non-lucid

Morning of January 12, 2018. Friday.



Zsuzsanna and I watched “Let Me In” (from 2010) last night and I considered that it would be an intriguing idea to structure as a dream state fantasy. Still, I did not put any actual effort into the idea, though it still influenced a small part of my dream.

At any rate, my dream has an unfamiliar setting. It reminds me of the King Street mansion in some ways, though the tower feature is duplicated to the opposite side of the house. My father is walking on a narrow wooden plank that is apparently supported by the windowsill of each tower from both sides. My mother is also present, but remains standing on the ground near the residence, at the front of the house.

A couple different times, I am somewhat wary about my father walking back and forth on this thin plank so high up. It seems precarious and although he seems confident and balanced, I have a vague anticipation that he might fall, though he never does.

There is only one scene that reflects a part of the movie, and that does not directly trigger any recall related to my current conscious self identity. As I walk into a different area in a house near the first house (where my parents and I are apparently implied to be living), which is somewhat like a large open featureless porch (though more like a park shelter integrated into a house), a young female is present who says, “Just so you know, I can’t be your friend”, just as in the first part of the movie. This frustrates me somewhat, though I do not recall what the actual influence is related to. (I get the impression that the girl is a young version of Zsuzsanna, though this is only later, as my memory is not extant.) Later, the girl’s mother talks to me about what she (the girl) wants, though she seems to be the actress who played the boy’s mother in the movie (though this does not trigger any recall either).

My dream mainly becomes a generic and typical waking transition. There are two ladders against the porch, one on each side at the front. I feel the need to adjust them, though when I move the ladder on the right (waking orientation symbol) only a little, after climbing up and down on them, the entire house shakes and vibrates. This causes me to stop out of concern of causing my father to fall from the plank. My dream fades after this, with no vestibular system activity (that is, no typical waking jolt based on perceived flight, rising, or any falling sensation or typical spontaneous muscle movement).

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Afternoon of January 9, 2018. Tuesday.



In my previous entry, “Known Key Symbolism 2018: Common Liminal Space Settings (1)”, I explained how a porch, a parking lot, and a store checkout are known forms of dream state symbolism that typically mark the last segment of my dreams during the waking process (and of which have featured in thousands of my dreams as such since childhood). As also stated, there are many more, though typically that which symbolizes liminal space in the dream state is that which symbolizes liminal space in reality (just as that which represents a liminal space divider in a dream is that which symbolizes a liminal space division in reality, for example, a fence, a wall, a presumably closed window or door, or even a ceiling if one becomes focused on it, even the contrast of ground and sky in some dreams). This entry relates to another common factor of my dreams, what I now mainly refer to as dream state indicators (referred to as dream signs in most older entries, though others use that term in a slightly different way).

In the hour or so leading up to going to bed and going to sleep, what do people do? Many people take their shoes off. They probably get undressed. They are eventually typically in bed, sleeping, often in a dark room.

So why are people puzzled when they are not wearing shoes (or cannot find their shoes) when in the dream state? Why are they puzzled about being undressed, including being undressed in public? If the physical body is undressed, why would someone be surprised about not being fully dressed while in the dream state regardless of the dream’s setting?

In this entry, I will mostly only write of first-level dream state indicators without getting into the more complicated factors. Some of the more obvious dream state indicators (for me) are:

Not wearing shoes or being undressed in public (of which I am typically not only unconcerned about, but which I often initiate deliberately in lucid dreams, including in public places, since I recognize it is just the dream state - and to indulge in additional levels of sensual connections to Zsuzsanna in this “other state”, which of course is literal and literally willed in such a case)

A bed, including a bed in an unusual location (especially in a known liminal space setting)

Appearances of pillows, bed sheets, and bedroom features

Features that exist in our bedroom in real life, including features that are not inherently associated with a bedroom for other people

Seeing someone else (or even an animal) sleeping (though note that dreaming I am sleeping, regardless of the setting, while actually feeling tired, means just that - that my physical body is overtired in real life - this not being in cases where I happen to be in bed or otherwise “sleeping” in the dream state without that augmented sense of tiredness)

This last indicator is so common, I came to typify it (around the age of eight) as “The Sleeper”. (Still, there are cases where The Sleeper is linked to a prescient thread, as when our oldest son got very ill on September 26, 2017, or with my detailed dream that came just prior to our roof being torn off by the storm a couple months back, even including the large tarpaulins being put over our house and the unusual appearance of this sudden and totally unexpected storm.) In some cases (such as “The Dead One” from February 13, 1971), The Sleeper is perceived as a corpse (though in that dream, Brenda came back to life but coalesced into the unconscious space, which is different than waking space coalescence that involves the dream self coalescing back into the conscious self identity).

Dream state indicators can also be related to false awakenings, for example, writing down a previous dream in a dream journal (in a dream) or talking about it with someone else. In some dreams, I have actually, as my dream self, relayed the meaning of a dream without realizing I was in the dream state at the time. False awakenings of this nature are so common that I often do not even document them unless there are unusual or interesting variations. (They occur in a different level of unconsciousness anyway, so are typically not related to the dream that they followed other than writing it down or talking to another dream character about it in the offset dream.)

It should be clear that the nature of liminal space settings of the waking process is completely different from the nature of dream state indicators (though sometimes dream state indicators are rendered in liminal space, which I will explain in another entry). Liminal space settings (and their inherent symbolism) are typically a result of the waking process, whereas dream state indicators are subliminal remnants of having fallen asleep. Thus, on one level, they are opposite factors though which typically occur during the same waking transition.

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Morning of January 6, 2018. Saturday.

Dream #: 18,646-02. Reading time: 1 min 33 sec.



My dream changes from a bathroom wake-up call to reinduction based on the lowering of emerging consciousness anticipation. When I go into the bathroom of our present home, I am surprised by the toilet tank falling into an implied first storey (though our house is only one storey in reality). The toilet tank (cistern) acts as an elevator. It drops down, and I know it will be difficult to get it back up for proper use. Another piece under the tank also does this. The toilet bowl remains in position. At times, I get the tank back up to where it should be, though it slides down to the first floor again.

I eventually forget my need to use the bathroom. I am now working with a miniature toilet from a model kit with the same implications as if my dream’s setting had changed into a model. At one point, I see a sketch of the two-storey building it is in that depicts a few people walking around on the first floor, though it is more like an x-ray view.

My dream changes and I am in Cubitis (where I have not been in real life since 1978). The bed is in the southeast corner of the room where it mostly only was when I was a young boy (though the head of it is in the opposite direction from where it was in reality). There are two unfamiliar black girls in the room whom I recall as close friends. They seem cheerful and are about sixteen. I mostly talk to the person sitting on the bed. There is not much light.

Curiously, I talk about the meaning of the first part of my dream without dream state awareness. I explain about the cistern going down like an elevator, and the bathroom becoming a model. I say how it represents my dream self ignoring my conscious self’s bathroom need and how an elevator correlates with the depth of the dream state, its use relating to the level of consciousness and physicality. I talk about my dreams that feature the loose tall vertical pipe. I explain to her how the pipe being loose reveals that my imaginary dream self is without a viable connection to my conscious identity as I sleep. I add that this is a dreaming process without an “interpretation.“

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Morning of January 5, 2018. Friday.



The time is perceived, by looking at an analogue clock, as about 10:30 at night. Apparently, there is going to be a concert that Zsuzsanna and I will be going to (as well as at least our youngest son, as I see him in the room). We are in the bedroom of our present home. However, the room is different. Our bed is oriented correctly, but there is a toilet just beyond the foot of the bed, facing it (on the right side, and I sleep on the right side of the bed in reality) and at the southeast corner of the room. I do not consider this as unusual.

It seems that it may be a Three Dog Night concert, though this is anachronistic (though my dream self does not consider it as wrong). I see their photograph in a newspaper I am reading and they mainly seem in their early thirties. Curiously, I am aware that I can download a song, though the technology is somehow embedded in the newspaper. I see a metallic image of an MP3 player on the page, with equidistant vertical graduation lines regarding the length of the recording. Under the right side of it is a downwards arrow that implies opening up a context menu or clicking it to download it. (I do not really consider how ridiculous a concept this is, as one cannot click on a newspaper page as on a computer monitor.)

I have to use the toilet, but then I realize that if I did, we would be late. The concert apparently starts at about 10:45, which I see is only about three minutes away. I decide that we will have to miss going to the concert. I wake up anyway, as I need to use the bathroom in reality.

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Morning of January 3, 2018. Wednesday.



My dream begins in an undefined setting. I do not possess any conscious self threads other than a vague association with Nimbin and Tuntable Falls (which I had written about in a recent entry). I am outside, though there are ambiguous shifts where I am also inside at the same time at certain points.

An unfamiliar male of about thirty is present. Apparently, the police are following him, believing him to be carrying drugs. He has a large backpack and some sort of oversized balloon. Eventually, the balloon grows larger and proves to be that of a dinosaur, a tyrannosaurus (though there is no implied threat as it is just a balloon).

Until the last segment, I am not implied to be a direct part of the scenario. However, I am curiously linked to the dynamics of the balloon. When it expands and grows taller, it seems my dream self is also growing larger and taller, though not implied to be seen by the other dream characters.

Somehow, another balloon is present and expands. I believe it is meant to be a rabbit, though there is not that much focus on it.

A third balloon begins to fill with air and grow large and tall, but this time it is a reindeer, somewhat anthropomorphic. Again, I am linked to the balloon, feeling myself growing larger and even hitting my head on the ceiling (though it is not painful) as I watch the reindeer’s head bump the ceiling to my left, even though we are also implied to be outside.

From here, I am annoyed by the presence of RAS (the police) via the preconscious. What started out as the usual return flight waking symbolism (as a flying reindeer is a flight symbol, which truncated the rabbit symbolism of which symbolizes being deeper in sleep) to vestibular system symbolism, triggers an odd level of semi-lucidity to where I am ready to shoot everyone (which symbolizes real-time RAS mediation of the dream state). Bumping my head on the ceiling means a part of my mind is holding me in the dream state, though as I am only semi-lucid, I am unsure of my waking space status and physical orientation. Still, I shoot about six officers in the forehead. They are ducking behind some cover (some sort of flat vertical structure), but I get them one at a time in my semi-lucid waking space. (As I have written in past entries, the association with the man possibly carrying illicit drugs is a dream state potential reinduction factor, as they relate to altering the level of consciousness or unconsciousness.)

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Morning of December 30, 2017. Saturday.



My dream is set in a mostly undefined location. It is already a factor of the waking space (waking transition symbolism). Zsuzsanna and I are sleeping on the floor on a blanket, with no mattress. Although the setting is undefined, there is some essence of the kitchen of our present home, except it seems much larger. As such, we are oriented with our heads to the east when sleeping. It seems to be morning, though there is minimal light.

Curiously, a handicapped young male (of whom we do not know in real life but have seen in the past), is also present on a blanket on the floor to the north. I do not see him as an intruder or even as being imposing.

The setting also has the common ambiguity of bilocation, the sense of being indoors and outdoors at the same time (a result of being in sustained non-lucid waking space), though my focus is more on being in our home. Still, sleet begins to fall. It is small ice pellets, though they are not hitting any of us directly, just falling about onto the blankets. The other male seems somewhat cheerful as I pick up some of the ice pellets. He does not get up from his blanket.

I perceive that the sleet is somehow dry, which puzzles me. I inform Zsuzsanna of this. How could sleet be dry? I know it is made of water (or is supposed to be), yet I also perceive that no water (frozen or otherwise) is present in the ice.

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This is water lowering waking symbolism (though second-level), which has occurred on a regular basis (in one form or another) since childhood. The most likely biological explanation behind this is an association with needing to drink fluids after waking (which is also what desert settings typically indicate). The essence of water is my most common dream state induction factor (and its lowering or lack of presence symbolizes waking from the dream state). Water symbolizes the biological dynamics of sleep in real time. The human body is made of about sixty percent water. (I tend to hear the sound of water flowing when entering a more relaxing sleep, and if my sleep is disturbed briefly or the level of my unconsciousness shifts, I will hear sounds that resemble stones breaking the surface of a pond, at slightly different pitches, which brings me closer to consciousness during the induction state. However, still ponds and small lakes are more on the outer levels of unconsciousness and the dream state. Wider rivers, floods and higher waves, and the ocean, tend to be rendered when I am deeper in sleep and more relaxed - this being the opposite of typical claims by so-called dream interpreters, and in fact, the sound of the raging ocean is used on commercial relaxation tapes to induce sleep.)

I find this dream curious in how there is a subliminal waking space symbol here. The handicapped male is someone we have only seen once in the last several years, and only just recently. We saw him at the shopping mall as we were sitting on a bench that faces the large parking lot. He was off to our left, the same orientation in viewpoint as in my dream when I was standing and facing east. Without intending to sound mean, his mentally disabled status also symbolizes the lack of critical thinking skills when unconscious.

My association with the parking lot as a liminal space factor (both in real life and the dream state) rendered him in my dream as a liminal space “remnant” (rather than being a RAS component or preconscious dynamic), though in the waking space where only blankets (as dream state indicators) were rendered. I find that intriguing, and it only serves to validate what I already know.

The rest is based on associations of when our roof was torn off and it rained inside our house in November. We then slept on the floor in the front room (where part of the roof still covered it) for a time. The kitchen association almost always relates to light hunger in sleep. I suppose there is a bit of wishful thinking here in this particular case as well. We want to stay dry in our house when it rains. Our new roof seems to be okay thus far.

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Morning of December 29, 2017. Friday.



My dream memory starts with me already being in the waking space with no recall of any prior backstory or induction type. I find myself on the Barolin Street porch (a porch being my most common end state marker, symbolizing the closest transition to emergent consciousness).

Despite the setting, my dream distorts the implications into what seems to be a perfunctory attempt at reinduction. I am near a large globe that is implied to be the actual world. I am apparently a giant, bigger than Earth itself (which makes no sense as I am standing on a porch seeming otherwise of normal size). Looking down, I see where I am supposedly meant to go. It is a small island called Oahu. In my dream, it is a smaller part of Japan, not Hawaii. The rest of Japan is rectangular and horizontally oriented on the globe, just east of China. There is no North or South Korea. Oahu is east of the main rectangular part of Japan. I look more closely. My physicality changes but I am still a giant somehow standing on the globe. I am standing in the water (the ocean implied), which is just above my ankles, on the west side of the little island.

I do not want to ruin anything, as the island is almost too small to stand on. Looking down, I notice about six or seven very small animated drawings of people, depicted as walking around, but I see no buildings. The sketchily animated people are not in correct perspective relative to my position. I view them more from their sides (partly in profile) than as if looking down upon them. They seem too big to be able to live in such a small area. They seem to be wearing only white Asian conical hats and white loincloths. Despite them being sketchy animations, I perceive them as real people, or at least indicative of where the “real” people are. They make no indication that they are aware of me, though they are like insects in comparison to my size.

There are some changes in my size, it seems, but the island remains too small to consider suitable for visiting.

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Zsuzsanna and I watched a movie that was set in Hawaii last night, apparently on the island of Oahu (though there was nothing in the movie regarding Japan). I do not know why Japan came in or why Hawaii was supposed to be Japan or whatever; just the usual nonsense.

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Morning of December 28, 2017. Thursday.



I stand before a brick wall with variegated brick colors. The glowing word “FLOATING” (in uppercase, with white letters) appears hovering in the air a couple inches in front of the wall at about face level. That is, each letter of the word itself is floating in the air (and has a neon essence) and I consider that is what the meaning of this feature is (as if associated with a “Sesame Street” short). I am non-lucid, so I fail to recognize the usual vestibular system symbolism, which directly symbolizes being in the dream state. The wall symbolizes the division between the non-lucid fictional dream self identity and the conscious self identity in waking life, though also metaphorically serves as the division between lucidity and non-lucidity while in the dream state.

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Morning of December 24, 2017. Sunday.



The foundation of this dream was totally unexpected, as it was based on a computer program I wrote nearly fifteen years ago and of which I had not thought about for years, before we moved from Brisbane.

I am in an unknown residence but which seems to be where we are implied to be living. My youngest son and I are looking at a large poster-sized image of surreal imagery. In some sections, there are human-like figures of which were created randomly by a special algorithm with a basis for a more natural choice of which next color and in which direction the line would continue. I remember that the first version of my computer program merely had an equal probability for each next line to continue from its previous point. It was like watching an invisible pencil scribble all over the screen, sometimes with insignificant leaf-like or vine-like (or spaghetti-like) patterns (and of course sometimes going beyond the range of the screen and coming back again, though my second version did not have this potential occurrence). Using probability based on a real drawing or other image was more interesting, though still resulted in surreal images that usually did not really look like much of anything. Bitmap (BMP file) templates had to be used (for gleaning probability of particular values as a percentage of the original total), each template image of course producing different results.

I begin to consider that it is very strange, yet intriguing, that images that look so much like people standing around were created randomly. I consider altering how the program is running. My “computer” is very large, bigger than my entire desk in real life. The monitor is the size of a large window. The image appears on the screen and I print it out when I see something interesting.

At one point, I seem to have done something wrong, as when the program starts again, the imagery remains in vertical orientation, looking something like a vine growing upwards, though with “leaves” coming out from each side now and then. I try to adjust it.

Eventually, something quite unusual occurs, as my program seems to be missing certain subroutines. Sections of written print keep appearing along with parts of a Mandelbrot image. It seems like the parts are coming from the same original image, but in unusual irregular swirls and patches over prior imagery. Now I know something is wrong, but I have the false memory that my original template was a Mandelbrot image above a paragraph or two of writing, possibly from a virtual textbook or database. I am somewhat annoyed that it is not working as it should. (I do not consider that I would not have used an image of printed text for any sort of template to produce new random patterns from.) The area of random imagery selected (to be reapplied) is too large to make anything very unique. (This is an unusual false memory which is not perceived as such - yet my thinking skills are otherwise more present than usual as is my current conscious self.)

Just as I think of fixing my program, there is ambiguity of being inside and outside at the same time. A nuclear explosion occurs nearby, though mostly only followed by small fireballs overhead. I get Zsuzsanna and our children and decide to go into a close-by underwater bunker, where I think we might be safe. (This is an attempt at dream state reinduction - returning to the essence of water, which represents the dynamics of sleep, as my sleep was slightly restless towards morning due to the extra warm weather.)

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Morning of December 21, 2017. Thursday.



In my dream, I am living with Zsuzsanna at the Stadcor Street house in Wavell Heights, where we have not lived in years. However, it seems like a “Family Affair” scenario. I happen to seemingly be in the role of Johnny Whitaker as Jody Davis. Zsuzsanna is in the role of Anissa Jones as Buffy Davis. Marilyn (older half-sister on my mother’s side) is in the role of Kathy Garver as Sissy Davis. I am about ten years old and Zsuzsanna (disproportionately to my age) is about eight. We do not look like the television show characters though. We look like ourselves at those ages.

However, Brian Keith is himself, as I know him as Brian Keith rather than his character on the television show. The same with Sebastian Cabot. There is no memory of any of the actors having died. There is no memory of my sister having died. Even though Zsuzsanna is present and we are in the Stadcor Street house, all other memory of my current conscious self identity is absent.

Zsuzsanna, Marilyn, and I are in the kitchen. Brian Keith is working with some sort of large boiler (mostly shaped like a vertically rectangular prism) in the northwest corner of the kitchen. It nearly reaches the ceiling. Something goes wrong and hot water sprays out to the opposite side of the kitchen from the top of the boiler. I watch Brian working in an attempt to fix it. Still, a piece of the boiler falls out from the back. I see many flames near the bottom. I vaguely perceive Brian Keith as my father, even though on the television show, he was my character’s uncle. Even so, I start to realize that there may be danger. I am thinking it will explode and destroy much of the house.

Brian stays, still trying to fix the problem, although I get Marilyn and Zsuzsanna to leave with me by going to the front of the house. On the way, Sebastian Cabot is sitting in an armchair (facing south) in the center of the lounge room, reading a novel. I tell him about the boiler. He formally waves us off to indicate that we should go to the porch to escape the danger. However, he remains seated and calm as if not concerned about the imminent explosion. I think about walls exploding toward us if we do not get to the porch in time, but at another level, I am not really that concerned and remain without much emotion.

Despite the setting having been the Stadcor Street house up to this point, when we go out to the porch from a fictional door in the middle of the west wall of the lounge room, we are then on the King Street boarding house porch (in America).

My dream ends around this point and there is no explosion. (A porch is my most common dream state end marker, which symbolizes the higher level of unconsciousness between dreaming and waking in real time, and has as such since early childhood.)

There is another dream after this, which is not related to this one at all. However, there is then a dream that is related to this same scenario but somewhat different. I am now as I was in the 1980s, though I also, in direct contradiction, perceive myself to have the computer that I have now at our present address. I am even aware of where my computer is, or was, regarding the Stadcor Street house. Oddly though, I do not recall my current conscious self status or of living in Australia (even though the Stadcor Street house is in Australia and I still live in Australia).

The boiler is still acting up. Brian Keith is not present, but I talk to Marilyn (recognizing her as my real sister this time) about how hot it is getting near the west kitchen wall, which may affect the east wall of my den. I ask her if the heat will ruin my computer and she nods without speaking. I yell “f–k you” at an absent Brian Keith about ten times prior to fully waking. (I have not seen “Family Affair” since the 1970s.)

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What a delightfully and ridiculously mangled mess of nonsense this is. I have no idea where any of it came from other than the waking transition symbolism that has been very familiar since childhood. (This includes a boiler or furnace symbolizing the emergent consciousness factor via RAS - the reticular activating system, which is perceived as causing the dream state to enter an “end of the world” perspective, usually completely unrelated to waking life and restricted to merely symbolizing the end of the dream state as it has thousands of other times since early childhood. Fire typically symbolizes the conscious self identity in its emergent consciousness roots in coming out of the dream state - though in this case, there is also the association with the hotter weather.) The kitchen setting usually indicates mild hunger during sleep, more so towards morning. There is also the possibility that, in this case, the potential for the boiler exploding relates to the digestive process (as it was in the kitchen), though I did not have heartburn at any recent point. My concern about my computer was from a subliminal thread of memory from a worker coming in early this morning and fixing the ceiling in our front room, though the computer is on the opposite side from where the work was done.

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Morning of December 20, 2017. Wednesday.



I am writing a booklet in my dream about a factor which has remained consistent since early childhood. It is called “The Roof Factor.” I am not lucid. In reality, I had thought about writing an entry on the concept. I focus on dreams about open ceilings and roof repair.

Before I was nine years old, I came to understand some dream features signified the level of consciousness. I noticed dreams featuring open ceilings were more likely to occur in a certain level of awareness, in a particular part of the sleep cycle, when my conscious self identity was present to a greater extent than in other dreams (more than when such as a porch is rendered to represent the waking space). Most open ceiling dreams feature my current address and most often have more common dream state indicators. (Most of my non-lucid dreams have less conscious self connections and distort in anachronistic composites of various places I have lived in the past). It validates a ceiling or roof as representing a specific level of consciousness in a similar way as a wall or fence in relating to liminal space division, though with viable threads of conscious self identity. That is even more so with dream state indicators such as beds in being potential exit points or focal points of emerging consciousness factors. (I do not typify a ceiling or roof as a dream state indicator, as it does not directly relate to bedrooms or beds).

I do a lot of writing and reading in my dream, going back over at least a dozen dreams with the roof factor. Eventually, I wake to feel vaguely annoyed at having “lost” all my writing. Experiencing a long dream while writing about them while not aware that I was dreaming was amusing and ironic.

There were more dream references here than in other dreams in recent memory. They had an interesting connection with the replacement of our roof in real life after the storm had torn it off over a month ago, which was the scariest event in our lives.

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Readability score: 61.

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Morning of December 20, 2017. Wednesday.



Bus to Bunk Beds

I am aware of a double-decker bus in our neighborhood where we presently live. It seems to be afternoon. I see it pass three different times. After it stops for a time on the street and about two houses east of our house, I discover it is mainly now made of the bunk beds of our two youngest sons. I am annoyed because it may take some time and work in getting it back in our house.

A singular vehicle, whether it is a bus, car, airplane, or boat, is typically a form of autosymbolism that stems from the illusory physicality of the dream state. In this case, it actually transitions to the dream state indicator of the bunk beds as further validation of how such autosymbolism forms in REM sleep, almost like a virtual reverse engineering of the dream sequence itself. This is quite common in my dreams and one of the factors that helped me understand dreams at a very early age.

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Lounge Room Enterprise

I am lying on the lounge room floor in the morning when I realize our lounge room “is” the USS Enterprise (NCC-1701 from the original “Star Trek” series). At times, I consider if I am inconveniencing the crew by lying near the captain’s chair (to its right). No one says anything or asks me to move or get up. Additionally, there is not a viable sense of traveling through outer space in this case, though it is not implied to be the television series set either. Looking up at our television, which seems mostly normal, it shows stars and what looks like small curly hairs moving toward the viewer, our television apparently serving as the Enterprise viewscreen.

This was similar to “Helicopter Not Landing Yet” (relative to its specific type of autosymbolism) from Christmas morning of 2016 and a number of other dreams since childhood. In such dreams, the vestibular system correlation associated with the illusory physicality of the dream state transmutes into a house or other building perceived as a vehicle, with various levels of ambiguity (including the essence of bilocation in some cases, which is common in my dreams). This includes dreams such as “Riding in a House Back to Arcadia”, where my Cubitis home travels down the highway as an oversized bus.

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“White Christmas” Not a Trigger

I hear lyrics from “White Christmas” (sitting in the lounge room of our present home, possibly hearing it from a radio or television), but I do not catch this dream state indicator, that is, the phrase “I’m dreaming”. Such dream state indicators rarely trigger lucidity and if anything, keep me relaxed on the passive side of RAS mediation, even though they have occurred throughout every sleep cycle for over 50 years. That is moot though, since I seem to think it is near June rather than December and see it as unusual in that way, as being “unseasonable”.

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Along with “Theme Park Drive with Zsuzsanna” and “The Roof Factor”, 5 of 12 regular dreams for this date are presently online. (By “regular”, I mean other than the numerous hypnagogic dreams at the beginning of each sleep cycle, which are typically too many to count or feasibly record.)

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Morning of December 19, 2017. Tuesday.



This dream occurred during the time we had been trying to sleep, early in the morning, with the roofers having worked on our house in reality, but during their break and when we fell asleep.

In my dream, there is a scene where one of the roofers is actually in our house and I see that he is watching Zsuzsanna sleep. I am not lucid. This annoys me very much, but he soon leaves. Meanwhile, I notice strange features hanging from the ceiling, about three feet from the floor. There are four of them, defining a square’s vertices. They look like vertically flat objects, seemingly made of material such as vinyl, but with the look of a chest of drawers. I do not consider this feature strange even though most of my conscious self identity is extant.

Later, I am looking through our clerestory windows and see two roofers (each one’s face through a different window, the first and third from the left). A lot of black smoke is coming from the first roof tier to the left. Apparently, it is coming from a power tool, but I am vaguely considered that it may be toxic. The other male is looking on. Both look at us at times. This has the essence of a false awakening, and the roofers are starting to make noise in real life by this point.

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This is a typical intruder dream triggered by real environmental sounds and vaguely perceived “intruders” at the time. However, they did not actually come into our house or watch us through our clerestory windows, as this is just the RAS (reticular activating system) mode that functions as such when one is unconscious. (Understanding dreams is not difficult despite most people bizarrely having no clue as to what a dream actually is). I am not lucid in this particular case. Chase dreams are of the same nature, also rendered by way of RAS, which renders the personified preconscious to alert the dreamer into waking, because waking is a biological necessity. It is that simple. (Some people do have too much stress, though, and as such, would likely rather to continue to sleep, which RAS simply will not allow out of biological need.)

Additionally, looking through a window represents the waking space (that is, the liminal space between dreaming and waking). The black smoke (a real-time symbol) symbolizes the nature of being asleep (and has occurred in other dreams as such, including a few positive, even blissful dreams). The unusual hanging features likely relate to the fact I am not “on the ground”. That is, it is a dream state indicator similar to that of “The Hanging Doll” in that it symbolizes my physical body being in bed, though is also linked to my dream’s distorted perception of the four roofers, and their temporary status of being on our home’s roof (as four “floating chests” that have very limited storage for “a longer stay”). I have always found it utterly bizarre that people do not seem to understand that what is going on in a dream is based on being in the dream state itself. How could so many people not be aware of something so obvious?

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The roofers in real life extended and built over our second-tiered roof (pretty much destroying the purpose of a clerestory roof) so that it now blocks the clerestory windows and only ugly rafters are visible. One even said he would come around and board them up from inside. Zsuzsanna told him no, but for people to even do things like this and suggest things like this means that something is apparently “missing” from their mind, an inability to think or understand anything (too much alcohol perhaps? In the DNA?). Zsuzsanna and I have conversations often about what is “missing” from so-called normal people.

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Morning of December 17, 2017. Sunday.



In my dream, I am in an unknown house, though my sister Marilyn (deceased) is present. It is not seemingly implied to be the Loomis Street house. She appears as she did in the 1960s. I have no recall of her deceased status.

I have the awareness that a laptop computer does not use 3.5-inch disks (and that they are old technology), and yet I have no viable memory of the last twenty years of my life. (Dreams are strange that way.) Marilyn does mention this game as not being compatible with her computer. There is a set of about seven disks that are needed to install and run the game.

Eventually, we somehow get the game to work. It is holographic, though also seemingly solid at times, and fills nearly half of the unknown room. Two spherical aquariums appear on each side of the playing field, near the center of each side, where other features appear on each end, though I am mostly only focused on the aquariums. The virtual aquariums are about three feet high, though elevated to about five feet from the floor with a stand.

Apparently, the game involves some sort of event when an anthropomorphic fish emerges from at least one of the aquariums, though no actual game play ensues. There are some resets of this dream where parts repeat, though much is not that clearly defined.

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An aquarium represents the mental model of the nature of the dream state (in real time). In this case, the two spherical aquariums symbolize the sleeping minds of Zsuzsanna and me. The anthropomorphic fish would represent the emergent consciousness “coming out of sleep”, sleep of which is symbolized as water.

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RAS quantizes the mental model of the dream state in this way at times, more so when sleep is somewhat restless or with “intrusive” environmental factors, based on the analogy of being in a fishbowl when outside noise is more intrusive into sleep, otherwise vaguely similar in waking transition symbolism to the very common water lowering waking symbolism (which has occurred at least once per normal sleeping period for over fifty years, since earliest memory).

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Morning of December 15, 2017. Friday.

Dream #: 18,624-02. 3 min 20 sec read.



Cubitis (irrelevant since 1978) is the first location of my dream, but snow and ice cover my Cubitis home's front yard. My dream self does not hold a recognition of this place, and snow and ice would have never been a feature. Cubitis occurs as an incidental setting rather than having associations with my childhood and teenage years.

I am vaguely aware of my conscious self's identity but not my current address or status. I am involved in a treasure hunt but not as a recognized participant. Laverne and Shirley, as the television characters from the original series, are key participants.

A vivid segment occurs with a life-size version of the Matchbox car Alvis Stalwart BP Exploration Vehicle. It approaches from the northwest and is functioning as a snowplow. It is nighttime. I am amazed by its size and power, though I am unsure who is driving it. (I know they are one of the treasure hunt participants.) The loud yet soothing noise it makes is vivid. I know I have to get to where the treasure might be before it catches up, though I am only walking fast. Despite the snow and ice, I do not feel cold. I walk briskly through an area toward the south, south of the front yard of the Cubitis house, and the headlights of the vehicle shine on me twice. I try to dodge their beam, yet I feel little concern. (This is a factor of being vaguely aware of daybreak and not wanting to wake yet.)

Eventually, although I am still outside, I arrive at a place that looks like a large hall of a house, though the implication is that it is an outside area. (Using a real-life comparison, it is about where the south neighbor's carport would have been.) I notice fast-food wrappers and some papers amidst piles of books and other items to my left. Laverne and Shirley seem confident about finding the treasure at this point. There may be a letter from someone, or another clue, revealing where it is.

I realize we are nearing the end of the area designated as part of the treasure hunt. I wonder if the exploration vehicle is still somewhere nearby. My dream's setting, which is still part of the outside treasure hunt, is now a bedroom, with at least one wall and part of the ceiling missing.

Laverne and Shirley become annoyed that the treasure may not exist. However, I soon notice an A4-size transparent plastic envelope that is full of shiny gold coins. It is vertically upright and pressed against the south wall just behind some other items. They look like Australian two-dollar coins, but I know they are twenty-dollar coins. Laverne and Shirley are sitting on the bed at this point. I give it to Laverne and soon notice another container of more gold coins. It resembles an A4-size plastic box that we keep documents in, though this one is more transparent. I ask Laverne if I can have some of them, not considering that they should all be mine, as I am the one who found them. She cheerfully agrees I should have some of them. I awake while looking at the supposed twenty-dollar coins sliding out of the first container onto the center of the bed, ready to be counted. (The bed's orientation is from east to west. Its association with where it would be in the setting from where my dream started is unknown.)

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The "Laverne & Shirley" influence is mainly a metacognitive association with dreaming from hearing the opening theme song so often. It mostly corresponds with the lyrical line, "got a dream and we just know now." "Reaching a bed" has been a fundamental ending to my dreams since childhood, for the self-evident reason I am a metacognitive dreamer.

Coins have often featured in my dreams since childhood, from summoning somatosensory dynamics. (It is from wanting to enhance or stabilize my sense of touch while in the dream state, but I also had a silly belief when I was very young that I could pull a coin from out of the dream state). Noticing the sense of touch is one dynamic when emerging from REM atonia.

The ambiguity of dream settings and their countless composites of unrelated locations, their continually transforming attribute, and consciously unresolvable indoor-outdoor ambiguity (perception of being in an indoor and outdoor area simultaneously), and partial renderings in otherwise undefined space, is wholly unlike waking life or any factor of reality or memory.

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The Matchbox car I dreamt of yesterday (the flatbed truck with a house on the back, listed as "Truck with Site Office," though there were two in that dream of different colors), and the Matchbox car appearing here as a life-size vehicle (listed as "Alvis Stalwart" BP Exploration Vehicle), are number 60 and 61 (appearing in my dreams on consecutive days). The sequence may be coincidental or residual thoughts of a dreaming experience from the previous day, integrating into a new dream.

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