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    Memorable Dreams

    1. 12 Oct: Asian stranger, flowers blossoming from my body, celestial palace

      by , 10-12-2019 at 09:07 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      It's night, the light in my garage turns on and I take a peak through the window. I see a guy inside my fence, by the gate near the pine tree. I can tell he is Asian and is wearing sunglasses, which is bizarre. I knock on the window and make a face like " hey, what are you doing here?" and he runs away, exiting through the gate. I get out and go after him. As soon as I turn on the road after my house to follow him, there is a building and he goes up a central staircase, many stories high. I look up to spot him but soon I lose him because there are many other people going up and down.

      At my mom's. She is in the bathroom and I am in my old bedroom. I feel an itch on my legs and realize I have a few infected pores. As I watch it closely, more and more pores are getting weird, purplish, engorging, becoming furuncules. They grow so large, they become like mushrooms. I pop some of them. It is disgusting.
      [COLOR="#FF0000"]But I realize I am dreaming. So just for fun, I turn the mushroom furuncules into flowers. At first it is not so easy to do it, but once I get the gist, I enjoy a wave of all types of flowers in all the colors of the rainbow, sprouting through my skin and blossoming and then giving way to other flowers. It is ticklish, I really feel them bursting out and growing, it is a strange and wonderful sensation. Also it is so incredibly beautiful to watch. As a final touch, I look to the palms of my hands and visualize a lotus flower blossoming in each of them. They do appear, one white lotus in each hand, first the leafs, then the flowers opening. Then I feel so light and glowy and I naturally start floating. I want to cross the wall and fly away but my mom calls for me and I turn back, because I don't want to scare her, even if it's in a dream. On the hallway I find my friend Belchior instead of my mom. He smiles at me, doesn't say a word and I realize there is nothing keeping me here. I keep floating on air and I feel like I am expanding in size. The ceiling can't contain me. I cross through the wall and ceiling and I am floating outside. Not like flying with effort or conscientiously, just standing weightless in the air. I can see my feet. Then I see a golden throne set up in the middle of the street in front of my mom's building. I float towards it and notice a golden Buddha statue which I touch and then I am inside four walls. It is an all white and gold room, marble floors and walls, rich golden curtains and sofas and beautiful big Buddha statues everywhere, in gold or white stone, in Tibetan, Thai and other styles. There is a panoramic window to a garden outside and passageways to other rooms. An Asian man comes in in servants clothing and welcomes me. Then a few ladies also appear, with foods to serve or just offering their services. I am a bit overwhelmed and then two beautiful cats come strutting in my direction. This feels like heave and I feel that I could stay here forever and just be pampered. But why and for what? Then I wonder where this servants come from? Do they have a life and a family? Why do they work for me? Do they suffer? I can't accept having servants. I could not enjoy paradise.
      I go outside to the garden. There is a glass wall separating it from some corridors that go around it and where normal people are circulating and going somewhere. I spot a girl I seem to know and I have a dejŠ vu. I feel like I have been here before and have seen that girl before in that exact place, but in a somewhat different situation, one in which I was her equal. But now I am separated by a wall, in a garden with waterfalls and she looks lonely and sad. I do something that breaks the separation and now they all can see me and come inside the garden. I try to talk to the girl, but it becomes quite chaotic with people talking in groups, mingling and hanging out. There is one one dude going around imitating a cow mooing.

      At some nice Portuguese town, on a break from some professional training I am attending but which I do not care about at all. The lady that usually assists me at the parish council, sees me and comes talk to me about how good this training is and professional opportunities that might arise from it and I'm like "oh c'mon, I dont give a shit about it and I am not even staying 'till the end". She is a bit shocked.
      I go to the next door, which is a clinic of sorts and check their vending machine at the entrance for some snacks. Also at the entrance are a few patients freaking out because the electronic system that registers the patients is down and they can't get to their appointment. I calm them down and I feel compassion for them and somehow I create the conditions for the system to be fixed.


      Then outside again I see Rinpoche coming down the street with the usual entourage and I bow down as he passes by. He enters the next door and some people enter after him and close it behind, while others stay outside guarding the entrance. I feel bold and uninhibited and I say to them I'd like to go in. They say definitely no and then they also go inside and shut the door again. So I put my hand through the door and I hear them freaking out. They still don't open. So I just cut out a hole on the door with my fingers so I can look inside. Rinpoche is in another room deeper inside. I finally manage to go inside so they let me sit at a desk alongside other people waiting for a chance to meet Rinpoche.
    2. 23 Jul: Earthquake at my mom's and Indian goddess again

      by , 07-23-2019 at 09:35 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      At my moms, although a slightly different house. It is in the middle of a city. But still at the top floor. On her room is my late grandma, still alive, laying in bed. I am with her. On the next room is my mom, my dad and some other relatives. The wall separating the two rooms cracks horizontally. My dad thinks the house will crack more and I think there has to be a reason behind it. That's when everything starts shaking. Through the window we see other buildings shaking violently and breaking apart. My dog Soraia is with us, I keep her near. Parts of our house start to collapse, like some outer walls. My grandma on the bed falls down with part of the room. My mom cries in panic. I suggest we all move to under the doorstep. When finally things are more stable, we assess the damages in the house. After the shock I say it is time to go outside because is dangerous to stay. My mom offers to go down the building's staircase and I say it should be me going, because I think it is dangerous for her. She insists and I warn her that she might find dead people. We hear a child cry somewhere on the floors below. She goes anyway. I gather my cats on a crate. Fairly easy to do except for Cuscus which forces me to go to the collapsed room looking for him. Meanwhile my mom returns, says the stairs are blocked 2 floors below. Couldn't find the child. We consider staying there until rescue comes but it might take weeks and it is not safe. So we find there is a connection between the roof to other rooftops of buildings that fell over each other. Through there I find ta way for us to reach the street. Most people seem disoriented but we find a group which seems to have a plan and knows where to go. I consider we join them. Then I am warned that some bad dudes are trying to steal one of my pets from where I left them in crates, near a car. But it is not a cat they are taking away, it is a falcon. I run and insult them but eventually the falcon flies away and escapes them. Then I call him back and he lands on my arm.


      With friends, at some ancient site, like a temple or palace, awaiting for our Guru's teachings. As we wait for info about what's going to happen, Rinpoche drops by and hands over a bunch of papers with poems. He says we should go make copies, distribute them and study the texts. Then he turns away to leave, but our eyes cross and I understand I should follow him. I follow him through a corridor, I stop seeing, everything is dark and then it's like I enter another time and dimension. The floor is covered in flowers and on both sides of the aisle there are people throwing flower petals and offering precious substances. I spot Rinpoche again at the end of this path and at the entrance of a private garden area. When we are there alone, we kiss. He becomes a young, athletic, beautiful prince, with long hair with a bit tied up on top of his head. I also turn into an Indian looking princess-like beauty with a vaporous white dress. We enjoy the sensual delights of being alone and free to love in this solitary magical retreat. Apparently for a long undisturbed time. We have a son. At some occasion I am bathing in a lake and playing with my boy. From a short distance, I see my love looking at us, very serious. He is majestic and he carries a dagger in his right hand. As he walks towards me, I get in some kind of horny surrendering trance. I get out of the water and I lay down on a stone surface and welcome him in my arms. He lays down with me. But he is talking very seriously about people in some other time and dimension. He says with aggravation that they will at some point stop going to temples and looking for us. They will instead go to shopping and movies and other mundane things and we will have to be with them, among them, doing those things with them, for them. Then I black out and start drifting in what I would describe as the multiverse, a dark void where a myriad of universes are laid out in an infinite geometrical matrix and I see them unfolding in their infinite diversity, overwhelmed.

      Updated 07-24-2019 at 10:30 PM by 34880

      Categories
      memorable , dream fragment , non-lucid
    3. 16 May: Earth after our civilization collapses

      by , 05-16-2019 at 02:21 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      I am being shown future human civilization but not sure if it is on planet Earth. First is just an overview of what seem like an industrial exploration on another planet, similar to Earth or one that has been terraformed.
      There is a huge plateau with giant machines like trucks with in built platforms, and they can pick up shuttles and carry them to a place near the edge of this plateau and then tilt the platform they are on, so they are launched into space.
      Below this platform, the planet is green and luxurious, but this area is covered in roads, machines, big trucks and shuttles, just like an interface to ship materials in and out of the planet.
      I wonder if people live there. And then past this plateau and entering the forest I do find people and settlements. They live in small, almost primitive looking villages, with houses that look like Mayan and Incan pyramids, but then seen from a different angle, they have large panoramic windows, like bioclimatic houses that blend in the environment. They farm, but the way they have their plantations integrated in the natural environment is so beautiful and artistic that it makes me cry. People look like Celts and I wonder if these are just the hippies of this era, yet they have just the right amount of high tech facilitating their way of life, which is very discreet. People are gathering and walking towards a stone path, made with large flat basalt stones going uphill and I am told it's some kind of religious celebration day and they head to some kind of temple. But what I find is an old city, with the old buildings, the beautiful ones from 20th century and before, totally preserved and being used, alongside avenues of old uglier buildings abandoned, in ruins and apparently just being displayed as an open air museum.
      I recognize one street as Avenue Jo„o XXI in Lisbon, still with some billboards from banks and other institutions hanging behind their glass walls, but the outside is very decrepit, the concrete is worn out, paint is gone, walls look very grey, covered in dirt and metal parts are rusting. Then I am invited to sit at a nice cafť in one of the recovered building where they serve cookies and cakes from the past, according to recipes they have preserved. But all this left me emotional and I have no hunger. They insist that I sit and just enjoy and they start bringing me samples of cookies and I do feel so much better.
    4. 26 Mar: Being an Indian goddess

      by , 03-26-2019 at 09:50 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      I live in some ruined temple, like a spirit or ghost, kind of dreamy detachment, not interacting with humans for ages. I am balancing on a swing in a large inner courtyard and singing a song in a traditional Indian style. Then some kind of holy man comes by and sees me. He takes me for a goddess, bows down and worships me. He says my name, something starting with an "S" and kind of long, like Saraswati, but with a couple of "M" in the middle. Slowly I start recalling being this goddess and I feel immensely melancholic, with all the sorrows of the world in my heart. He runs to tell everyone that this goddess is back, thousands come to see me.
      But one man or demon doubts that I am immortal or hates me, so he shoots an arrow at me. I feel pain and he takes it as proof that I am no goddess. Then another man throws another arrow, and another and so forth. The pain is unbearable, but I dont feel that I am dying. Then people who stand by my side also start throwing arrows at the attackers and it seems the whole humanity is fighting, until I fall into the ground, more sad than hurt. Then some men and women around me stop shooting arrows and simply take care of protecting me and taking me to a safe place. They take care of me, remove the arrows with so much love and devotion and I feel better again. The man who threw the first arrow is killed and the fight stops. They bring me back to the temple and organize to take care of me and provide me what I need. I have a room, which looks more like a storage room of antiques, filled with ancient treasures, maybe offerings from my devotees. I feel so tired, I just want people to leave me there quietly alone for eons. But people can't just be quiet, they keep coming to visit me, looking for me, wanting to talk to me.. But I'm like a delicate flower, they shouldn't come close, they shouldn't touch me or talk to me. I stay in absolute silence whenever they address me and I finally decide I need to leave again from this human realm. It's too heavy for me. I hide in a moldy wardrobe, they think I am playing hide and seek and eventually take a peak inside. But I am no longer there. I just needed a dark quiet place to slowly float away to another plane. I can see them as if I am still sitting in the wardrobe, but I am nowhere and everywhere, until humanity needs me and deserves me some day. Then I'll reemerge.
    5. 5 Jan: LDs, flying through majestic surreal landscapes and making out with my teacher

      by , 01-05-2019 at 10:38 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      At some house, looking through clothes my mom found in trash, then also some toys which are to be donated to a kindergarten, checking if they are complete and playing a bit with some of the games.
      Then for no reason I see my teacher sitting at the end of this room, with it's back turned to me and I get lucid.
      I go towards him and surprise him by touching him softly in his back. He is wearing a light brown shirt and he looks to the side to see me. I move my hand down his arm and gently caress him. He shuts his eyes in total surrender. So I kiss him. I notice his lips a bit dry, but soon our salivas mix and our tongues intertwine, while I caress his shaved head. I enjoy every bit of it.
      Then I realize there is someone else in the room. We stop and I turn to this person. It looks like my dad, he doesn't seem to recognize me. He turns away quickly and heads to a door. As he opens the door, he looks back one more time and his physiognomy changed. He is taller, slimmer, more tanned and dresses like an Indian man. I follow him but lose him in the movement of people outside. My attention also gets drawn by the majestic landscape and I don't follow the man anymore. In front of me are some amazing mountains covered in luscious green vegetation. And there are people going up and down the mountains, apparently carrying things, picking up fruits, going about many different activities. Strangely, the mountains seem extremely tall ,but people have the same apparent dimension whether they are at the top of it or down at its base. I see a huge strange black bird flying over my head. It is the size of a big eagle, it has a beak like a toucan and strange wings that make a half-moon shape with the first two feathers on each side slightly round and color red. I follow its flight and to my left I see what seem like clouds made of liquid water, which give the impression that everything beneath it, is underwater. There is a type of tree whose top touches the liquid cloud and behaves like kelp in the ocean. Then I turn my attention again to the mountains. I realize the contours of the mountains, the hills and valleys, the rocky surfaces, are all fractal shaped. I decide to take off and fly to see it up close. I am mesmerized by these patterns, and the psychedelic colors they have and then I almost wake up,
      but instead I have a FA in a totally white empty house. I remember I left my teacher back in the other house and I go around this house calling out his name, hoping to summon him back. Going through some corridor I spot someone that looks like him and other people going after, but when I get closer, it isn't him. But he is also a teacher to these people, who admire him and are respectfully walking him out as he leaves. I am starting to feel the LD fading away, so I decide to get out of here and do my own hing. I find a window and jump to outside. It's again a beautiful landscape with green hills, but this house is right on the slope. I have to climb some moss covered rocks to reach the top of the hill. Some lady who had made some comment to me inside, followed me out the window and insists on asking me something about mind training. Something like, if I feel that realization is a consequence of how much time you practice. If it is an inevitable consequence of your time dedication to practice, because she is feeling frustrated for not seeing results. I don't remember exact words I said, it was very short answer, but it was something in the line of "no, it's not just time related, more about quality and merit."
      Then on the top of the hill I see a valley below, but really far below, like we are many kms of altitude up. I decide to jump and fly some more. I enjoy it for some time, once again absorbing the details of the majestic landscape. Until I start descending and land in some city below. I land in a town square between some classical buildings and there is a giant painting on the floor with a reproduction of some classical work of art. I dig my hands in the floor and have fun picking up elements from the painting and throwing them in the air to watch them slowly fall like confetti. Then I want the painting to become a giant trampoline and I have fun jumping and doing flips in the air.

      When I am done with it, I walk down a street. The LD is weaker and I don't remember exactly what happened but I end up in a TV studio, where a famous morning show is being recorded and I am sitting with the live audience. The show hostess is demonstrating some modern appliances and its uses and we are offered some bread cooked by a bread machine. I taste it and it is completely bland and tasteless. I feel this is boring and once again I aim for a window to change scenario At some corridor outside the recording area, I see a window. I look through it and down below I see a moat or a lake. I am about to jump to it, when I notice it is full of big animals swimming. First they look like crocs, but on a closer look, I see they are mainly big fish, turtles and some mutant creatures, like fish but with tiny arms and hands. I decide to go get the tasteless bread and feed it to the animals. The bread wasn't a lot but seems to multiply as I split it into bits, so I keep feeding the animals for quite a while. Then I wake up. .
    6. 30 Nov: In love with my best friend who is marrying a girl I hate

      by , 11-30-2018 at 03:52 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening


      There is an earthquake or something. Everybody gets evacuated from home, but I go back to get some food. I had some giant potatoes cooked and ready to eat which I store in plastic containers to take. The building starts swinging side to side, collapsing but I stop the swinging by playing as a counterweight (duh).
      Outside people are jamming the roads, everybody is dressed like the 50's.

      My best friend is having his wedding in a castle. I am actually in love with him but never told him. He looks like Chris Pine and his girlfriend is Jennifer Garner. I don't like her, we have a history and she must have skeletons in the closet. Some guy she knows appears before the wedding and kidnaps her with intention to rape her. My friend goes after them, but he gets injured in a leg and can't keep up. The bad guy sees a chance and hangs him. His ghost comes to me and takes me to where his body is. But he is not yet completely dead, stuck in a limbo, I do CPR and I save him. Then he goes to save his future wife.
      Later on, with his girlfriend safe, we're back in his room where he thanks me for saving him. His eyes are full of love. I go away and another friend who was watching at the door tells me that we should have kissed right there, because he clearly is in love with me and would not go through with the wedding. I tell him I couldn't do it, I didn't want to ruin his wedding. If he hadn't figured it out before, too late. Still, I have hopes that he will come after me, but he does not.
      I go down some spiral staircase and end up in a patio where I scream out of my lungs that I love him.
      I start getting lucid, realize the details and clarity of the scenario and enjoy being in that state for a while.
      (woke up)

      In some holiday place with a bunch of guys who do not seem really happy to have me with them. One of them is a surfer and he says let's go to the beach and he will teach us how to surf. I say I'd like to, he looks annoyed, but doesn't know how to decline.
      We are staying in some type of dorm and downstairs there's a kind of shuttle pods on rails that take us directly to the beach. He takes us to a small and hidden beach that looks heaven. I try to take pictures of this place but can't find my phone.

      (wake up)

      Some scenes with my father and me testing a new precinct for my dogs, with individual kennels and a common area and access to a lake. The dogs are happy. I have trouble directing them to the kennels and some find a door open in the back and run to the lake. But it's fine and all my dogs are gathered there and not fighting so I am happy too.

      Then at some place like a restaurant cleaning up a mess, raw eggs and soup all over the floor. Maybe I work there, not sure. I get to a backroom, with the cleaning stuff and I have a close encounter with a vampire. Not a human like, but a Nosferatu bat-like vampire with wings. He is flying from place rt place, trying to bite me. But I somehow affect him with a strong light and throwing on him an acid used for cleaning. At some point he is actually scared and trying to run away. I guess I owned him.

      Visiting the restaurant of my friend Ax-man. He moved his business to a new place, much larger, also very different, but he seems to be having success. Lots of kids from college go there for lunch, it's quite noisy and chaotic. It has long rooms one after the other, connected by ramps. But kids push it a bit too far. There is one skating through the ramps to the exit. I know him, he is a good kid, but I scold him and he runs away. At the entrance, my friend (the one I am in love with) is entering and is hit by the skater. Now he doesn't look like Chris Pine anymore, now he is black, like another actor I can't remember right now. He and the kid fall down. As I run to help him, I also fall down on them. We're all ok, the skater kid goes away and we both laugh at it, still all twisted on the ground. He insists on checking my ankles and massaging my legs and I know right there, seated on the ground with him, that he is in love with me but doesn't want to admit it.

      I reminisce memories from time in school. I was bullied by the girl he is now going to marry. Once she scared me with a knife at the cafeteria. She was the popular girl, but she felt threatened by me. For example, I was a great gymnast and I beat her once at a competition. When I was on stage receiving a medal, she was in front row in the audience, looking like she could kill me.

      Again with the dudes, that I now understand are my friend's groomsmen and also kids who disliked me in school. They can't help gazing at my body as I undress, but also seem to really detest me, because as we grew up I was the nerdy ugly duckling they despised. We all went swimming and I am way ahead of them, but stop to give them a chance to reach me. They basically almost went over me and couldn't care if I drowned. I realized we were never going to be friends.
      At night we are joined by the groom. The boys are all a bit drunk and so I lead them to a shady cabaret on a basement. It's not innocent, I know what this place is. I enter through the artists door and I ask them them to wait outside. This place is a den of vampires, all which I know and are my friends. I talked to them and say I brought preys. But before, they will watch me as I perform on stage. Their chins will drop and then they'll die. But I explicitly tell my vampires friends to leave the cute one out of it, because he is mine.
    7. 18 Nov: Small enlightenment and rebirth

      by , 11-19-2018 at 11:12 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      Looking to attend my guru's teachings. Not sure if I will see him, because I just dropped by and was not invited, so I decide to explore the place a little bit and see if I encounter him by chance. I risk going through an area I am not supposed to enter. I come across a few monks and lamas on a hallway and before they see me, I go down a flight of stairs that lead me to a sort of chamber where some people are seated waiting for an audience with my teacher. Nobody sees me as I hide under a table covered in a cloth. At the opposite side of this room there is an opening to outside and I spot my teacher arriving with a group of people. I am watching through a gap in the cloth and I notice that although he is talking with the people on his group, his eyes are looking in my direction and I know that he knows that I am hiding there. I feel there is no need to keep hiding, so I come out and join the other people in sitting on the floor in front of a low wooden stage. My teacher comes to talk to people but he chooses to sit on directly on the floor of the stage, right in front of me. Since his eyes locked with mine, he hasn't let go and I feel as if he is inside me. I feel dizzier as he comes closer, so close I stop feeling there's a separation between us. I become sort of lucid, not exactly, it is more like a small enlightenment. I feel so light that a breeze pushes me through the ground and slowly it elevates me in the air, seated in half-lotus position. I just go with the wind, I cross walls and tree trunks and rise up in the air. I rise and rise until I am in outer space, surrounded by darkness with the dim lights of the stars shining far away. Then I go across the fabric of the universe itself, until all shapes and forms start to disappear one by one. All of my memories fade like 2D pictures dissolving in a black background. I let go all of them. But then I panic. I don't want to lose my teacher's memory. I hold on to his memory. And as I do it, a faint vision of a table and a chair become stronger in front of me and I grab the chair and sit, to stabilize this reference. I grab the table and try to recall familiar things. Then from the table, embedded in it, a dark male figure rises, kinda demonic, but I feel it is also the help I need to go back. He wants to know what I want. I state clearly that I have to go back to my teacher, no matter the time or place, just meeting him again.
      He says no way, that's gone, now I am stuck here forever in this limbo. But I insist on coming back to my teacher. I recall the time I last saw him, but any other time and space will do. He gets mad and disappears. Around me a scenario of an office starts to take shape. I get up and walk around until I find a couple ladies at a booth, like a ticket booth at a train station and they ask me my destination. They ask date and exact hour. I don't know. I feel a bit confused. They yell there is no time for hesitations. Only a few seconds for the time to be set. I could see in a screen random numbers starting to form a date and I shout my actual birth date and as I am saying the hours, I am already feeling a pull and I am thrown back on planet earth. As I approach I see the clouds, rocks, majestic ocean waves, buildings and people and I feel an intense happiness that I will be meeting my teacher again.

      Updated 11-19-2018 at 11:16 PM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , memorable
    8. 17 Nov: forced labor farm under Nazi rule

      by , 11-17-2014 at 01:48 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      I live and work at a farm, possibly in Germany. The owner is a nazi sympathizer or at least that's my impression of him, since he seems to be well integrated in the nazi society. Most of the farm workers are jews, men, women and children, forced to labor like slaves. Their life conditions are miserable and I do my best to help them. I am also a worker, not jew, but of a lower class than my boss. He is in love with me and I am his mistress, but he can't have a serious and socially accepted relationship with me due to my humble origins. Also, I don't love him, I just tolerate his sexual advances because he provides me some privileges and I also use it to manipulate him, for instance, to better the conditions of the forced workers. I feel a lot of empathy for these people and I am particularly fond of the children, especially a little orphan 2-year old girl, whom I love like my own child.
      The boss is a bit obsessed with dressing me up with pretty lingerie and sometimes I feel sick with how he shows me off in underwear and analyzes me in front of his best friend while they are having lunch, for example. He treats me like a sex toy. But when he is pleased, I can get him to agree on certain things, like providing hot baths for the jews, when previously they only had cold showers, even in the winter. He allows the german house workers to heat up large pots of water to fill in the bathtub for the jews to take a bath if they wish. But when I tell them the news, only a couple of them accepts happily the offer. The others are suspicious, as if afraid that if they take it, something bad will happen to them later as punishment. I don't understand and feel disappointed.
      One day some nazi guys come for a visit and insist on taking a picture of the farm workers all lined up. As usual, I serve as intermediary, because they like me and they trust me. I sense much nervousness in them and the children feel the tension and start crying. I tell them it's just a photo, no reason to be afraid and with somber faces they line up. But the 2-year old baby is restless and the lady who is holding her can't keep her quiet, so I step in the line up and hold the baby in my arms, as only I can quiet her down. Her eyes are full of fear as if she can sense something that I can't. I feel so much love and compassion for this baby. I hold her in my arms with unconditional love as they take the picture with me included.
      Life goes back to normal, until one day my boss gives me some money to go buy some pretty clothes in the village or town nearby. When I return at the end of the day, I find all the jewish workers screaming and crying inside a truck, being taken like cattle to the slaughterhouse. I freak out, I try to stop the truck, I plead to my boss, but he is also upset, it is not in his hands. I didn't think he cared much for the jews, but he didn't hate them either and found useful to have them as a free work force. But then I realized that deep down, he had started to apprecciate the idea that they were in a safe environment at his farm and that he could save their lives. But there were superior orders that they'd be taken somewhere else and I learned the ugly truth of what was going on with the jews.
      Much later, we left the farm and the country. My boss and a couple of his friends, who no longer could take part of what was going on in their country, flew to Havana and he took me with him. I could feel a difference in him and I started being treated more like equal. We started a new life, leaving the suffering behind. I took refuge in the experience of an exotic country and other life realities to try to forget the unfortunate people I had left behind.
    9. 13 Sep: bloody union with the guru

      by , 09-13-2014 at 02:45 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      This one is both erotic and gross, so be warned.

      I am attending my guru's teachings but it turns into something else. He is performing something like an empowerment and then he directs his attention to me, by making a reference only I understand. Then he throws a kind of ritual cover with buddhist symbols over my lap. It seems random or accidental, but I am starting to think maybe not. Then he recites something nysterious and a lady on his left side, who is helping with the ritual, finishes with a sort of wishful phrasing like "may your wish be fulfilled" meant for the guru.
      After this event, as night falls, I feel light headed and eerie and an urge to go somewhere. I feel fluid and like walking on clouds. I move like dancing, but I don't know where I am going. I feel like I'm being drawn somewhere until I actually feel like a real hand guiding all my movements. It's a warm and gentle hand. I submit willingfully.

      I arrive at a place with a couple of guards by a door, but the door is wide open and there's someone descending a staircase. It is my guru, but a god-like version of him, skin so flawless as made of metal. And he is completely naked, using only adornments around his waist, neck and head. On one hand he has pointy silvered fingernails. He embraces me, I feel his warmth and smoothness. He removes my dress with just a touch and turns me around. We're both naked in front of a mirror. He kisses me and caresses me. I feel horny like crazy, I'm panting with desire. Then he pierces my left ear lobe with his silver fingernails and starts sucking my blood. At the same time he penetrates me from behind. He says calmly "I'm in". I'm lost in ecstasy, I have never felt like this before.
      I am about to explode with pleasure when he tells me "do not come". He pulls out of me and tells me to simply let the blood come out. I'm not sure what he means. I know he means blood coming out of my "secret place", I just wonder why. Then he disappears, leaving me in an indescribable state. I feel drained and exhausted, yet, in a climax like no other I've ever experienced. I feel like he went to the deepest inside me and became part of it. I feel like I died and I am reborn again.

      When I wake up, I still linger on that feeling and emotion and feel exhausted and exhilarated at the same time.
      Meanwhile, my period came. Odd timing.
    10. 03 June: how in a future life I'll come to live in Mars

      by , 06-03-2014 at 02:36 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      The time is a near future and I am a poor orphan girl, living in a slum. The largest chunk of the population lives below poverty line, only an elite gets access to a good life, with all comforts and technologies.
      One day a couple of scientists from this elite is kidnapped with their daughter by a group of boys who take them to their headquarters in the woods. I happen to watch everything and I follow them secretely. They reach a kind of pyramidal fortress and their leader is a cute blonde girl protected by her own elite female warriors. The boys bow to her, the ladies are clearly the rulers of this gang.
      I stick around hidden and I manage to help the couple and their daughter escape and go back to their protected world. I become friend of their daughter and we keep in touch. She learns that the gang found out I released their prisoners and they are now bullying me and my life is at risk. One day I inform her that I am in danger and have to run and hide. That's when she comes to help me and takes me to her parents presence.
      They felt in debt towards me, but I had never accepted anything from them, so now they offer that I stay with them, with no deadline to go away. As long as I want, I can stay with them. I get used to the good life. Soon after they go on vacation to a beach resort and take me with them. We travel by tele-transportation. We basically enter what I thought to be an elevator, but when the door opens, we're at this beach. On the beach, the elevator is cloacked to be invisible against the landscape. I am amazed with all this technology and they are surprised to know about how low tech the life of the rest of us is. We're basically stuck with the gadgets from the beginnings of the XXI century and haven't had access to anything more high tech than that.
      The couple of scientists has been working on some big study of some space objects that seem potential threats to our planet.
      One day there's a meteor shower and a large meteorite hits the ground somewhere on the planet and they start making observations and calculations and moving towards an ever more likely scenario of a nearby asteroid or something coming to hit us. Then I see like an aurora in the sky and they panic. I don't know what it means to them, but they start preparing to leave and try desperately to reach another family with whom they are friends with. Apparently there's an evacuation plan for an elite of the elite and both those families were allowed to embark on a ship heading out of the planet. I am feeling lost in the middle of this chaos and certain that they'll leave me behind, but since they can't reach the other family and they owe me their lives, they take me along in their places. That's how I escape an E.L.E. on Earth and from being and orphan on the slum I go to become one of the very few Earth's refugees in a colony on Mars, where I am raised and educated as one of their own.
    11. 15 Mar: dystopian world

      by , 03-15-2014 at 09:41 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      (...) I share the house with my whole family. Parents, grandparents, I even have to share my room with my best friend. Life is ok, just a bit crowded and back to the basics.
      One day, my friend and I meet a handsome stranger, who coincidentally looks just like Matt Damon. He seems a bit lost and he needs a place to crash, so we offer him to stay in our room for the night. He is so cute, I realize both my friend and I are doing shifts in trying to seduce him, but he is just not that interested.
      The next day he takes us to his hood. It's in a part of town where people are even poorer than us. He shows us a community centre, where people help each other out and meals are cooked and served to the masses. A lady is stirring corn porridge in a giant cooker and people line up to get some. But still, they seem happy, some are dancing after eating, there's nice music, a festive environment. That's when a strange looking group appears. They almost seem like buddhist monks and lamas, with long red and orange vests, trumpet sounds and banners in the wind. Everybody bows down and folds their hands when their "spiritual leader" comes up in front. I am still stunned by the whole thing and I feel genuine devotion, but the guy doesn't seem too friendly. He gives orders for a random selection of the people and I'm caught in the group. We are guided through this festive troupe of musicians and dancers to a sort ot transportation tunnel system and as I walk into it, I feel honoured for having been chosen. But the transport drops us directly into what looks like the posh downtown area, with buildings, terraces, roads, squares, but no people walking around. I find strange, until a white car comes in racing and hitting as many of us as it possibly can. I realize this is a cross between hungry games and mad max. Someone must be watching and having fun as we are killed. But I don't go down that easily. I run, I jump, I do whatever is necessary to escape and at some point I manage to create a trap for the car and he hits and gets stuck at some concrete structure I lured it into.
      The driver gets out of the car, pissed, but he just leaves. In his place appear two large guys who plan to beat me up, the old fashioned way. I avoid all their hits and I hit back. But they are both bigger and stronger than me. My hist don't seem to hurt them much. The bigger one is laughing at me, and asks me what martial art am I practicing. I reply that I'm not following any, I'm just using my intuition. He says my intuition will not help me for so long.
      That's when we hear a loud noise and we look up. What seem to be two police helicopters, with no helices and joined together by some sort of bridge, draws a circle in the air, passes over our heads and flies in the direction of a huge building in the horizon, which I see now for the first time. It is a big block of concrete and glass windows, with a semi-circular and horizontal highpass on the top pf the building. I know that is the headquarters of the central power. And the helis are going straight into it. But I think "if history taught us a lesson is that a plane crashing into a building will not make it collapse". But the helis were clearly modified and probably contained a lot of explosive stuff, because soon after they crashed into the building, there were a series of explosions that made the building collapse. As the debris are flying in all directions, the few people around start running away in fear.
      We run and run, until we leave this dowtown area behind, and cross the hoods, and more people joining the run, and crossing barriers that used to divide the zones. Until some of us reach the most outer area, a place with a really bad vibe, empty concrete buildings with no glass on the windows. I hide in a building for a while, to avoid breathing all the dust that is outside and to have some rest from all the events. but I feel a presence. There's someone patrolling the building and it seems to be very dangerous. I go from room to room trying to keep ahead of it, but I encounter signs of something horrific. Heads and other body parts scattered around. A bloody smell. And then I am at the door of a room where lots of people sleep on the floor, but they don't look quite human. They are indeed a cannibal zombie like pack. I got to be careful not to wake them up. That's when an army of clone androids bursts in and starts shooting all over the place. I use the opportunity to run.
      I keep running, I meet again some other people who are also running. We're looking for the outer rim. We're hoping it might be collapsed or defenseless, so we can go out and see what's outside this world. We encounter this giant wall. It seems to have a top, but as we climb, it just continues to go and go and never end. But some clever guy notices something about a technical compartment halfway in the wall. He manages to open it and manipulate it to crash the intelligent system that continuously creates the wall. And it starts opening gaps and we see people down on the ground level being able to pass it through. So we go over it as well.
      The other side is countryside and there are still a few remote villages where people live simply and we join them.
      I go back for my family and after we settle in this brave new world, in a new house in the country, I watch my mom knitting and making crochet, more peaceful than ever.
    12. 30 Sep: Seeing the patterns

      by , 09-30-2013 at 08:28 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      I'm at some airport, but not a conventional one, either it's interplanetary or interdimensional. I was with some girl friends, but I loose them in the crowd. I end up in the restauration area and from there I walk out into an open area that I recognize from another dream I had some day. There's a stage and a girl is rehearsing for a concert later on. I keep walking up a dirt road because nature looks alien: there's a tree with raspberries the size of big apples and the soil looks like a creamy chocolate cake. As I watch the trees, their roots and branches and the river to my left, I notice patterns overlapping. The branches of a certain tree fit precisely against certain stars in the sky.
      A guy appears behind me and says "Can you see the patterns, repeated and interconnected?".
      "Yes, but if I move to a new position, I stop seeing this overlapping pattern, so it's just coincidental."
      "Look again, you'll just see new patterns emerging. No matter what angle you look at things, you will always find repeating and overlapping patterns, just different ones, infinite numbers."

      As we keep walking, I know I am dreaming, but it requires no reality check to confirm it or stabilize it. It holds very naturally and very clear. I actually feel that I can stay there forever. I realize how much I could learn if I decide to stay. I am decided to stay and unravel all the secrets of all the universes.
      But then I wonder what will happen to the girl body I have left sleeping on a bed... Will "I" enter a coma? Sleep for the rest of "my life"? What about my family and loved ones? I don't worry that I'll miss them, I worry that they'll suffer not understanding what is happening to "me". I feel obliged to come back. (Damn!)
      But for now I keep walking with this guy and he takes me to a really nice hostel in the mountain. My room faces a terrace over the river, that connects to other rooms. All is well on this peaceful place, I'm just contemplating nature, when a couple of men in black come out of another room, dragging my friend. When I approach to ask what they're doing, they tell me to go away or they'll take me to. One of them has some kind of weapon that points at me and I wake up.

      Updated 09-30-2013 at 08:31 PM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , memorable
    13. 10 Aug: Free fall

      by , 08-10-2012 at 11:13 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      (...) I am at the edge of a balcony, slightly aware I'm dreaming and making considerations about lucid dreams. I am not afraid of the height because I know I can fly or hover and will not hit the floor if I fall. But that's not enough. I realize that I need not to be afraid of hitting the floor, because there is no floor. I make an effort to become fully lucid to do an experiment. I let my body lean forward and just let go of all fears and all doubts. My body goes through the dream balcony and I free fall. I only feel the uncomfortable sensation in the stomach, of falling in the void, for about 2 seconds and then its gone. I see the ground closer and closer but I also go through it and then I'm free falling in the darkness. I don't make any effort to stop it, I let go completely.
      After a while, the falling sensation stops by itself and I find myself being laid out gently on a grassy patch under a tree at nightime. I feel peace and I feel like meditating. I decide to get up and do a walking meditation. I try to visualize a Buddha against the night sky. I can't. Instead I see a white light that starts from a point and expands into the shape of an angel like figure. From it I hear a "hello". The light shines brighter and I hear again "Hello, [my name]!". I recognize the voice of my guru. I don't just recognize his voice, I feel him! Hard to explain the entirety of what happens in these few moments. I feel overwhelmed. I wake up.
    14. 11 May: OBE or astral projection

      by , 05-11-2011 at 03:23 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      I think this morning I had my very first real conscious experience with OBE.
      I think it happened to me before, but I wasn't really aware of how it started.
      But really early this morning I woke up briefly in my bed from a lucid dream and as I started to plunge back into sleep, I heard a little buzz announcing sleep paralysis settling in. Two thoughts came to my mind: either I'd go with the flow or I'd move my hand a little bit to stop it, because I really don't like it and usually it doesn't take me anywhere anyway.
      I tried to move my hand, but so very little that it wouldn't actually interrupt my falling asleep, just the SP noises. As I did it, I felt like my left hand was indeed made of two hands, the physical one and a ghost-like hand. Always with my eyes closed, I focused on the ghost-hand feeling and soon I started to see my hand, my bed and the wall in front of me, although I kept my eyes closed. My body did enter sleep paralysis but I wasn't really asleep either. I decided to move my ghost-hand and I saw it separating from my physical hand. It was cool!
      Then I decided to get up, the whole body. I was lying sideways on the bed, over my left shoulder. So I tried to lift my ghostly head and left shoulder. Then "bam": I felt my "ghost" body separating from my physical body. It occurred to me it was an OBE.
      Excitement was taken over by vertigo, nausea and an extremely uncomfortable feeling. I felt like I was leaving my body and as an effect I was dying. Dying would be ok for me: I wasn't feeling any particular attachment to this body and this life. But then I remembered my mom who was sleeping as a guest on the living room and how much pain she and other people who love me would feel if I simply left. So, afraid of continuing with the process and not being able to come back, I laid down again, merged my two bodies and simply entered the sleep and lucid dream state.
      Later when I woke up I felt a bit stupid, because rumor has it that nobody really dies from OBE. But at that moment I wasn't so sure! It felt really real that I could die, but I know it's silly, so next time I'll try to go ahead with it.

      Updated 09-24-2011 at 09:58 AM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , memorable , side notes
    15. 15 Feb: Becoming a dragon and telling other dreamers about DV

      by , 02-22-2011 at 10:31 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING

      22:30

      Bus trip
      Iím involved in politics. Thereís a vote for me to have some vacation. I go on a bus trip and the driver is a black guy. He looks tired and I fear he might fall asleep while driving, although the trip is relatively short Ė about 40 mins Ė so I decide to trust his driving.

      Amityville-like haunted house
      With some other people on an apartment we believe to be haunted. We see a kind of specter of a scary man walking around on some security footage and it creeps us out. He makes lights flash and even burst the lamps. He seems to be able to control whoever he wants to control and lead people to their suicide. First victim is a girl we find hanged in a room, second victim a guy we find all broken for having fell down the stairs. Even the cat gets possessed. Someone decides to strike back by calling him and facing him, but then I see my mom and my BF and I take them with me to the kitchen and we close the door behind us. We are pretty scared because after a while we feel the spirit presence among us. I feel it physically as if he is touching me and it causes all kinds of horrifying feelings and visions. At some point I suspect Iím dreaming, so I open the terrace door for some fresh air and look around, I do a RC, confirm the dream and decide to lift off. On one hand I feel relieved itís just a dream, but on the other hand I feel guilty for leaving them there, as maybe this is a shared dream and they are left alone in the nightmare.

      Castles and meditation
      Viewed from above, the apartment complex now looks like a doll house castle, very cute. From up in the sky I see another castle, much bigger, on top of a hill. It is as if it has no walls, so I see people inside it, as if they are on shelves. There are also many people floating around this castle, just hanging and I feel all these strange characters are indeed other dreamers. I float in the air, cross my legs to meditate, but I almost wake up. When back in the dream I am now inside some place and I sit facing a wall, not to distract myself. I try to visualize Buddhas and really feel their presence, but after some time I start seeing all sorts of lights and shapes on the wall, like light projections. I look back and see some girls with a overhead projector, preparing it to play some movie. I leave this place and find some very very quiet corner on an underground level of this building. Between the elevators and the exit to a parking, thereís a really zen corner with a waterfall on a glass wall, water falling on a pebble base and a garden behind the wall. I sit there, soothed by the sounds of the water and I manage to do a successful short meditation for a while. I feel the presence of Guru Rinpoche, but then I almost wake up. I hang on and dream becomes stronger, but not enough, so I must move to keep it going. I decide to finish the RPG task I left undone last time.

      Eating the fruit and becoming a dragon
      (RPG task)
      I enter one of the elevators and imagine it taking me to the same supplier market in Denn, where I was last time. The elevator drops me at a very busy cargo entrance area. I get out of the way of men carrying heavy loads to outside where merchants stands are selling produce to the villagers.
      I immediately see the strange fruit Iím supposed to eat on a fruit stand. I choose a small one and eat it. I keep walking around waiting to see if anything happens (itís supposed to give me some new magical power) but nothing happens. I then find a stand where people gather around, very agitated and I go check whatís up. Itís more of those fruits, but here they look bigger and better and are being served already cut and clean for free to the villagers. Two girls approach me and ask me what is it about. By the way they are so ďdefinedĒ and ďlucidĒ I realize they are dreamers. I tell them thereís a task on DV to come here and eat this fruit, which is supposed to give us new powers. They enjoy that, they say they also wanna give it a try and then we all grab some fruits to eat.
      Once we are served, we gather on the left side of this stand where they meet a third girl friend and they ask me more about DV. I first ask for their names and tell them mine. One girl says she is called what I perceived asďLollenaĒand the other what I perceive as ďSinoĒ(as in Portuguese for ďbellĒ; the equivalent sound in English would beďxenuĒ). The third girl to my left looks blocked, as if she couldnít remember her name, so I continue to explain what is DV and give them the url. Then the third girl finally says something. She tells me that she (or they?) is user of some other dream website and she tells me the name of it. First it sounded like Dreampaws, which I know exists, but I asked her to repeat and it wasnít that, although it was something similar, like maybe Dreampush (which I found later on waking up, that also exists). Iím not sure though, because it became fuzzy on waking up.
      Then we walk around the town and they ask me about the super-power. I say I donít know what it is and I also havenít felt anything different yet. We try telekinesis, morphing, etc, and it all goes very well, but I say I already had all these powers before, so it canít be it.
      Then we hear people scream and we see a big pinkish tornado coming right to the centre of the town. We combine efforts and we try to break the tornado apart. I see to my right another guy who is also trying to do it, so we are at least 5 people doing it. Soon the tornado fades away and is but a large pink cloud in the sky. People are cheering us and I lose the girls in the middle of the crowd. When I meet them again later (only the two girls with names) at the entrance of a tavern down a street, they had just been approached by some bullies and one of them sobs while the other comforts her. She admits to her friend that she owes money to those guys and donít know what to do. I pass by them and remind them weíre just in a dream, but they seem to have lost lucidity for good, so I keep going. Itís when I start feeling the effect of the fruit!
      I feel my body changing, my neck elongating, I walk in four limbs and then I spread my ďarmsĒ and I feel like I have wings. I flap them and slowly elevate in the air. I am still fundamentally human shaped, but I think I am becoming a dragon! It is hard to deal with this new body and I wobble a little bit in the air. At some point I lose balance all together and fall down on the floor. I think I come back to my human form.
      On the floor, I am facing the end of the street, which is the end of the town and I see a huge looming creature crawling in my direction. Itís another dragon.
      I immediately remember the talk I had with my dad during the day. He had asked me if I fear dragons when I meet them in my dreams and I had said no, in general they are friendly. But this one has a really dark energy and I immediately felt really scared. I run back to the town, looking for a place to take cover and hide. He steps up, trying to catch me and I only have time to duck under a wagon to my left and I see the dragon passing right by my side. He circulates the wagon and hits it repeatedly. I know itís a matter of time until he turns it over. For some reason I am really scared and convinced I canít beat this dragon. So when he is about to grab me with his claws, I decide to wake up.

      5:00

      Puppies
      Some guy is buying his kid a puppy. The kid opens up with me and says he didnít receive love from his father so he is doing this as a compensation. I get involved and I tell the guy about Puppy Mills and that he shouldnít support it by buying a puppy. Instead should go adopt a puppy from a shelter. I also say I hope this puppy wonít end up on a shelter later on if he gets tired of him. I take them to a shelter and the kid goes wild when he spots a little lion on some cage in the corner. He goes get it and hugs and kisses the lion. The animals are looked after by black androids.

      6:00

      Updated 02-23-2011 at 10:23 AM by 34880 (to correct spelling mistakes)

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , nightmare , memorable
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