Statistic questions! We get to see how many people are as crazy as I am!
Plodding onwards:

I've never had a dream, lucid or not, in which I wake up in a bed. Or wake up at all. Is even close to normal?"
I have rarely, if ever, became lucid with a reality check. I just understand the situation at what seems to be an unprecedented occasion at the start of my dreaming. Is that normal?
I never dream in a straightforward, pseudo-awake way: No plot-line is standard. Hoodies always have monsters hiding in the seams that I must battle with a quintuple-edged razor in each hand. This is probably the closest to normal.