Blue_Opossum

Morning of June 18, 2018. Monday.



In the first part of my dream, which seems to take place in late morning, I look into a birdcage and see what I first think is a dead hummingbird on the bottom of the cage, one of our supposed pet hummingbirds. (We do not have any pet hummingbirds in reality.) I feel that this will upset our oldest daughter and I soon have ambiguous associations with it being a mouse. Its head is facing away from me, though also oriented somewhat to the left. Later, I talk to Zsuzsanna, as I am puzzled about where the other birds are. They are not in their birdcage and I consider they may have flown away. Are some in the same cage (even though there is a mix of quails and small parrots)?

Later, I am trying to rest in bed, which is in an unfamiliar location (though implied to be our present home). I notice, to my left, an area out from the opposite corner of the room, where there are two thin gorillas standing, one black, one chocolate-colored. The black one is on the right in my view. They are watching us. I find it odd that we have pet gorillas, especially as the gate that encloses them is only up to their waist. I become wary of having these pets and start to consider that it is a foolhardy idea. I consider talking to Zsuzsanna about it but they start talking simultaneously in unfamiliar male voices. Although it sounds like a legitimate language, it is not English or any language that seems familiar to me, which annoys me more.

I tell them to speak English. They keep talking, seeming somewhat aggressive as well as somehow condescending. I jump into their small fenced-in area and knock them down. I quickly saw their arms off, then their heads as I hold them down. I do not feel as if I am danger or liable to be hurt at any point.

---

This dream had three precognitive threads, curiously enough. One of our oldest daughter’s mice did die (the first one that had ever died since she started keeping mice). I was also very surprised to see the three youngest quail in the same cage as the lovebirds, which Zsuzsanna had done temporarily, as the two older quails had now been picking on their three offspring. As for the two gorillas, we watched “Valley of the Sasquatch” tonight. I did not really plan to see this specific movie, and I did not know its content. There is a scene where one of the men cuts the arm off one of the Sasquatch.

---

Morning of June 18, 2018. Monday.



I titled this dream “The Second Storm” because of it being from a literal thread of my conscious self identity in vague recall of the storm that tore our roof apart in November of last year. However, our home is rendered as the Cubitis house (where I have not lived since 1978) rather than our present home. In this dream, I become aware of the cyclone or hurricane approaching. I am not as afraid as I would be in waking life. Zsuzsanna is present. It seems to be late morning.

Mainly, I am near the doorway of my bedroom (as in Cubitis). Rather than the roof coming off this time, sections of the southwest area of the south wall, closer to the ceiling, are partially destroyed, leaving a couple irregular holes. A small pine tree is carried through the hole in the wall (though this would not be possible in reality regarding the size of the hole) and blown through my room mostly in an upright (vertical) position, in slow motion, as are a few branches from other trees. I do not think the house will be destroyed. Blue sky and white clouds can be seen through the holes rather than signs of a storm. The roof stays on. I am soon aware that the storm is over and wake shortly after this.

Morning of June 18, 2018. Monday.



In my last dream of today, I enter a short but very vivid scene. I find myself back on the second floor of the King Street mansion, with no memory of my present life other than a subtle recall of Zsuzsanna being my wife. It seems to be the middle room of the east side of the house, where I once lived in real life. Moments before, I had full memory in partial wakefulness of where I was, but this is completely lost upon my short return to sleep.

The room’s west wall is deeper into the room than the doorway, resulting in a short wall to the right of the doorway when entering the room (a fictitious feature which my dream self does not recognize as wrong). I notice an irregular hole in this wall of which is about a foot above the floor. This puzzles me. Over time, I start to realize that something inside the wall is on fire. It relates to the electricity. Smoke billows from the corner of the wall for a short time (which of course would not be possible as the bottom of the wall is solid to the floor). I sense that the wiring, farther inside from the wall’s outer surface, is on fire. I look at the hole and see it is somehow growing (though is not visibly on fire). (This does not make any sense, as is often the case with dreams. If the wiring is burning, farther back from the wall as such, how could the hole being growing larger on its own?)

The hole grows downward, elongating and curving right, and soon resembles a reverse J-shape. The hole grows bigger, with a slight sizzling sound. It does not expand outward much, but “burns” downward (yet with no sign of flames) in a line. I decide I need to turn the light off. I flick the switch off and immediately wake.

---

A light switch, as with a door, is autosymbolism for reticular activating system mediation of the sleeping and waking process. Typically light, lightning, and fire are consciousness augmentation and initiating the waking process. (Even in real life, if I accidentally drop something on my foot and become suddenly more aware, I will “see lightning”.) However, since early childhood, it has also become analogous to achieving lucidity and dream state revivification through non-lucid dream control or non-lucid manipulation. (Many forms of autosymbolism of reticular activating system mediation can be used to increase lucidity and, by way of the virtuous circle effect and with countless legitimized experiences, result in an entirely different dreaming process than many people experience, including continuous non-lucid dream control where bad dreams are very rare other than when biologically premonitory). In this case, its analogy is simply turning the potential for lucidity off and waking at the same time, as I had already slept a little too long this morning. Otherwise, fire is one of my most common dream features, especially of microdreams and very short dreams. (There will usually be at least one inconsequential microdream of a small fire at the beginning of every sleep cycle, which has been the case since early childhood.)

---

Some people, when not wishing to achieve conscious awareness in the dream state, or simply wanting to return to sleep, will have dreams about trying to turn the same light off repeatedly, with little or no success, or of turning off a large number of lights in the same room, resulting in the room being as lit as ever. I have experienced this myself, and ultimately, it is hilarious, despite the intense frustration of the dream self.

Morning of June 18, 2018. Monday.



Subliminal awareness of the autosymbolic nature of the waking process begins. My unconscious mind is personified as an unknown female despite the fact my non-lucid dream self does not possess viable access to my unconscious mind at this level of REM sleep. Errors and distortions abound. She is a subliminal thread of my wife Zsuzsanna, of which my non-lucid dream self does not yet possess viable memory of or contact with my current conscious self identity. She has a daughter who literally but subliminally represents our oldest daughter at a younger age.

I am sitting on the floor in a unique erroneous version of the King Street mansion. The house is mirror imaged to its real-life layout, flipped east to west. I am in the downstairs antechamber while the female mostly remains in the living room on the other side of the doorway. She seems annoyed in building a small structure on the floor in about the middle of the living room, mainly from a set of small blocks of different solid colors, mostly blue, yellow, red, and green. They are about the size of baby blocks, but with a feature on all six sides that is like the knobs of a Lego brick, though there are four knobs on each side of each cube in a two by two pattern. A couple times, as the blocks do not fit into each other, stacks of about seven high topple over. There is a row of about eight stacks at various heights. (This is autosymbolism for failure to initiate viable conscious awareness.)

I am puzzled and somewhat annoyed, though not angry, in trying to rebuild the staircase that goes to the second floor (where I had lived in real life though not been since 1990), which supposedly is to be the real staircase. This is an extreme failure of thinking skills as I am solely working with small triangular pieces of wood. The pieces are only about two inches thick. The two stacks I had made this far are only about six inches high in two rows of about eight pieces each. I cannot seem to arrange the pieces in the correct orientation regarding which edge should face upward. I have several together, but they do not display the form of a set of steps. This indicates that my subconscious self is having difficulty in reaching my conscious self identity during the waking process.

Subliminal anticipation of the waking process continues but increases. This is after the subliminal recognition of a staircase being autosymbolism for the waking process despite its miniaturization in a setting that represents the liminal space of the process, the antechamber (what my landlady called a “vestibule” in real life). Vestibular system correlation personifies, which causes my dream to jump to a new setting, though in the same King Street mansion, still mirrored east to west.

I find myself on the second floor. I develop an ambiguous awareness where I start to become partly aware of my married status and erroneously perceive the house, though vaguely, as the Stadcor Street house in Brisbane (where we have not lived in years), though that was only a one-storey house and was nothing like the King Street house. Vestibular system correlation personifies as Glenn, one of our landlords from Stadcor Street. He has never lived in America, but my dream self does not consider this error. I have a vague awareness he is married to my landlady (only vaguely recalled as Zsuzsanna at this point, but this does not trigger the realization of my erroneous associations) even though in reality he had a male partner.

A vague thread of dream state awareness is present at this point, though no threads of viable lucidity. Because of vestibular system correlation personifying as Glenn, who seems very cheerful, I walk through the doorway of the upstairs kitchen, which opens to the porch’s roof. This is from vague recall that a porch can be used to vivify a dream, as it is autosymbolic of a specific level of dream state consciousness of which I had used many times in the past, since early childhood, to vivify my dream or “step into” a more vivid offset dream. This process developed from walking outside by way of the porch’s doorway. Here though, I am somewhat puzzled from being on the roof of the porch, as there is no additional doorway to intensify my dream or trigger viable lucidity (as the option to jump off the roof to fly does not occur to me). Glenn looks up at me from the public sidewalk in front of the house.

“You’ll have to use the catwalk,” he says happily.

I get the impression he had used the so-called catwalk and jumped to the ground from the outer edge of the roof. I study the roof and see a precarious narrow section of wood that is separate from the rest of the roof, which puzzles me. I stand on it, but consider that I cannot get to the rest of the roof (which has some building materials and tools sitting about) even though all I would have to do is step onto it from this supposed catwalk. Even after fifty years, my dream self fails to remember the dream sign of a cat being a “witness” to liminal space and typically near doorways (for the purpose of inducing lucidity in some cases), though the association had been distorted into the word “catwalk” in this case. (No cat is present and my dream self does not think about cats even upon hearing “cat” as part of “catwalk”.) The association with a “cat always landing on its feet” is not present (regarding the vestibular system dynamics of the waking process, which is often a falling sensation, based solely on biology, not “meaning” as “interpreters” falsely propagate).

My dream shifts into a different scenario as a result of considering the nature of the King Street roof (still erroneously associated with the Stadcor Street house) and subliminal anticipation of the falling sensation of the waking process, which does not occur as a result of this shift. Now it is a typical non-lucidly forced “haunting” scenario. I am downstairs again, but this time the setting is an ambiguous composite of the Stadcor Street house and the Cubitis house. I am now more aware of Zsuzsanna as my wife, though it is still not a complete recognition. She still seems to serve the role as landlady.

“How long has…it…been in this house?” I ask her this dramatically, speaking of the haunting, which is mainly nonthreatening. We talk briefly, but I become distracted. I find myself in a dark room with an unknown female. There is talk about ghosts and seeing physical evidence of ghosts in this house. I tell her, “This is the only house I have ever lived in where there is the physical presence of ghosts.” On one level, I know ghosts are not real, but on another level, I have achieved non-lucid dream control and revivification at this point to entertain myself. The old writing desk that Zsuzsanna used to have is present, which results in an increase of thinking skills correlation. Near the opposite side of the desk from where the unknown female is standing, another female slowly appears. It is a ghost. “Can you see her?” I ask the female. She tells me that she cannot see anyone there.

The ghost is a realistic version, as a “real” human, of Velma Dinkley (of the Scooby-Doo franchise), though about twelve years of age. She seems puzzled and very shy and uncertain. “Who are you?” I ask her. “I’m a goddess,” she whispers. I am puzzled and ask her again about five times. Each time, she softly says, “I’m a goddess”. I want to help her come to terms with her death. (This is a vague influence of “Show Yourself” from 2016, seen just prior to sleep, where I expected Travis to hug the ghost of Paul near the end, though he did not). I hug her, place my right hand on the small of her back, and move it up to the middle of her back. As a result, the palm of my hand begins to glow with white light, rays shining into other areas of the room. (I do not recall the association with Zsuzsanna having been born on September 13, though this was exactly one year before “Scooby-Doo” first aired, therefore Velma in this case is a subliminal representation of Zsuzsanna.)

The palm of my right hand continues to glow as I find myself walking south through the Cubitis hallway. I stand in the doorway of the Cubitis southwest bedroom looking into the semidarkness. Several unfamiliar people, both men and women, are sitting on couches that are against the west and north walls. (This is an erroneous setup, as the north wall held the sliding doors of a large closet in reality.) I hold up my right hand and the light spreads into the room somewhat. The others are puzzled. I step through the doorway and wake. (This is a vague association with a security system reading a handprint to allow entry, or, in this case, to exit the dream state.)

---

With this entry, I have attempted to explain the dreaming and waking process as best I could for this dream. (This is difficult in a society where most people have no viable understanding of dreams, many still believing in “interpretation” and “symbolism” in the popular sense, neither of which is real.) The bedroom is a literal thread of final recognition that I am dreaming, and so I choose to wake. The light represents attaining consciousness as a willingness to accept daybreak and intelligence of which only the conscious self possesses in waking life.

---