non-lucid

01.11.14

Last night bed 10:30pm - 7am

Had a lots of dreams.

Dream before last:
I'm in someone elses household. I have my 2 cats with me. The lady of the house tells me, she got a kitten. I'm mad, because they already have 2 cats and those will not like a kitten. Then I see the kitten, and another one, and then another one. So she brought 3 kittens to the house.

There is something about some people that just came being witches. They look normal, but I sense something sinister from them. I don't remember much else, only that they finally showed their true nature and I was fighting them somehow. Or defying.

Last dream at 7am:

I'm in a dark room. It's large and it could be a cellar, or some underground place. The only light coming in is from the stairs going up, on the left.

I'm laying down on some low platform. There are monsters around me. I'm being accused of something. I say yes, I did that, but it was not the way they think. One of them says that I have to die for it. I plea with them, or at least think about pleaing. But then I think that I have never experienced death in dream before and I wouldn't mind experiencing it. So I'm trying to think where I would want to direct him to place the spear. He has it against the middle of my chest. I'm thinking if leg would would be sufficient, but somehow I know it would not.

01.05.14

Nap in the afternoon.

I work with languages. But now they want me to act in a movie, because my lines are suppose to be spoken in another languages that I speak. I say ok, I'm nt an actor, but whatever.

I'm suppose to prove something, so I'm looking at checkout receipts. I have all of them, but the one that counts. So I say the hell with it. I don't need this shit.

I'm suppose to get out of someplace. I peek into one room, looks like there are opening in the wall that ae dark, partially blocked by some couldrons. Don't like the feel of it and get out. A monster like, mutated human gets out with me. I'm telling him to stay the fuck away or he is gonna get it. He doesn't listen, comes after me and I kick his ass.

Jan 4. 2014

Last night bed 12-1 am - 10:15 am

Had a bunch of dreams. Woke up, recalled a dream, but didn't write it down. Then had some more dreams.

DR:
I'm with classmates. My moms kitchen. Sitting down with others for some "orientation". Something goes wrong and I leave. I'm now in some water park. Thinking which water shoot I'll go down to escape. Looking inside some tubes, some are closed off.

I'm walking away by a sea wall. Want to just sit down and be looking at the ocean and sunset. But I also want to go down to the beach to collect seashells.

Classmate is running after me. Giving me some papers. A small kid is pick-pocketing me. I grab his arm and start asking who is his parent. I drag him by some people standing outside their one story houses. From the look on one guys face, and scared look on boys face I know that guy is his dad. Inside of the house a woman laying on bed is throwing up blood. Lung cancer. That's why that man sent his kid to steal. I still don't like it but now I understand. I don't know how to help them.

12.29.13

Last night bed past midnight - 9:45am

Had a few dreams last night, or should I say, I remembered a few.

DR1:

(Disturbing. Or they used to be. I have not had a dream like this in a while. Only this time I was not scared. Only uncomfortable.) I'm standing on a narrow street with one story houses lining it. I'm near a doorway. There is a funeral procession. Two boys had died. Brothers, ages about 5 and 9. Caskets are light brown, shiny. They are coming closer, and as usually, I have no place to escape to.

They end up entering room next to me. I don't want to see any of it. I somehow look and I see both brothers laying next to each other, dressed in suits. They mouth are open and I see inside. I really didn't want to because now I reallize this image will stay with me when WILDing. I get a mental image of a swimming pool they had drowned in. It could have been their sisters pool.

I'm standing in the next room and holding the door shot with my foot. I really don't wanna see. But there is a large gap under the door and I see a tiny, rusty colored kitten walk up to the door. I know that's one of the brothers wanting to say goodby. I'm a bit scared now, but I open the door so kitten can say goodby. Somebody picks him up and holds him next to my face.

DR2:
We are packing and evacuating to Hawaii, because of some natural disaster is suppose to happen.

DR3:
We are going to a chinese restaurant. We are picking from pre-fix menu and older chinese waiter is taking our orders. There is salad, spring rolls and something else. There is four of us. When we sit down, it looks like I ordered the most food.

Something about some red truck parked outside and someone putting a sign on it. Then I'm talking to a guy about it but he knows nothing.

12.26.13

Last night bed 1:08 - 7:46

I'm in a south american country, maybe peru. I'm on a dusty hill with just a few shrubs. On the bottom are few houses, leaning onto the steep slope. One seems like a small local restaurant. (that day watched episode of Bizarre foods, where they were joking about eating half digested small fish from larger fishe's stomach) There is a throw up on the ground and I'm pulling a garden hose closer to hose it off.

I'm standing up high on the retaining wall and chasing dirty water into the canal grates. Somebody is picking through it, and I have a feeling that's the host from Bizarre foods. We are about to leave, so this is a last thing before I leave. But first I have to shut down the water. So I walk on the hill slope to the nearby baseball field (watched episode of Modern Family that night, in which Carol built a baseball field out of the dusty, only few shrubs vacant lot).

I get down to the dugout to look for pipes to shut the water off. I find someone else to help me figure out the correct wheel to turn.

Now we are on a local bus, either ready to leave, or already on the road. But we are stopped now and gunman with kalashnikov's are boarding. I have a feeling now that we are still in Peru, but also in Afrika, because of the looks of the gunman.

Just before they boarded, someone on the adjacent seat is showing someone his machine gun. I recognize it immediately. It's Berrett M60 and I say so, as I admire it. I pick it up and and check it out. I notice, that my hands are unsteady because of it's weight and I realize I would need to use a bipod to shoot it effectively. http://www.allmilitaryweapons.com/20...ult-rifle.html

Someone else has another assault rifle. When these gunman are about to board, I switch seats and sit down next to the guy with assault rifle. It's wraped in a t-shirt and I'm urging him to pull it out and shoot the gunman. But he is scared.

I return to my seat. As the gunman walk through the front door of the bus, I sense danger. These are types of people, that will smack you in your face with a rifle butt without any reason. So I raise my hands and lock them behind my head. I bow my head down slightly to show them I'm no threat to them, and to avoid direct eye contact. I'm not scared, I know I will be ok.

They walk past me and I watch them in a rear view mirror pull a young african girl out of her seat. I know exactly why and I wonder if same will happen to me. One of the gunman stands behind me and starts to feel me up, if I'm worth taking.

Then I see the guy with a machine gun running away from the bus, down the dusty hill, to escape. I yell at him to wait for me.

Now I'm in some kind of a fox-hole with others. I'm looking at my assault rifle. It's very modern, all black composite materials. The barrel has deep ridges. It also has a short scope. I look through it and I can't see anything. So I look at the scope and it has a slot end cap. I like it, it means I can still see through it, but the sun reflection from the glass will not give away my position. But now it's all closed so I turn the small lever to open it. Just in time, because we are being overrun. I raise it up and start firing single shots. Every one of them hits the taget. Attackers are falling down left and right. Some of them outflank us and start lobbing granades. I pick them up and lob them back. No real sense of danger.

12.25.13

Last night bed around 1am - 8:50am
Last week or so, I have been going to bed around 11pm, because I have started new work. It's very hectic and tiring as hell.

When I have recall, it's about this new work, and also working on DV. I'm off today and tomorrow and ready to do some serios sleeping and dreaming. And remembering.

EDIT:
OMG, just as I clicked on save, I remembered a crazy dream from last night. All about sex. I think I was disturbed by reading somebodys comment in chat last night. Oh, and also something about what my friend OP said, hahah.

DR:
So, I'm in a group of 5-7 people. I and one other person are older, and in position of authority of some kind. We are both same sex. We are walking into some building. Not really hotel, because rooms are free. It's in the near future. More modern than today, but still very familiar and not too futuristic.

We are in the hallway and by touching the door, it opens. It's made out of translucent glass. Three of us take rooms right next to each other. We know we are there to have sex. We just not sure who with whom, or if some others are coming. I'm sitting with this other adult, I think it's my favorite teacher, and I'm wondering if she is thinking to do it with me. Because I'm thinking "NOT". We are there to only supervise.

DR:
Could be same dream, but now it's only me. Same sexual athmosfere.

12.08.13

Last night bed 11:50 - 8:15

DR upon awakening

I'm walking someplace outdoors. A field of grass, near some small, overgrown pond. I'm with my brother. At the edge of the water we find a large piece of plastic. About 7 feet wide, more angular than round. It has low sides, lower than 1 inch. It gently slopes to the middle. There are a few tiny opening on the sides and the middle. It's off-white. It is full of small baby ducklings and baby chicken. I realize the plastic tray is there to trap them. Once they step into it, the slope doesn't allow them to get out, because it's slipery.

We start looking around for an owner of the ducklings. We check one farmhouse that's nearby. Then we see someone working in the huge yard at the other farmhouse. We walk inside and talk to the guy, then to the lady. They think we are there for a job. In fact, we are looking for a job for a friend of ours. We walk around the house for a while. Guy is putting on shoes and he thinks I'm there to get a car repair job, or some woodworking thing.

Suddenly my brother tells me to leave. I ask him why and he tells me, that he has a funny feeling about the people there. He says, that the woman gave him a 100 year stare. And he showed me, how was she staring at him, not blinking. So we left.

12.07.13

Last night bed 1:30am - 9:40am

DR 5:48am

I'm on a bus trip with class. We are driving along a concrete canal, that's filled with nice water to the top. On the slope of the canal, across from water, there are large graves. All encasted in marble, all different colors of whites and greys and blacks. We are visiting this town, where something bad happened. I think half the town burned down.

I recognize my former teacher UH and we joke about something sex related.

We are leaving the hotel we were staying in. I'm last one to leave. I still want to take a shower, so I walk into the bathroom. The floor is freshly washed and my UGGs are making dirty footprints. I have to find a rag and wipe it clean, while it's still wet. The shower stall is already wiped dry as well, even new soap and pink plastic scrubby thing is replaced for a new one. I hate to make a mess again.

Someone with knife walks outside the building and I follow him. I know he is about to be shot by police, when they yell at him to throw down his weapon. I drop my pistol and I'm trying to get closer to this guy to protect him from being shot. But he raises his hand and takes an aim at the police, who are across the canal. They shoot him, before I'm able to get in front of him. I'm devastated.

9:30
Someone left us $700 000. I walk into a small both to count the money. There is only 17x $100 bills. Then I notice, they are not bills, but sheets of 17 $100 bills. There is 170 sheets.
Today, 12.8.13, I got my new ID card, and it consists of 0s, 1s, and 7s. Hrm, pretty cool. After this dream, I was actually thinking of getting lottery with these numbers, because I felt they are significant.

I'm downstairs at my aunts, cleaning, while my whole extened family is upstairs, at my moms. We are all going somewhere. They are waiting for me. I walk outside. It's nightime. There is some snow on the ground, and everything is icy. Everybody who didn't fit in the cabin is in the back of the pickup truck. I say that's not safe. Even if we don't cause an accident, someone else may and we will get hurt. So they put me in the cab and I hate that, and they hate me for it.

We arrive to the train station to continue our trip. ( I saw a picture Ophelia posted today of her white pickup truck parked outside her house, with everything encased in ice. Rare winter snow and ice for Dallas area).

12.06.13

Woke up at 9am sharp. Spent all day on DV. Read Ophelia's last DJ entry, how she "opened her eyes" and went on with a LD.
I have tried that before, but couldn't keep eyes opened for longer than few seconds. But I know, that if I read something often enough, it will start working for me too. I did a WBTB day before, but never got back to wilding. So I thought today is the day. Even, if it was exactly 6 hrs after waking up in the morning. My normal morning nap is 1-3 hrs after.

I kept saying "when I see, I wake up", and "I'm dreaming", "open your eyes and see". I was getting relaxed just minutes after starting. I was also saying "I'll notice vibrations".

Next 2 hrs, I spent falling asleep, waking up, I think I got 2 LDs, in which I started waking up as soon as I realized and I said "oh,, great, I'm lucid, now let's do it again for real". And there vere some dreams sexual in nature. Just before I got up at 5, I spent good 10 min, if not longer, in a transition. I tried to levitate up, trying to move my arms, I felt my chest getting heavier and it was a great feeling. I was pushing my head back to invoke the falling feeling, and for a minute, I actually felt, as if I was summersaulting to the front. I got headrush a few times. But the whole time, maybe I was too awake, because I was not able to cross the threshhold. Maybe because of THE NOISY NEIGHBORS.

Oh, I was also asking my guide to pull me out. But I think I was too pushy about it. Too excited. I should have just let it happen, instead of wishing for it.

No matter, it was 2 hrs well spent and I enjoyed every minute of it. I knew it will be great even before I started. THANK YOU.

11.05.13

Last night bed around 1am. Want to wake up early, like yesterday, and WILD again, like yesterday.

DR1
I'm walking through a pedestrian bridge over Danube, on the Slovak/Hungarian border. This bridge is not there in WL. The railing is metal bars, and it looks like the walkway is metal too, with some gaps and holes, as if from lack of maintanace.

Lots of people walking on it. I see this very old a frail woman, holding onto the bars from the outside of the bridge, thrying to cross it that way. Old man is doing the same thing, right next to her. I sense, they are somehow different, than others on the bridge.

I ask her why, and she says "so when I lose grip, wind will blow me against the bridge and I won't fall". I grab both her wrists and pull her to the walkway, before she has a chance to fall or realize, what I'm doing. I'm surprised, how light she is. I start to explain to her in fluent Hungarian, that if she loses her grip ooutside of the walkway, where is she gonna fall? She says "water". And I ask: "and if you lose your grip while on the walkway? Where will you fall then?" She says "to the walkway". I'm happy that she gets it and she is no longer in danger. I'm also surprised a bit, how long of time did I spend on talking to her and explaining to her in a way, so she would understand.

DR2
I'm on a sidewalk in my hometown. There is something about a broken part on some machine. So I go the another machine and take some part from it and try to make it fit to make repairs. I think I succeed.

Monday 12.02.13

Last night bed 11:30pm

I'm in a garden at my childhood house. Lots of people there. There is a man, that is walking around the cellars hallway and also the yard. He walks around slowly, with sinister purpose. I have a gun and it seems like i also have ammo. It's in a small ammo box. Ammunition is small, golden in color, or yellow brass.

I tell someone to lock all their doors and to call my mom and others to stay in their apartments. That's when i see my mom, cluelessly peeking out of one of the doors leading to the yard. I yell at her to get back inside and lock the doors.

In the meantime, I keep shooting the guy, with no effect. I keep reloading the gun, but now the bullets are getting all messed up. They are tiny, deformed, and mixed in with stuff like lint and other stupid things. The intruder is now heading towards us. So I run up to him and knock him out cold.

I'm asking a neighbor if I should call 911, or the non-emergency number. She says non-emergency, since we got him neutralized.

Saturday 11.30.13

DR1 - I'm walking through a city that looks like my hometown. But it's not, It's Poland. We walk in a bar, that's just a hole in a a wall. Arched wooden doors. It's packed. We sit at a small, round, high table. There are couples everywhere. Except, they are not really couples. I think they just paired up after arrival. And not all are happy with the way they are paired up. We realize we came to the wrong bar.

DR 2 - I'm walking through a city again. This time it's Australia. I can clearly feel the distance from my home continent. I'm on the other side of the world. We see some ladies walk by and ask them for some good, not too expensive restaurant. They laugh. There is nothing that't not expensive.

DR3 - Still in Australia. I'm talking about a job offer in Bendi national Park. Sitting in managers office at the visitor's center. Sliding glass door behing me is opened and I have a view of a man-made small animal pool. Water is greenish, as if full of algae. I see a snake swimming in the water. I call my mom to look, but by then, it had turned to a crocodile. I'm excited to see a crocodile.

Still in Australia. now talking to different people about a job. I follow a female manager to a mess hall. A male manager tells me, that he has two openings - one is a manager of 2 workers in a dining room. Can't remember the other one.

11/27/13 Wednesday

Last night, bed at 2am, no meditation

I'm in Italy. Second time in maybe 2 weeks. I'm at the docs, looking at some ships docked. One of them is military ship, that serves as a museum. Suddenly there is an explosion on it. I see red flames and black smoke. It's already third explosion in the area. Some kind of terrorist attack. (Watched NCIS episode with explosions and terror attacks)

Still in Italy. I have a puppy in my arms. He is not mine, but perhaps rescued. It's a beagle. He has flees, so we are taking him to the vet. Come to a building, with patients waiting on chairs outside and in the doorway. I try to talk to them in Italian. I want to know if I can buy something for the flees in the pharmacy, or if I should see the vet. When we walk inside, the building is huge and modern. medical personal walking busily in the hallways. We find the vet and he takes a look at the dog. Then he puts him in this room sized plastic tube. Kinda like a huge terrarium. It can fold in the middle, one side can slide in the other side. We are thinking about buying it for the dog. Trying to figure out, if it will fit on the back of a pickup. I see the price in italian lira and it's like 39000. I see that in some places it's broken and fixed with black tape. So I'm telling my mom, we could buy it, but not to pay for it more than 1/5 of the asking price.

It was a long time I have spent in Italy this time.

Sunday 11.24.13

Last night, bed around midnight. 3rd night in a row meditating on bed before sleep. 3rd night nice, interesting dreams.

DR
Going through a futuristic building with my futuristic rifle. It has a small screen, laser sights, and a few control buttons. I'm leading a group of people out of there.

I take up a position behind some concrete blocks, with my back to the wall. I take an aim at the distant door on top of short stairwell. We are expecting the enemy. The door opens and enemy soldiers in black, shiny uniforms walk cautiously inside. I see my gree laser dot and stream is on them, but my rifle had shot down. I fumble with the controls to turn it back on.

Saturday 11/23/13

Last night, bed around midnight. Meditated sitting on bed for 10-15 min.

Morning dream

I'm a human with superpowers. With some friends in some city. I need a watch, so I ask them where to get one. The store I wanted to go get the watch from is closed and another store is opened in it's place. The neghboring clothing store expanded and took over rest of the small stores in the strip mall. So I ask my friends which hotel is the best in town, so I go and get the watch from their gift shop. Distance or difficulty getting there doesn't bother me, since I can fly or teleport anywhere easily.

Now we are walking on a city sidewalk, heading someplace. A small kid, maybe 13 year old comes up to me and asks me for sx. He is in a black and white striped t-shirt. His face is dirty, as if he didn't wash himself in days. His nose is full of dirty snot. I can see it clearly moving, as he is breathing. He has his friends with him. I stop to talk to them and I tell my friends to go ahead, I'll catch up with them.

Boys lead me to one of the nearby houses in the Barrio. Place doesn't really have streets, just some mud paths between houses. The house is really opened, as you would expect it to be in tropical climate. Lot's of very thin, yellowish, see through window curtains on opened windows. They look more like mosquito nets.

There is a large bed with white sheets. Some neighbors are looking through the large windows and the courtains. Courtains are blowing in the wind. I tell this boy to send the neighbors away. I have a feeling they were there to observe the spectacle. That what's about to happen is not something that unusual, but rather happens on regular bases. There is more people coming to the house. I also tell the boy that if he thinks I'm gonna do it with all of them, to think again. And ffs, to go and wash up.

(Rest is for my paper dj only)