side notes

Note: I was stranded for an hour in Didsbury while my family (Dad brother) went to the rec center. I was hungry and was dropped off at Tim Hortons to have a meal. On walking towards the rec center a white SUV drove past me and the woman driving by looked like Jamie, and she was smiling at me (With teeth)! I could have sworn she did a drive by at the end of the summer but was in a rickety brown SUV. Maybe not the same person, or maybe I'm imagining things? Maybe she traded in her old vehicle? So, we've gone from pretending I don't exist, to, drive bys and stealing glances to, driving by and smiling. What's the next step? waving? Not a joke or sarcasm. Slowly but surely... <----- positive dots!!!

Dream 1

Me and Jamie are in a car and we are pulling up to fas gas in olds. That's it.

Dream 2

Dreaming from Jamie's perspective, I'm in a house and I'm looking out a window waiting until someone pulls. I feel like a real estate agent in this dream.

Dream 3

I walk into a large room with all these colorful lights enhanced by a smoke machine. (If you've ever been to the mirror museum exhibit in chinook mall this is exactly what it was like)Jamie is in the room but she is gigantic and laying on the floor. I'm only as tall as the width of one of her legs. That's it I just walk in and that's it.

At least one or two other dreams of Jamie not even a fraction of a second long.

Psych ward

I live in a psych ward or retreat (Definitely where I belong btw.) I'm friends with an older brown haired woman. We both smoke and get eachother smokes or something. She wears a ponytail and wears glasses. Eventually her time ends and her husband picks her up and I'm sad. I sulk around after she leaves and the dream ends.

Oh no

I did pray about dreaming sexual things about other women, and hence this explains the influx of Jamie dreams. However this morning, I dreamed I was going to meet this girl I met off Tinder or something. I'm in a strange apartment building, I find her room number which is 316 or something. I go in and everything is pitch black. Being in a pitch black place in a dream just wakes me up.

Some people have messaged me and/or left comments asking "Who is Jamie?" I understand my journal entries must seem like the ravings of a madman, I can assure you, I consider it a possibility every single day. Jamie is someone I use to work with in 2011, We were friends (the vocal pretext we had both agreed upon- the subtext however... slightly different story). Long complicated story I'm not going into. to the layman, (Someone who is completely atheist and is a scoffer at anything spiritual, or having anything like a god in the universe, supernatural, paranormal. etc) I suffer from a bizarre form of Limerence, and "Spiritual psychosis", and Jamie is the Idealized object of this. In more spiritual terms it is also known as "Twin Flame," or "Alien Love bite", Neither term I agree with, however I have read experiences from many people that I can relate to ( I watched a long youtube of a panel of people from the ALB community and listened to a couple explain how they were having mutual or shared dreams). Scoffers will scoff, fine. I define it simply as: Seemingly paranormal facilitation and interference in human relationships. There's also a psychosis in the mix as well, BPD, Both of us have levels of such a disorder. In my case I love bomb someone who shows interest in me and when I feel they are going to abandon me, I promptly dump them or cut them out of my life, and then horrifyingly try to "Win them back,". I was not even aware of this "Cycle," until I met Jamie and analyzed our friendship years later, and reading what BPD is.

Years after, the "Discarding" of one another. I began experiencing paranormal events all over again. Seeing annoying "Angel signs," regarding her. As well as a sudden influx of dreams about her. I have a long history on this forum being able to share dreams with people. And i Still experience this to this day, the sharing of dreams. I began to wonder if it was a possibility, that we were somehow reaching one another in dreams. Such phenomena increased with such intensity (and things jamie was doing and saying in dreams) It became such a great concern to me that I was compelled to send her a handful of messages over a period of a few months. I told her from as many angles as I could what stuff I was experiencing. Just being open and relaying messages that I had learned. After the first message, In the dreams of her, she began to first act repulsed by me in the dreams and then began to be more okay with it. And after my last long explanatory message the dream her seemed fine. I did relay in my message that this dream journal exists, and that she can read it. These dream journals have a subscribe button, (I don't get notified of subscribers) and such people get an email every time I post an entry. It's likely I gave her a link to my dream journal when we were friends in 2011, and she has been subscribed since then. Or a few years ago she did. I'm not going to speculate. But it definitely seems like she reads my dream journal and then in later dreams she will react to what I dreamed about. She has never messaged me back however, But did mark my message as, "Read." sometimes she would leave a message, "Unread" So I take it as a sign of minimal respect for my efforts. In the end she has a disorder, where various people are discarded, and most of those people will never be in touch again. so no, I am not expecting a message back, or for her to be friends again. We both have some severe emotional problems that would probably end in complete disaster, or worse, all over again, if not handled EXTREMELY carefully.

Unfortunately, I have had to move back to the area where I met her. and it's possible I may have run into her when I first arrived here, at a convenience store. The person, had to turn around and leave the store, after their purchase and I was standing in. She didn't look me in the eye at all, seemed slightly aware that it was me. but looked really pissed or at least annoyed that I was there. I was not surprised at this reaction at all, I even expected it, given what I know about the disorder. and then a few times over a few months. she had driven by me at least once or twice and was stealing glances at me. No, I don't imagine she is stalking me. This IS a series of small towns where you are bound to run into anyone you ever known in this area at any given day.

This journal then is for Jamie to read as she sees fit. As long as I dream about her, I will keep posting entries.

Dreams

1. Jamie, is tied to a wall in a hotel room... she is naked. and some guy is standing near her. He had glasses, hair poorly bleached with brown hair at the part.

that's all I remember. I wake up and The voice says,, "Why was I naked?"

2. I dream my dog is getting really angry at me because I am playing with a cat. His mouth looked really strange and scary.

3. I was in bed with someone, But it was this other girl, from Wal-mart. She is pregnant I start kissing her and she kisses me back. A strange thought of doubt runs through my head.

I wake up. and fall back asleep.

Note: it seems the past few weeks, I have been unable to meet Jamie in the dreams lately just have dreams about her. We both seem to have been dreaming about people who are "Distractions". The goal: to prevent us dreaming the same dream. I will pray and/or meditate on this.

Jamie dreams.

most of this was HH. Where I am awake, falling asleep, but briefly fall into a dream segment.
1. It's birds eye view and I'm driving to Sundre, Vision zooms out and Jamie is in her vehicle waiting.
2. Jamie is driving by the street I use to live on and she is kinda missing those times...
Umm okay, so she's stalking me now? I don't know, but maybe try actually talking to me instead of driving by once every a couple of months and stealing glances at me, pretending that I don't notice. You know I once worked at a south wal mart in Lethbridge, where a Manager, who was a total Bi*** use to bully me and give me write ups if I retaliated. which, ultimately led to me quitting. Was she done after I quit? NO, I started working at a Mcdonalds, and a few times while cleaning up the parking lot she would drive right through the parking lot and not park or buy anything. She started showing up at the 711 I use to go to on the north side even though she lived on the south. Even tried to say hi to me, in the lineup. She thankfully stopped after a few months of me not giving her an in.
3. I'm hearing a song I know, It's that annoying 80's song that can get stuck in your head for weeks. "It must have been love." by Roxette (RIP). Jamie is tonelessly singing it and making the lyrics about me. the only line I can articulate is "Touch me now," but she sings it ."Robert now.". Kind of makes me laugh and cringe at the same time. If she were to construct a parody of this song about me, I have an idea for some of the chorus, "It must of been Rob, But he's older now. I said he was good, But I lost him somehow. It must of been Rob, but I'm older now. We didn't even touch, 'Cause the time had run out." and I swear If Jamie doesn't sing this to me with full passion, we aint a thing

Other dreams.

1. I get lost in a house, that has another house secretly inside it. Some guy is leading me through a very specific set of doors. We wind up at this landing with a strange latter. I climb down the ladder and find myself outside around some interesting houses and a highway.
2. Im with a bunch of people in a mall. I'm building minecraft blocks for some reason, even though I never play the game. later we are in a strange cafeteria but the lights aren't on. Me and some people hide in some strange cubicles. and my old friend from mcdonald's (Who I had one confirmed shared dream with) David jumps out and goes "Bah," to scare us, he manages to stay on one foot in a comical almost about to grab you pose. And then darts away. I go to look for him but he is gone...

Apologies for not updating recently, The wifi at home is worse than dial up. Can't even load a webpage to update my dj.

Jamie dream (Almost a month ago?) I was standing outside somewhere with some family and saw my aunt smoking and standing by her Dodge caravan. Now I know she doesn't smoke so i'm really perplexed. I go to confront her on this. Someone calls behind me I look and at the end of the driveway is a woman with long brown hair and eyes light grey like a wolf. She's waving me down but somehow I don't recognize her, but I'm still focused on why my aunt is smoking so, I ignore the woman's "Ooh ooh, over here." and continue talking to my aunt. It wasn't until I woke up I realized it was a visit from Jamie.

Second dream I am furiously writing Jamie a really long Facebook message... Dear God, I sincerely hope I never have to do that again. It's been 5 years?!?!?!? Since I did such a thing and no response indicates that she likely doesn't want one either.

Dreams this week.

1. In this one I go to this park forest area in the middle of a city and hang out with people in the middle of the night. very vague on the rest of the details

2. Some skanky looking younger woman indicates she wants me to sleep with her. I take her number somewhat reluctantly, because i seem to be horny enough. But later in the dream and just message her that I'm no longer interested since I already have a girl coming in. (I think in the dream I was expecting Jamie to come into my life suddenly.

3. I am on a roadtrip in the middle of the night. I'm tired so I find an abandoned hospital looking place to stay the night in. While there a couple pulls up to spend the night as well. It's Victoria and her boyfriend (The victoria I worked with that didn't die from covid )

4. I find myself on a Date with a girl from India. We just get along really nicely. Can't remember much. just that she was leaning against a railing, we got talking and went for a coffee or something.

Seems like most of the dreams were trying to distract me from finding Jami in a dream... hmmm.

Let's start with... Jamie Dreams! There have been a few.

1st: Vague dream where we might have been kissing or something.
2nd dream: I wasn't lucid but understood the dream world so to speak. I was sitting in a living room with people. My dead cousin Kiah since 2021, popped up and was like, "hey, hello..." etc. And I asked her, "Can you do something for me? I need you to check someone name Jamie for me. She was supposed to show today but I can't find her." I specifically remember saying to Kiah to, "Just go through my memories, You'll find her." Kiah pulled a curtain made of nothing out of nowhere and wrapped herself in it making her disappear.
Dream skips to where Kiah comes back and says that she had seen Jamie bragging someone that she had a "dream of only," boyfriend. (referring to me, also hinting that Jamie doesn't actually plan to talk to me in person ever. Which is pretty bad in my view, how about I just don't post dreams anymore about this subject. Me, I want a future without this insanity. I'm pretty sure Jamie can find loads of simps to stroke her ego because they think they have a chance. I'm not one of them. seriously.)

I ask Kiah to show me. We teleport to some weird wannabe Harry Potter dream world. There's an english school. We go in. I'm in a role I think I've played before in this scenario. I'm in a teachers or principals office. 2 people are talking about a conspiracy or something. I just lose interest as Jamie's not around.

This morning: Jamie at a funeral being sad, Second funeral dream about Jamie hm...

Too many other dreams to really write down. Scariest one being I kept going into an elevator that would take me to a dark hallway where people were sleeping. A vampire would come by and kill them. not in the typical vampire way... In a way that's impossible do describe, you'd only have to dream it. (Raven if you still read these, try dream viewing this one. might be an exciting dream supernatural scenario that you're recently fond of) The guy would like teleport inside their skin and/or behind them, causing them to choke to death on a most horrific way. The guy seemed unaware of me. I saw this happen a couple times. I was also semi lucid at times.

Driving dreams... almost crashing a LOT. Driving up and down impossible hills.

One dream I had a really angry roommate or something. Walk on eggshells kind of guy.

Recently moved reluctantly to my old area.

one HH vision of Jesus's crown of thorns, or like a giant version of it lain down on the property where I live. It was all over the shrubs and stuff.

2 Jamie dreams: I'm at a convenience store (the one I was in the other day where I spotted a Jamie Look a like - I say that because mysteriously running her look a likes is a common occurrence for me, especially in convenience stores.) in the dream Jamie has a huge hole in her chest. I'm then dreaming from two perspectives - one as Me trying to stop her chest from bleeding so much - The other from her perspective laying on the ground in shock all the blood pouring out and I'm fading out. As I fade out so does the dream.

Second dream: I go into the convenience store again. The person in front of me turns around and I am seeing a T-shirt (Metallica- Ride The Lightning). I look up and the face is of Jamie smiling. And that's all I remember of that one.

I'll try not to take these occurrences too seriously unless I know all the facts.

Vague other dreams: One where I run into a gut I use to work with in Canmore.

The other dream I ran into my cousin, who I use to live with but nothing memorable happened.

Jamie 1

A dream where she's leaning over a bed or something like she's been praying??? and she is saying to me, "I plan to reach out to you."

Ok. Heard that one before...

Dream 2

A dream that I was with Lucifer. But it was the one from ."Supernatural." (like the actor who plays him tho. He's ina ll my favorite shows, Dexter and LOST.) He was threatening something can't remember what.

Jamie 2

Another Jamie dream but I can't remember what it was about.

Lucid with Jamie but not sure.

I was walking outside of my house? Became lucid randomly. It was night out. I realized I wanted to find Jamie. I had passed a car previously. I turned around to find it but it was gone. I went to the driveway a bit past where the car was parked. A Really old red VW Beetle was parked there (Days later in waking life on the face book swap/n/buy for my are an old red VW beetle was listed. precog dream???). I checked my pocket and had a key. The key looked like an old house key. I acted as if it as the car key. I sat down in the car found a place for the key to turn and went through the motions of starting the car and it worked. I drove downtown in a generic dream city that was like calgary or parts of Toronto. I started saying Jamie's full name out loud.

Came to a basket ball court. Saw a Woman standing there with pink dyed hair and brown eyes. Didn't quite look like Jamie but the feeling was that it was her. I pulled up and said Hop in. Jamie looked at me with recognition, and got in the car. Initiated a casual greeting kiss. She acted natural with it. i was very lucid and started with questions. I asked, "Do you read my dreams?" She said "no." and i was shocked at the answer. But it wasn't her anymore. I was talking to a little yappy dog. and it was speaking a different language. I kept asking the same question. It said something like :Yes, and then : no. i was pretty flustered and woke up.


Putin

Yes, because of the war I started having these dreams while falling asleep. First is a black area and I just see Putin's face. He is angry and says, "I will push with this war into World war 3." Then i can see an explosion reflected in his eyes and then his face.

Second dream he had barbed wire around his neck and is choking. From sanctions no doubt?

All the dreams this week weren't good.

Jamie 1

Jamie seemed mad at me. Telling me she's never going to talk to me again... I think I always knew that deep down. But one can hope.

Jamie 2

Some nights later Dreamed I saw her at a bar but she was avoiding me.

Map

I'm looking at map of where I live. There's a road east and west. South is Lethbridge. Under my town is shaded dark red. above the down is a lighter red. There are words describing each shaded region but I forget what. There is an icon on the east end of town it is a face of a native american with a red bandana. He looks sinister and the dream implies he's cursed this region. (IWL, It has been snowy and icy and I have called in at work too much not wanting to drive these roads. This dream was a day before the snowfall, Felt that the drean predicted this???)

Don't drive

One one of the days I was going to go to work (but called in anyway) I had a series of dreams of dogs biting me and people fighting me.

Dream 1

I was in my house and a bunch of dogs that looked like my dog were trying to bite me. I had a razor and cut on of the dogs legs. It yelped and started bleeding everywhere on it's hind leg. Asuka and maybe data were there I asked them for a rage and something to tie it with to stop the bleeding.

Dream 2

Someone was on the front end of my house with a gun. I was in a garage behind a white van. I got a peek at the intruder and aimed my pistol or something at him. I shot him and it hit.

Dream 3

I was fighting someone on stairs. It was Gary, a friend from childhood who ignores me now. I Was hitting him with some pole and he stopped trying to fight me after he fell down the stairs. I asked, "Are you done?" He said, "Yes." I asked him "Why don't you talk to us anymore?" He looked shocked. I said, "I don't even do drugs or drink hardly at all." And he still looked shocked and seemed to be considering what I was saying. Then I woke up.
After I woke up I found that the rods that were clear before were snowy and icy again...

Dark Hogwarts

I was getting off the Hogwarts express with a bunch of children in cloaks. I was young like them. Everything was so dark even with the lights, it was nightime nd I couldn't see much. I saw the Cone shapes of the tops of the Hogwarts towers as I was walking along but coult still barely see them.

Jamie

Just a dream with her in it. Can't remember any context. She was just around and really seemed happy to see me.

ok

A couple dreams about some other girl I used to work with.

Lost?

Dream about being lost in some big house and my uncle was there?

Can't remember much detail for any of these dreams...

Church.

Had a dream I was sleeping in some old church or something. A girl was with me. i flew up to the ceiling though I wasn't lucid. I had a little room with a bed set up. We ate something. She was a white girl with red hair??? anyway we flew somewhere else and wound up in a stairwell that was also an elevator. We couldn't climb because of a construction crew? So we somehow jumped up past them and into a hallway. Wound up in some room and She was playing a piano... but was sitting on top of it and playing the keys reversed. She made this amazing sounding music and I felt live falling in love. Then we got up and left somewhere.

No kids

Another dream where a young girl asks me about sex or something. And i get kinda pissed off and say that children should not do that. It's really damaging to them, physically and plus lifelong emotional disorders. And i said that the adult in that case would get thrown in jail and murdered by inmates with children, so it's no good for anyone involved. Really odd dream to have.

End of the world.

I'm driving with my brother. At first we see a huge volcano in the distance going off. And I get really scared. As we drive into calgary I see a bunch of nuclear missiles from North Korea in the sky. My brother just laughs and says nothing is going to happen. I forget what happened after.

No jamie dreams.

Crazy

Was on a dirt road outside some restaurant. Went inside there was a group there. They were being really noisy. Some strange bald Native American girl started attacking me for no reason. Her head was shaped like the people in "Coneheads." The group pulled her off me and they all left the building. I went outside angry and everyone from the group was in a large green bus. They talked to me for a bit and then pulled out of the driveway.
I saw someone at the other side of a pond watching me. He seemed familiar like someone I work with and I called to him. His face distorted and i became lucid. I kept telling him I knew him and that this was a dream. eventually he walked away and the dream ended.

I don't know Why I waste so many lucids on telling people that it is a dream...

Wrong

I was in some living room when a young girl came up to me and said I could touch her. I was like, "wait. How old are you? Can I see some ID?" or something she answered twice both times giving a different age. Both were underage answers and I felt like this was a bad situation That I should just leave. I remember getting up to leave and that's where the dream ends.

Jamie?

A dream with Jamie in it. She seemed a lot taller than I remember, and she wasn't talking to me or happy with me? not sure.

Victoria

A dream about the other Victoria I used to work with... An old co worker came up to me in some office building hallway and told me that the other Victoria has just passed. I was really shocked. Note: I follow her as friends on fb. She hasn't been online for like 6 days. I'm not even gonna go there...

Island

Really crazy dream about a really small island on a lake. I was with some people. A woman with brown hair. Jamie or Asuka, couldn't tell. And maybe two others. The dream island manifested Giant animal spirits of people. Talking like King kong Giant. One guy stepped on and there was a large ape like king kong. Someone else manifested a giant lizard. I stepped on and a giant green cobra came out of the ground. The brown haired woman stepped on and another giant cobra sprang from the ground... Only it had 3 heads!!! The island itself was like only 50 feet wide, so the animals keep trying to fight, but when one of us gets knocked from the island by the creature it vanishes, and when we go back on it, the monster comes back. So we keep getting knocked off the island and running back on. Lots of crazy fights going on.

Data

Was outside a house at night time. Apparently it was my house. I walked up and the porch light is on and Data walks out the front door. Data from Star Trek. His pale skin looks painted on. I can't believe it's him. He greets me like he knows me and I just can't believe it.

I wake up and remember That in my inner world house. I do have a character named Data who lives there. Although in a decade this is the first time I actually have seen him as the character. Usually he's very vague in image, like a shadow. I sometimes think he has glasses on.

Looking for Jamie

Became lucid on something like a greyhound bus. Decided to look for Jamie since she's been AWOL for a while now, briefly showing up here and there, for all i know she could be dead or something and i'd never know. I go up to the bus driver and ask if he knows where Jamie is? He says no. I look around the bus to ask someone else but it's empty. The dream starts going dark a bit. I step down the front steps to the door. To the right of the door as a panel. I imagine removing the panel will take me to another dream space. I take the panel off and slowly step through. I wound up in a large house that appears to be under construction. All the walls are made of plywood and not drywall, and is not painted. The floors are all plywood but clean as in prepped for flooring. I wonder if i can use this place as a dream to find more hidden houses inside hidden rooms. Like a dream that goes on forever and all I do is explore endless houses strung together. I guess Jamie has slipped my mind by now. The dream starts to fade. I try and prolong the dream by leaning on one knee, placing my hand on the floor and counting the spaces between my fingers with one eye closed, (as per Hukif/Walm's suggestion) i start counting. I don't even get to 10 before the distortions start pulling me from the dream forcing me to wake up. I usually try to jump and escape them which usually makes the dream black and then it snaps back with super clarity. But not this time. I feel myself jumping but slightly hitting a ceiling and then I wake up.

Victoria

A dream about my friend who died of covid at the end of august... She was facebook messaging me. She knows she's dead in the dream and she kept saying sorry and that she was embarrassed that she died so suddenly...

Another death

I see a woman with brown hair at a funeral. I have a feeling it's Jamie, because of the way she doesn't acknowledge me. She's not here for me, She's here for someone she knows that passed on. It's an odd viewing. The casket is open but on a conveyor belt. (side note: I absolutely hate Viewings. The person is gone, with Jesus, or in hell, or showing up on celebrity ghost stories or something, That body is not them. You know on TV shows when they have viewings? And the person's face is all perfect? Well, it usually isn't, The muscles that hold the face together aren't working and their cheeks just sag down.) Anyway, in the dream the casket rolls by me and Jamie. Her cold ,I'm not really here, gaze breaks and she starts tearing up. She holds onto me and I give her a hug while she cries. Well I guess she knew I was there after all..

Jamie

Just a dream that she was in some city driving around and looking for me. I live in picture butte now, so if she was really looking for me in my previous city she wouldn't find me.

Victoria

Difficult dream to recall. I was dreaming she was outside her apartment taking selfies. But she mood of the dream was sick, like she was sickly and/or dying.

*Not a dream* I woke up from that dream last Saturday to a message from Victoria ( an old co worker who I was close friends with). she was telling me she came down with Covid. I asked how severe? and she didn't respond. A few days later just before a night shift I read on Facebook she had just died. She was 36... my age, with underlying health problems. Was this dream prescient?

Various other dreams i can't recall. One involded my car getting stolen. Driving around with my uncle, and dreaming about the Trinity Killer from Dexter season 4.