insideout

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

May 22, '11: I am in the side yard/woods of my parents' house. I see two or three large crane-like birds that are blue. I call them "harper birds." All but one flies away.
I sneak through the woods, back to the house. I have to be careful because I know there is a large dangerous animal that wants to catch me.

There is a very big lion/tiger statue made of scrap metal. It comes to life and runs after me.
I am ready for it, and I shoot it with imaginary arrows, in the face and many times in the body until it falls and stays down.
I believe the animal had been hunting me in a previous dream.
It changes so that its head looks like a cardboard skull of a large wild cat. I hit it and ask it a question like "What is the enemy of my enemy?" It doesn't answer so I ask it again more sternly.

It answers by saying "Will you learn to trust (follow?) the wind?"
The animal thing turns into a dying person (genderless?) I am somewhat lucid. I kneel down, holding the person in my arms. I say "I have to go home (wake up)."
It says "I'm going home too," and it implies that we are going to the same place, or will eventually.
I say "Will we meet again?"
It says no, but seems uncertain.
I say "goodbye" as I wake up.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

May 22, 2011: A woman and a young guy (18 or 19) are in a car with 17th or 18th century style chairs, and no roof. The woman gets out and goes to the door of a large building.
They are both like characters from the Matrix, in attitude and appearance. They are wearing long coats.
The Boy thinks he knows everything, but is wrong. He thinks a man loves the woman, but the person is actually a woman. The boy has chocolate on his mouth as he talks in a serious tone.

A corner of the building, near the door, looks like the walls are made of human skin and painted over. The woman lifts the thin walls, they were just lightly glued together. She says the wall is full of guns, or weapons.
Inside, there is a secret room, where experiments or some secret activities are done.

Now I am part of the action, not just observing. I hear someone say there is a new species.
Suddenly, an alien monster appears, although I don't see it. I run and jump on top of a wall. The creature sees me and runs very fast towards me. I shoot at it but the bullets are useless. It jumps at.

I yell out "Stop! Pause!" and the creature stops in mid-air. I have no idea what to do. I say "I guess I just... get killed." Then the creature gets me and i wake up.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

May 20, '11: I am in a parking lot. Someone is trying to use ESP or telekinesis. I star floating around and say that I am using telekinesis to find my car.
I become lucid and fly away. I find the refrigerator, sort of in the kitchen, but also outside. I decide to look at the back of the fridge to compare with waking reality
The back looks the same as the front.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

May 17, 2011: I am riding a bicycle up the driveway towards the house. I sort of push the bike up the hill, and also sort of riding at the same time, beside the bike.
A large truck drives by and almost hits me. I turn around and throw the bike at the truck. I become lucid, I'm not sure if before or after throwing the bike.

Aware that I'm dreaming, I remember my goal to summon my dream guide. I see my car and decide to have her appear inside it.
I made up some magic chant/song as I stand beside the car. I have a blanket that I am also trying to get rid of, but it is tangled around me.
I open the car door, and there is no one in there. I go around to the other side, state my intention and open the door. Still nothing.

Then I call up to the sky, asking why she won't appear for me. I get no response.
I feel the dream fading but I stop myself from waking by rubbing my hands together. Then I go inside the house. I see a mirror and flip onto my back.

There is no one around. I wish I could be somewhere interesting. Then I eat some food and wake up a bit.

In the kitchen, Dad asks me where a car part is. He says it is called a "boot"-something, because it is shaped like a boot. I tell him I know what part he is talking about, but I haven't seen it recently. I tell him it has probably been moved around with the storage.

I realize I am dreaming again and I think the conversation with Dad probably didn't happen.
I am still in the kitchen. Thirsty, I pick up a glass of raspberry ginger ale and have a drink. It tastes good and refreshing.

There is a man sitting at a computer in a room, listening to a tape recording of some other man talking. I ask him what he is listening to. I can't understand it. I think I know who he is, but when he turns around he has a really big nose.
He pulls out a blue plastic gun to shoot me. I'm like "Ok, fine," and I leave.
In the next room, there are three women studying some kind of science. On of them seems familiar, but I'm not sure if from TV or someone I knew.
She has a big fake horse in her room. I know it is fake, but I ask if it is real anyway. She says no. I tell her she probably can't keep a real horse in here, joking. Then I wake up.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

May 5, '11, Fragment 1: Someone tells me a word that sounds like Chaklasharoo, or Shakrashlaroo, and tells me it is the name of the world.
I look it up and it is a word in another language that means "One pig, one spider."

Fragment 2: I lie on the ground. I realize there is a cow lying beside me. She is nice and we are friends.
The cow gets up and pretends to be a mean big cat. I tell her to be nice.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

May 3, 2011: I am lucid in the dream, in a hallway. I want to see my dream guide. There are paintings on the wall. I pick one up and ask if it is my dream guide.
A girl appears. She won't talk when I ask her questions. I tell her she is pretty. Then I tell her to say "aardvark." She doesn't.
I am carrying her around. She shrinks and changes form into a thing with creepy skinny limbs that hook onto my face. I throw the thing to the ground.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

May 2, 2011: There is a birthday party, for a children, a young girl, I think. Another girl comments that she is a bad host.
There is a girl in a sleeping bag on the floor. She is concerned because someone had predicted something bad would happen to her.
I am like her mother. I give her a personal symbol of strength to protect her. It's a small sea shell. I ask her to remember the time she had fun on the beach.
I see a mirror. The reflection is not my own. I become lucid. I talk to the reflection and say this is a dream. "But it is also real (experience). Is it less real or more real?" I decide that the words probably do not apply, because the dream is something other than "real" or "not real." It is both.

I don't think of all that while in the dream, but it describes how I feel.

I touch a plant while I am musing on the realness of the dream. It is a large succulentus plant. I go through a window and the dream fades.

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I am camping with my girlfriend. I am naked, in a car or truck with no top. I cover us with a blanket over the car. I want to have sex with her, but a woman shows up and asks her a question. Something about what another lady had said earlier.
They go away to talk.
I put on shorts and then a shirt. Thee are other guys watching me. I pretend to fall asleep. A dog approaches me. Then several dogs appear and start attacking me. I fight back and kill some of them. I feel like I am not in control, and I don't want to be violent.
I end up inside the house (my parents').
The window on the kitchen door is broken and glass is on the ground. I become partially lucid as I step outside.

I try to fly, and sort of do. Then I am in town, walking down a road. I burp loudly and pretend to be a dinosaur or monster. I knock over a car that looks kind of like a golf cart.
A small woman doll is screaming. The doll is round and it's mouth opens like a dummy.
I am at a hospital, or something like one, in a room that looks like a play area for kids. There is a plastic container full of dolls. These dolls have wire springs for arms and legs.

---------------

I am lucid and outside my parents' house. I jump into the pond and swim. A big fish starts swimming at me.
It gets bigger and I hold onto its side. It waves its tail to swim quickly and goes out of the water, onto land.
It is like an inflatable fish. I climb onto its back and ride it on land. It sort of has legs like a horse. We ride through tree branches. One branch punctures the fish and it begins to deflate.
Then I am no longer lucid. There is a folding ladder with bottles of glue on it.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

April 30, '11: I am in a bathroom that has a large glass wall. The curtain is also see-through. I realize that people can see in with the light on.
I go outside and down some steps. There are lots of dangerous people around. They are all escaped convicts.
I have a violent fight with a few of them, during which I become partially lucid.
I jab my hand through a guy's chest and/or head.

Then, more fully conscious, I stop fighting and tell everyone that because this is my dream, I want to be in charge. I tell them that I want to have fun, exciting dreams, with some erotic things, but not too much.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

April 25, '11: I go outside and find my car door open. I see another car with its doors open. Laura is there, taking the car, pushing it. She tells me she is doing it for exercise. She and her boyfriend/husband get in the car and drive away.
I start to fly and follow them. I make a magic link to the car so I can follow it easily.
I become partially lucid. As I fly, I see a meteor shower. The meteors crash into the ground, causing explosions Two of them hit me, and it stings.
I am flying on a chair and holding a pillow.
I see a lady riding an ostrich and other people running or riding things. They are in a hurry to get to work. I figure that must be where Laura is too.

I ride the ostrich with the lady. We stop and everyone stands in a group, facing their boss woman.
The boss lady fires and old man and makes him pay $600 or more. I shout, with my hands cupped around my mouth, "That's bullshit!"

I tell her that it is not fair to make him pay her for working and being fired. I tell them that in my world there are regulations controlled by the government, to protect people. They don't seem to like this.
As I talk, I pick up a packet of mayonnaise, bite it, and suck on it. I say "gross" and throw it down. Someone tells me I am not a very good speaker, or leader, or something like that. Everyone leaves.

An old man who looks kind of like Fred Phelps (of the Westboro Baptist Church) approaches. He is angry and has a knife (a bread knife).
I grab the knife and stab him with it. It is like he is made of wood. Then I run away with the knife and throw it over what looks like the edge of the world.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

April 23, '11: I am running down a sidewalk. I run through a fence opening, past an old man. The old man is angry at people running past his house.
I start running backwards to face the old man. I tell him I’m sorry, but it’s the only way I know how to get where I’m going. He is not angry anymore, and we hug.
I continue running, now very tired. I wonder where I was going. I can’t remember. I realize I must be dreaming, so I relax and start floating.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

April 22, '11: I am in the kitchen of my childhood home. Mom asks me why i got baptised (when I was 12). I tell her at the time I thought it was something I needed to do.
Mom talks and becomes very angry. she says I get to do whatever I want. I say that everyone has limitations, but she doesn't listen. She comes toward me and Dad intervenes, getting between us.

I say "She's fucking crazy!" Dad is angry that I said "fucking," and says she can't help it.
I wake up and smash my clock.

After another nonlucid dream, I WILD and enter a dream consciously.

Still lying in bed, I'm not sure if I am awake or dreaming. I sit up and pinch my nose and breath through it.
I am in a place like a hotel, possibly with a pool and bar. I walk around and call out for mom. I see a woman from behind that I think is her.
I confront her and tell her to leave me alone.
Then I see another woman from behind that looks more like her than the last one. I confront her and I thank her for raising me the best she knew how. I hug her and then find dad sitting at a bar. I thank him, too, for raising me the best he knew how.
Then the dream fades.

I enter another lucid dream. I am at the bar again, sitting with dad, playing with straw wrapper. I tell him that I want to do things in the dream world that I haven't done before, like gambling.
I am in a casino. I sit at a card table with other men and start throwing cards around. I pick up a tiny card and eat it. I give up and leave because I don't know what I'm doing.

I go to a pool table to play. Me and another guy clear the table of the boxes of soda cans that are on top of it. I note how light they are. I want to play pool to see what the physics of the will be like.
I start to set up the table but it takes too long, so I just get a stick and try hitting balls.
It is difficult. A ball floats above the table, they don't move right and there is a gutter hole all along the edge of the pool table, so the balls just fall in, rather than bounce off the edge.

I say "These physics suck!" I quit and tell the other guy that he wins.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

April 20, 2011: I am swinging from ropes/strings, kind of like window blind strings, on the side of a building. I come to a really tall tree, with a room inside the top of it. Someone is inside the room. At the base of the tree, which is against a wall, I try to put up a long ladder made of big, bendy tree branches.

But the ladder is wobbly and falls over. I look up and a large branch falls toward me, kind of slowly. I kick the falling branch out of the way.
A truck or van drives by with "TNT" written on the side, in big letters. Two yellow vans also drive by. I think they are cops undercover, and that they are going to come after me.
I fly into the air and two men and a lion chase after me on the ground. I realize I'm dreaming. I tell them to go away and then I ignore them.
I fly between two rows of trees, hitting some leaves as I go. I say "I'm the lucidest motherfucker on the road!" as I attempt to stabilize.

Then I bang into a tree and it shakes. I state aloud that when I hit the tree, a castle will come up from the ground, and I gesture to a field on my right where I want the castle.
I hit the tree again and turn around to give the castle a chance to appear behind me. But I see a large castle in the other direction.
I fly toward it, and say that it is a cool castle.
Since the castle appeared like I wanted, I thought I could get Sheila to appear too. I see a fountain with a decorative stone thing in the middle of it. I state aloud that when I press the stone, Sheila will appear on the ground below. I push in the statue thing and I wake up.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

April 19, 2011: I am in my old bedroom. I have a chair that is also a fish tank, full of water and some soil and plants. I see triops swimming around in the water. I am surprised and happy to see them still alive.

Then I become suspicious and suspect that I could be dreaming, because this sort of thing happens in dreams, and I usually wake up disappointed. I nose pinch but can't tell if I am dreaming or awake.
Eddie is in my room, looking for something. I ask him if this is a dream. He babbles about something I don't understand.

I conclude that I must because of the situation. Then I remember that I want to meditate in a dream. I sit on the floor, in meditation position and shut my eyes.
I feel like I am floating, and then I wake up.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

April 17, 2011: I consciously enter a dream. I get up out of bed. Everything is dark, grainy and black and white. Things clear up a bit and I find my girlfriend lying in a bed. Then the dream fades and I begin to wake up.

I get up. I'm not sure if I am awake or not, so I pinch my nose. I can still breath through it, so I know I am in a dream.
I comment on how bright, colorful, and realistic this dream is, unlike the previous one. I call out my intention to face my nightmares and fears and confront them.
I see a creepy hooded guy upstairs. I approach him and I demand that the nightmares stop being a nuisance. Lots of other people and things appear. I tell all of them to leave me alone and that I want to explore and grow, and learn without them hindering me, or being in the way.

I tell this to a mirror and to a dark place. I tell them all to go away!
There is something like a flash, everyone vanishes, and I wake up.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

April 12, 2011: I was in the storage building next to my old house, concentrating on the sensation of walking while looking at my feet and stomping. I think I was wearing tennis shoes that I haven't worn in years.
I saw a man and asked him for help. I asked him where I could find flowers for a bouquet (remembering the basic task of the month). I went through a door that led to another room. I saw another door and said that would would lead outside. I let two guys go out first.

I went out and saw a bunch of flowers and other plants. I picked some from a flowerbed. First I picked a red and a yellow succulentus-type plant. I thought they were not really flowers, so I kept looking.
There were flowers planet in hanging baskets. I picked a blue fuzzy, puff one, and a red one with yellow on the tips of the petals that looked like a tulip. I smelled it and it smelled like a real flower.

I picked a purple flower and grabbed some weird shaped vegetables, one looked like a squash. I thought this was funny to put in the bouquet. I was just grabbing everything in sight.
I held the flowers in a bunch with both hands. I walked further out and saw more flowers, little purple or blue ones. But I didn't get to pick any of them because I woke up.

I quickly doodled the flowers before I forgot what they looked like.
Here is a re-drawing I did later: