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    1. 06 Oct: Stuck on false awakenings

      by , 10-24-2010 at 04:52 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING PRECOG

      During a 10h flight.

      14:30 GMT+2

      Stuck on false awakenings
      I wake up because the airplane is landing. After crossing the dark night in just a few hours, it’s daylight again. I feel incredibly thirsty and groggy. The airplane windows are huge and I can see a wide panorama while we’re landing. I find that strange and I do a RC. I find I’m still asleep but I don’t manage to wake up or to change dream or anything. It just keeps going and I feel stuck.
      Finally I wake up. I see daylight again but the windows are still wide. I do RC again and find out I’m still asleep. Thirst persists as well as discomfort grows but once again I cannot get out or wake up. I decide to let it flow and see where it leads. The airplane is landing on a small road with fences, gardens and houses on both sides. It keeps going until it stops by the side of a building that looks like a bus or train station. Everybody gets out of the airplane and I’m the last one. When I pass by the cockpit the pilot and co-pilot are already outside to and so I lean to check the instrument panel and so on. The co-pilot says to the pilot that I’m taking a peak at the cockpit and warns him they left the key on the ignition, so the pilot comes to me and asks me if I’m not planning to steal the plane. He is half joking and half serious. I respond “of course not, how could I fly this even if I wanted to?”. Then we leave to the nearest village, me, pilot, co-pilot and another girl who was left behind. The co-pilot says that everything is so compact around here that sometimes to go from one street to the other you have to cross through someone’s backyard. He tells me he has started a biodynamic garden just close from there but people keeping running over his vegetables and ruin everything. I find that all bizarre but the fact is to cross to some nearby cafés, we have to cross a sports field. We pass under some Japanese banners hanging over a door and enter a café. I remember I’m so thirsty and I see a bottle of water on some couple’s table, but I have my sigg bottle and go instead to the toilet to fill it in the tap. The pilots moved on, so I am just with this girl. I notice she is Japanese. Then as I drink the water I remember again I am just dreaming and what I really need is real water.
      I wake up. Exactly as previous times, but this time it is night. It doesn’t matter, I can still recognize I am still dreaming. I do RC again and confirm. I am starting to feel desperate. I can’t go out of this loop. I think about people I know, people I love, family members. I call for them. They establish a link to the awaken world and I finally wake up.

      7:20 GMT+9 - wake up

      The airplane is not yet landing but flight attendants are about to serve breakfast. It is day light outside and windows are normal. I see my sigg bottle of water and kill my thirst. Soon I was landing in Japan.

      Updated 10-24-2010 at 04:55 PM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , false awakening
    2. 04 Oct: Stories around a bar and attack of the Jennies

      by , 10-24-2010 at 03:58 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING PRECOG

      23:30 GMT – Sleep

      Fragments: Björk in a colourful dress. Stuff about my travel to Japan.

      2:00 GMT

      Decorating a bar
      On a terrace or penthouse, helping my mom decorating it. We decide where to put two bookshelves and at last minute she decides changing their place to maximize the space. This place is cozy but doesn’t look like a home to live in, more like a bar with glass walls around and view over the city. There are sofas in the middle and a bar desk on the left side. After we finish decorating it, the building starts shaking (recurrent dream) but this time I manage to stabilize it just by wishing it to stop.

      Watching and being on other people's skin
      Then I am an observer of a couple’s story. She is coming to this bar, she is a beautiful blond med student, coming for first time to this city for some event. She is married to an older guy who loves her very much but also has a secret affair with an older woman. This girl is not happy with her relationship but she thinks her husband is so devoted she can’t possibly hurt him. Then she meets a young doctor at this bar and they instantly connect and speak all night. She ends up in his apartment and they sleep together. She feels no guilt but her husband then calls to know where she is, because she was supposed to have taken the night train. She lied that she lost last train and had to sleep at train station. He is sick worried and promises to go get her immediately by car. She runs to train station and wonders how she’s gonna tell him the truth.
      Then I’m back on this bar, this time I am under the skin of a guy and another guy comes to me and asks me if I’m such and such person. I say yes and ask why. He says a friend told him great things about me and my last book published. I go humble and say it wasn’t that great and actually feel embarrassed.


      Ivy League University
      Then I’m myself and I’m outside. It’s early morning and I’m in front of what looks like some Ivy League University. I stand still for a while in front of its gates and hear some music coming from behind me, from what seems a parking meter. It is some hymn and it feels so enjoyable I listen to the end. Then I finally cross the street and enter the gates. I have some bags there and need to go get them to leave. I fly my way there and nobody cares except 3 or 4 guys who seem surprised and point at me. I land close to them and walk from there on. Some other guy and girl are walking around collecting signatures and donations for some health related NGO. I say I’m not interested right now and they don’t insist.

      Sandy beach
      Then the lawn becomes a sandy beach and I see kids playing. I spot a really cute baby alone in the sand and I pick him up, to find out it’s just a really believable doll. Then two girls come up and ask me to play with them. They have more of these dolls, girls and boys version.
      I become lucid and decide I must remember this sequence of dreams since I had already woke up before and was too tired to write notes. So I believe I woke up and I start writing on my DJ, then I go back to sleep. Only later I really wake up frustrated that it was a FA and then had hard time recalling the dreams.

      5:20 GMT

      The attack of the Jennies
      I go semi-lucid and decide to fly. I try to do that trick Neo does on Matrix, of kneeling down to lift off with high speed, but I only manage to jump a few meters high. I do some acrobatics in the air for fun or to impress someone. Then I decide climbing an old tree behind me that seems to impress some ladies on the ground. I see the clouds above me and I see a green pasture on top of a hill and I see a fence around a herd of cows. Then I put my hand on some tree branch and there’s a tarantula which gives me the creeps and I lose my semi-lucidity.
      When I go back to the ground I actually feel sorry for the spider – it looked really old and I think it missed a leg.
      It was becoming dark and I walk towards these ladies that look alike. All dressed in black, long straight hair and luminescent stripes on their outfits. Then I see them touching a guy and a girl which transform into copies of these ladies, with same exact look. When I realise they are up to no good, I hide behind a car and prepare to run but they spread like a virus and suddenly they are by my side. Just have time to fly away. Then no matter where I go they have taken over. I call them Jennies. In the morning I finally reach some property where some event is taking place and people still look normal. I think they are worth saving but how can I alert them and what can they do to defend themselves? I find my friend John Blacksmith and ask for his help. Because he is good at speeches, I tell him to interrupt the people talking and warning them, but when he gets the mic he doesn’t go straight to it. Through the window I can see Jennies coming. I push him and grab the mic and just say we’ve been invaded by some kind of aliens who take control over us just by touching us – most people think it’s a joke, but some lady asks me why do I assume they came to harm us. I say I don’t know if that’s the case, but whatever they are doing is not with our consent and therefore not acceptable. Anyway, soon they hear screams and realise it’s serious and start running in all directions. I escape through a sliding glass door behind me and fly to the roof. Soon they are everywhere and I don’t know what to do.

      7:30 GMT – wake up
    3. 02 Oct: Sucessive RPG task failures and meeting Nighthawk

      by , 10-04-2010 at 11:31 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING PRECOG

      0:30 GMT – Sleep

      Weird animals
      I’m under the viaduct at my home town, crossing a road that passes under it, when I see a cute fluffy cat with an enormous head, although inside the range of normality, passing by. I also see a pigmee elephant with antlers instead of tusks and a tiny short trunk. I also think he was a bit furry on the back. A truly weird animal. A gipsy woman approaches me saying she wants to read my future in my hands and I say I’m not interested. Then I realise I don’t have any money, any purse, not even keys to my home. Instead of despair I feel so free – I start realising I’m probably dreaming.

      Trying to do the RPG task I
      Then I’m inside some studio, watching a talk show being recorded and I decide to do the nose RC. Somehow it is not clear enough – I do have difficulties in breathing when I pinch my nose. So I do the ultimate test and cross a giant speaker box as if it was an hologram. OK, now I know I am dreaming. I remember the RPG task to go save the demon boy in the woods and I check my reflection somewhere just to be sure I’m on my RPG character (my warrior me). I am close but not enough. I try to summon weapons but when I look again I have strange hair in black, red and white shades. I get distracted by that and wake up.

      Trying to do the RPG task II
      I force myself into dream again and I find myself back in the studio again watching the talk show – boring! I have to start all over, but at least now I don’t need RC. I decide to move forward to jump to the RPG dream. I end up in the lobby of this building. It is golden with large glass windows and doors. I see the street outside. I look for something that can serve as portal and the best I can get is the glass doors. Good enough. I jump towards a door wishing to go to the woods and for a split second I am surrounded by trees and start deciding my next move. But the woods quickly transform and I find myself at my mom’s place. Shit! What’s going on today? It’s late night, everybody’s asleep and I hear noise in the kitchen. I go check and my mom left something in the stove, a cooker with beans that has no water anymore and the beans are burning and kind of exploding with the heat. I shut down the stove and put a wet tissue over the cooker. By then my mom woke up and comes to see what happened. She is surprised to see me and totally upset she forgot the beans cooking. She thanks me and feels embarrassed. She has no clue we’re just dreaming and I also don’t want to enlighten her today, so I tell her I just arrived, it’s late and I go to sleep and we talk next day, okay? She finds all weird but as I go to the room and close the door she doesn’t insist. I then think about trying once more to jump to the woods but I wake up again. Sh*t!

      4:40 GMT

      Trying to do the RPG task III and meeting Nighthawk instead
      After writing my failed attempts I go back to sleep and try to enter lucid again. This time I am facing a mirror and my warrior suit is on, my weapons on my hands and I plunge into a mirror portal totally focused on the RPG task. When I open my eyes on the other side I feel totally crushed, no woods. I’m at a modern house, like a loft studio but really huge. There’s people around a table, like a family and friends and I see Nighthawk. I guess subconscious today won me or maybe he summoned me.
      This is a dream version of his house and family. His mom, dad, brothers and sisters are there. He spots me and puts his arm around my shoulders and tells me to walk with him. Ok. We go upstairs and we sit on a couch – I actually sit on his lap – and we start making out. Then I put my hand under his shirt and he has a really weird reaction, saying he is putting some medicine on his skin and I shouldn’t touch it. He even says the name of the medicine and I’m like “Who cares, we’re dreaming!”. I guess he doesn’t know that. I get bored with his talk about the active component of this medicine and lose connection to this dream.


      Girl stoned in Iran
      Then I find myself in what seems to be Iran. Some women all dressed up and maked-up (but with scarfs over their heads) are bringing boxes of stones to some table. They look shattered and angry. Then a lot of men are gathering around and I feel sick when I realise what’s about to happen. These women are friends and family of the girl who is going to be stoned and I think this is the biggest torture of all, that they have to prepare it all. A little young girl is actually so upset that she throws a small stone towards some guys who are looking eager for what’s coming. Then the older ladies grab her in urgency or she would also be punished severely for that.
      Then a teenage girl dressed in aqua-green with beautiful light brown hair and the most sad and profound eyes is coming to the centre of the “stage”. I am just watching, like hovering around in spirit and no one really sees me. Except her: she extends her arms to me, looks deeply in my eyes, like begging for help and I feel totally broken. I hold her hands and send her all my love and tell her not to be afraid, that she will soon be free. She feels a bit comforted and sings a very sad song.


      6:15 GMT

      Meeting Nighthawk II
      I am back in the house where I met Nighthawk previously. I meet him again and as we move around this place I see how big it really is – it connects with a larger facility with artists’ studios and workshops. Artists and engineers are all working together on some project connecting agriculture and art. It’s bizarre. I pass in front of 3 furnaces which are being open on that exact moment to put something inside or take something out, but I don’t get to see what. I just see that some guy suffers minor burns in his face when a flame hits him.
      Nighthawk takes me again to some private area and he asks me what did really happen in that shared lucid dream he doesn’t recall. I ask him back if he really doesn’t remember and he insists on the "no". He sits on a sofa and asks me embarrassed if we “pleased each other” and I find that such a ridiculous euphemism. I say “If we had sex? No, but it was close enough.” He said “I thought so.” Then he pulls me closer and puts his hands on my hips and I put my hands on his shoulders.


      7:55 GMT – Wake up

      Updated 09-09-2011 at 10:46 PM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid
    4. 29 Sep: Visiting Japan and Dinosaurs extinction (TotY)

      by , 10-01-2010 at 12:42 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING PRECOG

      I know it is a bit late to start doing the tasks of the year, but I managed to finalise the task of the month of September after just first attempt of doing TotM, so I decided to go for the bigger challenge. I sill have 3 months till end of the year. If I manage one time travel per week, I can make it If not, at least it was a good try.


      22:00 GMT – Sleep

      Visiting Japan
      More dream stuff related to my incoming trip to Japan. I’m in a hostel room with 4 bunk beds and I am staying in the lower bed on the bunk bed on the right side of the room. It’s not the best bed in the world, but I’m tired so anything goes. I think I am writing my dreams on paper DJ and I feel a bit cold cause I cover myself with a blanket.
      Still, I am apparently not yet going to sleep or just waking up, because soon I am up and walking around the hostel. Lots of young people around. I am joining a group who is going on an excursion to the mountains but first i go back to the room to pick my toothbrush and something warmer to wear. I meet them at a bus stop just outside by a road and while we wait for some bus they start telling stories about their experiences in Japan. One guy says we’re not longer on tornado season but that it might happen that we get caught by one, especially in this particular area where we are. I wonder if he means a typhoon. I see what seems to be a ticket machine and I pass a card in front of a window which recognised it and makes a bip sign. Then we’re on top of the mountain and I am using this large public restroom. There’s so much crowd around. I’m looking for a toilet, but all seem to be occupied. This area of the restroom is extremely dark and I open one door of a toilet that seems to be free but when I put my hand in the dark trying to find my way there, I grope some lady who’s inside. She doesn’t complain though and I just close the door and give up. When I go out I pass by lots and lots of tourists of all nationalities and I hear these American black ladies mentioning very amused something about the size of the penis of men – I guess Japanese men vs African men?


      2:45 GMT

      Dinosaurs extinction (task of the year)
      I’m at my late grandma’s house which is now much bigger and works as a family house but also as guesthouse. There’s lots of people staying there, including my friend Hugo with whom I cross in the hallway. I think I was biking and just arrived. My family (uncles and aunts) are gathered around the table in the kitchen and call me to join them, but I want to go to the toilet first (still...). I pee but don’t feel any relieve, so I try to pee again and it is so realistic I just realise I might be peeing in bed in RL! Because of this I become lucid. I wonder if I should go to the RL toilet, but I decide that can wait, now I must enjoy lucidity and make good use of it.
      I go out through the toilet window and it is dark outside. As I think about what to do, I go down a road and pass by some houses. I meet dogs barking and 2 or 3 come to me and look intimidating. It’s a dream, ok, but still if they bite it might hurt, so I decide to lift of. Then they started jumping and doing something that also annoys me a lot in dreams – no matter how high I fly, they always jump that much higher too. I decide this has to stop. It’s my dream! And dogs or whatever will not jump higher than what is normal in RL. I am the only one here with extraordinary powers, ok? And it works, I see them jumping down there, no longer coming even close to where I am floating. As I go higher I meet this girl, standing on a electricity line and she starts talking to me. I recognise her as the girlfriend of one of my friends . One of those who ruined my friendship with the guy because of her jealous of our relationship. So I decide to tell her she doesn’t need to feel jealous or insecure about my friendship with her boyfriend, that I have no romantic interest on him and that I’m tired of losing friends because of possessive and jealous girls like her. I was a bit harsh but she totally understood and smiled. I told her to excuse me but that this was a lucid dream for me and I had other things to do. She said ok and I lifted even higher. It could now see the sun rising on the hills in front and I also could see a train passing nearby. No time for summoning mirrors so I decide o jump on the train and use the movement and impact as a quick to enter another dream.
      I think about the task of the year (tasks of the month are done already) and wish to go see how the dinosaurs got extinct. I jump with eyes closed and when I open them I’m on some forest/jungle environment. I see high grass, dense foliage. The weather is hot and moist and the light is golden. I hear dinosaurs’ sounds at some distance and decide to explore this world. As I go through the forest I then spot what seems to be a little man with a conic hat. Man? He looks like a gnome, he is short and round and he is totally focused on his work – I then see cultivated fields and realise he is farming. I think I totally screwed this task and for a while think if I should jump again and try something different. I then pass by some cottage-like houses in the middle of the woods and find a crossroad. I decide to continue to explore and I end up finding a city! It looks modern in all senses, but little details are different. All buildings are in stone and metal. They remind me Gaudi’s architecture, with organic shapes and so on. I see no cars and people wear really simple clothes in shades of green and brown. I am totally shocked when I see a few ladies passing by with huge white moustaches. The rest looks totally normal, as if I am in Vienna or some other European capital with beautiful stone buildings. Then I see some banners of some museum, like Natural History museum and I feel curious and follow the banners indications. I pass over a canal, under an arch and arrive at this inner square where there’s a huge bunker like building with more banners announcing a very special exhibition – a temporary zoo actually. I decide to go see it, but it is really early morning and it is not open yet. There’s already people waiting by the door and I am impatient – I fear I will lose lucidity if I just stay here waiting. So I rub my hands and walk around. They finally open the door, but we still need to wait in the lobby. I think “Why do I have to wait? It’s my dream isn’t it?” But I don’t want to interfere too much or I will start projecting too obviously and the dream will not be surprising any more. So I decide to push it a little bit, by encouraging the DCs to invade the place so I can also enter it amidst the crowd. And they do! They push away the guy who’s keeping the entrance and we go along this hallway and then we must go down some stairs. Before going down the stairs I peek over to what is down there and I see the first enclosures with the first animals. To my surprise the first one holds a couple of what might be Neanderthals. They are being attended by the zoo-keepers when the first tourists/observers are already lining up against the glass wall that encircles them. The Neanderthal lady is kinda sleepy and lies down. A tourist pervert starts taking pictures of her genitals. She is actually quite hot, for a Neanderthal.
      Then the second enclosure has a live T-Rex! Oh, finally a dinosaur!!! So it wasn’t totally wasted time. The T-Rex is quite small though, maybe twice the height of a human being. Either is a youngster or a degenerate midget T-Rex. I decide to go downstairs to see the rest of the dinosaurs behind the glass walls. But hen I arrive down there the zoo/museum people have put some covers blocking the view as they finalised all preparations for the visits to start. Gosh, so disappointing! But I use that time to reflect on the dream and realise in my version of the extinction of the dinosaurs, human beings were the cause of their extinction, through invasion of their natural habitat. I sit down with some ladies around the table and by now my lucidity drops to about 10% and all gets confusing and disappears.

      [On waking up, I told the story to my boyfriend and he said I must secretly be one of those religious people who believe dinosaurs and men coexisted. Actually I think some non-religious people also defend that idea based on archeological findings. My interpretation is more from an environmentalist point of view: dinosaurs and neanderthal’s got extinct – of course it had to be us!]

      6:30 GMT

      Fragments
      - Some colourful food, I think cookies, in pink and reddish colour. It is hot spicy and I wonder what they are made off. Found out they were made with some species of exotic poisonous ants. I feel sorry for the ants.
      - I am staying on some kind of resort. The main building is quite strange with some impossible staircases. If it was some years or months ago this would disturb me,but now I just find it so cool. I fly or jump to keep going up or down, so who cares abou broken, incomplete stairs or stairs that lead nowhere or turn back from where they were coming. Now it just looks fascinating. I go to the terrace of this building, which is covered in gravel. It has a fantastic view to one side and direct contact with the sea on the other. The sky is a bit grey but it is warm weather and I decide to try the water. It is also warm but the current is to strong and I get out really soon after. It was a longer and interesting dream, but I forgot on waking up.

      8:00 GMT – Wake up
    5. 28 Sep: Stalking Björk (again) and lots of nonsense

      by , 09-30-2010 at 11:08 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING PRECOG

      22:30 GMT – Sleep

      Lecture on a park
      On a train, remember speaking French and think I was on my way to some meeting. I got lucid and got out of the train. I start flying but lucidity is weak and I don’t remember any tasks. I just enjoy the beautiful blue sky. Then gravity starts pulling me down and I hate when that happens. I remember I am dreaming and I think that I should try to solve this issue once and for all, of gravity pulling me down on a dream. So I focus on the fact that I am dreaming and that there is no gravity and therefore no reason to be pulled down. I start going up instead and I make an effort to really record this on my mind so it doesn’t happen again. (But I’m not sure it will work 100%)
      Then lucidity gets a bit blurred and my thoughts get confusing.
      I think about levels and then I am on some terrace or whatever place, and have a black jacket on my hands with emblems on, with numbers relatively to levels of achievement. It has something to do with mastering the levels of flying or dream control in general. And I think it’s cool but won’t really wear that jacket. Then on the back it has some emblem about organic farming and I find that totally unrelated. Then a lady arrives – she looks Iranian or well... middle eastern. She says she is very happy that I could come to the meeting but at the same time she is disappointed no one else appeared.
      I wonder if she’ll cancel this meeting, but instead she says she will do her presentation only to me and so she can be more thorough. Then I realise we’re sitting on my bed. She starts her lecture but she is just reading some booklet of which she gives me a copy. I have hard time following what she is saying, but it is something about natural and protected areas and using the resources sustainably. I smile as if I am totally following. Then my boyfriend appears and joins us. It’s his lunch time. The lady continues without interruption but now I realise my bed is in the middle of a park. This park is inside some fenced area and there’s a guard at the gate. My boyfriend then spots his boss at the gate. We wonder what he wants. The lady now stops her conversation and says she wants to offer the man something to eat. She goes to the left to get something and comes back with a raw fish in her right hand. By now, the boss is already inside the perimeter but the guard is holding him back for some checks before allowing him to go further. As he sees the lady with the fish coming towards him, he looks at us with an enquiring and totally surprised face, like asking WTF!? I just shrug my shoulders.


      1:30 GMT

      Stalking Björk (again...)
      I’m meeting a small group on some terrace table in front of a coffee shop. It’s on a pitoresque town, with stone paved roads. I am bored and instead of sitting with them, I grab some kind of skate that actually looks like a stool on wheels and decide to skate down the road, which curves to the left and keeps getting ever more inclined. But as I gain speed, somehow I don’t want to keep going down. There’s something keeping me in this upper side of town (something I was dreaming previously, but don’t recall). So I stop, grab the stool and go up on foot. Then I arrive at the street where the terrace was and on the opposite side of the road there’s a kind of square, not paved, in front of some wall of a castle. There’s also an arch to enter the castle, which is what I was planning to do, but on my way there, when crossing the square, I see lots of kids gathered and some performances of artists, like jugglers. I get caught by this kind of theatre being performed by... I think cats, but I’m not sure.... dressed up in costumes I remember thinking how the hell the tamer managed the animals to do that so perfectly and I think probably with lots of suffering and mistreatment to the animals. But the kids are loving. I take some pictures and then two kids ask me to take pictures of them. I agree and ask how they want it. They say they want the view that his on my back now – a port or quay by the sea. I take picture of one and then the other. Remember the reflex of the sun on the lens. Then I hear singing and recognise the song and the voice of Björk. I go check it out and find Björk singing on top of some platform around a lighthouse or some similar tower building. There’s only half a dozen people stopping to listen to her and she looks so tanned! It looks like she was just having beach vacation and decided to sing for whoever was passing, but I don’t know. I sing along and when it’s over I approach this platform because I would like to say hello to her and because the clapping of the audience was so disappointing I feel she would like to meet some fan to lift her up. But she is already surrounded by people from her staff – so it wasn’t a casual show! One lady blocks my way and I grab her arm to really make her understand I wanna talk to Björk – OK!!! My hands are greasy and she looks a bit disgusted. I wonder why I’m greasy but tell her it’s not dirty oil, but some baby oil I put on my skin to moisturize (?) I finally get to her and congratulate her and start being a total nagging fan – which I would never do, but I think I was somewhat aware I was dreaming and felt no constraints. She is first totally ignoring me. She enters a trailer but leaves the door open so I also go inside. It’s a huge trailer. There’s a bunch of guys hanging around, doing video editing and sound checks – an entire team that probably worked for her. She enters a separate room, I assume it is her room or a changing room. But she also leaves the door open. And she hasn’t yet told me to shut up or go away, so I keep going. I don’t want to invade her privacy though, so I stay outside this room, sitting on the floor, by the side of the door. I bombard her with all sorts of questions and opinions, like saying she doesn’t look so good so tanned. Then she finally breaks the ice, asking me if I know anything about some hospital and I actually now something because my grandma uses to go there, so we end up discussing hospital location and treatments. Because of this, when I finally enter the room, she is lying in bed and she is has transformed into my grandmother . Then she turns into a giant poached egg. Then I wake up.

      3:40 GMT

      Random mix of unrelated stuff
      Going down some circular stairs down some kind of well to go meet someone and help with something. I realise I am inside a mine. As I reach some floor level crossed by huge pipes, there’s a quake which shakes down everything, and displaces some rocks and some of the pipes. People who were on downer levels come up and everybody decides to evacuate as it isn’t safe to stay there any longer. As we approach the surface, we open an hatch and we meet this guard on some control post who is guarding the entrance to the area. He tells us there’s no reason to worry, that everything is ok, just a minor quake, but we prefer to play safe and decide to make a break and go to this area on the left – a building – where we can eat something and rest for a while. At that moment I look to the sky and two police flying saucers pass by – like police cars, with the police lettering and red lights flashing, but in a flying saucer version. They seem to be on a hurry, maybe chasing some criminal on some other flying saucer?
      We cross a road and enter this building that looks like a mall, with revolving doors. Inside there are shower facilities and we all go for a shower before anything else. In the beginning we’re all in the same bathroom, men and women and some guy hands me over shampoo, but everybody’s dressed. First I say I’m not going to take a shower, but he insists and I just wash my hair – always with clothes on! Then I overhear one of the girls talking to a guy about considering living an alternative life style and I cannot help to tell her to talk to some other girl of the group who is obviously kinda hippie, thinking she might give her some advice. Then I look throught the window, admire some trees outside and spot an animal on some branch. I say “Look, an hedgehog on that tree!”, but something isn’t right and the others also notice. Hedgehogs don’t climb trees. I know that, but I’m sure what I saw was an hedgehog, so I go outside to prove my point. All I can find is some squirrel. He is cute but I’m sure not what I saw before. I spot some walnuts on the ground and think about throwing it at the squirrel, but then I realise he is not going to catch it and I might indeed hurt him if I try. So I give up and as I walk away I find a table with doll houses on top. They are from a lady artisan who makes them and is exhibiting them on open air. I am amazed at the details and beauty of the houses but then stumble on one whose miniature parquet floor is totally lifted on air – I try to fix it and as a result the whole house collapses. The lady is luckily surrounded by people and doesn’t see me.


      Fragment
      My hair is longer and I am sitting with another girl in front of my guru. He is giving us some instructions regarding the current practice we’re doing. I make some funny face and my guru asks me if I disagree with something, to which I reply no.


      6:10 GMT

      Changing clothes
      I’m on some large room with white long benches around, against the wall, like a cloakroom. The door is open but still I am trying to change clothes quickly. I see a corridor outside and realise this is inside some large building. I want to change pants but they are so tight, even my underwear comes off. Precisely when some people - among which I recognise my father - are just passing by in the corridor. Luckily they are not paying attention to what goes on inside the room. I decide to simply continue undressing and dressing. Strangely my panties have now enlarged with all the pulling and twisting from my changing acrobatics. I try wearing some new pants and they don't fir, so I grab a new skirt I brought and wear it – it also is huge, like twice normal size. I think I need to ask my mother what happened, because she was the last person who washed these clothes!

      Encounters at a canteen
      On a gathering of activists and farmers, there’s a guy in his 50s with a son about my age and they don’t stop looking at me. On lunch time at a canteen they sit in the table right in front of mine. My mom who’s also present notices the 2 guys interest and comes to join me. I realise she is digging the 50 year-old guy and I play along to help her. But e just exchange smiles and they never get up and come talk to us. After lunch I am packing all my stuff really well on my backpack to leave – I have mp3, camera, laptop and all the necessary plugs and cables, plus a book and whatever... I take ages to fit all in the backpack and that’s when the guy (the older) decides to talk. He tells me he is a rice producer and asks me if I know Alfredo (yeah, I do) because he is his neighbour. Then he also asks me if I am aware of the GM rice issue and I smile thinking “Why of course!” but he doesn’t give me a chance to talk, so he keeps going. He is totally furious that his project of organic rainfed rice was totally discouraged by the government while they support chemically and flooded rice and even GM rice. He concludes that this world is upside down and I agree, but decided not to speak.
      Then I spot Mónica onthe opposite side of this room and go there but then notice she is with her mom. Her mom takes her to a nearby window and shows her something which is outside. I hear their conversation. “Oh mom, I can’t believe it! It’s for surfing? I want it so badly! I want it! Thank you so much!” Apparently her mother just gave her some ridiculously expensive gift – I wonder if it’s a surfing board and since when she does sports? Then she turns but she doesn’t see me. Instead she goes talk to some lady who’s leaving and asks her if she can come along. The lady replies she would of course invite her, but she is with their guru on a private visit, as a friend and he is not expecting anyone else to join. Surprisingly then, the guru actually drops by saying he really needs to use the toilet. He doesn’t look so happy and even I say hi to him, but he does not reply. I find that odd, since he is always so kind and thoughtful. Mónica is clearly happy to see him and says to the other lady that he looks so well! I wonder why she says this, because to me he is clearly not looking so well.


      7:30 GMT – Wake up


      PRECOG explanation:
      On this morning my mom came to visit me. I was coincidentally wearing the panties from my dream but was wearing a different skirt. When she arrived she was bringing me a bag of clothes she had washed and ironed, including that new skirt. I just put it over the bed to sort it out later when my mom notices I have a big spot on the skirt I am wearing. We’re late to go out so I just grab the skirt on the bed and dress it. Already outside I realise I’m wearing the exact same thing I was wearing on the dream – luckily it suffered no accident and all is with normal size. I don’t know why I have such meaningless precog dreams, but fortunately once in a while I also have precogs that are actually interesting.
    6. 23 Sep: Life and death and other horrors

      by , 09-27-2010 at 09:40 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING PRECOG


      23:00 GMT – Sleep

      Preparing travel
      I’m organizing something, like a travel and comparing different places/venues. I’m on a tall building and then I’m looking through the window because there’s something going on down there on the street.

      Kids dancing
      I’m with my mom and she’s helping me out with something. We go out and when arriving at her building’s door, a bunch of kids from school next door are putting some show on (actually rehearsing it) in the square in front of school. They are dancing samba in pairs. Strangely my younger cousin J. Is among them, although by now he is already too old for this, but I still see him as a kid. He sees us and feels embarrassed that we also see him.

      Vanity
      I’m going out with some group of colleagues from school. I see myself in a mirror and I look really cute, with short hair and a blue scarf on my head. Still I take some time to adjust the scarf several times to be just perfect.

      3:20 GMT

      Scary grandma’s house
      I’m with mom at my paternal grandma’s house. We’re taking clothes from the clothesline outside. The weather is changing rapidly and really dark clouds are gathering in the sky above us. It gets really dark as night. My mom points to the bell tower close by, where we see this really creepy dark figure and we comment that maybe he’s some shadow, reflection but also that this place has always been a bit scary – we’re always seeing dark figures and feeling “presences” here. There’s another girl in the house and then a car also arrives and a guy comes out of it. Don’t remember what happens then.


      Life and death situations on the mountains
      I’m watching this reporter (like live on TV) in a pick up going down some dangerous road, with a cliff on his left side and I think he is not measuring the danger as he drives with only on hand at too high speed for the conditions of that road. Then of course he is thrown off the road, live on TV and everybody thinks he fell down the cliff, but then I’m transported into the place of the action and I realise he was incredibly lucky as the truck got stuck below on some rocks and we was able to get out and escape. Then I also realise he is with his wife and two kids on the truck and I am even more shocked at his irresponsibility.
      As I help them climb the cliff and we’re on top of it on the road, we are caught by a flood. It’s not yet too violent, but I see a bus being dragged by the water down the road and I also see this black baby girl in the middle of the way. I just have time to grab her and get her out of the way of the bus. She is so cute and I feel that this family I also just helped will adopt her in the nearby future. Then the kid in my arms becomes just a baby head (although perfectly alive) and I think about that being odd (but not enough to become lucid).


      Cat’s guts out
      I’m at some hotel room with friends, just settling in. We are reading this place’s rules and it says in summer we must use an outside common toilet instead of the room’s own toilet. We wonder why and think maybe in summer with the heat, it gets smelly and that’s why they advise to use the outside one.
      Anyway I go to the toilet and my cat is there. He doesn’t seem well. First he pukes and then his head’s skin starts to open from his left eye, leaving his skull and eyeball exposed. I try to keep it closed but it keeps opening more and more. I’m starting to freak out. Then pus is coming out. Then when the ripped skin is already down his back, his internal organs start bloating and coming out. Still the cat is moving, not looking healthy but also not dying. I somehow don’t accept that this is really happening so another healthy version of the cat appears and
      I see the two together and realise I’m dreaming. I feel relieved. Then I think about what to do with lucidity and stupidly I wake up.

      6:30 GMT – Wake up
    7. 22 Sep: Shrink to atom size, reverse gravity and meeting my guru

      by , 09-24-2010 at 11:25 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING PRECOG


      23:20 GMT – Sleep

      Fragment
      I’m on some meeting and I am extracting energy from both my surroundings and the instructor who is talking.

      2:20 GMT

      Business fair
      I’m on Mercado da Ribeira (a market in Lisbon). There’s some kind of fair going on and I see my friend Alfredo there, talking to other people. I also need to talk to him. I wave at him and he makes some sign that we’ll talk later. I’m behind a desk and showing some samples of some aromatic butter-like substance, in different colours and odours. Two foreign visitors are enjoying the smell of a lavender-butter when by my left side appears my most recent ex-boss. She tells them something in a very rude way. I don’t remember what, but included the word “shit”. They are shocked at her manners. She admits she is a bit stressed but doesn’t think she said anything inappropriate. While she waits for their reaction or answer, she goes away meet this other group of people where my friend is included and the two guys open up with me. I tell them she used to be my boss and that they have no idea... They showed solidarity with me but I tell them they should still close the deal with her, despite everything.

      Crazy kid and vacation at resort
      I’m on some tall building. As I entered and climbed the stairs I noticed it is practically empty, with just a few neighbours on the lower floors. I go to some top floor, looking for something or someone and enter an apartment, which I sense like mine or a place where I’m temporarily staying. It is totally empty, but my cat is there. Some windows are open and I rush to close it (because of the cat). Then some friends arrive and with them is an evil kid. He keeps playing with a knife and saying he is going downstairs and kill the neighbours. I tell him to behave and he also threatens me with the knife. Now I’m pissed and I confess I fear for cat, who is vulnerable around a deranged kid like this. I use all my best psychology skills to change his attitude but he improves just a little bit.
      Then I talk to my friends and we’re exchanging stories about tourists in trouble – like these guys who stayed at this sleezy hotel with a code to enter the room instead of key (which in itself is ok) but then the owner of the hotel would sell the codes to some mafia guys who would kidnapped people in the middle of the night, for human trafficking. Not nice. I remember I will be travelling again soon and hope I don’t happen to stay in such places.
      Then we all go outside and I realise we’re on some type of touristic area. One of the friends needs to go to her apart-hotel to get something and I see we’re in some kind of beach resort.


      5:15 GMT

      Marrying a cousin
      I’m on some room similar to my older room at mom’s house and lots of family members are there, including my mom and my cousin R. I don’t recall the entire conversation but my family is convinced we should marry – me and my cousin. They say it’s not a consensual decision, that they are not happy about it, but considering the circumstances it is the only solution. I wonder what the hell justifies that? I’m not pregnant of him or anything. When I was a kid I had a crush on him, but that was it. My cousin is looking at me, anxious for my answer and I find this all very odd.
      I walk around the room and find my Tanto (a Japanese dagger) broken on the floor – the grip separated from the blade. I fix it, upset that someone had broken it and I turn to my family and tell them no. I don’t want to marry my cousin, I don’t have any reasons to do so. Why are they even considering such a stupid thing?


      My mom pregnant
      Later I talk to my mom alone and she tells me she is worried. She recovered 3 of the 4kgs she had lost with her new diet. She says its not because of overeating, she thinks she is pregnant. I’m totally surprised, but the “worst” is yet to come. I ask who would be the father of the child and she tells me it’s my father. Then I’m totally shocked – they are separated for more than 10 years now and there’s no way they can get along ever again. How the hell this happened? She says she does not plan to get back with him, that it was just an accident and that’s why she is freaking out.

      Shrink to atom size
      I’m on a bathtub and decide to do RC. I realise I’m dreaming and get lucid. I decide to shrink to atom size. I close my eyes, because I decided to try it this way when I was awake. It is kind of working, I feel myself shrinking. When I open my eyes I’m about the size of a human finger. I see two huge people approaching and we're on this enormous room (bathroom) with an endless table by my right side, that looks like a tall platform on top of really high columns. I close my eyes again and continue shrinking but this time I almost wake up and have to make an effort to stay “on”. When I try to open my eyes I feel my “real” eyes opening and have to stop not to wake up. Then, when I feel I’m more stable on the dream, I open my eyes slowly, but all I see is darkness. I no longer have body or shape, I’m just consciousness in a dark void. All I see is very faint clusters of white dots, like distant stars or galaxies. It actually looks like outerspace, but I try not to judge the result. Probably the atomic world looks like outerspace.

      My guru’s mandala fortress and reversed gravity
      Then I close my eyes again and think of next task (this one set by me). When I open my eyes I am on some house. I decide to summon a portal, like the blue water-like portal I saw some days ago in a dream. But I fail to do so. Not even a ripple in the time-space continuum. So I stick to the mirror approach. I find a wardrobe with a mirror on the door and I think I want to go meet my guru. Then I cross the mirror and find myself on this green area facing a huge wall, like a fortress, in front of me. I see some guy at the top of the wall and decide to fly to there. For some reason it is not easy and something is keeping me from flying to the top. I am blocked like 1 meter away from the top but this guy gives me a hand and pulls me inside.
      Once inside I see this plateau, with lush gardens and some pretty houses. There’s a group of people around some table I presume are his students and I ask them where can I find our guru. A hippie like blond bearded guy tells me he will be at the casern at 7 o’clock. I wonder where is that and what 7 o’clock is he referring: mine or this place’s? I think tht maybe my guru is not asleep at this moment and therefore I cannot meet him, but I’m not sure if it works that way – Buddhist teachers are said to be always available to the students, always!

      [On awaking I looked for the meaning of casern and found this: In fortification, caserns are little rooms, lodgments, or apartments, erected between the ramparts and the houses of fortified towns, or even on the ramparts themselves; to serve as lodgings for the soldiers of the garrison. This confirms I was indeed in a fortress.]
      Then these guys just leave to go somewhere and leave me alone. I decide I can’t wait until 7:00, if it’s mine 7:00 because by then I will be waking up. I look around and find a second wall in the centre of this fortified town – a fortress within a fortress - and decide to go there. This time I manage to fly directly to the top of it.
      I find a second group of people – more of his students – also around a table on some lovely terrace. They are eating and I decide to join them. Once again I ask for our guru, but this time, from my right side a head leans forward and I see my teacher’s face looking at me, surprised. Hi say hi and ask if it’s ok that I looked for him. He says “Sure, why not!” But then it’s hard to chat with him, with all these people around and someone between us. Anyway I had prepared something to say but I feel maybe I should wait for him to talk to me. Then he starts joking around – his face transforms. First I think – could he be just a DC I’m projecting, but his signature was so real. Then when the transformation ends, he has the face of Mao-Tse Tung. I laugh, because that’s something he would definitely do to jerk around with us. I ask why he changed his look to Mao and then he changes again and he’s now an old lady with white hair, glasses and granny’s clothes. He is just being himself.
      Then everybody gets up and my guru flies away. He actually went down to the lower level fortress. From up there, where we are, it looks like a giant green lush valley. Others start following him, although a bit clumsily. I fly to join them and my guru is telling his students how they need to improve their flying skills. Some of them are really at basic level. Managed to jump down here, but lit off, no way. So I show off by flying graciously around, as a dolphin swimming in the ocean. I flip, I swirl, I go up and down, pass by them high speed. Oh, ego.... then I realise above us is not the sky but very high ceiling, kilometres high ceiling. I go there and put my feet on it, trying to walk on it like a fly.
      Then I remember the reversed gravity trick, which I never tried and decide to put it t test. I think about the guys down there who might get hurt, but at least my guru will for sure be just fine. Still I make a wish that nobody gets hurt and I say “reversed gravity” and all of the people and objects that were down below start to fall to the ceiling and I laugh, as it is quite amusing. Then I reverse it again.
      I go back to the ground and everybody is dispersing, to practice on their own, I guess. I find my guru sitting under a tree and go meet him. He asks me why I am so persistent in following him? What do I want from him? Do I want to marry him? I laugh and say no. I tell him with this exact words “No, I don’t want to marry you, I’m simply hungry and thirsty (of knowledge)” and I feel it in my heart with 100% conviction. He smiles, like I just gave the right answer and he tells me not be so impatient. He tells me things will happen on due time and that I had to understand that I am already having privileged access to him and that I should think about that. Then he gets up and goes away and I wake up.


      6:55 GMT – Wake up

      (I guess at 7 a.m. he needed to be at the casern )

      Updated 09-24-2010 at 11:29 PM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , dream fragment , task of the month
    8. 19 Sep: Dad and elevator task

      by , 09-24-2010 at 06:07 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING PRECOG

      24:00 GMT – sleep

      Dad talk
      My grandfather passes by and I smile at him as I don’t find anything to say to him. I feel sad about it.
      Then I’m with my dad discussing practical stuff.
      He says if he goes to work on Friday he stays. Then he can go earlier on Monday with me to the doctor. Then I ask what does he mean, as there’s a weekend between (don’t want him to stay for the weekend...) and he says it is just better for him, he uses time better by staying with me instead of just meeting me on monday.
      Then we hear some mambo music and we try to dance it., although it is not really working out well. My dad asks “Shouldn’t you know this stuff?” and I reply sarcastically “Off course, because if one day the world ends while I’m here, at least I know how to mambo, which is crucial:” But I know he is refering to my dance classes, years ago.


      4:30 GMT

      Elevator task
      Still with my dad, at what used to be our home. All totally normal, but then the building starts falling forward (a recurrent dream I had for many years). He freaks out but I think it must be a dream. Then all happens in slow motion and I tell him not to worry, because it is just a dream, but he doesn’t believe me. As the building falls, I feel cool, I do RC and conclude beyond doubts it is a dream.
      When the building is on the ground, I get out through some window and find myself landing over a wooden table in the middle of some wood. Over there there are some other girls, one is Vera and the others are some british friends of her. My father is still hanging around and I try that he understands it’s just a dream. I feel euphoric and start singing and dancing on the table. He thinks I’m crazy and disappears. The girls join me and we put up quite a show. But then I see our reflexes on some glass and we are all enormously fat. But I don’t allow this trick of the mind to distract me. I’m lucid and I must make good use of it. I think about the tasks. What is there for me to do?
      Oh, the elevator! I summon an elevator and turn to find it there, in the middle of the grass. It is green, the brand is Otis (just like the elevator of my old home), it has one button to open the sliding doors and inside lots of buttons for about 6 floors. But I had previously decided (awake) I would not push any specific floor as I wanted to be surprised. And I was, the elevator started moving without me touching anything. Strangely enough, it doesn’t go up or down, it just goes sideways, like a car. It drives me through the woods and gets into a road. Traffic around me, we pass under the Lisbon aqueduct. I feel a bit disappointed with the outcome, but the task implies not to control where it goes, but just to see where it takes me, so I comply. I almost lose lucidity here, almost wake up, but continue. The elevator stops at some car park and by my side is a 50’s looking car with some black guy inside, leaning through his window. He flirts with me and asks me out. I say no thanks. Then I realise I’m two girls – the other me is also a 50’s looking girl. We smile at each other and we tell him we have other type of interests in life. We’re both thinking of LDs. He doesn’t understand, thinks we’re crazy, maybe gay, maybe belonging to some cult. Everybody around us is dressing like the 50s and then the dream starts fading away.


      8:30 GMT – Wake up


      PRECOG explanation:
      - just today my father called me and was with this strange conversation about his plans to start working (he is retired, he was mentioning some personal projects he's working on) on fridays or mondays or whatever (I was distracted and didn't really grasp it) and that this way he can be with me on weekends and help me out with some project I'm working on. I freaked out thinking I have to have him over every weekend! I love him, but no.

      Updated 09-24-2010 at 06:11 PM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , task of the month
    9. 16 Sep: Dream within a dream, kame hames, Nighthawk’s dream

      by , 09-23-2010 at 11:33 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING

      I had a sleepless night (work reasons) on the 15th Sep (about 36 hours without sleeping), so I went to bed early in the evening of the 16th to compensate.
      I have something important to tell about what I’ve experienced on these days when I was sick, traveling and not sleeping much. During these days, although dream recall was kind of shitty, waking life was incredible, because many of the dreams I had dreamt a few days before manifested during this time and led me to strange places. I will write about it later.


      19:50 GMT – Sleep

      Nothing...

      3:00 GMT

      Dream within a dream
      I was looking at a bus – probably to get inside it, when in front of my eyes this image started to form - a guru I know that passed away years ago was sitting in front of me. He had his face painted and had a hat and ornaments. The vision slowly became more clear and detailed until I became part of it – I had passed into another dream (and when it ended I went back to the same place of the previous dream).
      This guru was surrounded by lamas and I sat in front of him. I didn’t know what he was doing, some kind of ritual I could not follow. But in the end he gets up – he is gigantic, I mean he was 2 mts tall when he was alive and I am now sitting at his feet. He approached me, leaned forward and with a big warm smile he told me something like this wasn’t really a dream and then he told me something important about inspiration that unfortunately I can’t remember well. It was a very clear and profound message that did inspire me for something, but I can’t recall. Then the vision started to fade and I was back in the initial dream, confused if I was actually awake having a vision or dreaming within a dream.


      Holographic advertising
      I was in the future, walking the street and being bombarded by 3D holographic advertisement – if you think advertising now is intrusive... wait to see that one! Not only this advertisement was 3D, if you decided to interact with it, it would actually become semi-solid and you could touch the holographic objects, sense their texture, shape and weight. It was also possible to manipulate these holograms on this particular advertising, so just for fun I transformed this object that was being announced into a pair of boobs and put them in the hands of my boyfriend who was by my side. I laughed, then I picked it up again and designed a heart-shaped box, with a beautiful reticulated lid. I gave it to him again and as he grabbed it, inside it appeared a symbolic representation of whatever he keeps in the centre of his own heart. For me this was like a revelation and I thought that this would be a great instrument to find out what’s inside people’s hearts – made a mental note to myself on this “extraction” technique. Of course, by now I was lucid.

      6:00 GMT

      Nothing

      7:00 GMT

      Kame hames batlle
      I was inside a garage in some villa at dusk when I realise I am dreaming. Made some stunts, like jumping from wall to wall, to celebrate the return of lucid! Then decided to get out and fly somewhere. As I hover houses and trees deciding what to do, I see on the horizon this Dragonball character – I think it’s Cell [did a search on the web] and he is preparing to kame hame me. This settled my priorities immediately: I tried to create a fireball in my hands (which I have failed to do so far). I see only a tiny spark arising and just as if it was a fire, I blow it to make it bigger. That’s the only way I manage to do it and I throw the fireball at him. He throws one at me, which I can easily get away from. But he immediately throws another and another and I am still struggling to fire another one, so I decide I am not ready for this fight and run away. Actually I wake up briefly.


      Entering Nighthawk’s dream
      I force myself into dream again and immediately enter a new dream. On this dream I am just awaking at my grandma’s house. I was apparently sharing the bed with my cousin C. who is still asleep. I go out for a few seconds and when I come back in the room, the bed is now smaller and already tide up (no cousin sleeping on it) and I realise it’s a dream. The lucidity is faint so I rub my hands and look at all details, trying to vivify it. I lose and gain lucidity a few times until it becomes strong. Then I decide I’ll use it to meet Nighthawk. I close the bedroom door and wish to enter his dream by crossing the door.
      When I open the door I see a different house on the other side. I enter it. The look is totally different – while my dream was whitish and cold, this one is yellowish and warm. I step on a corridor and right in front there’s an open door to another division. I see his mother and lots of family members gathered around, listening to her. I believe it’s some kind of family reunion. Then I go to my right and I find another room, a quiet room where I see Nighthawk sitting on a couch with his grandmother. I have this impression that I’ve seen this dream before...
      He is sitting with her and it is clear that she is a safe harbour, a big source of love and care. I feel bad to interrupt his nice dream, but I need to say I’m there, although very gently not to disturb too much. I pass quietly through the back of the couch and as I do it, his grandma says “Is it you xxxx (my name)?” I am caught by surprise, how does she know my name? But then who looks back it is actually him. I never get to see her face and I realise she is just his DC and is expressing his own words. He looked at me, with his eyes full of emotion but also a bit confused. Like, this is a recurrent dream and I’m not usually part of it, so what the hell was I doing there?
      I get to his side, I bend over against the couch side arm and gently ask him if he is lucid. He seems confused, looks sleepy or dizzy. I hold his hand, he is warm and I am freezing cold. I cuddle his arm gently. And then he says a bit spaced out “Oh, we kissed, didn’t we?” He was slowly connecting the dots, but the dream was faint and losing sense rapidly. He was still looking very sleepy and he lay down on the sofa (the granny was now gone) and the dream started to disappear. I didn’t lose lucidity but I was kicked out to another dream and I found myself in the middle of a very busy street, somewhere in some Mediterranean country, almost being hit by the traffic. I decided to try to go meet him again on some other dream of his, and wished it as I tried to teleport me there, with no success. Anyway I knew it was time to wake up and got to work, so I called it a day (or a night ).


      7:00 GMT – wake up

      Updated 09-09-2011 at 10:50 PM by 34880 (correcting spelling mistakes)

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid
    10. 11 Sep: Burning stuff, detachment and harassment

      by , 09-23-2010 at 09:48 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING

      I have been sick, which totally knocked out my dream recollection for almost a week. Then I had to travel to Belgium and slowly recovered my dreams but had no possibility to write them down on dreamviews. Still, I have a lot to tell: I accomplished the monthly tasks of September, among other personal achievements. Will try to publish these past 10 days' dreams in slots, not to spam the DJ page.


      23:45 GMT – Sleep

      Body-guarding
      I save a lady twice. First someone puts her on a truck over some train tracks and I just get her out at the last minute. Later we’re on a boat and I see a guy approaching her with a gun on his hand. He’s someone she knows and she trust him but I sound the alarm and just avert another murder attempt.

      Incinerating a landscape
      I’m hovering some natural landscape with a big lake or sea and there’s some nasty stuff contaminating the waters. I’m shooting beams from my hands into land and water that blow up the whole thing. I see it catching fire, feel very disturbed with this destruction but I know that it’s for a greater good.

      5:30 GMT

      Burning attachments
      My house was on top of some cliff and there was really bad storm going on, landslides and so on. The house broke into pieces, little by little and we lost everything. First I cried for the loss, but then I focused on the fact that we (me and family) were still alive and that was the most precious possession, so I started feeling this comfy feeling of peace of mind and liberation.
      I walk to a nearby house that is still standing, with the few possessions I managed to rescue and inside I find this guy watching TV as if nothing happened. I feel he is responsible for what happened, I ask him why and despite already having felt inner peace, right now I feel an anger arising and I attack him. He is totally unaffected as if my punches don’t even touch him. At the same time I feel this mix of anger and attraction to him. He finally speaks and with much sorrow in his eyes he says my pain and anger are destroying him and then he transforms into a kind of androgynous fairy in dark clothes which slowly freezes like a block of ice. I realise my anger is killing him and I then feel compassion and love and slowly it unfreezes from that state. I then feel immerse in a sea of loving kindness and detachment, I transform. I now have a helmet and flamethrowers in my hands and with a bizarre floating dance, we both throw fire at the rest of this house and possessions saved and feel totally liberated as I watch them burn.


      6:30 GMT

      Artistic kid
      I see these amazing drawings of a kid – he makes beautiful nudes – and I want to know more about him. Then I see his life from above (as a movie) and see him in highschool, hanging around with his friends. Nothing really interesting, he’s just a kid with talent – and I think, there are so many out there!

      Harassment
      I am taking a shower at my mom’s place and as I come out of the bathtub my uncle C. enters the bathroom. I feel a bit surprised and upset, I just had time to pull a towel and cover myself. What is he doing here? He is wearing a monk’s robes but he is also hitting on me. I try to avoid him but it’s not easy, he corners me. Luckily my aunt also comes and gives me an opportunity to escape. Then there’s a shift in the dream. I pass into a city landscape and think I’m now in another dream and got rid of him, but he followed me here. He is just behind me, trying to catch me again but by then I am lucid and decide to fly away to leave him behind. I fly a little bit and see this gorgeous cityscape – really lovely, large sidewalks, monumental buildings and bridges, a long garden with red flower carpet. As I hover the flower carpet I lose the dream and wake up.

      7:45 GMT – wake up

      Updated 09-23-2010 at 09:51 AM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , dream fragment
    11. 10 Sep: India, birthday party and Town of Denn!

      by , 09-10-2010 at 05:23 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING

      23:10 – Sleep

      Again in India
      I’m with my parents on a house looking over a hill and we see a crowd of men outside very agitated. They are manifesting, angry about something. Not at us, but the fact they are so close is a bit worrisome. We fear they might start a riot and starts damaging our home.
      We go outside try to understand what’s going on. I understand their situation and agree with their demands. I also shout some words of support and my father tells me to shut up – what am I thinking? I ask if he doesn’t agree and yes, of course, but these guys should do something about it in a peaceful and diplomatic way, not with riots. My parents decide to leave and not stay there anymore, predicting problems.
      We then go through an earth road by the side of the river and I see beautiful Indian girls in their Saris and boys flirting them. Then I go through a succession of images from India, buddhist monasteries and so on.


      3:30 GMT

      Town of Denn
      I’m going down a hill and find myself on this earth road by the edge of a large crater (more like a canyon). On my back and on the other side of the crater I see buildings destroyed by rockets and bombs. I then realise there are men hiding behind some broken windows, with guns and realise I’m in a war scenario. I decide to do a RC. I realise I’m dreaming and feel no fear. This time I remember the tasks I have to accomplish (Hooray!) Which one I do first? For some reason I didn’t feel like taking an elevator, so I decide to shrink to the atomic level. I do my best to shrink, but all I manage is to reduce maybe 10 cms. Damn. Continued trying and didn’t reduce size. Not to lose lucidity in vain, I decide to do the RPG task and decide to jump on the crater and use it as a portal for the RPG dream. I close my eyes on the jump and when feel my feet on the ground I open my eyes and I’m there!
      At first I found it a bit different from what was supposed. I mean, the sky was bright blue, the houses of the village were all white and there was a general sense was of a happy sunny place. In front of me, downhill, I could see beautiful planes and hay stacks. On my left I saw these streets with white houses aligned downhill. On my back there was the main entrance to the village – through an arch, leading to a higher hill on top of which there was this big white building that at first looked like a church, but it had banners and flags and was for sure a fortress or castle. On my right also downhill there was an alignment of stands covered by tents, of what looked like a medieval fair. This fair stretched to the main entrance of the village with a few open air stands. That’s when I realised: this is the town of Denn, although in my version it looks a lot like the traditional villages from the Alentejo province in the South of Portugal.
      Lots of people were moving around, all dressed in medieval clothes and I approached one stand to see what they were selling. I have no idea what it was, but now in retrospective, it might have been arrows – they had boxes full of these pointy metallic spikes with what seemed to be tiny dragon wings on their back tip. Don’t know. Then I saw a mirror on one stand and decided to see myself there. That’s when I realised I had my normal look, wearing an aquamarine dress. No! I had to enter my character, so I looked for a more private place with a mirror to change myself. I entered the main village street, right behind the stands. There was a kind of tunnel on my left, between houses, leading to an inner court and because there was nobody around, I went inside and found a room that by chance was full of “antiques” – I guess in this context, they were useful working instruments - including a large mirror. The light was very dim, but I could see my reflexion quite well so I started changing my look to my warrior me. It all turned out quite well, but for some reason My face also changed and I was now a red haired girl with a long braid and tiny brown eyes. I was cute, but a bit annoyed of not looking more like myself – I wanted black hair and big brown eyes. It took me some time, but I finally got it. Meanwhile I think I lost very precious time. I need to be less obsessed about how I look and just keep going.
      At this point a guy comes in and I realise he is the king! And he is totally drunk. I wonder what is a king doing drunk in such a place, that looks like the backrooms of the servants – oh, maybe I actually know...
      He starts hitting on me, saying he never saw me before but that I’m hot. I avoid him, moving around the room and he is insisting, trying to catch me. He thinks that my running around is my way to arouse him. I feel tired of this, want to go look for the tavern, when a group of people come inside all worried. They were looking for the king, afraid he was doing something stupid (as he was). As they try to grab him and take him away, I decide to sneak out before they start asking questions.
      I go deeper into a hallway I find connecting to other deeper rooms and I think I found some kind of kitchen – everybody is so busy carrying stuff from one place to the other, it’s very hot and there are these servant boys taking a rest in a very dark corner with a few wooden benches.
      I sit with them for a while, no one ask me questions as they are either too busy or just plain tired, but then I wake up.


      Birthday party
      I tried going back to the dream but ended up on a different one although with similarities. I looked in a mirror and I was dressed medieval, but this time with beautiful jewels, like a queen or princess. I was in a country house in the province of Alentejo – it was the house of a friend with whom I’m starting a business. Today is my birthday (it really is) and I am having my party at his home. My mom and a fiend are there, my dad, a guy I almost dated in high-school and Riverstone and Nighthawk are also there.
      This guy from high-school brought me a load of presents. I don’t immediately open them and take them to a room. Everybody is gathered in the living room. We are chatting and eating and then my friend future partner is discouraging me from following our initial plans. He says maybe I should do it on my own and not be his partner. I am totally surprised and disappointed because until now he showed no hesitations whatsoever and all the reasons he is giving me are just BS. I try to change his mind but he just asks if I can wait, because he needs to take a shower and we continue later. I say ok and he leaves. I am chatting with someone else when he appears, all naked, in front of all the guests, totally cool about it. My mom and her friend turn away their faces, laughing embarassed. He was on his way to the shower but he forgot something and found totally natural to go butt naked to get it.
      Then I decide to get my gifts from the other room and Riverstone follows me. He is already drunk and going through a jealous phase – he grabs one of the gift package and starts guessing what’s inside, starts tearing away the package and I get upset and tell him to drop it – it’s my gifts, I open it and if he has any problems that some guy is covering me in gifts it’s because he is a child. I take the gifts to the living room and start opening them. I notice that Nighthawk is also mildly embarrassed that he is not the one giving me the best or the most presents and I think “God, so frivolous! This is not a competition.”
      I don’t remember what were the gifts but then we all got drunk or drugged or just sleepy, because I woke up later on in the bedroom, and everybody was sleeping on the floor. I woke up people and they left. I stayed only with the guys. No monkey business, we just staid sharing whatever trip we were experiencing. My sweater was totally sweat and I went to the toilet to change it when I saw myself in the mirror and noticed that my make up was also all messed up, so the trip must have been good.


      5:40 GMT - wake up

      Updated 09-10-2010 at 05:26 PM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid
    12. 9 Sep: encounters with friends, hacking a building and groceries

      by , 09-10-2010 at 04:07 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING RPG

      23:50 GMT – Sleep

      Lucid imagery and tasting words
      The first sleep is always hard to recall but when I woke up from this I knew for sure I had been lucid. I think I fell asleep focused on the hypnagogic imagery and didn’t really enter a dream, was just staying lucid observing the sequence of images and then I tasted words. [I’ve heard of people tasting colours, but this was new for me]. Unfortunately I can only recall this but not describe the actual sensation.

      2:20 GMT

      Library encounter
      I am at this roundabout close to my mom’s home and I discover a new library opened right there. I recall when I was in high school and spent so much good time in the municipal library and decided to go inside check the conditions and maybe start coming frequently. I check the novelties shelf in the entrance, I pick some book and sit on a couch. I notice this guy JF, whom I know from college and haven’t seen in a while (although we communicate by email), but decide not to go to him and wait to see if he sees me. He comes to say hi, we talk a bit and then he asks me if I’m staying longer, because he is leaving and could give me a ride.
      I say I’m still staying as I just arrived, but then he ask if I came on foot and points out that it is starting to rain and I’m not prepared for rain. I look down and I’m wearing skirt and sabrinas and the weather is definitely becoming nastier. So I say, ok you’re right, I accept the ride.
      But when I looked down I also saw I had pantyhose on one leg but not on the other and they were also quite dirty. What the hell! So as we leave the building, I first sneak behind the entry desk and try to take off the pantyhose. He comes back looking for me and finds me with skirt up, pantyhose down and trying to adjust my underwear who also got out of place with this tricky move. Embarrassing, but he just does his best to ignore and tells me I forgot money on a table in front of the couch I was sitting on. I did? So I go back and find a lot of coins on the table. Think it was not so much and shouldn’t really care about it, but he says that it doesn’t matter, it is my money, I should take it. Ok, ok. As I start putting it in my purse, the coins transformed into pieces of fruit and in the end my purse was full of fruit salad.


      Hacking a building
      There’s an announcement about the day with no cars (happens every year) and immediately I see the roads with no cars and a family cycling around the neighbourhood. They go up a ramp and I follow them – until now I was just watching but now I materialize. On top of this ramp is actually a dead end so I wonder where they disappeared into. When I turn back, this is no longer a street but actually a closed precinct, like the backrooms of some public or governmental facility. Then I find myself with 2 other friends and we make a challenge to each other – break in, do the tour of the building and leave without a trace. There are vigilance cameras everywhere, so it won’t be easy. As soon as I leave this room, the hallway has a camera and I know it is just a matter of time until a guard appears. I just have enough time to break in the door at the end of the hallway, my friends follow me and we close and block the door when the guard is about to catch us. Now we face a new challenge as this room has no other exit. We decide to go through a vent and get out on the control room, where the guards should be, but since they are still trying to break in the first room we blocked, now we can hack their computers and tapes and delete all recordings about our little adventure. As my two others friends are deleting the files, my attention goes to a corner where there is a basket full of teddy bears. I wonder what they are doing there and can’t resist to go through them, looking for one that is cuter and eventually take it with me, but in the end, they are all cute but none really stands out so I leave them, wondering why guards need teddy bears.
      The door of this control room is locked electronically – so nobody enters or exits, while the guards are out – but my friends broke in the code and tell me a sequence we’ll need to insert on this door and a next door we will find. But hey, I’m distracted with toys, so I don’t recall the numbers. Fortunately my friends are better concentrated and remember it for me. When we unlock all the doors, we find ourselves moving to an entrance lobby with visitors and a kid notices we’re coming out of a restricted access area and asks us if we should be there. I smile at her and tell her no, that we’re hackers but we didn’t do any harm, we were just having a bit of fun and ask her to keep a secret.


      Buddha Neo
      Someone tells me “Did you know there’s a secret short movie that is a crossover of Little Buddha and Matrix?” No, I don’t know about that!!! So then I’m showed this amazing film with Keanu Reeves playing Neo (of course) and then he finds the truth inside the truth and becomes the Buddha (he also played Little Buddha) and the Buddha hacks the Matrix and kicks some asses, but also sits to meditate as Neo. Weird stuff but awesomely cool. I would love to see that movie!


      4:45 GMT

      A very quiet friend
      I am at a lobby of some building with my dad, close to a desk. We’re waiting for someone or something, but it’s totally deserted. He makes some remarks how he feels uncomfortable with these places, especially when some weird people comes by – better beware of your purse - like... for example this guy that is coming in now! I wonder why he says that, it’s just my good friend H.L. from Estonia, whom I don’t see for a few years. I don’t mention this to him and simply go to my friend, also to scare my dad a little. He recognizes me and smiles but when I hug him he is distant and not really replying the hug. Then a blond girl with a kid appears and I wonder if they are together. Ok, but that’s no reason to be cold towards a friend. The girl finds this corner for kids, with a little castle for kids to play inside, and she leaves the kid there. I try to break the ice by saying how I would have loved to have one of those when I was a kid, but all I had was chairs, blankets and a lot of imagination. But she also doesn’t reply.


      Sharing memories from Brussels
      I’m in the middle of the street opening a letter that just arrived in my mailbox and I’m surprised to see it’s a renewal card for going to the cinema with discount, in Brussels! I don’t live in Brussels for more than 3 years and I also wonder how they got my new address.
      Coincidentally, I see this lady which I know from tv, she is an actress and I know she lived in Brussels to and misses it a lot. So I start talking to her showing her the card and asking if she knows what’s about. She was totally surprised and didn’t first understand what I wanted. But as she looks closer to the card, she knows what I mean and makes a big smile. I tell her I also lived in Brussels and we start walking together exchanging stories about this city. It’s so rare to find someone who lived there and actually loved it, everybody always complains about the weather. As we walk we pass by this abandoned lot and I notice a lot of garbage, a few vegetable gardens and 2 dogs who soon start fighting. When I look again to my way, we encounter a friend of hers who’s waiting her with a car, we say goodbye and she leaves.


      Buying groceries
      I’m shopping on this little town grocery shop some food for me and taking to some group I’m hosting. I buy some tomatoes, eggs and I see these amazing carrots that are labelled organic but cost only 90 cts/kg. I find too cheap and ask the grocer if these are locally produced, by some villager or so. He confirms and goes about saying how amazing these carrots are, delicious and that he misses when all vegetables were so tasty and not these plastic chemical-filled things we eat nowadays. He starts talking about the wonders of organic farming and I smile. I want to tell him he his preaching to a converted, but he is now turning to some other clients, some villagers who are asking something about his ham. The grocer goes to the backroom and comes back with a piece of ham. He cuts bits for others to taste. But first he tastes it itself in a very ritualised manner and I realise the guy is a gourmet an totally obsessed about quality food. Before he also offers me some ham and then I have to explain why I’m vegetarian I turn away and pretend to shop some more stuff.


      7:10 GMT – Wake up

      Updated 09-10-2010 at 06:55 PM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , dream fragment
    13. 7 Sep: a portal and a long lucid (both wasted)

      by , 09-08-2010 at 10:20 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING

      In general, these last days I have been recalling fewer dreams and totally missing good opportunities when they arise, but we all go through these stupid phases, I guess.


      23:20 GMT – Sleep

      Can’t really recall a dream, but I woke up with obsessive thoughts about dream control and the serial dreaming RPG tasks, so either I was dreaming something related to that or not at all and felt frustrated on waking up.

      3:58 GMT

      Random fragments
      I’m with a group of kids, brothers and sisters and apparently we are very famous. There’s a huge group of fans stalking us and we just have time to hide in some house. Inside there’s a maid who becomes our friend and keeps our location secret. For some reason we stay there for the night and it is absolutely imperative that nobody find us there.
      Then I am on some balcony trying to disentangle something (?)
      Then I’m on top of a skyscraper in N.Y. I feel a bit of vertigo.
      Then I am with some blond guy and we are making a pact to help each other keep some secret only to ourselves.


      4:30 GMT

      From a train to a slaughterhouse
      I’m on a train station platform and from inside a train a friend calls me, says it is last call for this train and if I’m not getting there immediately I’ll have to go on the next. I don’t know where we’re going, but I hop in. I sit and realise that in the seat in front are my friend R., L. and some other person. They are bragging about their dreams. One of them says she can easily use the train ride to snooze a little and will surely come up with at least 2 lucid dreams. Initially I feel envious, but I shudder this feeling, don't want to give in to envy and just ignore them. I look through the window and I see bulls on some field. Half-lucid I start thinking which animal suffers the worst: the bull that roams free his entire life and is then slowly tortured and bleed to death in a bullfighting arena or a cow that lives an entirely miserable existence of pain in some factory farm but then dies supposedly quicker? My doubt lies now in the effectiveness of stunners that are used to leave the animals unconscious before slaughter. So I find myself in a slaughterhouse holding one of such devices to test it. I thought about trying it on myself, but I felt a bit scared of what I would feel, so I just test it on an apple – not a very clever idea, it just gets some burning marks on it. [chicken!]

      A portal
      I’m on some house of an old couple and their son. We’re in the middle of an empty room and there’s a portal open in the centre of the room. It just appeared out of nowhere. As it shines and waves in the air, in tones of blue, like water, we wonder what it is and if it’s dangerous to cross it and what it is on the other side. The boy gets behind it and throws something across it in our direction. It was like a piece of garbage. Instead of crossing, it just stays there, suspended in the portal, but it performs a strange mystical dance and then becomes a perfect circle form. Then I don't remember much, but I had no will or courage to actually cross it and think I just left this room and house and continued dreaming outside. [idiot!]

      Buddhists and new agers
      I'm in this foreign country and my mom came to visit me and I decide to show her around. I’m dressed in orange, top and long skirt and with my purple hat. I tell her lots of monks and Buddhist teachers are also in the city at the moment, for some gathering. We see a group of people waiting for a bus on the other side of the road and I tell her “See over there, it’s Mathieu Ricard with some other Tibetan Buddhist monk”. A bit further we pass by another group of monks, and I tell her “And see, look who’s in the middle of these monks, it’s Tich Nhat Hanh.”
      Then we see a large entrance to some place, like a garage, not entirely inviting, but lots of new agers gathered there. They invite us in, they are eating what seems to be lentils and vegetables, so we join them. After the meal they behave a bit childish, like when they start doing this clapping hand game I used to play in camps with other kids.


      5:30 GMT

      Alone in the city
      I am again in this foreign city and I know my mom is visiting, although not with me at the moment. I know it is quite far from home and I wonder how she enjoyed the flight. I feel that flying is becoming quite normal to me and I wonder if I’ll ever be afraid of flying. Then it occurs to me that maybe if I fly to Nepal, I might feel scared because lots of planes fall in that area as their flying companies are not so safe.
      While I think about all this I am entering a building, following two other girls who enter a public toilet. It is quite big with large mirrors on the wall over the sinks. The girls are mocking me or something, but I ignore them. I go to the mirror and I spend a lot of time there, looking at something in my face as I continue thinking. Because I’m abstracted, the dream transforms and I am now on top of a hill sitting with a guy and a girl on a few steps and the mirror transformed into a glass wall by my left side. Through it I can see a road down the hill and a city on the other side of the road.
      Me and this guy and girl are so packed together (don’t know way, as there’s lots of space around) and the guy is flirting me thinking I’m interested.
      But I couldn’t care less, I get up and decide to move. I go downhill and cross the street. From there I see than on the side of this little hill, there's a bigger mountain with a forest and old houses in the horizon, outside the city and for a moment I consider going there. But hesitated, and decided to just fly around the city. I am lucid but honestly can’t really tell when it started (think it was gradual, from the moment I moved away from this couple of friends).
      For a moment I find myself inside a house with a bunch of other people and I change clothes – now I wear a sexy transparent black shirt. Then I’m outside again and I’m a bit distracted and a car almost hits me. I pause on the sidewalk for a while, just looking to the sky and the buildings around. It’s all so luminous. Then I see lots of jets lifting off and I have this impression there’s a lot of rich business people on this city. The jets lift off, one after another, there’s maybe an airport nearby. But then they start behaving strangely, like they are not flying in a straight line, but a bit randomly and then they transform into giant metal birds, with colourful painted wings.
      A Russian guy wakes me up from my mesmerisation and tells me he will drive this car, which is parked right by my side and I’m sitting on the sidewalk, so he’s just warning me to get out the way. He is a bit rude, but he is actually concerned about my safety and I feel he is a nice guy. He is a driver, not the owner of the car.
      Then I cross the street on the pedestrian walkway. I didn’t look to see if it was green for pedestrians and a wall of cars comes in my direction from both sides. But I am not afraid. As they approach I think "cars keep coming at me but this is my dream and they can’t hurt me, I’ll be like Moises opening the red sea and crossing safely to the other side". It didn’t quite happen that way. It just happened that the cars would pass in front of me or in my back without ever colliding with me, very elegantly. That was nice, but not awesome, so I stay there and decide the cars will lift in the air and freeze and make a wall of cars. This time I point my hand to them to make it happen, but all it happens is that they started levitating, but not with the desired effect. I think “Oh crap, I really suck at this control thing.”, but it wasn’t that bad - at least it was a very sucessful levitation of cars.
      Then for some irrational “reason” when I am in the sidewalk I decide I’m not over with this gimmick yet and I walk a bit further down the road until I find a spot that for "some reason” looks good. There I decide to send a purple light ray – actually more like a laser, hard to explain - to the ground, marking an invisible line where the cars will create this wave or wall of cars, when they reach it. But by this time, the traffic diminished a lot. It’s already dawn and I also realised there’s very few people on the street. A guy coming out from a building – looks like a bank – just saw me sending out “laser beams” and with his eyes wide open he freezes on the sidewalk and moves back inside. I can’t believe he is afraid of me!
      I lean on some raised flowerbed outside a building, waiting for some car to pass, but nothing! They totally disappeared. Now I feel pissed. I was sure this time it would work! Then I feel so incredibly lonely, as if I was the only one of my kind in the world - nobody with whom to share my reality and my tricks. Then my cat appears by my side and I hug him, but I don’t feel much better.

      [Then I felt totally disappointed that I didn’t remember to do any of the tasks I was supposed to do!]

      7:15 GMT – Wake up

      Updated 09-08-2010 at 10:34 PM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , dream fragment
    14. 5 Sep: fragments, giant cats and lucid hot date

      by , 09-06-2010 at 05:56 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING


      22:50 GMT – Sleep

      Game like dream. Can’t recall content.

      0:00 GMT

      Bus ride to village in distress
      Just as two nights before (the hovercraft ride dream), I am on a bus with more people crossing dangerous mountain roads with dangerous manoeuvres from the driver and we almost fall down a cliff. We arrive at this remote village in a valley, surrounded by woods. There was some kind of catastrophe there and the basic services are disrupted. More madness is expected soon, riots and violence. A muscled guy comes and starts orienting us. For some reason he seems to befriend me more than the rest of the group. We come to help and we evaluate the situation sitting on a picnic table outside: we try to evaluate how much food, water and other essential goods there are and how long they’ll last and we realise it won’t last more than 4 or 5 days. Because everything is torn apart, I see this village name plate half covered by debris and the only letters remaining visible say “...have ...fun...” I think this is highly ironic.


      Fragment
      I’m inside a house, with a big window facing the street. It has something like an advertisement stick on the window and I’m trying to read it on reverse, when some guy outside knocks on the window. He wants to speak to me and seems a bit angry. I exit the place.

      Mourning a dying man
      I’m now entering a room at my neighbour C. house. Her dad is extremely sick (in some kind of coma) and people are all gathered around him, mourning him, as if he was already dead. Strangely, some of my cousins and even my late grand-grandmother are also there, even if they don’t belong to this family or are alive at all. I feel this is very uncomfortable and wonder if they have no hopes that he gets better? On my way out I meet my dad and he says I have to be more loving towards him because one day he’ll also be lying dead like this guy. Sure, but I already know that, no point in stressing that out!


      2:30 GMT

      More details of a previous dream
      Regarding the mosque lucid dream I had had a few nights before, someone comes in this dream to tell me it is actually surrounded by English-style gardens but doesn’t know anything about sacred stones, only that there was some stone-sculpture exhibition there and that a few days some people gathered there to celebrate some ceremony.

      I’m no dancer
      I’m on some place where it’s playing music and I feel like dancing. I actually think I’m doing ok, when more people join me. I can tell they are professional dancers and compared to them I’m just not good enough, but I’m having fun, so I don’t care. Then I realise I’m in the middle of some dance class final exam. The teacher comes to me and asks me “Do you think you danced well? and I say that on a professional level, of course not. Then she asks some other dancer “Do you think she danced well?” and he says no. Then she says she rests her case and turns her back on me, like outcasting me. I feel a bit upset. I mean, I know I am just an amateur, but my dancing is not that offensive to anybody’s eyes, no need to be so tough on me. Some fellow dancers show solidarity with me but in the end I say it’s ok, in fact she is right. Then I invite them to come along with me to a Vivaldi concert that will happen on some nearby auditorium.


      3:40 GMT

      A lucid hot date
      I’m with Nighthawk watching tv on the couch on a living room. At first we're apart from each other, but slowly we snuggle with each other, our noses are barely touching each other, we look in each other’s eyes and we kiss. He whispered “My god, it’s so good to kiss you.” and I smiled, my heart thumping. He says ”Marry me.” I don’t know what to say and I say it’s complicated. He knows, he gets up, determined about something. I don't stop him, but seconds later I decide to go after him. On the corridor I remember to do a reality check . I put my hand on the wall and it sinks. I get lucid and for the first time on a lucid dream I actually feel frustrated that it is just a dream but I still decide I want to see how this will go on.
      I find him on the next room with Riverstone, who is completely focused on something like a book and holding a cup of tea in his hand. I put my hand on the wall, I make a hole on it and I ask them “Do you know what this means?”. Riverstone looks totally disconnected and doesn’t react. Nighthawk has a misterious smile on his face and I don’t understand what goes on on his mind. I grab a piece of dissolved wall on my hand and pour it into Riverstone cup of tea telling him “This is just a fucking dream!”. He says I’m telling nonsense. I turn to Nighthawk and I say “He is always like this, he never believes me!”. Nighthawk, on the other hand, seems to be understanding exactly what I am talking about. Then he surprises me by replying “Well, I, on the other hand, know for sure this is damn real! I am really here with you!!! And I know we're dreaming!” Really? WOW! I was amazed.
      I ask him “How...?” and he continues saying that he doesn’t recall those many dreams, but he does recall a few once in a while and that this might be one of those he will remember. I tell him he must absolutely remember this one!
      At this point I realise that Riverstone is no longer with us. I turn to Nighthawk, absolutely thrilled and exhilarated with this totally lucid dream encounter. We smile and we kiss each other again, more passionately. We fall on the bed. I feel delighted with everything. Then his image starts to flicker and we realise he is losing lucidity and waking up. He says “Damn, not yet! I want to stay with you!” and I try to keep him there with me, grabbing him firmly. But he becomes just a blur, a shadow, until he totally disappears, like sand through my fingers. I find myself in this empty room, happy and sad at the same time. I sit on the floor and I stay there for a long time, hoping that he might re-enter the dream. But when I no longer feel the residues of his presence I decide there’s no point in staying longer, so I also wake up.


      5:00 GMT

      Excursion on the USA
      I’m with Riverstone on some excursion in the US. We’re on a bus. A pregnant lady is just sitting in front of us. We’re passing by N.Y. and Riverstone is screaming joyfully every times he sees a landmark he recognizes. Later we’re outside any city, on some road leading to some other totally different place. We find ourselves in a swamp area. We see alligators on water and for some strange reason there’s a black guy swimming bravely among them. I worry for the guy but also comment that is so funny to be seeing alligators as I just had some conversation with someone about alligators during the day.


      6:35 GMT

      Love letter
      I am again on a bus and some stupid guy/kid reads out loud a love letter I wrote to someone else. Although he doesn’t mention my name, he knows it’s mine and I believe everybody else will also know it’s mine. I wonder how he got it and feel terribly irritated. But instead of reacting, I just ignored him. I guessed this way I wouldn’t actually reveal myself and people would be in doubt. Only when the bus stops and we start coming out of it, I step on the guys passage and confront him with his action. I put my finger on his nose and make a threatening look and tell him something that scares him. He looks asian and familiar, but I have no clue who he actually is. He doesn’t like being threatened and tells me “Ok, ok. But why don’t you just tell the guy your feelings?” And I respond “But I did! What do you think that letter served for! I just wonder how you ended up with it in your hands.” He doesn’t confess.


      Camp of giant cats
      When we get out, we’re in some kind of camp and everybody starts smoking or is coughing. I comment it must be the lung cancer camp and the joke is not well received. Someone scolds me. We walk a bit further and I start to see lots of big houses, like an entire village and the most surprising of it is that I see giant cats looking behind them or inside them. Cool! I don’t kno if the cats are dangerous, but I start taking pictures of these amazing site.
      [inspired by the cat sanctuary of this guy in the US, that collects abandoned and wild cats and takes care of them in this lovely sanctuary with tiny houses for the cats, as a real village.It even as a church and a wall-mart.]

      8:30 GMT – Wake up

      Updated 09-09-2011 at 11:12 PM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , memorable , dream fragment
    15. 4 Sep: Jews and Palestinians, mystical encounters, lucid in Poland

      by , 09-06-2010 at 02:49 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID FALSE AWAKENING


      23:30 GMT – Sleep

      Mystical experience
      I think I fell asleep thinking about trying to have an O.B.E. I was lying on my back but think I fell asleep and got caught up between dream and waking state, I was sleeping, don’t remember being on any dream, I guess I didn’t feel any of the O.B.E. triggers so I just kind of entered this meditation state, focusing on my breathing. I was asleep but I could also feel my body and hear the external sounds. I wasn’t really fully lucid, but naturally I focused on body awareness. I felt an extreme discomfort and focused on that. I felt it multiplying. I can’t really explain what it was exactly that was multiplying, it just became multiple.

      2:30 GMT

      Visit to Jewish neighbourhood
      I’m in a Jewish neighbourhood in the middle-east. I’m foreigner and I am escorting a small group of tourists. They are jewish-portuguese. Among them is a young boy who sees this young girl in the middle of all these bearded men from this neighbourhood and asks her something in her language but with a very bad pronunciation. She also speaks Portuguese, as she is Portuguese descendant and replies in his language, to which he replies happily. But the family of the boy scolds him and insists he must train his Hebrew.

      Occupied land
      I am part of a group of observers on what seems to be Palestine. We are keeping an eye on the occupying army, seeing if they don’t commit abuses of human rights. On that day we follow closely two cases that could have ended badly. First, some kids entered a military off-limits area and they barely escaped being shot by militaries chasing them on a truck. Later, a couple with a small young girl are trying to evade from this occupied area and they pass over a concrete wall, when they are spotted by an helicopter right when they are about to break free. Luckily they find some big sewage pipes, leading underground and manage to escape. Nobody else knows about them anymore.
      At night I’m in a terrace, looking at the cityscape and the stars, hoping for the end of this violence and persecution.


      Mystical ceremony
      I then see in the sky and orb of light. I try to figure out what it is and decide I have to follow wherever it is going. I find myself entering a swamp on the outskirts of the city. As I go through the bushes, I find this open area and I see a gathering of enlightened beings and a few gurus. My main guru is taking part of some kind of wedding ceremony with his own mother. I have no idea why. Then another guru sees my enquiring look explains to me that it is only symbolic. That she has some important transmission to pass on to him, from a female tradition and to receive it, he has to symbolically marry her first.
      There’s some other students of these gurus around and I hear one asking this one guru if it’s true that they can enter our minds as they want. He responds in a joking way, saying “Of course, we're like the boogy man and we will haunt your dreams. So beware.”


      4:00 GMT

      Fairy and deity
      Me and Riverstone are by some lake, looks shallow, safe and pleasant, but we don’t dive until some guy appears – like a forest guard – and tells us is totally fine to go inside the water. The lake is actually composed of 4 lakes, connected with each other and with an island in their centre. I just wet my feet, feeling the water is warm and cozy but then I see a chameleon and it gets my attention. He is red but turning yellow as he approaches me. Then I find him amidst a bed of white flowers and he turns completely white. Then he actually transforms into a butterfly-like fairy, all white with little white orbs around it. As this fairy sits on a flower, a beautiful exotic lady, with dark skin (not black, but very tanned) – a deity? - comes hovering and blesses this fairy. I kind of receive her name on my mind but recall it very badly – something like Aedis Abba ???


      5:30 GMT

      Mystical insight
      Something about reincarnation and non-linear timeline. In the dream it was so clear and obvious but I couldn’t make sense of it to write it down.

      Wedding on an island and alien invasion
      I’m on an isolated island on some facilities carrying on some secret projects. Due to some failure, there’s an alien or whatever on the loose, that we failed to contain and it will start mayhem out there. Fortunately we’re on an island where nobody lives and we hope to contain it before it finds a way to go to mainland. I’m on a boat around the island and I cross another boat with a colleague of mine, also doing his round. Then I find there’s a bunch of people who entered the island illegally. I go check what is going on – it’s a bunch of rich kids who came on a private jet. A couple is marrying and they wanted to do something original, so they had this fucking great idea of sneaking secretly into this island without permission. I wondered how they manage to come without being seen, but since everybody is looking for the alien/monster, nobody was paying attention to that detail.
      Apparently they were already detected and a jeep with armed men are coming in their direction to evacuate them, but they see it and just run to the plane, managing to fly before being caught. Let’s just hope the “being” is not already with them!
      Then I go back to the facilities and I meet Ugly Betty with a boyfriend who came to say that the “being” escaped and the invasion started. Then she starts preparing her weapons, which apparently were slates with loving words on it??? (very effective, for sure...)


      Wounded dog on the road
      I’m on a car with my mom, who’s driving. We’re on a long road crossing vast planes, but we see a dog lying down in the middle of the road. We think he’s dead so my mom just moves around him, but I have decided not to ignore the animals and people who are potentially in need of help and not necessarily already dead. So I ask her to stop and I walk back to check on the dog. He is bleeding but he moves his head slightly. I feel such despair. I want to carry it to the car, but he is bigger than he looked and I’m afraid of hurting him even more. So, I’m deciding how to carry him, when I wake up.

      6:20 GMT

      Lucid in a Polish village
      I’m going out of a house, apparently trying to escape from being seen by some lady. I pass by these two guys sitting on a tractor. The youngest guy looks at me long and deeply and I find it strange. He seems so real! Then I get lucid. I think maybe this guy is not a DC but actually a dreamer and he also sensed that I was a dreamer. But I don’t go ask him, because meanwhile I kept moving and I left him behind. I realize I’m in this eastern-Europe like village. The roads are in stone, buildings are small and beautifully painted, 18th or 19th century like.
      But I look around at other people trying to find some other dreamers, trying to find a very distinctive mark that someone is not a DC. Just for fun I go around asking people how they are enjoying this dream. They couldn’t care less. But then from my left appears Andrzej, this polish guy I know. He looks damn real. I can’t say what it is, but I feel it. Maybe he is also a dreamer. Anyway, what is he doing here? I guess we’re maybe in Poland and that’s why he’s there.
      I ask him if he knows he is dreaming but he doesn’t react to the question, just asks me something else. I keep insisting and finally get his attention. I stop in front of a shop window and melt the glass, then a wall. He starts believing me and funny enough, some other person who was inside this shop gets amazed and apparently also goes lucid. But I didn’t know the person and she just disappeared, probably to explore her own lucid dream.
      My friend is lucid for what seems to be his first time. He is so excited that he starts becoming really focused on really small details, like reading a poster that is on some street light post, amazed with the detail. I have to snap him out of this fascination and tell him, details are good, but don’t focus too much on only one or you will lose lucidity fast. I drag him to the wall again and tell him to try dissolve it. I don’t know why I was so pushy on this, but I guess I wanted to keep him busy to prolong his state.
      He tries punching it and gets hurt. I tell him it’s not about brute force, that he has to imagine the wall is made of soft material that dissolves with touch. After trying a little bit he manages to leave a hand print on it, which is a good start. At this point is totally exhilarating and I tell “You know, there’s a bunch of people who do this often, and we organize groups and plan dream adventures together. Maybe if you could develop this capacity from now on you could join me, be one of my dream pals.”
      As we walk, we end up on some dark alley and I feel some bad vibes there and decide we should go somewhere else. But a few ugly looking guys are already enclosing us and I decide our only escape is lifting up, flying. But my friend is not yet skilled on that area. I decide to try to carry him but when I grab him he transforms into a glass of juice and everything starts becoming absurd.
      I did fly up and saw this kind of terrace with an entry door to some house only accessible by the air. It is a tiny place and I find inside a very needed black family, with lots of kids. They sleep all in one division. I feel a protective instinct towards them and go check if the kids are sleeping well. I cuddle them and they are now little back kittens. I wake up.


      7:30 GMT – Wake up
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