 21

#1 - I Wonder What It Was.... [Non-Lucid]

The part of this dream before my recall really kicks in was at a store, but that's about all I can remember about it. What I do remember is being at a family party at my house, and everyone was gathered in the living room to congratulate this guy I don't recognize for doing something.... I'm not sure what it was, but I know that I felt that either I deserved it or at least he didn't deserve it, or something along those lines. I was being sort of rude and went to the kitchen to sulk alone because I couldn't stand to be in the room for all that, but at one point the guy came in and tried to make me feel better and I started just trying to get over it. My cousin A walked in and started saying something about these bowls of grapes and cherry tomatoes that were sitting on the counter by me and managed to squeeze some open and wear them on the tips of her fingers just to be funny, and then they sort of just absorbed into her fingertips and disappeared and she left. >___> I turned around and my friend M's mom was there too, for some reason (it didn't even look like her, I just perceived that that's who she was). She started telling me about where she grew up, but I don't recall anything she was saying. The dream sort of shifted as it was falling apart, and I got a third-person flash of a Facebook page where someone was telling this girl A that I met recently that she was beautiful and an inspiration to everyone, and then I woke up.

#2 - If Only This Worked In Real Life [Non-Lucid]

I was driving around with some random guy and Linkzelda, and I was trying to show the guy how to get to our imaginary school campus by following Link's directions. At one point we parked and me and the random guy got out of the car at this apartment complex, and this guy who I somehow immediately knew was Jewish came up to us begging for help. He had a gun and said he had run out of bullets for it and was being chased by a group of people, and there was some situation with more guns in an apartment upstairs. The guy that we were showing the campus decided to be a hero and ran off to that upstairs place, and the Jewish guy ran off frightened as he saw the group of people coming after him again. At that moment I realized that they might see me if I'm not careful, so I started whispering to myself "I'm not here, I'm not here...." and getting into a meditative state. I dropped the perception of my body and started floating up away from the scene, but then I looked down at one of the guys running by and got sucked into his body. The dream jumped around a little and I was in some hazy perception of something about a guy and some really attractive woman with guns, but it's so blurry that I can't really recall what was going on now.... And that's the last thing that happened before I woke up.

Final thoughts.... I'm noticing a definite increase in the amount of dream control techniques I employ in non-lucids these days. And it's not just from the examples shown here, it's been happening more and more lately. I wonder if it's because of the way I try to drop awareness in lucids anyway and just run with it; maybe I simply recognize the similar state of mind and use it without acknowledging what it implies?

I'm just playing catch-up here a little bit. These are the dreams I have recorded from the past couple of weeks that I haven't uploaded yet.

#1 - Hmm [Non-Lucid]

I was in a bed in a dark room with A, this girl that I know through some friends that one of them has a crush on, and T, a different friend's old roommate. T wasn't very involved, I could just hear him moving around. I was giving A a full-body massage. Afterwards we all got up and walked to a classroom, which was just down the hall from the room we were in. Hmm.

#2 - Kenny Dies [DILD]

Most of this dream is blurry in my memory now, but I remember it starting with me, my old friend D, and Kenny from South Park all being chased by someone. We were going through some obstacle course connected to a mall or something and we were trying to escape from a room that was filling up with water before it was too late. At one point D and I turned around and saw Kenny floating in the water, having drowned. D looked shocked and said "Oh my god, they killed Kenny!" I jumped up and said "You bastards!!" I tried to go after him but D pulled me away, and then my memory gets hazy again.... The next thing I remember is walking outside the mall in the parking lot and becoming lucid. There was some cool pattern in the clouds, but I can't remember what it was now. I decided to walk through the mall and gathered up a crowd of DCs around me all chanting a mantra of stability with me, something like "this dream is long, vivid, and solid". While we were walking around I was also picking up various pieces of furniture in the store effortlessly with one hand and hurling them across the store. I was really worked up and this girl next to me did part of the chant wrong, so I looked over and said "No!" and shoved her headfirst into a glass wall. It didn't break, she just hit it really hard and then fell over. When I saw that it was actually someone I know and like in waking life I felt bad, and I picked her up and sat her down on a chair to see if she was alright. After that I started getting kind of unfocused and the dream ended.

#3 - Too Much Energy [DILD]

The main thing I remember about this dream is that I was pissed when I realized it wasn't real, because it was going really well. I became lucid around the time I was doing all these crazy calculated flips around this huge auditorium that were really fun and impressive as hell, and then when I realized what was going on I just had endless amounts of energy. I got really unfocused and just started grabbing stuff and throwing it all over the place until I woke up.

#4 - Back Once Again [DILD]

I was back at my old middle school with O and we were visiting our old orchestra teacher Mr. L. Afterwards we somehow got lost in the crowd and became part of the student body there, so we started trying to find our English class that we were supposed to head to next. We realized that we needed to pick our schedules first, so we started walking to the office and on the way we saw an old friend of ours wearing this cute sweater that I own that looked totally weird on him. X) We were also on the second floor of the building and I could see a tower of people stacked on top of each other coming up and leaning in our direction from the first floor visible beyond the railing. >_> Around this time I became lucid, and I ran into the girl M in the hallway who I haven't seen at least since we graduated high school but who I knew since kindergarten. I walked up to her and said "Hey, girl." She came up to me and I grabbed her and ripped her shirt down and started groping her and kissing her neck, but I got a little too into it and the dream faded away.

I took 50 mg of zinc at dinner the night that this next dream happened. I like to think that it had an effect.

#5 - More Summoning And Possession Practice [DILD]

There was some weird school stuff going on this dream before my memory really cuts in. The first thing I really recall is becoming lucid while packing up my stuff in a dark room. I wasn't immediately lucid enough to break out of this action at first, so I started repeating a mantra "electricity works in dreams" while I kept trying to turn on the lights and use my cell phone light to help me find stuff. It worked to an extent, and some of the lights showed up or got brighter if they were already on. My cat was also in the room with me but walked out it and down the school hallway at some point. I decided to walk out to the hall myself and followed it down to a large open area in a very fancy hotel-type building. There was also a large window spanning several stores to the left of us that was visible because every floor ended in a balcony. I decided to fly forward and grabbed a sofa with people sitting on it with my right hand as I passed by it, and I phased us through the window. Outside I could see groups of people eating dinner at tables below us, and I chucked the couch at one of them and then just moved on without even really watching what happened. I flew higher up to where there was a rooftop balcony with no covering and saw a family eating dinner or something. I decided that I wanted to see if I could summon a whole group of people, so I flew a ways over to the next rooftop thinking that I wanted to see a small group of gossiping women. When I got there it worked perfectly, there were four women in classy dressed gossiping about something at a table, and they didn't seem to take notice of me. I decided to possess one of them but it didn't go completely smoothly, and the other women started looking at me (as her) and asking if I was alright, I was making weird faces trying to adjust the feeling. I finally started getting situated but then my libido started ramping up and it woke me up. Man, if I could just control that feeling without waking up more often....

That's it for now!

Based on the results of the night before last, I decided to go a little nuts this time. I originally fell asleep on the couch in the living room before waking up a couple hours or so later. I never have any dreams when that happens, guaranteed, but it does usually count as a mini-WBTB since I have to get up and turn off all the lights around the house and everything. Starting from this point on, every time I woke up I smoked weed before going to bed again, so that all three of my dreams were enhanced by it.

#1 - A Day In The Life [Non-Lucid]

This dream is a little patchy in my memory because it was kind of long, but I remember near the beginning I was playing Pokémon White Version, except that it was a Game Boy Pocket game and had the old Red/Blue style of carts (except white-colored) and everything. I think N was there, and I had this little chip that I could stick into the cartridge to unlock some kind of debug mode or early designer version of the game or something like that, but I don't remember much about it other than that it was fun to mess around with. My memory skips forward a little and I remember being in some small diner or something in some huge industrial port town with a ship quickly getting closer in the distance through the window behind me and smoke stacks all around the town. I was talking to this guy who I remember not really trusting, but I can't remember what about. He kept telling me to turn around and look through the window (which is how I saw the ship), and I was hesitant to even turn my back to him but I finally did and noticed that there was some gigantic sort of dragon-like monster destroying everything in the distance. And I remember thinking about something in relation to cigarettes as it was destroying the smoke stacks.... But anyway, I decided to use my super hero powers to fight it! I phased through the wall of the building we were in and flew up in the sky above the city. I can't quite recall what it was now, but after doing some quick thinking I was able to deduce what the monster's weak point was and attacked it with some kind of fiery rocket dive bomb move. It was defeated, and then my memory jumps forward again slightly. I was in a room surrounded by my so-called friends all sitting on barracks and laughing at the fact that somehow during all that I had apparently been stripped of my clothes. I found out that they had been left in that room and while I was away all of my friends had taken them and I didn't know which of them were hiding them, so I decided to use my X-ray vision to see which of them had them and then phased through them to grab them. I then phased myself through the wall into a locked room and started putting the clothes back on. And I think that's about where I woke up.

#2 - There's A First Time For Everything [Non-Lucid]

What came before and after this part of the dream is hazy, but I'm sure this part stands out mainly because of the adrenaline rushes I was getting. >.> I was in a department store with someone else who I can't recall right now, and basically I was in this setup where I was standing at the side of the isles looking inward (where you can see down each one), and beyond the isles there was this big high up balcony visible in the distance where a band was playing. The two of us were being chased by two guys with guns and I decided that I wasn't going to take their shit anymore. I pulled out two pistols myself (which I've never used before, even in dreams) and started unloading on them, but the whole scene was really hectic so we just kept missing each other at first. Finally we got to a point where one of the guys was walking back and forth on the other side of the isles and the other was hiding behind the wall next to the drum player in the band up on the balcony. It took lots of quick thinking and maneuvering, but finally I was able to take out the former, followed closely by the latter as he would peak out to shoot at me. Cue lots of relief, and then I don't really remember much besides being back at high school until I woke up.

#3 - Just Shapes And Patterns [Non-Lucid]

This one is just odd. I believe I was with R, and we were sitting on the floor in my kitchen next to the refrigerator convinced that we were playing some kind of Super Smash Bros. game, when in fact what we were doing was using green markers to draw trajectories, that our characters were meant to be following, through the air. We also had the ability to purchase large structures made out of, like... those white plastic pipe tube things, and we got one that we were calling a "Mario tower" (it looked vaguely like the Eiffel Tower, actually). As I was drawing more green lines around it, it started occurring to me that I should be hearing some kind of Mario music playing in the background, and it just suddenly kicked in. I couldn't help but notice how incredibly bizarre this all was, and that there were suddenly green words floating in the air around our marks. I stared at one, though I can't remember what it said now, and the edges of it started glowing red slightly as it inflated and become closer and closer to me, but then I woke up.

So yeah, that was certainly an interesting night. Lots of fantasy, action, and trippiness. Now that's what I call a success!

Alice In Wonderland Syndrome [Non-Lucid]

There was a huge storm raging all night long, so the thunder (and my cat meowing) woke me up occasionally. At one point in the early morning I was pretty awake but I didn't really want to get up for Christmas yet, so I rolled over to the side of the bed and ended up smoking a little bit of weed. I closed my eyes and then started drift off again. In the past, smoking weed with a WBTB-ish has led to some very trippy experiences with non-lucid hypnagogia, but never actually into a dream or OBE as of yet. (Though I have had it happen at the beginning of the night.) This was the first time I really got this far, and it was pretty interesting.

At first there are many indistinguishable voices and other noises running through the background of my mind. These would persist throughout the entire experience. Suddenly, I was in what appeared to be a dorm room, and I believe I perceived it as mine. I wasn't totally sure what was happening, but I noticed a TV sitting on the floor. On it, there was some video game room that was sliding and turning in a very smooth and rendered fashion, it had a very unreal feeling to it which matched exactly the patterned effects I get when seeing a room heavily distort and shift perspective on a hallucinogen. I began to feel as though I was having an out-of-body experience, even though I was just watching this on TV (and strangely, this isn't the first time TV sensations have transferred to me in a wake-induced dream), and I could even feel myself going into third-person camera mode and leaving my body even though none of this was visually happening. I looked over and there was someone there, though I can't remember who now, next to a tray of used dishes and champagne glasses, and in the glasses there were bees flying around. This seemed mildly odd to me, and I remember talking to the person but I can't remember what was said. I still felt quite bizarre and I turned around to find that my perception of reality was becoming very distorted. I felt as if I was sinking into the room while it was simultaneously sinking into me, if that makes any sense. I also had Alice in Wonderland syndrome, where size proportions are not correct. I felt extremely big and like I was trapped in this now very tiny room, and the voices still playing through my mind were starting to make me paranoid. I vaguely remember thinking that my parents were going to be coming into the room and that I wouldn't be able to face them like this, or something along those lines. Not long after, the whole thing fell apart. I continued hearing voices momentarily as I was waking up, and then when I returned to full consciousness they finally faded away.

Bizarre stuff. I'm starting to wonder if the weed is pushing the dream into really trippy territory in the same way it would enhance the effects of a hallucinogenic drug. And if that's the case, I definitely have some more experimenting to do....

This is from November 21st, I just didn't get around to typing it all up before.

Early in the night I originally fell asleep on the couch in the living room in front of my laptop, then I woke up a couple to a few hours later and shut down everything in the house and moved to bed. So that technically makes these with a WBTB.

#1 - Creeper Nightmare [Non-Lucid]

Throughout this dream, for some reason all of the windows in my house had open blinds and were larger than normal, making it very easy to see into the house from the outside at any point. It was really creeping me out because in the house next to mine which was visible through the windows there were these four guys that kept peering around corners or over fences to just stare at me in a really freaky way, and then they would start laughing when I got anxious. Even when I tried to go out front or out back I would see them watching me from somewhere. At one point I was even crawling around on the floor in the house and reaching strategically over and around objects to avoid being seen by them, knowing that they were just out of eyesight staring into the window. Eventually I just got pissed, and I went out front, walked over to their fence, and jumped up on it in one swift movement. This is not uncommon for me; my dream self seems to think that walking on fences is fairly normal, though still something to be considered significant. I ran along the top until the second floor balcony of the next door house (which doesn't actually exist, it's a one-story house) and leapt over to it. I went in through the door and walked up to one of the guys who said "Oh shit!" and looked shocked. I was ready to smack a ho, but then my memory of the dream gets really blurry and I just remember there being something about my old friend T, I saw him for a second... but then, I woke up. Ah, well.

#2 - Modeling Assignment [Non-Lucid]

I was at some big school function where they paired us up with different students and had us take tests and do modeling jobs and stuff. There was some girl there that I was just trying to be nice to for some reason, and I remember lending her a pencil, but then she still got totally pissed at me for something. However, AB, this girl I used to know since elementary school but barely ever talked to since then, got up and started defending my honor with some long speech. Oh, also, I think for most of this dream, or at least this part onward, I was JY, this guy I also knew since elementary school. No idea why, I haven't thought about him in ages.... Anyway, like I said, we were paired off and we were supposed to be doing a modeling gig. For ours they were expecting us to submit some comic we'd made, but my partner was the one who had it on him and he didn't show up. I tried doing the gig myself and they told me my image was nice but it needed more, it had to be both of us or neither. I decided to go walking around the mall/school looking for my partner and somehow ended up back at my house. (My real house, not JY's house.) I was in my parents' bedroom and I decided to just jump back on the bed and give the guy a phone call. I told him the situation and he said that he had to ditch to go to a dentist appointment. I just said that that was fine because the school was just pushing us into it anyway so I didn't really care that much.

#3 - Nothing Wrong With A Little Bondage [Non-Lucid]

I was at some kind of station waiting for transportation with my parents, and there were these two random girls standing not far from us. I turned to my parents and asked them if the train that just left was the one that we were supposed to be taking, and the girls startled giggling and said that it was actually a bus. I just responded that we call it a train where I come from. It was clearly based on a train from around here, so I wasn't wrong lol. Eventually a couple more arrive and we got on a different one from them and I get a third-person view (from outside and behind the train, though it may have become a bus considering what we did next) of the train swerving through traffic and over all these crazy highways that bend at impossible angles. It basically looked like a huge video game obstacle course set up all around some big city full of skyscrapers. The dream then transitions to when I'm already off the train and I'm at a mall restaurant of some kind meeting up with M, some random DC, O, ET (heh, not the extra terrestrial), S (5 hits, for self-reference), and maybe C and a few others. We were going to do something though I can't remember exactly what now, and this random guy walked up to me and kissed my hand. I just patted him on the back and said "Sorry, I'm taken." and moved on, and I saw a friend comforting him as he walked away. Then, ET just up and decides to grab me by the arms from behind, pick me up, and hold me locked in some bondage position to parade me around the mall for everyone to see. At this point many of the people in the crowd were suddenly in fetishy outfits, and everyone was just staring at me amused as we went by. And yes, it was awesome. >.> I could hear the whole gang talking about movies or something behind me, but I never got back into the conversation before the dream ended. I had a brief false awakening where I typed up most of the previous dream on my phone, almost letting it fade from memory. Luckily, I still remembered it well upon waking for real.

#4 - And Now The Creepers Can Fly ;-; [MILD]

In this dream I felt that I was visiting home for the holidays, though I'm not entirely sure where exactly I would've been visiting from. I was wandering around outside on the side of my house by the next door neighbors' fence and I saw some random girl followed by SC, this girl I knew in middle school, breaking into their yard through the fence. The girl was saying that it's just something she likes to do to mess with people so they have to take the time to clean their yards up. Now this next part I really have no memory of at all, though I really wish I did. Instead, I'll just have to quote it. "Then some old guy comes running by and uses me as an external pacemaker for a second." I go back inside my house through the garage and see the girls sitting out back and think that something must be up because they should still have been in the neighbors' yard. I approach our back door and think to myself "Alright, if I can fly right through it then this is a dream." I leapt off the ground and went right through the door and wall and flew into the sky. I was excited, but immediately after the happiness set in and I turned around slightly and saw some creepy guy flying right behind me. I had an adrenaline rush and the scene transitioned into my bedroom, and I was convinced that I'd ruined my shot. I almost lost this dream to a false awakening as well, but thankfully I woke up shortly afterward.

#1 - Maybe Some Post-Apocalyptic Future? [Non-Lucid]

The first memories of this dream are very patchy. What I remember is that there were lots of these robots that looked like they were designed to be piloted by people for combat. They had the typical dwarfish body with a big round cockpit head design. However, when you actually got inside, through an opening in the top, there was a huge lair inside each one. Some of this dream took place in first person and some in third person, but apparently I was this girl who was just a little bit creepy-looking and sort of lanky, and my face was divided in half with colors so that (I believe) the left side of my face was my normal skin and hair color and the right had pale white skin and light navy blue hair. My hair was also much straighter than it actually is. Though I don't quite remember the experience (though I suppose this whole dream could pretty much count), I also recall taking like eight hits of LSD and almost snorting a line of MDMA, but then I got distracted. The clearest part of my memory comes in when I'm walking around an apartment complex looking for this huge drill vehicle I guess one of my friends was supposed to be at, and when I finally found it I started talking to them (I want to say it was a girl). They were shocked because I had aged more than them, and I explained that it was because I spent so much time in a combat robot lair and time moves faster in there. I think there was a little bit more to that, but... that's about where the vividness fades out, and I wake up.

#2 - Dream Fragment [Non-Lucid]

Something about having a big dinner with my parents and Linkzelda or something like that, I remember seeing them both separately but not really any other details.

#3 - Dream Fragment [Non-Lucid]

My friend N (who is not on DV) and I were arguing against some posts on DV, and all I remember is that the subject was blue and white suits, either for skydiving or skiing, and a claim that you have to do ridiculous things just to be noticed in this world.

#4 - Dream Fragment [Non-Lucid]

Just a direct quote from my notes for this one, it's hard to really remember it now. "Talking to Auron about how DV doesn't cater enough to people who want to improve their bodies through 3D models? Or something like that...." >.>

#5 - Creepy Thoughts [Non-Lucid]

I was visiting S in a house he was renting the top floor of, and I believe he was renting it with a roommate. The house was gigantic and I didn't even really get to see most of it, but I did end up sleeping over either on a cot or in a sleeping bag or something in a room I had to myself. There was a window in the room with a clear view of another house across the street, though with where I felt I was in the house and the size of the house I'm not entirely sure this view made much sense. Regardless, I could see the other house's balcony, and that got me thinking about the fact that if someone was out there I'd be able to see them clearly and they wouldn't notice me at all, and that just made me think about how often people must just people watch us for various reasons that we never even realize. And that's about where the dream ended.

#6 - Fight In The Gym [Non-Lucid]

I was with this guy I used to hang out with, JB, and we were at a school function or something with lots of other people. I want to say we were in a gym with a stage on it, and we were pretty close to the stage at first. Out of nowhere these two guys sort of near us started fighting, and along with the rest of the crowd we got pushed into one of the back corners of the room, and most of us sat down. I was literally there in the corner myself, everyone was packed in pretty tight and there was a guy in front of me and a girl to my right that were wedging me in there. I actually felt completely trapped because they were pushing tight but there was no discomfort of any sort, so it felt really nice. >w< Someone tries to take a couple good pictures of the group after those guys randomly stopped fighting and then ML, this girl I knew in high school, is saying something when her mouth starts growing gigantic and rotating sideways. >_> My memory starts getting a little hazy at this point, and then I wake up.

An Ordinary Dream Day [Non-Lucid]

I'm hanging out with my old friend JE and his brother TE in some random house with a sort of log cabin type of design. For reasons I can't remember now, I realized that I needed to have my car on me and it was all the way back at my house (which was a significant distance away), I guess I hadn't driven there myself but I was supposed to? I asked TE if he could drive me there to get it, and since he would have to drive back as well I told him I would give him triple gas money. That got him to agree, and then my memory skips forward a little bit and I remember us stopping at a gas station so I could an ATM.... After that my memory skips forward much further, though. Now I'm posting on DV and the only other people I remember clearly being a part of the conversation are Dianeva and Linkzelda. I only vaguely remember that the topic of discussion was something about romance and pain, and something that Dianeva said made me nostalgic, but I can't remember what it was now. During that, I woke up.

Nosy Teacher [Non-Lucid]

I was in a high school class with people who I don't really remember now, they might have been imaginary. The teacher was standing right outside the door not really paying attention to the class, I guess we were just waiting for it to end or something? And I was seated on the floor around a few people and we were trying to smoke a bowl of weed without getting caught. The teacher came in and almost caught us but I managed to hide everything from her at the last second and we got away with it. When she went back out I sat in the chair at her desk and started going again, but then she came back in and we decided to call it quits. One of those times, I want to say maybe the second time but I'm not sure, I had to hold in a hit while she was talking to us to let all the smoke disappear. When we finished we moved to a different spot on the floor and my old friend D was there, and apparently I was dating him. I snuggled up next to him and started watching this tiny TV placed up on the ceiling in the opposite corner of the room. I remember him getting my attention and saying something to me about how his parents can't believe I still listen to this old radio station we used to listen to a lot (not that there's anything wrong with it ), but I don't think I got a response in before I woke up.

Patchy Memories [Non-Lucid]

Just a couple short clips in this one.... I was in this gigantic house which seemed vaguely based on mine, though I'm pretty sure it was just some huge building, maybe a school, before that.... I was in the living room and there was a huge opening in the roof (made as if it actually belonged there) starting in the opposite corner of the room to me and taking up most of the ceiling. I was fairly concerned with this as it was raining and all this stuff was getting rained on, especially the HD TV. Here my memory blanks out for a bit and skips forward. I'm in a high school classroom or something with... something, an egg maybe? But what was born from it? A bid? A kitten? (Yes, a kitten. Potentially, anyway.) I want to say that that's right but it's really hard to say now.... The last thing I clearly remember about the dream is that Wolfwood was there in the class with me working on some computer and I tried to talk to him after class got out and everyone got up to leave but he just ignored me the whole time.

Just to catch up on a few dreams I missed recording recently....

October 31

Fragment - "Weed smoking at some school with creepy guy who wants cheese pizza, blue teddy bears on the highway? The rest of us eat pepperoni." All I remember about this dream is seeing those blue teddy bears, they looked very trippy and weird. >.>

The Sacred Stream [Non-Lucid]

I was with M and at least one or two other people (who I think was/were imaginary) and after driving in my car a bit and then getting out to walk around we fell way down over the side of this huge cliff. We landed on a rock formation around half way down that had a stream flowing down it and started drinking it, and I believe M who noticed that it was, in fact, alcohol. o.o I took some large handfuls myself and it was freaking delicious! Unfortunately, when we climbed down from it to the ground there was some "tribe" of people there talking about how they were pissed at us from drinking from their sacred river, and then they started shooting at us. (I can't remember if it was just guns or poison darts or what, it's been too long now.) My first car just happened to be parked nearby so we all ran to it and hopped in and I started driving us away, though for a second I got really distracted by the fact that the headlights wouldn't work (), but then they finally did (). We pull off to the road and finally get away, but then I start feeling odd so I pull off to the side and look at my cellphone. Everything on the screen is fluctuating wildly, letters, shapes, and colors start switching around and pulsing and I realize that I'm hallucinating really hard. (In actually, technology usually malfunctions like this for me in dreams. ) I felt like I'd ingested something toxic and M was trying to look after me while I felt colder and weaker, but shortly thereafter I woke up.

November 1

Incredibly Fragmented Lucid [DILD]

"Stabilizing in a house...."

How disappointing is that. ._.

November 3

Pitted Against One Another [Non-Lucid]

I was part of some futuristic battle where people all fighting for their own personal causes were pitted against each other even though they had no hard feelings against each other, and I ended up fighting this one guy in a mall who was trying to set himself free of the hurt that he had because, apparently, he had taught every single person who died on a plane on 9/11 to read and speak English and he hadn't gotten over their deaths. o.o When I had to unfortunately defeat him, he, like, dissolved into blue code while telling me this story....

I really wish I remembered more of that dream, but I didn't even write anything down when I woke up so that's pretty much all I've got now.

So Fucking Close [Non-Lucid]

This dream....

There was a lot of stuff going on in this dream, but I only remember the ending where I was sitting in what I'm pretty sure was some kind of auditorium, on the stage with my legs hanging over the edge. I think that's right, I just didn't pay a whole lot of attention to those details at the time.... But anyway, I was sitting next to Jesus and we were about to smoke a joint together. Yes, it was literally about to be that awesome, but then it just got snatched away from me.... I tried lighting the joint and it didn't burn correctly. In fact, the flame spread across the entire joint near instantaneously, though somehow I was able to shake it off and it looked perfectly normal again. In addition to this, I didn't get any smoke at all from my hit, so I knew something was wrong with it. I even let Jesus try to take a hit but the same thing happened to him and he couldn't get anything out of it. I tried one last time but then just gave up and decided to roll a new one. However, the bud didn't really feel like cooperating. I was breaking it up, but the pieces were becoming useless (like going from some crystally chunk to a totally bland green leaf fragment) or just warping all together into other objects, like tiny, colored transparent pieces of plastic. Before I could really figure out a way to resolve this situation, I woke up.

God damn it.

Stress Dream [Non-Lucid]

I didn't remember this one until a while after I got out of bed, so much of the detail is lost. I had several friends and at least one or two of my cousins over at my house and we were all getting ready to go swimming after a while. I was looking all around for my bathing suit but couldn't find it, and my cousin K kept coming in to my room and asking if I was ever coming outside. Eventually I found what kind of looked like it but whenever I tried to put it on it would shrink or change shape or just otherwise not fit right, and I kept getting really frustrated. That's about where the detail ends for me.

I'm not too surprised this happened after last night, but I'm not really stressed out anymore. I'm really just hoping this entry convinces me to start keeping track of my dreams again. >.>

#1 - When Did We Become A Resort? [Non-Lucid]

I don't recall too much about this dream, but I do remember that I was with my family staying at some sort of resort, except the setting was actually just our house. There was some woman in a fancy (and shiny, if memory serves) dress doing inspections around the house/resort, so I had to make sure to hide all of the drug-related stuff in my room before she got there so I wouldn't get in trouble. There had been a lot of drug nonsense going on earlier in the parts of the dream I can't really remember, but I do remember a flash of flying a magic carpet through skyscrapers in a downtown area on LSD. Anyway, the lady showed up and did her inspection, and all that really comes back about it was that I had the slightest desire to try to steal the woman's body from her. There was also some comment about how people kept trying to give us these rectangular cheesecake slices for free, claiming that they were "flannel cake", because it was his birthday. After that, I woke up.

#2 - My Demon Pals [Non-Lucid]

I was walking around my old high school/a wedding that a bunch of people I knew from school were at. Walking around with me were two demon spirits: a skinny, normal-looking guy except for the fact that his face (and especially eyes) just gave off that feeling of evil, and a big, buff guy wearing a fedora and with a cannon for an (at least one) arm. Cannon guy was causing mayhem by shooting cannonballs everywhere, and I was just laughing. There may have been some of my normal friends with me too, but it's hard to remember now. I saw this girl I've known since really early in school, KR, running by me in a wedding dress holding a leash and a long wire for some reason, and I took the wire from her and kept running alongside her. A bunch of other people from the school started running with us and I had the feeling that we were racing each other to this one special location we were all headed towards, just to be like we were carefree kids again like in school. That was fun. However, that image was becoming fainter as it went on, and then I woke up into sleep paralysis. My entire room felt like it was encompassed with a powerful energy, things were constantly pulsing and waving, and my vision was somewhat blurry and distorted, and a bit doubled. There was also a loud white noise that sounded like some kind of demonic language, and occasionally words could be pulled out of it but they didn't have any meaning. I was lying on my back so it was hard to look too far down, but I saw the same skinny demon spirit from the dream standing at the end of my bed, staring at me with those evil eyes. Hey there, specter. I reached out a fantasy arm to him (as my real one was still quite paralyzed), and I felt my imaginary limb twist and bend along with the rest of the energy in the room. The demon just stared at me longer and I tried to give him an "Aw, come on." type of face, but then it all faded away and I was just lying in bed normally. Too bad, I would've liked to see where that could've gone. >w<

Supplement Dose: 10 mg Melatonin, 250 mg Choline, 50 mg Zinc, 400 mg Niacin, 100 mg Inositol, 100 mg Vitamin B6, 800 mcg Folic Acid, 500 mg Vitamin C

Dream Fragment - "Walking around an apartment complex with R explaining to him why DMT is special?"

The Secret Compartment [DILD]

The first part of this dream is hazy, but I was doing something at school which then became a mall. I vaguely remember seeing people I've known since elementary school, and then I told this girl MH who has the same last name as me that she's have to put something up my butt. (A quarter, I believe? ) Shortly afterward I became lucid, however, and I was walking around in some big department store section of the mall. The dream was quite vivid at first but rather unstable, and to save it I walked around singing "I can see clearly now, the rain is gone....", which worked like a charm. I was fully lucid in the sense that I had full comprehension of the fact that I was in a dream and none of this was real, but I still don't think my rational mind fully turned on as I was making some strange decisions. I decided that I wanted to steal a TV which would surely serve me no purpose for some reason, so I grabbed it and started heading toward the exit (the one that actually leads outside, not back into the mall). However, as I was walking up to the censors a thought occurred to me: if I walk out of here knowing I'm stealing this, the dream will probably make the alarms go off and I'll have to get out of here quickly, and that might cause an adrenaline rush which could wake me up. I opted to find a better way to sneak it out to see if I could get past the censors without a fuss. Also, when I wasn't looking the TV turned into a toy gun. I never really focused on it intently so my memory of it is hazy, but I want to say it looked like this one more than anything.

However, my mission didn't change, and for some reason I still wanted to steal this. I walked around until I found an attractive female DC. *cough* I then grabbed her, pushed her over, pulled down her pants, and shoved the gun into her ass. Hooray, it fits! My plan from this point on was to make her walk through the censor and look like they're just going off randomly because she's not stealing anything, then walk through and get it back out of her, but then I woke up. ._.

There were a few more dreams, but I guess I was lazy and possibly having false awakenings because I vaguely remember intending to type them down, but there were no further notes than those. >w<

Spoiler for Reflections:

Well, this was actually the second night that I took that insane amount of supplements, but the first time I had smoked too much weed so I didn't really remember anything, though I did wake up feeling amazing. This time the dopamine boost seemed especially significant to me. A couple of the times when I woke up I felt that my heart rate was slightly increased and my hands felt "tight", like they can from good MDMA. I also felt a bit of euphoria. Even though I smoked some weed yesterday too and that may have distorted my recall a bit, I'm thinking about bringing it down a notch for tonight to see what the difference is. It almost feels like I might be pushing this aspect a little too far, and maybe I should swap out a little dopamine boosting for some acetylcholine action instead. I suppose we'll see.

Supplement Dose: 10 mg Melatonin, 50 mg Zinc, 250 mg Choline, 100 mg Vitamin B6

#1 - Hyperdimensional Tentacled Alien Reality Factory [Non-Lucid]

This dream was fairly long if I remember correctly, but as it was early in the night and has a significant ending I've forgotten much of the beginning. My old friend D and I were back at our middle school, though we were still our same ages as now and didn't seem to think much of it. We got in my car, which was parked right in front of the school (in the parking lot), and we drove probably less than 100 feet, parked in a different spot, and got out and started walking back to my house instead. The park in between the school and my house seemed odd; the layouts of everything were arranged incorrectly and there was a ridiculous amount of very confusing construction going on. It seemed that in every direction there were lines of constantly moving shapes and out-of-place colors and textures (which is kind of hard to describe). The trees in the forest also took a very different path than they actually do. Of course none of this tipped me off to anything, I just turned to D and said something along the lines of "Wait, why are we walking? We could just go back to the car and drive there." We went back and got in and slowly got on the road in line with the other constantly-moving vehicles, though we had to drive on the sidewalk over lots of construction to do it, and we became part of the Escheresque conveyer belt just like everything else. As we approached the area where there was normally a bridge that crosses through the foresty part of the park, instead we were carried (because the road dropped, so we were more like floating now but it was more of a telekinetic pulling sensation) through what I can really only describe as some kind of yellowish-beige hyperdimensional caverns that also appeared to be some sort of fantasy town filled with enormous (like, their heads were bigger than my car) tentacled but vaguely humanoid alien monsters that emitted an aura of being some kind of hyperspatial entities with various astral powers. As we were pulled further into this it became clear that all of this was actually just part of a gigantic plane of perception that existed as a singular object which was simply modifying its own structure but was still just one thing.... And then my recall fades out and soon I woke up. X)

#2 - New Phantasy Star Dungeons [Non-Lucid]

I was hanging out with N, R, and J, and R and J had been playing Phantasy Star Universe apparently and N was showing me how we could use our PSPs to connect our Phantasy Star Online (which is not even a PSP game) files to their Universe files and together we could all play on brand new maps, including an insanely detailed forest where we fought a boss that I can't remember now, and sort of a Star Ocean-like medieval town that was in a circular shape and caved in to a sewage drain in the middle where we battled some kind huge red robot monster that was designed to have these really curvy claws and body structures.... Also hard to describe, but I thought it looked cool. >w< However, R and J had passed out for most of it, and N was slipping in and out of consciousness, so for the most part it was either him and I or just me playing. Near the end, N commented about how we need to "slow down on the rum" for some reason, but then I woke up.

Dream Fragment - I don't think this dream ever fully formed, it really was a legitimate framgent. What I do remember is that I'm pretty sure Linkzelda was there and we were talking about schizophrenia, and I vaguely recall either putting on or already wearing a two-piece bathing suit that releases dopamine, which sounds insanely awesome. XD

#3 - Karaoke Game [Non-Lucid]

My cousin K and some friend of hers had left a karaoke game at my house and I played it with her friend since K had already left I suppose, but I didn't really know any of the few songs they had already unlocked so I wasn't doing very well. Later the girl just kind of vanished and I went to turn off the game, originally thinking it was in my GameCube but then realizing that it actually had its own system set up next to it. I looked through the menus a bit more and noticed that it was a Disney game and the characters were all kids and moms. I specifically remember seeing a little boy based on Mickey and a tall, completely black-and-shiny-skinned voluptuous woman based on Minnie. o.o I turned the game off and wandered into the kitchen and started getting really nauseous for some reason. I looked at the clock and noticed that it was almost 11:30 AM, and I thought to myself that it must be because of all the dream aids I took. () I went to grab a cookie to eat to try to make the nausea pass, but then I woke up, thankfully not nauseous for real.

Spoiler for Reflections:

Well, this was an interesting night. First of all, all of the dreams were extremely vivid, even the fragment as much as it possibly could be. There were multiple times throughout them where I had to read things off of various surfaces and it was all 100% clear and legible. Background details such as the placement of objects in my house were also highly accurate, and even included things like the container full of cookies that were only added to the environment within the last couple of days, and the GameCube in the living room that I've only used like once since moving it out there recently. As for the purpose of the experiment.... Are my dreams subconsciously forming the way I want them to? Yes, I would say so. (Especially the bathing suit that releases dopamine, ohmygod yes. ) There was definitely more of an alien quality to them, particularly the first two, and the way reality was pieced together in basically all of them matches ways that I would want to influence them (it's kind of hard put into words how, though). The first one was just amazing, it feels like it's been forever since I had a dream like that.... Take me back to the factory, oh magical tentacled overlords!

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