MoSh's DJ: The Best Dream Journal in The Universe.

Jamie dreams are kinda back? They are few and far in between but still somehow consistent. She might have done a drive by I was brushing off my car. A grey car turned in the alley by my house behind me. It felt like someone was looking at me. I turned and saw part of a head with brown hair and sunglasses. The voice mentioned it may have been her. If so, this is becoming more often. She's getting braver.

Jamie 1

I was in a long non lucid dream that was boring. Me and Jamie met in the middle of the dream. We both briefly talked about the plot of the dream we were in and moved on. Can't remember what was said or the rest.

unsure?

I was in... I'm not sure I had an ipad or something. I was selecting music. The band: Helloween, came to mind. Couldn't figure out if I wanted to hear, "Eagle fly free." or, "Dr. Stein." but then the tablet menu went funny and I couldn't find it. The tablet was suddenly hanging by string around a girl's neck. It was now a white board that we could write messages on. Not sure if this was Jamie or not.

Fighting

I was with a younger guy also named. "Raven." (Not my other dream friend. who does healing songs and stuff.) He was the native guy I ran into one day in the Wal-Mart parking lot when Jamie was giving me a ride home. In the dream he was getting mouthy. So I pounded his face in for a bit. Then I said something like, "Respect your elders." or something and he backed off.

More fighting

I think me and Jamie were in a fortnite game or something. We were walking through a valley and someone shot at us. Jamie got knocked and she was doing the crawl. The shooter grappled over to us with his duo. He told me to Res her so he can kill her again. I said, "If you kill her I will definitely find you and kill you." We went back and forth a few times like that and he backed down.

New fortnite season tomorrow. I have a love/hate relationship with that game. Mainly hate the cringe and the super toxic community.

Jamie again

This morning after our bedtime sweet talk session we often have in our heads. I was in an HH dream she was there. She made lasagna and offered me some.

I enjoyed that dream.

very low recall despite going to bed early some nights and sleeping in.
The new From episode came out. I noticed it was out saturday night after 10. Usually I don't check until sunday but I let Her voice know. I was watching an earlier episode and her voice said the latest was. "Completely fucked." I watched it... and it was. They keep piling on the mysteries of the show without solving much.

Dreams were such low detail they are not even worth titles. 3 Jamie dreams. one in her house. Another of her crying in a car. and another where I felt her presence. other non lucids were not interesting. Just B movie type dreams. I'll try to get better recall soon.

I did see the shooting start thing again. I was outside early morning having a smoke after going to the bathroom. The Jamie voice was saying she was really liking something when I saw the meteor or whatever it was.

One morning the voice kept asking me to say the same prayer over and over again. Her tone seemed mean, as if what I was doing was pathetic. Her voice apologized later in the day. This morning my dog ran away but came back an hour later. My sweet time with the voice was interrupted because I was driving around Bowden from 5:30 am until after 6.

From

I was in Fromville again. The Mathews kids were trying to build a plane or helicopter.

The Jamie voice apparently says that she is enjoying the show... Can't be sure tho.

Work

I was working with my Dad in a large room. Jamie was standing by a door but being quiet. She looked Asian at times.

Jamie 2

Me and Jamie were in a TV show or something. We left the TV set and we were in a house that seemed to be ours. I asked her if she liked the show. She said that she did. She placed a purse on the kitchen table. A bunch of womanly padded products fell out of the purse. One fell on the floor. I picked it up and put it on the table. Jamie was just staring at me.

Maybe this dream is Jamie explaining what was wrong with her the one morning? Maybe her testing me to see if it's another thing I have to contend with should we...

Not many dreams. Jamie drive by again? I was pulling into the Reddi-mart to pull out some cash. Noticed the one car with the wannabe red but not quite color. Stared intently inside... I saw a woman with brown hair, sort of like Jamie but unsure. She seemed to notice I was looking her way and she defiantly turned her gaze to the side (but was probably just shoulder checking for oncoming traffic before turning.). moments later while inside... her voice started up. "Why did I do that? I'm sorry." Her voice was apologizing non stop throughout the day. Her crime - Doing the freezout thing. I mean I'll try my best to let it slide. Even though her voice promised me that she would not do that anymore. I'll admit when I worked with her - it was an extremely frustrating thing to deal with. I have never liked it, don't currently like it, and never will. Experiencing that currently kind of doesn't help. Remember - I'm absolutely certain I have at least mild traits of BPD myself. The worst thing for me emotionally is to consistently re live past trauma. It's bad enough that I currently live with my dad, even though he is getting old and feeble - He still is emotionally abusive. Constantly scoffing in disappointment over every single thing I do. Also Boomer parents, "Why don't my kids wanna see me.?" I'm absolutely positive Jamie reads these, so please take these things into consideration. I have stated a lot on this journal, that I am trying my best to work on my issues around her, so that I can be a safe place for her. It should go both ways. I'm dedicated to being sensitive and accommodating to her issues, and working it out with her with good communication. I however, expect the exact same thing from her. Because if me mentioning in a dream how long it's been since we've talked and how salty I am about it is going to trigger her badly into a splitting episode, What does she think ignoring me in outright defiance does to me? It's a fine line - walking on eggshells. And I do pray everyday that Jesus somehow solves her BPD issues. There's a guy on Tik tik sensitive.stability - a self proclaimed self cured BPD guy that has a program for trying to be symptom free. It probably costs money, but it might be worth it for us to check it out. It's loosely based on DBT. Another thing is that her voice keeps asking for prayers, when we both gt upset at this stuff. That's really good. Wether the prayers are getting answered or not, it's a good thing that seems to help us stay grounded with one another.


On a lighter note. If Jamie wants to talk to me I imagine we are going to have some pretty awkward initial conversations. Somehow I don't think,"Hey there Captain Booty cheeks, are you ready to make that daughter we've been dreaming about? Or are you chicken?" is going to work well.

Dreams:

first night: Nothing, except a flash of Jamie coming up to me and hugging me.

Night after her apparent) run in.


Wal-Mart

I was in a Wal-Mart with some native girl who wanted to be my girlfriend. I saw a Woman I recognized as Shannon M from didsbury (Nice trailer park lady who worked at Hi-Ho for years. Has a couple kids - one borderline daughter with a kid) I'm like "Hey!" And the woman (Possibly Jamie.) started hugging me from behind really tightly and kissing the back of my neck in the same spot over and over again. I was walking as she did this. The Native girl was staring at me funny. I said, "I know this lady I worked with her at Wal-Mart for 5 months or so." (In reality I never worked with shannon but the line implies I was recognizing Jamie). The dream seems to end there.

The voice was still insistent that the van I saw Monday was Jamie. Even though I seen a similar grey van at the same store driven by an older brown haired lady. The voice argued that there's lots of grand caravans in the area. This is true. Her voice complained later, " How come you pretend I'm not there when I visit?" Well... Driving by someone goes quick. Sometimes her sightings don't leave me room to visibly react. One apperrent drive by was at night and I could barely make out the shape of a face. And I couldn't literally see inside the van well because of the lighting. Depending on light reflecting off a windshield can determine how much you see inside someone's vehicle.

Uncle again

I was almost lucid. I spoke like I knew it was a dream. I saw my uncle lying on a cot with some woman. I asked if his name was his name. He said yes. I told him not to come into my dreams anymore. I don't remember much after.

One night I woke up at 2 am and Jamie's voice kept asking for prayers because of a nightmare. Was she watching "From?" - It gave her nightmares. I have heard that Borderlines can have excruciatingly long and vivid frequent nightmares.

Raven

A brief dream where I saw Raven. Can't remember details tho.

Jamie 1

Brief flash of her holding me in bed.

Possibly Jamie?

Started off, I was in a shopping mall. I was in a Zellers or Sears like store. Some women in medical clothing were testing someone. It turns out they had a contagious disease. They said they had to quarantine the area and since I was a few times away that meant me. They put some weird medical gown on me.. more like a vest. Then they brought me a Hazmat suit. This was interrupted by a horde of people running through the store in a panic. The medical people ran away too. I tore off the vest and looked two the double doors leading outside. Another horde of people were running outside as well.

I took off and went down a hallway. Went through a door onto a street. No one was running so 8 figured I was past the danger. I felt I was near Jamie's place so I went up these garden paths separated by plastic bubbles with zip up doors. I was on a hill looking down at at garden being tended by an older lady with brown hair. I knew who she was. I had seen that lady lots in dreams at Jamie's house. Not sure if she's a guide or guardian.

I went through the next zipper door, and I was quite confused as to where I was. Inside was a living room. A woman that looked like Jamie was sleeping on a couch. I woke her up and asked how to leave? She got up and said she would help. Her hair went from long to shorter with the ends by her chin. She said, "Make sure you give me a hug and a kiss before you leave. " I thought since she no longer looked like Jamie, that she was someone else... That it might be cheating. I gathered some things that I had left there including a gun. Jamie didn't seem bothered by that. I tucked it into a side pocket or purse. She looked like Jamie again and I was waiting for my hug. Jamie went into a kitchen then and she looked like someone else. An older man was suddenly with her. They were talking. I figured it was the woman's husband. She no longer seemed aware that I was there so I left.

Really tired, I'll try to journal everything as best as I can.

Outside the Reddi-Mart yesterday around 5 pm spotted a Grey Dodge caravan, later model. Because of the light I couldn't exactly see inside. A brown haired woman sitting there and possibly smiling at me? Unsure as I couldn't see. As I walked away. The Jamie voice suggested that it may have been her. Since I didn't see clearly, I'm not putting too much faith in it. Maybe try waving next time???

Dreams:

Jamie 1

Just a dream of me and her in bed kissing.

Jamie 2

I was at a bar with my brother. It was karaoke or something. I was at a table with some paper writing down songs. Jamie came by me as I left the table, and nervously muttered something, which I couldn't quite make out. But, it seemed directed at me.
I walked away and said, "Yeah!!! What SHE said!!". I went outside for a smoke.

Jamie 3

I was with Jamie and her friends somewhere. Jamie was singing something. She noticed me and changed the lyrics to include my name. I said I have some songs I can sing about her. But she didn't seem to hear that and took off with her friends. I was a little disappointed.

Lucid?

I became lucid randomly in a house. I remembered wanting to find Jamie. I went outside to walk to her dream area but my memory fades

From

(I was watching the paramount+ show "From." Before bed.)

I was in the setting of the show. I was in some barn at night with the brother and sister from the show. I was holding a talisman against the door because I couldn't hang it up for some reason...

What?

I went to visit my distant uncle. I thought he could help me with some. He was sitting in a large chair surrounded by people. He gave me a long speech about how I bought myself a coffee and someone else. He seemed to be guilt tripping me about spending money irresponsibly. He then nodded to someone and indicated that they could give me a heart attack in a dream or something... I left dumbstruck. Give someone a heart attack over buying coffee?

Drywall

I was on a drywall Job with the same uncle. I was leaving the job. I wanted nothing to do with him. He seemed to be apologizing, but I wasn't having it.

Jamie is still hard to find in dreams. Things keep interfering.

Jamie 1

Long dream. But all I remember is taking a bus. I was going to the transfer station to catch a connecting bus. Suddenly instead of a bus, I was in a car... And my mother was driving. She drove right past the bus stop where I was supposed to catch the other bus. I told her to let me off but she wouldn't. I asked again. Still wouldn't let me off. My mother is a recovering schizophrenic so I thought maybe she was off her meds. I started yelling and insisting that she let me off. We were in a school zone now and we were slowing down for children. I started yelling that she stopped her meds. The car stopped. Instead of my mother it was Jamie driving. She looked at me really upset.


Really annoying I keep seeing Jamie as someone else...

Jamie 2

3rd person. I saw Jamie lying in bed. Some spider like creature was on her ceiling.

Woke up and made a comment about it to the voice. Her voice said, " How do you know what I dream about?" I answered that I dreamed it.

Jamie 3

We were in a stadium at some game. We were making out.

Annoying

I was at a house with some people. Someone kept trying to get me to drink beer. I didn't want any. The guy kept insisting, and I kept refusing until I was yelling. That dream shaman guy started yelling at me too.

What

A flash of a dream where Jamie was at an orgy. I saw some stuff....

Maybe that dream shaman guy interfering again?

Wtf

A dream where Jamie was dressing up in some lingerie. But she looked like a man. She was also in a garage talking to someone, asking if I might like the outfit.

Last night

Um

I was with some dark guy in a city. He was showing me to some secret hiding place. We had to walk down a long sidewalk to get the. It was this warehouse place under a bridge.

Once there he pulled down his pants and started pole dancing. 8 was like, " yo look buddy, I think you have the wrong idea about me." And he was like: I guess I read the situation wrong. And I'm like, "I don't know what I did to make you think... How do I get out of here?"

He pointed down a ways and I left.

What's with all the Gay themed dreams? I want my Jamie back dammit.

Semi lucid

I was in an abandoned house. became vaguely lucid. I was watching a bed. I tried to manifest Jamie in it. A shape appeared under the covers. I pulled them off but no one was there. Memory fades after.

Kind of frustrating. Voice at night and mornings is great. She keeps saying it's the best relationship she's ever been in and she doesn't see me in person. I hope that changes someday. It is for me to.

Virtually no dreams for two nights.

Last night:

Jamie 1

A dream Jamie was in picture butte, the town I was living in for a couple years until mid summer of last year. She was checking out the town.

That town has a really good Dutch bakery.
I had a Jamie look a like sighting in that town. I was getting coffee one morning at a gas station. Someone with her look was standing by a sink. Kind of stared at me and smiled. I just ignored it. Outside was a white SUV tho. Looked nice and expensive like a range Rover.


Jamie 2


A dream I found a note from Jamie. It said something about how she keeps running into really attractive people but she is deciding to stay the course with me.

Yeah, I get little crushes here and there too. I'm not an aggressive guy at all so nothing comes of it. I just get bored and it goes away. The few times I've tried to be aggressive, I get so emotionally unstable to the point where I can't sleep.

I hardly ever respond to flirting anyway. I've dealt with so many false flirting from people getting a kick out of shutting me down. Most people aren't worth responding to at all.

I'm so dense anyway. When I was younger in high school. Some girl who already had a boyfriend. Invited me to help her babysit. After the kids went to sleep she cuddled up to me. I thought, "this is nice." And just enjoyed it. After a minute she said I was weird and slept somewhere else... I didn't clue in until years later. The few women I have been physical with had to literally tell me," Okay, you can kiss me now... Put your hand here."

I often wonder if Jamie was trying to prompt me to make a move on her. I'm just dense and didn't pick it up. Can't expect a guy who never was a player to know all the player moves. Her voice sometimes asks why was I ignoring her at certain times. Well I wasn't. If she wasn't talking to me I didn't talk to her. And if I did try to talk her, she would get mad and shut me down. Once in response to her voice asking this I responded, " well, think back. At what times did we have good conversations and things went well, what was the most consistent thing?" And she answered, " When I talked to you."

Woah, why am I ranting?

Annoying

A dream that dream shaman guy that use to live here was visiting me.

I wish the guy would get a clue and stay out.

Hug

I dreamed of seeing Charlotte, my cousin's daughter outside a house. She seemed quiet until I offered her a hug, as an apology for not being able to visit. She readily accepted the hug.

A few fragments from the previous nights. Was talking to the Jamie voice in the middle of the night. Many in the Twin Flame community report hearing their partner's voice in their head. As well as experiencing their presence while going to bed. For me it's like experiencing physical sensations with a phantom body (hugs, kisses etc.). I think her voice wanted confirmation of this. Specifically we both mentioned that we both felt safe during this nightly experience. Also I fall into HH or micro dreams which usually reflect the experience.

Jamie 1

A dream where Jamie was in her house. My vision zoomed out and her house was in a toy box or something.

Jamie 2

We seemed to be getting married in this dream. Jamie confirmed her vows and then it was my turn. I began stumbling my vows and finding it hard to speak. Someone started yelling at me for this.

Jamie 3

Brief sex related dream.

Last night:

Jamie 4

HH during talking to her voice. I was seeing a hallway in n a hospital filled with equipment. I heard Jamie's voice say, "I love it when you kiss me down the hall."

I woke up and asked her voice what she meant. Her voice said, " it was my dream, it made sense at the time."

Jamie 5

Jamie was in a rage or something. Not sure what about. I grabbed her in a hug to calm her down. She struggled and maybe swore at me, but I held on. She stopped and I just let her cry.

I woke up and her voice said, " Thank you for calming me down."

Annoying.

I was working in a strange place as a chef. I was in a bathroom and saw something gross in a toilet... Whoever had left it there, was dying from colon cancer. There was blood all over the floor.
I left and passed by a door leading to a room where someone older men were sitting. One man was dying and bleeding... Maybe the cancer guy.

Went to the kitchen. But didn't know what to make. An older east Indian woman was trying to get with me while I was working. Kept force hugging me after I told her to stop.

Went back to the room with the men saying I was going to quit because of that woman. I came there for work and nothing else.

Jamie seems missing, some nights.

Haunted

I was with 2 blond women (Asuka and Jamie?). We were dared to spend the night at a haunted house. I went in a room by myself, but the haunted vibes were so strong, I felt dizzy. Decided to leave and left. Can't remember what I did. Maybe some errands and went back. The women were still there.

Jamie

I was walking along a dirt road. A horse and driver pulling a wooden trailer passed by. The trailer was filled with random stuff. Jamie was sitting in the trailer. She opened her legs and flashed me her lower goods. "U want this?" She asked grinning.

Yeah sure, she knows where I live. Come snag me one evening nd let's get it over with already.

What?

I'm in bed, but I'm in a glass lab. Doctors or scientists are studying me sleep for some reason? And Jamie is with them.

High

I'm with my brother at some bar or social event. In this dream were in Edmonton. There was 2 big malls or something. I remember going between them a few times and roaming. But we wound up at some restaurant or something. But it was also a friend's house? Some blond lady offered us a drink with psychedelic drugs in it or something. I was like no. She handed me. Glass with one sip in it. It looked orange. She said it was a microdose. I took it without thinking.

I walked outside and was near a park with a hill. A purple bear was climbing a hill. At the top of the hill was a garbage can. A giant tentacle with spikes on it came from the top of the garbage can and grabbed the bear and somehow at it. I turned around end every thing had psychedelic hues. Very colorful people and creatures were walking around that were phasing in and out of existence.

I walked back to where my brother was and told him I am going to go find a place to pass out. I said I keep seeing people that aren't there.

I wonder if the woman was Jamie? She was into psychedelics when we were friends. I would like to re iterate that I will never touch hard drugs or psychedelics ever again. I'm pretty sure I had an unbearable panic disorder because of them. Even weed gives me panic. The odd beer use to relax me, now it gives me chest pains the next day. Last time was so bad I checked myself into emergency.

Jamie 2

I'm not in the dream. I see Jamie by herself in a restaurant or bar. She's closing the store. She finishes and finds some stairs and goes up them and goes through a door. She walks in. My vision zooms out and now she's in her farm house at the top. Is this how she teleports in dreams.

I miss the dreams where we were together a lot. And holding hands.

Jamie 1

Just a flash of sitting with her in a movie theater.

Jamie 2

Just a vague dream of being in her house with her mother or something.


Recall has been really bad these past few days. Just dreaming about random scenarios that I really don't care about.


Threat

I'm in some community hall or something. Some East Indian guy goes up to me in the lobby and touches my chest. He says, "I'm going to kill you." And walks away. I say to other people in the crowded lobby. " Did you hear that?" As if I expect them to do something. They all last me like they don't get involved?

Maybe it's a guy who has a crush on Jamie?

Weird

I was in my old town in BC . I was looking for my girlfriend but she was blond in the dream.

Wound up in some store with two blond women who were trying to sell me stolen blankets or something. They were going to frame me for theft if I didn't pay for them. So I pulled out a knife and cut one the blankets to shreds. Both girls left and the store owner and some staff were questioning me about the thieves. They started talking about cameras in the store. I realized they would see me on camera destroying one of the blankets. So, I left as well.

Okay, still working on not splitting on the past. More actively praying on it. Last thing I wanna do is have Jamie come back into my life, and on a bad day, drag her through the mud of the past. That could be abusive. So, I am working hard on it. We're dealing with years of looking at her one way. This is NOT easy at all. I'm like: la dee da, today at work, but later on - I'm thinking about the past again. Imaging myself in those situations again, and playing out being more stern with her and this and that. Her voice had to tell me to stop it because she apparently senses when I do this. I apologize of course. It's just where my mind goes sometimes, it's really hard to control. But I am actively trying to work on it.

Dreams:

Quickly binge watched "Wanda Vision". I honestly don't care for MCU stuff. It's pretty much what I watch when nothing else is on the streaming services that I like. But, I found this series a lot of fun. Hard to understand without the context of the movies tho.
Dreams seemed related to what I was watching.

Jamie 1

I'm in Wanda Vision. I'm looking down the street. It's black and white like the first two episodes. I look down the street and see Jamie down the street, looking like she in the 50's. She just walks out of a house and looks inside the mailbox. Dream fades.

Jamie 2

In Wanda Vision again. Black and white still. It's raining. I'm trying to help a guy stuck under a manhole or something. Jamie flies down wearing a super hero outfit. Spandex and everything. She says, "Hi, I'm Captain Booty Cheeks, would you like some ASS-istance?" She's grinning as she says this. The shock of this wakes me up.

Girl would have made a killing as a 90's porn director. For real.

Also, Real Jamie reading my sex dream entries of her be like : 👁️👄👁️
Must be really embarASSing for her to read. You, think that's bad, you should hear what her voice does with practically every song that gets stuck in my head. I will never hear REO Speedwagon the same... She did do the Chick-fil-A sauce, stuff in my dreams months ago because it was stuck in my head, Right? Right?

Jamie 3

Longer dream I can't remember much of the beginning. I was walking downtown in some generic city. Wound up at a bar apparently with some karaoke. Someone hands me a microphone but with no music track. I try to sing something but it doesn't sound good. Some Asian girl ( Jamie, but I keep seeing her wrong in dreams for some reason.) sits down on my lap. But more right on where my D is.

I finish.... The song. And we both go by the bar. Jamie is saying something but her voice is so quiet. I lean closer to hear but all I make out is something like, "...real boyfriend.." She must have been having a difficulty in speaking dream, where you are trying to speak but you sense your real jaw which is frozen. Making it hard to speak in your dream. She vanishes, so I leave.

I'm walking back to where I live. I briefly wonder why I didn't bring my car (failed RC). Because walking kind of sucks. The sidewalk goes strange. Some tiles are missing and filled with water. I avoid those. Next is a drop , The only way down is a metal ladder covered in ice... Great. But I somehow make it down. At the bottom is the Asian girl (Jamie) again. I still don't recognize her as Jamie. She taps me on the shoulder and says, " You're my boyfriend, my REAL boyfriend." I'm still not recognizing her as Jamie. I think about saying, or I might have said, " I already have a girlfriend." Still not getting it, but I wake up.

Her voice does say to me out relationship feels real. I have been asking her for this past week to please tell me in a dream the same thing to confirm. I believe she just did.

Jamie 4

I'm in my Bowden house. But it's facing 2A for some reason. I look out the window and see Jamie driving by in a brown SUV. She nervously looks my way quickly and drives away.

Concert

I'm in some football stands at some event. Like waiting for a concert. I notice Weird Al behind me. We start having a conversation. I ask him how his new tour is going? He says great, I hope to see you there. Then he starts making all these strange predictions about me. Like I'm going to meet Sally and learn to be a crochet master or something. I'm thinking if he's trying to be a psychic, he must be terrible at it. I'm not into these things at all. Then I realize He's not being serious at all. He's just joking around, because He's Weird Al..

Funny couple days. Day 1 i was making a supper. For some reason the Jamie voice likes to bug me while I'm trying to cook. " You're doing that wrong... That's too much!!! You cut those too big!" First of all I ask how she would even know what I am doing? She always answers that she can see it in her mind. I always say you're not here to eat it, so let me do it my way.

Also the brake pads on my car are going so I'm not delivery driving until they are fixed. My dad has work for now.

Jamie 1

A quick flash of Jamie standing over a stove, eating out of a pot. Apparently it's supposed to be what I made. She smiles at me while eating it.

Jamie 2

A quick flash of her in a wheelchair. She's rolling towards me. Hm I hope this isn't a real thing.

Next night: nothing.

Yesterday, possible drive by when it was getting dark. I was talking to her voice outside and heard, " I really wanna see you." I heard a car slow down by me house, so I walked to see. It was super dark. A grey car drove by and in the passenger seat I saw a head turn to look at me. But it was so dark and fast I couldn't make the person out. The head turn was like her though.

Like I said, I don't mind if she does this. Just please make sure I can clearly see her. I wanna see her too. It does help validate to me what I'm going through on this blog. So don't be sneaky or disguise herself.

Jamie 3?

I was in a gas station store, that had a McDonald's in it or something. A familiar woman went to the glass door. Her hair was dyed light purple. I thought it was Zoe from when I worked with Jamie, Z worked at the same place. The woman recognized me and she seemed to be holding back tears. Zoe was another "friend." From that time (not as close), who suddenly turned on me when I was going through my dark night of the soul. So I reacted in the dream as if it was Zoe.

She started to say something but I cut her off with. " What, you're suddenly going to talk to me after 13 years? We were good friends and you dropped me without explanation, and I'm supposed to just accept you back?"

The woman took a step back. She said, "I'm going to kill myself." And it sounded like Jamie's voice. And she turned and ran out the door. I was going to follow her and apologize, but I woke up.

Yeah, I guess I'm going to have to be very careful with my words. I'm pretty sure it was Jamie in the dream. Unfortunately, the way I described Zoe also applies to her. I do acknowledge that Jamie at least, tried to explain. Just not very well.

I woke up and realized I had fallen asleep and didn't finish my prayers. I had started and dosed off. The Jamie voice was there , but quiet. We eventually talked about it somewhat and agreed to finish my long list of prayers. I added to not let us be prisoners to the pain of our past. There's a line about love in Corinthians somewhere in the Bible that says something like, "Love keeps no records of wrongdoings." While what I said to Zoe in the dream applies to Jamie, and I do indeed feel that way sometimes. That is a worthy goal to strive for. It's almost humanly impossible to forget. That's why I'm going to rely on Jesus and shut my mouth if Jamie comes to me in person with something to say.

Bull

I was in the lobby of a hotel checking on my business cards. I noticed the display tray was emptied. So I went to get more cards. When I got back there was a menacing bull with big horns in my way. I made sure I wasn't carrying anything red, so that it wouldn't charge at me.

Other small dreams involved something about a McDonald's franchise owner was meeting with a man who owned a bar franchise, or something.... Idk

One dream seemed to involve the lady from Our of the box. Hey, they haven't called me in weeks... I'm to shy to call them now.

Went home early today, started feeling tired but not sick. I can't do consistent 10-14 hour days like I know some ppl do.

Night off I decided to focus on the Jamie voice. If it's really her we had a good time and my dreams reflected that. Last 2 nights no dreams of Jamie.

Jamie 1

Just a flash of slow dancing with her in a bar. The song sounded country... Blech!! But we were enjoying ourselves and started kissing.

Jamie 2

I was in a park with Jamie. I was laying down and she got on me and started dry humping me. Lol. The image of it was funny. What if there's kids around?

I can't remember my other dreams very well. One was in a large building.

I find focusing on Jamie more instead of other things increases the frequency of dreams.

Made a good amount yesterday, so I'm taking a day off. Only problem is I'm not getting as much dreams.

Weird

Was in a strange maze house. Only way to describe is you can't leave the house without solving things in certain rooms. I wanted to exit so I went up a staircase that led to a room. In the room there is a mannequin dancing to no music by itself. False memories of being in this room earlier and doing something with boxes to bring the mannequin to life. I remember touching the mannequin in a sexual way to see what would happen. It turned to me and barred it's teeth like a dog warning you to not go near it's bone while it's gnawing at it. I backed off and the mannequin seemingly smiled and went back to dancing. I had an urge to try and fight it and I grabbed it by the arm. The arm seemed muscular and I got the impression that it was a fleshly being covered in a fake white skin. I decided not to fight it and left the room looking for another way out.

White board

Dreamed I was leaving messages for Jamie - or what I thought was Jamie on a white board outside a house. I left one message like a marriage proposal on it. I saw the girl read it and say to the other girl with her that, there's no way she would ever want to be with me.


Woke up and deliberated with Her voice for a bit. What I got from her voice was the opposite from my dream.

Jamie

I'm in a dream with Jamie and she's confirming to me, yet again that she wants to have a relationship with me in person.

Talking

I was outside of a fancy old fashioned school building talking to some woman about my cousin who died.

Las night: no Jamie dreams. Working delivery even makes her voice faint. There is a way to get rid of the voice. In the past I got so busy in day to day life, and Jamie in hers. That we both kind of forget about it. There were periods like this in past years before this strange, "relationship."

T2

Totally random dream about Terminator 2. I was apparently visiting places where it was filmed. The psych ward parking lot chase was a tourist attraction. But it was a weird dream version. There was a cosplay Terminator there with a fake accent. Me and other people seemed to be enjoying the place...