What follows is an exchange of ours from a long while back:
Originally Posted by StephL
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Buut - maybe 5 times or so - I started "making something" out of what I saw on the back of my eyelids.
After some time of black - there were black and white and grey clouds swirling about - I could make these take on forms - and with a certain complexity - a real scenery appeared, and got clearer and clearer - each time another one.
But it was so weird - every time I came to see real details full colours and all - there was an almost physical surge to draw me into the scene, which before I had only witnessed "from nowhere" so to speak.
And every time, I just could not let it happen, not on purpose, it was more or less unbconscious direct reaction.
I sucked myself back out.
It was really like having a short startle reaction, physical arousal went up a bit - and like on a gummy-band - I got my consciousness back in my body on my bed.
And had to more or less start all over again.
As said - it was several times, and I really tried to be prepared for it, and let it happen the next time..
Nope.
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Originally Posted by Sageous
Your experience as I see it was not so much close to a WILD, Steph, but an actual successful WILD dive...with one small exception.
It seems that you managed to fall asleep while maintaining awareness (the WILD part), but there was no dream "waiting" for you -- in other words, you were in NREM, or delta sleep.
Much of what you describe above sounds remarkably like many of my excursions into delta. So there is a chance that you did everything right, but your body simply wasn't in its REM period yet. Trying to form a dream without the presence of REM can indeed yield the results that you got.
I think that "startle" reaction you kept getting was probably pretty normal too, because your mind was in a truly novel place, and focusing on it might have required too much of the stuff that wakes you up.
How to avoid this? Patience. If you're having trouble finding your dream, or are encountering odd phenomena like you did, simply assure yourself that it will pass and your dream will eventually form (or, perhaps, your dreaming mind will eventually permit you to form a dream). In other words, think of events like this for now* as just more noise, and ignore them. By ignoring them, you should reduce the overreaction you experienced and be able to hold your focus until the dream actually starts.
* Note that I said "for now," above. That's because later, when WILD is second nature to you, you might find delta sleep an interesting condition to explore and enjoy. For now it might be an obstacle, but later it might be something very, very interesting!
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That was in a WBTB attempt.
I have now made another experience exactly like that one some nights ago.
And it looks, you were spot on with guessing, I had strayed into delta that night.
Because this time, I had tried WILDing directly when going to bed - inspired by your delta-thread.
And it felt exactly the same again, and I didn't have that in my two only WILD attempts at WBTB, that had conjured up any effect - even if just in the form of strong vibrations plus at the first time a vision of a mandala.
This time again - when I looked at the back of my eyelids - after a while I got some grey swirling with some colours too - and then - like in a flash a detailed, very vivid scene, out of almost nothing, and I felt a strong surge towards it - and at the same time or shortly after - I almost physically bounced back from it.
I didn't feel, I had been dream-bodily present anywhere in that scene - I can't explain the surge-thing properly.
This is something else than me getting distracted and excited these two times with HH/HI.
It feels so strong - it overtakes me - I felt completely unable to get over it.
There is a very unique bodily feeling associated - around the chest - I do not know what to call that - but it has something positively exciting - almost blissful.
I went to that state of getting sucked 4 times - I was psychologically prepared to just let - well anything - happen.
But the startle was too strong for me.
Fascinating, though - I'd like to experiment further!
Do you have a special tip for how to deal with this getting overwhelmed for me?
I mean yeah - patience and further stabs at normal WILD - definitively - but if you could help me with this, too - I would be very thankful!
Getting there seemed surprisingly easy - but well - so felt learning WILD, getting to my strong HH/HI on second try and after 2 min. - but then followed weeks and weeks of nothing.
Then around a week ago in a classical WILD-try - I had the same procedure - got distracted by HH - had been such a long time, I didn't even expect them..
But also around that time - I managed my first real non-lucid to LD DEILD - haven't reported that yet in here - shame on me.
I heard one of my auto-snooze alarms - waited it out without any reaction - there was a very short, strangely peaceful feeling moment, totally black - and then a stable scene turned up - and I was there. No noises whatsoever - and of course I didn't try to move.
Lying face-down - fittingly, what I first saw, was the ground from around bed-height up - covered in decorative pebbles.
It started with an oval of maybe a meter to half a meter and expanded from there.
Only now comes to my mind, why such a curious perspective!
I had been conscious almost only of my bodyposition, while awake - but that seems to have played into the construction of the first scene!
I didn't fall on the floor from 40 cm on entering the LD, though - I somehow came to stand there - can't answer, how.
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