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    1. A meeting with my manipulative friend fragment and finding treasure in my house | [05.08.2020]

      by , 08-05-2020 at 04:36 PM (Draeger's Dream Journal and Documentation)
      A meeting with my manipulative friend fragment
      My father has already opened the door after the doorbell rang and my manipulative friend is there and I quickly put a sentence together. The sentence might be an apology to him, something I am trying to prevent myself doing.

      Finding treasure in my house
      I and my father helped some dangerous looking guy with dark skin. He sort of reminds of some guy I knew once, Darren. He wants to find some sort of treasure. At some point he might have had other people helping him, but in the end he was alone with us. The house was somewhat weirdly structured. We were searching around the door to the garden. There is lots of things on the wall you could climb on, and lots you could miss. In the end he finds it and tells us to leave. But I sort of knock him out and find it as well but he woke up again and I run up the stairs towards home. Then one of his partners comes along and says something along the lines of "What do you think you're doing up here, hm?" but I say something like "Of course I can be here, I live up here!" and they say something like "Yeah yeah..." and leave, going down quickly. And then I hear my father talking to the guy from the beginning to distract him so that I can get the treasure. But I notice that the guy would be facing me and that he might notice me anyway because he could hear me so I didn't take the chance. Then I went outside and then ran in and just tried to get the treasure, but he stopped me. I thought about saying that he'd get half, but I didn't know how much the treasure even was worth. I also thought about just knocking him out again, but I thought I wouldn't be strong enough.

      This was after multiple MILD attempts. I woke up multiple times throughout the night and tried to do a MILD nearly every time. Because I woke up often, there were probably some WBTBs.

      Updated 08-05-2020 at 04:38 PM by 96397

      non-lucid , memorable , dream fragment
    2. cxxxi. Lucidity! And self-indulgence

      by , 08-04-2020 at 01:07 PM
      4th August 2020 ~11:30


      Near the end of a stupidly long non-lucid part; I was falling through a pipe, I was with a squad to take something out in a facility. But then as I was falling, everything seemed still.

      I was in a void of sorts and time seemed to pass slower, the others were still here with me. It felt like being in water, and there was a similar visual effect. The squad leader, turned to me and said "you must pick the right one this time!" and I suddenly saw a vision of who to pick.

      Then I was in a room. There were three guardians and some other characters. I picked the one from my vision. It was true that it was the start of a cycle that I was now breaking, at the start of this long non-lucid part I was in a very similar situation.

      But this time I had picked "correctly". As a result, my consciousness shifted, I was now the guardian I'd picked. I noticed my hands, I had three fingers and one thumb. I became lucid but it came slowly, not like in the past.

      There was no "aha!" moment or sudden shift. I realised I was in a version of my mom's first office room. The characters were gone, I think; and to confirm my lucidity further I grabbed a metal shelving unit in the room and threw it through a wall, fully expecting it to go through as if it were a ghost, and it did!

      I wasn't sure what I wanted to do, since I hadn't fully expect to be lucid. I decided to indulge in one of my fantasies and decided to become a giant anthropomorphic lizard. It sort of worked... I saw myself in third person, wearing a labcoat (my artificial dream sign) as an anthro lizard. But I wanted to be myself in first person, I get tired of seeing things in third person in dreams and so I willed it and then was myself as the lizard. I looked down and saw the city-sprawl below me. I had reptilian-like feet with claws and I could see I had an emerald green skin but it was not as dark as I wanted. I tried to give myself different sexual features but it didn't work either.

      I was happy enough the transformation worked in the basic sense in any case and started to have some fun by putting myself against the ground and sort of rubbing along it for lack of better words. I paused and checked my hands again, just having a good look at them. They were hardly as scaly as I'd expected and this felt disappointing but I carried on. I remember noticing the atmosphere effect but oddly enough when I was standing I didn't notice the curvature effect of the planet. I was big enough that I should have been able to notice it.

      While the terrain did get sort of crunched/destroyed/etc by whatever I did, I wasn't able to see the cities in any great amount of detail and could not notice any mountains either. I was too big I suppose. I could feel my tail at several points but overall the feel of my body was mostly whole/complete.

      Spoiler for Self-indulged arousal:

      After this self-indulging, I realised the city/landscape I'd been having fun on and with was really just a square section in a rather large room. At the edges, the atmosphere effect sort of cut off, it was interesting.

      I was standing up and looked around the room for the first time; lots of metal pipes and dark metal things, like grates and slits where some natural light came through from. It had an extremely industrial look. As I looked around I still felt that I was very big, but the room's scale made me feel smaller in a sense, despite how much room I took.

      My lucidity was fading a little and I'd become a bit bored, I didn't expect to end my fantasy so soon but this was obviously the result of not pre-planning any of this. I saw a character less than half my size, by a sewer-tunnel looking bit. I approached, I asked him "Who are you?", quite curious about this metal-flesh sort of monster, the look only describable as being drawn from many such archetypes.

      He gave me a reply veiled in mystery, that I cannot recall anymore, but he did not answer my question in its most basic form and I didn't think of asking again. I got bored of him and decided he was quoting from something, but I forget what he was saying, unfortunately.

      I looked around again. This felt so different from my previous lucid experiences. I was calm, and it didn't take much effort to be calm; the dream was far less vivid and detailed than other lucids and indeed even less than some non-lucids, but I appreciated this moment. I enjoyed not feeling my daily pain.

      Then, out of nowhere, I heard a deep echoing voice. It told me "You must kill your brother, remember?". Some less conscious part of me, replied automatically "I know, I know! But not now." Before I could add anything of my own will, the voice spoke again to the effect of "Very well, he shall be kept alive for now." The voice faded completely and I simply finished by again automatically saying "Good."

      I didn't appreciate this family-related intrusion into my lucidity but realised it was from a deeper part and so didn't really wish to alter it.

      My lucidity may have been fading again but I decided to simply explore these strange halls, carelessly stepping over that square world I'd been playing with earlier and heading for a doorway on the opposite corner from where I was. There were many artificial warm light accents around the metal halls. I eventually found myself on a gantry bit and there were random people both there and on a lower tier. I played around with some telekinesis on some red and blue barrels, trying to lob them but doing so poorly at first. I started to gain a more intuitive understanding as I did it but it did not feel as "mentally driven" as I'd expected, having to move my hands a fair bit.

      My form had been consistent through my lucidity, I still had reptilian traits and my hands were clawed now, I recall. A random human character next to me looked up to me and said "Don't throw them with your arms like a real barrel." Or something like that. I understood from this to use hand motions more. I tried lifting a barrel and pulling it toward me, having done so too much and then pushing it forward a little more with some related hand motions.

      I tried to hit a person in the lower tier with the barrel but it didn't quite work or something. Then I went down some stairs. I was in a mall area and my lucidity was fading but not gone. A dream character was upset with me, he was some manager for the mall. "You're ruining everything with your lucidity!" He said, or something.

      He was extremely upset that I was doing whatever I pleased. There was a woman nearby I'd somehow gotten fired or something (but she was all the more happy about it) and the man became angry and he wanted to have a serious go at me now.
      But I somehow just turned it against him, kind of willing some help from the woman and she automatically started defending me, distracting the manager man. I was no longer lucid at this point and had been letting myself go along with the dream too much. Eventually I just woke up.


      Spoiler for Notes (in spoiler due to their length):

      Updated 08-04-2020 at 05:12 PM by 95293

      non-lucid , memorable , side notes , lucid
    3. A Visualization Experience

      by , 08-03-2020 at 12:14 PM
      I started with my usual routine, trying to stay still I imagined a rectangle, when fully stable I turn him into 3D cube, after a little more I start to rotate him on his axis, when rotation become fluid I enter "the Zone" and can begin to make more complex visualization.

      I visualize a long corridor with a bright light at end of it, like a tunnel, when I came out of the tunnel into the bright light, I suddenly appeared on a rooftop. I was dressed into a Jedi robe uniform and had a light saber on my belt, a guy of the other side of the rooftop was calling me, a jedi woman was about to fall from roof into a lava pit, "save her" he said. I used force jump and land just above her, suddenly two options appeared in front of my view, "kill her" on the left and "save her" on the right, I said to myself "third option then, Fear will not control me", I used force push and push her in the lava pit, the I draw my blue light saber (it was exactly as in the movie) and run him through my chest, I felt him going through me, but there was no pain. I lose balance and fell in the lava pit myself, I was sinking into the red lava and like my body was getting hot(the whole time I was feeling my body in the bed). I saw her sinking several meters of me, but I couldn't move my arms or legs anymore so I use the force pull instead and we bump into each other, I said to myself "I won't leave you here" and imagine a blue light surrounding us like a force shield, my body started emitting blue energy making a bubble around us, the hot feeling stop and like my body become super light, we started to sink very quickly, then I felt my body on bed starting to distort and bend 90 degree and sink into the bed, it started from my legs, then my knees, my torso next, but when my spine bend and sink I couldn't control it, the sensation was too strong, So I open my eyes, of course I was still in my bed and my body was still in the position I start.

      Lol it was really some experience, I said to myself and took a deep breath.
      lucid , memorable
    4. A transcendental experience - the most trippy stuff ever

      by , 08-03-2020 at 12:12 PM
      I just made a cool experiment, at my napping time. Instead of trying to WILD, I said to myself verbally in my head that I am going to observe myself falling asleep very slowly. I think lucid dreaming take place on the surface of Dreaming aka the Rem which translate to more awareness and control of what is happening in the dream, but in the deeper layers of sleep or the phase, control is harder to achieve, but everything is much more stable and detailed like in the real world. But WILDing and falling asleep are two different directions, when you try to WILD it is like you are halting the natural process which the mind is going through every day.

      The experiment I did today gave me the opportunity not to halt the natural processes of falling asleep, but to flow with it. To fall asleep a little slower and to have tiny dots of consciousness I said to myself that I must not fall asleep completely because I need to attend to other task, additionally I grab my index finger on right hand with my left hand to feel some pressure awareness and I totally let go to the sleep urge, while just observing what is happening.

      I start to see different colors, shapes, sceneries(while not focus my vision on anything particular that was happening),
      suddenly I was in a book store, the book titles were perfectly readable, my vision closer to books names then suddenly everything go far far away, I was falling through some colorful holes(i totally lost the sensation of my physical body), saw a human face, the image became grey like from x-ray and then transparent, I see his brain, something was pulling me inside his mind, I felt many different feelings while I was holding tightly to my tiny amount of consciousness, something pull me even deeper, I saw an infinity field of minds which were connected through strings made from emotions, thoughts, ideas and other stuff I don't understand, a giant network of consciousness, it was pulling me even deeper and harder and I saw stuff I totally can't describe, in that moment a voice from far away echoed, I couldn't understand it at first, but after a while finally reached me, I heard my best friend voice: "If you go any deeper I won't be able to catch you, listen to my voice and catch it, I will pull you out", I attach my dot of consciousness to his voice and felt a strong pulling out sensation and a second later I wake up. I felt deeply relaxed.

      Lol that stuff was just bizarre and hilarious and can't wait to try it again.

      What do you think about it, share your thoughts.
      lucid , memorable
    5. Music inspiring experience

      by , 08-03-2020 at 12:00 PM
      This was my first lucid dream in which a digital music device was working as intended. A fully operational iPod was given to me by a dream character and who said the music will relax me. The digital interface was fully operational, the memory was full of songs I never heard in real life. I listened to 3 songs, each two and half minutes long. That was very awe inspiring moment, so if you are a music artist, you can try to summon an iPod next time you become lucid.
      non-lucid , memorable
    6. Entity abducted me from my dream

      by , 08-03-2020 at 11:59 AM
      It began as a normal dream in which I was driving a car back to home. Suddenly in front of me, out of nowhere a giant mirror like portal appeared and I drove through him. It transferred me at other planet, real or imaginary, but I believe it was a imaginary one. Everything around me was like a dead wasteland and wad filled with hundreds of man like creatures, which had grey skin and red eyes. They were roaming like zombies with no direction or orientation and they acted like they can't notice me. They were looking kind intimidating and scary, so my first thought that came to me was they are going to attack me and the moment that happen they start attacking me for real, from all over directions, I tried to run down them with my car, but they were too many, my car couldn't start anymore, they broke my glasses with the intention to reach me, they were howling at me. I got out from the glass rooftop and start kicking and punching them out of the car rooftop in win or lose situation. An idea suddenly came to me that maybe they are sensing my fear and attack, and with nothing else to do I follow the idea and stopped all of my emotions, suddenly all creatures stopped at their tracks and were moving aimlessly again like they couldn't sense me, I immediately thought so everything of this was just a test and used my blank state of mind or like some call it, the zen state. I closed my eyes and just let go of everything and began to fall backwards. The moment I hit the floor, the entire planet surface folded into fours, like made from paper, they I saw the entire planet did the same from orbit, then saw the entire galaxy fold in four all around me and just like that I open my eyes sitting on a chair.

      The chair was made from strange material and was oval in nature like egg. I was in completely empty room with strange symbol's all over the walls, which I couldn't read. Starting from the chair they were a path with glowing symbols that were changing constantly like a countdown to something, at the end of that path of symbols, on the wall there was doorlike portal. I got to it and touch it, a sensation hit my mind, it was a Doorway to the fifth dimension, the entities were giving me a choice to abandon my physical body and to join them in fifth dimension and there was a countdown to my response. The test I passed served as a sign that I was ready to join their ranks. I moved my hand through the portal, but couldn't do it, I still have things to accomplish on this side, I conveyed my answer to them through my thoughts and sat back on the chair. The chair began to move and little before I leave this space a entity appeared next to the portal, which bowed his head a little and waved his hand for goodbye and gone through the portal. When I left this space I immediately woke up in my bed.
      lucid , memorable
    7. Reached Focus 100

      by , 08-03-2020 at 11:56 AM
      Began as a non-lucid dream, I was chased by monsters through the floors of something like a hotel when I reached the underground spa floor, out of nowhere a dream character grabbed me and threw me into the pool, I tried to get out but he used water manipulation to keep me inside. In times like this I always become semi-lucid and start using lucid powers, this time was no different, I tried to counter him with my own water manipulation, but he was very strong, he was drowning me in the pool, I was holding my breath but I was on my limit, suddenly a thought popped in my mind, why I must struggle, why I need to fight back, why I need to do anything at all, just let go. I open my mouth and let the water to run through my body, I (my dream body) drowned and sank to the bottom of the pool. In that moment of absolutely steadiness my mind became calm as the water surface, my nonbody self popped from my dream body leading me to lucidity, but this time was different, I was my nonbody and my dream body at the same time. My dream body became light as the air and start to float up, coming out of the water, while I (my nonbody) was floating around me. The DC was wondering how I'm still alive, after I drowned up. I was always curious about the the nature of DC's, having many theories about their existence and why they are getting irritated for calling them not real.

      I open my dream body eyes, realising that I have two viewpoints, one perspective from my dream body and one from my nonbody, giving me a total 360 degree of vision, ultimately reaching 100 Focus. My mind was moving so peacefuly and focused like never before, like one second in this state was like a hour of deep thinking in wake world. The DC was cursing me and wanted to fight with me.

      I said "begone" and all DC's and dream monsters vanish in thin air, like they never existed in first place. I observed my own state, which led me to a new realization.

      Finally left alone I try to explore as much as possible of this dream world, the speed I was moving while exploring was terrific, I visited a thousand rooms in just a mere of seconds, searching for the source. I couldn't reached it, the doors were endless, I felt that I can't maintain that state of mind any longer, so I just stood still for a couple of seconds analyzing my sorounding with my 360 vision and my computing capabilities of that state. Just before my focus to collapse I reached to a realization. I always theorising that dream world act as a maze.

      Next time when I get a stable lucid dream, I will penetrate the forth wall looking for the source.
      memorable , lucid
    8. Me and my cats running from demons at a recurring school | [02.08.2020]

      by , 08-02-2020 at 04:09 PM (Draeger's Dream Journal and Documentation)
      Me and my cats running from demons at school
      Someone I don't remember has brought me to school, and I trust him but he's involved in some magic ordeal. He might have
      brought me there since he thinks I'll be safe there for a while. I am supposed to do my homework, which I do. I also seem to
      have brought my cats and am supposed to take care of one other cat which I don't know. They all just jump on the window
      sill and watch the outside world as I continue to do work. But then there is something, I think it's an animal which is
      possessed, suddenly starts banging on the window, slowly breaking it, but for a few seconds I don't really notice. But then I
      do notice and quickly push the cats off the sill and tell them to follow me, which, surprisingly, works on all of them. I run into
      the wrong direction, and then quickly turn around. I push the cats a little to hurry them and run out the door into some sort
      of teacher hall. It's only about 3-5 meters long and there's a room at the end and on both sides, both right in the middle of
      the two side walls. A woman comes up to me and looks at me with a confused expression. Suddenly the plot changes a bit, and I simply don't know where I have to be, but I am still running from a demon. She says that she doesn't know, in a sort of "You should know that yourself..." undertone.

      I just noticed that I have a recall streak, which is pretty cool.
      The school is also a recurring location. I'm excited to map it out once I get to have consistent lucids.

      Updated 08-02-2020 at 04:12 PM by 96397

      non-lucid , memorable
    9. cxxix.

      by , 08-02-2020 at 12:00 PM
      Interruption to the DJ catch up to put one from the past night. Some particularly detailed dreams, but I ended up having so much initial recall of so many dreams that in the end I let go of many and only made notes of a couple. Of note is the fact that last night I took for the first time a multi-vitamin B complex. It somehow did increase dream vividness far beyond what I expected.

      2nd August 2020


      In space. In a game like Freelancer, flying a ship with a similar camera view as the game would have. I am on a server and I interact with some other people, but it's a small and private server.

      I remember at some point discussing something with someone and then bringing up a list looking at all the potential guns and turrets there were. There were Nomad weapons that went by names such as "Redeemer" and came in three different marks. I remember thinking that it was silly to call it redeemer because there should be a Class Ten weapon using that as an acronym. The turrets list was like a "give mode" menu too, but I didn't have access to that function.

      Everything was so detailed, I remember asteroids and distant nebulas and overall the sense of scale was just about right. I'm not sure I flew with a specific aim in mind but I found a Klingon wreckage of a Warbird or something. I shot its turrets so that I could loot them, and I wanted to do so quickly so that someone else couldn't interrupt me or steal them from me.

      Then very close by was a station where I landed my ship. I got out but don't remember doing so physically, and then was inside the station. It was like a hospital mixed a bit with an office, and now the server people were here with me as a group? But something has a Farscape feel to it. Seems poorly lit or dark, but visibility is OK.

      I forget some details but eventually H is with me at some point and we are waiting at the end of some hall. There are other people here, just sitting on some kind of benches, all waiting same as us. It was like a lobby? The light here mostly comes from the floor, a bit blue-ish, not even just a cold light, actually blue-ish. There are some commercial type fridges with the metal framed glass doors and they have cans of drink in them and I open one of them behind someone and fiddle with or organise some cans.

      Then eventually we go through a doorway. We're outside, it's day time, slightly cloudy but bright though I didn't notice shadows properly and we are visiting a church here to do some work. The transition into this area was perfectly seamless.

      The church was unusual, it was very open and seemed to be in the ruins of a massive old cathedral, some parts more ruined than others. But overall there was no "ceiling" to speak of and it was an open church. I could hear the wind and the leaves of tall trees surrounding the area, I could hear this very clearly in the dream.

      The floor was all just grassy turf and there was no flooring really, but there were brand new things and some old things here in the main congregation area of this new church. There was a wooden house of some kind, which was full-size and looked just like the typical thing seen in a nativity, just bigger effectively.

      But two kids were following us, they seemed curious. Though I got the feeling from H it'd be better if they weren't following us, so as we approached a wall panel between some old pillars, we went behind a wooden carved statue of Jesus. The statue featured prominently the colours red and blue on the clothing, and His hair was curly and dark, as was His beard. He did have a crown of thorns, too. The colours seemed a bit worn but probably better than could be expected for something out here in the elements.

      Anyway, H pushed some panel behind the statue and we went through and it shut. Though the structure was very open, this didn't really limit the kids following us, but it made it more difficult; H then went around more sneakily trying to just get past them or spook them or something. Either way, the whole time H seemed to know what he was doing and I just followed his lead as with any normal job.

      One of the kids was gone at this point, but the other one remained and followed more closely now; his father or grandfather appeared and was trying to convince him to go back with him, but the child seemed insistent in following us and seeing what we were doing. The man apologised for the behaviour, clearly nervous and feeling a bit foolish in some sense. I did not mind him or the kid so much at this point.

      Eventually we are on a rooftop part of the old cathedral building. It's high, but not as high as it would have been on top of the actual cathedral; I got the sense that this was a secondary, inner, chapel, built to be inside the cathedral itself. We got on the rooftop simply, because the grassy terrain ramped up to it, I recall. It's all leafy and there's lots of Autumn-coloured leaves on top, a contrast to the green grasses from earlier. I remember stepping on the leaves and feeling them under my boots, which made me more aware of what I was wearing. I remember walking over and maybe stepping on a dead sapling that was growing here. Its wood was dark and bendy.

      Somehow it's a truly beautiful area and scene but I don't think or realise this in the dream.

      As we get near the opposite end I become concerned and tell everyone to stop. The roof slopes down more quickly ahead and there are no leaves. I start to realise the danger of being on a roof more than before. I tell H, "there are no tiles here, we'll slip right off". So in agreement we start to walk back. I had thoughts of the kid falling and didn't want to feel responsible should something happen, but I also think about how the parent/grandparent would feel should such a thing happen.

      At this point my fear of heights seems to kick in a little and I stick more toward the inner edge, where there's a vertical structure jutting out the middle of the roof; I step up on a stone ledge of sorts and as I keep walking back with a tight grip on some stone stuff, I start to realise there had been a music playing for quite some time, in a quick crescendo now. I could hear a jackdaw or crow cawing for the same amount of time too. These sounds were immensely beautiful and as they became more and more vivid I eventually woke up.

      Dream Fragment:

      Only made brief notes of this one. Dream about visiting a therapist to treat some narcolepsy (that I do not suffer from in real life). I basically kept falling asleep throughout this dream and having different dreams within the dream. In the last part, there was some joint therapy dream thing about recognising that I was asleep, and we had a timed round to shoot enemies and shoot their limbs off with guns.

      Then an old skeleton is under some bushes or canopy on some grass. It was Kerrigan's skeleton? The front of the skull was missing or smashed, but some of the lower jaw mandible was intact. Someone took off what was the bones of a tail part of the skeleton and then I or someone else tossed the full skeleton towards someone, Sol, I think? She suddenly had to go though, and we all criticised her for doing this every time.


      - A small Spartan-like nation? They had a strong military that seemed American in some sense and they were testing some nuclear weapons and special bullets. It was sunny. Lots of concrete structures.

      - There sure is a lot to make note of here, and I didn't even record all the detail of the first dream fully, it would have taken me too long and most of it is ultimately filler in some sense. But I greatly enjoyed that dream's experience.
      - I probably remembered scraps of at least five long dreams in total, but all dreams were fairly vivid. They also all felt like they changed very quickly.

      - In a between-period of sleeping and not sleeping after my initial waking up, I tried to focus my mind on drawing but did not have any dreams relating to that or art in general.

      - The children following us were both boys, probably between the ages of 6-10. I don't remember having a great look at them, mostly because they followed us from behind most of the time.
      - This first dream is the longest dream sequence I have dreamt of for quite a long time now.

      - In the second dream, the skeleton was whole, all joined together, something that I know in waking life is impossible except if it had been put together as a museum piece of some kind. The bones were particularly yellowed and somewhat pitted.
      - The guns/shooting thing probably came about from playing KF quite a bit with H lately.
      - The weapons-testing in the scraps dream likely came about from a general enjoyment of controlled loud noises and explosions (despite their dangers and harmful nature).

      - The therapist figure seems to be recurring a little recently. I think it's part is an inner representation of a guide because I have often sought help from therapists for guidance with the psychological side of life and because I've had some good ones, I suppose I feel on some level that they can be very useful guides, even when they say things I'm not happy with or don't agree with.
      - This type of figure is also ironically likely to be the antithesis of my frustrations with healthcare systems; these dream therapists actually care about me and there is no payment or any such thing involved, there is a genuine feel of interest in helping me as if they were devoted to that.
      - The narcolepsy and the falling asleep thing may have been subconscious cues about dreaming reality.
    10. Subnautica related dream with intense feelings | [??.??.2019/2020]

      by , 08-01-2020 at 05:11 PM (Draeger's Dream Journal and Documentation)
      Subnautica-like dream
      I am in some sort of very dark abandoned hospital, nearly everything made out of stainless steel, even floor and walls, with no sign of decoration or anything else that would make one feel in any way happy, or even at all positive. There's blood everywhere, and it's too silent. I walk through it, and I think I discover another person.

      Next thing I remember is looking for something outside in the water in a small submarine, like the seamoth, in some sort of kelp biome reminiscent of Subnautica, but different. I get whatever it was that I was looking for and go back to some sort of base, which you enter by going under a sort of large hydraulic opening which opens as you approach it, and you go through to the surface of the water, and it closes again, and you are inside and can swim a few meters to dry land. There were other people, and we were working on something.

      Then, the next thing we do is go to some exceedingly exceedingly large cave, in which a creature just a bit smaller lives. It's literally many many kilometers large and we do some sort of research mission. Then I wake up.

      During the entire dream I felt really curious and excited, and in the hospital part very disturbed, hence the title.
    11. Otherworldly computer chip adventure | [01.08.2020]

      by , 08-01-2020 at 04:29 PM (Draeger's Dream Journal and Documentation)
      Otherworldly computer chip adventure
      I am in Subnautica, and some option I accidentally selected transports me to the void, there might even have been a ghost leviathan already spawned. I panic and press another button and it sends me to the Aurora and again I panic since suddenly there's a reaper leviathan.

      Then, the scene changes to me and a younger version of a guy I know, Ethan, in some place I can't discern. I can only see that there's the eponymous computer chip and another object, possibly also computer related. I take the computer chip, and Ethan and I suddenly travel through a little tunnel in the chip to some more degenerated version of reality. I find out that it does just that, it's supposed to. I travel through it again and see a sort of weird sea creature from the perspective of the sky.

      Suddenly, I am in the living room of my waking home and open the cupboard of my father. The scene might have changed slightly so that the cupboard and I are standing in a cafe. In any case there was some sort of woman, maybe my mother, and if the cafe existed she was co-owner with me. I pulled the chip out of the cupboard and we travelled to a sort of grassy plains area. Now the purpose of the chip was simply to travel to another dimension and back. We walked around a bit, and not even ten seconds after that she suddenly found a large, beautiful diamond. We were very happy and returned. We suddenly then had lots of money to spend and did so. I don't remember how, though.

      I might have done something relating to chemistry.
    12. 7/30/2020 Yess more lucid dreams

      by , 07-30-2020 at 06:44 PM
      Last night I finally had two lucid dreams! I was following my normal routine according to my dream goals, and was starting to feel a little disappointed since I have been trying hard to have a lucid dream for 8 days now with no success. Every time I manage a DEILD I feel so much hope like I will be able to WILD now. Actually experiencing a transition helps me to know that it's possible!

      End of a long non lucid dream I don't care about remembering, but at the end of it I was trapped in a parking garage with a large grizzly momma bear. At first I saw a bear in the distance, and I was hoping it wouldn't notice me, then I look down at my feat and see a baby bear that looks friendly. But I know that momma bears are very aggressive about protecting their babies and a lot of attacks happen around these type of misunderstandings. Anyway I look back towards the mom and of course she has noticed me and thinks I have taken her baby and starts charging me. I was terrified, I have a dream phobia about being attacked by bears, and I remembered that being attacked by a bear is one of my dream signs and BOOM

      Right when I realize that being attacked by a bear is a dream sign I become low level lucid and a totally new dream forms around me with a pop. I am in an apartment complex like I lived in as a kid and am standing around the community pool. I do the usual lucid things noticing how beautiful it looks and all that then I remembered that I wanted to try to practice having waking life self-awareness and memory as well as try to emotionally experience a true non-dual perspective in a lucid dream. I was able to practice my self awareness and memory check like I do in waking life, and I felt like at the time I strongly knew it was a dream, and had some waking life self awareness. When I thought "this is all me, this dream all comes from me" I had like a brief flash of vividness, like everything in the dream pulsed with a color change briefly then went back to normal.

      Then as I was looking around I realized that there are no dream characters here, and I am all alone. I have a dream goal to talk to a "real" person in my dreams, and maybe meet a dream guide or find someone who wants to go on an adventure with me. So I start trying to call out "is there anyone who can answer my questions?" "Is there anyone who will talk to me?" and after asking two or three times I hear someone say "sure well talk with you" behind me and I spin around and the two girls from my last lucid dream are walking towards me! This is exciting for me because this is the first recurring lucid dream characters I have ever had! They are the same height, maybe 5'10, and I again have the impression that they are sisters. One of them has blond hair, pulled up in a pony tail, and is the one who does all the talking in this dream. The other sister has silky black hair, and always stands in my peripheral vision so I don't ever get a real good look at her.

      I am very excited that they are here so I hurry over to them feeling like rushed like I have a million questions to ask and I can already feel myself starting to wake up a little, I know its going to last a couple more minutes at best like my other DILDS because I catch lucidity as I am waking up.

      I ask the blond sister "How can I get lucid more often" and she smiles indulgently at me as this is the third time I have asked her this question. In my last lucid I asked her this question I remember feeling like her answer was revolutionary and brilliant while listening to it, but couldn't remember one word of what she said when I woke up, so I really paid attention this time. She said "The most important thing is to develop/have a lucid mindset... and more words I didn't understand she is continuing to speak but its over my head". Because I was really paying attention I can tell that I am not really understanding what she is saying anymore, so I interrupt her and ask "wait, what exactly does it mean to have a lucid mindset? What SHOULD I be focusing on? What emotions should I be feeling? HOW?"

      At this point the dream is starting to fade. She looks a at me a little exasperated that I interupted her, and then she looks over my shoulder and stops speaking and just kind of smiles at me in a kind way. This is something I am noticing that when my dreams are ending whoever I'm talking to looks over my shoulder and its like they see something that confirms to them I'm about to wake up, they usually just stop talking and give me that friendly maybe see you later smile. Then the dream ends

      I remember that I can try and DEILD. I focus on laying still as I wake up. I have some fear about forgeting my first lucid dream if I try to DEILD and it fails and I wake up in a non lucid so I briefly remember the previous dream as I focus on not moving.

      When I wake up, get back to my body, I still feel very sleepy and I feel like a DEILD will be successful, I feel like the dream is just below my bed and if I relax strongly enough I will just sink into it. So I just totally let go of my body, like totally limp bone, like if I was standing I would just turn into a puddle on the ground, and I get a strong falling feeling like I am sinking through my bed. I feel like I am falling into the dream beneath my bed, like it is a giant bubble, the surface of the bubble is a brilliant white light and as I sink through it it feels very peaceful and I totally cannot real my waking life body AT ALL at this point. I sink through the white light and BOOM

      I am back in the apartment complex of the last dream again. I think holy crap I did it, that was totally a WILD transition and I made it into a dream! I am in the office next to the pool area. I look out the window and see the two sisters are still here sitting in reclining pool chairs relaxing under an umbrella. I run out to them and they are excited to see me. I go up to the blond one who was talking before and she sits up in the chair goes cross legged and turns to face me ready to answer questions, I thought she looked very cute sitting like that and was happy that she was excited to see me, and willing to answer questions.

      I am lucid still at this point, but less strongly so. I forgot to do any stabilizing in this dream and didn't bring my waking awareness or memory with me as strongly as I thought. I didn't think to do any checking since I knew it was a WILD transition, but next time I'll know that even then my awareness needs a recharging in the dream. I know I wasn't as strongly lucid because this next conversation bit is fuzzier in my memory.

      I ask her "do you believe there are things in dreams that do not come from me" I don't remember her exact answer but I remember she looked like it was a subject that she didn't really want to talk about but she did say yes.

      At this point the dream was ending and I could feel myself waking up. I got close to her and I knew that I really wanted to remember her words this time, so I told her "crap I'm waking up, can you do a review in like five seconds please!"

      She nodded and said "first develop a lucid mindset, then well find out what your name means" I interrupt at this point and say "huh we didn't do that" she continues "then well do a tarot card reading" I interrupt again and say "we didn't do that either!" Then for the first time the other sister speaks, she is standing at my left shoulder "you are confusing him" I look toward her to see her face but before I do I notice she is pointing with her finger, and it felt like she was controlling my focus with her finger because I started to look where she was pointing, and it was like I could notice something that I couldn't before because she was helping me to focus. And I noticed that the first sister had a beanie on and across her forehead stitched on the beanie it said "Tarra" and the second sister said "see thats her name" and so I asked Tarra what her sisters name was and she said "she's Skippy" like the board game risk.
      No idea what that means.

      Updated 07-30-2020 at 08:19 PM by 61830

      lucid , memorable
    13. Dream - Drive Or Stay Home & Kairi's Light

      by , 07-26-2020 at 07:18 AM
      Date of Dream: SUN 26 JUL - 2020

      Dream No. 697 - Separated Sections

      Dream 697 A - Drive Or Stay Home

      I don’t remember much about this dream. From where I do remember, my family were planning on going to a holiday to Apollo Bay. My parents were discussing arrangements at the time such as who was going to drive there. It was supposedly going to be a long drive, so I suggested that I drive a portion of the way. I said to asked my mum if I could drive down the portion of the major road that was going to be straight, but my dad wasn’t having any of it.

      After I failed to get the message through to my dad, my mum tried explaining to him. He kept insisting though that I wasn’t allowed to drive and he said it in a mean and somewhat aggressive way. Though by now, I wanted my way and since my dad kept resisting, I snapped and said that I wasn’t going to go on the holiday with them at all and that I was going to stay home. The dream ended as I walked into the house to begin my home-stay and my parents and brother were getting ready to leave.

      Dream 697 B - Kairi's Light

      The dream started with me wondering around in my old house. A middle aged Asian lady approached me and brought my attention to some sort of video that Kairi had made to supposedly teach others about her light and its powers. As she suggested for me to watch it, I went over to the sitting room and sat on the couch as the lady set up the video and darkened the room. The rest of the dream was now a sub-scene, which was the actual video, the dream camera now actually immersing me in it rather than playing from the sitting room.

      The scene showed Kairi in The Final World and both Sora and Riku were also there with her; all in their KH3 appearances. Also, as the entire scene played, Kairi’s theme was running in the background. Kairi was saying something, insinuating that she used to have different powers but that she chose her current light powers for a reason. She then went to the group. Although they were standing equally apart from each other, it’s like the dream gave the illusion of Sora being in the middle and Riku was off to the side.

      And then the dream camera went to a close up of Sora, though I can’t exactly explain what he was doing persay, I think he ended up looking at me, studying me, but I’m not sure. But then the dream panned out again and that’s when Kairi was seen to close her eyes and then peacefully ascend somewhat, with when she was at the highest, she was glowing with all this light. When she descended again, she walked back over to the dream camera again to supposedly communicate with me. She did say more but I forgot what it was that she said. The dream ended after this.

      Dream 697 A
      Dream Guide: None
      Lucid?: No

      Dream 697 B
      Dream Guide: None
      Lucid?: No

      This is the second time I have successfully completed a task for a 'dream project' that I have set. I thought since Riku is my current dream guide, and he's from Kingdom Hearts which is a world that seems to have laws of its own, I thought I'd do something to give back to him for helping me pass all my university subjects as well as all the other times he's helped me in-dream. I thought that since the last KH game, Sora has gone missing; so the dream project that I have set is for me to incubate dreams where I may get fictional leads on Sora. The dreams form the 'assignment' component, and then in waking life, I'm going to write an imaginary report on my dream findings which forms the 'exam' component.

      For the assignment component, I set six compulsory tasks and one optional task to carry out in dream. The tasks are as follows:
      Task 1 - Have Riku take me to Shibuya so I can gauge the area that Sora has to survive in until IRL canon rescue via whatever game they make next.
      Task 2 - Conduct a supervised audit on Yozora. 'Supervised audit' meaning that Riku has to be accessible for assistance if Yozora gets bad in the dream.
      Task 3 - Get Riku's perspective on his connection with Sora.
      Task 4 - Pull Sora for a one-time 1-on-1 meeting with me so I can get his perspective on any matters.
      Task 5 - Explore the Destiny Islands to get some leads on Sora's homeworld or something about he himself. Riku can take me or I can go independently.
      Task 6 - Conduct an independent audit on Organisation XIII. 'Independent audit' meaning I don't need a dream guide in attendence.
      Task 7 (optional) - Get Kairi's perspective on her connection with Sora.

      Once again, Task 7 was optional, meaning I wasn't attempting to incubate it in real life, but could execute it if I stumbled upon it in a dream, which is what happened last night (this morning actually; the sun was up when I woke up and fell back asleep).

      So far I have completed Task 5 (Dream 693 C) and Task 7 (Dream 697 B). I still have 5 tasks (1, 2, 3, 4 and 6) to go before I write up the paper which I have given myself the imaginary rule of two days to write 'till it's due. The two days will be set once all 7 tasks have been completed.

      Lastly, although Riku was in the scene, I have not declared him as a dream guide here, because this felt like it was Kairi's spotlight and Riku was such an insignificant part of it, so much so that he didn't even shudder or speak.
      non-lucid , memorable , side notes
    14. Dream - Call Security & Royal Melbourne Lies & The Destiny Islands

      by , 07-25-2020 at 11:30 AM
      Date of Dream: WED 22 JUL - 2020

      Dream No. 693 - Separated Sections

      Dream 693 A - Call Security

      I don’t remember much about this dream. From where I do remember, I had come back from shopping for something at Dandenong Plaza. I was now at home and was somehow in my parents’ bed. I was going to get in to have a lie down with Riku (in his KH3 appearance). However, my dad got in between us and was being very annoying. There was a digital clock in the room with a weird set of numbers and every time that went off, my dad would harass me to wake up and would not let me have a moment with Riku.

      Eventually, I ended up calling out these various 5 or 6 digit numbers, making the threat to my dad that I was calling security. Every time I called out one of these numbers, he’d stop what he was doing and leave the room, but it wasn’t effective at all as he’d come back almost immediately. The dream morphed into us being in my bedroom and my dad was being annoying again. I remember this being the last ‘security’ number I called out. Also, Riku was partially distorted for this whole dream and just as Riku was finally about to ‘un-distort’, the dream forced a wake up on me.

      Dream No. 693 B - Royal Melbourne Lies

      I don’t remember how this dream started. From where I do remember, I was initially at the Royal Melbourne show with my mum, checking out all the various attractions. It was only a short while before one of the grounds staff members came and took her away as it were. Unbeknown to me, she was actually working at the show. I ended up speaking to Jasmine’s sister who was also working at the show but specifically with the horses. She said that if I came back at 11:00 AM, my mum would be done.

      The dream scene then shifted to me being in an actual part of the Melbourne CBD and I was wondering around until it was time for me to go back to the Royal Melbourne Show. However, I wasn’t even back yet and I realised that they were keeping my mum for longer than they had said; she was basically their workhorse now. I now had to make my way there in order to get my mum back. Not only was I cross at the officials for keeping her, but being on my own seemed to make me feel somewhat scared and insecure. I feel like I needed help and so while still in the CBD, I went to look for a dream guide.

      Just outside the train station, Riku ended up coming (in his KH3 appearance). I have entirely forgotten how he was summoned and how he came. Riku had a cool, casual, and fun temperament, but by his energy, I also knew he could tell that I was scared. The dream still had a while to go but Riku never let me out of his sight and always stuck close by for the rest of the dream, as if he was fulfilling the role of a mother.

      It then became the scene where I was due to take the train to get back to the showgrounds and only in this scene was Riku seemingly not present. Rather than an actual train, the dream seemed to make me fly low across these railway tracks myself, as if I was the train…? However, I saw all these brick walls and various obstacles within the train tunnels and this freaked me out. As I sped towards the obstacles, just as I was about to him them, I thought, ‘if I hit them I’ll die!’. The time came and I hit a brick wall with high speed but I was not affected AT ALL and rather the brick wall itself crumbled apart. I was now on the other side, continuing the show, I thought ‘how could this be?’, but then I remembered that although not visible, Riku was still with me and so he must have protected me and made me cause impact to the wall instead of the opposite way around.

      I got to the showgrounds and Riku was physically human again, now holding my hand and letting me take him wherever I wanted to go. It almost felt like I was now attending the show with the boyfriend I never had IRL. Riku was still able to ‘mother’ me and protect me while laughing at various things we ended up talking about as well as looked at the attractions I pointed him to. We came to a pavilion with all these carnival games and prizes, the most significant one I remember was the ball in the clowns’ mouth game.

      While we were there, I looked down and I seemed to have all these laminated cutouts neatly ordered in my hands. There were four of each of my dream guides; (from left to right) of Riku, 18-Volt, and Dreamy WB. Riku’s were of his default KH3 pose. 18-Volt’s hair was bizarrely ‘too black’ but his skin was ‘too pale’. Dreamy WB seemed to have her OCT 2016 school uniform appearance with the two braids. It felt as if these cutouts were a part of the carnival game prizes, like a ‘collectors edition’ as it were.

      I was then back to talking with the real Riku and making him laugh. After going to some more attractions on the fairgrounds with him having his arm around me, the dream ended.

      Dream No. 693 C - The Destiny Islands

      I don’t remember much about this dream. From where I do remember, I seemed to be at the Kingdom Hearts Destiny Islands myself. I didn’t necessarily spend too much time there. As I wondered from the coast with clear blue water and skies, I ended up seeing all this ‘dark, blue/purple’ crystal fissure-y stuff embedded into the cliffs. I decided to walk in the direction to see what it was about and as I kept walking, the rocks were all saturated with that crystal stuff, as if it were turning into the Realm of Darkness.

      However, I saw the other-side of the cliffs and made a realisation. I noticed I had ended up in a dry, barren, somewhat polluted dessert and came to the realisation that this was the wastelands from Jak 3. I remember that I had only walked in from the Destiny Islands though, so I this was not another dimension. I thought to myself ‘the sky is connected’. That’s all I can remember about this dream.

      Dream 693 A

      Dream Guide: Riku
      Lucid?: No

      Dream 693 B
      Dream Guide: Riku
      Lucid?: No

      Dream 693 C
      Dream Guide: None
      Lucid?: No
      non-lucid , memorable
    15. Dream - Training At Disney Castle

      by , 07-20-2020 at 03:02 PM
      Date of Dream: FRI 17 JUL - 2020

      Dream No. 689 - Training At Disney Castle

      The dream started with my at my house; the surroundings outside seeming like it was very early, like it was still night time but I could see. Back to what was going on in the house; my aunty had come over for a visit. Both my parents were at home but only my mum was seemingly around at the time. My aunty was talking to us about an opportunity she had for me as some sort of work experience, it had something to do with all these photos that were now all of sudden lying on the floor. I thought the project was a bit corny and so I didn’t like the idea of it. However, my mum got angry and in-fact, both my parents as a collective were angry (my aunty was just disappointed), so I realised I had to get out of there as fast as I could.

      I only had a little bit of a head-start to scramble out of the house once I then realised that my parents were chasing me! I rushed out the back door and then scampered around the house to try and get to the front. Though I realised though that if I exited through the streets, my parents would detect me and be likely to get me. So instead, I flew what felt freakishly high, and went over the roof, escaping from the back blocks of my group of houses. As I then went back down towards the streets and started walking again, I called for Dreamy WB but she didn’t respond. I then tried for 18-Volt, no response from him either but there was this energy suggesting that he was still angry with me. I thought I had run out of options, so although I couldn’t get help, I had to keep moving or my parents would catch up with me.

      However, as I started walking up the hill towards the milk-bar, I saw Riku casually walking on the other side of the road (in his KH3 appearance) that the milk-bar was on. I then remembered that Riku was my third option and so yelled out to him so he could hear me across the street. It took quite a lot of tries but he eventually noticed me, quickly turning his head sideways to see me and then he crossed the road to come to my side.

      Riku looked at me like he could tell I was anxious from my parents, so he came and hugged me. However, when he put his arms around me, both he and I ascended into the air and I realised he wanted to take me somewhere. For a while, it just seemed like he was transporting me casually within my area, but then he paused while in mid-air and told me to make sure I was holding onto him tightly. I realised that he wanted to fly me to Kingdom Hearts. So then I made sure I was holding onto him for dear life; my arms around his neck, my body pressed into his chest, and my head perched over one of Riku’s shoulders.

      However, Riku seemed to hesitate his next move, as if he noticed some sort of risk. He gently pushed my head off his shoulder and put it ‘behind his’ in regards to the direction we were supposed to be facing for this action to work. Once he made sure I was secure and ‘out of harms way’, he flew extremely fast with his head slightly backwards, however swinging it forward at the last minute in order to have enough impact to bash the sky open, forming an inter-dimensional hole. At first, the hole seemed to be nothing but ‘darkness’, but as he flew back and put me back into a normal position, we could actually see into the other world. It was at that point that I realised he not only wanted to take me to Kingdom Hearts, but ultimately to Disney Castle which was a sub-dimension of Kingdom Hearts, so he had to take me through yet another ‘rift’.

      Once Riku had taken me through all the necessary ‘holes’, I realised we were finally at the Disney world, but it didn’t look cartoony; rather it was quite a realistic setting. The grounds looked the setting in the Lord of The Rings / The Hobbit movies where they’d have the major battles; the grass was a very lush green, the field being wide and mountains being seen in the distance. As we were going across the field, I noticed Riku’s altitude getting lower and lower until eventually, he landed us right in front of Disney Castle (which did look like the actual Disney Castle but smaller) and released me.

      I realised that there was an event going on at Disney Castle in which Riku wanted to utilise to help train me for how I could deal with my parents. It was something called ‘Ninja Battles’, even though it had absolutely nothing to do with Ninjas. It was some sort of physical game but I cannot describe the specific actions. First it was just me and Riku and although we were battling each other, I didn’t mind as it was only for training and no one was actually going to hurt the other.

      I was stopped though with the realisation that my parents had found their way into this realm. I ran in a panic to see my mum walking down a now visible road in the distance while looking down at her phone (suspecting she was in contact with my dad). I ran back to Riku and was talking at him like at motormouth, asking him what on Earth I should do with the knowledge of my parents finding their way in. However, Riku’s calm response and unique perspective surprised me. He said that they may also have come here to improve themselves and to just leave them be.

      We were than able to get back into the ‘Ninja Battles' and I told Riku that although I was going up against him, I found it fun as I knew we were only training. He gave a slight smile and then we got back into it. However this time, others also seemed to join us and it was now between 6 people rather than just the 2 of us. The other 4 were random, unidentified Disney characters. After continuing to playfully feud for awhile, the dream ended and I woke up to an early time at dawn.

      Dream No. 689

      Dream Guide: Riku
      Lucid?: No
      non-lucid , memorable
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