International Oneironaut Shared Dreaming Journal

Kumara's Dreams

Childhood defenses and threatening transformation

I am driving fast, and as I crest a hill, I hit a huge wave of vibration that I thought of as “resistance”, an impression of police on the side of the road with a radar-type instrument that was emitting the waves. The vehicle slowed wayyyy down and I felt the vibrations all through my body, it was as if reality itself was impacted by the waves. I grabbed my seatbelt and fastened it, though it was difficult, like moving through molasses.

I drive on and to take shelter in a building on the beach, and many people were streaming by, running toward the water. Big machines were coming, that I thought of as “transformers” that I only maybe had a glimpse of.

I was with Pax and a little girl, we were running for the shelter. I didn’t think we had long so I stopped to tell Pax and the little girl that I love them. I faced Pax and as I told him I love him, he said something at the same time. I felt a little sad, I don’t remember what he said but I felt at the time it was dismissive. Then we were running and I started to yell at the little girl that I love her, but I only had an impression of a Little Debbie’s box that was under her arm or she had become the box, and I realized, “she’s not even real!”.

We ran into the shelter. Pax and I sat on a landing in the stairwell. The first big machine went by, and I could see in my mind a cartoon of toys that had come to battle the ‘transformers’. Then another machine came by, and I knew this one was more dangerous because it was radiating heat. It hit the building I was in, and the building listed and fell over. I was unharmed, and now felt more like a point of awareness than an “I”. The corner of the landing turned over on me, thus protecting me. While I felt the heat and the rumble of the machine passing by, I could simultaneously see in my mind a line of cartoon tugboats all lined up to my left, with faces and determined looks, all there to fight the threatening machines. I noticed a thought, “it’s as if all of my childhood toys are lining up to protect me/fight.”


The Indian guy on my back

I was lying on my couch, it seemed like me in a different reality because I had a different, larger laptop that was on a stand in front of me next to the couch. I was on my left side, and a browser was open on the laptop. A tab popped open, and maybe more had that I closed, I remember the screen was red with a white CB logo, I understood that I had picked up some sort of virus. As I was noticing that, I noticed how I was feeling and did an RC. “Can I fly?” I started to rise up out of my body off of the couch, so I went with it and let myself float up and I flew out of my apartment. I noticed the view of the weeping willows in the dark, lit by the nightlights on the property. I noticed how real it seemed and that I could understand how I could forget I was dreaming. I flew off into the sky, wanting to just fly a bit and have a look around. I remember at some point feeling like flying was difficult so I was making swimming strokes to keep going.

I put my hands out in front of me Superman –style. I felt a warmth behind me and a man’s hands appeared over mine. Someone was on my back and weighing me down. I was furious. I flew to a building, through a wall and landed on my feet on a stairwell landing. I twisted as fast as I could to detach from whoever was on my back, and face him. He was slight Indian man, about my height, with dark hair not quite shoulder-length and a closely-trimmed beard. He seemed “weathered”, and had a light scar running diagonally down from his left along his left pec. His expression I would say was “chagrined”. I angrily yelled at him, “WHO ARE YOU?”. I don’t remember if he answered.


Going down on a cutie

I walked into a bedroom, it was dark and I saw a girl I knew (in the dream) lying in bed. I saw another figure in the bed and wondered if someone was in bed with her or if it was a stuffed animal. I wanted to slide in under the covers and kiss her body and go down on her. She woke up and smiled at me.

Spoiler for Dream sex details:

I asked her if she wanted me to lick her pussy and she happily agreed. Scene change to being in a bathroom with her, she is sitting naked on the counter. The counter is ceramic tile. Her legs are spread before me and she is welcoming me. I am SO happy to please her sexually, and I put my hands on her thighs and bury my face, gently, in her bush. I’m gently flicking my tongue along her clit, and sucking on it while she directs me to be gentle, gentle. She is loving it and I’m loving that she is loving it. Next thing I notice is she is somehow lying on her back while I put pressure on her lower belly to enhance her pleasure, and am enticing her and excited about putting my fingers inside of her, because I know she loves it.

End of what I remember in the dream.

Dream fragments

Fragments of feeling choked, closed in around my throat on all sides by a presence (I slightly awakened, noticed my body was ok, then went back into the dream). Feelings of pressure, being surrounded. I remember once feeling threatened and powerless and surrounded by beings “choking” me and asking, “god, what do I do?” and then relief.