Thread: Rant and Rave, Cry and Complain

I don't know how I even fell to sleep at night, especially when I wake up feeling a few things crawling on my body.

I would like to think it's just the body sending signals to see if I'm awake or not, but no....it's freaking ants. I'm surprised they haven't taken a few bites on my skin, especially around my face as yet. To be honest, I wouldn't mind sleeping in a bathroom tub, but someone is going to think I'm some kind of bi-polar freak who has a side that kills people at night if I do that.

I can't even do a WBTB with these ants, they are really annoying in making you feel like you're going into a dream, when it's just having them crawl on your skin that's fooling you.

Ugh. I guess I should just avoid escapism with dreams and deal with killing time for tonight's attempt. I actually can't wait to be pressured again when the semester starts.

Why is it that when I'm bored, pain and worry seem to be something I look forward too. I can't even look forward to happy thoughts without thinking the negatives first...wow.....

Link. If they're piss ants (tiny and dark colored), they wont bite you. If they're fire ants, you really should get someone to kill them if you can't find something that works! I hope you find some peace soon!!

My rant is that I still have a sore throat AND I'm about to start my period. Really? It can't be that time already
I got some antibiotics from hubby last night, so I'll soon see if they'll work their magic.
I was also without internet all morning. I just played Civ so it's no big deal- just a minor annoyance.

My son forced his way into my room when I was sleeping (I had it blocked with a chair that means "I mean business: Keep out!" lol). He wanted to see if I had internet but it was enough to rob me of 2 extra hours of sleep
In 15 minutes, I leave to see my pdoc...

Originally Posted by Zhaylin

Link. If they're piss ants (tiny and dark colored), they wont bite you.

Ooooh, so that's what you call them. Thanks for telling me that! I was worried that my eyes might be ripped apart by them. At least I can sleep better tonight knowing this.

Gosh...I'm so annoyed with my boyfriend right now...How does he always manage to chance my mood within 2 minutes? Yes, I mean I love him and everything and he truly is the one I want to spend the rest of my life with... But HELLZ! Sometimes I could just slap him!

Args!

lol Link. That's what my granny always called them. My hubby always shoots me a dirty look though when I use it around him I have no idea what they're really called but they love kitchens and seem to be drawn toward water. They also like soap and normal food droppings (sugar, cracker crumbs ect).
My hubby's been battling them since Spring. I even bought him some ant traps but they don't seem to be working. I've HEARD sprinkling Borax around window seals and cracks kills them, but you can't use it if you have pets (or small children).

Ceridwen. I know the feeling lol!!!

Things are continuing to suck... From the one phone call I had with my apartment complex while I'm at work, their story is that my check "bounced". This seemed pretty odd to me but I didn't check until after I'd gotten off the phone, and yeah. My balance had NEVER dipped low enough for that to be an option. Plus you think I'd hear from my bank if something like that happened. So I left another message telling them to look into it, and of course I've got no response.

Plus my whole work day was wasted due to various technical issues. I barely got anything done. As much as I complain about work, I hate rebelling technology even more.

Tommo: I work with Pearson Education right now, doing performance testing type stuff for their software. It's a huge, huge company, so I at least know this job isn't going anywhere, but... it makes things pretty chaotic.

Sorry for not responding to individual rants, guys... Things just feel like a trainwreck right now.

I think my son is coming down with something bad. He's been sleeping since 1:30PM this afternoon. I've woken him up a couple times and he got up briefly one of those times but he has avoided dinner and says he feels bad.

When a 14 y/o boy avoids grilled cheeseburgers and sleeps all day then something is really wrong.

Originally Posted by ThePreserver

Heart of Darkness

I heart Joseph Conrad

My rant: 3 simultaneous last minute special orders during the last 5 minutes of my shift.

Gonna start calling them "special DISorders"

Passive aggressiveness. I don't know why, but this pisses me off more than almost anything else.

I got asked to sign up to this digital children's book site after the owner saw my illustrations on a website and basically you team up with a writer or write your own books and illustrate them.
Then you get whatever amount of the sales.

Anyway, I teamed up with the woman who said she had heaps of stories and that, I didn't really like the first one, I had to make up an excuse for the second one she sent "I was thinking something more.... blablabla"
And the third one was still pretty meh, but I tried to force myself to do it, coz I knew if I did it for a publisher I'd have to illustrate crap books.

I told her it would take me a while since I'm busy with other things, and I'd only done 3 pages or so. But then I sort of just forgot about it after I rethought what career I want and how I want to spend my time etc. etc.
I was going tell her I couldn't do it anymore but it just wasn't something major that I was thinking about so I kept forgetting.

So she send this totally passive aggressive e-mail today and says WOW you must be really busy! etc. and tells me to delete it off the site coz she wants to do something else with it.

I mean, I really do get it and I feel bad for just forgetting, and for really agreeing to it in the first place.
But she could at least just not act so nice. I think that's the problem I have with it. They act nice but they obviously hate you.
Just fucking tell me I'm a dick for whatever I did. Stop that god damned passivity!

FUUUUU....

btw Ophelia your spiderweb lingerie photos have been re-posted for the 4th time now
Also you remind me, in one of those pictures especially, of this MILF in my class a couple of years ago.
But also I just got a like on a 3 year old thread which died after I posted and then you closed it ಠ_ಠ

I hope your son is doing better today Melanie.

I understand what you mean, Tommo. Passive-aggressiveness is one of my biggest pet peeves too.

My rant is that I have to drive over to the DHHR to give them my kids medical cards. My hubby failed to drop them off of his insurance when the State took them (and they provide Medicaide) so it's been causing a lot of insurance confusion.
I have to call hubby's office manager and have her drop the kids from the insurance but her hubby has been very sick so she's not been at the office for full days and I don't know when to reach her.

Tomorrow I have a meet and greet at my step-daughters college. I really hope **I** get horribly sick before then so I can bail out lol. In reality, I need to wash some clothes today so I'll have something to wear!!

My throats feeling much better though

Originally Posted by Zhaylin

Tomorrow I have a meet and greet at my step-daughters college. I really hope **I** get horribly sick before then so I can bail out lol. In reality, I need to wash some clothes today so I'll have something to wear!!

I'm sure you'll be fine in whatever you wear, you're a good person at heart, very compassionate and a DV member that I really respect. Your presence alone when you go there is good enough, it sucks that human society makes us put on a appearance for approval though, when our own personalities and character makes a bigger difference.

I hope you enjoy your time there!


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Whenever I think about lucid dreaming as a tool to find out what your subconscious is telling you, based on mantras trying to find resolve in conflicts, or just trying to understand its vague imagery in possibly interpreting what I'm trying to know...it's so hard to distinguish if it's merely apophenia or something truly useful.

But when I look at my dream signs, dream characters that I would like to meet, analyze the emotions I feel in them, even if they look random in my perception, and then find attributes of it transcend to the people I interact, people that I have insecurities with.....it gets harder to believe it's just apophenia.

When I close my eyes and think about most dreams I've experienced, everything comes together (at least for a situation I have with someone I care for in waking life), and I don't even set out to find it when I'm conscious in waking life, always relying on being conscious in dreams for the answers. Sometimes I wonder when I'm desperately trying to be lucid to verify those assumptions isn't necessary if I can just be content with using my brain for once and figure out these vague and what seems to be random patterns, and finding a connection with them instead of spoiling myself with lucid dreams with direct subconscious encounters.

But that's what apophenia really is, isn't it? And I know there are people who believe dreams are just random projections from your mind to create some kind of false meaning......

But tell me this,

When I think about my dream signs, dream characters, dream environments, emotions.....and when I connect them all to a desire I'm trying to resolve.....when my body is shaking from how these signs correlate to waking life, when I can't even hold back my tears from seeing these pieces fit together in a puzzle....tell me....if it comes to me without my desire to find reason in waking life, but only in dreaming life........is that really apophenia?

......................................and if it is, is everyone that has found meaning in their dreams, and have shown that it does transcend to their growing development in life....how can dreams be apophenia to some sense in people's minds?

It being merely apophenia just doesn't make sense at all.....not when my body is shaking periodically whenever I think about those so called "unrelated" dream signs and events, not when I feel like lying on the floor and just shrivel myself up into a ball.

Sorry, just wanted to vent that out.

How sweet of you. Thanks for the warm and fuzzies
But as for clothes... I literally have nothing to wear at this time except the clothes currently on me Everything's been too hectic and I've felt like crap too much to worry about laundry.

Apophenia. I had to look that one up.
I think it depends. If the dreams have meaning to YOU, that's all that matters. SOmetimes dreams ARE just a bunch of random fragments. I think the dreams of most people are like that because they don't care about dreams. But I think the desires of our heart- conscious and unconscious- manifest in our dreams as well. If you care to even look, I think you can find real meaning in some dreams.
I mean, even for basic stuff like remembering where the car keys are or the answer on a test, show up in the dreams of a lot of people. It's just the subconscious connecting the dots.
So why not help with bigger problems?

But if all dreams are meaningful messages from the subconscious then I'm in trouble lol. I dream a lot about death. A common theme is that I've killed someone and hidden them in the foundation or some lower level of a house and my crime is about to be discovered. My subconscious is trying to tell me something because it's a recurring dream. But I'm not sure I want to know what the message is lol

My current rant is a back spasm. WTH? Hopefully, it will work itself out soon. It's fine unless I move a certain way

I'm a little angry today.

A little throw-something at the wall and scream at the heavens angry.

I really need a glass of tea.

My duck has a respiratory infection. =/ I suspected that he might have had one for a while, but I had hoped that it would pass. It's gotten worse over the past few days, and now the area around his eye is pink--according to the Internet, that's somehow related. He's coughing and sneezing a lot too. I can't take him to the vet for a week and a half, so I really hope he gets better. He's obnoxious and dumb, but I like the little guy.

Geeeez... Making my last turn on my drive home today, I nearly ran someone over, and I'm the most careful driver I know. I still feel partially responsible, filled with "what ifs" and guilt-trips, like I should have seen him... and maybe I should have. I'm really trying not to feel too tore up over this though... because seriously, anyone who decides to skateboard across a busy intersection is DUMB. Even if you're in the road longer, walking is so much safer, because it gives you, the pedestrian, time to react. I know, I know, we're told in driver's ed that pedestrians always have the right of way. But we're only human, so would it be too much to ask that you're not suicidal? >.>

Link: As far as meaning in dreams, I honestly say it matters little whether the dreams are filled with meaning or not. To explain what I mean a bit better... if you derive meaning from them that's useful to you, and helpful in your life... does it matter whether the meaning was there to begin with, or whether you made it up? Whether you want to credit your observations to the pattern-engines that are always running in your conscious mind, or to your subconscious mind for deciding to encode meaning into them, it doesn't change their usefulness.

My personal opinion? Most of my dreams seem meaningless, but every now and then I have one that seems to have some little bit of truth to share. Those are the ones that don't seem to need interpretation, and I kind of know what they mean just from a quick glance. I mean, most of my dreams are about videogames, so I don't think they have deep truths to them.

Originally Posted by Linkzelda

Whenever I think about lucid dreaming as a tool to find out what your subconscious is telling you, based on mantras trying to find resolve in conflicts, or just trying to understand its vague imagery in possibly interpreting what I'm trying to know...it's so hard to distinguish if it's merely apophenia or something truly useful.

But when I look at my dream signs, dream characters that I would like to meet, analyze the emotions I feel in them, even if they look random in my perception, and then find attributes of it transcend to the people I interact, people that I have insecurities with.....it gets harder to believe it's just apophenia.

It has been shown in quite a few studies that dreams are not just random brain firings. The brain goes through things from RL, and we are better at things we've been practicing, after we dream.
This is evidenced by doing something repetitively for a few days and it will undoubtedly be in your dreams.

I find when I'm thinking about something, even a general "topic" or something for a while, I will dream about things related to that.
So it doesn't have to be the exact thing, or just your brain mirroring what you were doing in waking life.
Basically like my brain keeps thinking about those sorts of things I've been thinking about while awake, but in a different consciousness, which leads to different conclusions.

And fuck, if it is just random shit and you happen to find some meaning in it, who the fuck cares? At least you find some truth!

Originally Posted by Linkzelda

But that's what apophenia really is, isn't it? And I know there are people who believe dreams are just random projections from your mind to create some kind of false meaning......

Those people are probably the same ones who say they don't ever dream.
They don't know shit and pay no attention to higher levels of consciousness because they've been brainwashed to think about material goods only.

Science is proving dreams are not just random things. And hey, when you graduate you could join a research team studying this sort of thing and help find more answers!

LOL singularity, my eyes are still not open properly, and I'm a bit tired and I read your sentence as this

Originally Posted by Singularity125

Geeeez... Making my last turn on my drive home today, I usually run someone over

Melanie, Ducky, Singularity.

My current rant is that the internet is throttling us... but it's my fault for watching so much Hulu

1st world problems, i have a question.
I've had my mp3 for like 2 or 3 years now? It's an Ipod touch 3rd generation. The battery used to last for a super long time, up until a month or two ago, the battery just doesn't hold its charge very good at all (i've done nothing different either). I mostly use it for music (duh), then some internet and there's maybe a few apps that I use a lot. But it's just starting to falter...I have my phone but I don't like to put a lot of music on it (I have a bit over 1,000 songs on my ipod lol) because it slows it down, takes up more memory, etc. I just like to have a device solely for music and what not I was wondering, what might be a good mp3 to invest in? It doesn't necessarily have to be apple, but it seems like the only mp3's that are acknowledged are. A zune HD looks great, though it's from 09 it's not sold anywhere really except amazon, plus it might just be outdated (zune is discontinued). I personally like the zune interface and look better than apple, but that's just me. I don't even know if there are many other mp3's worth looking at. A new ipod touch is probably coming out this September (which my birthday is 24 days away xD) but i bet it's going to be 9000000000 (I'd need at least 16gb)$. I hate apple because once you buy something, an updated version comes along like 2 days later. And if I get another brand I don't know if I'd be able to put the music I bought from itunes on there? Heck, that probably won't even work if i get a new ipod! (i always have bad luck with that). This was a really long post, but does anyone know what kind I should buy

I got back at 5 AM from a 13 hour shift at work, slept until 4:00 in the afternoon. Made about $130 though so it was definitely worth it.

There's this girl working there who's super friendly, and I kinda get the feeling that she might be sorta kinda (lolgrammarzz) into me but I could be totally off. Idk. Anyway, she's ridiculously cute and all but she seems kind of young. Tbh, I can't tell because she's Asian. And I know I'm not the only person who can't tell how old Asians are just by looking at them. I know she's in high school though so that's a big lolnope anyway. :X

Oh and I fucked up on an order yesterday (I started working at this warehouse earlier this week) and the Asian woman in charge of the orders got mad. I'm pretty sure she thinks I'm retarded. :[

Originally Posted by tommo

LOL singularity, my eyes are still not open properly, and I'm a bit tired and I read your sentence as this

Aw, forum doesn't like nested quotes I guess. But that's just classic! I would totally admit to being a serial hit-and-runner here, right? We're all friends.

Ya know, I haven't really touched this Dreamcast since I saved it from the thrift store. Maybe I should hook it up and boot up Crazy Taxi. That oughta make me feel better about my driving.

To the uninitiated:

@Erii, Get the Zune HD

I had a long post, but I'm editing it out to just say, you will love the Zune HD. I've had it for 2 years, and it's still going strong. No lag whatsoever.

Originally Posted by GavinGill

I got back at 5 AM from a 13 hour shift at work, slept until 4:00 in the afternoon. Made about $130 though so it was definitely worth it.

There's this girl working there who's super friendly, and I kinda get the feeling that she might be sorta kinda (lolgrammarzz) into me but I could be totally off. Idk. Anyway, she's ridiculously cute and all but she seems kind of young. Tbh, I can't tell because she's Asian. And I know I'm not the only person who can't tell how old Asians are just by looking at them. I know she's in high school though so that's a big lolnope anyway. :X

Oh and I fucked up on an order yesterday (I started working at this warehouse earlier this week) and the Asian woman in charge of the orders got mad. I'm pretty sure she thinks I'm retarded. :[

What. the. fuck?
Don't you have maximum shift hours in Canada?
We can't have work shifts over 12 hours here, and that's pretty rare.. 8 is what most people work.

13 hours.... fuck that. Although if you've had some edibles that'd either fly by or seem to last an eternity.

Also don't you get extra pay for working through the night?
I just realised how good Australia's unions have been for us.

Originally Posted by Erii

1st world problems, i have a question.
This was a really long post, but does anyone know what kind I should buy

Originally Posted by Linkzelda

@Erii, Get the Zune HD
I had a long post, but I'm editing it out to just say, you will love the Zune HD. I've had it for 2 years, and it's still going strong. No lag whatsoever.

R.I.P. Zune - NYTimes.com

There was nary a mention of Zune, an existing Microsoft music and movie service, at the E3 event where Xbox Music was announced. But afterward, a Microsoft spokeswoman, Melissa Stewart, confirmed that the Zune brand is going away so Microsoft can use the better-known Xbox brand for its entertainment services, including its online video service.

Originally Posted by melanieb

R.I.P. Zune - NYTimes.com

I have a Zune... I love it. My brother and mom both have one, too. We're a weird family.

At least they left the marketplace open; it's basically the Microsoft Music marketplace anyways.