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    1. 19 Mar: Buddhist Lama and attempting TOTM

      by , 03-19-2021 at 10:41 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      In the countryside, there is a lake and I am staying there with some friends. One of them is apparently developing feelings for me and because I am not interested, I decide to keep my distance from him. Literally, when he is on one side of the lake, I am at the opposite, and every time he tries to reach me, I move away. Our other friend comes to tell me he thinks our friend is depressed and he believes it is because of the recent racism escalation so he wants to throw him some lunch party or something and I find it a bad idea because his problem with him is uncorresponded love, but I tell him to go ahead, just don't count on me.

      Then I am in the mountains. At a wooden cabin. I hear gunshots, probably hunters, which I detest. I go check on my dogs who are outside within a fence, but hunters sometimes don't care, they shoot anything that moves, so I fear for their safety. I see a couple Buddhist nuns passing by, and ask them if they've seen hunters around. They say they heard the shots and are saying prayers towards the animals at risk. Then some larger group passes right in front of my gate. The main figure is a Buddhist Lama and he comes surrounded by many monks, one of them by his side carrying a golden metal piece I can't identify. When passing in front of my lawn, the Lama grabs the piece quickly and drops it heavily at our entrance and apparently that means something important. They all come onto the lawn and sit around the Lama who is facing the golden object doing prayers. Then he makes some unintelligible prediction about a baby. Riverstone, whom I haven't noticed before was there, claims to hear something like a baby crying behind a wooden wall on our backs. It's supposed to be a hollow space for storage under a staircase or something, which has a door on the back that I know is locked with several locks. He is kinda out of his mind so he rips a board from the wall, not even letting me say there is a door. Inside this space is an altar covered in brocades and inside some covers is a baby girl that he picks up in awe and shock and brings to the Lama. Everybody is thinking of miracles but I know there is a door at the back of this pillar and ask Fernando S., who is also there, to check if the door is unlocked. He quietly confirms that it is unlocked. I get a bit pissed about the whole show, I don't understand the need for faking this whole shenanigan and I go outside the fence to the beginning of the hill descent. It's dark but I can see there are many other cabins and lots of activity going on, fires and prayers. It totally looks one of those Tibetan Buddhist settlements in the mountains, around monasteries and I think of my guru.


      Literally I am telling the previous dream to Riverstone. I get to the part of the monks sitting at the garden. And he is so excited to hear it, just as he was in the original dream to live it. He is grasping for a meaning and I can tell he will be disappointed in the end. Anyway, I didn't reach the end of the story.


      I am sleeping at some kind of attic at some family gathering. My dad, my deceased uncle Fermando and his wife are in that same house but they wanna leave, so my dad comes to wake me up to join him in offer them a gift before they go. I was pretending to be sleeping, cause I didn't want to be involved, but I notice them coming to check on me, so before they see me, I sneak out of bed and hide between an opened closet and remember I had more interesting things to do.
      I get lucid and teleport myself to outside. Remember to do the TOTM but cant do the ceiling fan thing because I am outside now, so I go for the surf thing. I visualize the ocean just over the end of a hill nearby and I start hearing the water. I go there and half way walking on grass, the ground beneath me disappears and I fall from the sky into the ocean. Amidst the waves, I try to visualize a surf board but it does not work. I kinda feel it but I do not see it, so I catch a wave in an invisible board. Then i see some kids surfing. One of them fall from his board and I "borrow" it. They are pissed about it, but I tell them it's just to catch one wave and I'll give it back. But the waves are really flat. I catch two, but have difficulty in taking any pleasure in the experience. Feels more like sliding over flat water, than actually surfing, as the waves are so small. The last wave pushes me into what seems a small cave but then it is a room.
      The dream shifts and now I am with kids in a room and they are waiting for the educator to come back. They say she'll put me in detention for making a mess. Indeed I am all wet and spread mud and water all over the pillows I am supposed to be sitting on. But when she comes in and before she manages to say anything, I sneak out and think I wanna surf more, but I am in the countryside again. I visualize an ocean bay and I head there. I am on top of a cliff where people watch beach goers down below. I then see Fernanda in a modelling gig shooting pics at the other side of this cliff, where there is some kind of canyon or canal and other people leaning over a rail, watching it. I ignore, because my goal is to surf again, so I turn again to the bay but it is gone and now in its place is a walk-in water fountain in a park with kids playing. Damn.
      I walk a few more steps towards the end of this park and someone calls my name excited. It's a friend of a friend (who actually does not exist in RL). I come back to say hi and she is very unpleasant, asking what I am doing here as I should be with my family or something. Then she has another friend with her, whom I never met, and she insults me too, saying maybe I am fooling around with some guy as I did with that guy in Italy while my boyfriend was at home. I did not do anything like that in RL, but in the dream I felt like I did, so I ask why this bitch knows about this and how many more friends of friends know. But then I say it doesn't matter because I don't know them anyway and I couldn't care less. I turn around to leave and they also leave still laughing and insulting me. I just go back two steps to tell the lady that I actually thought she was a nice person except for the part where she is a fucking cunt. They went down some stairs and when I look around I am inside some house again, seems like a clinic. There are rooms with patients and rooms with professionals apparently receiving training. I feel I am intruding but the patients gathering at some leisure room are very welcoming. Then I realize they all have back problems and are there for some physical therapy. I see something in the walls that catches my attention: intricate living landscapes. Each frame has divisions with small landscapes like lakes, ponds, ocean. You can see tiny rocks in it, mosses, algae, all real but in tiny size and most incredibly they are all covered in water that stays vertically in the divisions without anything holding it. Also, we are encouraged to touch it and make waves, make the water muddy, etc. Then I recall again my objective and I am considering choosing an ocean landscape to jump into it, but I wake up.

      Updated 03-19-2021 at 10:47 AM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , task of the month
    2. 22 Sep: Shrink to atom size, reverse gravity and meeting my guru

      by , 09-24-2010 at 11:25 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING PRECOG


      23:20 GMT – Sleep

      Fragment
      I’m on some meeting and I am extracting energy from both my surroundings and the instructor who is talking.

      2:20 GMT

      Business fair
      I’m on Mercado da Ribeira (a market in Lisbon). There’s some kind of fair going on and I see my friend Alfredo there, talking to other people. I also need to talk to him. I wave at him and he makes some sign that we’ll talk later. I’m behind a desk and showing some samples of some aromatic butter-like substance, in different colours and odours. Two foreign visitors are enjoying the smell of a lavender-butter when by my left side appears my most recent ex-boss. She tells them something in a very rude way. I don’t remember what, but included the word “shit”. They are shocked at her manners. She admits she is a bit stressed but doesn’t think she said anything inappropriate. While she waits for their reaction or answer, she goes away meet this other group of people where my friend is included and the two guys open up with me. I tell them she used to be my boss and that they have no idea... They showed solidarity with me but I tell them they should still close the deal with her, despite everything.

      Crazy kid and vacation at resort
      I’m on some tall building. As I entered and climbed the stairs I noticed it is practically empty, with just a few neighbours on the lower floors. I go to some top floor, looking for something or someone and enter an apartment, which I sense like mine or a place where I’m temporarily staying. It is totally empty, but my cat is there. Some windows are open and I rush to close it (because of the cat). Then some friends arrive and with them is an evil kid. He keeps playing with a knife and saying he is going downstairs and kill the neighbours. I tell him to behave and he also threatens me with the knife. Now I’m pissed and I confess I fear for cat, who is vulnerable around a deranged kid like this. I use all my best psychology skills to change his attitude but he improves just a little bit.
      Then I talk to my friends and we’re exchanging stories about tourists in trouble – like these guys who stayed at this sleezy hotel with a code to enter the room instead of key (which in itself is ok) but then the owner of the hotel would sell the codes to some mafia guys who would kidnapped people in the middle of the night, for human trafficking. Not nice. I remember I will be travelling again soon and hope I don’t happen to stay in such places.
      Then we all go outside and I realise we’re on some type of touristic area. One of the friends needs to go to her apart-hotel to get something and I see we’re in some kind of beach resort.


      5:15 GMT

      Marrying a cousin
      I’m on some room similar to my older room at mom’s house and lots of family members are there, including my mom and my cousin R. I don’t recall the entire conversation but my family is convinced we should marry – me and my cousin. They say it’s not a consensual decision, that they are not happy about it, but considering the circumstances it is the only solution. I wonder what the hell justifies that? I’m not pregnant of him or anything. When I was a kid I had a crush on him, but that was it. My cousin is looking at me, anxious for my answer and I find this all very odd.
      I walk around the room and find my Tanto (a Japanese dagger) broken on the floor – the grip separated from the blade. I fix it, upset that someone had broken it and I turn to my family and tell them no. I don’t want to marry my cousin, I don’t have any reasons to do so. Why are they even considering such a stupid thing?


      My mom pregnant
      Later I talk to my mom alone and she tells me she is worried. She recovered 3 of the 4kgs she had lost with her new diet. She says its not because of overeating, she thinks she is pregnant. I’m totally surprised, but the “worst” is yet to come. I ask who would be the father of the child and she tells me it’s my father. Then I’m totally shocked – they are separated for more than 10 years now and there’s no way they can get along ever again. How the hell this happened? She says she does not plan to get back with him, that it was just an accident and that’s why she is freaking out.

      Shrink to atom size
      I’m on a bathtub and decide to do RC. I realise I’m dreaming and get lucid. I decide to shrink to atom size. I close my eyes, because I decided to try it this way when I was awake. It is kind of working, I feel myself shrinking. When I open my eyes I’m about the size of a human finger. I see two huge people approaching and we're on this enormous room (bathroom) with an endless table by my right side, that looks like a tall platform on top of really high columns. I close my eyes again and continue shrinking but this time I almost wake up and have to make an effort to stay “on”. When I try to open my eyes I feel my “real” eyes opening and have to stop not to wake up. Then, when I feel I’m more stable on the dream, I open my eyes slowly, but all I see is darkness. I no longer have body or shape, I’m just consciousness in a dark void. All I see is very faint clusters of white dots, like distant stars or galaxies. It actually looks like outerspace, but I try not to judge the result. Probably the atomic world looks like outerspace.

      My guru’s mandala fortress and reversed gravity
      Then I close my eyes again and think of next task (this one set by me). When I open my eyes I am on some house. I decide to summon a portal, like the blue water-like portal I saw some days ago in a dream. But I fail to do so. Not even a ripple in the time-space continuum. So I stick to the mirror approach. I find a wardrobe with a mirror on the door and I think I want to go meet my guru. Then I cross the mirror and find myself on this green area facing a huge wall, like a fortress, in front of me. I see some guy at the top of the wall and decide to fly to there. For some reason it is not easy and something is keeping me from flying to the top. I am blocked like 1 meter away from the top but this guy gives me a hand and pulls me inside.
      Once inside I see this plateau, with lush gardens and some pretty houses. There’s a group of people around some table I presume are his students and I ask them where can I find our guru. A hippie like blond bearded guy tells me he will be at the casern at 7 o’clock. I wonder where is that and what 7 o’clock is he referring: mine or this place’s? I think tht maybe my guru is not asleep at this moment and therefore I cannot meet him, but I’m not sure if it works that way – Buddhist teachers are said to be always available to the students, always!

      [On awaking I looked for the meaning of casern and found this: In fortification, caserns are little rooms, lodgments, or apartments, erected between the ramparts and the houses of fortified towns, or even on the ramparts themselves; to serve as lodgings for the soldiers of the garrison. This confirms I was indeed in a fortress.]
      Then these guys just leave to go somewhere and leave me alone. I decide I can’t wait until 7:00, if it’s mine 7:00 because by then I will be waking up. I look around and find a second wall in the centre of this fortified town – a fortress within a fortress - and decide to go there. This time I manage to fly directly to the top of it.
      I find a second group of people – more of his students – also around a table on some lovely terrace. They are eating and I decide to join them. Once again I ask for our guru, but this time, from my right side a head leans forward and I see my teacher’s face looking at me, surprised. Hi say hi and ask if it’s ok that I looked for him. He says “Sure, why not!” But then it’s hard to chat with him, with all these people around and someone between us. Anyway I had prepared something to say but I feel maybe I should wait for him to talk to me. Then he starts joking around – his face transforms. First I think – could he be just a DC I’m projecting, but his signature was so real. Then when the transformation ends, he has the face of Mao-Tse Tung. I laugh, because that’s something he would definitely do to jerk around with us. I ask why he changed his look to Mao and then he changes again and he’s now an old lady with white hair, glasses and granny’s clothes. He is just being himself.
      Then everybody gets up and my guru flies away. He actually went down to the lower level fortress. From up there, where we are, it looks like a giant green lush valley. Others start following him, although a bit clumsily. I fly to join them and my guru is telling his students how they need to improve their flying skills. Some of them are really at basic level. Managed to jump down here, but lit off, no way. So I show off by flying graciously around, as a dolphin swimming in the ocean. I flip, I swirl, I go up and down, pass by them high speed. Oh, ego.... then I realise above us is not the sky but very high ceiling, kilometres high ceiling. I go there and put my feet on it, trying to walk on it like a fly.
      Then I remember the reversed gravity trick, which I never tried and decide to put it t test. I think about the guys down there who might get hurt, but at least my guru will for sure be just fine. Still I make a wish that nobody gets hurt and I say “reversed gravity” and all of the people and objects that were down below start to fall to the ceiling and I laugh, as it is quite amusing. Then I reverse it again.
      I go back to the ground and everybody is dispersing, to practice on their own, I guess. I find my guru sitting under a tree and go meet him. He asks me why I am so persistent in following him? What do I want from him? Do I want to marry him? I laugh and say no. I tell him with this exact words “No, I don’t want to marry you, I’m simply hungry and thirsty (of knowledge)” and I feel it in my heart with 100% conviction. He smiles, like I just gave the right answer and he tells me not be so impatient. He tells me things will happen on due time and that I had to understand that I am already having privileged access to him and that I should think about that. Then he gets up and goes away and I wake up.


      6:55 GMT – Wake up

      (I guess at 7 a.m. he needed to be at the casern )

      Updated 09-24-2010 at 11:29 PM by 34880

      Categories
      dream fragment , lucid , non-lucid , task of the month
    3. 19 Sep: Dad and elevator task

      by , 09-24-2010 at 06:07 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING PRECOG

      24:00 GMT – sleep

      Dad talk
      My grandfather passes by and I smile at him as I don’t find anything to say to him. I feel sad about it.
      Then I’m with my dad discussing practical stuff.
      He says if he goes to work on Friday he stays. Then he can go earlier on Monday with me to the doctor. Then I ask what does he mean, as there’s a weekend between (don’t want him to stay for the weekend...) and he says it is just better for him, he uses time better by staying with me instead of just meeting me on monday.
      Then we hear some mambo music and we try to dance it., although it is not really working out well. My dad asks “Shouldn’t you know this stuff?” and I reply sarcastically “Off course, because if one day the world ends while I’m here, at least I know how to mambo, which is crucial:” But I know he is refering to my dance classes, years ago.


      4:30 GMT

      Elevator task
      Still with my dad, at what used to be our home. All totally normal, but then the building starts falling forward (a recurrent dream I had for many years). He freaks out but I think it must be a dream. Then all happens in slow motion and I tell him not to worry, because it is just a dream, but he doesn’t believe me. As the building falls, I feel cool, I do RC and conclude beyond doubts it is a dream.
      When the building is on the ground, I get out through some window and find myself landing over a wooden table in the middle of some wood. Over there there are some other girls, one is Vera and the others are some british friends of her. My father is still hanging around and I try that he understands it’s just a dream. I feel euphoric and start singing and dancing on the table. He thinks I’m crazy and disappears. The girls join me and we put up quite a show. But then I see our reflexes on some glass and we are all enormously fat. But I don’t allow this trick of the mind to distract me. I’m lucid and I must make good use of it. I think about the tasks. What is there for me to do?
      Oh, the elevator! I summon an elevator and turn to find it there, in the middle of the grass. It is green, the brand is Otis (just like the elevator of my old home), it has one button to open the sliding doors and inside lots of buttons for about 6 floors. But I had previously decided (awake) I would not push any specific floor as I wanted to be surprised. And I was, the elevator started moving without me touching anything. Strangely enough, it doesn’t go up or down, it just goes sideways, like a car. It drives me through the woods and gets into a road. Traffic around me, we pass under the Lisbon aqueduct. I feel a bit disappointed with the outcome, but the task implies not to control where it goes, but just to see where it takes me, so I comply. I almost lose lucidity here, almost wake up, but continue. The elevator stops at some car park and by my side is a 50’s looking car with some black guy inside, leaning through his window. He flirts with me and asks me out. I say no thanks. Then I realise I’m two girls – the other me is also a 50’s looking girl. We smile at each other and we tell him we have other type of interests in life. We’re both thinking of LDs. He doesn’t understand, thinks we’re crazy, maybe gay, maybe belonging to some cult. Everybody around us is dressing like the 50s and then the dream starts fading away.


      8:30 GMT – Wake up


      PRECOG explanation:
      - just today my father called me and was with this strange conversation about his plans to start working (he is retired, he was mentioning some personal projects he's working on) on fridays or mondays or whatever (I was distracted and didn't really grasp it) and that this way he can be with me on weekends and help me out with some project I'm working on. I freaked out thinking I have to have him over every weekend! I love him, but no.

      Updated 09-24-2010 at 06:11 PM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , task of the month