• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views




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    Non-Lucid Dreams

    1. lxxii.

      by , 01-26-2020 at 01:26 PM
      Two dreams, turned mostly into fragments after getting up from bed. I think there was a third one, but I must have forgotten it.


      Dream Fragment 1:

      I don't know where I was, it wasn't a familiar place at all, but there was some kind of square and a market. There was a town or city feel to the place and I remember it was day time, although everything looked a bit dark or murky somehow.

      There was this woman with blonde-ish hair and a fit look (V) whom I know online from a game, though I've never met her in person. She was showing me around? I remember her grabbing me, by the arm or hand and for some reason in the dream this made me visibly uncomfortable. V noticed and asked me what was wrong or whatever. I explained that where I was originally from, physical interaction even with strangers was commonplace, but since I have been living elsewhere for some years now, I had sort of become estranged from the feeling and it was a confusing situation somehow.

      Next thing I remember is something about a big cruise ship. I went down some steps, avoiding a queue for said ship, with no interest at all in getting on, having passing thoughts about a waste of time it looked like, due to how crowded it seemed like it was going to be.

      There is then a transition of some kind.

      Dream Fragment 2:


      I remember being with H. We're on the road, H is driving; it looks like the type of countryside I'd expect to find here. It was day time, but the sun was close-ish to the horizon, I think more setting than rising, and it was also cloudy. Everything looked a bit desaturated.

      There is a transition and now we're at some sort of lodge. My mom and my dad are there and we're having a look around. Nobody else is around, and the place is littered with what I can only describe as cultural artefacts from many different places. For some reason I take no particular interest in them however. I remember my parents talking, probably with me, but don't remember the content of the conversation.

      There are stairs that go up and next thing I know, I find myself going through several upper levels of this lodge. One of my siblings (L) is here and we are both going up the stairs up to a point when we're not inside the house anymore, and it's a cliff. There are still steps, made of rough and weathered stone. As we go up the steps, the incline gets sharper, and this random girl with a massive backpack is also climbing these steps. At first I get past her but as I get nearer a flat bit at the top of these steps, she overtakes me.

      Next thing I know, I expect to be at the flat bit and that there would be more to climb. I expect that the cliff on the other side would be gentle based on what I felt the formation was like, but no. This was the peak, and it was like a sharp peak.

      Up here, there was a large but flat rock, on which L sat in a precarious way as always and I could see lots of things below, fields, towns, other mountains. I felt the height we were at was impossibly high for the amount of climbing we'd done, but my legs were shaking and I felt giddy from my irrational fear of heights. At first L tried to get my attention so I wouldn't look down, but that didn't last long. I remember seeing parts of this mountain we were on, looking toward the left. There were large and ancient man-shaped stones along certain parts of the ridges, almost like steps but which were really more like foundations for fortifications.

      I couldn't let go of the rough stone steps. The way the flat bit of rock was connected meant that there was an extremely narrow part of dirt or rock and I just felt it was risky to try and get there. I wanted to go back down and eventually I did. I remember being at the main part of that lodge again, but the rest of the dream is missing.


      Some notes:


      • V looked exactly as I would have expected but though we had some conversation, I have no idea what her voice was like, or if it was accurate.
      • H's presence in the second dream was quite short, but so was the presence of my parents and the random girl that was doing the climb too.
      • When I was at the peak of that mountain, there was a cold feel to being there, although I don't remember actually feeling cold. But everything was quite bright, it was clear and sunny and I enjoyed that on some level, but the sort of physical stress I was feeling due to the fear of heights made the experience remind me of several situations in my childhood.
      • During that part of the dream where I was climbing, I remember clearly thinking; "I'm sure I've dreamt of a climb like this". In actual reality, I don't think I have had a dream like that before, but again, the experience was similar to some I had in my childhood.
    2. lxxi.

      by , 01-26-2020 at 03:07 AM
      Remembered this fragment much more clearly earlier on but wasn't able to write it until now.


      Dream Fragment:

      Was in Wintergrasp from WoW; I remember the snow on the ground felt a bit "real" and I think the atmosphere was a bit more blue-ish than it probably ever was in reality. The battle was going to begin in just over a minute and the place was more deserted than I expected; but as the timer finished the place was crowded. For some reason I got teleported to a cave like the starting cave from AV and likewise there was a large metal gate in the same style. I could clearly see outside was still WG however, and I was going to be defending. I remember the gate opening but some details are missing now between this part and the next.

      The next part I remember is next to one of the east walls of the fortress. I remember fighting outside the walls for a bit but can't remember exactly what class I was playing; either a warrior or a death knight with a two-handed weapon.

      I got on one of the rocket turrets mounted along the east wall and pointed it quite directly at a few enemy players fighting some of ours on the ground below. I was mostly aiming at one of the sloped areas, where most of the fighting was taking place. I don't remember seeing the siege vehicles at this point. I can remember seeing the characters in much clearer detail than would be possible in-game, especially when this area was current content - I think there was a mix of horde and alliance in the enemy forces.

      I remember during the dream I was feeling a bit of allure (pre-lucid?) towards the player characters in general as I could see them in quite clear detail.


      Edit, some side notes:

      Back in WLK I did play death knight, warrior and paladin classes a lot, the latter two especially compared to the previous expansion and the original game where I mostly just played rogue.
      Though the snow had a more real quality to it, as I could sort of feel it crunch like it would if it was fairly deep, nothing else about the environment seemed more realistic.
      The focus I took on the player character models is not uncharacteristic of something I would do when actually playing anyway, as I always liked seeing the different equipment on all the characters, but in this case it felt different because the characters I took more note of felt like they were “zoomed in”, in terms of detail. I remember I had felt it was odd/different.

      Updated 01-26-2020 at 03:24 AM by 95293

      Categories
      non-lucid , memorable , dream fragment , side notes
    3. lxx.

      by , 01-21-2020 at 04:24 PM
      The first fragment was from yesterday, I remembered more yesterday but didn't have a chance to make note of it. The other two were from today; lost most of the dreams' information due to how the morning went.



      Dream Fragment 1:


      Something about four commanders. Was supposed to meet them? Not sure. Dream took place in some concrete parking lot type structure.

      Dream Fragment 2:

      Taking a bus, it didn't look like a normal bus and only me and someone else were in it (H?), no driver, that I can remember. We got out just before a road intersection. There was a church-like building to the right, across the road, but in the dream I knew this was in the context of a university campus or something; there were a few buildings but it mostly seemed like a village area more than anything. It was quiet outside, it was day time.

      Dream Fragment 3:

      Possibly related to the previous fragment. Cooking or preparing food whilst inside a train, but generally darker than the previous fragment. I remember distant cliffs at a lower altitude but nothing specific other than a generally arid landscape. Vague memory of desaturated blue tones. Sort of day time but not very bright.
    4. lxix.

      by , 01-18-2020 at 01:11 PM
      Dream Fragment:

      I was at my old home or some version of it. I was at the entrance hall and it was a bit dark but still daytime, suggesting it was the time just before sunset. H was there, but H looked like this actress from a TV show instead. She was crouched up in the middle of the room, in front of the dark stained wardrobe and I crouched next to H and started to cuddle, giving her a kiss and feeling how different her body was compared to what I should remember.

      There is a transition and I'm outside, it's daytime but probably more around noon now. I remember walking by a few places that were altered from how they should be, namely D's building and its entrance. There were quite a few people there and I remember making small talk for some reason, but no idea what about.

      I kept wandering the streets of my home town and eventually after going through a few streets that don't exist and a wall turning into an open street, I started to become sort of pre-lucid and gained some dream-control, not consciously thinking about it. There was a square or plaza of some kind, surrounded by short two or three story buildings, as expected, and people were just going about their business. But I wanted to feel alone and solemn in this place for some reason, so I snapped my fingers and most of them disappeared. A woman and her young boy didn't.

      I snapped again, wanting rid of her from the scene. She wouldn't go. She walked up to me and started becoming antagonistic and asking why I wanted her to go. I didn't explain myself (perhaps I didn't know why either) and I eventually conceded and said "fine, if you won't leave, then I will", so I walked away across the plaza and into a small tunnel lit with fluorescent lights and as I did, she paced up quickly behind me, pushing me against a corner, hurting me, and twisting my right arm and gripping my bottom.

      She said something that I can't remember word for word, which basically summed up to be about how I often am careless with caressing and cuddling H (making me cause pain by complete accident), and despite the pain she was inflicting on purpose, I laughed at its irony. In that moment, I felt a dire need to go to the bathroom, and I falsely woke up, then getting up from bed and going to the bathroom, and just as I sat on the toilet, I was in bed again, as if that was only imagined, but the urge to use the bathroom was suddenly gone.

      Then I woke up truly and double checked how I felt, realising it was all just very realistic dream sensation.


      Some notes:


      • This dream wasn't particularly vivid in terms of visual clarity but the physical sensations were quite strong overall.
      • The woman who wouldn't go was some sort of anima manifestation. Often it isn't so antagonistic but her look was distinct from previous appearances, mostly marked by her shoulder-long hair being black this time. Her face was more chiselled, too. It was simply a more raw and aggressive look in general; ironically enough, what I would expect from my home region.
      • Though I had some dream control, it was completely non-lucid. I could feel myself having some sort of pre-lucid thoughts but they didn't rise up enough for me to start gaining lucidity.
      • The woman's young boy reminded me of myself when I was younger, but his role in the dream seemed to be minimal. He seemed to be there pretty much just to characterise the woman as a mother, as he pretty much just went off playing in the street without a care for what was happening.
    5. lxviii.

      by , 01-16-2020 at 01:52 PM
      I've been having a somewhat better dream recall average than I normally would, but haven't been taking note of dreams enough and my last DJ here was ages ago now. This is a particularly memorable dream fragment from this week.



      Dream Fragment:


      First half is missing.

      Was in my home city, or some altered version of it. It was day time and I was heading home on foot; there was a fluid transition to my arrival home but I've forgotten the detail of it, and when I got there it was dark at that point. My dad was in his car and approached me and told me to get in the car so we could go somewhere (for a meal or something?) - I was a bit reluctant, I was feeling in pain and really tired; mom was sat at the back with one of my brothers (T) and one of my cousins (R) was sat at the front, so I sat next to mom.

      Dad started driving and very shortly after, we were going through some surreal highway that I've seen in some other dream fairly recently; surrounded by cliffs and 10-story buildings on top of the cliffs. It then turned into a rock and dirt road and there were dark abysses either side of the road, with more cliffs in the distance. I was a bit apprehensive too, but mom was starting to get quite worried and told dad, in the same way as I ever expect.

      He reassured her with a smile, saying: "It's fine, I've driven on these roads loads of times!". Very shortly after he said that, we went over a bump in the road, but there was nothing on the other side. The car fell straight into one of those abysses, none of us seemingly very concerned by this, plunging into water at the bottom.

      At first we didn't try to get out; I remember thinking "Well it doesn't really matter" but eventually we all got out and swam up. When we got to the surface of the water, some sort of root-like things descended toward us and took us to a sort of rocky area under a much bigger floating mass of rock.

      At the centre of this area there was some sort of little shop. I remember going in and seeing all these small 4:3 CRT TV screens, each one no bigger than my head, sat on shelves, almost perfectly spaced apart. Each one of the screens had a landscape view in it, like a live feed, but not much was going on in any of them. It was a colourful shelf to look at.

      As I walked along this narrow path between these big metal shelves with the TVs, something caught my attention on top of one shelf. A moonstone, but not as bright and vivid or even opalescent like one I actually have in reality. The gem was pale and sort of a sepia or cream colour but it was still slightly translucent as expected. What was odd about it was that it was encrusted with some sort of gold filigree and small golden spheres.

      Start to remember less detail at this point. I remember dad went off his own way and so did my sibling and cousin. Mom stayed with me and we went outside, where it was still dark, although the direct area around wherever we went was always seemingly lit. More like the darkness was a fog made of black.

      I remember seeing some bones or dead plants and noticing the floor was particularly arid. Eventually we found some building thing, which was very square. It had a brand new kitchen I think, but apart from that it was mostly just dark corridors. I don't remember anything after that point.


      A note:
      I remember that in the dream the surreal landscapes felt familiar but out of place. Although I did not get anywhere near being lucid, I've had more of these moments lately where I'll have pre-lucid thoughts or recognition of a feature from a past dream.
    6. lxvii.

      by , 11-09-2018 at 01:52 PM
      Non-dream stuff - Haven't been so well last couple of days and sleep has been irregular too. Been waking up at normal times but then falling back asleep for too long. Remember some fragments but nearly no detail. Some visual details I remember I just can't put into words very well either.



      Dream Fragment 1:
      Something about some furries, in a town. One of them grew a bit bigger and because of that something happened (like some guy reacted and locked down an area or something?). I remember the group sitting together at a table somewhere, feeling sad.

      Dream Fragment 2:
      Was back at university. Rest of context has completely vanished as I tried to recall more...

      Dream Fragment 3:
      Me and my mom were listening to someone from the US speak on television or something. My mom asked what he was saying. I said "He's... Reading from the book of Apocalypse."

      Dream Fragment 4:
      Some long non-lucid that I don't remember much about anymore, but the dream plot was in some sort of old castle or something and I was going around it with other people. My now waking mind is coming up with Karazhan as a location associated to this dream.



      No notes at the moment, I'm just too tired.
    7. lxvi.

      by , 11-06-2018 at 12:35 PM
      Non-dream stuff - Woke up about 3 times through the morning, between 8:20, the time for my alarm, then at 9 something then at 10:20. Some long-ish dreams but think they've fragmented.



      Fragment 1:
      At a square or cathedral. There with partner (H), something to do with pipe organs.

      Then outside, at the square. Nice cobbles and layout. Remember meeting up with my parents and having them ask why I didn't have a stand here selling old coins; I remember explaining that I'd worked out that the cost to make them look new, plus the cost to rent the space, plus other things I don't remember now, meant that it was far too expensive and not worth it at all. I also remember explaining that I didn't have nearly enough coins to make it worthwhile.

      Then at some version of my childhood home with my parents. At the rear balcony of the flat. Things look blocky like a voxel game. I remember blue leaves and yellow logs. We were on the 6th or 7th floor, judging by the height.

      Fragment 2:
      A friend of ours, M, was buying crap again.

      Fragment 3:
      At some sort of flat. Don't remember what lead up to this scene anymore.

      There was a tongue and lips art sculpture thing on a wall. Then it became a bit more real and I then remember a giant furry outside the flat, peeking in. I remember the fur was white and the eyes were blue. I think it was a girl and she said something.



      Some notes:
      • The appearance of my parents and the questions about the "coin stand", has to do with how they often want me to try and do something else, since they are concerned I won't be able to support myself. This type of appearance in a dream is perhaps validating their concerns in part. When I was awake in bed I remember thinking about carpentry again.
      • Being at the cathedral with H seems to be merely a reflection of recent events, as I help H with pipe organ work.
      • Both the first and the third dreams were a lot longer, and I woke up sweating with the third dream; this has been happening a few times recently where I wake up sweating at about 10:20 with vivid-ish dreams. Generally being too hot is what makes the dreams vivid, as far as I can tell. Unfortunately it also means my mind is a bit more active when I'm actually awake, making it easier to forget details.
    8. lxv.

      by , 11-04-2018 at 12:16 PM
      Non-dream stuff - Woke up at 8:20 or so with my alarm, waking up from a non-lucid, sweating. Slept some more and woke up again around 2 hours later with one or two non-lucids.



      Dream 1:
      I was living in a house with my partner (H); I remember it had a ground floor and a first floor. It was day time, and sunny. One of our neighbours was a couple, a man and a woman, who had two kids, two boys I think.

      One of those boys started to "accuse" me of looking at him, when I hadn't been; this went on for a while in the dream and the parents themselves didn't seem that interested... Later on, this boy, the younger of the two I think, started messing around and eventually he tried to get into our house for some reason or something. I decided we should catch him and make him calm down and explain his problems.

      I waited for him to be on top of our wall or fence or something and then when he couldn't see me I'd grabbed him by the legs and took him in and told him to calm down, as he was obviously upset now. I asked him why he was being left here when his parents were gone and he wasn't sure; and he said that sometimes when his parents were at home he wasn't allowed in and he could hear "pumping" noises? I understood the implied meaning of this in the dream to be his parents having sex.

      I remember as soon as he calmed down and started to explain his problems I was a lot less tense too, as I hadn't wanted him to get away without an explanation for his previous behaviour at the very least.

      Seems I can't remember any more detail for this dream.

      Dream 2:
      In a square-ish L shape room. The negative shape of the L (so, a smaller square area) was a vertical section of some sort. This looked it was all part of some sort of facility. There was a glass sliding door that would lead into a corridor. Next to the door were many armed guards, standing in a formation, they looked like stormtroopers but some with no helmets on.

      By the glass around the inner part of the L, facing into the vertical section, was a woman. I can't remember what she looked like exactly but I remember something about her breasts being inflated, but then not. She was the DNA source for those clone troopers or something? But I was too or something.

      I remember suggesting an idea to her that perhaps we could change her DNA a bit further, as it was ironic that the troopers were infertile and they couldn't procreate with her. Then I remember saying or thinking something about the fact that she could give birth to our genetically modified humans as a surrogate, rather than them being grown in wherever they were grown.

      There was a lot more detail to this dream, but I've forgotten it.

      Dream 3:
      The last dream, like the rest was quite long but I only remember the last portion... I remember being in a shop, then outside at a pier... I was in Australia or something? I needed to take a boat to Europe or the Middle-East. I remember seeing a world map, but oddly Africa seemed to be missing.

      The boat and some other things looked a bit cartoony somehow. The captain was the owner and they were struggling financially or something so I bought the boat really cheap off him and then I had to get some things ready and then someone else was captain of the boat and I bought it off them again as for some reason it was sinking and buying it stopped it...

      Eventually I got on and there was some sort of transition. I remember seeing the map again.

      The next place, in someone's house. It was like a holiday house that was let to people. I looked around for others but couldn't find anyone. It was day and I could see sunlight come through windows, but the windows themselves looked too bright (nothing but white past them).

      I found some food and drinks, all prepared, for guests like myself, but I didn't take any. I looked around more for someone else and eventually entered this darker, tiny, kitchen. There was a door to the outside and it didn't look so sunny but it was still day. The door was open and there was a woman standing there with a slightly grumpy look on her face. In the kitchen was a man, about my age. He started talking to me and commenting about the house or something, and then all of a sudden he said "oh you've got a bit of a zapper there" or something like that, referring to the fact that he could see my junk poking in my pants, which incidentally were my sweatpants.

      I apologised and said that this just sometimes happened and I couldn't control it (and in fact I expected him to understand since he was a man), but I got the feeling he brought it up more to antagonise his wife or girlfriend standing outside. I took a pair of my compression gloves out of my left pocket and said to him "look, maybe these were also contributing", as my gloves felt quite bulgy inside the pocket previously. Oddly, I can't remember what happened to the gloves, and it's the first time they've appeared in a dream since I've had them.

      Then some transition.

      I was outdoors with this guy. In some city in the US. There was nobody else here initially. I had an interface overlay in my vision, reminded me of the game Boundless and the flooring looked like a specific block-type from the game and I was inspecting it. The floor looked like limestone cobbles. Then he went in a direction and I followed him; he was saying something to me when we got to the top of a slope/stairs bit though I don't remember what. I saw a church and then to its left there was a castle. There were more people here. I remember a couple of cars and a bald man with sunglasses on, inspecting someone's papers.

      The castle bit looked newer, and I asked about it and the guy said they had no old pictures or plans of it so it was rebuilt from imagination or whatever. There was an older castle/church part that had a big glass pane, and inside was a British flag like the one found on planes (the circle with 3 colours). I thought of asking the guy about it but then ended up not and just thought it was interesting.

      Rest of details lost.



      Some notes:
      • The dream with the boy reminds me now a bit of a type of novel that I hear sometimes where someone express their troubles by causing troubles, sometimes at someone else's dear expense.
      • In waking life one neighbour on the other side of the street does sometimes leave their two boys outside, when they're going out, which I don't think is good, and I think this first dream was related to this.
      • I was happy that the boy confessed his troubles as in the dream I then felt like I could do something about it. I think I remember getting on the phone with the police actually, I think when I first grabbed the boy, because I was concerned that his parents were neglecting him.
      • In the second dream there was some residual context from STRAFE, mostly with the layout and stuff like that.
      • The woman wasn't anyone I know in particular nor did she look like anyone I've seen really, but I think she had a ponytail.
      • In the third dream, the guy's presence felt a bit odd all the way throughout. It felt like there was a sinister subtext, although he did seem friendly enough...
      • I might do a bonus image for the second dream, for the layout.




      Scoring:
      + Previous score: 65.5

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 8.0
      ++ Recall a non-lucid dream * 3: 3.0
      ++ Help someone in need: 1.0 (the boy; although my tactic was a bit too aggressive, it seemed to get him talking which I think was very important)
      ++ Buy something * 2: 2.0 (the boat, twice...)
      ++ Invent something that's never been heard of before: 2.0 (the DNA altered surrogacy procedure thing)

      = Total score thus far: 73.5
    9. lxiv.

      by , 11-03-2018 at 12:05 PM
      Non-dream stuff - Woke up around 10:00, with one non-lucid sort of fresh in memory but all the detail quickly went away on waking, somehow.



      Dream fragment:
      This was from the end of the dream.

      Game-like reality; "playing" with someone else in a co-operative mode and in some underground sand or clay tunnels or something.

      The tunnels lead into a big chamber, dark. There was some sort of well at the centre. A stone colossus came towards us from the opposite side of the room and we backtracked a bit. In the dream I remember telling the other person the colossus was made of obsidian and we wouldn't be able to attack it in this form and that it would turn into black steel for a few minutes at a time every so often and we'd have to try and attack then...

      The colossus came into the tunnels/halls but I ended up darting past and into the chamber with the well; I jumped into the well, partly by accident as I meant to go across the room where there seemed to be a portal or some brightness. It was completely dark underwater and I soon "died" in a game-like fashion.

      The view changed and the camera panned out; I could hear a boss give a monologue which I don't remember in any detail, and I partly remember him asking "how did you get here? vaulted over the walls? exploited some location?" and other questions to that effect.



      Couple of notes:
      • The dream location and situation here at the end reminded me of the game Necropolis.
      • The stone colossus was similar to Anubisath, a boss in the original World of Warcraft.




      Scoring:
      + Previous score: 65.0

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 0.5
      ++ Recall a non-lucid fragment: 0.5

      = Total score thus far: 65.5
    10. lxiii.

      by , 11-02-2018 at 11:52 AM
      Non-dream stuff - Woke up at around 8:20/30 with alarm and fell asleep and had a non-lucid dream, waking up again just after 10:00.



      Dream:
      I don't quite remember the first part of the dream except that I was next to the floor or lying on it.

      I was in the bedroom from my childhood times, and the curtains were closed but it was day. I had my laptop on a desk in the room but for some reason related to another part of the dream earlier, the hard drive was missing. I tried to boot it up anyway but considered that it shouldn't be able to because there would be no OS to pick.

      It ran a load of white-on-black text as most computers do when booting, the branding/word "MICROSYSTEMS" catching my attention at one point. The boot queried for a valid pre-existing username, which I provided, and it started loading up some version of Linux OS. It immediately entered the OS without a login, which made me think to myself "it's not difficult to guess or remember a username even if you're not the computer's owner...", considering whether this was secure enough as a feature at large.

      In any case, I think I started up an internet browser, don't remember if it was any in particular and then some cartoony image was playing but it was a bit laggy so I considered maybe because it didn't have a hard drive in it was caching everything in the RAM or something, slowing down the performance. For some reason the degraded performance stopped being an issue and I went on some dodgy website and got distracted browsing through it, and it had naughty cartoon animations, basically. At some point one of the animations had sound and I didn't mute it (which I now find odd).

      I remember thinking that I was supposed to be doing something else and worried my partner or someone else was going to come in and be judgmental. I then closed all those tabs I'd basically mindlessly opened and tried to remember whatever it was I was supposed to be doing.

      The dream went on for a bit longer but I don't remember any details.



      Some notes:

      • Perhaps the weirdest part about the boot up was that there was no flash drive or anything that the OS could have loaded from, so it would have to be stored in a ROM module or something, since the hard drive was out... I didn't remember or think to have a look at the internals or anything.
      • I don't know if MicroSystems is an actual brand or not, but it's a pretty logical/easily thought of name...
      • The dream's theme from the second half relates a bit to my teen context when I would get a bit anxious looking at explicit material because I was always worried about being interrupted.
      • The lack of self-control is two-fold in this dream; one, because I was not lucid, and two, because it relates to the waking-life context of me struggling to, when drawing something of more sexual nature, to not get excited by it. It's an annoying issue because it results in unfinished work that I would like to finish but never feel motivated to, because I'd like to actually just work on it for once, instead of getting excited.




      Scoring:
      + Previous score: 64.0

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 1.0
      ++ Recall a non-lucid dream: 1.0

      = Total score thus far: 65.0
    11. lxii.

      by , 11-01-2018 at 12:48 PM
      Non-dream stuff - Woke up at about 8:20 or so with one of my alarms, but went back to sleep. Woke up again nearer 11:00. Was having a semi-vivid non-lucid dream, some details lost now because I had to get up to do other stuff.



      Dream:
      I remember my computer screen. I was sitting down to do something and then some weird pop-ups and music started. I couldn't find out what was causing the music to play so I started looking at the list of processes, finding a few things that looked out of place. I was a bit startled to find this was some sort of malware playing the music, and causing these pop-ups, which for once were mostly innocent (and somewhat detailed) drawings of several themes.

      Even so I was feeling under threat or stressed and I looked at the file location for the suspicious processes, continuously closing these pop-ups as they appeared. The music was sort of calm, nothing intense, but it didn't feel any less unnerving in the dream. I found the files for the music-playing program and there was a file without an extension called "about"; I opened it up with NPP, which as expected revealed a few lines of text, including the motivation of the person that made this malware thing. Apparently it was from a Swiss games company, which I thought was very odd. I remember an e-mail address and some other details.

      I remember thinking it was my own fault for not having an anti-virus installed and I was showing the malware to my partner (H) I think. But then I noticed a little tray icon for Avast or something like that and I said to H "see, it doesn't detect it...", referencing the lack of any alerts.

      In the end I think I was going to delete the files of the malware programs, as they didn't look like they'd been protected in any way, but I can't remember what I actually did do.

      Then some transition. Remember being in a town or city. In the US maybe? I was walking along with H and I think it was dusk or day time, but we went into this fancy modern/futuristic-looking building that was like a big surface tunnel; inside it looked kind of like a mall and was a bit busy, and I remember H interacting with someone. A guy that was working at a restaurant dropped something while clearing trays and H helped.

      Not sure what happened next. Transition?

      Outside, slightly sloped area, evening/sunset. Some houses. Thinking about the malware again? Faint memory of the music again.

      There was more, but I seem to have lost recall for the next bits.



      Some notes:
      • The particular vividness of this dream did not seem to make me any more aware or questioning of its nature than usual.
      • The music playing may mean that in waking life there was some other sound. This may have been my alarm or later one of H's alarms. Either way, music playing in dreams often relates to their vividness for me, though they are not always implicit to each other.
      • The drawings were of things like classic representations of landscapes but also of "furry" themes and still life.





      Scoring:
      + Previous score: 62.0

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 2.0
      ++ Recall a non-lucid dream: 1.0
      ++ Ask for advice: 1.0 (asking H for help with the malware)

      = Total score thus far: 64.0

      Updated 11-06-2018 at 12:38 PM by 95293 (Score typo)

      Categories
      non-lucid , side notes
    12. lx. lxi.

      by , 10-31-2018 at 01:12 PM
      lx. 28th or 29th of October

      Dream fragment:
      Something about some "stragglers"? I remember a location, from a bird's eye point of view, it was rural, there was a big mansion/manor in the middle. Remember going there and being told to try the stragglers. Remember another dream location supposedly nearby. Looked a bit like a dump inside, it was like a giant metal container, not unlike a shipping container but bigger.

      Some sort of dwarf-like people, these stragglers. I was here to mine some titanium ore or something, and they hadn't been able to find any but I did.



      lxi. today, 31st of October

      Dream fragment:
      Something about my partner wanting pizza.

      Dream fragment:
      A dream that was half-real half-game? Everything was fine but then there was some sort of war? Remember building blocky planes or vehicles and wondering if I couldn't just stay behind to do important logistics instead of flying off.

      At some point in this dream I remember a living room of some sort and some pizza, a tv and a sofa...



      Some notes about the dreaming:
      • The first dream fragment feels related to the story I started writing a couple of weeks ago as a dreaming script. I have been thinking about that story but not writing a lot on it because of my tiredness.
      • The war dream and building a plane probably comes from recently trying out the game "Besiege".


      Some general waking-life notes:

      • I've been a bit too tired recently and just can't get up or wake up at the time I want to, and it has happened I've gone to bed later than I wanted to as well.
      • Lately I've been thinking about why certain elements never come up in dreams; such as reflective surfaces and some of things I do in waking life (such as painting and drawing).
      • There have been mornings where I did initially recall a small dream fragment lately, but several times I had to get up and get on with something else and I'd forget the fragments or not have focused enough on them initially to be able to make a mental or written note.
      • I have been practicing reality checks quite often and especially trying to make note of when things could potentially be dream elements. But the intention or the check muscle memory doesn't seem to be carrying over at all into dreams at the moment. Maybe I need to read more again, that seems to stimulate something different.




      Scoring:
      + Previous score: 60.5

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 1.5
      ++ Recall a non-lucid fragment * 3: 1.5

      = Total score thus far: 62.0

      Updated 10-31-2018 at 01:16 PM by 95293

      Categories
      non-lucid , dream fragment , side notes
    13. lviii. lix.

      by , 10-26-2018 at 11:40 AM
      lviii. 25th of October

      Non-lucid fragment:
      Some guy wanting me to have sex with him, I told him I didn't want to, and he insisted about it, and I told him I'd made that mistake before and I wasn't going to treat my partner (H) that way again. I remember telling him to ask H if he'd wanted to have sex with him and then at some other point in the dream I remember meeting up with H.

      The dream took place in some unknown dream-generated location. It was day, the light and the sky were yellow/orange and there were rock cliffs and wide ravines. The rock was warm colours too.



      lix. 26th of October (date of this post)

      Non-lucid fragment:
      Something about being flexible enough to inspect my bottom; Was trying to identify the cause of some pain. For context, in waking life I've been having pain in that area for quite some time but it comes and goes, likely part of my condition.

      Non-lucid dream:
      I remember driving a truck from outside its cabin, around a roundabout some several times trying to figure out where I was supposed to be going. There was some halloween party at some castle and the truck had supplies I was going to deliver. Busy traffic at this roundabout, was constantly worried about causing an accident, but not so worried because I was on the truck and not in a car.

      Transition.

      In a fancy hotel/penthouse-like place. Me and H were walking toward a door, carrying some stuff. We were expected. This was the personal penthouse of some old Pioneer Corp executive. We were bringing some gear to demo to this guy and I think he was curious about us bringing in stuff this old.

      I was carrying one of the very heavy power-amps but it seemed exceptionally light and maybe a bit too small; still, I was very careful putting it down on a glass table and H was bringing in some not-too-big speakers that would go on top of a table too. We got it all set up after a bit of faffing around but the Japanese executive didn't seem to mind. There was another man, a fat white guy with some beard and long-ish hair, who looked a bit like a hippie and maybe had a Hawaiian shirt.

      Then they asked us what we were going to play on the sound system and I can't remember what were our first thoughts, something classical? Then someone or H said the Matrix soundtrack, and I said "yeah that'll work". The Japanese man seemed satisfied enough with that choice and he had given us a choice after all.

      I remember the furniture all being wood, in a light-ish stain; sort of orange but very highly waxed or varnished.

      Some sort of transition, all of a sudden watching some version of the World of Warcraft film (which I haven't watched in waking life), and I remember thinking and commenting how bad some details looked. The story was all over the place, with King Terenas and his son Arthas being underwater and Arthas trying to murder his father with a long blade and laughing underwater. Arthas' hair was black, rather than blonde in the dream.

      Then there was some sort of Alliance siege on an underground naval barricade.

      I don't remember enough details to describe the scene and it was all a bit messy to be honest; for most of it my perspective was directly within the "film".



      I will do some scoring a bit later. Not adding any notes. I'm really tired and was almost not motivated enough to even write this entry.


      Scoring:
      + Previous score: 58.5

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 2.0
      ++ Recall a non-lucid fragment * 2: 1.0
      ++ Recall a non-lucid dream: 1.0

      = Total score thus far: 60.5

      Updated 10-28-2018 at 01:48 AM by 95293

      Categories
      non-lucid , dream fragment
    14. lvi.

      by , 10-22-2018 at 12:19 PM
      Non-dream stuff - Woke up at about 7:40, I was very hot, remembering a non-lucid as I came out of it; initially wasn't going to make note of it but did so on my phone, remembering more detail than expected but quite tired so some details missed. Then I woke up again at around 11:00, with a non-lucid dream in memory that started fragmenting but didn't disappear as I got up.



      Dream 1:
      Was dreaming I was walking through a supermarket store with my partner (H) and it was a bit busy. The shop had a weird layout and looked like it was just in an old warehouse; the floor was a mix of large tiles and bare concrete? It was day outside and some light could get in through corrugated plastic that was only partly translucent. The place didn't look all that clean.

      Got to the other end and there was a tourniquet and a guy watching over it behind a counter. Somehow H had a ticket, it looked green and bulky. I asked if we should both go through at the same time but instantly I thought this wasn't a good idea with the guy watching so closely even if it was busy.

      I tried asking the guy about getting a ticket and he wasn't very interested in helping me and gestured to a machine. I ran up to it as some other people were slowly getting up to it too. I got in line first and probably annoyed the others; I couldn't read the screen properly because it looked like a calculator's liquid crystal display and it was small and dirty. Background was typical dry yellow-green and black letters.

      I faffed about with the controls because I couldn't see or reach properly. I felt twisted trying to use the machine. A kid with a yellow cap helped me and I thanked her and gave her a pat on the cap saying "thank you, you're a good kid" and I think she smiled.

      Struggling to get my wallet out from my (left?) pants pocket. I got it out and it was the wallet I have in waking life; there was a flat bit on the machine and I opened the coin bit and dumped it over the flat area and a lot of junk came out; there was a tiny blazon thing, some rocky/gravel fragments, and other things I don't remember. The total money I had that I could use was about 1.14 or something, and I apparently needed 1.73 or so for the machine.

      I put the crap back in my wallet and inserted what money I had somewhere into the machine and got the ticket and ran back to the tourniquet and H had already gone past it. I tried passing too now with the ticket but it wouldn't work and the guy at the counter said it didn't have enough money in it, I said "I know it doesn't but I don't have enough cash on me" to which he replied "you can pay with contactless...". I said "I didn't even notice any card payments" and I was hoping he'd pity me or feel sorry for me at least and be kind but I tried asking him to just sort it out with me here and now, but he ignored me and eventually told me to go walk around and get back to him.

      H come back but it wasn't H anymore but a friend from my childhood M, and I asked him what happened to him, as his nose was all bloody. I remember him smiling but don't remember his answer.

      I walked around and watched people in the shop getting milk and so on, and as I walk along, this black teenager has a trolley that acts like a spider or something; as he comes past me I smile awkwardly because somehow I think it's amusing and he was smiling too. I remember thinking he'd modified the trolley himself.

      Going through a cheap art prints section, it's very busy, and I appreciate seeing some of the art pieces anyway. I get to the end of the aisle and it's a corner of the building, so there's only a left turn, which I take and there are some vases with big-ish plants in them, like small palms. I start heading back to the guy at the counter and the tourniquet and then this bouncy beach ball appears and is going towards the vases; I see it hit one and I watch until it's just about to hit the ground, turning my head back in the direction I was walking and it makes a thud noise, presumably not breaking, and I hear people sigh in relief.

      Then the tourniquet guy accuses some youth and me as being responsible; I say I don't even know this guy and I was walking around like he'd told me in the first place and get pissed off, feeling like punching him in the face. I wake up sweating and too hot.

      Dream 2 (in pieces):
      I was in some unknown place, it was night and there were ancient Egyptian buildings. It was dark but I remember some creatures or some danger, and there was a pick-up truck thing, which someone was driving; they told me to get in the back and I remember climbing over in a rushed manner and sort of fumbling into the back.

      We drove away I think. Transition?

      In a building nearby, ancient. Dark inside, some faint blue glows. I remember previous parts of the dream where I was collecting some blue glowing stones, and here was a final one or something; this was a fourth stone.

      In this building there were two tiers, the ground level and a higher level on a bridge. There was some sort of lift mechanism to go up. I went up to the bridge, made of glass and maybe some metal, and there was a door at the end; glowing blue, faintly, with 4 square sections, for the stones. Dream implied I placed them and transition, unsure where to, but maybe I remember a dark hall next. Some sort of pet creature, a cat? Dream is too fragmented at this point and there are several possible fragments that could fit here, but not enough detail for them...

      At some point at the ground floor of a tall building, modern, day time, lots of glass, light coming in from outside. Some sort of levitating lift platform, my mom is nearby I seem to remember, but I break the platform trying to use it. A guy gets annoyed at me and I say "look it's fine, I can fix it" and I see there's a circuit board and I inspect it looking for an issue; it's snapped at one of the ends but it actually doesn't seem so important that it can't just be jumped with a new lead and some components moved; I do it somehow and it's fixed but the guy wasn't happy anyway.

      Transition, at the top of the same building, arrived in some sort of elevator. A much smaller room, but still like a big office hall, but glass all around still. I really need a wee and ask someone to use the bathroom, they tell me to go to a horizontal cylinder near one of the windows; apparently this thing is the toilet... I get inside this plastic tube thing, it is really uncomfortable inside, and I start getting pain hypersensitivity because there are sharp plastic edges and I ask for help to get out because I can't manage on my own; I give up on the toilet idea and am annoyed by the fact that these people aren't sensible to just have a bathroom that's actually a room.

      There is a big door. Reminds me now of a level transition door from STRAFE's final levels. I remember going through, different feel to this area. Isolated, darker, but still bright. There's someone else here, some sort of boss? But they're hidden, and I remember walking around at a calm pace, exploring. It looks like some sort of game level, there are conveyor belts and pick ups and dark pits. I see some glowing green panels, again, like STRAFE. I don't remember what I did next or what happened but woke up soon after.



      Some notes:
      • Dreams from which I wake up too hot I think have an inverse cause-effect relationship. I think I'm having those dreams because I'm too hot, as when my body temperature regulation goes bad I start to get a lot of mental side-effects (if I'm awake and body temperature goes awry I start getting "fever-dream" effects).
      • The kid that had the cap, the cap was like ones I've seen (and worn) in my childhood, when I was very young and we went to the beach, for one example.
      • Though I wasn't aware of it at any level in the dream, there were actually a lot of elements in the last part of the 2nd dream that reminded me of a mixture of STRAFE and certain malls I've been to.
      • The other glowing blue stones weren't just dream memories, I had actually dreamed those bits too, but most of that was too vague and of little visual detail for me to be able to put into words.
      • Overall the 2nd dream was very long.
      • I've started noticing a pattern/dream sign with these two dreams, which I think has only started occurring recently; the feeling of being twisted using the ticket machine, struggling to get into the back of the pick-up truck and the cylindrical sharp edges plastic "toilet" thing. In all of these, there was a heightened sensation of struggle and pain to reach for things or to move. This may be related to something that is going outside the dream world...





      Scoring thus far:
      + Previous score: 52.0

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 5.0
      ++ Recall a non-lucid dream * 2: 2.0
      ++ Buy something: 1.0 (the ticket)
      ++ Ask for advice * 2: 2.0 (asking the ticket guy for help; asking for the bathroom)

      = Total score thus far: 57.0
    15. lv.

      by , 10-20-2018 at 10:49 AM
      Non-dream stuff - Woke up at about 8:30 but didn't remember any dreams, fell asleep and woke up again at 10:15, initially remembering a couple of dreams that started to fragment before I got up to write on the DJ.



      Dream:
      I was at a computer and looking at a website; it had a plain black background and it was some sort of shop, selling plushies. There was a dropdown box and there were about 5 options. I had a dream memory or dream bit where I bought something like a crate of 200 ram plushies from some other website at a much lower price, for about 50 in total. On this website, each plushie cost anything between 16.99 and 38.99 or so.

      I remember buying a goat plushie and when I clicked on the plushie titles from the dropdown box an image changed to show a rotating photo of them as a preview. Then I saw there was a little wolf, called something like "bloodthirsty wolf" or something, and it was really cute and had really large bloodied fangs and had an open maw. The size of the mouth and head looked exaggerated on purpose. Most of the plushies looked to be exceedingly well detailed, despite not being much bigger in size than my closed fist; they were in a cartoony style. I really wanted to buy the wolf plushie too and I think I did, but I started to wonder if I should be spending so much money on plushies. Remember thinking to look at my bank balance, but for some reason my phone wasn't near me and I ended up not checking.

      It seems I've forgotten the other dreams as I wrote this one, hopefully remember them or fragments while doing something else...



      Some notes:
      • While I really do like collecting animal plushes, I haven't bought any in some time now.
      • I also wouldn't, in principle, be looking to buy them online. I like to know the quality of the material as I buy them, as when I was a child I always had a somewhat irrational fear that plushes I had would tear apart etc if you weren't very careful. I still feel like I have to be very careful with some, as I don't like the idea of damaging them.
      • There's a big connection to my childhood from plushes in general, as my room had a lot of them by the time I was a teen. Friends often made fun of it if they were visiting and my oldest sibling would sometimes mess around with them which would really upset me and almost make me cry sometimes, though he actually didn't mean it with any ill intent. I just saw things as being very fragile, while he never did.
      • A pair of plushies I last bought were two fluffy sheep. The ones available on the dream website seemed to be sheep, rams, goats and wolves.
      • I'm not sure what brought on this dream context as a whole, as I see my and my partner's plushies around the house often, every day.
      • Edit: discussed the dream briefly with my partner and he reminded me that recently we'd been working with goat and sheep leather, and that was probably what elated this dream context. I found myself immediately thinking about the leather as he mentioned this, and thinking how the fluffy side would be interesting as a material on plushes.




      Scoring thus far:
      + Previous score: 51.0

      + This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 1.0
      ++ Recall a non-lucid dream: 1.0

      = Total score thus far: 52.0

      Updated 10-20-2018 at 11:23 AM by 95293

      Categories
      non-lucid , side notes
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