NyxCC

Date: 17 May

Pre bed: 120 mg gingko

Total sleep time: 8 hrs

WBTB: took 2xpeppermint oil tablets, half cup matcha tea, duration 10 mins (OK, not too asleep, not too awake)

Dream quality and recall: Very vivid dreams, emotions, I got woken up a number of times and forgot any other dreams/fragments.

Fragment1: Me and my dad at some unknown place, I notice two pairs of lions, that is four lions in front of me. They look a bit like from a simulation. They are lazily lying on top of each other, I like them.

Fragment2: I am with my parents possibly in front of the hotel. Somebody tells me Checker lives there, one the first floor. I fly up the window to see him. There are three beds and three guys in the room, they notice me so I have the chance to quickly peek at only one of them. Not sure if it was Checker.

Dream3: Me and parents in a hotel again, my dad is about to order some food, guacamole on the menu. A bit later we are preparing to leave the place, I go somewhere to take a shower, get my things. I end up on a dark unlit staircase, going down, feeling a bit creepy, then up again. I keep on following this staircase until I reach the last floor. There sititing in the darkness on a sofa is a woman, watching TV. She is a bit blurred. I also notice that the wall next to the stairway has a window with nice view of the stars. This is on woman’s property so I want to ask her if I can go and star gaze. But when I turn to key, I have problems with my vision – I only see with one eye, grey darkness in the other. I try to change this but it doesn’t work, so I go down the stairs, fall and land in our old place.

Dream4: I am in a toy store, which is actually in an apartment with family relatives. We are looking to buy toys for their kids. I see something like a lego computer toy, red colors. It feels more like a kindergarten, there is a room full of kids. I am in a different room which is rapidly changing, and see my friends, they have a small boy irl. My friends are more like part of the background. I concentrate on their boy, which is also here. I like him very much and talk to him. He does not look like a child at all, more like a mini version of an adult, his eyes are unusual. He is extremely smart and answers back. I mention the word “quarter” and wonder if he knows what it means. I ask him does he know what is half of a half, and also ask him to tell me what we have just been talking about. He knows it all.

We are now in some kind of a cabin, and I can see large construction machine moving menacingly outside. I remark to the kid that this is very similar to a dream, so he should not worry. I then begin to explain about dreams in general, and that he shouldn’t be afraid of nightmares, but once again, he seems to understand the issue better than me and already has lots of experience. While we are talking there is a strange animal in the cabin, it resembles a panda, and in my dream mind is a panda. We caress it. This whole last section of the dream is soaked with very positive feeling.

Dream5: I am in some kind of game, they have levelled the terrain so there are no objects, just green grass. I command an army of some kind, I zoom out and try to find the leader, which is in red. This takes a while, but I finally spot him. There are a number of sections of the terrain, one territory, which we will later cross, but I first want to establish a city. It turns out I cannot establish the city there, but must go north and conquer one. As I am trying to save, the menu is similar to that of Pharaoh game, and I find out that I have been playing with only one city download. Numerous city downloads are available. At the same time I see a message that the team doing these updates will be retiring, so no more game updates after two weeks? At the top of the menu game location is one which belongs to DV.

Date: 16 May

Pre bed: 3mg mel (needed to fall asleep fast)

Sleep quality and recall: feeling sleepy, fleeting recall

Total sleep time: 8 hrs

Dream1: I picked up the phone and heard an unfamiliar and strange sounding voice. I was wondering who it was, when I had the thought that it was one of the family members of a friend of mine. Then he picked up the phone. We were supposed to meet somewhere. I went there but it was really hot, the sun shining bright (never felt such so warm during a dream), so I left.

Fragment2: Family friends are working on something like a lettuce, discussing my cooking skills. I am trimming dill with scissors, it looks weird , so I stop doing it.

Dream3: A young woman that looks like a not very famous actress comes to our place and behaves improperly. I become enraged, grab her by the hair and drag her outside. She somehow makes her way back and pretends to be hurt, lying on the bed. I carry her out and make sure to close the door well, I don’t care what the neighbours will think.

Date: 15 May

Pre bed: 400 mg valerian, 100b B6

Total sleep time: 7hrs

Impressions and Recall: There was my usual for B6 sense of aggression seeping through parts of the dream. After waking up from the lucid (after 5 hrs of sleep), I decided to take key notes and review as not to wake myself up. I got pretty excited and the internal dialogue turned on full power, resulting in about an hour of insomnia. After that I fell into deeper more unconscious type of sleep with a decreased recall capability. I had another lucid from which I remember only a part, I continued sleeping after it was over and had an non-ld.

Fragment1: Some kind of posts on DV that had to do with PennyRoyal.

Fragment2: At home, my parents have gone somewhere and I am in my room cooking some strange pancake/calzone thing that looks and tastes delicious. I have to leave some for my grandma.

Dream3 DILD TOTY attempt: I am in a room which feels familiar, three women are sitting around the table, and I am cleaning up as if after a meal. One of the women has some tempting white green chocolate cookies, I am secretly planning on having a few after the women are gone. Another female DC comes in and starts behaving really aggressively. She demands all the attention, looks me in the eye with hatred and begins complaining to one of the women in the room. I have the feeling that they will start a fight with each other, so get out of there fast. Her hostility feels kind of fake, and at this point the memory of the B6 effect for me reaches my subcon on a subtle level.

I find myself on the stairs of a building and lots of aggressive gangster type boys are all around me. One of them is particularly evil, feels dangerous. I become lucid on a distracted level, realizing this is a dream, but unable to do anything about the guy. I am trying to move away but it is really crowded on the stairs, I think somebody pushed me, and I end up in a niche on the wall. The wall is not really wall but something liquid that sucks me in. As I move forward in this thing, I achieve a better clarity of mind and am fully lucid and in control. There is a single task that I feel the urge to do now, go to Angel Falls. I remember CL’s advice to try to feel the floor, so I move my fingers, touching the empty space and feeling small grains of sand and pebbles. The dream idea was to be on top of Angel Falls, but in the water, so in addition to my feeling the floor, I begin to make swimming movements with my hands. The wall is already liquid and it is like a white pinkish sinking sand made of rubber-like substance. The whole world has disappeared and it is just me and the wall and I feel a closer to the void, afraid that the dream would destabilize and disconnect. I am swimming forward and nothing happens for a while, but I decide to keep on swimming. At some point the whole environment changes and I find myself looking at a flower, submerged in water.

I look at the dark purple flower and marvel its beauty, noticing every petal in detail. I look around, and see that I am in the middle of a pond/lake that stretches as far as my eyes can see. At the same time, mixed with this image I find myself in my old room, where all this is taking place. I focus on the surface of the pond which looks like a silver mirror reflecting the clouds. I then notice that this pond is covered or rather slowly begins to cover itself with lotus flowers. Bright yellow and magenta lotus flowers are everywhere I move my eyes to look. I feel happiness upon witnessing this beautiful sight. The dream is extremely vivid and stable. Needless to say, I am somewhat distracted by this, but keep gliding on the surface of the pond in the direction of Angel Falls. This doesn’t work too well, I am still within the confines of my room, looking through some glass that distorts the view from outside, which is the view from my room with strange rainbow-like effects. A bit like looking out during a bus ride. It looks like my room wins the battle between the two layers of images, gaining more detail.

Soon the water level in the room goes down and with it my lucidity. I struggle to restore the water level with intent, but non-lucid already. I manage to briefly do so, but then I see the floor and the water is retreating. There is also mud everywhere, the furniture is falling apart. I become concerned about the state of my old room and wonder how to clean everything. [end of memory]

After the dream ended, I had a brief awakening, noting to myself about the lucid, but then fell asleep again. I heard some kind of bell-like sound, I guess a type of HI, that actually woke me up. After reviewing the dream I had 1 hour of insomnia. Then - deeper sleep and less memorable sleep.

Fragment4: Having to share the bed with relatives, I preferred sleeping on the ground.

Fragment5: Some more beds, family friends.

Dream6 DILD: I am in my hometown, in a familiar park and am lucid. I see a few dogs around, mostly small ones and larger one (no idea what breed) captures my attention. I keep looking at it and feel my emotions reflected in the dog. I observe it a for a while, the dream is stable, I am happy. By simply looking around, I unconsciously summon more dogs of different smaller breeds. I find this cool. [end of memory]

Fragment7: I see and talk to a politician I don’t like.

A bit out of time this week, an actually not so brief update:

13 May

- Me and a group of 5 kids decide to create a business. We go to register it, and the start up costs are only 100. We talk to some lawyer who says its is excellent because we are all from different countries.

- I become upset and leave the house of a friend wearing slippers. It is very hard to walk with these but I don't find this unusual.

- In our old neighborhood, there are lots of new stores. I go in a supermarket where they are making fresh carrot juice, it is green in color, I wonder a bit about that, but conclude that green carrot juice is ok.

14 May

- In our old place, my mom keeps talking, while I want to go to sleep. I tell her that her talking activates my brain and I cannot fall asleep. It is early morning, still dark outside and snowing.

- I see Dr dre on the street, he is smoking and I want to join him. Before I do, he has finished with the stuff. A skater boy pushes him hard and I think how rude kids are nowadays. I follow Dre to a building, but the cops are all over the place. I have a micro second of lucidity, remembering I read a part of Xanos's dream from yesterday and know it this the cause for this one. I lose my lucidity a second later and try to leave the building.

- I am in jail which looks like a normal house, my belongings are also there. A woman calls me and I think they are finally letting me go. She informs me that she allows me to go out, so that I can find a woman called Connie Flowers or something similar. A friend from school is also accompanying me. We look for the place where Connie lives, but cannot find her. I have another second brief moment of clarity and high awareness, when I am climbing a fence, while looking for her. I continue following the dream but get the brilliant idea to ask some old ladies to show me the way to Connie's house. They all point in one direction and that excites me a lot. I am absorbed back by the dream and we go to the place the women were pointing at.

- A false awakening where I jot down key words from the previous dream. I write Connie Flowers on a piece of paper. Had it not been this FA, I probably would have forgotten the name. It was so realistic that I actually looked down and expected to see it written in my notebook, but nothing was there irl.

- On a street, thinking about last night's dreams. I look at the sky, and decide to star gaze. I have my blanket with me. I get interrupted by a machine washing the streets. My slippers get washed away...

Note: micro-lucids, not counting
Pretty busy this week, I wish my sleep could condense, so that I still get some nice REM moments.

Total sleep time: 8 hrs

Pre bed: Q10, probiotics, and cup of green tea (no problem falling asleep after yesterday's insomnia)

Other stuff: The guys had a planned event for today morning, so my chances to get some decent sleep and lucid were minimal, and yet...

Recall: As soon as I woke up, so did my bf and realized he's really late, started running around and talking to me as I tried to remember and write down the dreams. Took me a while to finish that.

Dream1: My parents have abandoned our home, and the place is falling apart. I go to the restroom and try flushing, but there is no water. It is because there was a leakage, so they have stopped the water. I wonder why don't they just fix everything instead of leaving it like that. My mom appears and says it is time for us to go.

On our way out we see an older friend of ours and ask her how she is doing. She replies very briefly, so I ask her about her son, I actually say the wrong name, but in the dream that's his name. She then begins a very long story that I don't feel like listening to, and I regret ever asking her. I tell her to send my greetings to him although I could contact him myself.

Soon her son/my friend comes by and we are drinking apple juice. As I pour myself some juice, I notice that there are insects like a dead yellow ladybug and some insect eggs the jug, and decide I won't be having any more juice. My friend is a bit offended that I don't want to drink the juice and we now have to throw it away. I leave the building, he remains to deal with the juice, but will join me later.

I am on the street, I hear music and I see native Americans perform at the end of the street. The come to the front, wearing traditional costumes. I also see some bright spots with different colors about half the size of a person above each of them and assume I am seeing their aura. I enjoy the show, they sing and perform some stunts. When it is over, I notice that I am the only person clapping hands so I feel a bit embarrassed. Why is nobody applauding? I conclude that if you do applaud, you are supposed to leave some money, and as I check my pockets I find that I don't have any.

Dream2: My bf is negotiating with my dad about a place we want to visit. Actually I have not told my dad about this so it gets a bit awkward. We postpone the discussion for another time and my dad is on his way home. He is taking a bus, and I am looking at the back of the bus, expecting to wave goodbye. He finally looks back and I see that he is talking to a friend of his, and there is also some unknown woman that he is friends with.

I suddenly find myself sitting on the backseat of the bus, and two of my friends are also sitting with me there. We propose an explanation that this bus is very spacey, so when we thought we were outside, we actually never left the bus. Ok, but we need to get out, especially that we know that this is a travel bus, and won't be making any stops until it reaches its destination. We go to at least try to inform the driver we need to get off.

As we move forward, we are in some kind of a building, but in our minds, we are still in the bus. Our goal is to reach the reception, so once we reach it, we will be able to leave the bus. The building is very strange, I am looking at some building plan, trying to navigate and find the way out. There are lots of doors and lockers, it looks really puzzling. I remark that everything looks so strange, it almost feels like in a dream. We continue looking around, I see some women working there as janitors and ask them where the reception is, but they can't help us.

One of my friends comes up with the idea that we need to inject ourselves with a time travel serum so we can escape this place. We prepare to do so, we have some syringes, the green time travel serum and start injecting ourselves with it. I get the largest dose, the serum is visible on hands, and our veins get extra green.

I am on some unknown street, and we have succeeded in changing the course of events and going back in time. I look at my fingers and notice that the knuckles have swollen, my fingers are bent in a very painfully looking way. This is strange, but I remember that some portion of the serum was in contact with my skin, which is what have caused this temporary side effect.

I take a brief moment and contemplate about time and what has changed. I look at a clothing store and I see that a guy that used to do something else before we changed time, is now famous and has his own label. I wonder about my memories because things have changed, would I know what has happened. I answer to myself, that I wouldn't but everybody else would have the new memory in place and I will learn what happened just as if I am listening to the news, that way I will get updated.

Dream3 DILD TOTM: I think this directly followed after our time travel. I enter in a room and notice a very old TV of a known brand and something that looks like a retro computer. The brand of the computer is also there, but it doesn't look familiar. I am in uplifted mood and say to some DC friend of mine. "Now we are going to have a look, have some fun reading the brand name and see if it changes". I stare at the logo, try reading it and expect to be normally able to read it.

Instead, I have difficulty focusing on the letters and it finally hits me! I really did not expect to become lucid today, but anyways I am happy about that. Oh right, once again time to concentrate on the tasks. My mind is a bit hazy, so I think I need to set the room for this, looking around for the items I need. I turn way too much and it feels more like spinning than looking around. I expect some mythological creature to just pop up while I do this, and mistakenly to see an egg as well. Nothing of the kind.

I notice at least five DCs sitting down, their backs facing me, as if they are all working on their PCs. I begin shouting, asking them to help me set the room and everything I need. Nobody is paying any attention to me. I become upset at this and finally decide to tell them they are not real. No reaction, their backs are really stiff. I repeat this again as if I am insulting them with those words. Finally, a girl with dark hair and vampire teeth answers back. I can barely hear what she is saying, she repeats it again " Oh, I am bla bla with fear". Bla bla is actually some m-word that does not exist at all. You are what? I ask her again. I repeat the strange m-word a few more times, trying to memorize it. It works but I begin to forget the dream. The vampire girl starts to laugh, and makes me laugh too. Overcame by happiness, I am able to control the DCs in the room and everybody bursts out laughing.

The dream fades and I am back in darkness, in my bed. I feel tired and heavy so no point to DEILD. I want to get up to journal, but fall asleep instead.

Dream4: I am in a classroom, and recognize at least one guy from school there. He is trying to tell me something, pointing at him, then at me. Me and him? No way, I tell him, then I realize that he is just pulling my leg. He continues with this strange stupid behavior and now tries to match a friend of his with another classmate of mine. These guys are crazy... (end)

I wake up, my bf wakes up, the whole world wakes up, and everybody is rushing around as I try to hold my dream memory and write it down. Finally TOTM!

Total sleep time: 5 hrs

Pre bed: 3 mg mel

WBTB1 natural: 2x peppermint oil tablets

WBTB2 alarm: 1/2 cup of green tea + analytical thoughts + noise = insomnia

Vividness: Extreme

Dream1: Me and my parents are in a hotel, I have just had some supplements and am preparing for sleep. I look at a graph with bar that shows progress towards lucidity that depends on the amount of menthol I took. The status bar is not completely full, about 70 percent to lucid, so I am contemplating whether I should take another tablet or just risk falling asleep and see what happens. I ask my mom if she plans to take a shower now, so that I can shower before her and go to bed. She is watching/listening to something and has three sets of headphones, two of which I identify as mine, and get a bit upset to see she has left a very realistically looking earwax on one of them.
mood: task oriented - become lucid

Fragment2: The toilet seat in grandma's place, and a big mess of poo. Will give no further descriptions, although I remember it in quite a detail. ( Sorry, this was very vivid so had to mention it,lol!)
mood: wondering

Fragment3: I am in a bus, and I am observing and being told the story of a man and a woman. They were supposed to meet here at that bus, be together, but one of them changes something, and the other one gets off the bus before this happens. I am thinking perhaps another time.
mood: interested, positive

Comments: Oh, well, went a bit over the edge here, but at least I stuck to my plan to do a WBTB. Lol!

Pre bed: Brain multi vit

Result: vividness plus sleepiness, emotional dreams

WBTB: fail, no tea, no menthol

Recall method: none

Fragment1: two guys that are dreamers meet. It seems that all three of us have great self-control and understanding.
mood: positive

Dream2: I am in my old neighborhood, now go into some strange house where I am good friends with the DC owner. There is like a gathering of people, my mom's friends, some classmates that I don't like etc. For some reason, I begin teasing them and they react very aggressively. Everybody is looking at me, shouting at the same time, there is heavy tension and hatred? The DC guy is the only friendly person in the room, and I worry that he will be forced to join the group of aggressive DCs.
mood: aggression in the air

Later on I go to his room, there are two beds in the room, he is sharing the room with his sister but I notice only one desk. There is another room, where he was born, so they are keeping it for the next generation. My father is also there.
mood: inquisitive

In another part of the house, later on. The DC is now somebody I know, and I make him happy. I am concerned about doing the whole thing, but it is too late.
mood: sexual

Fragment3: One of our guests who initially insisted the bedsheets are dirty and disgusting now tells me that we only need to sprinkle them with water and put them back. I disagree and tell her that she contradicts herself. This leads to a scandal and there is more tension in the air.

Comments: OK, I have completely ruined it today. I told myself yesterday, I make a plan in the evening, then have the discipline to follow my plan, no matter what my mood is during WBTB. Why oh why did I turn off the alarm clock and went to bed, when the plan was to have some tea before that? A little bit of wakefulness was exactly what I needed! I really have to get more serious about the WBTB, only once in a week is a true fiasco!

And another reminder: every time there is sexual attraction to another guy, at least do RC, chances are this is a dream!

Oh, anyways....feed your brain multivitamins make for a neurotic personality it seems.

Date: 7 May

During day: Re-energized by consuming lots of fruits

Pre bed: 3mg melatonin

WBTB duration: 16 mins, woke myself too much, hard time falling back asleep

WBTB: 2x peppermint oil tablets (200mg each)

Recall method: Woke pen-noted an almost illegible description during WBTB for Dream2, briefly reviewed in mind when back to bed

Fragment1: A large spider and then other insects, one was like a bee, I am trying to kill them, smashed them successfully

Dream2 DILD: My father has given me the task of preparing some kind of report for him. I am browsing in a chemistry textbook with different substances and after each substance there is a lengthy regression. My father wants a list of the substances only, which I don't think is right. He is annoyed that I am so slow and still not ready. I move on and jump over some furniture and see my grandma. I begin to explain that the regressions are the most important part in this report.

I continue on my way, and now am in something similar to a trailer with a friend of mine. Obviously she is keeping some items of mine there, one carton box with my stuff, that I want to take on my way. We talk about something. I notice that there is a wounded cheetah on the table. Actually there is no sign of wound but I know it is tired. I play with its tail, and caress it. It purrs and gently rubs its soft head and body on my hand. It is very enjoyable for both of us. I discuss the cheetah with someone, pointing out that it is the fastest creature on earth.



I then move on, I find myself in another place and someone tells me that my friends, and lists a number of people I supposedly know, are dead in another part of the city. Obviously machines have taken over the city and are destroying it. I look outside the window and see construction machines falling into an abyss. I have a bit of a paranoia from the machines because I know that they will soon come to destroy this part of town. I become desperate and say something like " I am so tired of such situations when I think that I am dreaming, but I am not, later it is a dream, then it is not!". I decide it is time to leave the place, and walk out a door. I notice a coca cola label sticker, but there is a poem on it. Perhaps I should leave something behind, I wonder, but there really is no point.

I am going to fly scout the area, to see if the machines are still in that part of town. I stretch my hands horizontally, like a cross, and then lift off in this position. I have good control of my movement this time, but still flying too high is a bit of challenge, it has to do with the vision of the ground below me.

It is hard to look down and perceive the flight distance and control the flight at the same time, but I fly in the direction that I desire. I am also lucid at this point. At above skyscraper height, I fly now forward, over an area with some water, HK in my mind, and look for a place to land. I have completely forgotten about the machines. Then the word "tasks" emerges in my mind and I remember I have work to do. For a second the thought crosses my mind that I may not have the time to do any tasks, but then answer myself that DV people won't mind that because I still had a good time flying.

As I land, I feel some kind of a string release me, I am then on the ground. I look at the DC in front of me. He is rather unpleasant but I accept this, his faces changes and he is now more beautiful and smiling. There is a DC woman to my left, but I pay little attention to her. I think at that point I may have had the gut feeling that this dream is coming to an end, and decide to stabilize before starting on any tasks. I remember to shout something and it feels a bit more stable. Then I throw myself on the ground, feel it as much as possible with my hands, little stones, etc. and as if that isn't enough, I decide to lick the ground. I also lick some kind of trash a blue thread, it tastes like rubber. I find this last part disgusting and decide to spit out. Saliva comes out of my mouth and at that moment I feel my physical lips moving. Before I have any time to react I find myself in my bed, still with my eyes closed, but very aware of my physical body. I feel there is no point to DEILD so I head for the journal.

Note: This wake was a few minutes before the WBTB alarm. I decide to use this wake as WBTB, take notes, visit restroom, wonder whether I should try the menthol tablets, have two tablets. The whole thing takes about 16 mins but I am too awake as I go back to bed. I wonder what to do from here...I decide I might cycle a bit to help me sleep but as I start with sight my mind shuts down and I begin drifting off, while still having awareness of my body. I cannot do even one cycle. It may sound like a good state to do WILD, but it isn't that good. I spent one hour in a semi-conscious borderline state where I occasionally saw and withdrew from dreamlets, yet wasn't dreaming, but rather laying there half-aware of my body and fully aware that I can't fall asleep. The tablets or the earlier wake gave me mild heartburn as well. I finally managed to fall asleep but then it was time to get up...

Dream3 mini-lucid: Together with some guys, this time we are on a flying machine, initially like a retro airplane, I am trying to control its movements, but it is hard. We are going to a conference related to technology, and approaching a block where this is taking place. I see a parking place for flying machines and land this now spacesuit? there. I hope nobody steals it while we are away. I look for number ten part of the building, we must be really close. There is also a McD in the building, which explains why there are so many people around. To my left is Justin Bieber, I am moderately happy. I am lucid for a very short while thinking about the peppermint oil tablets I took and whether they affect my experience. The alarm wakes me up.

Note: Happy about the first lucid, despite the fact that couldn't do any tasks. I feel this was at the end of the early more memorable REM cycles. The second lucid was very short so I am not including it in my count.

Date: 8 May

Total sleep time: 8 hrs

Recall method: key words only

Pre bed: Q10, probiotics, valerian

WBTB: set for later than yesterday but I was feeling very sleepy so decided to skip

Fragment1: I am doing biceps curls, it feels great. I look at myself from a distance and see well-shaped arms. I keep on doing the curls, I wake up.

Fragment2: Grandma tells me my aunt is now unemployed

Fragment3: A former classmate

Fragment4: I am making matcha tea

Dream5: My tooth has fallen out and I am talking to the dentist's assistant. I am holding pieces of my tooth in the hand and they form a whole tooth. I have the desire to put it back in my mouth. I want to book an appointment but she tells me it is not necessary. I just should not take B-complex for my tooth, and instead use some kind of liquid to gargle. (That could have made a good Tooth of month bonus task, but if it was up to me I wouldn't do it again!)

Date: 5 May

Total sleep time: 3 hrs

Dreams: None remembered, although I am sure I was dreaming something when I had to wake up to prepare for travel

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Date: 6 May

Total sleep time: 9 hrs

Impressions: While I was looking forward to the REM rebound, I actually got a lot of heavy sleep today and retrieving memories was rather hard. This is not the first time I have noticed this effect since I began keeping a more extensive DJ. That's why I decided to put some emphasis on it this time, heavy sleep deprivation actually led to more deep sleep and less memories. Anyways, it's good I got some decent sleep. Now, prepare for lucid!

Fragment1: A friend of ours who is pregnant irl, she may be expecting twins

Fragment2: A conversation about dreaming and lucidity, I vaguely remembered this after briefly waking up, thought things are getting better because I am thinking about lucidity

Fragment3: A good friend from school. I take my time to check out the way he looks, slighly different. There is some feeling at the back of my mind when I observe him, (he is a DS), but I am totally absorbed by the story. He tells me about a class get together they planned but one of the girls made a big scandal? I reply that I remember the event and also say that I have had a dream about the whole thing. I mention dreaming a few more times during the conversation. In the dream I also have the feeling my friend may have dreamt about something similar.

Date: 4 May

Total sleep time: 8 hrs, possible REM rebound

Recall method: memorized, later wrote down

Location: hotel

Dream1: Two girls that I don't like at all are back. One of them actually has lost a lot of weigh and looks quite fit, and doesn't look like herself at all. I become concerned that the other one will try to come home and convince my bf's brother that she likes him, so that he falls in love with her. I look for a place outside to give my bf a call and warn him about the situation. I do that, then get distracted by some rusty doors of a yard.

Fragment2: Another dream where one of those girls participated

Dream3: I am back to some place, most likely living with my parents. They have invited relatives over and I don't like that, so I decide to go out. Before I do that I engage in extensive TK, lifting all kinds of objects, including rolls of toilet paper. I notice that it is easier to lift some smaller lighter ones. I then look for the keys and find my way out.

As I go out, there are two aggressive dogs that notice me, one small that is trying to bite me and a bigger one. I go back into the house. The DC of a friend of mine is now here as well. I tell her about the situation, she is very confident that there is nothing to worry about and says she will accompany me. We go out, at the same time another woman from the same building comes out and calls the dog by some name. It now behaves very friendly, I want to know its name, but can't get to ask the woman. We reach some kind of subway and I see that most trains are cancelled or there is one every hour. I have also forgotten something, maybe the keys. My friends's DC is very helpful again, suggests that she will go back to get them, I just have to wait for her. I tell her that there is no sense of going out so late, because it will be hard to get on the train if there are many people and it comes only once every hour. She is calm and replies that we will walk back home, no worries about that. She goes to get the keys or whatever and is soon back.

We go out, looking for a place to eat or drink. This guy attaches to us, he works in one of the nearby restaurants and knows the area rather well. He is flirting with my friend, but I know she has a bf, anyways, that's her business.

I am sitting on a table with some guys that I think I know. I see huge cups of raspberries passing on some kind of conveyer in the air. There are also cakes. I see another guy that I know, and he is celebrating his birthday or something, with one of the big cakes, but nobody is paying much attention to him, because they don't like him.

Comments: My friend's DC was very helpful this time. I should really learn to get my DCs to help me more often.

Still catching up

Date: 2 May

Total sleep time: 6 hrs

Recall method: tried to memorize dream, recorded when opportunity

Fragment1: It looks like I have bought a pack of snickers, which is actually mars, but when I have a look it is snickers again

Dream2: I am in a building, most likely trying to find my way out, but parts pf the building are locked. Some specific women have relationship with bad guys who are gang members. They are dangerous and soon there will be a fight between us and them. Later, a guy with long hair comes and helps us, so we manage to win. The gang members turn to more pleasant manga type of characters and we discuss the nature of time.

Fragment3: I am in a store where they sell stuffed toys. Initially, they are trying to get rid of the toys by giving them away, a bit later they are selling them with discount. (I really should notice this more often, first it is A, then it is actually B). I relate these toys to DV, and wonder if I should get some and send them to DV members, but I don't have the address.

Fragment4: I am near a familiar park in my hometown. I see some unemployed women, they carry a sign that they are looking for a job. I try to cross the street, when I see a bear cub and a cat. In this case, I try to walk around because I am rather cautious, but soon come close to the animals. I focus on the cat which starts to purr and does cat movements. I unintentionally startle it a bit.

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Date: 3 May

Total sleep time: 7 hrs

Recall method: tried to memorize as much as possible, noted when opportunity

Dream1: I think I am supposed to meet a guy and am thinking about going somewhere as the scenario develops. I am in some bed and there is a transparent line that is like a field of energy. This field is very dangerous, it comes like an earthquake through space and then can kill you. I am trying to keep my distance from this line and expect it to appear once again, but surprisingly to me it doesn't? (Good time to RC even in this crazy scenario!)

Fragment2: I am going to an event and am on the bus station (add to DS) with my classmates. I am actually coming and then going back to HK.

Fragment3: I am sitting, looking at a table with lots of food. I also see some piglets. I begin to ponder whether they can actually associate the food with them becoming food themselves. I don't want them to get affected by this.

Date: 1 May 2013

Pre bed: 400mg valerian

Total sleep time: 6.30 hrs, pre travel

Recall: Had vivid dreams today, but my recall is very weak. A strange combination perhaps due to the valerian. Had to rush out of bed so that may have contributed too.

Overall impressions: It feels like I had a great night, whatever I was dreaming left me with positive feelings.

Dream1: I went somewhere before that and now am on my way back. Following me are the brothers of someone who looks like my boyfriend. He is Armenian and obviously so are his brothers. Overall positive feelings towards these guys. I think about them and how their family is looking for someone like me, to get married to their son. I also think about how I have figured out they are Armenian and find myself in an Armenian church.

I am back from wherever I came and me and another DC not sure if he was Armenian, are on the street. I am looking at the sunset and commenting it. The sun looks a bit strange but since a few days ago I was looking at a very strange sun phenomenon, caused by the setting sun and some rain clouds, I thought I am seeing something similar.

Fragment 2 mini-DILD: I am on the street and suddenly a strange creature, like a game-like monster with a skirt, similar to a Cyclops maybe, appears out of nowhere. I immediately become lucid and tell myself not to be afraid and that this is a dream. He vanishes as fast as he appeared, I find this a bit strange. Memory gap. (I did not know about TOTM May at the time, this is game-related residual I guess).

I suppose that after he was gone, I lost my focus and lucidity and engaged back in the dream. I have no other recall.

Prebed: 1 1/2 glass of soy milk

Total sleep time: 8 hrs

Recall method: none, woke up briefly after each dream but was so sleepy, I didn't bother to write anything. Did not attempt WBTB either. Everything is so fragmented now, good thing I still remember although with much less detail the short DILD I had.

Dream1: We are back to high school and as usual we have to do an extra year. Everybody should be in class soon, I wonder again how are we going to do that. I am waiting for a friend of mine to show up as usual, I don't think he did.

Fragment2: One of my classmates, her features are a bit strange and now she also has a sister that looks very similar to her. (She actually has a brother)

Fragment3: On the beach, I am watching the waves. I think somebody, it kind of looked like a documentary and I was part of it, said that here the waves are just the right size to swim and maybe surf?

Dream4 mini-DILD: The background is grey and a number of DCs that look like zombies are walking towards me. I become lucid. I remember my recent resolution to freestyle during the next lucids and see what I can make out of the situation. I decide that I will use this one to train my reactions. Ok, so they are walking towards me, I don't care at all. I am just consciousness, no material substance, they can't hurt me. They are still advancing, and one comes so close that it actually touches my hand. I feel and see my hand and this destroys my concept of non-materiality. I brace myself for the impact. The dream slowly fades and I wake up.

Note to self: Maybe I should spend less time thinking and more time acting in LDs?

Fragment5: I go to the kitchen to look for the bottle of water I bought for myself irl and find that one of our guests has opened it and now holds it in her hand. It is too late to say anything, I just wish this hasn't happened.

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April Review

Number of ld nights: 9 (3 with double lds)

Number of lds: 12 (2 WILD, 2 DEILD, 8 DILD)

Quality: Good, with few exceptions, a few fade away issues and changing the scene is still a challenge

Recall: I am getting used to having a roller-coaster type of recall. I am not sure if I should place additional demands on that at the moment.

Things to work on:

- I think I might go for some flexibility on task completion and work more on stability. (But who knows in what kind of mood I will be?)

- I also want to go back to a more decent WBTB schedule after meeting all kinds of relatives and friends is over.

- There are other issues (like changing the scene) to work on but will see how it all goes and deal with them accordingly.

I got more than I expected in April, so I won't be expecting more than I can get in May. Just keep dreaming...

Total sleep time: 9 hrs

Prebed: 1 glass of soy milk

Special HI: somewhere between a few mins-to about half an hour after falling asleep, I wake up as I sometimes do and stare in the dark, seeing a grid of hexagons that is everywhere. I get special HI maybe once a week or every two weeks always when emerging from deep sleep and whatever I am seeing is always imposed on the room. It mostly has to do with the fabric of space.

Dream1: I am looking at the lower part of a door and break it up a bit so that whatever is behind is slightly visible, initially it looks like a corridor with other doors. As I pass through it, I find myself on the roof of our old home, or something similar. I enjoy the view, but it is rather high and I almost fall over the edge. The roof platform is supported by a thin wooden beam which moves as I am there, the roof is not very stable. I try to fix it, the beam is actually the foot of the bed? A friend of mine comes and I ask him for help. While he is too heavy to accompany me on the roof, he can at least hold my legs so that if I lose balance, he will catch me.

Fragment2: My mom is making promises she cannot and in my opinion should not keep. She is also financially supporting her best friend who now expects me to deliver some toothpaste to them. I go looking for this special toothpaste, but I can't find the particular color that they want.