side notes

Afternoon of May 24, 2018. Thursday.



Vestibular system correlation is the most common cause of the autosymbolism of the dream state.

Vestibular system correlation is the result of the illusory dream self lacking the discernment of the physical body during the first stages of consciousness reinitiation by way of RAS (reticular activating system) mediation and modulation. This is a biological correlation, yet also inclusive of liminal anticipation of the waking process.

In this series, I will be including my original date codes rather than dream titles, as each event described and explained in this series is only part of a particular dream’s autosymbolic process. The date code is year (four digits), month (two digits), day (two digits), and the hour of the sleep cycle in which the dream occurred (two digits). This is the only viable way to order dreams, which I first used at the beginning of fifth grade. The order here will be entirely random as I look back and choose particular dreams. As I have tens of thousands of dreams and their causes and meanings not yet posted anywhere online, I am considering new methods of dream journal entries, such as sets of 25 to 50 dream events in a singular entry with summaries that are more concise, with their causes and meanings.

1) (1966122301). This was a series of dream sequences based on resets by way of liminal dream control (though of which partial lucidity was present at times, though lucidity and dream control are unrelated despite popular misconceptions). The most vivid event resulted in being saved from a fall from the Rose Street apartment’s roof by a “Shadow Cat” (from “Gay Purr-ee”, a 1962 American animated film musical). Based on the foundation of liminal anticipation of hypnic jerks (which I call “hypnopompic kicks” when they occur at the end of a dream), the scenario developed out of the unexpected disappearance (in my dream only) of the external staircase at the back of the building while seeking to use it to enhance my dream. (Since I was a toddler, I knew that staircases were autosymbolic of the dreaming and waking process, so I typically used them to vivify and sustain a dream.) Why I chose the “shadow” (in the form of a bizarre anthropomorphic cat silhouette, though in my dream seemed more like a helpful human adult, probably modeled after my father in this case) from an animated movie I had seen only hours previously is interesting. Most people see the “shadow” as eerie or even malevolent, yet the form comes from the preconscious, not the unconscious as so many erroneously believe. I have only ever seen the “shadow” as either a loving entity or a thread of my conscious self identity being rendered within the dream state for my illusory dream self to acknowledge and find validity and stability in (as the dream self lacks a real physical body, which vestibular system correlation is all about). (There is also a hidden factor regarding cats, in that they supposedly “always land on their feet”.)

2) (1964070506). At age three, floating, flying, and falling dreams were at their peak. In this recurring series, I sometimes chose Woody Woodpecker to be the factor of falling out of the dream state, depicted as driving my brother-in-law’s car with Knothead and Splinter as front seat passengers. The event was Woody Woodpecker driving off a steep embankment with a sustained scene of them in the car (as viewed by hovering in front of the scene) rolling down the hill, screaming, and waving their arms with their eyes bulging. This was loosely modeled after real-life experiences, one influenced by a road in Florida that was so wavy in shorter distances it was like going up and down on a rollercoaster, another influence from riding in a car up to Grandad Bluff, and another from the steep ride to Chipmunk Coulee, where we lived. Ultimately, from what others have written about dreams, these were not even technically nightmares. Fear was minimal and it was more like watching a curious impersonal scene. There were versions of this dream where they were people, not cartoon woodpeckers, but the rendering was still not very realistic. Vestibular system correlation autosymbolism occurs in different forms. This was more of a projected form rather than a directly experienced form.

3) (1965110203). This dream was lucid, though I did not seek to alter it. A gigantic bat flies over Carol (older half-sister on my mother’s side) on Chipmunk Coulee, though it is mostly only seen in shadow against the late night sky. There is no fear on my part, though she appears startled by the event. This dream vividly repeated many years later while I was otherwise awake and walking to another sister’s house just before Carol had a heart attack (but recovered from it) and coincidentally having moved to a location near the original dream setting. This certainly does not indicate that my original dream was premonitory, but that my mind “borrowed” and vividly repeated it while awake to designate prescience of the event. Additionally, I never saw large bats (flying foxes) in real life until many years later when I moved to Australia.

4) (1972020407). The song “Aquarius/Let the Sunshine In” by the 5th Dimension mainly influenced this dream. I titled it “When the moon is in the Seventh House” (the first lyric of the song), which featured the moon turning into a giant animated crow and falling into the closet of the southwest bedroom of the Cubitis house as the waking alert factor. (This is the closet I went to get my clothes to get ready for school this year.) As is often the case, this was projected vestibular system correlation rather than directly experienced. (There was also influence from a liminal focus on the January 30 1972 lunar eclipse.)

5) (1968111508). In this dream, I watch a giant eagle-like silhouette flying across the sky, between two clusters of cypress trees as tall as skyscrapers. There is an extraordinary sense of timelessness and nostalgia. This dream was influenced by three main factors; the Pogo Possum comic strip by Walt Kelly, the swampy Fort Ogden area in Florida where I lived when I was very young, a deck of educational cards that, when flicked through, display an animation of wild animal silhouettes with a bird silhouette flying above them. (Another deck featured a rabbit hopping into a hat, the hat rolling around, and a dove flying out.)

6) (1981112904). I see an oversized shadow of a raven (though I do not actually see a raven) move up and to the right (in a diagonal path) in the house in Cubitis upon the wall between the kitchen and the entrance to the hallway. It seems very late at night. There is a very vivid sense of timelessness and isolation, though not in a negative sense, only as if I am the only person in the region or in this realm. It is as if I am viewing time itself in the form of a bird.

7) (1988021308). With much of my conscious self identity extant, I find myself in the backyard of an unfamiliar residence. About five men are inside but soon come outside. One man comes out pushing a bicycle, down the steps and into the backyard, and I focus on how the bicycle seems an exact “duplicate” of mine. I say, with a sudden clarity, “How is this possible?” and he says with a very friendly tone, finishing with my first name as if he knows me very well, “Parallel ground Claude”. Thus, some RAS personifications (even though they always maintain the same underlying essence) seem wary of the waking process while others embrace it, though the ultimate purpose is to initiate consciousness. What defines the differences, or is it just incidental? Both a bicycle and an airplane are autosymbolic projections of the liminal awareness of the physical body while in the dream state. In this case, RAS even explained the meaning to me. His explanation of “parallel ground” is a perfect analogy to vestibular system correlation, where the illusory nature of the imaginary dream body correlates with the discernment of the physical body in the final moments of waking.

8) (2014030706). In this situation, I am back in my room in Cubitis in late morning. A large bird, which resembles a pelican, is standing on a chair near the west windows. There is no other furniture in my room. There is no danger, and it seems very majestic. It seems to have the essence of a very old mystical being and I think of the mythical phoenix. In my dream, as in many other dreams, I seem much younger, probably only about fourteen. However, unlike with many other non-lucid (though very vivid) dreams, I have a very vague awareness of my current conscious self.

9) (1971011502). This was a very enjoyable dream despite the implications. In late night, I wander out onto the carport (liminal space autosymbolism) and see that the house is apparently floating high up within a tornado. I watch debris fly by to my left (beyond the carport) and I am amazed by the vividness. I do not feel alarmed at all, only puzzled. On the east end of the carport, a large bird flies down to gaze at me, as if to offer help, though remains directly on the end of the carport. It seems very “wise” and has the essence of a very old “teacher”. I sense that it is “king of the birds” and it is even wearing a crown. I see that it is exactly my height. Although I associate it with a hawk, it was influenced somewhat by the Woggle-Birds from “Jack and the Beanstalk” (a 1967 TV movie), though far more “realistic” if still somewhat sketchy.

10) (1967122702). This extraordinarily vivid dream was directly influenced by photographs from a book; the Time-Life Nature Library “The Birds”, which I had gotten for Christmas at age seven. (The photograph was taken the day before my dream occurred on December 26, 1967.) My dream was a curious shift of RAS modulation (the primary form being a snake as the biological waking alert factor) turning quickly into vestibular system correlation. I was walking on a dirt road near an isolated cornfield very late at night, with stalks about twice my height. I had a curious “realization” of being followed by a snake though it is not crawling very fast. Soon, a large owl flies down and attacks the snake and I no longer feel wary. As with many of my childhood dreams, I had no clear awareness of my parents or my age

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Afternoon of May 20, 2018. Sunday.



To save time and space, I include my age (for the first version of each dream) rather than a specific date. As I have only a tiny portion of my dreams online (about 5,000 presently), this list is very incomplete. Vestibular system correlation, inner ear dynamics, and the autosymbolic rendering of liminal physical body awareness in sleep are the cause of helicopter dreams (though spiritually represent the Merkaba), even for literal carryovers into the dream state (such as actually having been in a helicopter, elevator, escalator, and so on). This is a key factor of the dream state caused by the lack of viable discernment of the physical body in sleep (and the ambiguity of vestibular system function during REM sleep), and being as such, is unrelated to the myth of “interpretation” for waking life. (Dreams are autosymbolic, not symbolic in the conventional sense. They are rendered by way of the preconscious during RAS mediation, not the unconscious mind or so-called subconscious. The dream self is the subconscious personified, which in non-lucidity does not even have viable access to the unconscious mind or the conscious self identity, but does have more access to the transpersonal interconsciousness than the conscious self in waking life typically does, which is a key factor of prescience and other inexplicable experiences.) For some dreams, there is detail in this entry that was not included in the original post.

This entry lists the factors of helicopter autosymbolism and is not meant to fully explain a particular dream or combined causes of a dream.

1) The In-Store Ride (4). Combines checkout (dream exit) autosymbolism with vestibular system correlation. I am vividly aware of being upside-down in semi-darkness in a fetal position in a coin-operated (kidney-shaped) helicopter ride. (Prenatal memory influence.)

2) Hummingbird Satellite (7). In childhood fantasy and naïvety, asteroids are perceived as giant prehistoric bones. One is approached by a “helicopter” in space, which is actually a kind of spaceship (possibly unmanned) and is caught in its orbit, whereby an “umbilical cord” (cable) connects the “helicopter” and “asteroid” (influenced by a photograph from a Time Life “Birds” book that I got for Christmas at age 7). I await news of its status.

3) Hallicopters… (8). This series of dreams was heavily influenced by my father’s Hallicrafters radio and the “helicopter” sound it made on certain channels.

4) The Sacred Rock of Thought (14). A helicopter only appears in the last segment to lift the rock (shaped like a brain). I have liminal dream control and “wish it away”.

5) Rocket Science? (15). A school bus slowly flying above the horizon in the distance has helicopter rotor blades and ambiguously has an “ancient” essence. Smoke billows out from the back. This is the last scene in this dream. (My dreams often end with vestibular system correlation as the waking process.)

6) Pterodactyl (versus my Helicopter) (16). This dream is based around liminal (non-lucid) dream control and the attempt to mediate the vestibular system ambiguity of the dream state. The pterodactyl is the RAS modulation factor.

7) Helicopter Digger (26). In this dream the vestibular system correlation fails and my dream is sustained when the helicopter, flying overhead where Leonard and I are fishing, crashes onto the ground as it oddly transforms into a digging machine (as the rotor blades continue to dig into the ground, which is autosymbolism for a desire to sleep longer).

8) Not by Helicopter this Time (34). I decide to get bicycles (which I am not sure are ours) to travel with Zsuzsanna rather than taking a helicopter, which is having problems, clotheslines (at least perceived as such) caught in the rotor blades and partly melted rotor blades. This has links to other dreams, such as ones where bicycles had melted and another where only a rotor blade was tied onto parts of a clothesline. Both bicycles and helicopters are a similar form of vestibular system correlation in the dreaming and waking process.

9) Vapid Comic Strip (34). This vestibular system correlation is based more on the precursory anticipation of the waking process and remains static in the ultradian rhythm event. I am looking at unusual daily (black-and-white) comic strips but I only recall one more clearly. A woman approaches a man near an alley and asks him if he has a helicopter and he says “no”. After the woman walks away, he says, “There goes my social life”. This is a play on the dream self not interacting with people in the real physical world until the waking process (such as vestibular system correlation) is initiated.

10) They’re After Baby Huey (35). I am watching Baby Huey (the cartoon ducking) in an unusual (fictitious) movie. Airplanes (as well as helicopters) are bombing the area. He does not even seem affected by an atomic bomb in the distance. There is a likely play on the UH-1 Huey Helicopter.

11) Twilight UFOs and Souls (36). A small unmanned helicopter gathers data about the souls that fly thought the sky just before sunrise.

12) Haunted Fun and Budgie the Little Helicopter (36). Even though the main theme features “haunted places” and “ghosts” (though at an amusement park), Budgie the Helicopter flies around at one point, seeming life-sized and “real” (though which is a mechanical park attraction, I assume, rather than “alive”).

13) White Camels (38). I fly around using a portable helicopter propeller.

14) Angel Doctor (48). Helicopters are only mentioned in this dream, as a dream character erroneously states that I am probably flying around because of a helicopter holding me up with wires. (This dream still ties in with liminal recognition of the autosymbolism of dreams.)

15) In Defense of the “Siren” (53). Burl Ives talks about how my wife Zsuzsanna called up the giant turtle and crashed his helicopter in a direct reference to the movie “The Bermuda Depths” (a television movie from 1978).

16) Futile Shooting at a White Gorilla in the Enchanted Forest (53). “Twelve multicolored butterflies eventually encircled the area (horizontally) so swiftly that they created a clear impression of a helicopter rotor - in fact, a subtle sound of a rotor was vaguely discernible later on during a transitional (shift in unconsciousness) period.”

17) Sensual Bliss, Enhanced Sense of Touch, Infinite Peace (53). Another family visits me and my family, arriving and leaving in a helicopter. I also telekinetically cause a stolen barbecue to fly back to its owner.

18) The Helicopter Bag (53). I try to cause a medicine bag (with marbles in it, though the contents become pillow stuffing later) to fly by use of a toy helicopter’s rotor blade and rubber bands.

19) Volcanic Events (53). In a very surreal situation, the potential of rescue by remote-controlled miniature helicopter in lifting us from a rug that is somehow floating on lava (but of which is ultimately not perceived as dangerous) is part of the scenario.

20) Helicopter and Seagulls (54). Seagulls telekinetically guide a helicopter I am flying in (in which the pilot had disappeared) back to shore. A young mischievous version of Zsuzsanna (implied to be a seagull in her “true” form) flies up (from the surface of the ocean) into the doorway to greet me.

21) Snake Afire (54). RAS modulation using the snake alert factor is sustained into a much longer dream scenario with Zsuzsanna. A man in a helicopter shows up and flies over the area checking for the presence and activity of snakes. He later walks up with a temporary map saying how they are mostly in the mountain belt at this time.

22) Pterodactyl Driver (54). The white spy from Mad Magazine’s “Spy vs. Spy” is driving a real car. His head turns into a pterodactyl’s, which then spins and becomes a helicopter rotor blade, and which then flies up and away.

23) Blocked-off Buildings (54). A helicopter crashes near a building at the end of my dream, causing glass to fly, though I (and another unfamiliar dream character) am not injured.

24) Straight-up Mining (54). In this dream, vestibular system dynamics are very skewed. Cars and trucks go straight up and down a tall mountainous structure for mining purposes. I ride in a helicopter with my wife Zsuzsanna in the first scene.

25) Dreams Define the Path of Waking From Them (55). A helicopter rotor blade is connected to the top of monkey bars (apparently with a clothesline, as the unlikely and illogical structure was supposedly being privately used to hang clothes on). Vestibular system autosymbolism and transitional associations with waking autosymbolism is combined, as the helicopter rotor blade also implies part a bridge of sorts in this case.

26) Helicopter Landing (55). A miniature remote-controlled helicopter somehow flies me back to our bed in our present home. Both it and my dream body phased through the ceiling in this curious waking transition autosymbolism.

27) Amusing Helicopter “Rescue” (55). Pierce Brosnan, as James Bond, but only about five inches high, flies a miniature helicopter to come to “rescue” me from the top of a commercial building. I oblige my dream’s intent by placing a pillow-like version of myself in bed into the helicopter to wake myself.

28) Helicopter to Spaceship to Helicopter to… (55). This dream was somewhat “dull” in its level of dream self awareness until the last segment. A helicopter flies overhead but transforms into a spaceship (unknown if alien or not) and back again each time it flies over.

29) Lucid Priest Indeed (55). The last scene in my dream (though part of a false awakening) features an upside-down silhouette of a helicopter in a magazine I am looking at.

30) Being Wrong in a “Nights in White Satin” Argument (55). An additional dream state indicator (as well as the unfamiliar bedroom I am in) relates to playing and hearing the “Nights in White Satin” Moody Blues song. I get into an nonthreatening argument where I mistakenly remember the song included sounds of helicopters, actually thinking of the beach scene from “Apocalypse Now”.

31) Helicopter Not Landing Yet (56). I am in a very large room in a commercial building where at least two unknown males are looking at monitors. I am “sleeping” on blankets on the floor. This setting is ambiguously supposed to be occurring inside a helicopter that is flying over a foggy area with jagged rocks (and I feel vague movement as such), but I am never concerned about any possible danger.

32) Return Flight Oddity (56). There are different types of vestibular system autosymbolism, though both are caused by liminal anticipation of the waking process. In this case, the association is static and an image is featured that displays, in four panels, an airplane (top panel), two helicopters (each in middle panels), and a flying man in a cape (Superman, bottom panel). All are facing to the left, indicating a liminal desire (or intent) for reinduction.

33) Bizarre Tourist Trip into the Past (with Apollo 11) (56). From a helicopter falls the Apollo 11 spacecraft, its parachutes immediately opening, the craft seeming a bit larger than it should be. I expect that it will probably explode (liminal dream control) and it does. It explodes into a massive fireworks display, debris flying everywhere over a dense forest, though my dream continues from here into other typical forms of waking process autosymbolism.

34) A Beautiful Beach, Cool Water, and…Almost Kicking Someone (56). I expect to get a “ride back” by helicopter, but instead, I become more self-aware and my dream is sustained by water reinduction on a beautiful beach at night.

35) Helicopter Ride into the Beautiful Mountains (56). I ride with others to high beautiful mountains to a fictitious workplace where lamps are made from precious stones, as well as at least one transparent statue of a dolphin with human limbs.

36) The Wrong Dodo (56). I am viewing the scene as if incorporeal. A dark-haired girl (probably a young version of Zsuzsanna) is piloting a helicopter. A large dodo (bird) with a blue ribbon around its neck jumps into the helicopter from some sort of door or opening on top. (This is not logical, as the helicopter’s rotor would otherwise prevent an event such as this.)

37) Fixing a Bridge (featuring Dean Norris) (56). A helicopter drops off a young version of Zsuzsanna in a bridge-fixing scenario with Dean Norris.

38) Usual Induction; Atypical “Snowmocopter” Waking Transition (56). A composite vehicle of snowmobile and helicopter occurs in this dream.

39) No Toy Soldier Rescue (57). A helicopter is apparently on a “rescue” mission to recover toy soldiers from the backyard of our present address.

40) Helicopter Vestibular Autosymbolism in Education Report (57). With the Department of Education report I am working on, I also have papers related to my own ongoing education. I see an A4 paper with my sketch of a helicopter on it and consider if the parts should be labeled.

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Afternoon of May 10, 2018. Thursday.



Although these dreams are documented and at least partly explained in much more detail elsewhere, here is yet another rundown on several dreams of the same basic template. They are all forms of the same waking process autosymbolism but with different preconscious and emergent consciousness factors as well as different depths of liminal dream control. (Liminal dream control is control of the dream state without awareness of being in the dream state. This is due to understanding autosymbolism and the nature of the dream state by way of the virtuous circle effect.)

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The Skunk (August 21, 1965; age 4). Doorway waking autosymbolism (doorway as autosymbolism for the exit point of the dream state). Preconscious Factor (with emergent consciousness correlation): Ambiguous; unfamiliar girl around my age to an uncertain transformation of her being my mother coming in to wake me. RAS modulation factor: Implied by the curious girl wanting to see what sort of creature is in the center of the dark room. Emergent Consciousness Factor: Sleeping skunk that suddenly wakes up forming question mark imagery with the white part of its body. Brief liminal dream control in non-lucidity. My dream self is puzzled by sudden vague lucidity, briefly uncertain if dreaming or awake, thus the floating question mark.

Witch Cat (February 14, 1969; age 8). Doorway autosymbolism transmuted into using the doorway to sustain my dream in non-lucidity. Preconscious Factor: The unfamiliar black cat with human-like intelligence and magical ability. The cat’s head seems to float and move up just in front of my face (from where she is in the doorway) in an eerie startling event - which is my dream self using the waking alert factor to deliberately but liminally sustain my dream - thus transmuting what would otherwise have been the RAS modulation factor of this dream. This is liminal awareness of my own eye movement in REM sleep. As such, the emergent consciousness factor (the presence of the cat) is sustained until my dream fades. (Note that this is only one event of many for this dream.) Mainly influenced by “Bewitched”; the episode “Mrs. Stephens, Where Are You?“ where Serena turns Darrin’s mother into a cat, so this dream can be seen as modulating my dream by borrowing this plot in the liminal goal to keep my mother from waking me.

The Orange Monster (October 30, 1970; age 9). Doorway waking autosymbolism (doorway as autosymbolism for the exit point of the dream state). Preconscious Factor: A hairy orange anthropomorphic monster had knocked on the front door. RAS modulation factor: The threat of a creature of unknown intentions at the door late at night. Emergent Consciousness Factor: The creature turns out to be my brother Jim, who is wearing a Halloween costume. Liminal dream control. Original threat transmuted into a familiar association with my cheerful brother Jim.

November Second Halloween (in three acts) (November 3, 1973; age 12). Doorway waking autosymbolism (doorway as autosymbolism for the exit point of the dream state). Preconscious Factor: My best friend Toby (who remains unseen). RAS modulation factor: The threat of several dogs on the carport, though not a real threat unless I choose to open the door. Emergent Consciousness Factor: The “dogs” turning out to only be flat images on a large poster (photographic) put over the doorway (by Toby) while a cassette of dogs barking was playing on a table on the carport (liminal space setting). On one level, this can easily be seen as liminally modulating my dream over the original RAS modulation, based on many previous dreams where a dog was a challenge to apex lucidity (in my will to lucidly modulate the dream state, as a dog is autosymbolism for obedience).

Surprise Aardvark! (September 19, 1981; age 20). Checkout waking autosymbolism (checkout as autosymbolism for the exit point of the dream state). Preconscious Factor: The implied cashier, though not present, though another dream character (unfamiliar female) goes to the checkout to take the role of the preconscious and drops a book behind the counter. RAS modulation factor: Not directly present, only implied by the “missing” cashier so that I do not “check out” of the dream state in a passive manner. Emergent Consciousness Factor: Sleeping aardvark that wakes up when the book is dropped, perceived as myself, starts talking and walks to the left (a liminal attempt at dream state reinduction). Brief liminal dream control in non-lucidity. The setting implies a library, which validates this as consciousness activation autosymbolism, as the non-lucid dream self does not possess viable reading skills (as most of what is read in the non-lucid dream state changes when looking back at it) or reasoning skills.

Snow Bear (November 17, 1982; age 21). Doorway waking autosymbolism (doorway as autosymbolism for the exit point of the dream state). Preconscious Factor: Polar bear. RAS modulation factor: The threat of the polar bear that I had thus far evaded, including with projected staircase autosymbolism earlier in the dream and even perceiving a setting as upside-down. Emergent Consciousness Factor: Polar bear standing up in doorway when I open it while expecting a mailman delivering a package. Non-lucidity in RAS modulation. The polar bear becoming the preconscious to emergent consciousness factor in this case may be coincidentally based on the typical shift to doorway waking autosymbolism because of environmental noise - evidenced by expecting the mailman autosymbolism, which represents communication between the dream self and the conscious self identity in the waking transition, especially when there is a need to wake and attend to real physical needs or to discern the source of a noise.

Holographic Toy Tiger (March 14, 2016; age 55). Doorway waking autosymbolism (doorway as autosymbolism for the exit point of the dream state). Preconscious Factor to Emergent Consciousness Correlation: Zsuzsanna. RAS modulation factor: Sublimated (as toy tiger). Emergent Consciousness Factor: Stuffed toy tiger. Sustained liminal dream control in non-lucidity (the fake tiger still licks its lips upon seeing Zsuzsanna in the doorway). My dream self tries to safely intensify the dream state by testing tactility, which is here a dream state indicator (subliminal awareness of being in the dream state) as evidenced by the blanket and the “sleeping” tiger (stuffed toy that begins to have living attributes in the last segment). Liminal modulation of the dream state.

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Afternoon of May 4, 2018. Friday.



This entry is for presenting a more concise understanding of some of the material of part one.

Lucid dreaming does not equate to having control of the dream state or of a dream. In fact, some dream journalists express terror in dreams when they become lucid, with far less conscious self identity control than in their non-lucid dreams.

Having control of dreams and even of certain processes of the dream state does not require lucidity. It seems to be a result of understanding RAS mediation from early childhood on, to where the virtuous circle effect becomes inherent in REM sleep.

Most people have the inability (liminal space blindness) to understand that non-lucid dreams are autosymbolic, not symbolic in the conventional sense, which means that a dream’s autosymbolism, especially the induction and waking process, represents the dream state and waking process itself, concurrently. RAS mediation and RAS modulation sometimes utilize waking life experiences, but they do not “represent” them. If there is no waking life conflict, RAS personification will still have the potential to be rendered as a waking alert persona, even in lucid dreams, especially when environmental noise is present, or when biological factors need to be addressed, such as hunger or the need to use the toilet. There are also literal threads (and of course prescience and other transpersonal factors) that integrate into the dreaming experience.

I have experienced viable lucidity in dreams continuously since earliest memory with no attempt to bring it about. This means that terms such as “practice” and “skills” have zero meaning for me. Additionally, the concept of “reality checks” or “reality testing” I cannot even comprehend anymore, though I have played around with various ideas I have read since childhood. (Some people actually do this, that is, actually ask themselves if they are dreaming at various points during the day. I am not making that up.) If I know I am awake, why question it? Presumably, this is an attempt to utilize the virtuous circle effect, but all that is required by way of the virtuous circle effect is to viably understand the dream state in the first place and to study what one is dreaming and have a feasible approach to working with dreams. “Reality checks” imply not even understanding that the subconscious self is not the conscious self, or that the preconscious, RAS personification, and transpersonal interconsciousness are not, either.

The Wake Back to Bed Method of lucid dreaming may work for some people due to the change in ultradian rhythm. In fact, any change will cause changes in dream content, including sleeping in a different orientation and especially sleeping in a different house. Facing toward an open window or open door while sleeping is inherently more likely to augment preconscious mediation (and modulation) as a throwback to the survival factor of RAS modulation. A more vivid dream will likely result, not necessarily lucid, but possibly. (Sleeping in a different location may also trigger nightmares.)

Now I will look into some dream self modes based on these two entries. The more lucid, the more accurate the subconscious self mirrors and models the conscious self identity to where consciousness is perceived as existing in the dream state (though this is somewhat of a misnomer, as otherwise lucid dreaming does not imply being conscious; only holding the awareness of the conscious self).

The dream self can be non-lucid and control the dream (by way of subliminal conscious self modulation and the virtuous circle effect of dream study with the understanding of key autosymbolism). The dream self can be non-lucid and have minimal or no control of the dream due to preconscious modulation. The dream self can be lucid yet not only not have control of the dream but be in a conscious self state of terror. (I have personally never experienced this other than when my dream’s modulation was biologically premonitory, but many people have written of it as an apparently automatic process for them.) The dream self can be lucid and have partial control of the dream state. The dream self can be lucid and have full control of the dream state by way of the summoning factor (apex lucidity). The dream self can be in a state of lucid omnipresence or being the dream state itself. This is utilized by manipulating waking process autosymbolism such as doors, staircases, or deliberately jumping from a high point as well as “freezing” the perception of vestibular system autosymbolism (for example, willing the manifestation of bird silhouettes hovering in midair - the “frozen bird shadow” effect I have utilized since early childhood, as well as the obsidian owl statue or the “cobra in the hayloft” events of very early childhood).

Thank you for reading. This concludes the two-part set “Redefining Dream Control as Unrelated to Lucidity”.

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Afternoon of May 4, 2018. Friday.



Writing an entry such as this is very challenging in a world where almost everything believed and propagated about dreams by the public is fallacious (in respect to my own personal experience since earliest memory). This is mainly due to liminal space blindness, which is the inability of someone to understand the meaning of his or her own dream even in what would otherwise be the hypnopompic disclosure stage, especially when threads of the subliminal conscious self are responsible for much of a non-lucid dream’s content (though this excludes prescience and transpersonal mediation). In this entry, I will attempt to address the widespread misinformation about lucid dreaming at a simple enough level for the average person to grasp. Ultimately, I can only write about what I know to be true and of which I have directly experienced continuously for over fifty years. It is not, and never shall be, a target of debate by the unknowing.

An unfortunate term I coined years ago has apparently confused a number of people even though I often describe it as clearly as I can each time. “Subliminal lucidity” is an ambiguous term, problematic for most people (especially those who have not had the experience), and needs rewording as “liminal dream control”. This will be a more consistent and technically correct term within the totality of my lifelong work. Realistically however, it is infeasible to describe the dynamics of a condition that people cannot even perceive foundationally, but it does provide a more logical term for the condition. “Subliminal lucidity” is a misnomer, as it was meant to mean control of the dream state in non-lucidity, where the dream self identity has non-lucid ties to the conscious self identify. Of course, dream control itself is not evidence of viable lucidity either, which requires extant current conscious self identity, not just vividness. Some people confuse “vivid” with “lucid”. “Vivid” means the dream seems very realistic, while in contrast, “lucid” means being concurrently aware that it is a dream.

Ultimately, “subliminal” should not even be used as a descriptive factor of the dream self’s mode, as the subconscious self is already a subliminal persona. A perceived need to use the word to relate the dream self to the dream in contrast to the conscious self identity is probably also a factor of ambiguity that the average person would likely not grasp, as most people seem to misperceive the “I am“ of the dream self as being analogous to the conscious self’s “I am”. I have tried to come up with a better term, but all are taken, for example, supraliminal, as even though it can be used to contrast the conscious self in respect to the dream self, it is only valid while within the dream state, as it otherwise is a reference to being above the threshold of waking life conscious awareness. So far, there does not seem to be a feasible word to describe the synaptic gating of liminal dream control, by which the dream self is non-lucid but the conscious will (not conscious in-dream awareness) is extant.

I will explain here why this change is forthcoming (with all references to “subliminal lucidity” to be removed and tagged with different keywords depending on the dream). Lucid dreaming does not inherently correlate with controlling a dream. Controlling a dream does not inherently correlate with being lucid. Therefore, the term “subliminal lucidity” is of no use to those who do not have a basic grasp of the difference between being lucid and being in control of the dream state. I have had as many dreams of which I have modulated by way of subliminal threads of my conscious self’s will (not necessarily current, for example in fully controlling a dream without even having any viable memory of the last twenty years of my life), by way of my subconscious self, as I have in various states of lucidity. Here I must still clarify the obvious according to current consensus.

Being lucid, in consensus terminology, means that the subconscious self is aware that it is in the dream state to where many more viable threads of the current conscious self’s identity, desire, and will are extant than in non-lucidity, but in stark contrast, controlling a dream means influencing features and content, including by the summoning factor (both subliminally and non-subliminally). One does not depend on the other. I emphasize this because many people propagate the mistaken belief that dream control only occurs with being lucid. In fact, a person’s dream self can be lucid without having any control of the dream state at all (for example, lucid nightmares). A person’s dream self can modulate the dream features and content over that of the preconscious factor or RAS precursors without having any awareness of being in the dream state, and typically for me, without even having any memory of what a dream is. A full understanding of this is required for coherent thinking about dreams in general.

The falsehood of lucidity equating control must be dissolved for one to develop a full understanding of the dream state. Dream control in non-lucidity has been continuous for me since early childhood and over time, has developed by way of the virtuous circle effect. Additionally, the conscious self identity’s expectation is a major part of a dream’s autosymbolism, of which I have understood the meanings of for over fifty years. This is important because there are a number of people, including a number of religious zealots, who believe that a dream can never be controlled or influenced at all even in lucidity. What they express provides proof that they have zero understanding of either lucidity, dream control, or even hold a basic understanding of dreams. Neither the truth nor even a thread of truth is even visible to them. All they could do is deny what they could not even comprehend (liminal space blindness).

In part two, I will try to simplify the information in this entry with a more concise approach of certain concepts and a list of possible dream self modes, of which are otherwise inherently transient through the different stages of sleeping and dreaming.

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Afternoon of April 30, 2018. Monday.



This entry is required reading for anyone who wants to develop a better understanding of dreams and the various causes of dream content and inherent meanings.

In this entry, I will be writing more about the nature of vestibular system correlation. This is my most common form of autosymbolism throughout the tens of thousands of dreams I have studied and decoded for over fifty years since early childhood. It can occur in a few different dreams per sleep cycle. Ultimately, it is my main recurring factor of dream state transition, even in lucid dreams, and is augmented in some auto-scripted dreams, as deliberately auto-scripted dreams have unavoidable though incidental stark contrasts with circadian rhythms dynamics, a main factor of sleeping and dreaming.

Since childhood (around age nine), I have tried to determine causes of different types of vestibular system correlation, which, while in a dream, ranges from subliminal to intrusive; for example, dreams of falling and even a dream where an intruder tried to force me to grow a bird of prey’s talon from my right thumb. By way of RAS mediation, a simulacrum of vestibular system correlation is created in one of several different ways, including specialized preconscious personification or even features such as a bird as a “teacher” or a “villain” depending on the concurrent dynamics of the particular state (including the subliminal willingness to wake or continue sleeping). For example, in the most vivid dream I have ever had, a resplendent quetzal flew down to become the partner of an earthbound bantam silver sebright rooster (the one I had as a pet in childhood but long dead in reality). RAS personification may be “friendly” or “invasive” depending on the status of the dream self’s attention, which may not be related to waking life or the conscious self identity or experience at all, but the progression of the waking stage and the status of current dream self awareness and depth.

Vestibular system correlation comes in many different forms. In some cases, it depends on sleeping position. Sleeping position has a major influence on both depth of sleep and the nature of the dream state and the types of dreams that result. Waking life vestibular system ambiguity results in dizziness, although in dreams this is more about subliminal anticipation of the waking process, the main factor of a non-lucid dream’s autosymbolism.

The processes relating to vestibular system correlation comes from the dream self’s virtual vestibular system being separate from the real vestibular system of the physical body in REM sleep. To put it simpler, the subconscious self does not have a viable awareness of the real physical body while sleeping. This is what causes the sensations of flying, falling, rising, and movement in general, which of course, is an illusion. (On a side note, dizziness in waking life is of course an illusion as the room is not literally spinning around you as you are discerning it as such.)

The description of REM sleep muscle atonia by Jouvet and Michel (1959) helped to presage the idea that dreaming was constituted by virtual perception and movement. Real (waking) perception and movement were actively blocked, while the brain was forced to generate a virtual simulacrum of waking consciousness. (“Virtual reality and consciousness inference in dreaming”, Front Psychol. 2014; 5: 1133.) This does not mean that dream state indicators (such as the appearance of a bed or being undressed) or other subliminal awareness of being asleep does not come into play as a thread in a dream’s hodgepodge.

Vestibular system ambiguity can flow from passive to dominant (dream self is moving toward consciousness) or from dominant to passive (dream self is slipping back into sleep). It does not make any sense to “interpret” autosymbolic biological factors, but this is what many people do. It is important to understand that dreams, contrary to popular belief, do not symbolically “represent” waking life, but are meant to occasionally borrow waking life factors to initiate the return to consciousness.

In the case of the specific factor discussed in this entry, it is not possible to consciously control vestibular system ambiguity in the dream state, lucid or not, though an aspect of it can be held, for example, in flying dreams (both lucid and non-lucid) where the real vestibular perception of the physical body does not dominate the liminal state or space. Some people seem to believe that falling dreams are a result of waking life anxiety. I have never seen any personal evidence of this. The vividness of falling dreams increases exponentially after I have had a lot more exercise, especially with more time spent walking. Such a dream is also more likely if I had been in an elevator that day, and I have no anxiety regarding elevators in waking life. My most vivid falling dream occurred during the night after experiencing the log flume ride at Busch Gardens earlier that day.

Falling dreams (in addition to the talon dream mentioned above) are also sometimes caused by environmental noise. Even in waking life, high levels of noise may stimulate the vestibular system and thereby cause disturbances in the balancing mechanism. Babies apparently experience falling dreams by way of the Moro reflex, which I have often seen in my own children when they were babies.

Understanding the nature of vestibular system correlation and dream state and waking process autosymbolism in general will help you to easily dismiss the nonsensical psychobabble and superstition concerning dreams of which is virtually everywhere, but of which is a great disservice to present day society (at least for people who have never held the desire of looking into the causes of their own dreams).

One of the most important aspects to understand about dreams is, just as with sequences of waking life thoughts, a dream is not just one event. Even though I typify dreams based on their main factor, there are always threads of other processes integrating into the dream state, again, just as with waking life thoughts. This is why saying that a dream relates to one thing makes no sense - any more than claiming every singular thought in a period of twenty minutes is “about” the same thing. Dreams are a result of many different types of threads coming together in a synthesized composite. Until that is understood, there is no hope of discerning the nature of the dream state.

On a side note, some people apparently do not dream of flying very often or at all, when the majority of my dreams have this potential. I effortlessly take to the sky as perceiving it in the same way as I do walking in waking life in both lucidity and non-lucidity. The highest level of apex lucidity however, does not have this potential, as the discernment of physicality is too augmented, complete with the extremely realistic feeling of weight, movement, and momentum (impetus).

On a final note, I should point out that falling can also serve as induction into a more vivid dream, though this is rare for me (though I prefer creating and using a difficult door for an astounding increase in vividness). Some people do not seem to believe this because of the ludicrous myth about dying in a dream if you do not wake up before your fall completes. It is one of many nonsensical myths propagated by people with virtually no dreaming experience.

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Morning of February 18, 2018. Sunday.



Explain Subconscious Self

Explain Personified Subconscious

The dream self is the subconscious, though I mostly only use the term “personified subconscious” (though I confess that I do not like the word “subconscious” in general as virtually everyone in the world uses it incorrectly at one point or another). It certainly is not the conscious self identity and it cannot be the unconscious essence, as the unconscious has viable memory of which the dream state rarely reflects (at least in non-lucidity, but often in some forms of lucidity as well). As the subconscious band is just a dynamic filter, with no temporal cohesion or thinking skills, it is senseless to attribute intelligence to it as many people do (though most people actually mean ECF and unconscious mediation when using such examples).

Explain Vestibular System Personification

Explain VSP

Vestibular System Personification is a result of biological RAS modulation. This occurs due to vestibular system ambiguity, which is the perceptual conflict caused by perceiving the imaginary dream body as in a different position or orientation as the real physical body. This is what causes falling dreams, but on a positive note, flying dreams.

I do not usually include the dream self as personification of any unconscious factor other than the subconscious itself. Examples of VSP might be, seeing someone falling, seeing someone flying, watching someone in an elevator or climbing stairs, an airplane pilot, someone flying a kite, and so on. Other RAS dynamics might be involved depending on the dream and what stage of the dream and level of unconsciousness are relevant.

Explain Personified Unconscious

Explain Unconscious Personification

Unconscious Personification is likely only to occur in induction and sustained stages of a dream, where it is eventually modulated by RAS or ECF out of biological necessity, including a need to use the toilet or to more viably discern the source of an environmental noise (especially an unexpected sound in the immediate environment).

Explain RAS

RAS stands for Reticular Activating System. It is not feasible to write it out each time, so I usually only use RAS. It is a part of the brain (reticular formation) that mediates between the ephemeral fictional dream self incarnation and its illusory perception and the conscious self identity.

Explain RAS Mediation

RAS is partially the foundation of consciousness reascension autoymbolism, which is what the majority of non-lucid dreams are in the final stages. However, without ECF, there would likely be what is known as a coma.

Explain RAS Modulation

RAS Modulation occurs when the dream self is too “stubborn” or “absent” (likely by threads of the conscious self identity that choose to remain dormant longer) to move into consciousness reascension on its own.

Explain Preconscious Personification

Explain Personified Preconscious

The Personified Preconscious is typically the final and most dominant character in a dream other than the dream self, though may be paired with the emergent consciousness. It may chase the dreamer. It may intrude into the dreamer’s home. It may, in contrast, hug the dreamer into the coalescence stage (consciousness reascension). Conflict with the preconscious or RAS modulation is often unrelated to current waking life conflict other than incidentally. It is important to understand however, that conflict in a dream can be prescient either by transpersonal factors (natural or subliminal instinct) or self-fulfilling prophecy.

Explain Emergent Consciousness

Explain Emergent Consciousness Factor

Explain Emergent Consciousness Personification

Explain ECF

Explain ECP

Without the Emergent Consciousness Factor, RAS would not have enough to work with. Emergent Consciousness Factors can occur in dreams in many forms, including books (as only the conscious self can viably read, as writing or print often becomes nonsensical or changes upon a second glance in dreams), computers, flashlights, towers, candles, burning towers or belfries (ECF parallel autosymbolism), lightning (more specifically as neural energy though sometimes an indication of physical pain or numbness depending on the dream or dreamer) and so on.

The hierarchy of the dream state, in my fifty years of experience are, unconscious, personified subconscious (dream self), preconscious, RAS, emergent consciousness, conscious self identity.

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This dream journal entry is specifically for search engines and website search functions.

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Afternoon of February 16, 2018. Friday.



This is a compilation entry, though simplified, based on many key dreams which designate a door or doorway as neural gating of a specific type, typically under the subconscious self’s choice in both non-lucid events to apex lucidity (though in apex lucidity, the true conscious self identity is far more extant and viable). A door as rendered in either a non-lucid dream or lucid dream has always solely served as either the exit point of the dream state or, in some cases, to augment and stabilize the precursor to apex lucidity. Note that the summary for each dream does not reflect the entire dream.

Dogpile, from February 19, 1972. I had entered apex lucidity (in my final dream of this date) with my dream rendering the correct time; early morning after sunrise. I see the bony remains of a dead dog halfway between the railroad tracks and the edge of our backyard. I notice that a smaller dog seems to be guarding the remains. The dog (of which is facing me, though at a distance) soon notices me and begins to growl menacingly. The ghost of the other dog rises up from the bones and seems to pose a threat as well. They both run toward me. My position had been the easternmost end of the Cubitis carport. I deliberately run and jump through the doorway of the Cubitis house to wake myself.

Both RAS and the emergent consciousness factor “chase” me into consciousness. As my lucid dream self, I recognize this common autosymbolic event and its meaning while still in the dream state but I do not attempt to contest it. Instead, I choose to find a doorway to jump through to purposely leave the dream state. I manage to jump and fall halfway through the doorway, anticipating the sensation of the dogs biting my heels (anticipating the common hypnopompic kick as a result), though there is no sense of pain in liminal space. RAS was often rendered as an aggressive dog of which challenged my will to control the dream state as a child. This is based on two factors, my dream potentially “obeying” my lucid dream self’s will and a dog being the closest analogy to that, and the RAS factor being influenced by having seen “The Hound of the Baskervilles” (1959 version) a few times, which designated a dog as being an attack factor. (I had no fear or concern of dogs in waking life, as much of what occurs in a dream is based on the dream state itself in its autosymbolic transitions, not waking life unless prescient or “received” from loved ones.)

The emergent consciousness factor as the ghost dog, as divided from RAS, is based on known dynamics. The remains were where we had bonfires in real life, thus designate the recurring Phoenix Factor as symbolizing re-emergence into full consciousness via biological RAS gating. Additionally, it appeared as a ghost due to the dream self identity not being the complete conscious self identity.

Catlike Shadow Creature and Shopping, from September 10, 2016. A non-lucid but vivid sequence features a cat shadow as my emergent consciousness precursor (not a waking factor of which the common checkout autosymbolism was eventually rendered as the waking transition in this dream). Upon approaching it, it leaps impossibly into the top of the closed door and somehow slides through the narrow gap between door and door frame. The Shadow is my conscious self identity. As the conscious self identity cannot exist within unconsciousness, it has often been rendered as either a cat or shadow (or in this case, both) in my dreams since early childhood. As such, it is a liminal space denizen for several reasons. One, it is associated with “always landing on its feet” relating to the falling sensation that occurs as a result of vestibular system ambiguity, a biological factor of the waking transition. Two, its being associated with sitting on a fence, a fence as autosymbolism for liminal space division (between dream self and conscious self). Thirdly, a cat by popular myth “having nine lives”, is like the Phoenix Factor of returning to whole consciousness. There is an additional very curious factor which had been influenced by the ending scene of “The Flintstones”, which I am even aware of in this particular dream in the specific movement of the cat creature. This is where Fred picks up the sabretooth cat, puts it outside, and the cat goes back in through the window and then puts Fred out. There have been a number of endings of various television shows that were borrowed for RAS mediation (typically only as dream state end markers and waking precursors or at least transitions of levels of unconsciousness).

The Old Shack, from August 24, 1970. As with Dogpile, I use a virtual doorway to deliberately “escape” the dream state. In this case, threatening flight as a vestibular system ambiguity dynamic, a pterodactyl, chases me across a field. As I dive through the “doorway”, in this case the ruins of an outdoor rose trellis linked to an old fence on each side, I see the pterodactyl that I was concerned about turn back into a sparrow, as it falls upside-down from the sky. In this case, I perceived my emergent consciousness (the shadow on the ground, of which the pterodactyl cast) as somewhat ominous, a viewpoint that rarely occurs as an adult due to having learned so much about the dream state.

Ocean Beyond the Doorway (with Kenneth Hill), from February 9, 1975. In this dream, I want to find my “dream girl” (the precognitive form of Zsuzsanna long before we met in reality). My dream ends with me standing on Kenneth’s left. (RAS usually modulates from the right side of my dream self in dream self to conscious self mediation due to me sleeping on my left side with my right side more exposed to my real environment). I sadly tell Kenneth that “It didn’t work” when opening a fictional door in the Cubitis hallway (west side) and seeing the ocean in afternoon light. Although the ocean also represents the transpersonal nature of unconsciousness, in this case, it was also a rendering of the fact that Zsuzsanna lived across the ocean from me in real life at the time. There were a number of other dreams where I was “blocked” by the ocean. The ocean usually only occurs in my last dream of a sleeping period (due to it also representing circadian rhythms dynamics and the nature of sleep in relationship to consciousness as an analogy to the tidal factors of the world), whereas lakes and rivers occur in all stages of sleep until water lowering waking symbolism becomes a key factor.

Batwing Doors, from October 22, 2017. In this dream’s final scene, Zsuzsanna is eventually standing directly behind fancy batwing doors. The doorway waking symbolism included the RAS hybrid factor of vestibular system associations (“return flight”, a factor of over one in five of my dreams).

A door as the potential exit point of a dream (in fact, the main symbol for this precursory event) differs only slightly from the fence feature. That can be seen in the following dream:

Through the Fence, from April 17, 2014. In this dream, I move between a narrow gap in the high wooden fence (in our present backyard or what resembles it) as if it was a door. A group of Aboriginal Australian girls move from near the front of their house, coming to talk to me (perhaps because I am seen by them as trespassing). The final scene involves an older Aboriginal female of about seventy, with white hair, asking me if I have seen her husband. In this case, the RAS gating is rather curious. I suspect that I was “seeing” a much older version of Zsuzsanna, though rendered as an unknown RAS character, especially as she asks where her husband is, though it may also be seen as random transpersonal communication with someone else’s unconsciousness.

Three Keys and the “Unfair Advantage”, from March 22, 2014. In this dream, I effortlessly transformed into a snake and back again, in other words, taking on the essence of RAS itself (very rare other than in apex lucidity at times). I eventually deliberately vivify my dream by opening a door; a large and difficult old wooden blue door, to such an extent that the vividness of the scene I stepped into seemed realistic beyond belief, even for me. It almost seemed as if I entered Alexander Siddig’s unconsciousness (though of course, unlike with Zsuzsanna, there is no way to validate this event). There have been other dreams with this implication.

In a dream I had shortly after my brother-in-law Bob’s mother died, I found myself approaching a door. I willed it open and was looking into an unfamiliar room. After time passed, I became aware that I might be intruding upon someone else’s privacy. Bob’s mother is sitting in an armchair, talking with her husband, who had also died. She approached the door while looking annoyed and slammed it in my face. (I had rarely ever even seen her in real life and this was my only dream of her.)

There are thousands of other dreams in which RAS mediation as a doorway scenario was a key factor of the waking precursor. Sometimes there is audio, including the knocking on a door or a door closing, depending upon which level of unconsciousness I am entering or leaving.

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Afternoon of February 1, 2018. Thursday.



It begins like this. A person gets undressed for bed. Perhaps he or she sits or lies in bed for a time, while undressed, before going to sleep. Perhaps they watch television or talk on the telephone while undressed in bed in their preparation to go to sleep. They might think about recent social encounters as they sit or lie in bed, while preparing for sleep, while undressed. Later, they might have a dream of being undressed, perhaps in public, and then after waking, wonder “what it could mean”. Still, it is neither my place nor purpose to make light of society’s unfathomable buffoonery and shortsightedness in my public dream journal.

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This entry focuses mainly on first-level dream state indicators. In this case, beds, bed sheets, and pillows are the focus as a reference entry to link (viable dream journal websites only, as on other sites it will just remain as a singular post).

Because dream state indicators of this nature occur in over twenty percent of my dreams, which I consider as quite natural and obvious, I have created this no-brainer reference entry for people who might otherwise puzzle over what this or that means in my dream journal. Still, there are specific threads of meaning depending on when and how a dream state indicator is rendered, especially if it is separate from other elements. (For example, although I often fly with a bed sheet as a “cloak” or “cape”, a bed as a flight symbol is uncommon.)

A bed could easily serve as either induction symbolism or waking transition symbolism. I do not consider it as pure autosymbolism since I relate autosymbolism as non-literal factors within the dream state (even though liminal space symbolism is analogically literal to real-life liminal space settings). For example, a bed in a parking lot (as I have actually dreamt a few times) would be a dream state indicator rendered into liminal space autosymbolism, even though this is a form of composite redundancy, where both factors, bed and parking lot, are indicative of being between dreaming and waking.

When I was very young, I used to see dream state indicators as a minimal form of RAS mediation (even serving to subliminally ground me to my real environment) to remind my dream self that my physical body is unconscious. In a way, that is still true, though I tend to see it more as a biological factor that carries over into the dream state, as impressions of one’s real environment often carry over into the dream state, especially the tactile nature of pillows and bed sheets. Even so, it could also just be a residual subliminal memory of having fallen asleep (assuming a deeper state of unconsciousness where environmental factors are not as influential).

I have often used a bed sheet or blanket to cover my body (when otherwise nude) in both lucid and non-lucid flying dreams (and certainly not because of modesty, as who cares about modesty in the dream state, but because of the realism of certain environmental factors in dreams, such as twigs and roof features). This validates that my dream self is aware of the status of my physical body, at least to a degree. Of course, in lucid dreams I do this on purpose, though in non-lucid dreams, it is a carryover factor, unrelated to waking life since the carryover is by habit of dream state awareness, not waking life focus. (One would assume this as obvious, but as I have learned, especially since 2013, empty-headedness, especially when it comes to understanding the dream state, is a dominant factor in many people.)

Pillows are in contrast to bed sheets as a dream state indicator in some dreams due to their association with vivid hypnagogia in childhood dreams. I saw pillows, mainly only those of one pale color, as a sort of hypnagogic “television” (even before I ever watched much television in reality.) By shifting my dream self’s gaze from pillow imagery to my dream’s much larger environment, I could vivify my dream and in contrast, by pulling the dream content in my dream’s larger environment “back” into my dream’s pillow, an implied threat becoming smaller and two-dimensional, restricted to the surface of my pillowcase, it became far less of an implied threat. This may be why I have rarely ever had significant nightmares other than singular examples when biologically premonitory.

Beds in unusual locations are as so, because a dream state indicator is typically unrelated to the rest of a dream’s content other than in the redundant example given above; bed in parking lot; though a bed in a lake is induction symbolism (as water is autosymbolism for entry into the dream state, and as a result, even a glass of water splashed in the face can vivify a dream).

There are times when dream state indicators of this kind are prescient, for example, in foreshadowing an illness. This includes cloaked figures (though not always) as a bed sheet or blanket association. There were two recent dreams about two of our sons, both related to them being in bed and somewhat tired, and both prior to a serious (though short-term) illness. One of these dreams included a cloaked figure of our youngest son’s height. However, such dreams also have a specific mood, which I hope to learn to hone in on to a more viable extent. Additionally, actually being tired in a dream (not necessarily being in bed) is an entirely different concept than just being in bed or seeing a bed incidentally, and usually indicates actual physical tiredness (at least for me).

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Afternoon of February 1, 2018. Thursday.



Until I began to develop a greater understanding of dreams at about age twelve (though I had long since viewed “dream dictionaries”, or any books or articles on a dream’s supposed meaning, as asinine), RAS mediation, especially in apex lucidity, was more likely to render an attacking dog as a waking alert factor than a snake. There is a specific reason for this. While a snake is probably the oldest waking trigger (and of which likely serves as such for the dreams of all primates), a dog has an autosymbolic association with an attempt to control the dream state. I began to naturally both lucid dream and attempt dream state manipulation as a toddler and recognized the aggressive dog autosymbolism by around age eight, including in a later dream from 1970 where I shouted “You dogs are always ruining my dreams” when I was in an extremely clear state of apex lucidity. This caused the dog to teleport (ironically at my unintentional command) to trigger waking with the hypnopompic lower back jab event (the dog’s hard nose pressing into the small of my back). This is solely due to the “obedience” factor. It serves as a metaphor for the dream being obedient for the dreamer as would a dog for its owner. The main problem with this is that dreams are of a biological process and full biological control of one’s mind is inherently limited, not only by current biological needs (such as a need to use a toilet) and environmental factors, but by circadian rhythms. It is not the “subconscious” (as in popular myth) that has anything to do with this, but RAS.

It was common for a dog, usually black or rust-colored, often a Labrador, to be rendered as a potential dream state terminator in early childhood. However, over time, as I mastered RAS mediation to a certain point in the 1980s with hundreds of experiments, it is rare for a dog to be an attack factor in my dreams.

None of this has any relevance to waking life. I never held or maintained any fear of dogs and had never experienced negative encounters with dogs in my childhood. In truth, as with most of my focus on dream study for over fifty years, it is my natural connection to the dream state and awareness of its meanings that is the key factor. People do not seem to understand, since oneironautics is a main aspect of my dream experience since earliest memory in both lucid and non-lucid dreams (the latter by lifelong conditioning), that the symbolism relates to the nature of the dream state itself, not waking life, other than when prescient.

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Afternoon of February 1, 2018. Thursday.



“A Carport as Liminal Space” also links to this entry. The only potential difference relates to my personal history in mostly living in houses with large enclosed front porches in contrast to one house, in Cubitis, with a large carport by which access to both the front yard and backyard was inherent. (In contrast, the Rose Street apartment, on the second floor of a commercial building, with businesses on the first floor, only had a minimal public entry at the foot of the stairs.)

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“A Porch as Liminal Space” is one of my most common autosymbolic settings in the waking transition and has been as such since early childhood. A porch is autosymbolism for a specific level of unconsciousness, often rendered as the final setting in a dream when RAS mediation dominates the most. It is often triggered when my dream self, though often as a subliminal factor, wants to sustain the dream state (without viably remembering what a dream is), mainly as a RAS artefact from the otherwise lucid habit of “going outside” in childhood dreams due to it being a starting point for apex lucidity.

In many cases, I have utilized my understanding of autosymbolism in semi-lucidity to vivify my dream into astounding apex lucidity by using a porch as an “entry point”, though always in going outside (which makes the term “entry point” sound ambiguous even though it is not), and augmenting my dream into incredible clarity. This is because such autosymbolism is rendered while closer to the emergent consciousness factor (the same factor of which gives a subliminal cue to my dream self to attempt to sustain my dream). Unfortunately, it also means that RAS mediation is likely to dominate by rendering the preconscious as personified, which sometimes results in “intruder” dreams.

A porch represents liminal space regardless of which porch is rendered in my dream. Although my dream settings are always unique from dream to dream, there are cases where the porch of my present home is rendered in the last scene, though usually has a noticeable fictional aspect or different orientation (in conscious realization only, after waking). Sometimes the wrong porch is rendered with a particular previous home, or sometimes leads to a different location from where it did in real life.

As with certain other autosymbolic settings (excluding such as a bedroom or bathroom), there is no connection to waking life or the conscious self identity other than when prescience is a factor. In other words, it is inherent to the condition of being unconscious while subliminally seeking to sustain the dream state in preference to becoming conscious. This is why RAS mediation is most likely to dominate this setting in the final stage of a dream, typically by being at the entry point of the porch or becoming an intruder on the porch, as waking is a biological necessity. However, depending on biological or environmental factors, my dream self is sometimes allowed to use this setting as a dream state augmentation factor. Again, this is only utilized by going outside, as going inside would place me closer to a dream state indicator such as a bedroom or bathroom; a bedroom to remind me that my physical body is asleep and thus cannot stay as such forever and a bathroom to remind me of the eventually inescapable biological need to use a toilet.

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A full understanding of this setting and its autosymbolic nature has brought me closer to mastering many levels of the dream state, even in non-lucidity.

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Morning of January 9, 2018. Tuesday.



This is part five of my prefatory series. It will only be viable (within a main index) on my main dream journal. So far, I have explained, as concisely as I could, four common dream components.

I have included hypnagogia and sleep paralysis in the same entry despite, in my own (apparently unique) experience; the two events are completely unrelated despite numerous articles I have read that link them together. For me, reading articles about hypnagogia or sleep paralysis is pointless and here is why:

People talk about “suffering” from sleep paralysis or hypnagogia, or that it “scares” them, which has never made any sense to me. They describe “dark figures”, “evil”, a malevolent presence, and so on as if they had some sort of tangibility or potential influence. Sorry people, this is something I have very limited experience with, even in tens of thousands of dreams in my over fifty years of study. There are exceptions, though these have been validated to mostly relate to biologically premonitory events or sometimes rare apnea caused by a combination of eating too close to the sleeping period and while sleeping on my back.

For me, if I find myself in sleep paralysis, I seek to embrace and enhance the experience. I do this by deliberately rolling my eyes up towards my forehead, which typically intensifies the perception of a loving entity being present and sometimes I am annoyed when I feel “she” is gone (though I never see her in this state). I sometimes hear a very pleasing humming sound (which I sometimes perceive as moving in a figure eight above me). I usually feel waves of pleasure moving through my body, from head to toe and back. Eventually, I usually, if I hold the state long enough, feel a rising sensation. I do not see any imagery while in sleep paralysis, I only have enhanced touch and sound, sometimes buzzing (even tangible lovemaking - female on top, especially one event with Zsuzsanna before I came to Australia to be with her). I also perceive in a completely different way than during hypnagogic sequences.

Now, I will go on to describe hypnagogia, which I also find very enjoyable. Since childhood, I like to remain in hypnagogia for at least an hour or more. During this time, which is always wholly lucid (and always had been, even as a toddler), I like to step into and out of dreams by way of conscious will, though I have to wait for the sequence to slow down. This is because when it first starts, it is very rapid, dream settings changing from more than one per second, though gradually becoming slower over time until it is a rate of about one setting every five seconds. Eventually, when it slows down to about ten seconds per change of setting, I step into a setting of my choice. I have done this since earliest memory and it is a very vivid and intriguing experience, but I never mistake it for being real in any way, though I do often slip into non-lucidity. (I did not realize that other people were not like this until I was about eighteen years old. I had read a little about it, mostly in dictionaries, but did not really read that many articles relating to this state. Imagine my surprise, especially when some people call it a “medical problem”. Much of the world is, sadly, very stupid.)

Most feasible settings in hypnagogia are vivid and colorful outdoor settings. This includes beautiful forests with rivers, lakes, and waterfalls (which I have viewed on a day-to-day basis all my life), neighborhoods with interesting houses, farmyards, train stations, and so on. Sometimes it is a beautiful underwater scene (such as coral or sea fans and various species of fish), which I most often just watch without entering (even though I can breathe underwater in the dream state). Sometimes the settings will seem to rapidly shake from side to side, slowly dissolve, to be replaced by some sort of grid or abstract pattern (typically like leaves floating in water and quivering) before becoming a different setting. Such an event usually only occurs once or twice in a sleeping period. For example, in one instance when I was a young boy, I was watching chickens walk around in a farmyard, some of them pecking at the ground (this was before my father decided to change our rabbit farm into a chicken farm). As I continued to view the scene, there was a very subtle roaring sensation and a sort of fizzing effect, and leaf-like patterns that replaced the setting after it quivered side to side (with no actual movement on my part, that is, no movement of my physical body or perceived movement of my dream self).

This is only one form of hypnagogia. Other types are too surreal to view as a legitimate place to “enter”. Curiously, zooming in or out, and longer panning sequences, as seen in movies, had never occurred in my dreams until I had watched television for the first time. To me, this is a very important realization. It tells me that watching television or movies creates a very profound change in the nature of perception. I have never read of anyone else facing up to this fact. This is ironic, in that hypnagogia itself rarely presented anything I had ever seen in waking life, which ultimately convinced me that something else was going on, though I am still not sure what.

Other forms of this state vary. For example, there is a state where I coalesce with other figures, typically only experiencing bliss or an amazing sensation. Glowing human forms (of different implied ages) jump into my chest, making me feel healthier or more vibrant.

There is a state where dream characters also rapidly change, yet while the setting is fully stable, sometimes faster than once per second (which has served as a reinduction trigger in stabilizing lucidity if it has faded, when I begin to become aware of this after about ten minutes).

In still another state, dream characters seem very odd. They may be only half-formed, or they walk around and phase through bushes or walls and sometimes get stuck.

In other states, I am able to summon (solely through automatic expectation) whatever vivid experience I choose. This is typically coalescence with other entities and is always a satisfying energizing experience, and is always near a body of water (such as a river, lake, waterfall, water park, campground, or swimming pool) usually in daylight. I sometimes marvel at the beauty of the water as the surface reflects certain patterns yet simultaneously reveals what is under the surface. As such, I may jump in and out of numerous dreams (at the rate of about one per minute or more) of this nature in about an hour.

Due to how I am apparently different from most people in this way, this particular entry is probably of no use to people who “suffer” from their dreams or dream states. Why am I different? On the one hand, I was a ten-month baby instead of a nine-month baby. While my mother “almost bled to death” giving birth (according to reports), she very quickly recovered. On the other hand, some people have claimed it is related to healing myself after my accident as a toddler when I nearly lost my left hand (when a large shard from a broken mug sliced through my wrist and out the side of my forearm). The nerves and tendons were supposedly too damaged (and reconnected incorrectly in surgery) to ever work again. Somehow though, after I willed myself to gain use of my hand (while both awake and sleeping), the nerves and tendons, even though they had been connected wrongly, began to work to where my hand had full use (with no difference in how I perceived which fingers I was moving as might be expected). Whether or not my deliberate healing of myself through different levels of consciousness changed how I became more aware of other levels of consciousness and their symbolic dynamics, remains unsolved, but it does make sense, as I am typically aware of what dream symbolism is representing as it is occurring, something that most people do not seem able to understand.

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Morning of January 9, 2018. Tuesday.



So far, in my prefatory series, I have provided “Known Key Symbolism 2018: Common Liminal Space Settings (1)” and “Known Key Symbolism 2018: Dream State Indicators”.

I hope I have made it clear so far, of what I understand (and have often validated) from over fifty years of dream study. Due to the fact that many people only remember a few of their dreams (or none at all), they like to infuse “meaning” (that is, meaning not related to either the biological or the spiritual nature of unconsciousness or the dream state and waking transition itself, as well as no acknowledgement of literal dream threads including prescience) into what few dreams are recalled. Many people do not actually understand what lucidity is (or how it works) and consequently use the term loosely and incorrectly. They also (almost relentlessly) fail to see how someone like me typically recalls five to nine non-lucid dreams a day (minimum of three), not including the virtually limitless hypnagogic sequences (of which are wholly lucid) at the beginning of every normal sleeping period. As a cop-out, some people will say, “oh, but a few dreams have meaning and importance, but most others do not”, which is kind of like saying, “oh, sometimes the stomach’s digestion of food is important, other times, when the stomach digests food, nothing is happening and the stomach is not even there”. Many people fail to understand that dreams can be fully controlled (either with lucid or non-lucid dream self perception) and even purposely formed from one idea (including for healing purposes and unfathomable levels of bliss and joy), and the more one studies and understands what dreams mean, the more natural clarity of mind automatically develops, resulting in virtually no nightmares (unless biologically premonitory) or even disturbing dreams. Still, RAS (the Reticular Activating System) and I have had a love-hate relationship since early childhood, based on whether or not I wanted to sleep and dream longer or typically whether there was environmental noise or not, these factors completely irrelevant to “interpretation” or waking life.

People like to over-dramatize and systematically “answer questions” even where none exist in the way they are implying. They like to infuse another person’s dream with negative context even when there is none. They like to pretend there is conflict or major issues to “solve”. They like to pretend that the dynamically fictional dream self (personified subconscious) is the same as the current conscious self identity, even when there is no evidence of viable memory or even common sense on the part of the very limited temporary dream self.

Everyone else I have ever known of (writings of the public that is), in virtually everything I have ever read about dreams since childhood, confuses RAS mediation with the so-called subconscious. This is probably why the bizarre belief that “my subconscious is trying to tell me something” came about. The inability to discern RAS mediation from the generic subconscious is unusual, but to be expected in the public’s limited understanding.

It goes without saying that the dream self in non-lucid dreams can only be the personified subconscious (or the “subconscious itself”). Being that the subconscious band has no concept of time or space (or any viable intelligence or consistent memory) unless conscious self identity threads (certain active neural patterns) are extant, how can the subconscious “solve an issue”? (Many people tend to confuse “subconscious” with “unconscious”.) Since this is the case, where does the dominant preconscious come from? (Confusion also results from many systems using “preconscious” and “subconscious” as synonyms when they are very different bands, at least in my extensive work.) RAS comes in to mediate sleep-wake transitions, and such symbolism inherently reflects the nature of waking from the dream state. This is biological fact, not some sort of half-baked theory or popular superstition. More so, understanding RAS is what eventually creates the potential for consciously controlling the dream state (though not one hundred percent as waking is a biological necessity - though there are people who have an eerie degree of control over their heart rate), something many people cannot seem to grasp at all, because many people see dreams as some sort of inexplicable mental event that they need to “interpret”, yet with zero interest in actually understanding anything.

For review, to integrate what I have written in this prefatory set thus far:

Again, I have confidently stated, with certainty developed for over fifty years, that liminal space symbols are directly related to the waking transition and have no need for “interpretation” due to their inherent nature of representing and symbolizing, in real time, the space between dreaming and waking. (Again, I will also remind people that this association is literal when linked to real life perception. That is, a porch, a parking lot, and a store’s checkout are also liminal spaces in real life. I only chose those three for now, as they are the most common liminal space symbols in my own dreams, sometimes occurring several times a week and for over fifty years.)

Again, I emphasize that dream state indicators are based on residual subliminal memory of having fallen asleep and consequently usually have no need for “interpretation”. Dream state indicators naturally occur in my dreams more often than not, though I typically do not go into detail about them in singular dream posts.

Again, I emphasize that, on a basic level, liminal space symbols and dream state indicators are unrelated within the dream state and are two completely different processes (just as in waking life, as an example, thoughts about finishing an essay and recent memories about your girlfriend are inherently unrelated, a result of two completely different mental processes occurring at the same time), yet can be a part of the same dream sequence. They may also be integrated within dreams with additional meaning (of which is closer to waking life patterns or personal meaning), even prescient threads, yet in a way that may not be cohesive, which is why many people might be inclined to completely ignore such events or features or mistakenly “interpret” everything as a whole.

At this point, I will address the failure of people to understand that conflict in the dream state may be based solely on RAS mediation and have no viable connection to waking life conflict or internal conflict assuming any even exists in the first place. It is ironic how people refuse to understand RAS mediation (misunderstanding it as the subconscious this or subconscious that) and try to infuse negative context where there is more opportunity for positive affirmation and assertiveness or true understanding of one’s own mind (the most important factor that could exist in life).

RAS mediation in its raw mode likes to generate snakes as the waking alert, probably because this is a key factor of primate fear (and I am willing to bet that snakes are a common factor in the dreams of all primates). Ten different people have ten different dreams about snakes around the same time, and all one needs to do is sit back and watch the nonsense concerning “interpretation” or “meaning” and have no choice but to roll their eyes.

The thread of RAS mediation is likely to be that which chases (or intrudes upon) the dreamer, whether or not someone is trying to “escape” from something in reality or has any issues of conflict when awake. “Wake up and get out of bed before you wet yourself” may be the sole “interpretation” of RAS intrusion into the dream (or it may be an unknown or unexpected environmental noise that threads of the emergent consciousness become vaguely concerned about - for example, arguments between people we do not know, but who had been walking down the street early in the morning near our house, have intruded into my dreams and changed the symbolism, which of course has nothing to do with my conscious self identity or even unconscious essence). Whether or not I have conflict in waking life is unrelated to how RAS mediates my dream other than incidentally. I could use my dream to punch someone I do not like, and at least provide some “relief”, but does that really address any hope for an “answer”? I think not. Some people, for example bullies, religious zealots, or people who believe the world is flat, simply cannot be “solved”. The longer someone keeps a dream journal (though one must actually pay attention), the more obvious it becomes. There is a very clear difference between the nature of different dream state components, which I have vividly noticed since early childhood, all of that and inexplicable prescience as well.

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Afternoon of January 9, 2018. Tuesday.



Three common waking space settings (in my fifty years of dreaming history since earliest memory) are as follows:

Porch

Parking Lot

Store checkout

(There are many more, which I will provide information on in future entries.)

The fallacy of “interpretation” (often incorrectly referred to as “meaning”) works like this: A random member of society (even an “expert” or “professional”), who almost always lacks the understanding of what a dream actually is (or what is occurring unconsciously), will see one of these three settings and pretend it has a concurrent meaning related to real life, in the pretense of nebulously “indicating” something about real life. That would be a good trick since the above settings have occurred on a regular basis in my dreams for over fifty years, typically in the last segment of a dream sequence.

When rendered as settings in a dream, these elements are typically symbolic of the dream state itself and the waking transition, and as such, often have nothing to do with “interpretation” or waking life. I know this from having continuously studied my dreams for over fifty years. There is no doubt in my mind, especially as I am aware of my own dream self and its viewpoints as I move through such waking transitions, with the actual understanding (though subtle) at one level, of what I am experiencing. That is, I am otherwise (though vaguely) lucid enough in waking space to understand the symbolism. (For some reason, just as with other common factors of my dreams, the majority of other people do not seem to experience this. Consequently, from a very young age, I have believed that much of society is either missing a major part of the thinking process, or, using the example of mathematics; people simply are not interested or consider it too difficult or unfamiliar.)

To quote (verbatim), the first text that comes up on Google with a search relating to liminal space: “Liminal spaces, such as waiting rooms, parking lots, stairwells and rest stops, make you feel weird if you spend too much time in them because these spaces exist for the things that come before or after them. Their ‘existence’ is not about themselves.” However, this is not entirely true. In contrast, “The Beach as a Liminal Space” (chapter 28 of “A Companion to Tourism”) and “Porches and the vocabulary of liminal spaces” (Ruth Walker) relate the positive factors.

“In anthropology, liminality is the quality of ambiguity or disorientation that occurs in the middle stage of rituals.” (Wikipedia.) Certainly, a dream could be viewed as a type of ritual in its waking process and the symbolism that represents the waking process, as a person is between dreaming and waking. This is what such symbolism actually means in contrast to the belief it has an “interpretation”.

Are there specific differences in meaning regarding whether my dream ends on a porch, in a parking lot, or at a store’s checkout? Is it just incidental to the nature of being unconscious and the mind trying to make sense of the shifts in unconsciousness during the sleep cycle? The only time I have validated any sort of connection is when my dream has a prescient thread as such. (Still, prescient threads are most commonly linked to the known symbolism of the dream state itself, something I have found peculiar since childhood.)

I could note that, while a parking lot is often considered an open space (excluding enclosed or multi-storey car parks), a porch and a store’s checkout are usually enclosed spaces. (A carport, originating in my dreams from the years I lived in Cubitis, also represents typical waking process symbolism, especially when that house’s door was used as my dream’s liminal space divider or purposeful exit point, though a carport is more open than a typical porch.) However, the dream state perception (irresolvable by my conscious self) sometimes presents the essence of being indoors and outdoors at the same time, which is different than when I feel the essence of bilocation based on setting dynamics. Even so, this ambiguity so present (and dominating) in some dreams does not occur at all in other dreams. It depends on which neural patterns are active in the waking process.

A store’s checkout as a preparatory symbol in leaving the dream state has an additional factor in some cases. Such a waking process is sometimes more focused (depending on my dream) than other waking transitions. For example, it sometimes has the additional feature of a wallet, which symbolizes the transition of the temporary fictional dream self coalescing back into the conscious self during the RAS mediation (as the cashier can be understood to represent the preconscious in such a scenario), because a wallet “holds identification”. However, porch scenarios also often include RAS mediation or a dominant preconscious “intrusion” (though not in every case, as it depends on the stage of the sleep cycle and whether it is the first or last dream). A parking lot, other than in certain childhood dreams, is less likely to have RAS mediation, resulting in a less dynamic waking process. All three settings occur in different stages of sleep, which validates their connection to the dream state itself in most cases (again, other than when there is a prescient thread).

There are also forms of liminal space of which are perceived as mobile, in which case vestibular system symbolism links to the RAS mediation, which may depend on sleeping position, though is typically more about temporarily ambiguous perception of the physical body while unconscious (especially as the dream self does not have a real physical body). For example, an elevator would be a waking process symbol, though as with other types of liminal space settings, it can also serve as induction (as it is deliberately used in some forms of meditation and hypnosis as such), that is, deeper into the dream state and sustaining it while also vivifying it.

In other entries (at least on my main site), I will go into more detail about known symbolism (of which I am absolutely certain about). I will relate more about how I have been able to understand most aspects of my dreams and sleeping anomalies since childhood, though still present alternate possibilities when they might feasibly (that is, intelligently) exist.

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Afternoon of August 4, 2015. Tuesday.



I will open this entry with a recent very vivid and somewhat disturbing dream (on some levels).

“Spaghetti Brain”

Morning of August 2, 2015. Sunday.

I am in my present home on W Street and I notice my youngest son sleeping on his left side on the floor. His head is encased in a glass aquarium filled with water. As I look more closely, I notice that the area where his hair would normally be is fleshy (though somewhat hollow) and that there are strands of (cooked) “living spaghetti” moving about in the water (somewhat worm-like) as if related to some sort of breathing function. At times, though, the “spaghetti” is much sparser and this seems cause for concern. I also see a small piece of macaroni at times (mostly above where his ears would otherwise be), which vaguely reminds me of some sort of tiny worm. He does not seem to be in distress though I still worry about whether or not this is normal. I seem more concerned when there is the least spaghetti “swimming” about and moving down and through some sort of organic structure near his neck. As vivid and surreal (and bizarre) this imagery is, I do not become lucid at any point. I continue to have deep concern about his well-being, but there does not seem to actually be anything wrong. I get the impression that there is not as much active “spaghetti” because he is in a deep sleep.

My above dream probably relates to seeing myself in the form of my son and puzzling about the nature of consciousness and still not becoming lucid in this case. It also correctly shows the nature of my consciousness in sleep (spaghetti becoming sparser in there being less critical thinking on hand).

“‘Eat me…eat me…’ and animated birds” (July 6, 1985) caught me in sleep paralysis which is normally pleasant, though this was not. A box of Kraft macaroni and cheese “dances” and rattles in the air near my head and screams “eat me eat me eat me” as I try to cover my head with my pillow. I have updated this entry with my interpretation, so am linking this particular one in this entry.

“Tornado Encounter” (November 24, 2014) has the tornado turning my old neighborhood in La Crosse into large strands of cooked spaghetti (rather than the expected debris of wood and glass and such). It also replaces the one block of Loomis Street with a bridge (not that elevated), the only time a dream has created this alteration of the setting. There is an additional concept that ties in with the Disney animated movie “Lady and the Tramp”. Even though I had updated “Tornado Encounter” fairly recently, there is still more in the decoding. The scene causes me to think of when the two dogs end up kissing accidentally due to both picking up and sucking in the same strand of spaghetti (a scene I saw numerous times as a child in television commercials). So, in knowing that a tornado is the bottom half of the Merkaba and that spaghetti is related to extensions of mental energies, this dream is showing me that I need to “pick up the strand of spaghetti” and wake up to be with my soulmate (as the “old neighborhood” is gone) so I can kiss her and not wander about in dreams so much other than when becoming lucid and seeking higher states and real knowledge (rather than conjecture). Now that I know what spaghetti lying about anywhere means, I am thus prepared.

“The Legend of Tony Karoni” (June 27, 1976), though not related to a pasta theme, does include the surname “Karoni”, naturally causing me to think of macaroni (as well as “mac” being another word for a man whose name is unknown). There also seems to be some sort of play on the idea of a “spaghetti western” (though in fact, it is supposedly called a “macaroni western” primarily in Japan). “Needle’s cell” in fact, may be a deliberate play on brain cells, this dream being about a month before my surgery on my right thumb and wrist, which is related to much of how I interpreted it at the time.

“As the Worm Turns” (May 17, 2014), which was “dream of the day” on one site on Monday, August 3, 2015, also had implications of macaroni being close to the head (and even inside the brain - taking me back to someone who was making jokes about “brain worms” regarding raisins in muffins at my father’s wake and where I just sat gasping and giggling foolishly at his audacity). In this case, the supposed “killer worms”, in dying, fall out of my hair as seemingly uncooked elbow macaroni (in a very vivid perspective). This also relates to my own conscious energy not being in my dream as I am not lucid. The potential though unacknowledged and uncontrolled “mental energies” are the worms in this case and become macaroni prior to my waking since I had not used the energies for apex lucidity. The likely play on “showing your feathers” in this dream is probably sarcasm from the Source (or a wayward orphaned tulpa) based on the line "stuck a feather in his cap and called it macaroni”.

Additionally, the “Tornadopillar” dream (April 3, 1982) brings to mind a dream, “The Great 'God’ Worm” (April 4, 1992) where the Merkaba is huge (appearing, in fact, as the total essence of god) and appears as a giant albino glass-like earthworm, “spinning” into my forehead like a tornado force after spending time with my wife-to-be at the top of a truncated staircase (which also seemed to be in a “divine” portmanteau setting including restaurant and observatory).

In conclusion, macaroni and spaghetti represent the energies of the human brain. The link to caterpillars and earthworms is also relevant due to their visual similarities. The difference is that caterpillars “ascend” in becoming butterflies (“lower” mental energies into ascension with soulmate union) and in contrast, the earthworm can be either microcosm or macrocosm (in either digging deep or “digging as high as possible” in the “god-like” Palouse earthworm form - or great white worm, which unfortunately is associated with the devil in some schools of thought).

There. I am glad I got this all sorted out. Thank you for reading.