memorable

Last night I finally had two lucid dreams! I was following my normal routine according to my dream goals, and was starting to feel a little disappointed since I have been trying hard to have a lucid dream for 8 days now with no success. Every time I manage a DEILD I feel so much hope like I will be able to WILD now. Actually experiencing a transition helps me to know that it's possible!

End of a long non lucid dream I don't care about remembering, but at the end of it I was trapped in a parking garage with a large grizzly momma bear. At first I saw a bear in the distance, and I was hoping it wouldn't notice me, then I look down at my feat and see a baby bear that looks friendly. But I know that momma bears are very aggressive about protecting their babies and a lot of attacks happen around these type of misunderstandings. Anyway I look back towards the mom and of course she has noticed me and thinks I have taken her baby and starts charging me. I was terrified, I have a dream phobia about being attacked by bears, and I remembered that being attacked by a bear is one of my dream signs and BOOM

Right when I realize that being attacked by a bear is a dream sign I become low level lucid and a totally new dream forms around me with a pop. I am in an apartment complex like I lived in as a kid and am standing around the community pool. I do the usual lucid things noticing how beautiful it looks and all that then I remembered that I wanted to try to practice having waking life self-awareness and memory as well as try to emotionally experience a true non-dual perspective in a lucid dream. I was able to practice my self awareness and memory check like I do in waking life, and I felt like at the time I strongly knew it was a dream, and had some waking life self awareness. When I thought "this is all me, this dream all comes from me" I had like a brief flash of vividness, like everything in the dream pulsed with a color change briefly then went back to normal.

Then as I was looking around I realized that there are no dream characters here, and I am all alone. I have a dream goal to talk to a "real" person in my dreams, and maybe meet a dream guide or find someone who wants to go on an adventure with me. So I start trying to call out "is there anyone who can answer my questions?" "Is there anyone who will talk to me?" and after asking two or three times I hear someone say "sure well talk with you" behind me and I spin around and the two girls from my last lucid dream are walking towards me! This is exciting for me because this is the first recurring lucid dream characters I have ever had! They are the same height, maybe 5'10, and I again have the impression that they are sisters. One of them has blond hair, pulled up in a pony tail, and is the one who does all the talking in this dream. The other sister has silky black hair, and always stands in my peripheral vision so I don't ever get a real good look at her.

I am very excited that they are here so I hurry over to them feeling like rushed like I have a million questions to ask and I can already feel myself starting to wake up a little, I know its going to last a couple more minutes at best like my other DILDS because I catch lucidity as I am waking up.

I ask the blond sister "How can I get lucid more often" and she smiles indulgently at me as this is the third time I have asked her this question. In my last lucid I asked her this question I remember feeling like her answer was revolutionary and brilliant while listening to it, but couldn't remember one word of what she said when I woke up, so I really paid attention this time. She said "The most important thing is to develop/have a lucid mindset... and more words I didn't understand she is continuing to speak but its over my head". Because I was really paying attention I can tell that I am not really understanding what she is saying anymore, so I interrupt her and ask "wait, what exactly does it mean to have a lucid mindset? What SHOULD I be focusing on? What emotions should I be feeling? HOW?"

At this point the dream is starting to fade. She looks a at me a little exasperated that I interupted her, and then she looks over my shoulder and stops speaking and just kind of smiles at me in a kind way. This is something I am noticing that when my dreams are ending whoever I'm talking to looks over my shoulder and its like they see something that confirms to them I'm about to wake up, they usually just stop talking and give me that friendly maybe see you later smile. Then the dream ends

I remember that I can try and DEILD. I focus on laying still as I wake up. I have some fear about forgeting my first lucid dream if I try to DEILD and it fails and I wake up in a non lucid so I briefly remember the previous dream as I focus on not moving.

When I wake up, get back to my body, I still feel very sleepy and I feel like a DEILD will be successful, I feel like the dream is just below my bed and if I relax strongly enough I will just sink into it. So I just totally let go of my body, like totally limp bone, like if I was standing I would just turn into a puddle on the ground, and I get a strong falling feeling like I am sinking through my bed. I feel like I am falling into the dream beneath my bed, like it is a giant bubble, the surface of the bubble is a brilliant white light and as I sink through it it feels very peaceful and I totally cannot real my waking life body AT ALL at this point. I sink through the white light and BOOM

I am back in the apartment complex of the last dream again. I think holy crap I did it, that was totally a WILD transition and I made it into a dream! I am in the office next to the pool area. I look out the window and see the two sisters are still here sitting in reclining pool chairs relaxing under an umbrella. I run out to them and they are excited to see me. I go up to the blond one who was talking before and she sits up in the chair goes cross legged and turns to face me ready to answer questions, I thought she looked very cute sitting like that and was happy that she was excited to see me, and willing to answer questions.

I am lucid still at this point, but less strongly so. I forgot to do any stabilizing in this dream and didn't bring my waking awareness or memory with me as strongly as I thought. I didn't think to do any checking since I knew it was a WILD transition, but next time I'll know that even then my awareness needs a recharging in the dream. I know I wasn't as strongly lucid because this next conversation bit is fuzzier in my memory.

I ask her "do you believe there are things in dreams that do not come from me" I don't remember her exact answer but I remember she looked like it was a subject that she didn't really want to talk about but she did say yes.

At this point the dream was ending and I could feel myself waking up. I got close to her and I knew that I really wanted to remember her words this time, so I told her "crap I'm waking up, can you do a review in like five seconds please!"

She nodded and said "first develop a lucid mindset, then well find out what your name means" I interrupt at this point and say "huh we didn't do that" she continues "then well do a tarot card reading" I interrupt again and say "we didn't do that either!" Then for the first time the other sister speaks, she is standing at my left shoulder "you are confusing him" I look toward her to see her face but before I do I notice she is pointing with her finger, and it felt like she was controlling my focus with her finger because I started to look where she was pointing, and it was like I could notice something that I couldn't before because she was helping me to focus. And I noticed that the first sister had a beanie on and across her forehead stitched on the beanie it said "Tarra" and the second sister said "see thats her name" and so I asked Tarra what her sisters name was and she said "she's Skippy" like the board game risk. No idea what that means.

Welp mark the date. I joined dreamviews on March 13 of 2013, and last night after nearly a solid year of practice I FINALLY had a good long lucid dream!

I had 2 10 minute DEILD's and 2 15-20 minute WILD's. There is way to much information from such long dreams to record them in my normal fashion of writing down everything I can remember, that would take forever.

I am just going to record snippets of my favorite one. I feel like I've had a real break through so hopefully I will be able to keep having amazing lucids!

Dream One: Leaving Reality

I am woken up by my dog barking in the middle of my afternoon nap. I don't move at all and focus on transitioning back into a dream. My body quickly falls back asleep and I am able to transition into a lucid dream.

I am in my grandparents house in my bed (not where I am actually taking my nap). I am tempted to waste ANOTHER lucid on sexy time but I remember some of my other dream goals and resist. I explore the house for a while and test my lucidity. This goes on for like five minutes. I am so amazed at the power of the mind. The dream house I am in so closely resembles the real house that it is crazy. I wonder around and appreciate the vividness and clarity of the house for a while.

Then I head outside. The farm is just as vivid and clear as the house had been. There is snow on the ground just like in RL and the trees and forest are so pretty.

I walk out into the yard and again just appreciate lucidity. This is the first lucid I have ever had where I didn't feel rushed at all. I KNEW that the dream would last, and so I was able to take large chunks of time to look around and enjoy the moment. I probably stood in the yard for another couple minutes just looking around.

Then I remembered that I wanted to try to leave "my dream bubble" like Hyu explains in his tutorial on forming persistent realities. I have tried this before but my lucidity was never strong enough to actually do it and I was always woken up or flung back to the ground.

This time I look up at the sky and think of rising up and leaving not just the planet, but my own dream bubble. Hyu believes that to really form persistent realities you have to actually make your brain believe that you are no longer in your own dreams, like it is REAL. The point is not weather or not I think I can actually leave with my consciousness out of my own dreams into a place that is REAL. The point is that if I can convince my brain that I have then the dream will feel like it is REAL.

I fly rapidly up into the sky and up into space. Then I pass into the black void and keep flying imagining that I am leaving my own dreams. I pass through a gray layer and then pop into a space of the black void with nothing but shining balls of light around me. Just like Hyu describes in this place I have no body, I am pure consciousness. I imagine the balls of light around me are other REAL realities that I can visit, each with their own story.

I am so pleased to have finally made it to this place that for a while I just float around in the void. It feels SO peaceful and SO blissful, it is wonderful. Then I start looking for a ball of light to join.

I choose the smallest one I can see (don't know why, I will choose a big one next time). I start willing myself towards it, and I start rushing through the void to the small light. It is farther away than I had imagined, I have to really focus on moving quickly and getting there because it is so far away.

Then I see that I am very close and I am going to make it! When I get there I pass through a light barrier and see a gray bubble that I believe represents the reality I wanted to join.

But I am traveling so quickly that I fly right past it and I think that I missed it!

But then it feels like I have transitioned into a dream again and I am in the most vivid dreamscape I have ever been in. It is crazy vivid!

I have a body again, I am standing on a patch of grass between two tin sheds. Unfortunately I don't have much time to appreciate the scene because to hummers full of troops pull up on either side of the sheds and I see men pointing at me and saying "there he is get him!"

Then men start pouring out of the hummers and chasing me. I have no where to run to and so I start to panic a little bit. Before I loose lucidity I notice that there is a superman, like literally superman with the cape and the S and everything, sitting in the back seat of each hummer. Then I see a man point at superman and then at me, I can't hear what he said but I was terrified that they were sicking superman on me!

Then I lost lucidity and woke up.

So I know that this is probably a huge wall of text now. Just imagine that this was literally one of four dreams I had of this length!

I am hoping that I have made a huge breakthrough and that I am able to return to the black void with the lights of different realities in them again in future lucids, though I don't think I will go back to the same one!

Even though I'm not going to record the other dreams I remembered I did want to mention some conversations I had with DC's. In two of my other dreams I had conversations that felt completely normal to me with DC's, which is weird because normally my DC's are really dumb and slow. In the lucids the DC's I was talking to felt completely real to me, and I didn't realize that was weird until I woke up and was thinking about it. I just wanted to also mention that I hope I have such interesting and "real" DC's in my future lucids also!

Well, I think I'm at a place where I can start dream journaling again!

Back in August I started up a Masters program and that has pretty much taken over my life. Now, three months later I am finally stating to adjust to the new crazy pace of life. As school started up I never lost my interest in dreaming or lucid dreaming, I just didn't have the time or energy to keep up with this journal.

Now that I am adjusting I would really like to start recording my dreams again. It is so cool to look back and read dreams that I have absolutely NO memory of ever having, dreams are just the coolest!

My Dream Goals
- Form persistent realities (Meet a recurring dream character)
- Improve my dream recall
- Complete the Task of the Month
- Have Fun! And enjoy learning to dream again!

Dream goal for the rest of November: Record 4 lucid dreams, 2 per week.

Technique: So... I decided that I don't like my new DJing style. Looking back and only seeing the number of dreams does not give me any since of satisfaction. I want to know what the dreams were about!

But, I still don't want to take the time to write out each of my non-lucid dreams. I am going to compromise with myself and instead of writing each dream out, and rather than just recording the # of dreams, I will give each dream a title and a short description.

Dream One: FBI Ice Skating

I am on an FBI sting and sneak up and steal from some people by ice skating.

Dream Two: Power Puff Girls

I wasn't actually a PPG. I was however a female super hero and my environment felt kind of corny, but still cool like the PPG's.

Technique Update: As I was waking up I felt the tail end of the last dream and became lucid for just a moment. I am starting to really recognize the "feeling" you get from becoming lucid and realizing your dreaming.

I felt all feeling from my RL body kind of fade away, and I start to feel instead what my dream body is feeling. I can kind of feel my awareness sink into my head if that makes any since. Then I can really engage the dream with my logical mind active.

This morning, because I am starting to recognize the feeling, I was able to hold onto it for a while after I had actually woken up. I stayed perfectly still and really I was trying to DEILD, but I was to awake to fall back asleep so I was awake but still "very in my head".

I was reviewing my dreams while in this state for recall purposes, and it was fantastic. It was like being on the cusp of DEILDing and running through my dreams again so that I could remember them.

My Dream Goals
- Learn to DILD or DEILD three to four times per week
- Form persistent realities (Meet a recurring dream character)
- Improve my dream recall
- Complete the Task of the Month
- Have Fun! And enjoy learning to dream again!

Dream Goal Update: Become more familiar with the "lucid feeling" because I think that it will help me become lucid more frequently both in DILD and DEILD efforts.

Technique: Total sleep time = 8 hours.

Last night I feel like I made real progress. In my hunt to become lucid I had allowed my desire and expectation to make me feel rushed and anxious. Not only did this give me horrible sleep, but it was also blocking my lucid goals.

Last night I focused on being calm, taking the slow route, and being okay with whatever happened. I had no anxiety, and I got great sleep.

When my anxiety went away my dream vividness and recall came back, which feels amazing.

Results: Color Code: RL/Comments - Non Lucid

Dream One: Beards

I was a beard counselor.

Yes that is exactly what it sounds like.

People would come into my office and I would give them advice on their facial hair

Dream Two: Football on TV?

That is all my dream notes say and I don't know what they mean?

Dream Three: War

Again I have some dream notes that I don't remember. They say:

"SOHYRJN, Fighting dishes drool. Mages, this means WAR!"

I literally have no idea what any of that means lol

Dream Four: Burn Notice

I am a spy operating in Russia. I am about to complete a mission and the police are chasing me.

After leading them on a long, cold, chase I feel sorry for them, their just doing their jobs right? So I take them out to get ice cream.

There are like a hundred of them standing in line waiting to get into the ice cream shop. I am going down the line apologizing to them and shaking their hands. They are angry, but I feel like they will get over it.

Side Note: I remember their was somebody in front of me in the ice cream shop ordering. She wanted some ice cream to help her take some pills? She sprinkled these pink pills all over her ice cream, but then started complaining.

She had ordered vanilla ice cream with chocolate syrup. But when they gave it to her she started complaining about the chocolate syrup, saying it would make her pills taste bad?

I was annoyed, why are you taking your pills with ice cream anyway!?

Dream Five: Skyrim

I am on my grandparents farm with my cousin N.L.

I find some lego weapons like what I have been looking for in Skyrim (A game). There is a Lego bow with a supper fast firing time, a crossbow, and a grappling hook.

I play with them for a long time, shooting things all around the farm.

Then I think that the Lego grappling hook may be a collectors item so I think about selling it on Ebay.

Dream Six? Almost DEILD then WILD

This morning I was woken up with somebody leaving the house. It was at the end of my last dream, and I thought I might be able to DEILD back into it. I lay still and tried to visualize the last scene to transition back into it lucid. I was so close! I could vividly see the scene and I was slipping in and out of it. It was so cool because it was like looking at a picture and trying to enter it. When I would get close it would start to move forward in slow motion, but when I would slip out it would become like a picture again... pretty cool

Then I thought I would try to WILD. There was some of the same stuff I have experienced in the past trying to WILD but then something new.

I just had a thought, maybe I should have RC'ed because I probably had entered a dream without knowing it!!!!

Here is what happened. As I was trying to WILD, and feeling pretty close, I started to see a bunch of faces flashing by. I didn't know any of the people, and they were both male and female from multiple nationalities. They where passing by my vision like a slide show. I was absolutely amazed at how creative my mind can be. How is it coming up with so many faces I have never seen before so quickly?

I wonder if it can do anything else? I thought about seeing landscapes instead of faces and instantly the slide show changes to one of scenic views. It was amazing! The landscapes lasted for like 15 slides but then I became to exited and amazed at my mind so I snapped out of it.

Looking back I am almost positive that I had probably transitioned into a dream without knowing it! I can't believe it! So cool!

Techniques Used: I went to bed with the intention of doing a DILD. I practiced my RC checks throughout the day and refreshed them before going to bed. As I was going to bed I tried to remain confident that I would have a lucid dream, and that it would be very stable and realistic. I also did a little day dreaming to try and incubate a dream in a fantasy fiction setting.

Results: My DILD technique was not successful at all. I did have a very cool dream, but I did not manage to ever become lucid or even remember to perform a RC check. Even though I was not lucid I would say that on a scale of 1-10 my dream reality was still a 6 or 7. My dream felt very real, I only score it so low because I did not have any self motivation. I was basically just a DC myself which I guess was still very enjoyable :-)

My dream kind of fades in with me traveling in one of those old looking black mobster cars. I am in the car in the front seat having been captured, they are taking me somewhere and I want to escape. I start to get the impression that there is someone in the back seat so I turn around and literally have my breath taken away! In the back seat is one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen! She was captured with me, how could I have forgotten about her?! (Side Note: I am hoping that she becomes a recurring character, I asked her what her name was but can't remember what she said!) Sitting next to her is another goon but he is just a standard DC, someone I could easily deal with. The real problem is the man driving the car. I get the impression that even though we both know that I am the stronger, he has some type of hold on me and thinks that I wouldn't dare attack him.

We arrive at an apartment building. It is late evening and very overcast with big black clouds which gives the apartment a very dark and gloomy feeling, it begins to rain very hard. I have a very depressed feeling like there is no hope, the city I am in feels kind of like Gotham City.

Suddenly my character gets a boost of courage and inspiration. "These people have no power over me!" It was not the type of courage that comes from realizing that you are dreaming and it is your dream to control. It was the type of courage that makes you feel manly and capable, like with enough effort and pure grit you can do whatever you set your mind to. I jump out of the car and yell to my fair maiden to quickly fallow me, we are getting out of here! To my surprise she does not get out of the car. She gives me a strange look and downcast her eyes. The man in the front seat smiles at me, his control over her is much stronger than I realized.

This enrages me, he appears out of the car and I furiously attack him with my fists (This is a theme in my fighting dreams, rather than trying to find a weapon I almost always attack with my fists. And I have great boxing skills :-) ) He is a great fighter but I am the better. I manage to stun him and I put him in a choke hold. I am trying to choke him out and I have every intention of killing him, he deserves it for what he has done to me, and for whatever he has done to the women. Just when I think that he should die he disappears and than reappears facing me. It is the same man, but now the situation has completely changed because I have realized who he is.

He is a recurring character in my dreams, I hate him very much. If he has a name I do not know it (Maybe next time I see him I will ask him if he has a name). More than just a person he represents an idea. He is the representation of an evil part of me. He is not "PURE EVIL" (lol, said in Sponge Bob voice for any who recognize it ... serious rabbit trail lol) Anyway, he is kind of hard to explain. He is the part of me that wants to control and manipulate people. He is godless and seeks power only for himself.

Back to the plot. I now know that I cannot kill him, not in the dream anyway. He is not something that can be killed, merely resisted. It is actually kind of weird because now I stop fighting him in the traditional since and we start to act kind of friendly to one another. Not friendly, but with a kind of mutual respect. I cannot kill him, and he has no power over me whilst I am aware of him and resisting his influence.

I ask him if I can have a minute to talk to the girl. He agrees and there is a scene transition like in a movie. We leave the apartments and enter a large library with dark wood paneling everywhere. (I guess my sub-conscience thinks that libraries are good places for serious conversation). I enter the library through the front doors but she is not with me. I know that she is on the second floor somewhere, so i go looking for her. I spend five minutes chasing after her only seeing glimpses of her around corners. I then realize that she is intentionally avoiding me. Not because she is rejecting me, which would have made me very depressed, but because she knows that she can not give me what I want. (Not that you perverts! She knows that she can't come with me)

Scene Change. I leave the library and hulk jump to a train station, which is where His main base is. He wants to talk with me here because his influence is stronger in this place. I meet him on top of a wall overlooking his base. The train station is behind me and I take a moment to look at it, it looks really cool and has amazing vividness! It looks like the train station from the Harry Potter movies.

I am talking with him on top of the wall and he is starting to piss me off again. He is trying to convince me to join him. Especially since if I did I could be with her. Even though it is very tempting to me to get to be with her, I continue to resist his influence.

I notice a wall of strange objects stored on wooden shelves, like what you would store your sack lunches in during elementary school. Each cubby has a toy in it, most of them are action figures. I get very excited because these are ter'angreal! (Magic objects from the Wheel of Time series, my favorite Fantasy Fiction series). Each one is a magical object that gives the holder a powerful ability. A begin picking each one up and get very excited because I can tell what each one does! I find one that gives you the ability to heat up metal to such a degree that whatever it touches will be instantly obliterated. I take the ter'angreal and pick up a metal folding chair that is conveniently next to me. It heats up and begins to glow a cherry red. I plan to try and use it to destroy him once and for all. I think to try and touch it to see if it is really hot enough to kill him... it is very hot and burns my hand. For some reason this doesn't seem right, I should be stronger than the effects of the ter'angreal, right? I touch it again, and it HURTS! (I don't know if this is a debate anywhere on these forums. But I would like to say that you CAN feel pain in dreams! My dream realism at this point was very strong and I can still feel the burning pain that it caused.) I figure that it is hot enough to at least hurt him if not kill him. I run at him yelling Braveheart style... and I wake up.

If you managed to actually read that huge wall of text thank you! After taking so long to read it please take a moment to comment and leave your thoughts!

Analysis: Next time that He appears in my dream I am going to try and remember to ask his name. He is a recurring character and it would be helpful to know his name. I am also hoping that the girl becomes a recurring character, she was BEAUTIFUL! I am also thinking of making fist fights one of my dream signs. I never get into fist fights in real life, and it is my preferred fighting style in dreams, so it should help me become lucid if I can remember that if I am in a fist fight, I must be dreaming.

Even though I did not manage to become lucid, my dream reality and vividness was fantastic! I am really very encouraged.