A World In My Head!!

April 5, 2010

Synopsis: In two different dreams I question if I am dreaming, but the dream keeps fooling me!

Night Time Note: I wake up! I remember my first dream of the night. But by the time I grab my pen, roll over to jot down on my pad - I don't understand it. My logical mind didn't understand the dream and I could see the memory of it just fading. I close my eyes and struggle to retain the memory in some way I can understand it. I quickly write with my eyes closed "Know landscape is weird?".

I vaguely remember talking to someone about a landscape. This person pointed out to me that this landscape is weird. This person seemed to understand that this was a dream!

Dreams That Fool Me
In the next dream....I was at school again. This time I had worked hours on a lengthy project. My teacher sneers at it, muttered something disrespectful and walked away. I felt deflated! I could never please this teacher . As the class starts to critique I'm lost thinking in my head "What if this was all a dream?". I put my hand on the wall, and I pressed up against it just to feel how solid it was. And I kept sighing, "If only it was a dream! That would be so sweet. I hate this class!" I shake my head instead and tell myself, I'm only wishing that it is a dream. I woke up shortly after deciding it was all real.

You bet I woke up annoyed!

I had another dream that also fooled me. As I walked home I magically had two Kitties! Kitty number one runs indoors, but Kitty number two is running around outside. I try to chase her down to bring her inside where it's nice and safe, but I lose her. Oh well, I least I still have Kitty number one. It goes completely over my head that there should only be..ONE Kitty.

Something is very strange. I can't quite put my finger on it, but I know something is very strange. I question if I am dreaming. I turn on the light switch. At first it did nothing. Then after a long time, the light finally turned on. I knew that switches worked strange in dreams, but I told myself this is normal because we've got some bad electrical wiring that really does cause a delay. This is a difficult reality check for me. (In the waking I have to try several times to turn on the bathroom light.)

I go to my room, but I feel even weirder in here. Claustrophobic! I also have trouble seeing, it's so foggy in my room. I feel really uncomfortable and go back to the living room. I tell myself I'm just being paranoid since I'm home alone.

I'm writing in my journal, and again I question if this is a dream, because something feels wrong. I recheck what I wrote, but it's perfectly normal. I can read it just fine and I can reread it again! I tell myself, if this really was a dream it wouldn't be possible. Writing is weird in dreams right? But I kept holding the pen in my hand and examining it, something was odd but I couldn't figure out why.

Mom comes home and tells me she saw Kitty outside. But it goes over my head. Instead I start complaining that I can't see in my room. She checks out my room and confirms she can't get the lights to work at all. She described my room as being 'foggy'. To hear someone else call my room foggy, something in my silly head starts to click! I must be dreaming!

Just as I become lucid I wake up. I'm disorientated, I don't recognize this room at all. Where am I? I try to recall if I'm spending the night some where, but I don't remember visiting anyone last night. My gay uncle comes in the room and I become fixated on his bright green fingernails! It's the color I've been trying to become in my dreams.

I wake up shortly after, annoyed the FA fooled me. But remembering something is better than remembering nothing.