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    1. Friday, May 15

      by , 05-16-2020 at 05:16 AM
      Iím coming home to Momís after having left Melissaís. Ryanís car is backed into the driveway and I see him out front. I think I get mad and yell at him, causing an altercation. Iím still in my car and he is on foot, so I start driving after him. He sprints away, which I find funny, but I am genuinely trying to hit him. I think he is now gone and I am on foot and picking up some things he has left by a mailbox. Now, Iím in the house and at the table with Mom and some unknown dirty blond girl probably a few years older than me. I can tell that her personality is not all that attractive and somewhat prude and priggish. I think theyíre discussing legal matters regarding the situation and I canít tell if theyíre on my side or his.




      I am going to a Flowing Tide with the family. It seems to be in a room off of the main area of a casino or something. When we get in, the place is empty. I notice a sign saying that they open at 7 and at 8. I guess weíve just missed the 7 oíclock cutoff, but a female server lets us hang out while she cleans. This room has all of the tables and chairs pushed against the walls. I notice all the crumbs on them and on the dark carpet. One of the staff hesitates for a moment, looking it over, looking exhausted. Weíre now sitting, and Sage is here. Weíve both ordered beer. Mine is a pint of something autumnal? that is really not all that great. Sageís is a bomber of a dark/strong beer. I try it, needing two hands to lift the dark bottle, and it is good. It is bitter, but that seems to be the point, and I end up wishing I got this instead. The family is going on a hike after this, but Makayla and I have gone to the wrong spot. The correct spot was right above the Flowing Tide, but we went a little ways away (I think I drove). There is something about Makayla still wanting to do this hike and me just picking her up later. Iím trying to stick to the plan/just go with the flow, and this just seems like an inconvenience.




      I am in a bathtub with two men and two women around my age, all unfamiliar, all nude. I donít think there is any water in the tub, and itís also just big enough for us all. There seems to be some kind of glass partition around the tub, and the tub seems to be in a bar?room where there are other people. I think we can see out but they canít see in. I am touching one of the men now; his penis is thick but very short, not sticking up very far past his patch of pubic hair. I seem to be mostly pulling on the skin, and I donít think it feels that good for him. I touch the other now; his penis is a bit larger and I think I do a better job. Now, a new blond and slightly pudgy girl is here (and I think the others are gone). Iím still naked as she coats my flaccid penis in some black liquid and then sucks it off. I donít think I like her or this.




      Iím in bed with Melissa and weíre talking. She asks what kind of science? I like, and I tell her dreams, music, and space.
    2. Thursday, May 14

      by , 05-16-2020 at 05:14 AM
      Brittney is looking to rent a house with me since I think I have expressed that Iím looking. Sheís wasted no time, and we are pulling up at the house. This house looks more like a school building it is so large. There are two separate buildings, the smaller of which we are parking directly in front of. The main building is off to the left a bit. I think this one in front of the ~4 parking spaces must be a guest house. Both are of a darker brown wood, angular and modern but not gaudy. From this parking spot I can see up into a space in the main building. It looks like a giant pool room. The walls are an antique looking white stone and vast; the ceiling is thirty or so feet high. The far wall has a large mirror that reflects a chandelier. I am taken with it and take a quick picture. We now go inside to tour the place. There is a middle aged black lady wearing some kind of headwrap who has 1-2 boys and is still currently living here. This house has an absurd amount of rooms, but they are all decorated modestly. It is almost an odd juxtaposition to the opulence of the house itself. I begin looking at rooms more thoroughly. I notice a few bathtubs. One room has a circular nook and tub with currently drawn curtains, which I like. It seems this entire room is just for the bathtub. There is an area that looks like a hallway, except it dead ends at a wall with a small, square window.it is inclined at 10 degrees or so, yet there is a long, dark wood dining table. Intrigued at this, I pull a chair out to envision how this would or wouldnít work. I notice the lady watching me down at the other end and become self conscious, but sheís probably thinking itís good that Iím involved/invested. I know that she is going to bed soon (even though I think itís only around 9pm) so I quickly look at one more room (a bedroom with a walk-in closet and tub - almost like Dadís) and we leave. I think the plan is for it to be me, Melissa, Brittney, Carlos, and Kestlie, so the rent will be manageable.




      Iím on what looks like an apartment balcony with Laynie and I think Melissa and Laynieís mom. Laynieís baby is here too, only about six inches tall and playing around on Laynieís shoulder. Laynie is completely topless, which strikes no one as odd, if we even really notice. The kid goes to give me a high five and I raise my hand to where she canít possibly reach, then bring it to rest on Laynieís shoulder because it is the closest thing. I think for a second we both thought I almost set it on her breast and both make a jokingly relieved face.




      Iím up on a rocky outcropping on a hill, right at the crest of where a small river/stream becomes a sort of flume. It seems natural, but I think there are three different channels of stone. There are two other men here, somewhat older than me and Asian, I think. We are finding certain stones to send down the flume. These stones are tan and somewhat translucent (kind of a tan quartz) and they float. Iím breaking them off a larger section of stone, I think having more trouble finding the right ones than they are. I think they float down to a town and then do something. It seems dark out.
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    3. Wednesday, May 13

      by , 05-16-2020 at 05:11 AM
      I am in my bed at Momís. I am going to sleep or have been sleeping. I think Ryan lives here. He comes in here, and it is so dark that I barely see him but rather sense him. He exudes malevolent sarcasm as he says something to taunt me. He then leans over and kisses my arm, his lips sickeningly wet. Smiling as he thinks heís won, he leaves with another remark. Now I think it is the next day. I am going to covertly find some boxes, pack my things, and leave within the day.
      Tags: bed, kiss, moving, sleeping
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    4. Monday, May 11

      by , 05-16-2020 at 05:09 AM
      I am driving with Sage to see Tool in Arizona. I know I am going with her, but it looks like Iím in the car alone right now. The scenery is nothing immediately familiar to me, but it is the typical arid landscape I would expect. This two lane desert highway meanders through some scrub and brown hills. It is dim, but at one point dark. I drive past a silent scene of carnage. Strewn across the road is a creature (maybe a human?) that has suffered an attack on its head. There is a chunk missing and a trail of blood and remnants. Since there is a hill right nearby, I assume that whatever did this must be up there. It is light again, and I am looking at some dark rock outcroppings atop a hill. There are small farmhouses at the base of the hill and openings in the rock pile that look clearly inhabited by something. The openings are almost as large as the structures, and it freaks me out slightly that they exist so close together. I then realize that they are actually barns or sheds, but still donít like the thought. Only a little ways to the left, surrounded by some trees, is a house, still too close I think. I think we left at 4 pm, which Iím thinking will give us plenty of time (Iím thinking it takes 2-2 Ĺ hours to get there). We have arrived, a typical large indoor arena, and I think our seats are apart. I conclude that it shouldnít be too hard to find someone willing to switch. The place seems pretty full and all of the lights are still on. Iím telling Sage Iím sure theyíll open with ĎAenimaí (thinking of the Fear Inoculum tour) but itíd be cool if they surprised us with something like ĎFloodí (I think we were listening to that in the car - I remember seeing the dash display with the track time and hearing the intro).




      Iím in some house with some others, one of which is Krissy from work. There is also a child on the brown couch that might be mine.




      Iím looking at the full moon and watch as it looks like something is shot through it. The Ďsomethingí is small compared to the moon, but it leaves a trail of particles. I tell someone and think they donít believe me until it is publicly announced that the moon has been shot.
      Tags: driving, kid, moon, music
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    5. Sunday, May 10

      by , 05-13-2020 at 10:01 PM
      Iím going to go to Melissaís after work, I think for Valentineís day. After Iím done (not sure where) I walk to the house, which seems close. The house is very upscale, large, and with lots of stone. When I get inside I discover that all of the lights are out, so I figure everyone is sleeping. It was light outside but it is near pitch black inside. I start down a foyer or hallway, which is the only place with even a hint of natural light filtering in. I go through a living room and stumble into a couch, then use it to guide myself. Despite my slight miscalculation on the couch, I seem to know exactly where to go. Now, Iím in the backseat of a car in the garage here. Melissa is in the driverís seat, Alex in the passengerís. Iím thinking that theyíre just getting back from somewhere, but theyíre actually going out to see the sunset. The garage door is open and behind me I can see the sunset through some trees and houses. The sun looks halfway sunken on the horizon, shrouded in oranges, yellows, and thin clouds. I end up telling Melissa that I didnít bring an extra pair of clothes but that I might not worry about going to get some tonight since Iíll be going home in the morning. I tell her Iíve barely worn this shirt and that the shorts are fine too (*I think I am envisioning the same clothes I was wearing at her house yesterday). She makes a comment about the underwear still being the same. We are walking around this neighborhood and pass what looks like Scott with a much younger Shannon and I think a small dog. I end up at a swimming pool with an infant (about six months old and mine). Iím swimming at the shallow edge and the boy is up on the tile. Iím not being negligent though; I am watching him. There are about two women here, and heís playing with one of their iced drink Starbucks cups. I have him bring it to her and he does. Heís cute and weíre all laughing and smiling. He looks very similar to me as a child that age.
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    6. Saturday, May 9

      by , 05-13-2020 at 09:33 PM
      Melissa and I have had a baby. We are somewhere outside where there are a bunch of tents set up - like camping tents, but I think slightly bigger. I think all of these tents are for couples and their newborns. I also think this is the first time we get to see our kid. Sitting outside of the tent, the baby is revealed to me. When I first see her I cannot help but to grin and be filled with joy. She is chunky but very pretty, with fine, yellow hair. We have named her Makayla, and, in fact, she looks like both Makayla and myself as babies. She crawls around, smiling and laughing (it looks like sheís around six months old). She gets that same devious expression on her face that I sometimes get and it causes me to feel excited. ĎShe is spunkyí, I think, imagining the years to come. I play around with her, making her laugh, giving her kisses. I tell her jokes and I think she actually talks back (not 100% mature, but definitely too advanced for her age). Now, I am leaving to go to a Starbucks that is right by here to reheat a drink for Mom. I walk through some storefronts along a slightly winding paved area and donít notice anyone else out. Just as I come up on the Starbucks, I realize that I am not wearing a mask and that they may not take kindly to that here. Moreover and probably more importantly, I realize that I am completely naked. I become aware of my bare torso, backside, and penis juxtaposed against this setting. I wonder about the legality of this and then go back to get the coffee that Iíve forgotten anyway. I come back, this time clothed, but without the coffee. There are people wearing face masks and waiting, distanced from each other. The barista behind the counter sees me and goes to take my order, but I tell him I forgot something and Iíll be right back. Now, I am taking the coffee out of a microwave (not sure if itís in the Starbucks or not). It looks like a short sized cup of a tan colored coffee drink. There is ice in it, but I think it may also be hot? I try it and itís creamy and really not all that good. Mom is here, sitting on a long, brown leather couch. She takes the drink, tries it, and agrees with me. I am back with Melissa now and we are going to go home with our kid. I think about what life is going to be like now with a baby, specifically the nights.




      I am with Dad somewhere and heís talking about walking around some of the houses in this neighborhood (I think they are nice). Iím looking at one across the street right now. It is right next to the asphalt street and looks to be completely a glass curtain wall with vertical supports every ten feet or so. Right now it is mostly a reflection, so itís almost as if itís disguised, not there. Dad says he was walking by one and taking a picture and then he thought someone was about to come out and punch him - except it was just a woman? He says he offered to show her the pictures, that theyíre just scenery and nothing bad. I tell him I feel weird/bad about taking pictures sometimes, too. Dadís going to go for a walk right now and is offering for me to come. I look out and slightly to the right and see a woman walking up a slight ravine in a mostly green hillside.
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    7. Friday, May 8

      by , 05-11-2020 at 11:56 PM
      I am at Melissaís house (though this house looks nothing like it). Iím in a larger, open living room that I think is mostly barren except for a short, wooden shelf with a larger TV on it. I think itís off right now. The place seems somewhat dirty and doesnít have the feeling of a home. In here is her mom, someone unfamiliar, and a guy that looks like Ryan. He has those same drug-addled features, and I instantly dislike him. I think the other is the same, and, sadly, there is something a little off about her mom too. They all seem to be arguing about something dumb, and I sense that itís going to lead to a fight. Her mom starts talking to me for a while, but Iím eventually able to sneak away. I end up in a small kitchen with two counters, one at a diagonal to the other. Each has a sink, and I recognize the one facing the TV as the one her mom likes to use. Iím washing my hands in the other, notice Iíve left a small pool on the tan tile, and leave it there. I figure I can go this way to sneak off to Melissaís room, and head that way. Suddenly, an old lady in a thin, pink bathrobe bursts out of a bathroom and rushes past me without a word. It startles me. Now Iíve made it to Melissaís room (different) and notice that itís kind of messy. Sheís sitting at a desk in the corner, wearing what is either pajamas or lingerie, a matching blue set. They look like satin and lace. We start talking and I think Iím sitting or something, as she comes over, puts a leg up and pulls the bottom to the side, and I start licking her. Iíve barely started when a noise just outside the door causes her to jump back and straighten herself up at the desk again. I sit up normally, but am laughing as Brooke comes in. I donít worry about it, as I couldíve been laughing at a joke for all she knows. There is a mirror across from me, and looking in it I move a portion of my hair along the part.




      Michelle is driving me and Melissa somewhere, and she is driving terribly. She starts driving the wrong way and only us telling her causes her to realize it. The cars that were coming slow and stop for her as she reverses. Having not reversed far enough, she hits the landscaped divider and then decides to drive right over it. She makes it to the other side, but we are still going the wrong way. We eventually end up going the right way, as I notice an old fashioned sheriff car turn right in front of us. I think Ďoh godí or something similar and hope for the best.




      I am sitting in my car that is backed into the driveway. I know it is 6 am; it is light out but the sun is not up yet. The mountains glow yellow, pink, and blue. I had woken up, started listening to an early Pink Floyd show, and then came out here. I notice a larger family on the street in front of me. There are about three or four kids of different ages. All are wearing shorts and tee shirts and look happy and ready to go. They also look like theyíre deciding which way to go, pointing and looking back and forth. The next thing I know, theyíre walking up the lawn towards our house. I am on edge for a second, but then think theyíre probably just going into the communal area. Iím now back inside and see my things on the bed where I left them. I think itís my laptop and a dream journal. This room seems square and somewhat empty. I think about finishing the show, but Melissa is awake. Surprised, I ask if she feels awake, and she enthusiastically says yes.




      Iím in a parking lot with some others. It seems dim to dark out. We are secretly going to put a sticker or two on Feliciaís car (a white car or truck?). The sticker is three words, I think, including Ďfuckí or Ďfuckingí.
    8. Wednesday, May 6

      by , 05-11-2020 at 10:29 PM
      I am inside what seems to be a high school. I notice that there arenít as many people as perhaps there usually would be. There is a somewhat subdued sense of confusion, uncertainty, and unease. We have been waiting a long time for the teacher to show up, and I finally give up. I get up and walk out, calling Mom on my phone. When I ask where sheís at, she says she just got here. She asks if I see her and looking in the hallway through the window I do see her stepping out of the classroomís doorway. I guess sheís here to teach, but I am already set on leaving. I tell her ďIím so fucking done with this.Ē She just resolutely says ďokay.Ē I hang up and start walking home. I pass a driveway full of parked cars, some haphazardly, I think one even in the middle of the street. Now I have parked my car at what looks like Dadís house. An old man walks past me, heading towards the front door. He is extremely hunched over, almost completely folded, and walking quickly with short strides on straight legs. I feel bad for doing so, but I reach for my phone to take a video. Before I can get to it, the man straightens up and starts walking normally. I am now talking with him. He looks like a generic older white man with short, white hair and somewhat bloated features. He also looks different from the man I initially saw. There is also something that is giving me odd vibes about him. Apparently he is one of my teachers, and he says that heís grading some papers that I know are pretty old by now. He asks if mine is Ď[something] Riverí and I say yes, that sounds right, but I also just think thatís the title of the text? I think he is trying to hint that mine is one of the better ones.




      I am outside with a small group of unfamiliar others. Weíre in what seems to be a huge tunnel with a flat and vast concrete roof. Looking up to it, I ponder its structural stability. I think of what would happen if it were to collapse right now - would any passerby notice, would we die or survive? I think that so long as Melissa is by my side I would be fine.
      Tags: old man, school
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    9. Sunday, May 3

      by , 05-11-2020 at 10:28 PM
      Iím at what seems like a high school. There are a lot of others here, and we are all by smaller openings that kind of look like shop doors and have a common area that looks like a gym or foyer. Thereís going to be a competition of painting snowboards? and showing them off. These Ďsnowboardsí are blank wooden pieces that are taller and wider than actual snowboards. Iím painting mine with a stealie that takes up about a third of the space (towards the top) and is backed by what looks like the night sky blending into space. Looking around, I see at least two other stealies and think that the Grateful Dead must be trendy now. The group right next to me - they look like the trendy sort - are doing one: it is a close up on the lower portion of the stealie above some thick strips of Rasta color. I watch as they pour paint onto the board, it lingers and slowly starts to spread, and then of its own accord slides perfectly into the lines. The stealie itself is far too vivid to have been painted - it looks more airbrushed. I am at the first door on the left and was assuming Iíd be going first, but it turns out that Iíll be going last. It seems like these presentations are taking forever. I think thereís something about Melissa coming over after this; Iím getting impatient because this seems to be going on into the night.




      Iím at a picnic style table at the bottom of a slight but fairly long hill in what seems to be a pretty barren landscape. Iím with two others (Ryan and Mom?) and eating McDonald's. Iím eating hot dogs with onions or relish and say how I always get two of them because of the deal. I think I eat a few other things, feeling very full at this point. The last thing i eat is a piece of chocolate cake. There is a waiter that comes over a few times and a comment about him being gay as he approaches (I think he is wearing very short shorts). The others get up to leave, but I want to order dessert.
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    10. Saturday, May 2

      by , 05-11-2020 at 10:24 PM
      I am in the room of some house. Also here is John. I am aware of the fact that he is actually not living, so I guess this must be some kind of apparition or spirit visitation. He does look somewhat different, though not his features - maybe a tiny bit transparent. His expression and demeanor are peaceful, happy, and content. We talk, and it is nice to talk to him. I express that I donít want this to have to end, and with a grin he says that we are always able to do this.




      I am working at a Starbucks with Brittney. There is a blond girl who orders an iced coffee at the counter but then never takes it. I think that this is supposed to be spiteful and/or mess us up, but I donít see how, as sheís the one out money and without a drink. She continues hanging around and not taking the drink, though thereís no way she canít see it. Brittney and I comment on this. The girl then ends up in an apron and working, doing dishes at a stainless steel sink. I then end up doing dishes, cognizant of how gross they feel. I scrub them with some black strap that has different sections of sponges of different coarseness. I notice that each section is labeled, I think with both a number and letter. I think weíre having a visit or inspection today.
    11. Friday, May 1

      by , 05-08-2020 at 05:22 AM
      I am on a walk. I notice someone coming up behind me so I step side to let them pass. I then notice an old couple coming up quickly and wait for them too. I overhear the man tell the woman that itís time to start their cardio. I think thatís great for them, given their age. I notice how thin his legs are and how thin she is. They pass me on a footbridge thatís probably 30 feet or so long, winding, with some snow left on it. Getting behind them, I say ďmind if I try to keep up with you guys? It might be good for meĒ as theyíre starting to jog. I donít think they mind even though Iím not sure they say anything and I keep following even though I know itís weird what I just did. We do end up talking about different hiking areas. The man mentions somewhere in Orange County, as if itís close, and then a spot that actually is nearby. He points when he talks, but I focus more on the woman (maybe because she is closer?). He says Ďhelloí to get my attention and then looks irritated when I look up after itís already too late. They are both nice and kind of blunt. Weíre on a straightaway of an old dirt road among some pines. To my left there is a small field. In the field there is what looks like the trunk of a Baobab tree. It is topped with flags of different countries? that are currently swelling in the breeze. It seems abandoned or otherwise has some creepy element about it. I take a picture to send to Melissa, thinking of Midsommar. For a second I think I probably shouldnít be this close to this couple with the virus going around. Looking at her, I think it would probably kill her if she got it. They donít seem to be concerned though. We are now near the top of a hill and Iím not sure Iíve been this far. There is a good view of the city behind us (very similar to the actual view) and there is another hill to the left that I think I have walked down before.




      I think Iím in a school or classroom. I have to go to the bathroom and I see that the Ďbathroomí is two stalls right next to what looks like a teacherís desk. The one further from the desk looks slightly larger than the other. The whole setup is awkward. I go different times, each time a different scenario of people at the desk and in the stalls or not. I think at one point HR Rosy is at the desk. I line the toilet seat with the thin toilet paper, conscious of everyone being able to hear what Iím doing in here.
    12. Thursday, April 30

      by , 05-06-2020 at 08:14 PM
      I am with Melissa in what seems to be some kind of cave or room with stone walls. It is pretty dim and all that seems to be in here is a grid like stone floor. I think Melissaís mom is here too, just hanging out in the background. The floor is like a word search, and when you choose a letter you press the grid section down a few inches (and it stays pressed down). While we are doing this, Melissa takes a phone call from the girl scout mom Rebecka. She tells Melissa that her daughter is undergoing surgery and that itís become critical. This makes me feel worried and uneasy, but Iím not sure what to do.




      I am in Iowa and have applied for a college. I am outside, probably on the campus, talking to a thin blond lady who must be staff. Iím asking how long it takes for them to get back to me after Iíve applied. She casually replies that I am supposed to get back to them again. Iím not very impressed with that and think about what it would be like going to school here. Iím sure this isnít the only one out there and there has to be more I can consider. I think about going through the application process all over again. Later I am messaging Sage about it; she says this is Maynardís home state, which makes sense except for him leaning a little to the left. (I think there was also something about Dad coming to see me and parking in a metered spot - going over time/getting a ticket?).




      Iím with Melissa and weíve gone to visit Laynie and her baby. I think weíre all sitting on her bed, Laynie up against the headboard. Laynieís Ďbabyí looks proportionate and maybe toddler ageÖ but is only about six or so inches tall. This seems to strike none of us as odd. The kid boisterously plays around on Laynie as we talk. At one point it falls down face first off her shoulder, almost humorously, as if to get attention. I think I notice bruises on the kid. Laynie doesnít seem to be paying her much attention.
    13. Wednesday, April 29

      by , 05-01-2020 at 05:36 AM
      I am on a walk with Melissa, currently in a neighborhood. It seems nicer and the houses are not that close together, possibly because weíre on the outskirts of it. Now the houses are all but gone and it looks like weíre coming up on the Hunter Creek trail. We walk for a little bit up the slight grade and end up on a large driveway of faded, rusty orange stone. A few paces ahead of us there are about three or four kids also heading uphill. I think they are all girls. The oldest looks to be maybe eight and the youngest three or so. We nonchalantly keep walking with them and end up inside this large house on the hill. Melissa and I are in a smaller and tidy bedroom, maybe a guest room, and can hear the kids messing around behind the closed door of another room. Melissa now stands up and pulls her pants down; she is going to change. Before she can do anything else, there is some movement in the hallway and then a man and a teenage boy who is probably his son appear in the doorway. There is something off about both of their facial features. The whole scene is awkward. Melissa is wearing a shirt long enough to cover herself, but she does not pull her pants up. I assume the man is the homeowner and I am bracing for what comes next as he has just found two strangers in his house, but he just stands there and never says a word. For some reason, the waistband of my shorts (my blue athletic ones) is very low and Iím trying to discreetly pull them up. I know the scene looks bad too, with her pants down - from his perspective it probably looks like she was quickly trying to put them back on. I guess the man is just used to people showing up in his house, and now he is gone. I am now in a large, open living room. Another man with a small dog shows up. Itís just the two of us in here, so he starts talking to me, telling me the dog is Zoe. I tell him I have a Zoe too, a black lab. We make small talk as I throw a toy for this small dog. I think about introducing myself but never do, and he doesnít either. He has glasses, is somewhat dopey looking, and talks rather slow. This room has a window almost the size of the whole wall. Looking through it, I can see that itís close to sunset. There are hazy clouds with a tint of orange and closer to Mt. Rose there is a group of clouds with the sun behind them. There is a very large patio area with some people on it watching the sunset. I notice a couple, the guy behind the girl with his arms around her. The man in here makes a comment about some girls out there. I say something about my girlfriend being in the other room and then walk outside. I get to the end of the patio - it ends at a fairly steep rocky incline that has flat areas that you can still get to. There are a few people hanging out in these areas. I notice two girls laying on their backs, wearing shorts and tight grey tank tops. It is growing darker out and the sunset is getting good. There is a laptop out here playing a Dead and Company live stream, though the current song is nothing I recognize. (I think I somehow see the set list and the first few songs are nothing I recognize and nothing theyíve really played). Someone behind me is watching and right before they walk away they make a comment about them looking like Ďscience geeksí? I think itís because John is wearing glasses. I am looking at the sky again now and at one cloud in particular. This cloud, silhouetted by the sun, looks remarkably like an angel. There are wings, arms bent as if in prayer, and even a clear halo. I quickly take my phone out to take a picture to send to Mom. I take a picture and a video just in case the clouds shift. When I look back at the video, I see the part of the cloud that looks like the arm very quickly move to its face and back down, as if wiping a tear. I think this whole thing is miraculous.
    14. Thursday, April 23

      by , 04-27-2020 at 05:45 AM
      I am flying. It seems that Iíve looked around me and noticed that I am maybe fifty feet or so up into the air. I notice the blue sky surrounding me and have to concentrate hard to keep moving upwards. There are two birds that I surpass. I notice a white fence way down below and continue using all of my willpower to stay afloat. There is music playing, seemingly just emanating from the surroundings, that I can hear crystal clear (but donít remember) and that helps me stay afloat. I think I eventually come down.




      I am on a walk and almost back to the house when I notice a house with an open garage. There is an older man sitting in a chair at the threshold with what looks like a border collie at his feet. It looks like he is having a small garage sale with most of the stuff in the garage (I think the driveway is short). I walk up and start petting the dogís soft fur. I briefly consider the possibility of this spreading the virus, but the man doesnít seem to care. The man seems friendly and pleased to have company. He says hi, I ask how he is, and we make small talk. Despite his amiability, I sense something slightly off. I notice a box of books and a box of what looks like VHS tapes. Thereís really not much more, and nothing that catches my attention. The man asks if I have a MasterCard. I tell him ďI have a Visa card,Ē not sure why heís asking, unless he has a card reader. I was about to leave, but he starts telling me that he wants me to leave a card since Iíve already looked at stuff. A little baffled, I tell him itís not that I donít trust him but I just donít feel comfortable doing that. Mom now shows up, like she was on a walk too. I tell the man I live right across the street, gesturing to the house directly across the street, asking if that changes anything. He contemplates and then says no. Mom and I just walk away from him; he accepts defeat without a word and sits back down. I notice his kind of creepy, flyaway white hair.




      I am in some house; Mom is here too. I open the fridge and see that I have about ĺ of a glass of dark beer left. I wonder if itís still good. I open some cabinets where the trash should be, but only find a ton of empty craft beer bombers.
    15. Wednesday, April 22

      by , 04-22-2020 at 09:54 PM
      I think I am outside somewhere with Jake. The area seems to be pretty barren, and there may be only one other person here. Jake is showing me what he does for work. This entails a sheet with a picture on it that is broken up into small rectangles by a grid. I think the picture is some machine with a slide/chute set against an empty landscape like the one we’re on. His job is to categorize each rectangular segment. I see a cheat sheet, I think with the sections filled in green, orange, or red. It seems to be that almost anyone can do this simple processing of information, though I think some of the sections are specialized terms, which worries me, though I know they’ll come to be understood in the course of the job. I think of working outside, envisioning my current wardrobe and what it may lack, and like the thought. I think of how it’s probably the same thing day after day, but push the thought aside.




      I am scrambling on a slabby rock face. I intended to come down after a certain height, but it is so easy that I continue. There is a loose feeling flake towards the top; I just try not to pull too hard on it.

      Updated 05-06-2020 at 08:11 PM by 95084

      Tags: climbing, work
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