Hopeless Wanderings

lucid dream: 9-19-10



I haven't been recording any of my dreams lately, so it was surprising that I was able to have a lucid. I don't remember all the details, but it was a really long lucid and pretty vivid.


The first thing I remember was being in the computer room and looking in the closet. I had like 3 or 4 dresses in there and was looking for something to wear to homecoming. Two of the dresses I had never seen in my life and don't remember buying, so I'm not sure but I think that made me wonder if I was dreaming. But it seemed so real, there was no way I could be dreaming. But I did a reality check anyway and looked at my hands, one at a time. My left hand looked normal but my right hand had an extra finger, I I knew I had to be dreaming. I wasn't really sure what to do. I guess I just wanted to fool around and do random stuff so I went outside. I really don't remember a lot of what I did, but it was a really long dream. At one point I remember jumping up in the air and flapping my arms to try to get higher. I was in the middle of the road and cars would go past me. Someone shouted my name and I shouted back "My name is Elsia!" because they called me by my real name and apparently I was "Elsia" at the time. It was really hard to get high up in the air. Finally on the third time I got pretty high, I think it was about 6 stories up or so, but floated back down right away. I also remember something about a car crash.... but I don't remember any details. And I tried to teleport at some time. I acted like Hiro from the show Heroes and closed my eyes and tried to teleport but it didn't work. I also tried to stop time but that didn't work either. I was afraid of losing my lucidity so I focused on a blade of grass and it worked. Oh and then my friend Dani showed up at the bus stop for some reason(she doesn't live by me, or even take the bus) so I waited with her till the bus came. I started acting normal, just seeing where the dream would take me. We got on the bus and I forgot where it took us. Probably to school.

I wish I could remember more of this dream, it was really long and fun!

regular dreams: 9-6-10

The first two dreams are from several nights ago and they are kinda depressing/disturbing. I don't really know why I had these dreams, probably from watching too many scary movies or something. The last dream is from last night. I can't remember much so they are just fragments.

Rape
I don't know who's house we were at, mine or someone else's. There was this middle aged woman there, with curly brown hair. I was just standing there watching as this guy was creeping around the outside of the house trying to break in. I called the cops but the line was busy and they never came. The guy got in the house and raped her right in front of me. This happened multiple times, it was like the dream was repeating itself and I couldn't change the outcome.

My Suicide
I was in my room and I'm not sure why but I wanted to die. So I think I took some pills or maybe cut my wrists, I don't remember. There were some people trying to get in my room and help me but they couldn't. I knew that I wouldn't die no matter what because I think part of me might have known that I was in a dream and I can't get injured in dreams. So all I really remember is sitting on the floor in my room dying.. or not.

Late For Class
It was third block(hour, class, whatever) and I was at my locker talking to a friend. I had forgotten what class I had next and the time clock was counting down. I started freaking out and looked at my schedule and saw that I had accounting class next(I don't even take that class in real life) and it was downstairs. So I hurriedly walked to the back of the school and to the right to a staircase(even though there's not one there in real life) and got to class like 5 minutes after the bell rang. But it didn't matter because the teacher said he never takes attendance and didn't care. Then I realized that I might have early lunch instead of late so I didn't even know if I was supposed to be there.