Dig, kitty, dig deep. |
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I just hope that the check for the rent goes through, because I called the manager, or whoever deals with that stuff days ago, and they said the check went in fine. Problem is, I don't see shit on my bank statements. |
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Last edited by Linkzelda; 08-02-2012 at 05:26 AM.
Dig, kitty, dig deep. |
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I friggin hate geese. They're like hot girls but with annoying voices and arrogant personalities. That and they want to destroy humans. Bastards. |
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The batman and Gotham, no one cared who I was until I put on the mask. |
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Whenever I'm serving elderly customers, they seem to struggle to understand me. I think I've developed the tendency to mumble through my mandatory sentences, because, that's just what you do when you have to say the same things hundreds of times. Anyway, I should kick the habit that's resulting in me being misunderstood; it can have disastrous consequences. |
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Please feel free to check out my DEILD guide: http://bit.ly/2DOqiyT
I have that same problem. I think I just don't enunciate clearly, and older people generally grew up with people talking all proper coz they had speech classes etc. |
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I have a pain in my colon, and I have a lymph node that is fairly large. I am sorta, kinda freaking the fuck out right now. Along with that, and the stress of becoming a "The source" express store, I'm... I'm not having a good time. I want to drink, but I can't because the alcohol seems to be making that lymph node larger. I'm worrying about something I know it isn't, but... bah. Stress is killing me, literally. |
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The other day my photo organizing application wasn't working. It just wouldn't update photos with changes. After a bunch of screaming, ranting and yelling at people over IRC to vent, I discovered it was because I ran out of space on my OS partition. This is how I picture the conversation with my computer. |
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I am really, really stressing out about my daughter's 3 year old check-up. It's not until September but I am giving myself daily panic attacks over it. I know they're going to tell me she's over-weight and that I need to be more careful about what she eats. But I know I don't over feed her or give her bad food. She's allowed to eat 1000 calories a day, and she gets between 700-900 a day. She only eats meat, eggs, minimal cheese, fruits and vegetables. Maybe once a week we'll have rice or pasta, and she only gets a quarter of a cup of it. She's never eaten fast food, and I limit dessert to 2x a week. I write down every single thing she eats, I literally have spread sheets of her daily food intake. I make sure she has a minimum of 2 hours of active play every single day. I know I'm doing all the right things. I am obsessive about it. I used to weigh her every day but I made myself stop because I felt like I was getting out of control. I feel like I'm doing all I can to give her good health, but yet she's still over-weight. I feel like a fucking failure, and the thought of her doctor confirming that makes me feel so horrible. I feel like I'm failing her, like it's going to be all my fault if she gets picked on in school or has a bad body image. I don't want her to be eating disordered like me, I don't want people to look at her and see a fat kid. God...I am seriously freaking out. |
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Sorrow Found Me When I Was Young
Sorrow Waited
Sorrow Won
Ask for their advice instead of them just saying the kid's overweight. Give them this rant. You literally can't do anything else. |
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I agree with Jookia. You're doing everything right, so stop thinking about yourself as a failure. You're clearly very concerned about your daughter and that's more than a lot of kids get. You're taking her to the doctor, so... what better place to get advice? They're not just there to tell you whether or not you're healthy, they're supposed to help you get better. |
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I will also chime in and say you're doing everything you can. I'm also a parent and I totally recognize your feelings. |
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+1 to Aly, melanie and jookia's advices. |
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I just had sort of a strange realization. I don't think I ever really understood before how dissociated I constantly used to be, it's like I was just naturally on PCP at all times. For those of you don't really know much about dissociative drugs, basically how they work is they separate your conscious mind from your body. They generally make it so that physical sensations like pain and pleasure are perceived but not really "registered" (like they don't mean anything and you don't react to them that much), your memory becomes really spotty and unreliable, you have really bizarre or psychotic thought patterns (really strong dissociative activity is often compared to schizophrenia), and you feel totally detached from your life as if you aren't even really human but just an observer, watching your body go through the motions. There are other effects as well, especially at higher levels, but these are some of the main general dissociative effects (like what you would expect from a regular, not-that-intense dose). They also pretty much describe my entire life until recently, when I started overcoming my depression. It used to be that physical sensations meant very little to me, my memory was absolutely atrocious, I thought really crazy things all the time (and developed my really bizarre fetishes and the like), and I felt like I was some kind of machine that just didn't quite understand how the human mind worked and so I just had to kind of watch helplessly as people lived normal lives and wonder how in the hell they did it. Like two or three months ago, when the fog was really starting to lift, I realized that I couldn't even really picture myself that well if I tried. I couldn't remember a lot of the details of my body without looking at it. That's no longer the case. Since then I've also actually experienced for what I feel is the very first time what it feels like to be human. I'm not going to go into detail, but it was an unbelievably incredible feeling, as if everything I've wondered about my whole life suddenly made sense. Normal human instincts which seemed alien to me before were clear as day. This is also starting to become the norm. Along with it my daily thoughts are starting to become much more "normal", and physical sensations are starting to become so much more significant to me. Like... I've known for ages that being incredibly depressed can cause dissociative disorder symptoms (like a less intense version of how really traumatic events can cause memory repression), but I had no idea how much of an effect it could really have, or was having on me. I'm so fucking happy that my mind and body are finally starting to align properly. |
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I am so indecisive that I am wondering if I qualify for some medical condition or some shit. Just the other day, it took me like 5 minutes to park in this parking lot, most of it deciding what spot to go to... I also can't think of things I am totally knowledgeable of when put under pressure. Someone asks me what some of my favorite bands/song are, and I become a "deer in the headlights" and can't answer their question. When I can't answer, they ask for just one, then I couldn't say anything at all. I scare myself. |
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"You Can't, You Won't And You Don't Stop"Lucid Goals: [Ask a DC: "Am I dreaming?"] [Ask a DC: "What are you?"]
Brokedownheart |
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I feel like I can't keep things straight in my head for more than a couple of days. There's so much on my mind. I'm worried and afraid and just want to get everything ready for the baby in my house and in my mind. But it feels like I'm the only one with everything on my shoulders. For instance, I'm very torn about this vbac vs repeat c-section thing, but I can't get ANYTHING out of the father who should be supportive of one or the other option. Anything, really. The whole subject is so controversial in my head. I don't know what to do. I'm having a hard time trusting my instincts. I need to make this decision. The doctor keeps pressing me for it. I want to put my foot down on a VBAC, but I'm so scared that I'll end up getting an emergency c-section again and the first one was traumatizing. I'm still depressed about how it went. The hospital wasn't very supportive. They just wanted me out of the recovery room, but I was shaking so bad for days afterwards. If I were to plan a c-section, then at least I could prepare myself for it and I wouldn't have to go into labor, but it's just so unnatural and I feel like my body is strong enough to do a natural birth. |
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The situation that spawned it is personal. I can try to describe the feeling, though. First, let me try to put you in my old frame of mind.... Growing up, I was pretty much the perfect example of someone who was depressed to the point of being a bit psychotic. I would walk through the halls of high school with images of people around me dying or possessed by demons (or me) constantly running through my head, I'd just observe people living their lives and start thinking about human behavior as some kind of strange robotic behavior to replicate when people were trying to communicate with me, I'd walk around mumbling to myself as my logical and emotional sides actually had complete verbal arguments over all of the random things I would be thinking about (and often bump into walls and stuff because I wasn't paying attention where I was going), and I'd spend all day in every class drawing really surreal things centered around fractal imagery (and this was before drugs). And believe me, that's just a small sample from a long list. |
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Well... maybe someone here has seen my post about how i don't want to go on a holiday with my mom and sister (because of my sister) for 3 days, but i don't want to stay at home with my dad either... |
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I realize that i'm dreaming.
I realize that i'm dreaming.
I realize that i'm dreaming.
<--- My Dream Journal Contains ONLY Lucid Dreams
Sounds cool, just be carefull with online people, but he seems legit. |
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Okay! So I got my girlfriend a jewellery box for her birthday, what do you guys think?! It's like, a really nice one, she's always saying how much jewellery she has, so I thought it'd be a good idea. Do you think it'll go down well? I know this is like a rant/rave thread, but it's become a pretty cool place for me to come for advice and shit ;3 |
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Please feel free to check out my DEILD guide: http://bit.ly/2DOqiyT
Sounds like a good idea to me. I love my jewelry box, just not enough jewelry for it. >.< If she doesn't already have one, I'm sure she'll love it, and even if she does, I'm sure it will be a sweet gift, especially if she has too much already. |
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