Fragment of Dreams
Morning of March 3, 2014. Monday. There is something quite odd going on here in this one. Apparently, when someone dies, their body is then inhabited by a living relative who acts “as them” at some sort of celebration or diverse variant of a funeral and longer wake, I believe over two weeks or so. I am not sure I ever had a dream of this nature or anywhere near it. There are even serious questions brought up (in my own mind) about the practice later on. Somehow, the situation is relating to two sisters who have passed on in reality (Carol and Marilyn) and my mother. (I am wondering if this is some sort of variation on the “three women” theme I have sometimes had since earliest memory.) Sister Marilyn is “alive” in body, inhabited by a brother-in-law’s relative, Vickie R. We talk, although there is something very unusual and “new” about the whole scenario. Carol actually seems like herself, but I guess that is relative to the acting skills of the one who is “inhabiting” her. Most of the scenario takes place at sister Marilyn’s house. I do not recall any other specific locations. Apparently, the relative who inhabits the body of the deceased for all the ceremonies and interaction and such is asleep (that is, their physical body is asleep) during that time period, being that person with the energies of their spirit and mind (even though I also sense that the person who inhabits the relative is somehow also living their waking life normally at times - which does not seem possible in afterthought). However, I have to wonder that if the person who is deceased is actually deceased, then how does their body function at all, especially after a week or two? They seem healthy and normal in their speech and manner. I also am not sure why my two sisters and mother are in this event all at the same time, since they had died at completely different times. Over time, I start to question how the deceased were no longer alive in the first place, as, in my dream, death makes no sense at all in the way it is portrayed, that is, how could the body be activated by a relative unless the person (the deceased) was forced out of their own body somehow (for example, how could you die if the body was still fully working or “inhabitable” by a spirit or soul or mental energy) - which makes me somewhat suspicious of the practice of this “alternate world”. My mother seems no different, that is, it seems to be actually her, at least most of the time. Marilyn is the only one where the inhabitant is actually identified for certain. However, there is also the idea that my mother’s “driver” is the spirit or energy of someone who has also died prior to my mother, which makes even less sense, making my dream more ambiguous at one point, although this is not certain. Even less sensible, if spirits can survive beyond death, could they just inhabit their own bodies in the way the relatives do in this case and live normally? (For some reason, I am not taking the fact of how bodies age into the equation - dream amnesia, I guess.) There is not much drama; mostly an unusual suspicion over how people actually die in this alternate world. It is not a strong emotion; I am just wondering what exactly is going on and how long it will last. It even seems slightly like a holiday at one point.
Updated 06-19-2015 at 10:03 PM by 1390
Morning of March 2, 2014. Sunday. I still have a cold (trying to keep it in the “background” other than with the cough on the first few days), but it is being “knocked back” day by day over seven days (had a lot of exercise today shopping and pushing heavy stuff around) - do not know how I ended up with a cold - as I said before, did not feel it “come in” like I did in the past. I can keep myself “out” of the cold, “in state” (which a special sound pulsing I have used all my life) for several hours or more, but it flows back in each time I “return” (a bit “weaker” each time, though) - so apparently even the universe cannot cure a cold (like it instantly removes a toothache, rebuilt my left forearm nerves and muscle over time, and healed my wife’s right leg from leaking cartilage, and several other things I can be thankful for and one more thing people “do not believe in” but I care not) - or maybe I have not found the exact “trigger” or symbolic phrasing to do it yet. I guess I still have patterns to learn. Exact pattern nuances can be tricky and completely unpredictable (at first) as I have learned - and they never use a word with even the slightest negative connotations unlike all the commercial rubbish out there (such as “I am not” this, “I no longer” that, “I will stop smoking”, “I will lose weight”, and so on - absurd and completely wrong phrasing in every way imaginable - and they actually make money with this fraud). In my dream, I am at my sister Marilyn’s house. Though I have validated many instances of legitimate “communication” with my relatives (far outside of what is considered “possible” by other people which of course means nothing to me in light of actual experience) when alive or in the actual state of dying (even of John Belushi), I still wonder somewhat if potential contact after their passing on holds any merit. In the case of my parents, I am certain enough that it was “something more” (and unexplainable by normal means), but not sure about other connections at certain levels. This dream is somewhat “average” (actually much lower than average in the second section) and I do not consider it paranormal in any way in contrast to the precognitive/telepathic ones where I learned about sister Marilyn in the first place in such detail and those were validated at other composite levels (regarding additional and unrelated yet-to-be experiences) with intriguing precision as is often the case. I go into the front room and call to Marilyn and try to “force” an association and encounter (even though this is not a lucid dream, oddly enough). I seem very mournful. Marilyn was like a “second mother” to me in my later years. She eventually does appear in another room (the smaller northeast one) and comes out and gives me a hug and it seems to go on for some time. She appears as she did when I was about twenty. There is no sense of additional energy or external presence as with some encounters in dreams, not even as much energy as some tulpas, but there is still a deep comfort. In another recent dream, it was brother Jim that gave me hugs (although that was far more vivid with more energy). Later, I find myself with a need to go somewhere, though I do not recall the details. This dream introduces a brand new composite. My sister’s backyard, instead of leading into the north/south-oriented alley as in real life, leads out directly onto Tenth Street on the other side of town, which is perpendicular to King Street, and the boarding house is there on the corner, appearing much as in reality. It is wintertime (well, it would be there in reality as well) and ice and snow is everywhere. Leonard the pinhead and another person who lived there for a short time nicknamed “Squeaky” are out on the sidewalk, across from each other (“Squeaky” on the front lawn and Leonard on the boulevard). Leonard seems to be picking at loose skin on his left index finger and seems more aware and “present” than in life. (He also actually speaks like a normal person - which is intriguing in afterthought.) Squeaky got his name from attempting to go near the pinhead’s living area (when he was sleeping) without being heard and stepped on a particular board near the doorway that made a loud squeak - and he accidentally repeated this a few times no matter how careful he tried to be. I ask Leonard about his finger but notice that I should probably be picking up some of the ice from the sidewalk in order to (if only symbolically) “pay back” the owners for ways that they had helped me in the past. I start picking up the ice chunks from the sidewalk and throw the pieces into the yard. They are about the size of a larger hardcover book and larger (and like most “ice dreams”, this part becomes a bit more vivid). Leonard says that his finger is recovering from the pinworm they (I assume legitimate doctors) took out recently. (This makes little sense as pinworms are “small threadlike worms infesting human intestines especially in children”. It is probably some sort of play on “pinhead”.) He talks about the “paraphernalia” they were looking for - a word that I have not heard in a long time (which oddly does not have the definition I am familiar with in the free dictionary site I mostly only use to quickly check spellings, as it gives suggestions for any word it does not have in it). Paraphernalia can be found at a “head shop” and is used by police to describe hash pipes and anything to describe items that are used for illegal drug usage. I am a bit confused though, as I am fairly certain that, other than a can of beer a couple of times a year or so, neither Squeaky nor Leonard used any sort of recreational drug even though there seems a vague concern about such matters at this point within my dream. As I continue to remove the ice, I see a few instances of desiccated dog poo (that had been frozen for awhile, I guess) near the edge of the sidewalk - and decide not to help the owners anymore (who I do not actually see at any time)… Obviously, my dream, at least in part, is a play on “trying to get rid of a cold so I can move on” (or to “clear out” the cold/ice to walk on down the street…) and the dog poo represents that the virus’s effects are still a part of my present physiology - even though the “worm” itself is gone. “Paraphernalia” seems the clearest expression from the pinhead, which is possibly a play on “Pariah” in his case. I was his only friend for a time. One of his only day to day activities was fishing (with worms). As such, this may also be related to a distorted fishing concept, which symbolizes emergence from sleep.
Updated 08-24-2016 at 09:25 AM by 1390
Morning of February 28, 2014. Friday. My brother-in-law Bob (much younger in my dream, possibly only forty, while I seem to be only about twenty) and I are out near what first seems like the ocean, but should actually be the Black River area of the Mississippi in Wisconsin. He tells me that it is too windy to fish, but I am not concerned. I cast my line out anyway and the hook blows back into my hair a few times (but does not get entangled or injure me). Eventually I drop the line closer to shore where it is rocky just under the water. There are several fish about the size of a larger bluegill. They have orange bodies with black stripes and are like a mix of striper, bluegill, and crappie. Bob calls them stripers, I think, though there is possibly another name I do not recall. We go a short distance north where the water and shore is very different. There are people all in a line along the high bank overlooking darker water and it almost seems like we are inside a huge building. I notice a large fish in the water and so I swing my line down near to where it is. I watch the fish come up and take the bait in its mouth. The water is murky, yet I somehow perceive everything clearly. “Pull back,” says Bob, “Set the hook.” I pull back and the weight is extreme. When it comes out of the water, it looks just like Monstro from Disney’s “Pinocchio” movie, angled more upward over time, even with the sketchy (cartoon) appearance. Everyone else is watching. It seems unlikely that I would be able to pull it up and out of the water (especially considering that the embankment is fairly high from the water’s surface), yet I do, and as I do, it becomes smaller and more like a large largemouth bass as I swing it around and to the other side onto the ground. For some reason, I get the impression that people think I had never caught a fish before. Bob does not seem to have started fishing yet, but I consider that there will be more to catch here. The whale is the emergent consciousness precursor, though its transformation into a largemouth bass is typical dream state transmutation by way of RAS mediation and neural gating in subliminal awareness of being in the dream state. My dream also features the common water lowering waking symbolism. The whale appears as the image from “Pinocchio”; Monstro. This is autosymbolic of the dream self being akin to a marionette, that is, not the real conscious self identity in waking life, though with the potential to be controlled within the dream by the conscious self identity. However, in subliminal recognition of being in the dream state, the whale does not swallow me (which would otherwise be autosymbolism for my dream self being coalesced into consciousness), and instead, passively becomes a largemouth bass as the emergent consciousness factor by way of neural gating.
Updated 03-14-2018 at 11:12 AM by 1390
This is a fairly short dream yet with blissful feelings in parts. Two airplanes, at two different times, supposedly vanish during their long flight. Somehow, which is rather ridiculous, they each had about sixty-five thousand passengers. They were not even any type of special aircraft; just a normal 747, I think. Each airplane was also flying directly above the Arctic region or the Geographic North Pole, supposedly a region of its normal route. The mainstream news comes on reporting on the sixty-five thousand people that had disappeared during the flight. The full story is not seemingly revealed in the news, though. Over time, I consider the one hundred thirty-thousand people that went missing. I later realize that my wife and I must have been on one of the airplanes (the first, it seems). At first, it doesn't seem to make sense. I decide that the people who supposedly vanished did not actually vanish but achieved some sort of closeness to the Source which made them different somehow; not invisible, yet somehow not seen since (by "normal" people). I see imagery of two silhouettes, mostly from the sides, which seems to be my wife and me (my right side and my wife's left side). Arms move outward and it seems to be some sort of intimate communication but not set to a particular location. There are no locational features or awareness if it is inside or outside. I consider creating some sort of pirate broadcast that reveals the truth about the one hundred thirty thousand people who were now linked to the Source. It doesn't seem that feasible, though, because people might not be able to understand it. I am not sure what exactly happened. Even if the people phased into a different form that could not be detected by others (even though they could interact with each other), the planes would likely have landed, though, just seemingly without the passengers. So, I am not sure if the planes and passengers "disappeared" or only the passengers "vanished" (without knowing of their "condition" until later) while the planes then landed - apparently the pilots did not "vanish", I think. This is not fully clear in afterthought. It may also be some sort of coverup where the authorities know what happened but will not tell the public. For some reason, this all seems to be a good thing, that is, a positive experience (for the now "hidden") for all on the flights.
Morning of February 27, 2014. Thursday. I am on the porch of my sister Marilyn’s house in La Crosse (who died recently). My youngest son is there (near the left of the front room’s doorway) but he does not do or say much. There is an armchair to the left of the doorway. My sister Marilyn is only there very briefly near the south end of the porch (farthest left of the doorway). My sister Carol is also there, seemingly younger and healthy (she had passed away prior to Marilyn). She is talking in a fairly fast way as she had in real life. She had a heart attack in real life at a fairly young age (especially for a female), but this was not directly related to her death. I think she is mostly talking about how to communicate with other deceased relatives in the dream state, particularly brother Jim. Time passes, and my brother Jim appears (who had also died). He appears fairly young and jovial. Prior to this, I had heard an unusual tonal “whooshing” in my left ear in three stages, which seemed to indicate he would appear soon (somewhat akin to a phone ringing, I suppose). He just appears out of nowhere on the middle of the porch. I feel very happy. He gives me three bear hugs though calls me by my surname instead of my first name (something he never did in reality - my surname is different due to having a different father - his father had died as a result of an accident while falling asleep at the wheel or so I was told). My brother-in-law is the only one who ever called me by my surname only, every now and then. My sister Marilyn also had a routine where she called him (my brother-in-law; her husband) by his last name when she could not seem to get his attention when he was commonly blankly “frozen” to the television. The part with my brother Jim is the most vivid and somewhat exhilarating, with a very happy and enriching mood. It is very good to see him even though it is only a dream. Even when alive, he always appeared in my dreams more than other relatives (excluding my parents) other than sister Marilyn. An offset scene from this dream (prior to these events on the carport) relate to my sister Marilyn (who had not appeared for very long in the carport scene). There are two somewhat disjointed parts. There is a scene where Marilyn discusses that a vest I made (not much like the one I made in real life) is not legal. It is not legal due to not using a certain kind of gemstone that has been “approved” by one (apparently snobbish) department of government bureaucracy. (Of course, in reality, this is rather absurd as more and more deception and fraud in businesses unfolds as time goes by and hardly anything is ever done.) Supposedly, the gemstones in the partial “vest” (which is a bit more like a woven, mostly woolen “breastplate” that ties up in the back) are not valuable enough to include in a hobby or project even if not put up for sale. These gemstones are in an equidistant squarish arrangement (about one and a half inches apart in each direction) and somewhat of a darker cyan shade, over most of the front. I do not think they are really “wrong” for the project, just not “allowable” by bureaucracy - for example, as a comparison, only being able to use real diamonds in clothing rather than rhinestones, regardless of any claims or actual usage of the clothing in any venue. Somehow, the above implications are connected to a confusing series of events. Firemen and police are involved. I believe I hide my “unapproved” vest in the basement as well as noticing some sort of weird narrow ramps (two smaller ones, unconnected with each other) in place of the floor’s trapdoor (located in the bathroom as in real life), which I have trouble with. There also seems to be something about a package delivered to the wrong address. I am not really sure why firemen would assume the role of postal inspectors or gemstone appraisers at apparently the same time. I pretend to be otherwise delayed in the bathroom while trying to align the ramps to the floor. It does not make much sense. (In real life, I made the vest in sewing class in middle school where there were only a few other males.) Later, there is some sort of Keystone-Kops-like misadventure. A female officer is chasing around an artificial (robotic) cat, which is causing problems with traffic and causing firemen to get stuck in trees during attempted rescues (whereas the robot cat just climbs quickly back down each time a firemen is “stuck” in a particular tree). The officer calls the cat a “bot”. Confusion ensues in a highly impersonal way. As usual, this dream had precognitive layers. Firemen actually did visit our house shortly after my dream but it was related to something concerning the neighbor’s place (of which we had known nothing about). No firemen or fire inspectors had ever been to any of our homes before in all the years I had lived in Australia and also, I had rarely dreamed about firemen in my lifetime.
Updated 09-30-2015 at 04:02 PM by 1390
Night of February 24, 2014. Monday. This seemingly night-long dream sequence keeps repeating at about four different levels. They consist of different ideas but flow in a seemingly important established “system”. Dreaming of a consistent repeating system (often related to a precise physical position you need to be in - or series of positions), “adjusting” to it, and moving through it again, is a fairly common type of dream since earliest memory, though I have never heard anyone else talk about it much. Sometimes it is blissful, other times a bit irritating and repetitive. Sometimes it relates to supposedly going into the “exact same dream” again from where you left off as long as several years ago. It even seems to have something to do with certain folds of the blanket (at certain locations) at times. The main aspects here…I am trying to mentally emboss a design on the side of the wardrobe. I believe there are several false awakenings. It is like two somewhat oval emblems side by side that have different languages or some such. There is some sort of exotic writing on each, but both different. The one on the right does have something that vaguely resembles a fancy cursive “W”, though, with other smaller patterns. I guess it looks a bit like two different car logos jammed incongruously together. Also, at times, I am trying to mentally work out the alteration of a waveform and keeping its exact same musical qualities no matter how the tempo is altered (there is software that does this but most is very unsatisfactory - adding annoying and obvious artifacts and obvious “stretching” nuances, especially with drum tracks). It is something like changing the tempo from 115 bpm to 70 bpm and working out the proportion downward by dividing the original by 12 (based on the 12 notes in one octave), in the formula (in this case only) being 70/115 = ?/12, which would supposedly indicate moving 7.3 half-tones (in a granular construct) down to keep the nuances exact. I have not tested this yet, so do not know if it is a viable idea - I have done similar work quite often before, but went by ear mostly. It does not sound very viable - it would be more along the lines of distance from source pitch by percentage, as tempo is not directly related to frequency (in Hz). I know the old sampler keyboards from many years back simply changed the speed of the wave sound, though (both faster and slower, for the entire pitch range), but this was too artificial-sounding (to the point of absurdity - but a nice useless toy for some “musicians”, I guess) to be of much use. Also, with other several false awakenings, I am mentally creating some sort of “wind tunnel” through the middle of the bed, about a foot up. This has something to do with getting rid of my bad cold (I have not had much of a cold or flu in years - regardless of all the foreign backpackers coming and going to the illegal “hotels” on our street - and did not even feel the “entry” of this one as I usually do). It will supposedly work by sucking up aspects of the virus and pull them into a different dimension. Through all of this, I am doing some sort of horizontal “slow-motion dance” over an hour or two, whereby my body needs to be in exact positions to maintain the work I am supposedly doing (related to the other three imaginary scenes). I think I am doing this in real life a few times, other times it is only from within my dream.
Updated 06-19-2015 at 10:10 PM by 1390
Morning of February 22, 2014. Saturday. This is a more positive variant on the recurring King Street dreams (which I have had off and on for over twenty years) where I often owe a lot of back rent and am wandering about at different times through a former or present room. There have been many variations. I end up looking around in the south-most apartment on the east side of the big boarding house. It does not seem to be the place I had lived at recently (and I never had that particular apartment in real life). There is not that much activity or movement from other potential tenants. Later on, there is a first-time (I think) variation in this type of dream. The landlady comes up and says I can have that particular room and I will actually be paid to live there. This seems a bit unusual, but I guess that is how it will then be (in my dream). I still believe that I should be paying her, though. Apparently, I had actually been living in the middle room (as I had once in real life) on the east side of the building, before wandering off and living elsewhere (unknown) or being homeless for six months or less, I think. Someone else, however, had been living there for a few weeks though my belongings were all still in the room exactly as I had left them. My belongings, other than a few clothes, turn out to be a large number of mostly hardcover science fiction books (including Isaac Asimov’s “Foundation”) and 33 rpm record albums, mostly in larger cardboard boxes. As I move them to my new living location, a couple others help, and the other tenant (about nineteen and likely a local university student) seems somewhat relieved that he has more space for his own possessions. Then comes the somewhat disjointed and more unusual part of my dream. For some reason, I put on the video of Rick Springfield’s “Speak to the Sky” (a song I played often in my youth - yet did not know he was Australian and from Sydney). This is not like the one I actually have. It is not any real video, though, and it does not even look like him. He plays an acoustic guitar (with a large mic and amp, I think) in front of a small audience on a mostly featureless and inconsequential stage. There is a strong focus on some sort of eerie buzzing effect on one of the guitar strings every two measures or so - probably the low E string. He supposedly makes this sound by placing a stick just close enough to the string to cause the additional sound each time. I suppose I should be wondering how he is able to play the guitar with both hands and hold the stick at the same time. I do not question this obvious impossibility, though. At times, it looks like an ordinary board from the outer wall of a wooden house. (In afterthought, this may be some sort of play on George Harrison’s “While My Guitar Gently Weeps” and possibly also with the saying “Speak softly and carry a big stick”). From there, not much happens other than a bit of idle conversation and look around at my supposed large record collection, spread out over about seven or more boxes as well as the same for the books. “Speak to the Sky” has appeared (or rather played) in my dreams more than other songs, I would say.
Updated 06-15-2017 at 07:34 AM by 1390
Morning of January 31, 2014. Friday. This is a long dream of flying. Hardly anything happens other than flying around over mostly a fairly barren area. There does not seem to be many buildings, yet there is supposedly a larger population. At times, I am wearing a rather loose-fitting Superman outfit but normal clothes at other times. Sometimes I have the cape, sometimes I do not. Most people either do not notice or seem a bit annoyed or frightened. I go to a small school that looks much like the kind on an old television western such as “Gunsmoke”. The only other person in the building (a one-room school) is a man with a beard who seems to be a teacher. I tell him that “all other people can fly”. I say this a few times, but he does not quite seem to understand. I say this because I seem to be certain that other people can fly, but no one does but me, which seems a bit annoying. I insist that “all other people can fly” but he seems to deny it. Apparently I am the only one in my dream (at the time) that can. I fly around and notice there are no buildings at all in some areas. The people all seem like pilgrims at this point. I land in the middle of a long featureless road and someone calls me “Kal-El”. Not much happens. The people sort of seem like they are from the 1600s or earlier, but only at times. They are friendly for the most part when I am standing on the ground. They do not seem to have any cars or any kind of technology for the most part. The higher I am, the faster I fly. The lower I go, the slower.
Updated 06-19-2015 at 03:07 PM by 1390 (Enhancement)
Morning of January 31, 2014. Friday. Dream #: 17,210-01. Reading time: 1 min 20 sec. I am in the “last cave,” the last form of existence bordering the world. I approach the wall to perhaps move on to “higher” awareness. There is a purple glow from the cave wall, a circle around the letter “M,” and two back to back instances of the letter “L” (representing our last names), which is also an upside-down “T.” It burns for a time, a “cool” fire. It also seems like an elevator button at the same time it is a lock (that I have a key for). (“M” can also represent an upside-down “W,” depending on the font or style.) “M” is Virgo, the 6th (Yin) sign and 13th letter, Zsuzsanna born on the 13th and a Virgo. The upside-down “T” is Sagittarius (me), the 9th (Yang) sign and my birth on the 20th (T being the 20th letter). It is within the circle often reserved for the S and C (our first names when anglicized) or 6 and 9 of Yin Yang. No faux system (such as astrology) means anything, yet can form patterns to discern personal recognition. “M” also came from the symbol for “water.” “T” is the second (2 again) most common letter in English (after “E”). It is also the last letter of the Western Semitic and Hebrew alphabets.. T over M - “cross over the water,” a play on going to Australia to marry my twin flame Zsuzsanna It represents TWO, approaching entropy of the English language (a coincidental letter pattern that spells “two”). The “W” (or “M”) splits into two instances of the letter “V,” the Gate itself, the Master number 22, and the bottom half of the Heart (in continuous cycles, also face to face twos). Even my last name means “the two.” It is layer upon layer, and all the strength of every member of the human race cannot move or change it. I am unsure where I will go. It is a phasing point that allows access to higher dimensions of any range.
Updated 07-21-2019 at 04:57 AM by 1390
Morning of January 30, 2014. Thursday. This dream is mostly uneventful but of some of the same nuances common to all dreams linked to certain types of long-term meditation. For some reason, whenever I use phrasing that relates to “universal” or various forms of happiness or health, I dream vividly about wrapped presents, often Christmas. In this case, though, I believe it is our oldest daughter’s birthday, yet somehow seemingly several years ago - and yet I also see a lot of Christmas decorations and sparkling wreaths (her birthday is nowhere near Christmas, though). There is an idea that we could share the birthday celebrations with my sister Marilyn in America (who has cancer now), but I am wondering about how much time would be involved. It is almost as if I am contemplating whether this is an “instantaneous” potential (in just suddenly going to America with everything in a matter of seconds) or somehow in “real time”, which would take days or weeks to plan and do (although I am not quite aware it is a dream). There are lots of wrapped presents in a few locations. Later, the landlord shows up (regarding something relating to the grass and the lack of rain and such) and talks awhile in the kitchen, and after this, there are missing floorboards which I am concerned that our younger daughter may get too close to. There seem to be some subtle “practice scenes” at another level where she does fall through (but is uninjured), but not in more clearer dream time. In real life, it would be only a short fall if the boards were missing. In my dream, there is some sort of strange series of conversations about letters written to my wife from a friend or business associate from the cat club from Maryborough. One scene (relating to the apparent disapproval of the friend or business associate) relates to how we did not date according to western ideas or so-called standards, which is not an issue with us as neither of us are mainstream and are not involved in mainstream culture other than my extensive teaching work which, however, never links to anything “fringe”-related (although I do warn my own children about New Age beliefs, pseudo-science, false systems, and virtually endless Doomsday propaganda which seem to be overwhelming these days, even now in 2014). Still, there is some sort of annoyance regarding different letters of how this or that “was not like the west” or something along those lines. Apparently, though, I later slipped into a really strange state in the morning. My wife told me I was talking on and on (in my sleep) about the “letters not coming out in order” or some such, something about the alphabet and other patterns. What I remember is that the entire right side of the room seemed to be linked to some sort of accordion-bellows-like construct of alternating white and black waves of some sort (not sound - something else relating to a higher dimension). It was sort of tiring in trying to calculate something in my sleep and I had several false awakenings. I could not quite get my mind working relating to this “object” or “door”; area is one plane (at a time) only - in squared units, volume can only be realistically linked to three dimensions (in cubed units), not more, at least due to supposed morphing from a three-dimensional perspective in viewing a higher dimension - although you could get partial volume, I think, just as with surface area of sides of three-dimensional solids giving you some relevant data. Still, the black and white seemed “even” as if it was meant to be a starting point for more complex patterns, perhaps. Perhaps it had something to do with “folding space”, which seems a fair bet. I am getting frustrated trying to work out what the net (geometry meaning) would appear as or look like, along with other connections to whatever abstract nonsense is occurring. Or maybe it was just some sort of surreal distortion of Venetian blinds and the highly irritating noise they make when slapping against the window frame every few minutes when a breeze picks up - when I am sleeping or trying to…Perhaps I am trying to calculate how to obliterate them completely…
Updated 06-19-2015 at 03:11 PM by 1390 (Enhancement)
Morning of January 28, 2014. Tuesday. In my dream this evening during a nap, I was looking at a dream journal site (not that common an event - I had only been vaguely thinking about the site). It becomes a standard to post dreams in a combination of actual photographs and pictures of a dream entry written out on something. In my case, I had posted the photograph of a very large cardboard poster near a fence (seemingly on a distorted version of our last home on Barolin Street) with a few miscellaneous items in the front yard, including a tricycle and an American football and some other items. I remember almost all of the “dream within a dream” in what was written, but quickly forgot it all upon waking (in the past, I had read entire novels in a few of my dream states, which is extremely uncomfortable - usually the repeat of a novel I had read in real life, but usually with a lot of additional distorted scenes). In an “additional notes” area (in the “actual” photo of the cardboard poster that my dream is written on in large enough letters to read when on the web page) there is mention of a girl named Angélique in our family - with a note on the acute accent on the first letter “e” as if it had special significance in my dream (that is, the implied documented dream within this dream). After this, a poster from the “actual” dream journal site makes comments relating to her own dream, which I also cannot remember. I know there was something about “being a portal” and something about “lu” combined with another syllable or word. The play on two meanings for “poster” is curious in this dream.
Updated 11-03-2015 at 12:52 PM by 1390
Morning of January 26, 2014. Sunday. This is an annoying dream based on too much time spent on one sound-engineering session. Normally, I notch out (or compress with polarity reversal with two “silent” matched tracks) the area 110 Hz (A) in a full percussion track (I also bring out 49 Hz (close to G) prior to that for the bottom of the track itself - some people use 50 (as well as much higher bottoms), but I like the matched tonality with a real implied note (many people could care less about tuned percussion or tonal bottoms - or in fact - as modern tracks prove - tuned anything - in fact, a standard in dance music is NOT to be in tune, even using the “detuning” function in VSTs - that is for people who like to use music as a “weapon” as they so often do these days). This allows more of the bass guitar (and low end keyboard in bass range). Sometimes I am meticulous and play around a bit too long. Taking out too much makes both the snare (bottom) and the kick (top) too light and may also create an effect that is too punchy and sparse in one range just above or below the 110 Hz peak. Messing about with sound waves is a very tricky business. At any rate, I am buying groceries and other supplies. I take out my credit card which is supposedly a “110 Hz” credit card. The cashier says that they do not take that type of card and I am very annoyed, as that is mostly all I seem to have with me in my dream. I am not sure what to do. I am trying to remember if I have another card to pay and pay with a combination of my oldest son’s card and a few dollars and coins that I find in my wallet. I am not sure why they do not take the card - I sense the bank may actually have issues with the store, perhaps in their business practices, not sure. I also have a recurring dream of trying to align two sound-waves (that are polar reversals of each other) before I can properly make love. This does not make that much sense, as the audio would vanish if they were perfectly aligned - I think it has more to do with enjoying the “hidden” ghosting frequencies of misalignment and probably the hidden side (mid-side decoding) “thrills” especially with the odd “breathing verb” effect of some side extractions, which I sometimes tend to prefer in modern music over the actual intended tracks (depending on the level of out-of-phase artifacts in lower quality MP3s, of course, which is often too much to take).
Updated 06-20-2015 at 07:58 PM by 1390
All of the information the government has been keeping on various people as well as other information (in the United States for the most part) about the government itself and its stealthy activities as well somehow accidentally ends up in full in various sources including the Internet, magazines, and generic newspaper advertisements. This is based only on one or two errors made by government, I think. I get an impression of being back in seventh grade at one point. In the dream, I had carried a snub-nosed revolver everywhere (including in middle school). There is a point where, even though I am at the entrance to the middle school, there are a lot of people walking about, mostly older women, as if it was a shopping mall. I tell them about the disclosure that is occurring. I decide it is best to avoid people during the time they are learning the truth about their government - things which I apparently knew all my life. Somehow, I eventually have a flintlock pistol which is only a type of large cap gun or replica (with the barrel completely evenly sealed over in the front with black metal or plastic painted a metallic black). It is some sort of composite real-life memory of a real matte-black snub-nosed revolver, a silver six shooter revolver (I used mostly blanks in it and eventually ruined it - I think the blank caliber was too big or simply unsuitable or perhaps too cheap) and a flintlock cap pistol I had when younger. I am aware that the simulated "wooden" handle of the flintlock is actually only plastic and have a vague lucidity that I want it to be real wood as if I could force other people to see it as real wood (even though I am not fully lucid - otherwise I would just will it to become real wood). I am also trying to present it as a real gun on a special day when everyone is allowed to bring his firearms to school (including rifles) so that people can share information. It is fairly large for a flintlock and the teacher, thinking it is real, enjoys the balance and weight of it. My sister M_ is in the dream, talking about the riddles and short jokes, one each on the back of a cap, which appears in the form of a large sheet (like postage stamps) rather than a roll, so that they have to be torn off to use individually. She is saying how she does not understand any of the jokes or riddles and gives a few examples (which I cannot quite remember). I make fun of them as well and tell two supposed riddles, but by example (in the dream) only. I say, "why is a cat like a match" with the answer being "they both scratch" (which is not really funny to me) and "why did the cat not use the match" with the answer being "because it's a cat" (which makes even less sense). My sister seems fairly healthy and alert in the dream. I am playing around with the large cap pistol flintlock by stacking about four or five caps directly under the hammer with a few attached to the ones in the stack. When I pull the trigger, the whole top of the gun catches on fire, partly caused by some burning of the additional caps partly hanging down the side, but I blow it out fairly easily. It seems amusing and I realize no stack of caps would be high enough to really do much.
Morning of January 13, 2014. Monday. I am watching, I think, a DVD from the local library. Often in real life they do not consistently work, but this one does in-dream. It is, however, fairly boring and I remember that it has a misleading title. It involves a teenage boy who I believe is in ninth grade and involved in boring escapades relating to collecting wins from sports-related gambling endeavors, as well as avoiding those he owes money to. This went on in my own school (even in middle school) but I was rarely ever involved in it myself. At times, it seems I am actually in the movie, but more as a camera-man-type character. The boy, at one point, walks up a flight of steps that is supposedly only for those in grades eleven and twelve to use and he is yelled at by an eleventh grader - it is on an open high balcony where other students are gathered and either gossiping or relaxing on their own. From here, he seems to be in an argument over who owes what, monetarily. There is talk and debate on the (American) football games and potential for the scores of future games. Somehow, pizza is involved in the forecasting. There is a recently-ordered pizza (Domino’s - I recognize the logo) sitting on the table in the cardboard container by the seated older boy (in a metal folding-chair). Supposedly, it is a new trend of “fortune telling” - by reading the random toppings on a pizza (received from any takeout place) and also relating to gambling. The pizza supposedly represents “everything” even though the other boy (the ninth-grader) denies it. It first looks like the older boy is going to toss a coin, but instead picks up a smaller slice of pizza and tosses that. The older boy drops the slice of pizza on the floor and it lands topside down, which also supposedly represents something symbolically in the upcoming football game. However, the pizza also supposedly represents the younger boy’s grades and schoolwork and life itself (as well as the dropped slice which seems to have been done on purpose) according to the older boy - as if he controls the other boy’s destiny with the simple act of dropping a slice of his own pizza. It seems a bit “off” and enigmatic and ambiguous all at once. “The pizza represents a pizza,” says the other boy, and walks away even though the other boy is still talking in a superior manner.
Updated 06-19-2015 at 03:33 PM by 1390 (Enhancement)
Morning of January 11, 2014. Saturday. Throughout my life since earliest childhood, it has been typical for me to have an average of at least one fairly vivid fire dream per week (but usually environmental or on the outside of my body, not internal) - not quite as often as water dreams (but both of which seem to greatly enhance vividness, even lucidity). Recently, they have increased dramatically (the last one being of walking up a burning staircase similar to the scene from “The Changeling”). There are a few different types of fire dreams, including some of very realistic fire and some of a more bluish “cool” fire-like form mixed in with the normal orange flames that has a more positive presence. In this last otherwise uneventful dream, I am living in Cubitis yet again (with my wife and family). The neighbor’s house to the south has recently been vacated. The very fact that the house is now without occupants causes a fire to start mysteriously (without needing a person to be involved in any way), yet “automatically” as if there is some sort of rule or likelihood that a house must spontaneously catch on fire as soon as there are no people living in it for a few days or so (not sure of the time required). (During a time in La Crosse years ago, vacant boathouses were being burned deliberately, both apparently officially as well as illegally.) I am looking out the window and watch mostly their carport and part of the front of the house burning for several minutes (after only sensing it will start up with no signs of fire to that particular point), making no attempt to call the fire department for some reason, almost as if it is meant to be, like some sort of natural, expected, and common event. There is only a vague sense of concern that our house might also catch on fire (as the flames become quite large and almost a bit horizontal at some points - the houses are fairly close together as well), but it does not dominate my dream at any point. There is still a vague idea that they have not completely moved out yet and may return to attempt to pick up one or two more things, as I think I see a cooler and a bit of fishing gear on the northern side of their carport, but it looks like it will just all burn up, at least on the inside (being a concrete block home with knotty pine and plain wood panels in only some of the rooms).
Updated 06-20-2015 at 01:56 PM by 1390 (Enhancement)