Recent DJ Posts

As FK's Nicholas, I saw an image of a vase of white roses, bleeding a few trails of red blood - I believed that this was a hallucination, thinking of it as "a bit of silliness" - and then I saw a mental image of Janette lying on a white couch, looking unwell, somehow connected with those roses. Now I'm sitting on that couch, and Janette's lying on her side with her head resting against my thigh, my hand in her hair. We're talking about a particular time in the past when things had been better between the three of us. As we talk, I'm thinking about how easily I revert to this version of myself when I'm around them - without thinking, my body language, my speech patterns change automatically. It's like taking off a mask.

POV shifts to show LaCroix. He's at some kind of charity event. At the moment he's talking to a man near a buffet table, a man he knows in some professional capacity, and a moment comes when he has to either eat or make some excuse. Without hesitating, he puts some item of food in his mouth. As a disembodied observer/Nicholas, I'm incredibly jealous of his ability to do that without flinching. It would make my life so much easier if I could pretend to eat - socialization revolves almost entirely around food and drink, so just imagine how much easier it would be to blend in. After a moment, LaCroix makes a displeased face, reaches for a napkin, and removes the thing in his mouth. He makes some comment about the poor quality of the food this year compared to previous years, and the man he's talking to agrees. LaCroix's posing as a gourmet, picky about what he eats - it's his usual trick, insulting the food wherever he goes. They make a joke about not being able to trust the food in a place that has such skinny staff, and then the man LaCroix's talking to complains that this event has gone downhill in general - disappointing for such a worthy charity. LaCroix makes a comment about the decline of morality as time goes by. He manages to say this with a straight face.

It was stuffy again so I had a hard time sleeping, and then I woke up out of the blue at 6 A.M. and laid there for a while. But I figured if I could get back to sleep, I'd remember a dream or two at least, and I did.

Dream 1: The first thing I remember thinking when I woke up with this dream was 'Hannibal Lector'. In it, "I" was a doctor checking over a row of patients in bed. I may have been the woman in the Hannibal Lector movies. One was one important guy in particular. [Gap] I'm slipping into a room that the guy is going to be kept in. I wrap an item in a cloth, hoping it won't be found by anyone checking over the room. I need to put something there to identify who left it, so I go look through my desk stuff for a post-it note, but I can't find the ones I'm looking for, so I end up using my "F" letter ones (except they're a solid green unlike in real life, and they're not sticky). I stick it onto something on the bed.

Note: The bed made me think of my aunt's, and I use her room as a loci in my memory palace so I wonder if it came from there.

Dream 2: I'm drawing on a big whiteboard, except it's like an online drawing board so I'm not physically drawing on it. It seems I'm leaving a specific message for someone. A woman comes up to the board and looks at it, and says something about how to draw the zodiac symbols - she proceeds to draw them in black marker, except they're just regular shapes, like circles and triangles. I am confused.

Dream 3: Me and mom are in a building, I think we're looking for my sister. I had given her this card to save on something, perhaps for $3, but she said it wasn't a good deal or something and I was a bit miffed at her. Either it was already dark, or the power then went out as I tried to catch up with her.