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    Lucid-schizo-dreamer

    Dream Warrior and Explorer of the Dreamplane

    1. 20 Mar: Rescuing cats, parasites and toxic bugs, superman alter-egos

      by , 03-20-2021 at 11:42 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      At a house which appears to be Carla's home. There's my mom and my grandpa along with a bunch other people, as if they all live together there. There is an earthquake and I suggest we get out while it is happening, but my mom points out that grandpa can't get up and walk on his own. So while we're doing our best to lift him, the earthquake stops. People feel like it is ok to stay, but I go check the house and some rooms look dangerously affected, with awful cracks on walls and ceiling. I insist on evacuating everybody and I manage to grab my grandpa on my own over my shoulder and take him away, but then mom and a friend remind me about all the cats that live there and especially like to gather on the rooms that are most damaged. I tell them I will get them all to safety, and I start grabbing them two at a time and putting them in improvised boxes and containers to a safer area of the building, and closing these rooms shut. But there seem to be more and more cats popping up. At some point the corner room that was more damaged, is really coĺapsing and the cats are just there hanging out like totally oblivious of the danger upon them.

      At some modern house with glass walls and straight lines over a grassy hill. There is a bunch of kids that come over for activities and I am somewhat responsible for them. We are playing with a radio broadcaster or similar and I am thirsty so I go drink a glass of water. It tastes horribly and I notice it is orange like it has rust in it. I go check our water source, some kind of well, and it is poisoned by two kinds of dead processionary caterpillars, one of them which is orange and black and I've never seen before. Doesn't seem very safe. Meanwhile I spot a bunch of them on the ground and before the kids or dogs touch them, I rush to pick them all and put them on a bucket. But on doing so, I grab some soil that is infested with different bugs and worms and there are some thin long ones that I think are baby earthworms, until one gets between my fingers and finds a way through my skin. It is so thin and slimy I can't get a hold of it and it enters inside my hand. I can feel it moving and it is exasperating and painful. I go to the doctor immediately and she gives me really grim news saying I just drunk water with a deadly toxin and have inside me the worst parasite that grows the larger of all. She says I have also been bitten twice by a black widow and I'm like "when was that, because I didn't complain about any of that?". She starts me on treatment but says the prospects aren't the best. I cry like a baby and say I'll never again even step outside the safety of a city.

      Me and Riverstone run a little shop with everything from new and used clothes to a books and antiques and we also have a few boxes with stuff for free that people can just take. Some lady is interested in used baby clothes as she can't afford brand new clothes and I am having difficulty in finding it in the middle of the mess the shop is in at the moment. She asks if some stuff she likes can be taken for free and Riverstone says yes, because he is overwhelmed by the excess stock we have, but I think it is very sellable stuff so I say no to her. Meanwhile the lady is waiting regarding the baby clothing and I tell her to come back the next day and I'll have the stuff she wants. That's when I notice she is a little person.
      Then I see some other customer sitting on a stone slab outside where some slug like creatures are sneaking behind him and because of my previous dream with worms, I panic and warn him about it. Still, one of them hooks itself on his back, like a leech. Fortunately we manage to unhook it. Then some stupid ass idiot comes by with a bunch of these worms in a jar, throws them at me and runs away. Everybody freaks out and helps me shake them out of my hair and check if any has latched on my body, but we think I am in the clear.
      I then get possessed and chase that mf down. Turns out it was a girl, she teases me like "so what? what will you do?" and I go full "Kali Ma" on her (Indiana Jones ref) and plunge my hands in her chest ripping her organs out and then to finalize it, I intend to project flames from my mouth, like a dragon, but instead I project hot green vomit on her, like the possessed girl in the Exorcist.
      When things calm down a bit, I sit with Zilla, Vera and a couple other friends at some outdoor cafť to drink something and relax. There are familiar faces around from my school past. I hear some music that makes me smile. And Vera interprets that I am smiling because I saw a guy on the next table, she assumes I have a crush on. So she takes a photo of him with her cellphone and goes around telling everyone he is my crush. He actually is a guy who bullied me a lot in middle school, his nickname was "ass-bomb" because he once farted in the classroom or something.
      I am fully aware now and tired of silly games so I explain to her what I was smiling at and whom the guy is and decide to go for a walk and do something with my lucidity. The area is like a kasbah, very tight streets with earth-rammed houses and vendors' tents. I soak in the diversity while thinking what to do. I see a few more familiar faces from middle school, another couple bullies for whom I actually feel tenderness, not so much from what they did but just to see them as they were back then, kids who haven't aged. I find it precious that I still keep their faces stored in my memory. Then something odd happens.
      Superman falls from the sky onto some iron structure like the entrance to a train station or something. He seems to struggle to get on his feet, then he is attacked by what seems another superman who looks more like a super butch superwoman, way more muscular than the original, but with a female face. And she beats the shit out of him. Then comes an emo superman, very pale and skinny and scared. He doesn't really do anything, just watches, confused, I am also confused. I decide to fly up where they are, to watch it better and maybe help the real superman, I don't know. But they kinda stop fighting and look at me surprised, like "and who the hell are you?". I feel like they now might pick a fight with me, so I just let go and fly away and let them sort it out.

      I keep flying but now I am actually on a plane over Florida. Instead of landing in the airport, it lands on water but not as an accident, apparently it is an hydroplane. The sky is so bright blue, no clouds, sun is shining bright, wonderful weather and beautiful light. When we land on the water, people are then taken to some water taxis and escorted by jet skis who are there as a backup (they have rafts for taking in people if necessary). I find it a bit too much of a precaution, but I am impressed with the organization. Some kid is looking at me and I smile at him. Most people are families with kids and I feel they are going to Disney World.

      Updated 03-20-2021 at 11:50 AM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , nightmare
    2. 15 Mar: Environmental talk and a couple festivals at a park

      by , 03-15-2021 at 09:57 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      At the grocery store, some lady is messing with some guy over his plastic bags and trying to convince him to switch to cotton bags. I am thinking to myself how that ain't necessarily the best option and remembering a video I've watched about it, but I chose to stay quiet because I am sure I'd just add confusion. But then they start talking about environmentally-friendly options in general and other customers join in the debate. At some point the cashier asks us if anyone has tried Iberdrola or Coopernico as energy providers and I say I am a Coopernico client. Someone else claims Iberdrola is 100% renewable and someone else claims they also have nuclear. I am not sure but I say I think not. I still argue that Coopernico is better because it is a national co-op but no one seems to care much about that.

      I pass by a festival at a park. The actor Diogo Morgado is playing DJ while dressed as Jesus and embarrasses himself. Everybody laughs at him and someone tells him to get a girlfriend. He strangely replies that I am his girlfriend. I say no way and I get out of there and go for a walk. I am told there is a more underground festival going on at a hidden place in this same park. We have to step on some tires piled up against a wall and go through an opening on that wall into a derelict building with a maze of walls. Across corridors with no roof and some small rooms, lots of punks and hippies sell their crafted jewellery and vegan food. Then some creepier stalls where they pierce us with nails. A dude insists that I go through the procedure, I argue I don't have money but he says he borrows me the money and I pay back later. I run away. There is a food court with tables on an open area. I sit with some friendly looking people but a bunch of lesbian activist girls come bully another girl because she ain't activist and they claim she has to and fight for their rights. I don't like their attitude and shout that it is ok for someone not to be an activist if they don't want to, but they ignore me. I get tired of being there, so I go away through the same place I came.

      Evening is falling and I decide to just go for a walk in a quiet place of the park. There are big beautiful trees and no people. Until I spot a dude acting suspiciously, following me from afar. I decide to levitate to a height he can't get me. He tries to reach me by jumping and then he climbs to some kind of terraced building to be at my level and I find his attempt funny, because he is basically stuck there. But I get closer to ask him what he wants from me. He says he just wants to talk. Says he sent me a work related email back in September and he never got my reply. I say I am sorry but surely I never got it or I would have replied. Ask him why he didn't try again or called. Tell him to resend it that I will reply on same day. He is pleased and goes away.
    3. 15 Jan: Invisible guy, anti-maskers, vain people and japanese sword maker

      by , 02-15-2021 at 10:36 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      I am a guy who can become invisible. I see some guys bullying some kids and I follow them to see if they get violent. Instead, they take the kids to a house and I worry they are going to abuse them. One of them sits on a bed and calls the kids over. That's when I use my power of invisibility to attack them. They are confused but after a while of taking beatings, they realize it is an invisible being and develop a plan to catch me. I have to climb things and hang from places to escape them. This goes on for some time.
      Then I learn they have a sister and I fall in love with her at first sight. I become visible to her and she also falls for me. She helps me to get out of there and we talk a bit outside and become friends.

      We depart and I go to a grocery store. I notice the prices are ridiculously high, supposedly because this is a very chic neighborhood. I can only afford a tiny bag of snacks for 2Ä. At the counter, the cashier is insisting with two ladies that they have to wear mask, but resist and are rude to the cashier. I remember I am also not wearing one, so before I get closer to the counter, I put mine on. I get pissed at the women's attitude justifying their carelessness with pseudo-scientific arguments, so I scream at them that I am a biologist and all they just said is BS and tell them to wear the damn mask.

      My mom picks me up by car outside and we pass by some of the fanciest buildings in the area. Namely a big fancy hotel with only expensive cars outside and fashionable people hanging around. There is a couple heading to some sports car who are basically naked, as their designer clothes are just weird avant-garde black underwear. The guy has a thong and his basically butt naked. We make some joke about it and they hear it and they seem offended that we don't appreciate their high end futuristic naked suits. Further ahead I see lots of young aspiring models and just fashionable youngsters aspiring to fame, who hang out in a square waiting to be "discovered". Some are vlogging, others are being filmed for some reality show, but it looks like a freak show.

      Then my mom says she needs to go to this address of a Japanese man who makes knifes. I am pretty curious. We arrive there already late evening, he lives in a modern Japanese style house. There is one door to his residence and the next door is his shop, which has a window display with his work. The shop is dark and closed, so we ring the bell to his residence. No one comes and then we see some movement on an enclosed balcony on the first floor. We see a man moving and then half a dozen men in suits attacking him and being neutralized. I wonder if we should insist on talking to the guy. He clearly is more than a knife maker. But then his wife shows up at the door and welcomes us warmly. We say what we want and she takes us to the shop. There are lots of kitchen knifes and traditional Japanese crafts. Even some katanas, but all decorative. I ask her if her husband also forges swords and she seems upset with my questions. Claims he does not and never did. I sense that she is lying so I insist. Then realize either he no longer wants to or he just doesn't sell it to anyone asking. I want to know more so I try to show her I am not just someone. I ask from where in Japan they are, tell her I have been there some time myself. Unfortunately I don't know their village or town so I can't break the ice with that. But I start telling about the places I've been. She doesn't seem impressed. But she likes my mom and offers her some cakes. They sit at a table that has no place for me. I feel awkward but my mom, she tells me to sit down on the floor next to her and hands me over bits of the cakes.
    4. 18 Aug: Meeting a long lost love

      by , 08-18-2019 at 09:27 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening


      Somewhere with family members and a few acquaintances. My uncle Zť is there, still living. Zilla is also present. I am trying on a dress she absolutely loves. It's a tight, red polka dots, no shoulders dress. People gasp seeing me in it. She asks where I bought it. I think C&A but we check the label with and it says some other brand. Anyway, she is sad she missed the chance to have one just like it.
      We walk to some shops with dresses on their windows. She points to a few dresses, asks my opinion, I dislike all. She gives up, we part ways and she heads to her car.
      Meanwhile, I spot Matos, who just saw me and heads towards me. He looks super thrilled for seeing me, tells me so and invites me for a coffee. I hesitate. He asks if I'm married. I say no, but that I have a commitment. He argues we left something in mid-air in our past, recalls our deep connection and asks if we could restart from where it was left as he never stopped thinking of me. I recall our teenage love with sweetness. But I am through with it.
      I telĺ him my car is in the opposite direction he is heading. Suggest him we should treasure the memories we have but move on with our lives. He insists it was unfair, that we shouldn't have lost touch, that our connection is one in a lifetime. I tell him he was special alright, but that at best he is maybe the 3rd option on my backup list. Not even true, he is no longer on the list. He is heartbroken. I feel sorry but just wanna go away and say goodbye to him.
    5. 23 Apr: Bullies, babysitting and a sexual fantasy with Eva Green (graphic)

      by , 04-23-2019 at 09:28 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      I watch a friend bringing his gay boyfriend home for a dinner with the family. Family is unaware they date, and maybe even that he is gay. So it comes as a great shock when they casually mention it. Also, the guy had a recent drug problem and his parents are highly controlling it and all hell breaks lose when he shares that his boyfriend is a meth addict in recovery. They leave the dinner and go to the train station, it is raining and they kiss and make out. A train arrives and some guys that usually bully them get out from it. The couple decides to walk away and avoid them.
      Then I am caught in the action, as I stand in their way to allow the guys to escape. The bullies get pissed at me. I escape, but later I am in school and they bully me at the sports field. I don't feel fear, but I want to expose them, so I find a way to record them bullying me. They mock me, force me to do push ups and other silly things as they say intimidating things and somehow I end up naked from waist up. But I feel pleased because I got footage of it and pictures of the 4 guys. I run to the house of a friend. At her window is Conan Osiris (the musician) who is apparently her friend and looks surprised to see this girl running in topless. They borrow me a blanket that I use to cover myself and then everybody feels more comfortable to hear what I have to say. Then we make a plan to show these images the next day to some teacher or the director.
      But the next day there is something going in the school behind closed doors at the auditorium, some presentation or so. Outside in the lobby there are many strange machines like ATMs and we are told by a lady at a desk to take a machine with us and join the presentation.

      Late night with my mom at a retail shop to buy a blanket for some baby. The shop closes and we are the only ones left. I am actually excited we might spend the night in there, but a worker spots us and tells us to go towards the exit. We argue we haven't yet found the blanket and because it is for a baby, she feels moved and helps us finding it. Then we take it home to the baby, which we are just taking care of and I have no idea who the mother is. I fall in love with the little one, but I get disappointed that he rejects all the food I give him. My mom feeds him chocolate desserts and it's the only thing he'll eat. I argue against it, but she says it's too late to break the habit. I say if it was my kid I'd cut all sugars.

      Watching and then taking part of a Tarantino movie, so excited with how awesome it is. I am walking into a heavily guarded compound to talk to some bigshot, who happens to be played by Eva Green. I have to exit the building to an interior garden and have to meet her at the garden house, which is also heavily surrounded by guards. I am led by an attendant. First the girl goes in with a dress to hand over to Eva. I hear that she doesn't like as much as she likes the attendant's own dress, but accepts it anyway. Then I am allowed to go in and my first thought is how incredibly hot she is and I hope she changes the dress in front of me. She doesn't but anyway we don't talk much.
      I simply go towards her and grope her. I grab one of her breasts and suck it through her thin clothes. (I'm not a lesbian, but I just find her the hottest and most beautiful woman and I would definitely do her ). Then something bizarre happens and I become her! Now I am horny for myself. I start to undress in front of a mirror and I suck my own breasts (a dream ability I have!). I touch myself while admiring my goddess-like beauty. I am not Eva Green anymore, I transformed into a Buddhist deity, even more beautiful and irresistible. I can't hold up the hornyness anymore and I find a rubber toy on the table and I use it for my pleasure.
      Some guard comes in and sees me, but I am not disturbed by it, nor do I feel like having him join. He feels awkward and slowly walks out in silence. I continue pleasing myself in front of the mirror and I climax gently and continuously and feel an amazing sensation of well-being rushing through my veins (not just in the dream, I actually had an orgasm in RL).
    6. 6 Mar: undercover in California, attacked by a Chinese, parade with Madonna

      by , 03-06-2019 at 12:13 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening


      At a bridge, looking at a map on the phone. I am in California, its nighttime. I am supposed to go see a place that is still a bit far. Because it is late, I choose instead to visit an alternative coffee shop nearby. It has several floors, it is know for famous people going there. I don't see any. Go to the roof terrace, very cool for photos. From there I see a multiplex cinema on the other side of a river. There is a small island in the middle of the river. I go there and find a beautiful young feline there that I become friends with. Not sure what species it is, but looks like a jaguar. Then I see also some babies that she is nursing.

      Undercover in a bad neighborhood to expose some drug dealers. There are people of all ethnicities and nationalities living and doing business there. Most are selling clothes, but many are just covers to the real drug business. I go through an alley with a chinese shop and I am approached by two men selling shirts. I have a bunch of money, so I show them trying to expose them as drug sellers. But they just sell me shirts. One guy has good quality clothes but the other tries to sell me an old ripped coat and I reject his offer. He doesn't like my rejection and I feel something is wrong with this, don't understand his game. Later I spot him following me. When night falls he runs towards me in a deserted area but I step aside and push him to the road. He falls on the asphalt and a high speed car runs over him before he can get up.
      Then I turn to another street and there is a parade going on and I blend with it. Madonna is leading the parade in a car and part of the theme is Disneyworld and I can't resist to take some photos.
    7. 12 Jan: Moving to my mom's house and alien creatures

      by , 01-12-2019 at 10:39 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      With mom and some other family members, walking in Vila Franca. Mom notices the stationery shop run by a lady we know, is liquidating everything and going to close. My mom talks to the lady owner and starts crying while hugging her. The lady feels awkward. Says she will keep the place, she is just transforming the business and turning it into a post office. But my mom still feels emotional as she has lots of memories from this little shop.
      Then we all go home to my mom's, but she doesn't live there, I do. I am just moving and my family members try to help me unpacking things, but they just leave a bigger mess. Then they have to leave in a hurry, they gotta take a plane or something. I am in the kitchen sorting produce for the fridge and I hear noise. My front door ain't well shut, and some guy with furniture on the hallway tries to come in when I open the door. He thought that was his home. He is also moving next door. I explain to him he got the wrong door, he goes to the right place. But now my door doesn't close. I think I have go to the carpentry.
      It is not far, I just have to cross a short path through a wild patch of land and cross a bridge over a very small river, when I spot a strange animal with the body of a kiwi and the beak of a platypus. He looks intelligent but fearful when I approach. He keeps jumping around and I follow him and try to attract him. But although he is enjoying the interaction, he disappears behind some bushes. I go around and now I see another animal. Same type of black greyish fur, but a body type like an antelope and a creepy head like a skull with two black round eyes. When I look in his eyes I recognize the same animal. And I keep following him. He then returns again to a smaller blob like shape and escapes over some emergency staircase on the back of a building, to join two other similar beings, that I understand to be his parents. They look surprised at me. They move on to a populated area but other people don't seem to see them. They keep morphing and looking all sorts of alien and no one even blinks. I was not supposed to see them either, but I do, so when they stop on top of some beams in a covered pathway, I wave at them so they are sure I can see them and they look really puzzled. Meanwhile, I call my friends ghostbusters and they join me soon after. They to catch a glimpse of the creatures, so I am not the only one who can see them.
    8. 07 Feb: poor vs rich and riding a dragon

      by , 02-08-2014 at 12:24 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      (...) I live in a poor neighbourhood. My family sells clothes in a small shop in a shady corner. Some bullies come to collect money from us, but they get more interested in myself and I have to run through back alleys to escape them. At some point I enter a back door of a building and find myself at some kind of posh shopping center. I continue running, but I have time for some observations. I see, for instance, a lady trying on some jewelry the shop keeper put over the counter and as they turn around for a second, I manage to grab a beautiful necklace, but I throw it away before exiting with it. It would be so helpful to sell it and make some money for my family, but I can't. It's not so much that I find it absolutely wrong, but I believe there's a good chance it has an alarm of some sort and I would be caught and it really wasn't worthwile. So I drop it and keep running. I exit through another door and I find myself crossing an oriental-style spa. It's so soothing, but if they see me there, I'll be caught and jailed, so I keep running. I finally exit the building and get to a non-urbanized area, by a riverbed. The sun is setting and I duck under some bushes. I stay there until it's dark and I sense that there's no one looking for me. I then walk through a dirt road and I find a well. I look at it and see the moon reflected on the water and I feel an absolute sense of peace and detachment. I touch the rough stones of the well and have a strange feeling that they are moving. Scared, I fall on the ground and covered in mud, I see a dragon arising from the well, the stones becoming his scales. Is he going to hurt me? I feel that it's up to me. It all depends if I run from him or if I tame him. So, in a corageous decision, I grab some scales on his neck and I decide to ride it. He turns his head and looks menacing, but then he talks to me and he says something magic I can't pronounce even if I wanted. But I understand he is going to take me somewhere.
      He drops me at some big palace like hotel or something. I wonder how I can go inside covered in mud, but then he merges with me and his scales transform into a beautiful golden scaled mermaid strapless dress and I look like a queen. The doors open for me and I'm inside. But I keep feeling a stranger and everytime I cross paths with someone on the lobby, at the hallways, I fear that they will see through me and notice that I don't belong. But they don't.
      I see everyone heading to some kind of concert room and I follow them, trying to mingle. Some old rich couple starts talking to me, I have to lie about a few things, and I wonder if I'll be asked for a ticket a the door and look stupid for not having one. They do ask for ticket and I don't have, but the way I look, they don't even doubt I haven't paid for the show, they believe I just forgot and allow me in. I can't believe it is so simple. Some guy offers me a coat and then I see why. The doors open to an open air amphitheatre over a hill and it's a chilly night. We take our seats and we get a package. If we're on an even row we must open it to the right and if we're on an odd row we must open it to the left (or vice-versa). Inside are some kind of 3D goggles and other weird gadgets. I wonder what this show is about. Then I see some kind of gigantic molecular structures with lights floating above us and I'm said the show is about to start.
      Categories
      non-lucid
    9. 10 Oct: The biggest fear and relationships

      by , 10-27-2010 at 07:38 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING PRECOG

      21:30 GMT+9 Ė sleep

      My biggest fear
      On some strange shop (like some Japanese shops Iíve been at) with really attractive cakes and sweets, but I couldnít really tell if thatís what they were. Then a guy on the shop is taken down a corridor and told thereís a test to him. Behind a big door at the end of the corridor is the scariest thing that has ever haunted his dreams. In his case he says he used to play a game with his friends in which theyíd hide and seek and the one seeking the others would incarnate a scary character theyíd call the fog-man, a mythical creature that would take away the soul of the one found by him Ė and then this kid would replace the fog-man in his role. The man said he used to have nightmares with the real fog-man taking his soul. Then the people overseeing this test told this man that whatever heíd find behind that door would be his own mindís creations and therefore if he was certain of that, they wouldnít possibly harm him, but if he failed to recognise that... The door opened and out of it came a dense thick fog. He entered and the door was closed.
      I also wanted to play. I opened the door and there was still fog but no signs of the man. The fog disappeared. I tried to think about what is that scares me the most and had this vague feeling of something unknown and scary coming out of the darkness and attacking me but before it would materialise I decided I was in the control of my mind and therefore no fear would take over. Then all the fog and light darkness dissipated and I found myself in an empty room with a mirror and a door. I positioned myself in front of the mirror, saw my reflexion. I was dressed in white and yellow and although I looked a bit strange it was still my normal look, no monstrous face or anything of the kind.
      Iím semi-lucid and I dance a little bit both to increase lucidity and test my image on the mirror. I manage to prolong lucidity but it is still weak in terms of control. Not sure about what to do I decide to summon all of the people I know through the door. Soon I start seeing people from my past, present acquaintances, family, ďenemiesĒ. I canít tell if everyone is there, it would be impossible, but soon they start interacting with me.
      I lose lucidity. I am with my aunt India and my friend Zilla. Zilla decides to call my old friend Mara, whom I donít see since her wedding. Her brother answers the phone. Zilla doesnít say a word and he gets upset. He hads the phone over to Mara in the hope the person will talk to her. She asks ďwhoís there?Ē and I can see both people on each side of the line now. I tell Zilla this is a stupid game and I donít see the point of it. Mara then thinks she knows who can be and gets very worried. She says ďdonít worry, I will come for you. Iíll help you.Ē Obviously she thought someone in distress was needing her help. I tell Zilla to please stop it and just say something on the phone!
      Then I am engulfed by a lot more people I know and thereís this lady, whoís my opponent in my work and hates my guts, among them. When I see her I remember we were both at a same party some past time and we talked to each other when we were so drunk already and our hate transformed into attraction and we had kissed. I was wondering how could we still be mad at each other after that. We had been stripped down from our divergences and connected as human beings, but here we were still as enemies.
      Then Iím outside in some big city with skyscrapers and neon lights. I enter a van and someone else is by my side. Zilla is on front seat by the side of the driver. She hands me over a synthesizer she bought but I already have other things on my lap I also bought and she feels angry with my refusal to take up more stuff.
      Then on some kind of mall I see a lady doctor famous in my country who is giving an interview about birth and how women should embrace hospital methods instead of this trend of natural child birth at home, cause so much can go wrong and they need medication and blah-blah. I go to her and make a phenomenal speech to counterbalance Ė not radical, but very well balanced I refute her ideas that seem to approach giving birth as being seriously ill. Then my friend Zilla and others come with a more radical attitude and start making hate speech and mess up everything. I later ask why they did it and they said I sounded to compromising. I told them I had simply used skilful means to pass the message across without conflict. By then I have a group of followers and admirers but among this group there are a few who donít understand my way of doing things and always create a fuss. Iím on some high room with view over some kind of inner court. People are down there celebrating the result of some football (soccer) game and I comment loudly about the frivolity of such celebration. They get upset. They accuse me of being peaceful and moderate to the outside but quite radical inside and that the radical activists that are around me just reinforce that I am a secret extremist. As I seek to be alone to digest such accusations, these two radical friends of mine follow me and I scream at them to leave me alone, that it is their fault people think such things of me. Walking down a street I encounter another guy that went to school with me. We talk and I conclude the big issue here to be solved is if I am becoming what my father said I would become or the opposite of that. Am I an extremist under disguise or am I really becoming moderate and if so, am I moderate in the sense my father preached (which resembled too much with conformity) or am I moderate due to wisdom and maturity? As I wander through these philosophical matters, I conclude, after all this dream sequence, that my biggest fear of all, is to become like my father or the person my father wants me to be.


      03:00 GMT+9

      Cat stapled
      My cat is showing some discomfort. I cuddle him and find a staple on his belly. I take it off gently. My mom is upset and worried and I search for more. I find lots of staples on his skin. We donít know how this happened and feel sorry for the poor fellow.

      Friends and relationships
      Iím in the middle of a crowd whoís watching a movie on an open air cinema. I am by the side of two old girl friends from school and all is fine until it starts raining. At first itís ok, but my friends start complaining itís raining too much and open an umbrella. Then not even that is enough and they want to leave. But Iím just fine. The rain is not really wetting me and I say it is just dream rain. Still they leave and I decide to go along. Didnít go lucid.
      Then sitting around a wooden rectangular table with my friends. One is Mara and she says her husband calls her names and I assume he is also violent with her. She asks for advice and I say she needs to get away from him, but she doesnít want to. Then he also joins the table and I change subject but she says we can go on, that she doesnít want to make it a secret. My other friend present doesnít understand this, thinks heíll get mad and beat her up later but I say maybe she wants to confront him but canít do it alone, so we should help. He says he likes her, but she didnít reveal to be the woman of his dreams and so he gets angry sometimes out of frustration. I ask him why doesnít he simply leave her and go look for that dream woman? I say if my dream guy was Brad Pitt, I would go after him, no matter what and not beat some other guy for not being Brad Pitt. He feels embarrassed by seeing the ridiculous and we laugh together.
      Then my boyfriend comes up and he insists on having sex immediately. I donít think it is appropriate and also I feel like he wants to force me like a punishment for something. He drags me to some room and rips my clothes off but I get really upset with his attitude and I escape from him. Outside I meet this guy who I had a crush for in highschool. I am happy to see him and I follow him. He is climbing some steps to go inside a house. I go to. Itís like an antique shop but with rooms. I lie down on some sofa, my friend who was with me on the wooden table before is here now again and notices my interest in this guy. She says I should go for it right now but I feel bad, I just said no to my boyfriend. Then the guy comes to me and ask if I have some deodorant. I find that question completely dislocated but my friend says he is really into me and wants to be fragrant for me. I feel yuc!


      06:00 GMT+9 Ė wake up