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    Non-Lucid Dreams

    1. The Aquarium of Odd Lifeforms

      by , Yesterday at 10:23 AM
      Morning of January 21, 2018. Sunday.



      This type of aquarium-based dream was more common when I was a teenager. (An aquarium typically represents the nature of the dream state itself as relative to the dream self’s faux mind and its transition back into consciousness.)

      My dream begins in the southwest bedroom of the Cubitis house. I am sitting on the bed (which is aligned east to west near the south windows) and facing the doorway. Also on the bed is a large but shallow rectangular aquarium. A smaller end is closest to the doorway. I had been watching the water getting higher until it is about half the depth of the aquarium.

      There are a number of unusual small creatures in the aquarium, the largest being a multicolored flatworm of about four inches long, which I view as intriguing.

      Marilyn (an older half-sister on my mother’s side) eventually comes into the room. I tell her about the flatworm as she looks at it.

      There are some very unlikely living creatures as well, including oversized diatoms, one which looks like a tiny rocking chair (of less than an inch high) with a cape attached to the back. The cape has a floral pattern. Another is a heraldic shield (escutcheon) with wings, also less than an inch high. The “rocking chair” swims with its “cape”, the “shield” with its “wings”.

      Eventually, there are a couple larger creatures, though I soon notice the water lowering. I also somehow pour out some of the water and suddenly, all the creatures simultaneously turn into small transparent ovals, as if the sudden lack of water caused them to cease to exist in their normal form as well as all die at the same time. This surprises me.

      Later, I have my aquarium outside in an unknown location. It is implied to be our backyard, though the house does not look familiar. There are no fences, though there is a sequence of several backyards in front of me and behind me. There is a dense forest off to my left. Zsuzsanna is present. A few other people are also around, but I am not focused on who they might be. Two small creatures (“rocking chair” and “shield”) are similar to how they originally appeared, as I had put more water into my aquarium again, which caused some of them to come back to life, more in the manner of a fast-growing seed. There are also now a couple of miniature mammals. One is a tiny bear (not a bear cub but a miniature adult bear). I am somewhat wary about it eventually growing much bigger. I recall that Zsuzsanna and I had recently watched a movie about a black bear posing a threat to a suburban neighborhood.

      I pick up the miniature bear, taking it out of my aquarium and placing it on the ground to my left, thinking that it may run off into the forest, which is what I would like it to do. It is now about the size of a cat. Instead, it runs off to my right, closer to the back of our house, which Zsuzsanna and I are somewhat concerned about (though there is no implied threat).



      Current conscious self threads with literal context: My dream self (personified subconscious) recalls that I am married to Zsuzsanna and that we have children, but I have no recall of where we live in reality (my most common dream state memory anomaly). My dream renders a fictional setting (though ambiguously combined with a real setting from my youth) that my dream self accepts as legitimate (a main factor of the dream state). The flatworm was influenced by our youngest son’s toy sticky slug that he had shown me a day ago, though it differs from my dream in that the toy is solely gray. Although the miniature bear in my dream’s final scene is of a literal thread of recent memory (in addition to the childhood association described below), relating to a movie Zsuzsanna and I had watched the night before, my memory is incorrect in that the movie, “Unnatural” (2016), featured a huge polar bear (with altered DNA) in Alaska and only as a threat to a few people in one lodge in an isolated region, not a black bear in a forest’s warm climate near a residential neighborhood as my dream self incorrectly recalled. (However, we had also seen a movie a couple days ago with a scene of a grizzly bear attacking a man, though this was also in a cold region; “The Revenant” from 2015.)

      Older conscious self threads with literal context: The miniature bear (before growing somewhat) was originally of an identical size as a mother bear in a model kit, “Black Bear and Cubs”, that my older sister Carol sent me for Christmas in 1972 (though one of many kits she sent me in the same package) while I was living in Cubitis. Marilyn seemed as she did in the 1970s. My attempting to recall whether or not she was still alive (she died on February 13, 2014), even though she was perceived as alive and in the room with me, is a type of memory ambiguity common to the dream state though of which could not occur in wakeful consciousness and is proof that I am aware, though on a subliminal level, that I am dreaming. (Subliminal lucidity is far more common for me than what is claimed by society as non-lucidity.)

      Literal induction thread: The bed at the beginning is both an induction factor and a dream state indicator. It is a subliminal thread of memory recognizing that I had gone to sleep (unrelated to the myth of “interpretation”).

      Metaphorical induction thread: The literal bed dream state indicator, as an induction factor, is combined with my most common metaphorical dream state induction symbolism, water rising. Water and water rising symbolizes sleep and entering deeper into the dream state.

      There is very slight vestibular system symbolism here. This would be the two smaller creatures, where one has a cape and the other, wings. Additionally, it reflects the nature of RAS mediation, the shield as a factor of “shielding” myself from RAS and the other, in contrast (the rocking chair), just being passive while “watching” my dream. A rocking chair also has a link to vestibular system symbolism, as it rocks back and forth. Additionally, a cape is a dream state indicator as it typically relates to an association with bed sheets.

      Although the common water lowering waking symbolism occurs, I (subliminally) reinduce my dream for a short time, though which soon triggers a RAS mediation factor (the bear) in the final scene. However, the bear does not grow very large or become a threat, and I do not run from it. It moves from my left to my right (common waking orientation symbolism), going towards our backyard, symbolizing my inevitable return to consciousness.


    2. Known Key Symbolism 2018: Dream State Indicators

      by , 01-09-2018 at 07:05 PM
      Afternoon of January 9, 2018. Tuesday.



      In my previous entry, “Known Key Symbolism 2018: Common Liminal Space Settings (1)”, I explained how a porch, a parking lot, and a store checkout are known forms of dream state symbolism that typically mark the last segment of my dreams during the waking process (and of which have featured in thousands of my dreams as such since childhood). As also stated, there are many more, though typically that which symbolizes liminal space in the dream state is that which symbolizes liminal space in reality (just as that which represents a liminal space divider in a dream is that which symbolizes a liminal space division in reality, for example, a fence, a wall, a presumably closed window or door, or even a ceiling if one becomes focused on it, even the contrast of ground and sky in some dreams). This entry relates to another common factor of my dreams, what I now mainly refer to as dream state indicators (referred to as dream signs in most older entries, though others use that term in a slightly different way).

      In the hour or so leading up to going to bed and going to sleep, what do people do? Many people take their shoes off. They probably get undressed. They are eventually typically in bed, sleeping, often in a dark room.

      So why are people puzzled when they are not wearing shoes (or cannot find their shoes) when in the dream state? Why are they puzzled about being undressed, including being undressed in public? If the physical body is undressed, why would someone be surprised about not being fully dressed while in the dream state regardless of the dream’s setting?

      In this entry, I will mostly only write of first-level dream state indicators without getting into the more complicated factors. Some of the more obvious dream state indicators (for me) are:

      Not wearing shoes or being undressed in public (of which I am typically not only unconcerned about, but which I often initiate deliberately in lucid dreams, including in public places, since I recognize it is just the dream state - and to indulge in additional levels of sensual connections to Zsuzsanna in this “other state”, which of course is literal and literally willed in such a case)

      A bed, including a bed in an unusual location (especially in a known liminal space setting)

      Appearances of pillows, bed sheets, and bedroom features

      Features that exist in our bedroom in real life, including features that are not inherently associated with a bedroom for other people

      Seeing someone else (or even an animal) sleeping (though note that dreaming I am sleeping, regardless of the setting, while actually feeling tired, means just that - that my physical body is overtired in real life - this not being in cases where I happen to be in bed or otherwise “sleeping” in the dream state without that augmented sense of tiredness)

      This last indicator is so common, I came to typify it (around the age of eight) as “The Sleeper”. (Still, there are cases where The Sleeper is linked to a prescient thread, as when our oldest son got very ill on September 26, 2017, or with my detailed dream that came just prior to our roof being torn off by the storm a couple months back, even including the large tarpaulins being put over our house and the unusual appearance of this sudden and totally unexpected storm.) In some cases (such as “The Dead One” from February 13, 1971), The Sleeper is perceived as a corpse (though in that dream, Brenda came back to life but coalesced into the unconscious space, which is different than waking space coalescence that involves the dream self coalescing back into the conscious self identity).

      Dream state indicators can also be related to false awakenings, for example, writing down a previous dream in a dream journal (in a dream) or talking about it with someone else. In some dreams, I have actually, as my dream self, relayed the meaning of a dream without realizing I was in the dream state at the time. False awakenings of this nature are so common that I often do not even document them unless there are unusual or interesting variations. (They occur in a different level of unconsciousness anyway, so are typically not related to the dream that they followed other than writing it down or talking to another dream character about it in the offset dream.)

      It should be clear that the nature of liminal space settings of the waking process is completely different from the nature of dream state indicators (though sometimes dream state indicators are rendered in liminal space, which I will explain in another entry). Liminal space settings (and their inherent symbolism) are typically a result of the waking process, whereas dream state indicators are subliminal remnants of having fallen asleep. Thus, on one level, they are opposite factors though which typically occur during the same waking transition.


      Categories
      non-lucid
    3. Missed Concert, Bathroom Wake-up Call (TS)

      by , 01-05-2018 at 08:35 PM
      Morning of January 5, 2018. Friday.



      The time is perceived, by looking at an analogue clock, as about 10:30 at night. Apparently, there is going to be a concert that Zsuzsanna and I will be going to (as well as at least our youngest son, as I see him in the room). We are in the bedroom of our present home. However, the room is different. Our bed is oriented correctly, but there is a toilet just beyond the foot of the bed, facing it (on the right side, and I sleep on the right side of the bed in reality) and at the southeast corner of the room. I do not consider this as unusual.

      It seems that it may be a Three Dog Night concert, though this is anachronistic (though my dream self does not consider it as wrong). I see their photograph in a newspaper I am reading and they mainly seem in their early thirties. Curiously, I am aware that I can download a song, though the technology is somehow embedded in the newspaper. I see a metallic image of an MP3 player on the page, with equidistant vertical graduation lines regarding the length of the recording. Under the right side of it is a downwards arrow that implies opening up a context menu or clicking it to download it. (I do not really consider how ridiculous a concept this is, as one cannot click on a newspaper page as on a computer monitor.)

      I have to use the toilet, but then I realize that if I did, we would be late. The concert apparently starts at about 10:45, which I see is only about three minutes away. I decide that we will have to miss going to the concert. I wake up anyway, as I need to use the bathroom in reality.



      I have added “technology ambiguously mixed with paper and printed text” as a tracking phrase, as this has occurred in my dreams a number of times. It may seem odd, but is actually dual symbolism with both aspects as for the emergent consciousness factor.



      2018 Tracking System: DATA, bedroom as first-level dream state indicator 2, Zsuzsanna 1, reading as emergent consciousness factor 2, reading in the dream state 2, clock as circadian rhythms symbol 2, first-level bathroom wake-up call 1, technology ambiguously mixed with paper and printed text 1, right-oriented waking symbolism 3


    4. Reading a Worm, “Loam” and “Vex” (TS)

      by , 01-05-2018 at 07:23 PM
      Morning of June 19, 1976. Saturday.



      I am in the southwest bedroom of the Cubitis house where my father is present. We are in the southeast area of the room, near the doorway. I am facing the south windows as he is sitting on a chair facing me. He has taken a very rare species of (assumed as fictional) phosphorescent earthworm and is holding it by one end, saying that it has the ability to communicate with people. After a few minutes, the worm curls to form actual vertical handwriting with its entire body, first spelling the word “loam”, then the word “vex”. This is all that it does before my dream fades. (I consider that it is a glow worm, as one of the many songs my father sang publicly was called “Glow Worm”, though that is not actually what it is.) I sense that the worm is annoyed by people trying to get messages from it, when it probably wants to sleep.

      The earthworm is a real-time dream state symbol. Attempting to read it as it is spelling words is the emergent consciousness factor, as thinking skills for sustained reading are only viable when conscious. As such, it seems that a part of me does not want to get up for the day yet. Additionally, trying to get feasible “messages” from the unconscious is sometimes futile, as it is just that…unconscious. (I suspect that this dream may have also been influenced by the “Sesame Street” short “Mary Sunshine”, though related to counting, with the lyric, “I head eleven worms yawning”.)



      2018 Tracking System: DATA, bedroom as first-level dream state indicator 1, father 1, earthworm as (unconscious state) sleep cycle symbol 1, reading as emergent consciousness factor 1, reading in the dream state 1


      Categories
      non-lucid
    5. Tina Saved from Walking the Plank (TS)

      by , 01-05-2018 at 05:44 PM
      Morning of May 23, 1968. Thursday.



      My dream involves a scene like the one from “Peter Pan”. A schoolmate, Tina, is the one walking the plank on a pirate ship. I think the “pirate” making her do this is implied to be a teacher, though he is unknown to me, though he stays mostly in the background. However, when she falls (is pushed or pressed by the tip of a large sword) she never hits the water. In my dream, this seems a very mysterious and interesting concept. She had been caught and carried off to safety by a magical force, with me somehow being responsible even though my direct (corporeal) presence is not in this scenario.

      Later, I fly around above my town (on my own) mostly in the dark, over various boats and buildings, including my school.



      My rescuing of Tina from falling into the water seems more about negating my own potential dream state reinduction and entering a lighter sleep as a result, yet it also transmuted the vestibular system factor and as a result, rather than the typical falling start, I entered a state of sustained flight and its control.



      2018 Tracking System: DATA, water induction and water as symbolizing sleep 3, boat as sleep cycle symbol 1, return flight waking symbolism 1, rescuing someone 1, rescuing Tina 1, flight as vestibular system symbolism 1, transmuted preconscious (to a passive character) 1, transmuted vestibular system dynamic 1, plank as liminal space divider 1, negated reinduction 1, movie influence 1, Peter Pan influence 1, teacher as villain 1, controlled flight 1


      Updated 01-05-2018 at 05:49 PM by 1390

      Categories
      non-lucid
    6. The Electric Imp (TS)

      by , 01-05-2018 at 02:16 PM
      Morning of September 5, 1982. Sunday.



      There is some sort of creature or imp that lives in a cupboard under the kitchen sink at my brother Earl’s house in Florida (though he had not lived there for several years in reality), though which later seems to be in Wisconsin at a motel. My dream and the offset sequence seems to take place in late morning.

      The creature, which is apparently made of electricity, projects small bolts of lightning up through the drain somehow (as if the pipe is not there and the creature is directly under where the water would flow). However, I am never directly threatened by the imp and the lightning seems mostly inconsequential. I visualize the imp as probably only being about a foot tall.

      At one point, he sounds like a human talking, but with a sort of hollow or metallic sound. It seems that Earl will be unlikely to live in the apartment anymore until the “electric imp” is gone. I do not see this imp at any point, only the smaller patterns of lightning coming out of the drain now and then. Although the imp may be talking to me (though I do not focus on what it is saying), I do not speak at any point in this dream or the following offset segment.



      In an offset dream, though still part of the same sequence (without waking), I find myself in an unknown parking lot (though is possibly near Shopko on the north side of La Crosse). I see Earl sitting in the back seat of an unknown car, on the right-hand side. His face seems distorted, without the potential for it to be a real human face (which my dream self finds inconsequentially puzzling). Still, he reminds me of a handicapped male in a television commercial from years ago, who said, “I’m a little tired. I’m alright though,” when emerging from the water of a large indoor swimming pool.



      The last scene is a transmuted water lowering waking symbol (subliminally associated with someone emerging from water as analogous to leaving the dream state), even though the electric imp was already a factor of water lowering waking symbolism. A parking lot is also a common waking space symbol for me, though typically the second-from-last dream of the sleeping period (as this was) while a porch is typically the final waking symbolism setting of a sleeping period.



      2018 Tracking System: DATA, water induction and water as symbolizing sleep 2, kitchen as subliminal hunger symbol 1, right-oriented waking symbolism 2, brother Earl 1, lightning as RAS to emergent consciousness precursor 1, soft awakening 2, parking lot as waking space symbol 1, drain as liminal space divider 1, subliminal rendering of waking prompt 1, water lowering waking symbolism 1, motel as liminal space transition precursor 1, impossible face 1


    7. The Tower Big Ben (TS)

      by , 01-05-2018 at 12:15 PM
      Morning of December 20, 2010. Monday.



      Feeling relaxed, as I step through green grass of about knee length (apparently being barefoot and wearing shorts as I can feel the velvety grass against my legs and feet), into an area closer to the shore of a pristine lake, I feel very peaceful. There is no one else present. It seems to be late morning or afternoon.

      Eventually, evening seems to be approaching. I am not surprised (at least at first) when I turn my head to my right and see the tower Big Ben. I even consider that it may be a feature of the building I live in (though without a thread of memory of what country I live in). However, I do start to become puzzled by the nature of time and how it seemed to be afternoon only a short time ago. Still, I do not have any negative thoughts or worries. I continue to sit by the shore of the lake, feeling content.



      My dream self does not seem aware of it being my 50th birthday. The clock tower as an emergent consciousness symbol is rendered via circadian rhythms factors (and the later stages of the sleep cycle) but additionally in this case, may also represent mortality. It is also qualified as being this dream’s waking space prompt and is additionally associated with the puzzle of being between dreaming and waking. This is because my older sister Marilyn often bought Milton Bradley Big Ben jigsaw puzzles. The lake symbolizes being in a specific stage of the sleep cycle, while the clock mainly represents the waking precursor.



      2018 Tracking System: DATA, water induction and water as symbolizing sleep 1, tower as emergent consciousness symbol 1, liminal space symbolized as puzzling 1, clock as circadian rhythms symbol 1, clock as mortality symbol 1, soft awakening 1, no dominant RAS symbol 1, tall grass as liminal space divider 1, right-oriented waking symbolism 1, outside setting 1, solitary 1, lake as mid-range sleep depth 1, peace and contentment 1


      Tags: clock, lake, time, tower
      Categories
      non-lucid
    8. A Nimbin Man with Balloons

      by , 01-03-2018 at 12:04 PM
      Morning of January 3, 2018. Wednesday.



      My dream begins in an undefined setting. I do not possess any conscious self threads other than a vague association with Nimbin and Tuntable Falls (which I had written about in a recent entry). I am outside, though there are ambiguous shifts where I am also inside at the same time at certain points.

      An unfamiliar male of about thirty is present. Apparently, the police are following him, believing him to be carrying drugs. He has a large backpack and some sort of oversized balloon. Eventually, the balloon grows larger and proves to be that of a dinosaur, a tyrannosaurus (though there is no implied threat as it is just a balloon).

      Until the last segment, I am not implied to be a direct part of the scenario. However, I am curiously linked to the dynamics of the balloon. When it expands and grows taller, it seems my dream self is also growing larger and taller, though not implied to be seen by the other dream characters.

      Somehow, another balloon is present and expands. I believe it is meant to be a rabbit, though there is not that much focus on it.

      A third balloon begins to fill with air and grow large and tall, but this time it is a reindeer, somewhat anthropomorphic. Again, I am linked to the balloon, feeling myself growing larger and even hitting my head on the ceiling (though it is not painful) as I watch the reindeer’s head bump the ceiling to my left, even though we are also implied to be outside.

      From here, I am annoyed by the presence of RAS (the police) via the preconscious. What started out as the usual return flight waking symbolism (as a flying reindeer is a flight symbol, which truncated the rabbit symbolism of which symbolizes being deeper in sleep) to vestibular system symbolism, triggers an odd level of semi-lucidity to where I am ready to shoot everyone (which symbolizes real-time RAS mediation of the dream state). Bumping my head on the ceiling means a part of my mind is holding me in the dream state, though as I am only semi-lucid, I am unsure of my waking space status and physical orientation. Still, I shoot about six officers in the forehead. They are ducking behind some cover (some sort of flat vertical structure), but I get them one at a time in my semi-lucid waking space. (As I have written in past entries, the association with the man possibly carrying illicit drugs is a dream state potential reinduction factor, as they relate to altering the level of consciousness or unconsciousness.)


      Categories
      non-lucid
    9. Floating

      by , 01-02-2018 at 12:47 PM
      Morning of December 28, 2017. Thursday.



      I stand before a brick wall with variegated brick colors. The glowing word “FLOATING” (in uppercase, with white letters) appears hovering in the air a couple inches in front of the wall at about face level. That is, each letter of the word itself is floating in the air (and has a neon essence) and I consider that is what the meaning of this feature is (as if associated with a “Sesame Street” short). I am non-lucid, so I fail to recognize the usual vestibular system symbolism, which directly symbolizes being in the dream state. The wall symbolizes the division between the non-lucid fictional dream self identity and the conscious self identity in waking life, though also metaphorically serves as the division between lucidity and non-lucidity while in the dream state.


      Categories
      non-lucid
    10. Dry Sleet

      by , 12-30-2017 at 06:30 PM
      Morning of December 30, 2017. Saturday.



      My dream is set in a mostly undefined location. It is already a factor of the waking space (waking transition symbolism). Zsuzsanna and I are sleeping on the floor on a blanket, with no mattress. Although the setting is undefined, there is some essence of the kitchen of our present home, except it seems much larger. As such, we are oriented with our heads to the east when sleeping. It seems to be morning, though there is minimal light.

      Curiously, a handicapped young male (of whom we do not know in real life but have seen in the past), is also present on a blanket on the floor to the north. I do not see him as an intruder or even as being imposing.

      The setting also has the common ambiguity of bilocation, the sense of being indoors and outdoors at the same time (a result of being in sustained non-lucid waking space), though my focus is more on being in our home. Still, sleet begins to fall. It is small ice pellets, though they are not hitting any of us directly, just falling about onto the blankets. The other male seems somewhat cheerful as I pick up some of the ice pellets. He does not get up from his blanket.

      I perceive that the sleet is somehow dry, which puzzles me. I inform Zsuzsanna of this. How could sleet be dry? I know it is made of water (or is supposed to be), yet I also perceive that no water (frozen or otherwise) is present in the ice.



      This is water lowering waking symbolism (though second-level), which has occurred on a regular basis (in one form or another) since childhood. The most likely biological explanation behind this is an association with needing to drink fluids after waking (which is also what desert settings typically indicate). The essence of water is my most common dream state induction factor (and its lowering or lack of presence symbolizes waking from the dream state). Water symbolizes the biological dynamics of sleep in real time. The human body is made of about sixty percent water. (I tend to hear the sound of water flowing when entering a more relaxing sleep, and if my sleep is disturbed briefly or the level of my unconsciousness shifts, I will hear sounds that resemble stones breaking the surface of a pond, at slightly different pitches, which brings me closer to consciousness during the induction state. However, still ponds and small lakes are more on the outer levels of unconsciousness and the dream state. Wider rivers, floods and higher waves, and the ocean, tend to be rendered when I am deeper in sleep and more relaxed - this being the opposite of typical claims by so-called dream interpreters, and in fact, the sound of the raging ocean is used on commercial relaxation tapes to induce sleep.)

      I find this dream curious in how there is a subliminal waking space symbol here. The handicapped male is someone we have only seen once in the last several years, and only just recently. We saw him at the shopping mall as we were sitting on a bench that faces the large parking lot. He was off to our left, the same orientation in viewpoint as in my dream when I was standing and facing east. Without intending to sound mean, his mentally disabled status also symbolizes the lack of critical thinking skills when unconscious.

      My association with the parking lot as a liminal space factor (both in real life and the dream state) rendered him in my dream as a liminal space “remnant” (rather than being a RAS component or preconscious dynamic), though in the waking space where only blankets (as dream state indicators) were rendered. I find that intriguing, and it only serves to validate what I already know.

      The rest is based on associations of when our roof was torn off and it rained inside our house in November. We then slept on the floor in the front room (where part of the roof still covered it) for a time. The kitchen association almost always relates to light hunger in sleep. I suppose there is a bit of wishful thinking here in this particular case as well. We want to stay dry in our house when it rains. Our new roof seems to be okay thus far.


      Updated 01-02-2018 at 12:48 PM by 1390

      Tags: dry, kitchen, sleet
      Categories
      non-lucid
    11. Dream Meanings in Full: Flipping Over a Strange Pill

      by , 12-30-2017 at 09:30 AM
      Morning of June 12, 1976. Saturday.



      At the beginning of my dream, I find myself walking north on a known back road between Arcadia and my home in Cubitis. It seems I am returning home from somewhere, possibly school, although it is the weekend in reality. (My dream self often does not know what year it is let alone the day, though walking home here symbolizes my imminent return to consciousness). It is possibly late morning or early afternoon. The weeds on each side of the road are higher and denser than in reality. The road seems older or less-maintained (which may be an indicator of the presence of prescient threads, of which there are two known of in this dream). I am walking on the right side of the road, close to the roadside.

      Stepping out from the roadside and from my right is a hippie (at least two years older than me, possibly about seventeen) with long blond hair. He is apparently selling GRIT newspapers. He seems like an unlikely older hippie version of my otherwise soft-spoken friend Johnny C—-y, but the hair color is wrong. He is otherwise unknown.

      Even though he is selling GRIT newspapers, he also seems to be selling illicit drugs (a very rare dream scenario). He offers me a free sample pill called “Snakeskin” (which I first also but only vaguely consider is a reference to American dollar bills, followed by vaguely considering if the pill is actually made of skin from a snake), which is a large green oval tablet. For some reason, I take it (which is something I never would have done in real life).

      As I continue to walk along, I have a strange feeling of being pulled into the air and thrown to the opposite side of the road, which causes me to wake with an unusual but vague sense of motion sickness, though it is very brief.



      Familiar dream state components and meanings:

      RAS symbolism: A snake often serves as the main trigger of RAS and is likely the oldest biologically (and probably serves as such in the dreams of all primates, including lemurs, lorises, monkeys, apes, and man). Here however, the association is with its skin, for the subliminal realization of the shedding of it as releasing the fictional dream self to return to the conscious self identity. The pill, as an emergent consciousness precursor (in contrast to the alternate choice of reading the newspaper), symbolizes the shift in consciousness that occurs with waking. My dream self however, seems to subliminally perceive it as reinduction potential (though just as in waking life, some pills are known to bring one closer to unconsciousness, while this dream ultimately utilizes the opposite inference regardless of how my dream self views it).

      Vestibular system symbolism: The rising upwards and flipping backwards to the other side of the road is the resolving of ambiguous vestibular system dynamics in rising from unconsciousness. This is the same waking symbolism as in dreams such as “The Pole Vault Event” from 1970, though in that one, the dynamics were transmuted to another dream character.

      Premonitory hypnopompic precursor: My entire dream seems based on potential control (though based on passive choice in this case) of the waking transition and the nature of RAS. This is because I had continuously been working with dreams in this way since I was around eight years old (to induce apex lucidity). However, prescience always has curious potential despite the dream type or its core symbolism and inherent meaning. In fact, prescience seems far more likely to stem from known core symbolism, which has always puzzled me.

      Personified preconscious: Newspaper boy. The personified preconscious is rendered for waking mediation of a softer transition than “raw” RAS, though often with conflict if there is real environmental noise (and a need to wake and identity it) or biological need (for example, a need to use the bathroom, drink water, or change sleeping position).

      Emergent consciousness factor: The newspapers and the pill, relative to apparent choice. The role of the preconscious here is in making me aware of thinking skills (reading) that are only viable when conscious. Additionally, it introduces the choice of exiting my dream with vestibular system consolidation (the pill), of which I subliminally associate with flight and thus prefer in this case over the softer choice (though which sometimes becomes abstract and annoying since printed text is difficult to understand or stabilize in many states of unconsciousness).

      Prescient threads: A boy (unknown to me) selling GRIT approached my mother after this dream. She purchased the newspaper for about a year and a half prior to our move back to Wisconsin. Additionally, I needed to take both penicillin pills and painkillers after the surgery on my right thumb about two months after this dream. (I had never taken pills on any regular basis before.) The prescient nature of the latter seems to be validated by the preconscious in this case having similarities (in appearance only) to my real-life friend Johnny. Although the pills in this dream are presumably illicit, Johnny had told me a few times in real life that he wanted to be a doctor after finishing high school.

      Real-life influence seems to have come from a GRIT advertisement, though with altered associations.

      Additional notes: In this dream, the original vague association of “Snakeskin” being a reference to money was probably based on the altered association with the GRIT advertisement. The waking symbolism is oriented to my right as is most often the case. The preconscious is rendered to my right as the newspaper boy, who steps out from the weeds from my right. This seems mainly due to sleeping on my left side (as real environmental factors are more intrusive upon my right side, which is more exposed to the real environment I am sleeping in, and its ambiance - whereas unconscious factors, even when personified, are typically oriented on my left). In contrast, flying and being suddenly aware of the left side of my body (on the left side of the road) is the final waking dynamic, as it correlates exactly with my real physical orientation and sleeping position.


    12. The Roof Factor

      by , 12-24-2017 at 06:01 PM
      Morning of December 20, 2017. Wednesday.



      In my dream, curiously enough, I am writing a booklet about a specific factor of my dreaming history (which has remained consistent since earliest memory) called “The Roof Factor”. I am not lucid. However, I had actually considered writing a large entry based on the concept I go into more detail about within my dream.

      Because I have continuously studied and validated the meanings of my dreams since before I could even write (with help from an older brother’s reel to reel recorder), I have learnt a great deal, most of it invalidating almost everything I have ever read about dreams.

      There have been many breakthroughs (even miracles, such as learning my “dream girl”, appearing in detail in my dreams since early childhood, was a real person, of whom I married) regarding the nature of my dreams throughout my life, of which I am extraordinarily grateful. In this dream, the focus is on a very clear realization regarding dreams with the specific focus on open ceilings and sometimes implied roof repair.

      Even before I was nine years old, I had already realized that dream symbolism was more about the specific level of unconsciousness than having any “interpretation” relating to waking life (although literal prescience certainly relates to waking life but is unrelated to the concept of “interpretation” in the popular use of the term). As such, I had noticed that dreams with open ceilings featured are far more likely to occur within a specific level of awareness (even during a certain time of the sleeping period) where my conscious self identity is more extant than in other non-lucid dreams (even more than when such as a porch is rendered to symbolize the waking space, a porch otherwise being my most common waking space symbolism, representing a specific state of unconsciousness between dreaming and waking). The majority of my open ceiling dreams have my current address (that is, the address of where I am living at the time of a particular dream) as the setting, and most often have more common dream state indicators. (Most of my non-lucid dreams have far less current conscious self connections and are more distorted in anachronistic composites of various places I have lived in the past). This validates the nature of a ceiling and roof as representing the specific level of unconsciousness itself (in a similar way as a wall or fence does in relating to liminal space division, though with more viable threads of conscious self identity). This is even more so than dream state indicators such as beds in being potential exit points or focal points of emergent consciousness factors (and yet I do not really typify a ceiling or roof as a dream state indicator, as it is not directly related to bedrooms, beds, being undressed in public or private, or the clearer nature of sleeping and dreaming).

      I do a lot of writing and reading in my dream, going back over at least a dozen dreams that clearly reveal the roof factor. Eventually, I wake, feeling only vaguely annoyed at having “lost” all my writing, but feeling somewhat amused at having a long dream where I was writing about past dreams and not knowing I was dreaming. In fact, there were more past dream references in this dream than any other in recent memory, possibly more than ever before. It is also interesting in how it relates to how we had our roof replaced in real life just recently (after the storm tore it off over a month ago) in the most terrifying event of my life.


      Tags: reading, roof, writing
      Categories
      non-lucid
    13. The Mandelbrot Source

      by , 12-24-2017 at 12:05 PM
      Morning of December 24, 2017. Sunday.



      The foundation of this dream was totally unexpected, as it was based on a computer program I wrote nearly fifteen years ago and of which I had not thought about for years, before we moved from Brisbane.

      I am in an unknown residence but which seems to be where we are implied to be living. My youngest son and I are looking at a large poster-sized image of surreal imagery. In some sections, there are human-like figures of which were created randomly by a special algorithm with a basis for a more natural choice of which next color and in which direction the line would continue. I remember that the first version of my computer program merely had an equal probability for each next line to continue from its previous point. It was like watching an invisible pencil scribble all over the screen, sometimes with insignificant leaf-like or vine-like (or spaghetti-like) patterns (and of course sometimes going beyond the range of the screen and coming back again, though my second version did not have this potential occurrence). Using probability based on a real drawing or other image was more interesting, though still resulted in surreal images that usually did not really look like much of anything. Bitmap (BMP file) templates had to be used (for gleaning probability of particular values as a percentage of the original total), each template image of course producing different results.

      I begin to consider that it is very strange, yet intriguing, that images that look so much like people standing around were created randomly. I consider altering how the program is running. My “computer” is very large, bigger than my entire desk in real life. The monitor is the size of a large window. The image appears on the screen and I print it out when I see something interesting.

      At one point, I seem to have done something wrong, as when the program starts again, the imagery remains in vertical orientation, looking something like a vine growing upwards, though with “leaves” coming out from each side now and then. I try to adjust it.

      Eventually, something quite unusual occurs, as my program seems to be missing certain subroutines. Sections of written print keep appearing along with parts of a Mandelbrot image. It seems like the parts are coming from the same original image, but in unusual irregular swirls and patches over prior imagery. Now I know something is wrong, but I have the false memory that my original template was a Mandelbrot image above a paragraph or two of writing, possibly from a virtual textbook or database. I am somewhat annoyed that it is not working as it should. (I do not consider that I would not have used an image of printed text for any sort of template to produce new random patterns from.) The area of random imagery selected (to be reapplied) is too large to make anything very unique. (This is an unusual false memory which is not perceived as such - yet my thinking skills are otherwise more present than usual as is my current conscious self.)

      Just as I think of fixing my program, there is ambiguity of being inside and outside at the same time. A nuclear explosion occurs nearby, though mostly only followed by small fireballs overhead. I get Zsuzsanna and our children and decide to go into a close-by underwater bunker, where I think we might be safe. (This is an attempt at dream state reinduction - returning to the essence of water, which represents the dynamics of sleep, as my sleep was slightly restless towards morning due to the extra warm weather.)


      Categories
      non-lucid
    14. Not Exactly “Family Affair”

      by , 12-21-2017 at 05:32 AM
      Morning of December 21, 2017. Thursday.



      In my dream, I am living with Zsuzsanna at the Stadcor Street house in Wavell Heights, where we have not lived in years. However, it seems like a “Family Affair” scenario. I happen to seemingly be in the role of Johnny Whitaker as Jody Davis. Zsuzsanna is in the role of Anissa Jones as Buffy Davis. Marilyn (older half-sister on my mother’s side) is in the role of Kathy Garver as Sissy Davis. I am about ten years old and Zsuzsanna (disproportionately to my age) is about eight. We do not look like the television show characters though. We look like ourselves at those ages.

      However, Brian Keith is himself, as I know him as Brian Keith rather than his character on the television show. The same with Sebastian Cabot. There is no memory of any of the actors having died. There is no memory of my sister having died. Even though Zsuzsanna is present and we are in the Stadcor Street house, all other memory of my current conscious self identity is absent.

      Zsuzsanna, Marilyn, and I are in the kitchen. Brian Keith is working with some sort of large boiler (mostly shaped like a vertically rectangular prism) in the northwest corner of the kitchen. It nearly reaches the ceiling. Something goes wrong and hot water sprays out to the opposite side of the kitchen from the top of the boiler. I watch Brian working in an attempt to fix it. Still, a piece of the boiler falls out from the back. I see many flames near the bottom. I vaguely perceive Brian Keith as my father, even though on the television show, he was my character’s uncle. Even so, I start to realize that there may be danger. I am thinking it will explode and destroy much of the house.

      Brian stays, still trying to fix the problem, although I get Marilyn and Zsuzsanna to leave with me by going to the front of the house. On the way, Sebastian Cabot is sitting in an armchair (facing south) in the center of the lounge room, reading a novel. I tell him about the boiler. He formally waves us off to indicate that we should go to the porch to escape the danger. However, he remains seated and calm as if not concerned about the imminent explosion. I think about walls exploding toward us if we do not get to the porch in time, but at another level, I am not really that concerned and remain without much emotion.

      Despite the setting having been the Stadcor Street house up to this point, when we go out to the porch from a fictional door in the middle of the west wall of the lounge room, we are then on the King Street boarding house porch (in America).

      My dream ends around this point and there is no explosion. (A porch is my most common dream state end marker, which symbolizes the higher level of unconsciousness between dreaming and waking in real time, and has as such since early childhood.)

      There is another dream after this, which is not related to this one at all. However, there is then a dream that is related to this same scenario but somewhat different. I am now as I was in the 1980s, though I also, in direct contradiction, perceive myself to have the computer that I have now at our present address. I am even aware of where my computer is, or was, regarding the Stadcor Street house. Oddly though, I do not recall my current conscious self status or of living in Australia (even though the Stadcor Street house is in Australia and I still live in Australia).

      The boiler is still acting up. Brian Keith is not present, but I talk to Marilyn (recognizing her as my real sister this time) about how hot it is getting near the west kitchen wall, which may affect the east wall of my den. I ask her if the heat will ruin my computer and she nods without speaking. I yell “f–k you” at an absent Brian Keith about ten times prior to fully waking. (I have not seen “Family Affair” since the 1970s.)



      What a delightfully and ridiculously mangled mess of nonsense this is. I have no idea where any of it came from other than the waking transition symbolism that has been very familiar since childhood. (This includes a boiler or furnace symbolizing the emergent consciousness factor via RAS - the reticular activating system, which is perceived as causing the dream state to enter an “end of the world” perspective, usually completely unrelated to waking life and restricted to merely symbolizing the end of the dream state as it has thousands of other times since early childhood. Fire typically symbolizes the conscious self identity in its emergent consciousness roots in coming out of the dream state - though in this case, there is also the association with the hotter weather.) The kitchen setting usually indicates mild hunger during sleep, more so towards morning. There is also the possibility that, in this case, the potential for the boiler exploding relates to the digestive process (as it was in the kitchen), though I did not have heartburn at any recent point. My concern about my computer was from a subliminal thread of memory from a worker coming in early this morning and fixing the ceiling in our front room, though the computer is on the opposite side from where the work was done.


    15. Roofer Intrusion

      by , 12-20-2017 at 07:32 AM
      Morning of December 19, 2017. Tuesday.



      This dream occurred during the time we had been trying to sleep, early in the morning, with the roofers having worked on our house in reality, but during their break and when we fell asleep.

      In my dream, there is a scene where one of the roofers is actually in our house and I see that he is watching Zsuzsanna sleep. I am not lucid. This annoys me very much, but he soon leaves. Meanwhile, I notice strange features hanging from the ceiling, about three feet from the floor. There are four of them, defining a square’s vertices. They look like vertically flat objects, seemingly made of material such as vinyl, but with the look of a chest of drawers. I do not consider this feature strange even though most of my conscious self identity is extant.

      Later, I am looking through our clerestory windows and see two roofers (each one’s face through a different window, the first and third from the left). A lot of black smoke is coming from the first roof tier to the left. Apparently, it is coming from a power tool, but I am vaguely considered that it may be toxic. The other male is looking on. Both look at us at times. This has the essence of a false awakening, and the roofers are starting to make noise in real life by this point.



      This is a typical intruder dream triggered by real environmental sounds and vaguely perceived “intruders” at the time. However, they did not actually come into our house or watch us through our clerestory windows, as this is just the RAS (reticular activating system) mode that functions as such when one is unconscious. (Understanding dreams is not difficult despite most people bizarrely having no clue as to what a dream actually is). I am not lucid in this particular case. Chase dreams are of the same nature, also rendered by way of RAS, which renders the personified preconscious to alert the dreamer into waking, because waking is a biological necessity. It is that simple. (Some people do have too much stress, though, and as such, would likely rather to continue to sleep, which RAS simply will not allow out of biological need.)

      Additionally, looking through a window represents the waking space (that is, the liminal space between dreaming and waking). The black smoke (a real-time symbol) symbolizes the nature of being asleep (and has occurred in other dreams as such, including a few positive, even blissful dreams). The unusual hanging features likely relate to the fact I am not “on the ground”. That is, it is a dream state indicator similar to that of “The Hanging Doll” in that it symbolizes my physical body being in bed, though is also linked to my dream’s distorted perception of the four roofers, and their temporary status of being on our home’s roof (as four “floating chests” that have very limited storage for “a longer stay”). I have always found it utterly bizarre that people do not seem to understand that what is going on in a dream is based on being in the dream state itself. How could so many people not be aware of something so obvious?



      The roofers in real life extended and built over our second-tiered roof (pretty much destroying the purpose of a clerestory roof) so that it now blocks the clerestory windows and only ugly rafters are visible. One even said he would come around and board them up from inside. Zsuzsanna told him no, but for people to even do things like this and suggest things like this means that something is apparently “missing” from their mind, an inability to think or understand anything (too much alcohol perhaps? In the DNA?). Zsuzsanna and I have conversations often about what is “missing” from so-called normal people.


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