non-lucid

Another crappy recall night. I wasn't feeling well, so I went to sleep at 9PM and woke at midnight lol. Then I crashed again 6:43AM and woke at noon... but it was too cold to get out of bed so I slept for another hour.
Then I talked to hubby and lost the dreams I had managed to hold on to.
Except one. I dreamed I had a baby girl but I forgot about her for 4 days and she was in the car. I was terrified that she was dead, but when I opened the door, she had the sleepiest, sweetest, happiest smile.
My ex-hubby was the father and I was living with my grams. That's it.

I know I also dreamed of food and clones (thanks to binging Orphan Black) and cats, but I've lost the specifics.

Fitbit info: 6:43AM- 12:01PM (it never gets my wake up right). 5 times restless for total of 1hour 16 minutes. Sleep equivalence of 4 hours 2 minutes.
I kept waking in pain. My shoulder was subluxing as was a hip. My nose stopped up every time I laid down. Perhaps it's time to start considering a real bed. I started sleeping on a desk because it was the only thing that kept my back from hurting. Now my back is starting to hurt all the time but so is everything else lol

I actually took an entire Cyproheptadine last night so I COULD sleep. Hubby didn't want me up early, the kids had nothing for me to do, so I was going to sleep and attempt the ToTM.
I failed miserably lol. I barely recall any dreams at all thanks to my bird squawking me awake and my dog pacing outside my door.
I remember a stress dream about my daughter Destinee. She had a job somewhere but was bugging out early because the place was under repairs. I told her to get permission first and we argued. I then lectured and ranted about responsibility and not blowing the chance.
Food was part of that dream too. I was going through the drive-through but I angled the car wrong. I still got the order (which I don't recall). I worried about not having enough money. Paula added a diet soda and plain tea and I worried about going over budget.

And now I just got off the phone with hubby so my recall has even further deteriorated.
I had my standard zombie and base building dream. The horde was attacking early and I wasn't prepared. I wanted to take a wrench to the AC unit outside before they destroyed it. Lumberjacks came up from the lower floor and almost killed me but I escaped out the window and up a hill. Then a pack of dogs attacked and almost killed me. And just like the video game, I took time to skin them even though the horde was feet away

Okay... my Fitbit info:
I turned on sleeping at 3:17AM. I woke up at 2:32PM I was restless 14 times for a total of 1 hour and 45 minutes so I got the equivalent of 9 1/2 hours worth of sleep.

I decided not to try the task again because I was supposed to wake up at 10AM to take my daughter-in-law to the Dr. I slept through the alarm and didn't get up until 1Pm
I slept rough again. According to my Fitbit, I started sleeping at 3:20AM (that's when I told it I was going to sleep). I was "restless" 10 times for a total of 2 hours and 29 minutes. I only got the equivalence of 7hours and 11 minutes worth of sleep. Which is better than the last couple days of 3 and 4 and a half hours.

ANYHOW.... I only recall snippets of dreams: clones, zombies, base building, fighting with my kids about something. Dreams come back to me at weird times, so if I get anything more later today, I'll add it.

I had a bunch of humdrum dreams last night. I told myself I wasn't even going to attempt the ToTM because I didn't get to sleep until 6AM and I had to be awake by noon. LD disrupts my sleep way too much so I've not even bothered trying for years.

The only dream that stands out from last night was yelling at my husband. We were in a hotel room with an adjoining room that some other family was using. A little kid was being extremely disruptive. He was banging on the walls and floor, screaming, crying etc. Hubby had enough. He stormed into the room and I could hear him whooping the kids butt. When hubby returned, I laid into him saying he assaulted someone's kid and it wasn't his place to lay a hand on the boy no matter how bad the boy was. I was furious.

And then I practically jumped out of bed because I thought it was 5:30PM It was only 1:30. I still slept through my alarm but not by too much

I also had my standard zombie and base buildings dreams (inspired by 7 Days 2 Die which I play wayyy too friggin much).

In one, I found the body of a childhood friend hanged in a room of my parents house. He killed himself because he discovered that the world was going to end violently and painfully one day at 8:00. I spent the rest of that dream investigating what he had learned. It seems "witches" were to wake up within people and they'd emerge hungry. I went into the secret basement I often dream about. But it was a different one than usual. There were gears under the ground in this one. If I stopped the gears, I'd stop the madness. But just as I discovered them, they kicked on, and with it a furnace and the door was sealed behind me. I was trapped to slowly burn or starve to death. I thought my friend had the right idea and wondered how I could myself.

I woke from that dream and had another with a similar theme. I don't remember it as vividly, other than silence descending on the world as I saw a wave of energy roll over the surface of land masses and kill everything in its path. It wasn't violent though. It was almost beautiful. It was a silence.
But then the dream changed and I was in a plane, trying to blow out the back (where the propeller was lol) so I'd be sucked into the sky. Just as I finished disassembling everything, the plane landed and I quickly covered my tracks so I could try again on the way back home.
At some point, 3 dogs were called by the owner (once on the ground somewhere) so I could take them with me. Being sucked out of the plane would somehow save us from something. I told the guy I wouldn't have time to go into the cargo hold to find them, but he said now-a-days he can just buy tickets for them and they could ride beside him (they were large dogs)

At some other point, I wrote a letter to God. It was a group letter from a lot of different people. I don't remember what I wrote.

What a bunch of weird dreams.

If I've not forgotten it all...
I slept from 5AM-noon then went back to sleep from 1:30-5PM. It was the last bit of sleep that resulted in so many awesome dreams.

In one, I was drawing and painting pictures. One of them was of a kid and I used a lot of light golds and browns. The face seemed to move because of my use of shadows.

In another dream, I saw a statue. It was some sort of riddle and as I studied it, the hands holding the sword at his back broke off which revealed a dagger. The assassin then came to life and went into a home. I heard a baby crying and I went inside to plead for the infants life. But I had to open a package holding a hatchet first and it was giving me problems.
There were 3 women in the home with him. He was standing over the baby and I ordered him away. One of the women said that's not how they operate; that the baby was safe. They then went to several women sleeping in the room and killed them. I was supposed to help them kill the family, but I couldn't.
It was a very strange, bloody dream.

In another dream, I was in Puerto Rico. I was going to build a home far above the trees and ocean. It was to be some sort of suspension home with a bamboo roof that trapped rain water to be used inside the home. I was flying in that dream, looking for the perfect spot.

There were so many other dreams, but I've forgotten them. One was like Minecraft, another was my usual god-mode dream (creating empires on a vast map)... ah yes, one was of filling my car with gas at the stick shift lol and worrying I broke my car (which is NOT a stick shift )

I woke because I felt a drop of water fall on my back. Of course, there was no water, however

That's it.

I don't remember all of them (thank goodness) but they were awful.

In one dream, my rabbit, Cuddlebug had crawled into some tube. The tube became tiny and it was somehow pressurized. It could unscrew but I always confuse my left from my right. Instead of loosening it, I tightened it and I felt a pop and my hands became wet with blood. I killed my pet and cried a lot- cursing my stupidity.

In another dream, it was a zombie apocalypse. I was running through the large house I always dream about. My youngest daughter was attacked and I didn't hesitate in killing her. I struck fast, but didn't complete the job. She laid on the ground before me, with a dazed expression on her face. Then she became a size just a little larger than a barbie dolll. I sawed of her head and then my grief consumed me.
Then I worried about how to conceal her body in case the world wasn't ending and the State stopped by.
That dream continued for a long time, but I've forgotten most of the details.
I was on a train at some point, and everyone marveled my stupidity.

That's it.

Oh yeah, but night before last, I dreamed I went back in time. I saw my younger self at the age of about 6. Then it dawned on me I wasn't that person. I was someone else, even though I still resembled her.

but my recall doesn't do them justice. My brain seems... ???... incapable of recalling all the detail of my dreams.

The last one I had was amazing. It spanned what FELT like several generations, but that was only because I relived the story in countless ways in two worlds. The book, Dune (which I'm currently reading) inspired a lot of it.
I was on a desert planet (though not always). I was some random male DC who wanted to propose to his girl. But something always interfered. In the world I was from, it was "normal"- full of life and green. But something always happened to send me to that other barren planet. My girl would be with me. One time, we were walking down a road and were ambushed. I "woke" myself up and was sent to my home world before I could die. But I would have no or very little memory of what happened in the barren world. Every time I was about to propose, I would be sent to the other world. Every time, something bad happened and I nearly died, only to return to my own world with no memory. It was extremely frustrating.
Several times, I was in a Fort of sorts. It was booby-trapped and I was injured in countless ways, only to "wake up" before dying. Some man was pursuing me during most of the dream on the barren world. In the last scene, we were trapped in a room in the Fort. The doors sealed us in. I could see the dart traps and tubes rose from the floor which would release poisonous gasses. But somehow, I lived and the bad guy died. I was able to propose, but we were stuck on the barren world. I knew if I went back to my world, I would forget everything and be doomed to live without her.

Another dream was of the large house I frequently dream about. There were the secret passage tunnels in the floor and this time, I actually used them. I was running from someone and there were others with me. I showed them the tunnels/tubes and sent them through. At one time, I used one myself, but I had to return to the house and the second time I was forced out some other way.
I recall a balcony. I was trapped, so I flew to a nearby rooftop. I laid against the roof, but the bad guy (a young black woman) saw me eventually. She released a dart which went through the building and roof and almost struck me. But I moved at just the right time.
I don't recall how the dream ended.

Early in the evening, I dreamed of driving my van. My oldest son was in the back and someone else (?) was in the front passenger seat. The road was treacherous and I ended up falling off a steep cliff. I realized then, all my kids were in the car with me. I told them all I loved them and that I was sorry. Then, the drivers seat was on the other side and I was directly in front of my oldest son. Our combined weight, made the car tilt to the right and I became terrified of the pain. I screamed that I didn't want the car to land like that. But it did. I marveled that I wasn't in any pain, but it was then that I realized we were all dead.
I woke up.

I also dreamed of being at a movie theater. After the show, I wanted some smokes and food, so hubby and I ordered some. But we had to give our selection to the chef to cook. He said it would be done in an hour and a half and I was greatly annoyed at the delay. He said he was the only person working on Sunday- that they were normally closed. Hubby was surprisingly very patient.
That's all I recall.

I crashed hard last night.
The only dream snippet I recall is of photographing a naked woman. I vaguely recall it being sexual (porno?) but I was focused on her stomach. She was VERY trim and thin and I was jealous.

**Edit**
Oh yeah... I also recall spinning. I don't remember why I was doing it, but I loved it. I moved as smoothly as I would with skates on but it was just my feet.

I've been sleeping like crap for the past week or so. I'm constantly woken up by kids or the heat, so my recall has been royally sucking.

One dream I had that was absolutely awesome was:
I was walking on a street near my house. I saw lightning in the distance... a LOT of lightning. Then, a thin bolt hit the ground in front of me and another hit in front of someone walking near me. I was amazed I wasn't struck or injured by proximity.
I then turned toward my long driveway and I felt strong wind from all sides of me and knew a tornado was heading toward me. THere was a large truck across the street which I ran for. Some almost elderly woman named Ruthie sat down in front of a Stop Sign. I tried to get her to follow me but she said she had had enough and was going home (heaven?). She wouldn't budge from the spot.
Then some guy named David and a little girl ran toward me and joined me underneath the truck. The area was much larger than it would have been in RL. We held on to various parts and rode out the storm safely.
Afterward, I made a sandwich lol.
I cut it into triangles and asked the girl if she wanted some.

That was the only whole dream I recall from this week.

Fragments include same ole same ole themes:
Running through a large house, trying to hide dead bodies, wrecking cars, wrecking the RV, messy house, messy RV, fights with kids, lots of water dreams, dreams of Chewy dying a million different ways in a million different dreams (Chewy was a rabbit who was killed by one of our cats a couple weeks ago).
In a dream from last night, I dreamed of my old cat Rogue and something about snakes. They were odd with spikes running down their sides. A man caught one and snapped off it's head with his thumb.

I dreamed of cooking food... corn on the cob, lasagna, cheesy garlic bread. I was at my grandmothers house. We spoke about what veggies go with what main courses and, for some reason, I had to explain what cheesy garlic bread is.

In another dream, I wrote down 2 names. They both started with "V" and were really cool names, but I don't recall what they were. From those 2 names, I created manuscript outline

In another dream, I was a guy. I was with 2 other people in a very remote location. We had to set up some sort of machine that sort of hovered above a rock and read the terrain for miles. It also located weaknesses in the earths crust and minerals. It was set up in a cave and there was an area we could dig just feet away. A woman hit the area with a shovel and the ground crumbled more than anticipated and put the mission and our lives at jeopardy.

In another dream, I spoke to a teacher of my youngest daughter. It was the last 2 weeks of school and he had to shuffle her schedule around some because he was going to be unavailable during the last week.

I'm completely addicted to Facebook games- namely, Frontierville and Cafe World. I kept waking up on my own when I knew something was ready... so I didn't get the best sleep.

One dream was like a computer game or some sort of cartoon skit. A baby was hanging from a door and I had to dress him in cowboy clothes in order to open up a nursery. Then there was some sock puppet/wind sock that I accidentally took apart. I placed the wrong piece on the end and some man was upset that I killed his Socky. I replaced the right part and he was happy again. Other things happened but I fail to remember them.

In another dream, I was walking down an apartment sidewalk. I heard a dog growling, a baby crying faintly and smacking sounds. I tried to look inside but it was all a blur. The crying and smacking got louder so I pounded on the door and told them the police were there and they had better open up. A 14-16 year old girl was abusing the baby. The grandmother was at her wits end. There was another kid or 2 there. The girl was punishing the baby for something, thinking abuse was the way to do it. I stood in the doorway and explained to them that abuse was NEVER the answer... that they should be ashamed of themselves... if I found out it continues, I really would call the cops... that it was never okay for anyone to treat them that way either. The baby was a boy and he had welts on his butt to the point he looked disfigured. He bent in such a way that he kissed his own boo-boos. Then he went to his grams and cuddled against her. She explained the abuse the children had gone through with their father. I don't remember how it ended... oh yeah, but as I was leaving, they accidentally shut the door and the baby was outside. I picked him up and brought him back inside and joked he was already trying to run away. Then I worried they might take that literally and beat him again.

In another dream, I was in a large house. It was horribly messy and located where my trailer is in RL. There were at least 3 stories. A computer was knocked over during some rough-housing. One of the kids in the house was about 18 years old. He was ready to strangle someone because the computer was his livelihood. I then went to each of the kids and assigned them chores to do PRONTO. On the top floor, I explained to a young boy why the computer was so important... that it was his brothers "way out". The brother heard me and his rage went away and he felt love for the little boy. He sat beside the younger boy and explained, himself, why it was so important to him.
Downstairs, a couple of girls were arguing and they didn't appreciate being given chores at all. But they went to work anyhow.

In another dream, somehow connected to the last one... I was in the RV. Some guy lived in it and was renting it to me. My oldest daughter flooded the toilet, and I yelled at her... asking her what she didn't understand by "Don't use the toilet, it's FULL!" There was hamster bedding all over the floor and I yelled for one of my other kids to vacuum it up. Then I saw 2 rabbits hopping everywhere. I was ready to pull out my hair. I told my daughters to give them back to their friend, that we didn't have a cage for them... but they cried and said they were Iccabahs babies and they found them. (Iccabah is a cat lol).
Oh yeah.. at the beginning of the dream, the old man was arguing with a cop. The cop insisted he had parked in the middle of the road. Though the car was no longer there, the officer was giving him a stern warning. The old man said it couldn't be proved and that the officer was a liar. He then went on to say something I've forgotten, but it was basically a tit for tat thing (the old man made up something against the officer and told him to prove it was untrue). When the cop left, I called the old man an asshole under my breath. My feelings softened for him, though, as the dream progressed.

In another dream, I kept going to Sheetz to fill up my 52 oz cup but I would leave having forgotten to do so. I would drive back and do it all over again.

I dreamed something about food... icecream and other stuff.

I dreamed someone asked how big my family was and I said I came from a family of 11 (it was really 7), though we weren't raised together. The person knew my bio-dad and said something strange about my brother Eric rising from the grave a couple times a year (in RL he died in an ATV accident). Then I saw the man was a Pentacostal Preacher and I felt compelled to listen to him out of politeness. Then he wrapped me in some sort of cloth and dispelled demons and told me to pray. I don't recall what I asked. Then he slipped some trinket into my hand and when he removed the cloth, I was supposed to slide the trinket into a candle slot. It was star shaped and I couldn't get the object inside. The Preacher ended up doing it for me. Don't recall how it ended.

In another dream (one of the first of the evening), all I recall is a woman snobbishly smiling at my buzz cut.

In one of the last dream tidbits, my hair was growing back quickly but unevenly. I had a lot of long wisps.

That's it.

I don't recall much about my dreams last night.
A couple things that stand out:
I heard a woman being raped. In the dream, I knew her. I couldn't access the room so I banged on the wall, yelling at the man. The woman quietly told me to leave them alone, that it was concentual. I knew he was making her say that, but I couldn't do anything. I felt utterly helpless.

In another dream, I was running through a building with many rooms. This is a recurring theme. A very large (both tall and fat) man opened the door and taunted me. "Is she in here? (it was a very small bathroom and I was hiding behind the opened door)" He asked. Then "Should I run along now and keep searching or" then he stepped into the room to look behind the door. I hit him as hard as I could then kept running. Don't recall how it ended.

In another dream I was some other woman. I had been kidnapped and taken........ no, the dream started in a car. I was with a guy who had abducted me. He gave me a red wig to wear but it fit me poorly. We were in a nightclub and I heard someone talk about a guy who was missing. In the dream, he was a friend. I told my abductor that I wanted to look for him. I thought I knew where he was. But that made the man very mad. He called the friend my lover and said I wouldn't see him again.
When we left, the dream continued in 3rd person and I saw the news. There was a picture of me and there was an announcement about my abduction.
Then I was by the sea, on a cliff with caves. There were several people, but they were all clones (3 different sets). Some were bad guys, others good. I tried running, but got caught. The man then gave me a syringe. I don't remember why I HAD to stick under my eye. I think the life of someone else was at stake. Anyhow.. he gave me a syringe and explained what would happen. I stuck it through my lower eye lid and into my eyeball. The sollution dissolved my eye. It looked REALLY gross and I was surprised there was no pain. Then I had to do the other eye. The colors I saw as my eyes liquified were amazing.
There was a huge fight
There was a battle and I fought though blind. Don't recall how it ended.

In another dream, I was on a spaceship. We were lost for a really long time, but we ended up finding a Planet of the gods or some such. When we landed a car drove us through a neighborhood. One home had a plate which read : "The Last of the Jetsons" lol.
Our finding the planet was crucial for earth. Don't recall why.
Then the dream was narrated my a girl who was supposed to be my daughter or granddaughter. She spoke of moving into the last house on Jackson.

In another dream, I was in a car with a former Elder of my Congregation. He spoke to me about quitting smoking and getting back into the Congregation. That's all I recall.

In another dream, I was a guy... I remember nothing else though.

That's it for today.