Thread: Rant and Rave, Cry and Complain

My Mom's going through a crisis right now because I said my sister has had wine before. We were talking about restaurants and wine came up, and asdf. She spent the last 10 minutes crying... because she found out that most women in this country like a glass of liquefied grapes every once in a while. Honestly, how fucking far behind the times do you have to be get a reaction like that?

Mom: "Why didn't you tell me earlier?! D;"

Me: "Because it's not a big deal, [insert names of several females cousins here] have had alcohol on special occasions before too"

Mom: "WHAT?! D;"

Me: "Seriously, it doesn't really matter. [insert names of aunts here] have had wine in the past as well and they're fine... "

Mom: "... *breaks into a fit of hysterics*"

And now she'll probably be bitchy for the rest of the week and start fights for no fucking reason whatsoever. This is such a trivial little thing, but it's like her entire world has collapsed. >_________>

EDIT: And now my my Dad's home, I'm probably going to have to spend the next few hours trying to end a fight that my mom will no doubt spark. Honestly, what the hell? All this shit, over wine?! Normal families make me so jelly.

lol, Tommo. If only we could lash out like that
I LOVED my mouse dream. It's been a very long time since I dreamed I was an animal.

LightOfHeaven. Here's back at ya

Hope you enjoyed your meal, Suena

My rant is that I am sore all over. During the graduation, when everyone was all emotional (for practically an entire hour!) I caught myself tensing up so fiercely I was actually trembling. I kept telling myself to chill and relax, that everything was all good, but I just couldn't. I didn't even touch my daughter once during the outpouring. Instead, I stabbed myself with my stubby fingernails Why is it so friggin impossible for me to handle other peoples emotions?
So, now my jaw is clicking (TMJ) and my chest is tight again I also have a good old fashion tension headache.
BUT, the sign was off my p-docs door this evening. I drove by his office after going to the store. Maybe he'll be open tomorrow AND able to see me? One can hope...

Rant: Why is power so damn sexy?

Originally Posted by LightofHeaven

I'm not depressed. I have a relaxed attitude towards life and I don't experience much sadness or tension at all; it's just that I feel nothing. I have plenty of friends and loved ones to spend my time with and despite all this, I know so little about humans in general. I frequently observe the way people interact with each other and often puzzled by it. Before I go further, I would just like to clarify that I am not entirely emotionless. It is something I'm known for, as far as my family, peer groups and psychiatrist are concerned but very few of them realize that I do experience joy, love and sadness just like everyone else. I really treasure those rare moments in life of pure bliss such as my sister calling to check up on me during the storm, having a juicy steak, playing with my cat and of course having a nice lucid dream (well lucids come by pretty easily but epic ones are epic).

Ah, I understand. I can be kind of that way too, but maybe for different reasons. Sometimes I just feel totally removed from everything and everyone, like I can really take a look at the things we as a species do and think about how ridiculous it all is. The universe is a crazy place.

Originally Posted by LightofHeaven

I'm gradually learning to identify and express what I feel more. It helps to have these people on DV listen to our problems. Honestly, I've learned so much from everyone here and since April 2011 when I joined DV till now has really been an eye-opener for me. It's an interesting medium of expression because it doesn't matter that I don't know any of you personally, I am able to freely talk about my life and I can always count on getting some insightful and meaningful responses. It really is like having a second family. Family hug?

I completely agree. I love it here, it's a wonderful place.

I set a timer for 8:20 PM, which was one hour from 7:20 PM. I decided that I could fit ONE hour of hardcore devotion towards tulpaforging.

I don't know HOW long I spent sitting there in the darkness, opening my eyes, spazzing out on purpose, having my mind so clear and so empty, but my brain start start tingling and hurting.

Never, actually, rarely, in all my life, my brain ever hurts THAT much. I could've been hungry at the time, but never had I had my brain hurt this much in a short span of time. Like.....only if I take a math exam after 1 hour of another exam from a hardcore subject like Organic Chemistry would I experience bwain damage.

It's barely an hour, my breathing is calm, slow, mind clear, and it HURTS me? I even starting getting masochistic, opening my eyes, dilating, or just disorienting them a bit, starting to see pulsating sensations coming from the corners of my eyes, starting to see a black ball forming in the air.

OMG OMG OMG, TULPA!! But nooo, the moment just....disappears. My bwain hurts, so I decided to rest at a 60 degree angle instead of a 90 degree angle. Who ever knew creating a construct of your mind into this reality would be so brain powah intensive?

I read few posts from the tulpa site mentioning that being a typical thing, so I guess I'm making progress, because I did not try hard at all. I had the clearest mind for maybe 20 minutes, I was relaxed, and I had bwain hurt.

This is crazy, but it's so fun because I started feeling that I had some visualizations in. I should've focused on getting her to be vocal, but not...quiet, nothing. She's saying nothing. I'm not stressed about it, it's just that before...things came so quickly, I swore I wasn't parroting, or simulating a conversation.

But when I take the initiative to give 1 hour of intense tulpaforging that I will be incorporating daily for 1 hour to give myself a break from studying......I now slept for 4 extra hours, so that's 5 extra hours when I decided to sleep, or when she decided to close my eye lids. I didn't want to sleep, but I got this strong urge to do so.

It's not that darkness that made me sleepy, probably just the huge bwain hurt I had, but still...5 hours of sleep from 7:20 PM to around 12:20 AM...

What the fuck am I supposed to do? I screwed up my opportunity to trial run to potentially induce a AP/OBE.....and time that I could've used to read on Halides. I just needed 10 fucking minutes to know how to name them, and I slept for 4 hours, because my bwain hurts.

God fucking bullshit! I don't sleep because of that shit! I never needed to sleep, I fucking went trooper mode and finished anything, I don't care how hard it is. How is tulpaforging suddenly the limit I need to surpass?

Oh right, creating someone into your reality, thus knowing from individual experience, that this reality I'm in isn't so predictable as it seems.

Well, since it makes my bwain hurt, I might as well do it more, it's exercise for it at least.....and I feel st00pidEr anyway.

Give up on the potential for an aspect of my mind to readily give me information, thus reducing stress and increasing efficiency on what I need to know at a faster pace? NO WAY, I'm not giving up on that oppurtunity, no bloody way!

NO WAY....but 4 hours man...4 HOURS....THAT'S A LOT OF HOURS....


Ugh. Just...whatever. Time has been so important to me lately, every moment counts, I'm trying to be that person that's in the moment rather than the future.

*cries* 4 hours mans...no 5 hours....I could try to WILD, but it just feels so wrong.

Good night, Dream Views. Sorry, if I didn't vent, I'd probably punch a wall, and have to lie to maintenance for the first time ever....and that wouldn't have been good now would it?

I also noticed that when I do have those rare moments of being pissed, the results can go in any direction. That's concerning, that's really concerning.

Another realization, because of that, it's no surprise that's the case, because I purposefully act like some weak-ass otaku, because it just feels so pointless being angry at people, a concept, or just anything at all.

Wow. Okay, going to sleep now, tulpaforging is official, from this day on, until I find something more intensive, is the most challenging thing I'll be doing. If I can climb over that wall of difficulty...who knows....remote viewing, possession...or even better, unconscious reflexes circulating at a rapid rate (excluding ones that might be negative)...it's crazy, I'm insane, but I LOVE it.

Fuck being normal. Tulpa all the way!

But really, I know I'm stupid and incompetent, but never had my bwain hurt this much. BLeh. Get over it link.

Gavin, is your mum religious or something? How come she is shocked that her own sisters have had wine before?

Originally Posted by Patrick

Gavin, is your mum religious or something? How come she is shocked that her own sisters have had wine before?

Indians are notoriously conservative. D:

She shook it off soon after I posted that, hopefully she doesn't flip in the morning.

I have a serious inability to stick to schedules....

Well, congrats to anyone who voted today (I'm assuming most people on this forum would vote for Obama) and thanks for helping keep the world from another war or two.

Barack sends his gratitude, Tommo

There's not even one http:// or image extension link in that post of yours yuppie. It's like a cluster of letters and numbers lol. inb4edit

EDIT: There we go

My son is going to go Postal soon. Probation is in the house. The man is in the restroom with my son trying to get him to pee, but my son has a shy bladder.
It's bad enough that our house is filthy. The bathroom is one of the worst places with the bunny living there, having free reign. So he's self-conscious about that to begin with.
And he doesn't care for the male probo worker. Something about him gets on my sons nerves.

Now he's on the verge of crying. Ugh...

I just woke up. I despise people being in my house. It's filthy. I know it's filthy. Save your judgement because I don't want to hear it.
ANd my p-doc can't see me until I get back. Grrrrr....
It's too early for this BS. Probo is still here. I need to get my laundry and hung outside. I forgot to roll down all the windows after the ozonator. I need to do that ASAP. My son needs to just friggin pee.

**EDIT**
My son elicited a clap from Probo. He FINALLY peed rofl

***EDIT again***
lol, it's a slow day here
My car is airing out, I have the first of 2 loads hanging up outside and the other washing.
But it's going to rain soon Seriously weather? I was told to expect temps in the high 40's but it's only 41 (feels like 38 with the wind chill).
I look at intellicast right now, and it tells me it's sunny outside. WTF lol.

Another rant is that my right ear is driving me batty. For the last couple of days it's been (completely randomly) turning bright red and feeling hot. I always connected such to a spike in blood pressure, but my BP is fine. I've not eaten or drank anything out of the ordinary. What the heck?
Ugh.. and my poor lower gums are killing me because I've been grinding my teeth in my sleep. Last night I had stress dreams. In the last one, I was trying to get my hubby's attention but he couldn't see me even though I stood right beside him. I then wondered if I was dead and he told me I wasn't. Before that, I dreamed something about children and war. And water. Can't forget the water. But I've forgotten the story.

Also, is it possible to lose inches without losing weight (with no exercise)? My clothes are falling off of me but the scale still reads 145.

Freeze -> blue screen -> reboot -> hard disk not found -> reboot -> completely black screen -> windows finally loads!! -> freeze -> crash-> repeat

I have an actual rant for once. I voted for my first time this year, for the presidential election. I voted for Obama and he won, and I'm happy about that. I very likely wouldn't have taken the time to do it myself, but I got pushed into it. Don't get me wrong, I do care about how the country is run (to an extent, I'm still young), but I live in a guaranteed red state and I personally don't believe that it would be the end of the world if either candidate won. Certainly not what people make it out to be, if it didn't work we would just try again in another four years. Maybe I feel that way because I've still got a long life ahead of me, but that's how I see it. However, I voted for Obama not really because of anything political, but because I dislike Romney as a person. There was nothing else I could do because I know nothing about the issues at hand.

This takes me to my main point. Like I said, I wouldn't have voted on my own. I personally believe that the only people who should vote are the people who have actually invested interest in politics and taken the time to form educated views, which I have not. I barely knew anything about how voting works when my parents brought me to the booth and I went in there thinking that if I had to choose one guy and I didn't know much about either politically I might as well go with the guy who I don't hate on a social level. When I got in there what I saw was tons and tons of candidates for all kinds of political seats, which I wasn't expecting. I didn't know any of them and I voted straight ticket because my mom told me that was the easiest way to get it over with. It's only been a week or so since then and I already can't stand the fact that I did this.

When you vote you're not voting for a party, you're voting for a person. Every single person is different, and that includes politicians. Very, very few people are completely right or left in their political views. Most Democrats that you talk to, at least if they're educated enough on everything, will say "well, there are at least these one or two stereotypically Republican views I can agree with", and vice-versa. Politics is a large and varied field and there are lots of things to have different opinions on, everyone will have a different outlook. Furthermore, just because you may agree with one view on a federal level doesn't necessarily mean you think it would work just as well on a state level. We're dealing with two different things here. Even the issues that different politicians deal with will not be the same, the reason there are different positions to win is because they're there for different reasons. It could very well be that, if say you want the Democrat candidate to win the presidency, you would still want a Republican candidate to win some office closer to home. And that doesn't mean that you're being hypocritical or going against your team or anything ridiculous like that, it just means that you gave both of those people a shot and decided that you would like them each to win their respective elections. It does not mean anything other than that you trust that those are smart and good people, because things like Democrat and Republican are just labels to generalize. They are simply there to tell you "this person leans right" or "this person leans left", they do not define that person as a whole and they could very well be for something you want that, based on those labels, you would naturally assume they were against.

Keep in mind that I don't have specific issues in mind when I say these things, I'm just using common sense. So here I am, completely uneducated on any of these matters while so many people who I'd never even heard of got my vote. Listen to me: coattails are a bad thing, people. We can elect some real assholes into office this way just because they're getting a free ride along with the president, and I for one am already ashamed to have participated in this. The next time I vote I'm going to do my research for everyone on the ballot before I go in, I'm going to know who I want to win, and I'm going to vote for them. I'm not going to vote straight ticket unless I come to an educated decision that that is the best route. If I think that it's right, I will vote for both Democrats and Republicans because there is nothing wrong with that. Also, if anyone ever pushes me into voting again without doing that prior research, I will tell them to fuck off.

I think that's about all I had to say. You may resume browsing now.

I had to feel sorry for Romney during his losing speech. He looks so sad, almost like he was about to cry.

I still know almost nothing about politics, not enough to make any judgment about which candidate I think should win. Still, biases cloud my mind and at least I'm aware of this. I wanted Obama to win because people I know, trust and respect want him to win. He's just the obvious choice for people around here, people on DV, youtubers and podcasters, and almost everyone else whose intelligence I respect. I haven't heard much good about Obama from anyone, but the impression I've gotten from short clips, etc. is that Romney is pretty much an idiot. And yeah it's a bias, for all I know republicans might be the better choice (if forced to chose between the two).

I've been talking to some republicans lately though who seemed to make valid points, who pretty much treated Obama as I've heard others treat Romney. The problems they stated with Obama which Romney wouldn't cause made sense... unless they just had the facts wrong. I realized that my bias was so strong toward Obama I found myself (not showing it but) actually getting upset about what they were saying. I felt they must be getting their facts wrong and was annoyed at the fact that, because I don't know the facts myself, had no way of rebutting. I pretty much just had to say 'oh' and continue to repeat that I don't have a side, even though I know the bias is there and they know it too. I honestly just don't know how to look up politics. The whole thing seems so complicated I don't know how anyone forms opinions they can be sure about anyway. Unless they're really as ignorant as I am but pretend they aren't or something.

Try not to worry too much...politics takes a little learning.

For future elections you can visit the website of your local paper or a county site which contains info on all the local and state issues for your polling area. It will list all the things you will be able to vote on with a brief listing of information, enough to make a decision on for most items.

Someday you may own property or have children and these little issues may mean more to you and your life...or your pocketbook. Voting straight ticket is fine but sometimes it's nice to pick people based on your own personal feelings about who is the best-qualified person.

@Dianeva...it gets easier with time. Watching the news regularly is a good start but will still provide incomplete coverage of the candidates.

Every candidate has faults or shortcomings and I can't imagine the job of president will ever be easy. Sometimes it's a matter of choosing the best man to lead a country forward and not the one who keeps things stagnant or moves it backwards.

I wish we would get rid of this party thing and just vote for a person.

Originally Posted by melanieb

Try not to worry too much...politics takes a little learning.

For future elections you can visit the website of your local paper or a county site which contains info on all the local and state issues for your polling area. It will list all the things you will be able to vote on with a brief listing of information, enough to make a decision on for most items.

Someday you may own property or have children and these little issues may mean more to you and your life...or your pocketbook. Voting straight ticket is fine but sometimes it's nice to pick people based on your own personal feelings about who is the best-qualified person.

Thanks for that, that'll be helpful to know!

That's mainly what concerns me, I'm trying to think more about my future now. There's a lot of that I need to catch up on.

I don't think there's anything wrong with voting straight ticket if you actually do believe in all of those candidates, I just don't want to do it because it's the easy way again. I also don't want to limit myself to either Democrat or Republican, putting labels on myself seems more hurtful than anything. Keeping an open mind is a definitely a good thing.

Originally Posted by Taffy

I wish we would get rid of this party thing and just vote for a person.

Parties aren't so bad for helping with judgments, but they shouldn't be treated as they are now. This whole "us vs them" mentality is starting to get kind of overboard too if you ask me, we really need to start working together again. America was founded on compromise.

Of course, I'm not super educated on this stuff either, just my observations. >.>

Ahhhhh, my browser crashed. Normally that wouldn't be that big of a deal, but it glitched when it reopened and I had to end the process and open it again, and then every single tab I had open was just gone. GONE. So many lost tabs....

I officially loathe any FUCKING professor I see spew shit like, "You can't memorize this, it'll be too difficult."

No, stop fucking UNDERMINING me you bitch! I don't care if you're implying students are going to take a course that goes with this one, FUCK YOU. That same condescending shit, it's a distraction that would've made me get a better grade. Not that I'm blaming the professor, I'm blaming my own dipshit self for falling for that undermining shit any professor states.

If it works, if you can organize how you memorize it, and you can pass, same result, less effort. Yes, there's those who fuck up memorization, and end up having to catch up, but it doesn't mean you can't try....you have to risk some shit you know...no more of this understanding concept shit. Rote fucking memory all the way. Fuck this shit, I would've gotten a better grade if I wasn't such a piece of shit and fell for her condescending tactics.

Sure, retrospect is going to help me realize that I made a mistake and can move on, but to waste an EASY opportunity to add insurance to my grade, when I know I'm actually capable of doing it.....that just pisses me off SO much. I'm going to refute every fucking shit any professor says. That's what I did before, and I did exceptionally well now. There's no difference between college and high school to me now, not any more....they're just using that it's different to scare people.

Fuck, if I'm going to be in debt like the rest of hundreds of thousands of misguided people finding a career to go to, I might as well do what I do best, and just do well, and fuck all logic from what professors said. Just...the concept of "you can't do this, you can't do that" just needs to DIE DIE DIE.

Ugh. I'm breezing through my Organic Chemistry homework for once. You know why? BECAUSE I'm FUCKING LINKZELDA BITCH, don't tell me these are complex mechanisms....if people did it before, I sure as hell can do it too. Tired of this "impossible, you have to do this" shit they're giving me.

SN1 / SN2 nucleophilic substitution?

Dave

Remnants of my years as one of Jehovah's Witnesses leaves me almost completely apathetic when it comes to politics. The Bible says that Satan is the "ruler of this system of things" and Jesus said his Kingdom wasn't on Earth. So, Witnesses don't take part in politics in any way.
BUT, having said all of that, I'm still glad Romney didn't win. I was/am completely uninformed about his political beliefs and practices (as is the case with anyone in or running for office), but I was extremely uncomfortable with him being a devout and practicing Mormon.
I don't know why it bothered me though. I studied with the Mormons before the Witnesses, and generally speaking, they're a great bunch of people. They're peaceful, practical and they plan for future problems (stockpiling food and such).
I would be happier not knowing the religious beliefs of anyone running for presidency. But at the same time, I wouldn't be happy with a hard-core atheist either.

I think I worry that the devout could run the problem of pushing their own religious agenda.

I can't believe it's not even 9PM yet. WTH? I even took a 2 hour nap earlier.
It was too moist outside so my clothes never dried and I had to use hubby's dryer. Now, he's going to get it in his head that I contaminated his dryer I fear I'm going to have to put up with some psychosis during a good deal of the initial trip. Then again, he may get some rest and be completely normal.
Ugh... the drive will take 8-10 hours and hubby still doesn't know when we're going to leave. "Some time tomorrow" is all I can get out of him. I'd like to know more so I can try to get some sleep right before we head out.

Another rant is that I've had a scratch near my right shoulder for over a week now. I told my son I needed some antibiotic cream because it was getting infected. He saw it, shrugged and said it looked okay to him. I told him it had a wide red band around it which indicates infection.
But I took his reaction and downplayed my own. It's still there though healing. It's an inch long and is itching the heck out of me. I know that's a good sign, but it's still irritating. It still has a small red band around it and it's a little warm to the touch. And I STILL have no antibiotic cream

Originally Posted by LightofHeaven

SN1 / SN2 nucleophilic substitution?

HA, I eat that for BREAKFAST

• Alkyl Halide Nomenclature
  
  Drawing Intermediates in Radical Halogenation
  
  Radical Chlorination: Relative Reactivity of Hydrogen: Number of Constitutional Isomers Formed
  
  Radical Chlorination: Number of Constitutional Isomers and Stereoisomers Formed
  
  Resonance in Allylic Radicals
  
  Drawings Resonance Forms of Allylic Radicals
  
  Preparation of Alkyl Halides from Alcohols
  
  Organomagneisum, -lithium and -copper Reagents
  
  Gilman Reagant Coupling with Organic Halides
  
  Oxidation and Reduction in Organic Reactions

This is the easier stuff. All it is: This thingamagiger goes here, this fucker kills this mofo, replaces that, this has that, blah blah.

On the 9th section so far, total amount of time devoted 90 minutes.

Not even reading the book, getting 100% on all sections so far. Screw the book.

Dave the Joker has now informed me that he is too poor to play the twenty dollar wager he wanted to have with me regarding the election. Each time it has been brought up, a mod or someone deletes the thread. Word to the wise -- don't gamble if you can't pay the FUCK up.

I actually studied most of that in high school.

This was the question that got me in my finals (sorry about the quality):