insideout

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

April 4, 2011: WILDed again.
I was lucid in a dream and found my girlfriend. I asked her to tell me whenever I am dreaming. I'm not sure how she responded.
She laid on the floor in the small hallway of our house. I grabbed a bunch of food from the fridge and put them on the floor with her. She vanished and I heard Eddie in the bathroom. I was naked. I picked up all the food and took it to my room. I held a soda can in one hand, it felt cold.
I put the food on my desk and started eating it. Maybe I wasn't fully lucid for this part.

I tried to make my girlfriend appear on the bed, with no success. I held my arm and hand up like a puppet and pretended it was her.
Then I began to wake from the dream, but I entered another lucid dream again. I was outside, climbed a tree and saw a small kid standing on a car.

I called out for my girlfriend again and heard her in the woods somewhere. I found her again and asked her what she was suppose to tell me.
She said something ridiculous like "You're the bomb."
I said no, and told her she was suppose to tell me that I was in a dream.
Then I tried to have a direct mental connection with her. I put my hands on her head. I was feeling very horny. She began to morph and turned into a cat-like creature. Then I woke up.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

March 29, 2011: I was in a meditation class, in my mother's old ballet studio. We were sitting on the floor in rows. The teacher walked around instructing us.
We were suppose to feel something. Other students felt whatever it was they were meant to feel, but I never felt anything.
Most of the class left early. I staid and talked with the teacher, a lady maybe in her 40s.

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I became lucid through WILD method.
I floated out of bed, in the air. I wanted to see my dream guide. I said out load that I opened myself to her higher guidance. She did not appear. I walked through the house, repeating my intent.
i saw an open drier with laundry in it, and there was cat poop stuck to the bottom of my feet, barefoot.
(note: When I was younger, we had a cat that died in the drier. So that's what the open drier in my lucid dream made me think of.)

I said out load that I wanted help from my dream guide, help with dealing with or getting rid of fear and worry.
I felt myself waking up.
I re-entered a dream and saw Eddie (who is 9) outside through a glass sliding door. I did something to scare him. Then I grabbed him and stretched his mouth open and shaped him into a round kitten. The kitten ball floated in the air.

I was outside on the patio where the wood was stacked. I lightly punched the floating ball of kitten and it floated away. I saw another cat and asked her if my dream guide was around. The cat just acted like a cat. I tried to make the cat into something else, but it didn't work. She looked dead for a moment, but then was OK.
I talked to the cat, asking why I can't do certain things in my lucid dreams. I said maybe it's because I said I couldn't do it.
I must have felt that I was waking up, because I lied down on the patio and tried to WILD again, then realized I was still dreaming.

I thought of something I knew I could do, which was fly. I jumped from the patio and swung from a tree branch, but did not fly. I was like "What the hell?!"
I climbed up a tree trunk, to the sawed off top, and jumped and flew. i flew around a large tree with long, creepy branches that looked like bird-like monsters. I landed on a building ledge next to the tree.

I was having trouble flying. It felt like i was holding two cloths in my hands that I used as wings, and they were getting twisted. I tried turning it into a blanket to use as wings, like I use to do when I was little. But that didn't work either.
Then I saw N and called to her. She ran away playfully. I thought I didn't have time to chase after her. I turned around and saw two of her friends. Then I felt myself waking up again.

I thought for a second that I had woken up, but then realized I was still in a dream. I found N at a table with friends. I removed her pants and underwear and we were about to have sex when I woke up again. This time I decided to get up and write everything down.


Notes: Good points: i remembered my intent to find my dream guide and I was rather persistent about it, at least in the first part.
I was able to continue the lucid dreaming even after partially waking up, by not moving.
Not so good points: I didn't find my dream guide, and other things didn't work well either. I usually don't have any trouble flying in my lucid dreams.
Perhaps I should try doing things in dreams with no expectations at all. When I try having expectations, I always have doubts, or negative expectations that effect my results.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

March 25, '11: I was trying to find somewhere to sleep.
I think I laid down in a hallway and did a WILD within the dream. I became lucid, and said "This is a dream, so I can do anything I want."
I picked up a ukulele and strummed on it a bit, tunelessly.
There was a girl there. I held her hands and said this was a dream, but also very real, and I touched her face. Then I attempted to stabilize the dream.
I told the girl that I wanted to open myself to higher guidance. I said "higher source" at first by accident, then "higher source of guidance."
The girl seemed annoyed or put off by my statement. I got down on my knees, looking up at her, and repeated my intent. Everything got a bit brighter. she became naked and we had sex for a moment. she or I asked how this would help with the guidance.
Then I became scared and asked how I could overcome nightmares. I got no response, then woke up.

I WILDed again. It was dark. I felt along a wall and eventually gained sight. I looked in a mirror and asked for help with finding "higher guidance." Nothing happened. I put my head out a window and asked again.
I heard something and slid out the window, into another room. There was a woman and more mirrors. I dis some stuff in the mirrors, and the woman gave me a BJ. In the mirror, it looked like thee was a man with a penis for a head.
There was an elevator. A small, skinny man fell down into the room. I was expecting someone else.
A huge woman who could barely fit slid down the elevator shaft. She landed and kissed me. We danced and kissed. She had a sort of toad-like head, with a wide face.
Then it felt like Alice in Wonderland. I was very small for a moment. My legs were sore. I climbed into bed, laid down and woke up. My physical body was sore from the position I was in.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

March 20, 2011: Terrible, emotionally exhausting dreams tonight.
In one, I was in an army that was sent to attack and kill innocent people, unprovoked.
Later, I walked through the area and saw the aftermath. There were dead and injured people all over, and lots of damage to the building.
It felt like I was in a movie, but everything was real.

Another dream, same night: I was in a restaurant that was attacked. The windows were smashed in. A bunch of people held out babies and used them as weapons. The babies vomited all over the place.

Nonlucid, lucid, partially lucid

March 17, 'll: Entered a dream using the WILD method, with difficulty. I felt like I was floating in the air, and then I was floating on the ocean, rocking with the waves, looking up at the sky. It was very relaxing. I could hear the waves and wind, which I think was actually my breathing.


Then I was swinging upside down by a rope, from a tree over the driveway. There was a party around me. I was not lucid. My sister was annoyed at me. She and her friends left in a car.
I walked into the garage and to the front yard.

I became lucid again, and flew around the trees in the yard. I remembered one of my goals, to ask a cat if it could be my dream guide. I saw one cat but it was not one I wanted to ask.
Inside the house, I asked our oldest cat, Bender, if he could be my dream guide. I told him to do something specific for yes or no. He just meowed and acted like a normal cat. I told him that he could talk because this was a dream, but he didn't.

In the kitchen, I smashed a statue on the ground and sprayed water on the walls and soaked a hand-made thing hanging on the wall. The paint began to run. I sprayed the water on an electric device and felt an electric shock.
Then I met other dreamers. One guy was on the counter. I was not fully lucid and I was acting strange. I apologized and explained that I was not in full control.

Another guy wanted to show me something. He opened the grandfather clock, moved one of the weights to the face of the clock, somehow, and did something with one of the hands.
The clock began to play a little tune because of what he did. I said "that's awesome," and asked how he figured that out. He was just messing around and discovered that the clock would do that.
I said that some things in dreams are very cool, while some things are not (scary things, for example).

I was about to leave. The guy said "see you later." So I asked for his name so I could find him again, either in a dream or in waking life. He asked if I wanted his email, but I said I couldn't remember something like that.
I told him that in waking life I am rather quite.
He told me his name and gave me a small piece of paper with Egyptian writing on it. It also had his "name" on it, as a symbol that looked like a beetle, or a sea turtle. Basically it was just an oval with two curved lines sticking out the sides.
The guy had a short beard and longish dirty blond hair.

I said "where will this be when I wake up?"
He said it will be "behind my ear," or "a tug at my ear," and I will see it "on the hood of a car," like the car's logo symbol. I put the paper in my pocket.

I left the house through a window, and flew and smashed through glass walls of another house.
I saw my family at a dinner table. I kept going and said "bye fucks!"
I floated near a place where there use to be woods. There were ghost-like people there, suffering. The woods had been cursed, or poisoned.

Nonlucid, lucid, partially lucid

March 15, '11: When attempting to WILD, I had a mini dream in which I was in church and uncertain about reality. I suspected I might be dreaming, and worried that if I wasn't, something felt odd.
Then I woke up a bit and realized I had been dreaming. I began to move my right dream arm.
Then I floated up out of bed.
I flew around the room, swooping down and back up again. I wanted to ascend to a higher plane, but I wasn't sure how. I grabbed a plant, pulled it from its pot and tried to absorb it, or merge with it. It only sort of worked.

The room was dark. I stopped flying and went around the room turning on the lights, but it was still dark. I opened the window, put my had out and asked the dream for help making it daylight. A voice said "OK" and then the sky lit up, making everything brighter.

I was outside. I wanted to make a little private world, with one of my female characters there. I called her Emily, even though that's not her name.
I asked the dream for help with getting her to be there, and said please. When I turned around, there were some professional-looking people standing around. I picked a couple of them to help. One was a scientist lady with curly red hair in a ponytail.
I told them what the character looked like, but they already knew. They walked off to do something, to make her, I guess.

There were also lots of workers around, building small houses and other structures. I was happy to see progress being made. Unfortunately, I woke up before seeing if the character would actually show up.

Nonlucid, Lucid, Partially lucid

March 13, '11: I was in a theater, watching a terrible movie about a girl who was part dog. She had a small furry tail and she said "woof." I think the movie was for kids, even though it seemed somewhat sexual.
There was a toy helicopter flying around overhead, controlled by someone in the audience.
I thought I was stuck there, but then i remembered that I could do anything I want, even fly. I thought I was possibly in the same world as the day before, when my mother was lost.

I got up from my seat and walked down the steep steps. I became more lucid and began to fly and picked up a girl. I talked to her a little and almost told her that this was a dream, but decided not to. She had a weird voice, like a guy trying to sound like a girl.
Suddenly someone behind me poked me in the butt, right in the middle, with his finger. It was some guy with curly blond mop hair. I was annoyed but decided to greet him friendly so he wouldn't continue being a jerk. His eyes were like white marbles with a little cartoon person drawn on them. I said they looked cool.

Then I got into a discussion about racism with a black man who was not interested in talking to me.
I walked outside and lost lucidity.
There was a long path, covered in mud, with a metal fence on one side. The fence was loose and the path was partially flooded, in the middle of a large body of water.

The path was blocked and then I was stuck because I couldn't go back the way I came. I was standing on ice, floating in the water. I called out for help. A lady in a boat came to help me.
Then I remembered that I could fly, but I wanted in the boat anyway.

Note:This is the second of two recent dreams in which I called out for help and a woman showed up to assist me.

Nonlucid Lucid Partially lucid

Some of my favorite dreams are those in which I am visiting another world, or dimension. Even they are not lucid dreams, I think these are very interesting. Tonight's dream was one of these types.

March 12, '11: Dr. Farnsworth, from the cartoon show Futurama, had a dinner party, with important guests. The food was made from anti-matter, or dark matter. I think he called it "black matter" once.
One woman imploded from eating the food.

I was waiting for my mother to come out from a nearby building. I drew a cartoon bouquet of flowers (on the ground?).
Mom came out from the building. She told me she had said I could have a wank while I waited.
Then I was talking to her on a phone. She said that the sun was always up in this world. I told her I had noticed that too. The place didn't have nights.

At this point I was partially lucid. I knew I was in a world that was not my normal reality. I tried to think of the name of the place where we were, but I didn't know it.
Mom stopped talking and the phone was silent. I said "hello?" but got no response.
So now my mother was lost somewhere in this dream world.

I walked a little way and asked a guy if he had seen my mom. I picked him up on my lap, or on my knee and said "She's a crazy lady with slightly wavy brown hair, a big mouth, and talks a lot. She has a long neck like me."
The man talked, giving me directions somewhere. I was distracted by a beautiful night sky, with lots of stars and two moons. I thought it was interesting because the city, or world, had never had nighttime before.

I had to ask the man to repeat what he said. He told me where to go, but warned me not to press any of the buttons. I don't remember why. I walked back and into a building, and jumped into a very small lift. This is where the buttons were. The lift worked automatically and carried me up to another floor.

I felt like I was familiar with how this world worked and I was confident that I could find my way around with any accidents or something.
I was on a floor with big machines and people working. They wore goggles and aprons, and maybe gloves. They were shoveling something off the floor.
I went down the hall and turned left. There I saw Allison. I wondered if it was the real Allison or just someone who looked like her.
In a narrow dead end hall to the right, I saw my mother and Eddie. I was glad they were not lost.

This dream is also rather interesting because most dreams with my mother are very stressful and we argue a lot.

nonlucid lucid partially lucid

March 11, '11: I was the principal of a middle or high school. I was in a towel. A small robot bug kept following me and going under me. I didn't like it at all. I picked up the robot bug and bent it, breaking it in the middle. Then I threw it at a huge aquarium in my office.
The glass shattered and the water spilled out onto the floor, along with a large salamander-like creature.
Then I was myself. The room was flooded, a few feet deep, and I was trapped in there with the salamander and a very big python.

I was scared and called out for help. I hid in the back of the room, in a small space above the water, with a cat.
A woman came to help, possibly the nurse. She took a pillow and blanket and placed them on top of the water for me to step on. The snake was going under the water, its tail was still above the water. My cat ran for the open door and grabbed onto the snake's tail. I was afraid the python would kill her. But she bit the snake and got away.

The woman carried me out of the room and saved me. Then it turned sexual as she began to play with my penis.
But then I woke up.

Nonlucid Lucid Partially lucid False awakening

March 10, '11: This WILD led directly into a false awakening. I got up out of bed and went to the kitchen. The cabinet opened slightly by itself and I was a little scared. I went back into my room and thought to do a reality check. As I realized I was dreaming, I sort of dived or fell into bed and woke up.
But I didn't move and I entered a lucid dream. I did the nose pinch to confirm that I was dreaming. I looked in a small mirror on my wall and the reflection scared me.
I rubbed my hands together and looked at them to stabilize. Then I licked the blanket on my bed because I remembered the thread on the DV forum about licking things in lucid dreams. The blanket didn't feel or taste like anything. I licked the carpet and it felt like you would expect it to. There was even lint still on my tongue after.

I left my room and saw a cat lying in the hallway. I asked him if he could be my dream guide (this was my current dream goal. I thought since there is almost always a cat in my dreams, maybe one could be my dream guide.) He just grunted and I took that to mean "no."
I went into the kitchen and said "It's me!" meaning, the dreamer. I'm not sure what happened next, but I woke up.

Again, I didn't move and I started another lucid dream, back in my old bedroom. there was a larger mirror this time. I played around with my reflection, dancing and moving my arms around. i tried to poke my finger through my palm, but it didn't work properly.
then I licked the metal bed post and it tasted weird. I left my room again, repeating "I'm dreaming."
There were lots of cats in the kitchen, running around and playing, and fighting some. I wanted to ask my cat, Wilton, if he could be my dream guide, but he wouldn't stop long enough.

I picked up a white kitten that I did not recognize and asked if it it could be my dream guide. The cat did not respond. It just acted like a playful kitten. I asked if this were a lesson to show that I wasn't in full control. If so, I said, "that lesson has already been beat into the ground."
The cat turned into something scary and I woke up.

Nonlucid Lucid Partially lucid

Successful WILD

March 8, '11: Laying on my back in bed, I felt that I was close to sleep. I imagined moving my arms and it began to feel real. I stood up out of bed. I saw a cat and tested to see if it could see me or if it would be scared. The cat acted normally. I looked at my bed and did not see my body in it. I commented on this.

I was in my childhood home, as usual. I rubbed my hands together to stabilize the dream, intending to stay in the dream for a long time.
I tried to remember what to do and remembered that I had already asked for my spirit name in a previous lucid dream.
I said "my dream name is Justin. No... ________!" I got it wrong the first time, but then corrected myself. (it is nothing like "Justin").
I said my dream/spirit name again as I walked into the kitchen. Another cat was on the table. He grew gigantic when I said my name and did a hand gesture at him. I was happily surprised by this.

It was dark outside, so I decided to make it daytime. I commanded it to be daylight, possibly using my dream name again. It became very bright outside, like a huge explosion. Then it became a beautiful sunny day. I saw Adam through the kitchen window, playing with his dog or cat with a ball.
I was very pleased with my control, and that the dream obeyed my desires. I made my cat levitate a couple of feet off the floor. Then I intended to go outside through the door without opening it. I jumped at the wall and hit it. I tried again and this time went through the wall with no trouble.

I flew and said "I am a god of this dream world!" (I said "a god" rather than "the god" because I recognized that there were other forces also in control of the dream).
I said "I want to see my dream guide and Sheila, now!" I might have felt that someone was about to show up, but I woke up.
Perhaps I didn't attempt to stabilize enough.

Dream Lucid Partially lucid

March 4, 2011: I had a sort of successful WILD, but the lucid dreams were unstable. I entered a dream and ended up on the floor with N. We made out some and maybe had sex.
I woke up and entered another lucid dream. I was in church and I had sex with several people there.
I tried to go back to "Sahn" (a place I visited in a previous dream) by going out the back door. Outside, I called out for Sheila. I remembered to try using emotion to summon her, so I fell to the ground and pretended to cry. I rolled over onto my back and felt the dream start to fade. I yelled "Don't wake up!" but it was too late and I woke up.

Dream Lucid Partially lucid

Feb. 28, '11: I was walking up the driveway, to the road. A car drove by and I hid behind a wall.
I walked down the road and another car drove towards me. I moved and tried to avoid it by jumping over it, but the car swerved, hopped, and floated in the air.

I saw police car lights flashing up ahead. i got into the back of a truck or something. A female cop walked by.
I was partially lucid by this point. I said to the woman "can I ask what's going on?" referring to the police cars and lights.
She said "yes."
I said "will you tell me?"
and she said "no."
I thought this was slightly amusing.
I told her that she was sexy. Then I lifted her up and laid her down in the truck bed with me and we had sex. I made sure to not wake up while doing it.

Across the street I saw another woman, at a desk, in a cubicle-like room. She had a very pointy nose that I made her stab into the desk. Then she sort of turned into a pencil and I broke it.
Then I was inside another office, with a man at a desk. I was on top of the desk. I told him this was my "dream bank." I wanted to stay in the dream after he left the room (for some reason, I thought this was an issue).
I also told him I wanted to look through his desk drawers after he left. He didn't care. I put on a scratchy dark gray sock he gave me.
After he left, I looked through his desk, but I didn't find anything interesting.

Dream Lucid Partially lucid

Feb. 24, '11: I was in a car, passenger, I think. An angel was driving a car behind us. The girl in the car with me said the angel didn't like me. There was a big truck beside us, the angel car did something to put us in danger and we almost crashed.
I thought I was ok, but then I realized i was floating above the road and I had died.
I was Buffy (from Buffy the Vampire Slayer), and also partially George (from Dead Like Me). I saw my body on the road, along with the girl who was in the car with me. I was dead and a ghost. I became very upset and started crying.

I had been working with dead people for a long time. Now I was one.
Then I was in the kitchen, sitting on the counter and washing dirt off my feet in the sink.

Emotionally exhausted, I was led to a room and told I could stay there as long as I wanted/needed to, until I was ready to move on. To the rest of the world, I was dead. The place was like an apartment for ghosts.
There were three other dead people in room next to mine. They had been staying there for many years. I had known them when I was alive, but not when they were alive.
I sat in a chair, with a woman, in her room. She was comforting me.
I became angry at a cat that was bothering me, and I yelled "I'll kill you!" Then I started crying again.
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I was walking down the driveway, towards my parents' house. At first I though I was just imagining in and now yet asleep. Then I thought I was possibly awake and really there. I asked myself if I had just walked to the mailbox. I couldn't remember, so I concluded that I was dreaming.

I found some small pools of water among green moss and grass. I dipped my hands in the water and lifted some in my cupped hands. I thought about drinking it, but the water wasn't very clean looking.
Then it got cloudy and rather windy. I didn't like it.

I called up to the sky and asked the dream what my spiritual name was. I cupped my palms over my ears to listen, because it was windy and noisy. I heard a voice respond, and I said "thank you" to the sky.

I want to keep the name that the dream gave me private. In the dream, I didn't remember what the name meant, but I knew I had heard it before. After I woke, I had an idea of what it meant and I wasn't sure if I should accept it. Later, looked it up. I was mostly right about what it meant, but there were other things about it that I think makes it OK to use in my dreams.

Then I said, to myself "if this is my dream, who makes the wind and the clouds? A part of myself?" It was getting very dark and windy, like a storm. The sky voice said something I didn't understand.
I was blown away, into the air.
It's like the dream was showing me that it was stronger than me.
I ended up in a room, floating. There was a man who was not solid, who then disappeared.
A hand and arm went through my chest. There was a weird toy or doll hanging from the ceiling.