Thread: Rant and Rave, Cry and Complain

Originally Posted by Zhaylin

Astaroth, Tommo, LouaiB, Anju and everyone else

I quit school so I never got that farewell sadness. I was celebrating I guess I was a little sad to leave my GED class. I REALLY liked the teacher and even wrote her a poem before I left.

The trip was brutal. I drove 12 hours or so down there. Hubby took over in the middle for 5 hours. I drove the entire 17 hours back. I slept through Louisville (I think it was) down there and ugh- it liked to have killed me on the way back. It was the toughest part of the drive.
Hubby bought a piece of glass that was obscenely expensive- half of his retirement fund. He could have bought 3 houses with what he spent at this auction But it was a once in a lifetime thing and I'm glad he got something he enjoys. He even outbid a museum and got a round of applause afterwards I told him I didn't want to hear him grumbling about my windshield I wanted something we knew nothing about and he got it for me for $800. It goes for a lot more overseas (or so the owner told me later- it was from the estate of her late husband), so if I had to sell it, that would be the place. It's a Russian enameled egg with a swan on it and it opens (I have a love for "boxes" of all kinds)

Hubby wasn't even grumpy this trip, but I was on the last day. I needed food (the auctioneer ordered pizza but it wasn't showing up). We made it back at on Saturday at 4:30AM and I've been recovering ever since.

Hope everyone is well.

back

Originally Posted by Anju

Rant/Rave: A head-hunter called me regarding a job last friday. I went there today. 2 tests and 4 rounds of interviews. I was almost dead by evening. They need some documents from me, after which they'll make an offer.

I did this for a company in another state. It was BRUTAL. I had to talk to, I don't even remember how many people, sell myself to each of them, and try to remember what I said to whom. By the end, I got on the train and just went into a daze. I got an offer that day too, which was relieving, but it felt so useless after the fact.

Hopefully the woman that stopped her car at the end of a blind turn with no shoulder didn't get hit while she was... picking flowers from the side of the road. At least she turned on her 4-way flashers.

Well I don't really know if I got in. I sent the documents today. They need a person to join immediately and I have a long notice period on my current job. But if they don't find a more suitable candidate in a day or two, they may just buy me out of the notice period. The tests were okay, I'm pretty sure I did well. And the HR guy was pretty cute. Then there was a very grumpy lady and one guy who was absolutely arrogant. The final interviewer was kinda nice.

All this was nothing compared to the placement days we had in college, running from one interview to the next from 9 am to 9 pm. When there are 50+ companies taking interviews, you can't attend all but try to attend as many as you can. Most of them don't even give a brief about the job positions, so you can't really decide which ones to attend. There was no coordination or proper communication; just one huge mess. Just remembering it makes me feel sick!

I ALMOST!!!....twisted my right ankle!! ....i was startled and got up from bed too quick because someone was at the door....now it's sore...it will take a few days to make it go away.....if i move my ankle to the direction where i twisted it....it hurts but i can walk....thanks God....all i needed was not to walk >_> or soon walk with a limp.

My Craft Vapery order came in. I have been chain vaping the bottles since I got them. Delicious flavors. I just need to fix my vaporizer, and I am golden.

The club is a bit expensive, so I may try Zodist next.

Thanks Hathor

I have finally recognized my pattern and can fix it I tend to disappear from this site- sometimes for a month at a time- and it's usually after a trip with hubby. I think trips socially exhaust me to the point I can't even socialize online

for you ankle, Hathor.
Anju. I hope you get the job. What a stressful process!!!

Enjoy, Tiresias! I'm stuck on vanilla lol. I'm making myself finish my first bottle ever (bought at around the first of the year!)- Chocolate Raspberry... but I mixed it with vanilla It's still too strong though.

My rant is that the kids didn't take care of the kittens eyes while I was gone, which set back them getting better. The runts eyes are just now starting to open. I feel like a vet. I have standard boric acid eye drops, steroid drops and bacterial drops, then I have baby oil and cotton balls for the dogs ears. The runt can lay in the palm of one hand, she's that tiny. But she and her siblings were exploring yesterday and they stumbled across the cat food and started eating! So they're at least 6 weeks old. Sable's precious. She follows us around everywhere. After I cleaned her eyes, I was talking to her and she just stared into my eyes and started falling asleep She's definitely the loviest one of the bunch.

And my pitbull is so ferocious She cleans the bottoms of the kittens and shares the same food. She'll be overrun with cats and doesn't care one lick. (Even though there are TWO bowls, all the animals eat from one at a time until it's gone).

It's great to be home.

, everyone.

My favorite flavor tastes just like a handful of Skittles.

WOO we have another vaper here!
All my equipment is screwed at the moment This last atomiser is barely working, one of my batteries is I think filled with liquid and intermittently works, and I'm just waiting on ALDI to sell those jewellery cleaners so I can clean my last remaining atomisers up. I'm so broke now, but I need new vaping stuff.

Originally Posted by Anju

That's easy to say. But for a person like me with zero social skills I can neither get a relationship nor a friend with benefits. The only guys I can get are the ones who don't care.

Well, I don't think that's true. With all this stuff about your job interviews etc. it seems to me you at least have the social skills necessary to land jobs. Most people lack that.
And, at the risk of being weird, IIRC from a couple of pics you posted a while ago, you're super pretty. I don't think it would be too difficult for you to find a good guy.
But then again I don't really know you and am judging from a few brief online interactions.

Even if you are that socially awkward, you could always find a socially awkward guy.


Rant: I'm getting angry over Lankan girl again. She held the door open for me today and it just sent me back in to the same old though patterns, especially because that stupid, possibly sociopathic manager was there.
Thankfully I was less angry than I used to be. I think her effect on me is fading at least a bit and I'm coming to terms with the fact that she was a just a self-centered, shallow bitch who loves herself way too much, so much so that I don't she can ever really love another person.

Another rant.... I was looking at how I can get in to a Vet course, and there are thankfully more than one university now. It used to be only one in all of Australia that had it. So I was relieved a bit.
However, they all still have super high entry requirements. One of them has some ridiculous thing where you have to go there for FOUR days and do a bunch of interviews and all this other crap. Seriously ridiculous. And as far as I can tell, they all want you to have proof of long-standing interest in the field, like work experience, volunteering etc. The most I think I can get, and have some of, is at my uncle's vet clinic, but I'm sure they'll want more. I have no idea how to get that. Even the damn RSPCA wants interviews with people with experience to simply volunteer. For free! What!?
It's insane....

There's also the fact that if I have to go to another uni, it'll be in another state. I have no idea how I'll live since the current fucktard government just took away pretty much all social welfare, and in the course guidelines they specifically say you really won't have time to have a part-time job, since you have a massive amount of study and have to do work experience as part of the course as well.

Kinda lost at the moment. I also just want to live my life, travel, see all these amazing places I've seen in documentaries and live in different cultures.... and it just conflicts so much with what I'm currently trying to do. I'm wondering if I should just become a doctor, since then I can pretty much go anywhere and will be able to make good money to take time off to travel and do whatever. The only thing making me not want to do that is the fact that I hate people in general and wouldn't even want to help them. It does seem much simpler though.

Originally Posted by Zhaylin

Thanks Hathor

I have finally recognized my pattern and can fix it I tend to disappear from this site- sometimes for a month at a time- and it's usually after a trip with hubby. I think trips socially exhaust me to the point I can't even socialize online

for you ankle, Hathor.
Anju. I hope you get the job. What a stressful process!!!

Enjoy, Tiresias! I'm stuck on vanilla lol. I'm making myself finish my first bottle ever (bought at around the first of the year!)- Chocolate Raspberry... but I mixed it with vanilla It's still too strong though.

My rant is that the kids didn't take care of the kittens eyes while I was gone, which set back them getting better. The runts eyes are just now starting to open. I feel like a vet. I have standard boric acid eye drops, steroid drops and bacterial drops, then I have baby oil and cotton balls for the dogs ears. The runt can lay in the palm of one hand, she's that tiny. But she and her siblings were exploring yesterday and they stumbled across the cat food and started eating! So they're at least 6 weeks old. Sable's precious. She follows us around everywhere. After I cleaned her eyes, I was talking to her and she just stared into my eyes and started falling asleep She's definitely the loviest one of the bunch.

And my pitbull is so ferocious She cleans the bottoms of the kittens and shares the same food. She'll be overrun with cats and doesn't care one lick. (Even though there are TWO bowls, all the animals eat from one at a time until it's gone).

It's great to be home.

, everyone.

Yes my ankle got better after lots of ice pack hours.....it got better next day.
And i love kitties especially the newborns....too cute !

My obsession with True Detective has gone so deep I'm practically buying measuring tape and hiding letters in my fridge. /House of Leaves reference

Spoilers below

I knew I was in trouble the first time I heard Cohle explain his beliefs and realized how completely I agreed, the only difference being I'd incorporated his outcome where he evolves from nihilism to existentialism.

I just learned The King in Yellow is a collection of horror stories published in 1895: The King in Yellow - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
I knew there were a lot of references and picked up on most of them, but it's one thing to see an H.P. Lovecraft reference used to create a dark, esoteric atmosphere. The shared content of these short stories is a play called The King in Yellow which is basically a suicide song, something that creates utter despair in all who read it. In that sense, the King in Yellow is the destruction of blissful ignorance. The truth of the universe is so horrifying it drives all who find it insane and irreconcilably depressed.

I've watched the series through twice and I'm reading a collection of essays on it: True Detective: One Measures A Circle Beginning Anywhere

One startlingly apt quote from the first essay: "...there is an underlying rhythm to reality, and by living in the right way and taking the right drugs and being a general desperate bastard you can perceive it. You can never control it and you can never, never understand it, but it is there and it can be seen. Sometimes."

The search for the real truth and nature of existence leaves us teetering on the edge of insanity. A symptom of schizophrenia is to find unwarranted associations everywhere and in everything. True Detective purposefully creates connections and coincidences which, much like Schizophrenics do, a string of fans have used to find the truth of a conspiracy regarding the Tuttles and their cult. But really, they're positioned there because the background reacts to the foreground. I think it's accidental but exceedingly revealing how fans reactions to the coincidences in True Detective parallels a schizophrenic's own reaction to coincidence. There's something deeper, but to them it's external, it's a conspiracy.

The background reacts to the foreground. And this is the secret truth I think would do a lot of schizophrenics some good. Experimenting with psychedelic drugs and you'll watch synchronicity, as an idea, grow undeniable. And you wonder what it means, what it changes about your recognition of the universe. Does it mean there's a divine plan? That you're exactly where you're supposed to be? No, there is no divine plan, you're not supposed to be anywhere. Even if you were there are infinite other yous in infinite other life choices with infinite other results, and they're all exactly where they're supposed to be as well. All it means is that the background reacts to the foreground.

Originally Posted by tommo

Well, I don't think that's true. With all this stuff about your job interviews etc. it seems to me you at least have the social skills necessary to land jobs. Most people lack that.
And, at the risk of being weird, IIRC from a couple of pics you posted a while ago, you're super pretty. I don't think it would be too difficult for you to find a good guy.
But then again I don't really know you and am judging from a few brief online interactions.

Even if you are that socially awkward, you could always find a socially awkward guy.

Well, i'm not great at interviews but I do well in tests and practical tasks which makes up for my lack of talking. Also, I can be enthusiastic when I explain my work. It is casual conversation that I have trouble with. With socially awkward guys, it's even more difficult because they won't start conversations and neither will I.

Rave: I got the job! And they're offering me more salary than what I had asked for! How will i spend all the money?

Hm, I'm quite the same. Although I'm getting better all the time at casual conversations.

Well how about someone that just doesn't care about talking constantly? I've found I've connected most with those people.
Anyway, congrats on the job!


I'm on a happy note tonight. I'm slightly high for the first time in ages. Feels good.
I did alright on my exam. Not great, but alright. They asked some ridiculous questions which were covered in the lectures for like 30 seconds, which I thought was pretty unfair, especially since they constantly said "good knowledge of the overall processes and concepts is all you need", then they ask stupidly specific questions. At least I know the way I need to study now.

I also decided I'm just going to go for it, and stop worrying about the future so much. I'll see if I can get some more experience at my uncle's clinic, after a few months I'll try some other places and then see where it goes from there. If I don't get in to any of the vet courses first time, I'll go for another year in this course since it's basically the same as the others anyway, and apply again the year after.

If not I'll work on something else when the time comes, no use worrying about it now.

Woot! Grats Anju!!
Glad your ankle recovered so quickly, Hathor!

My rant is that my anxiety has not eased since being home. But truly only in the form of these infuriating yawns. Wellbutrin has failed me. In the silence before sleep I also fall into a deep depression. I nearly SIed this morning. I told myself the mood would pass, that I just needed to stop thinking and go to sleep. Eventually, I did. While I'm awake, I'm too preoccupied to think anxious or depressing thoughts. When everything is silent before sleep though It drives me nuts!!!
I finally broke down and called my youngest daughters case worker today. I never get her though and she never returns my calls which is infuriating. I don't even know if my daughter is still alive. So I told her that in the message: "I know you can't tell me specifics, but I'd at least like to know if she's alive and well..."

I'll call her every day next week and if she can't be bothered to return my calls, I'll threaten her with a lawyer. My rights were not relinquished, dammit. I'm giving my daughter space out of respect for her and her request. But I should at least be told if she's okay.

My good habits of monitoring what I eat and exercising daily were destroyed by the trip Every night I tell myself I'll get back on track tomorrow.............

I'm going to blow up my brain if these friggin yawns don't knock it off Why can't I just breathe like a normal person?

Not a great week, but I ended it with an amazing working out, and I am being super productive.

Grats, Tiresias. Hope this week is even better

I got off my butt yesterday and took the dog on our walk, so I'm happy about that.
A rant is that I actually found myself lucid last night. I was going to have sex but then my subconscious had other plans and the dream changed, I lost lucidity and dreamed of my youngest daughter. She came home to let me know she's okay. She said she was diagnosed with bipolar and explained some of her behavior stemming from that. She said she was sorry for cutting me out of her life, but she still needed space and wasn't comfortable with me even knowing where she is. It was a great wish fulfillment dream which was peaceful and wonderful while it lasted.
Then I dreamed my oldest son was in some sort of accident and was bloody and had wounds all over his body... that was probably a subconscious thing too seeing how it's his fault I've lost touch with my baby. As long as he lives here, my daughter will never come back into my life.

Being a mother really sucks sometimes

Originally Posted by Anju

@Louai, Why don't you come here more often? DV is no fun without you

Awww thank you Anju! It's very nice to hear that!
I'm planning to be more active here, though I still don't have net most of the days

I just remembered, I promised I'll post a photo of myself here, I totally forgot sorry!! Here it is!



Ain't I a handsome devil!? *smiles while petting the couch*
Why am I smiling like that?? I can't smile for the camera! sob

I like your new avatar BTW! Is that you? That girl is VERY beautiful!

Oh and congrats!

@ zhaylin thnx for the hug! hug back! (Hug)

Speaking of sex dreams i had one after a long while of not recalling dreams.....feels like i'm recalling 2 dreams in 1 month....not good!!! I used to recall 5-6 a month!
So i realized after waking up from a very sexual/sensual dream and i woke up like this....
drooling all over my pillow...usually i get that when i'm sleeping very well, but not after a damn sex dream!


RAVE!: I bought a very good price of a real "nike" Portugal team jersey "dri-fit" and all, got it online from China! Got it for 17 dollars! usual price here would be 80! what a deal! with name and number of player on it ! Love it! ^_^ even the shipping was a bit more but totally worth it...total costs were 44$....still half of 80$! Doesn't look like a knock off at all!
I rather buy nike straight from China....because it is from there being made and i rather pay for what it's "really worth" and not what it's not really worth....80 dollars or 90 is ridiculous! One thing missing was the Nike logo...but idfc about it all i care is what that Jersey stands for...my true country <3 and the RED on the Jersey and all OMG to die for! I LOVE red! <3...actually there is the Nike logo...GOD i'm so blind to logos lol...that's how much i don't care about it when it comes to this jersey....i searched online and the women jerseys are like 100$!!? Daaaang...and i got mine for 17..AND with number and name...which you won't find in stores...mine is SO custom made i love it!!! I like how mine has more stripes than the original. Which is the only thing different about it...so far i need to stop raving now.....bye....lol
NIKE-627200_677_A_11.jpg< Not worth 100 dollars and there is no name & number smh...while mens are 100 with the name/numbers. >_>
(rant) fuck you Nike.

Originally Posted by Zhaylin

Woot! Grats Anju!!
Glad your ankle recovered so quickly, Hathor!

My rant is that my anxiety has not eased since being home. But truly only in the form of these infuriating yawns. Wellbutrin has failed me. In the silence before sleep I also fall into a deep depression. I nearly SIed this morning. I told myself the mood would pass, that I just needed to stop thinking and go to sleep. Eventually, I did. While I'm awake, I'm too preoccupied to think anxious or depressing thoughts. When everything is silent before sleep though It drives me nuts!!!

Ugh, yep screwthis. Scumbagm..and.my.spacebar.is.broken....fuck....be. back.later...edit:WAIT...i..see.a.space.in.there.. ...oh.was.automatic.dV.spacing.after.fullstop...da mmit,wait.now.theres.one.in.dammit....whatthehelli sgoingon!

Handsome young man, indeed, Louai
Grats on the great deal, Hathor!!

lol, Tommo... sorry, Hope your keyboard knocks it off soon (or you're able to quickly find a replacement).

My rant is that I wasted $10. My son's playing Runescape, which made me want to play. I never play without membership, though, so I bought a card. The game wont load What the heck?!!!! I uninstalled all of my old java files, rebooted my machine twice and then the game worked for all of 2 minutes before crashing. RAWWWWRRRRRR!!!
A rave is that my yawns are beginning to subside. I also took another 30 minute walk with the dog this evening.

A silly rant is that I went out for wipes night before last. Walmart was out of the ones I use (generic NON-flushable). So I had to buy a substitute (name brand with aloe and vitamin e added- there were none without those things). They suck. I looked for mine again last night and they still didn't have any. GRRRRR!!!! It's silly that this bothers me so much, but it does.

Maybe I'll go to bed.

Goodnight, DV
(Hope you're well and having a good time with Biesty, Dianeva)

Thnx Zhaylin!

Rant: YouTube is barely loading any videos, and when it does, they're loosing the buffering suddenly! Lol I need those art tutorials!!
Lunch is ready! Chicken curry yumm(with rice)

You're welcome, Louai

Arg... I just woke up from the WORST sleep in memory. At one point, I dreamed someone was looking at my throat and I woke as I was opening my mouth wide Then I dreamed that I and a slew of others went on some heroic mission to locate another planet. When we returned to the ship, it was revealed that all of us were to be publicly tortured and executed. The dream was intensely emotional, with me crying from anger and arguing with those in command.
I tossed and turned all night... and I didn't even go to bed until 4AM (woke at 10:30)

I'm envious of you and your chicken curry, Louai. I'm off to eat slim jims. I'm really getting sick of those things

Tommo- ya you need a new keyboard there, they don't last forever.
Louaib- youtube is starting to suck
Zhaylin- LOL dreams they are sometimes funny. And sometimes tricky, i get those mission dreams too but i always win what is opposing.

RANT- So i am paying like close to 80 dollars of internet and i managed to fix my plan a few months ago...NOW in June they (ISP company) rose the price and I'm getting shitty speed now...and pay more for bandwidth but seems like i need more now smh.
So i decided to shop around online and browse for a LESS popular but better ISP company...and I'm leaving the MAJOR 2 big ISP companies so i can get more bandwidth and better speed for less money. More like half for what I'm paying for now which is ridiculous.

Glad you were able to find better for cheaper!!! There's only 1 company in my area. I have no idea how much we spend but it's well over $100. a month (they charge extra for exceeding "typical" bandwidth usage). I hope hubby remains in the dark over the bill for a long, long time or he'll cut us off. Thankfully, his office Manager pays our bills so we never actually see any of them.

My rant is friggin Runescape. WTH?!!! CRC errors are some sort of cyclic redundancy thing. I've read a lot of people having problems with their computer hard drive being corrupt etc, but I only have the problem with THAT game. Then I went to CMD and tried to do a diskcheck but it said I don't have permission. What the heck? *I* am the Administrator, stupid computer. There are no other users on this machine.
Next, I need to find out how to start my computer in Safe Mode and try the game that way.

I can't play it at all from the computer page. From the game launcher I can play for 2-6 minutes before the CRC error disconnects me. But while it's working, it works perfectly fine. I do not understand the problem...
Then I went to see if my graphic card needed upgraded and my computer ALWAYS freezes while intel is doing it's auto scan

So I am done dealing with this for the day

Otherwise, it's a great day. Thunderstorms are rolling in and so long as we don't lose power (or if we do, not for too long), I'll be one seriously happy camper.
Also, the kittens eyes are finally clearing up and my bird has finally stopped squawking his head off
And I had Wendy's for dinner. Life is good