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    1. Infinity nightmare and buying stuff in a store with school class | [27.07.2021]

      by , 07-27-2021 at 04:02 PM (Draeger's Dream Journal and Documentation)
      Infinity nightmare
      There's something with infinite dimensions. Something is infinitely backward in comparison to a lower integer, because of which I feel an unfathomable amount of fear.

      Later in the night, it continued, where apparently some number wasn't allowed to be reached, otherwise, it would wrap around to 16, which made me feel the same amount of fear.

      Buying stuff in a store with school class
      I am at a store. There, I buy something and apparently I am there with my mother, who is not happy because I am apparently supposed to be there with a school class.



      The first dream was a geometric night terror as a result of what seemed to be a fever. After I woke up, I was unable to notice that the ruleset of the dreams did not apply to real-life for a while.
    2. 7/24/21 - Kanye West and failed lucids

      by , 07-24-2021 at 04:28 PM
      Dream #1: Kanye West comes over to my cousin's house, which my family and I were at. It was pretty weird seeing him there because my family had absolutely no relationship with him whatsoever. I also noticed Kim Kardashian was there, I believe with one of their children. I also remember turning on a Nintendo Entertainment System, but my uncle didn't want me to turn it on, so before he noticed, my cousin quickly unplugged it.

      Dream #2: It was a scary dream and I was in a hallway in my house. I remember my mom doing a very creepy truth or dare smile in the dark, and when I'm dreaming I usually know I'm dreaming but can't take control -- but that changed tonight (kinda.) As I've been trying to lucid dream more, I guess my ability to take over a dream has improved, and I realized it was a dream, but everything started turning white so I tried to grab on to the wall because I read in a r/LucidDreaming post that it can help you stabilize your dream. It didn't work for me though.
    3. Kidnapping and Church?

      by , 06-23-2021 at 03:54 AM
      I had this dream last night. I don't remember everything. I was in a building which looked like the inside of my church. Except it wasn't. It was something much more important. I'm not sure what I was doing in the first half of the dream. But the 2nd half I was something like a security guard. In this half of the dream.. I saw some "bad-looking" people walking out with boxes past the "kitchen" . I was a bit suspicious so I followed them out (the outside at least this location also looked like my church) and I'm not sure excatly what the reason was but I was forced to get into a car of some man who looked to be the leader. For some reason once in the car they drived in such a werid way we ended up going up the hill past my house (which was werid) and the park oppistie. But dream ended after the man said something since I had to use bathroom
    4. Getting chased lucid | [12.06.2021

      by , 06-16-2021 at 03:06 PM (Draeger's Dream Journal and Documentation)
      Getting chased lucid
      I am with multiple people in a sort of changing room with many lockers. I do the nose plug RC and realize that I am dreaming. Since this dream is a nightmare, I am a bit worried, and try to get out of the situation first. I end up on a high mountain.



      I didn't have motivation to write down this dream for many days, which is why it's not really detailed.
    5. 14 Jun: Hit and run and consumed by remorse, UFOs among us and learn to program them

      by , 06-14-2021 at 03:34 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP


      I am a college student and I hit and run a man and left him bleeding to death on the road. My thought was that he was going to die anyway, before help arrived and so I rationalized that fleeing wouldn't ruin even more lives, namely mine and of those around me who would suffer immensely if I was convicted of manslaughter. So I decided to run away and pretend I had nothing to do with it and act normally. I was absolutely sure I could pull it off, even when the police appeared on campus and started investigating the students.
      I am heading to the library and the detectives are in the corridor talking to people and my paranoid mind believes a couple of them seem to be watching every movement I make and my facial expressions. I do get a bit nervous and I bump into a table and throw an ashtray to the ground, but I am already out of their sight. At the library I steal some chips from some kid who has a bag of chips open on his table. He doesn't even flinch. Wonder if that's because he is my friend or he just fears me. I go meet a friend at the most far back table and he is playing a computer game with cars and he is very proud that he managed to fit a car with a long hood into the back of a truck cabin and make a weird truck trailer, just to prove his smart and ability to bend the rules and codes of the game. I couldn't care less and cars actually trigger me at the moment, but I engage with his enthusiasm, to not raise suspicion. Later on I meet a group of friends, who are all very shocked with the events. One of the girls (looks my old friend Mara) says she would have no mercy for whomever the killer is. I feel very uncomfortable that I am the person and imagining if it is ever found out.
      We go for a walk outside the campus and we pass by the road where the accident happened, but they don't know that. There is no longer any sign of what happened, besides a patch of sand the authorities spread to soak up the blood. But my friends don't know, they have no idea where the accident happened, so "Mara" asks what is this for and I swiftly say probably to cover some oil spill. They look at me a bit strangely and I say I am just guessing. We arrive at some snack-bar / pub by the side of the road, where they like to go, and the cops and detectives are gathered there. This makes me anxious. There is also Master Harry, a Scott who is like the keeper of the campus. He spots us and invite us along. But my friends feel super interested in talking to the cops. The owner of this place is a surfer and has a long board decorating the place, above our heads and one of the detectives apparently also surfs so they engage in conversation regarding the long board. I am not interested.
      Then the older detective throws me a bate, by teasing me about a plant cared by the bar owner. I am not the least interested. He asks me stuff like if I can identify it, if I'd like to have one too and what I think about this guy managing to have one in this climate. And I am like "why should I care?". Then he shows me it is a pineapple and asks me if I shouldn't I be more enthusiastic about plants. I realize he already knows too much about me and my interests, which means I am a suspect. I do have a greenhouse that I care for meticulously at my parents house and I care a lot about plants, just not in this context with the stress I am feeling. I am seeing my life going down the drain. I don't know how they know, but they already suspect it was me, and are just trying to catch me. I think about my plants dying if I am arrested and I feel extremely sad for that, more than anything else.


      Back to previous dream. I am not caught yet, but I am going crazy with the guilt and duplicity. I have to deal with several people related to the victim and the feeling that I am keeping this secret from them and they would hate me if they knew the truth is consuming me. I am wishing to go to some island where nobody knows me and start a new life.
      I am staying at some pension of a lady who isn't particularly fond of me. She complains of something I supposedly did in the kitchen and asks me to clean it, but I am relieved to know it is just a silly thing I didn't even do. She has no clue that some other night I was drunk and peed in the kitchen. So I go look into the fridge and instead of cleaning whatever, I steal something, like some cheese and bread to make a sandwich. Then I hear her talking to her daughter, who just arrived from school and is complaining about something. Her mother says "well, you're not doing anything, because her mom is Carolina Herrera and nobody dares to upset that family at this moment, because of the terrible thing that happened to her dad."
      They are talking about the man I killed. I feel guilty again and run to my room. The room looks like my mom's office and there are tigers outside of the window trying to come in, so I rush to shut all the openings and lock the door.


      At my mom's house, It's night and I look outside. I spot a UFO, just a white light orb dancing around at distance. Then I spot another one, static and the first one moves towards the still one and then they both move away. During the day I spot one again in the sky. I start seeing them a lot. One day I spot one very small just hovering a street. I now am able to spot them all over the streets, spying on people, unaware of them. Only I seem to be able to see them. with the help of some friends, I capture one. It is the size of a basketball and it loses the ability to camouflage when offline. I show to my friends, who believed me but had never seen one themselves. I teach my friends how to spot them, and we can see them in the sky, in strategic places, positioned in geometric clusters. They form ice crystal like shapes with arms connecting them inside pentagonal areas. These bigger structures seem to be regulating the climate or other purposes. The little ones at the street level are watching us on a daily basis.

      Back to the dream. Me and my friends are now a rebel force meeting in secret and collecting data on these UFOs, trying to understand what they are here for. One day, I am on a bus ride with one of this friends and we spot one in the sky, after a long time not seeing them. We wondered if they found a new way to cloak or had simply disappeared. Then we see two jets flying on each side of the orb but at some point leaving and the orb staying fixed in a position. Me and friend point to it but no one else seems to see it. As I point to it, I feel like I am pushing a button and the orb opens up into a square of squares of different size, like a virtual keyboard. On top rows are bigger blue squares and bellow are smaller red squares. So I do what I did before and also pretend to click them as if they are buttons. I push a random combination of keys. The UFO/keyboard disappears and immediately strange things happen, like some cars on the road going bananas as if they lost their electronics, and going over the rails and crashing. We rush to meet with the others and tell them what happened. They are a bit incredulous, but I explain maybe all orbs are programmable but we need to crack the code and see which combinations do what. Then the girl who usually brings us food comes in looking scared. Says the building is surrounded and they threatened her. Everyone wonders how they found us and I say I actually told them and it is part of a bigger plan, but they think I am just crazy and are in shock that I did that. I seem to have a really intricate plan, but I wake up before finding out.

      Updated 06-14-2021 at 03:38 PM by 34880

      Categories
      non-lucid , nightmare
    6. Kinda traumatizing dance (?)

      by , 06-08-2021 at 10:15 AM
      With Adam F at the school dance with hot pink lights in pozen, bleachers on both sides, crowded with people at 2am. We're standing and swaying and he's looking at my sketchbook for some reason.
      "you can look at it with me if you want" he says. There's an unspoken sense of aggression.
      He lowers it down a foot for me, as if I'm really short.
      He says something and I respond by saying this is exhausting--the standing, constant shuffling, showing your work and the small talk--but then I hope he doesn't think I'm talking about him specifically. but I don't backtrack, and instead start putting extra effort into my body language to make up for the perceived slight.
      I think it's going well.
      He is commenting thoughtfully on the pieces and it seems like he might be into art.
      and then he points to something and turns the book towards me to show me, and brings his body really close to mine. I thought he had a girlfriend
      And looks down and the top of his head brushes mine and I look up and I can smell him and see the beads of sweat on his red hot face in the deep pink colored room
      And he comes back and forth in and out, swaying with me a bit aggressively
      and he never makes eye contact once while doing this. EVER. In a coy way.
      but he knows I am so turned on
      and he starts saying really douchey things while he towers over me and practically presses his chest into my face, and my knees are jelly and the smell of his cologne fills my nose and he starts saying really awful things
      and there's a page of my art with a female character, and he gets closer and starts spitting and drooling on what I made
      and it soaks the page enough to warp it and there is a thick webbed pattern of warm viscous saliva dripping from it into my hand now, and he smiles and stares directly into my eyes for the first time and tells me how he would love to blow a hot load all over her
      and I feel my face is white like I'm going to throw up
      and he walks away slowly and casually as if I wasn't there and slams the book shut in his hands, then drops it casually
      and it hits the floor heavy like the slam of a metal door and makes me jump and curls my lip, and I see the pages crumble in on themselves
      and my head feels dizzy and hollow, like it's floating away from my body and I don't want to try to move because I know I'll throw up
      but some short girl comes and takes my hand with her soft one
      another one asks if I want to call 911 but I say no no no but I'm glad someone else saw and asked, and the first girl leads me gently out of pozen into the warm hallway.
      I feel like I was traumatized but I don't know why that did it, maybe because I didn't expect it from him. Or the anxious bad part of me did, but he tricked the good side of me into giving him the benefit of the doubt and lowering my guard.

      I'm sitting down under an old dark wooden table in the pozen hallway looking at my crosslegged feet and someone else asks if I'm okay, and I look at the girl who helped me. She's under here with me
      She looks like Becca K, with a modest tan jacket on
      And for some reason she dissapears and I go back into pozen looking for her.
      Categories
      nightmare , non-lucid
    7. Freaky subway nightmare | [11.05.2021]

      by , 05-12-2021 at 02:58 AM (Draeger's Dream Journal and Documentation)
      Freaky subway nightmare
      I remember that the situation is like playing a video game again, although this time I feel like I am forced to play, despite my fear of seeing some gruesome image within it. Then I am in the game, physically, and it's regarded as real. There's something about being underground. There's something I don't remember, then I am in a sort of train with people, and I sort of have to save us by getting weird rubbery things on circular parts on a metal box that seems to be central to the function of the train. I notice nobody else is doing anything and that if we don't manage to do this, we will crash with full force into a sort of other chambers, which we are sort of falling into from the top, and to brake we have to get the rubber things on there. I also appear to be some female character relevant to the story, and she might have a name starting with A. I see that nobody else is trying to save us, so I animate them to help. But then, I struggle to do it, so we soon crash. But then suddenly, there's like a second try, so this time, the same things happen, except that this time, I manage to get most of the rubber things on. I think we will die again, but this time, the train brakes and stops in the chamber with no one hurt.



      This might not seem freaky, but there's some sort of deep fear associated with this gruesome image. There were some past dreams that were so horrible that I've supressed them, with a much stronger version of this fear associated with it that are still horrible to think about today. Not sure where this fear comes from, but I probably don't want to know, to be honest.
    8. A Horrid Hotel

      by , 05-09-2021 at 08:27 AM (The Internal and Subconscious World of DropTherapy)
      I had a dream where me and mom were still homeless. Despite that, one thing that stayed close to reality is that I worked at her job with her. We were having an argument in front of the car about openness when I said that I feel like I can never be open about my opinion about her or other things and she got really mad, and then I pointed out angrily that this always happens, after which I was kicked out of her car, felt obliged to leave and we screamed at each other as I walked away flipping her off from behind with both hands. Before she even left, a couple of old, decrepit heroin junkies with needles in their arm and an asian guy with a robot started asking favors of me that I didn't feel were ideal for me to do. They wouldn't back off until a few straight moments of convincing them to leave, but this one creepy overweight asian guy with a robot was following me for a bit longer, after which he deployed a module of his robot that rolled around on the ground, presumably to watch me.

      I ran to the other side of the hotel where my room was and closed the door, but before I could close it entirely, the little glass diode robot rolled in, after which I stomped it down and crushed it. The room was similar to the main two star hotel we stayed in for most of the duration of our irl homelessness, but instead of puke green like the door, the walls were white, and the main bed was in the corner of the room across from the TV, which was a nice flatscreen one that actually worked, on the right side of the door. Some time before she left, my mom said that whatever was on the TV was probably unsettling, and it sort of was. I saw a very personable grayish blue crash test dummy get dunked forcefully into water while it passively and contently accepted its fate, among other things. I switched the channel and came across a music video for a song by Primus about someone convincing their dad to let them use heroin, with the "I know I'll get through to him someday" line standing out to me the most. It sounded like something off their 2011 album Green Naugahyde. The whole time this was playing, I knew that the door to my hotel room was so broken that a little outward force could open it, but I didn't know what to do about it until I saw that it wasn't the main door. The main door was covering up the window and was much thicker. I closed that and after a bit of relaxation after an entire evening of tenseness, I woke up.
      Categories
      nightmare
    9. Insane!!!

      by , 04-27-2021 at 03:14 AM (MoSh's DJ: The Best Dream Journal in The Universe.)
      Jamie

      Jamie seemed upset about something. that's all I can recall. Miss the longer dreams about her...


      Death

      A long dream but I only remember sectioned. An old co worker named K and I were in a town that looked like chilliwack. He was coercing me to help him kill people. We had to cut people up into tiny piece so we would stash them in baggies and them bury them in a park. I didn't enjoy this. I was terrified of doing this and wanted to get away from him. Later I was by chilliwack mountain and saw a youtuber moe sargi who i never watch anymore. I kept asking him about his videos and he told me they are all fake... I already knew that.


      Some other dream i recall about Saad doing drywall like my dad. He seemed pissed at me.
    10. Pouring rain and weed bags

      by , 04-22-2021 at 05:54 PM
      the dream start i was laying down in the streets and some heavy rain starts pouring i get up and see a guy in a black leather jacket and red pants he ask me do i play games i try to answer then he reaches in his pocket then pulls out a bag of weed i reach and try to grab it and jolting lighting pulse hit me when i touch the weed bag i try to stay lucid but i was losing awareness and i fell out the dream right when the pulse of lighting hit it was awesome who remember getting that jolt!!
    11. March 23, 2021

      by , 03-23-2021 at 05:50 PM
      I was attempting a WILD - didn't work but I did fall asleep luckily


      First dream I had I was living in a mansion, just a bigger 3D version of my bedroom with a private bathroom.
      Kinda like a Sims type of house.
      My parents were also living there for some reason.

      I had to pee but was constantly interrupted by my parents whenever I wanted to go to the bathroom.

      I woke up, actually needing to go to the bathroom so it was a good thing I didn't go in my dream.

      Second dream I had was short.

      I in my living room staring at the floor, when a shadow appeared screaming "Hey!"

      That jumpscare woke me up immediately lol, wasn't sure whether I was still dreaming or not so I slept with my head in the pillow as I didn't want to see some other "surprise shadow" behind my curtains hahahaha

      Can't recall the third dream I shortly had before class started.
    12. 20 Mar: Rescuing cats, parasites and toxic bugs, superman alter-egos

      by , 03-20-2021 at 11:42 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      At a house which appears to be Carla's home. There's my mom and my grandpa along with a bunch other people, as if they all live together there. There is an earthquake and I suggest we get out while it is happening, but my mom points out that grandpa can't get up and walk on his own. So while we're doing our best to lift him, the earthquake stops. People feel like it is ok to stay, but I go check the house and some rooms look dangerously affected, with awful cracks on walls and ceiling. I insist on evacuating everybody and I manage to grab my grandpa on my own over my shoulder and take him away, but then mom and a friend remind me about all the cats that live there and especially like to gather on the rooms that are most damaged. I tell them I will get them all to safety, and I start grabbing them two at a time and putting them in improvised boxes and containers to a safer area of the building, and closing these rooms shut. But there seem to be more and more cats popping up. At some point the corner room that was more damaged, is really coĺapsing and the cats are just there hanging out like totally oblivious of the danger upon them.

      At some modern house with glass walls and straight lines over a grassy hill. There is a bunch of kids that come over for activities and I am somewhat responsible for them. We are playing with a radio broadcaster or similar and I am thirsty so I go drink a glass of water. It tastes horribly and I notice it is orange like it has rust in it. I go check our water source, some kind of well, and it is poisoned by two kinds of dead processionary caterpillars, one of them which is orange and black and I've never seen before. Doesn't seem very safe. Meanwhile I spot a bunch of them on the ground and before the kids or dogs touch them, I rush to pick them all and put them on a bucket. But on doing so, I grab some soil that is infested with different bugs and worms and there are some thin long ones that I think are baby earthworms, until one gets between my fingers and finds a way through my skin. It is so thin and slimy I can't get a hold of it and it enters inside my hand. I can feel it moving and it is exasperating and painful. I go to the doctor immediately and she gives me really grim news saying I just drunk water with a deadly toxin and have inside me the worst parasite that grows the larger of all. She says I have also been bitten twice by a black widow and I'm like "when was that, because I didn't complain about any of that?". She starts me on treatment but says the prospects aren't the best. I cry like a baby and say I'll never again even step outside the safety of a city.

      Me and Riverstone run a little shop with everything from new and used clothes to a books and antiques and we also have a few boxes with stuff for free that people can just take. Some lady is interested in used baby clothes as she can't afford brand new clothes and I am having difficulty in finding it in the middle of the mess the shop is in at the moment. She asks if some stuff she likes can be taken for free and Riverstone says yes, because he is overwhelmed by the excess stock we have, but I think it is very sellable stuff so I say no to her. Meanwhile the lady is waiting regarding the baby clothing and I tell her to come back the next day and I'll have the stuff she wants. That's when I notice she is a little person.
      Then I see some other customer sitting on a stone slab outside where some slug like creatures are sneaking behind him and because of my previous dream with worms, I panic and warn him about it. Still, one of them hooks itself on his back, like a leech. Fortunately we manage to unhook it. Then some stupid ass idiot comes by with a bunch of these worms in a jar, throws them at me and runs away. Everybody freaks out and helps me shake them out of my hair and check if any has latched on my body, but we think I am in the clear.
      I then get possessed and chase that mf down. Turns out it was a girl, she teases me like "so what? what will you do?" and I go full "Kali Ma" on her (Indiana Jones ref) and plunge my hands in her chest ripping her organs out and then to finalize it, I intend to project flames from my mouth, like a dragon, but instead I project hot green vomit on her, like the possessed girl in the Exorcist.
      When things calm down a bit, I sit with Zilla, Vera and a couple other friends at some outdoor café to drink something and relax. There are familiar faces around from my school past. I hear some music that makes me smile. And Vera interprets that I am smiling because I saw a guy on the next table, she assumes I have a crush on. So she takes a photo of him with her cellphone and goes around telling everyone he is my crush. He actually is a guy who bullied me a lot in middle school, his nickname was "ass-bomb" because he once farted in the classroom or something.
      I am fully aware now and tired of silly games so I explain to her what I was smiling at and whom the guy is and decide to go for a walk and do something with my lucidity. The area is like a kasbah, very tight streets with earth-rammed houses and vendors' tents. I soak in the diversity while thinking what to do. I see a few more familiar faces from middle school, another couple bullies for whom I actually feel tenderness, not so much from what they did but just to see them as they were back then, kids who haven't aged. I find it precious that I still keep their faces stored in my memory. Then something odd happens.
      Superman falls from the sky onto some iron structure like the entrance to a train station or something. He seems to struggle to get on his feet, then he is attacked by what seems another superman who looks more like a super butch superwoman, way more muscular than the original, but with a female face. And she beats the shit out of him. Then comes an emo superman, very pale and skinny and scared. He doesn't really do anything, just watches, confused, I am also confused. I decide to fly up where they are, to watch it better and maybe help the real superman, I don't know. But they kinda stop fighting and look at me surprised, like "and who the hell are you?". I feel like they now might pick a fight with me, so I just let go and fly away and let them sort it out.

      I keep flying but now I am actually on a plane over Florida. Instead of landing in the airport, it lands on water but not as an accident, apparently it is an hydroplane. The sky is so bright blue, no clouds, sun is shining bright, wonderful weather and beautiful light. When we land on the water, people are then taken to some water taxis and escorted by jet skis who are there as a backup (they have rafts for taking in people if necessary). I find it a bit too much of a precaution, but I am impressed with the organization. Some kid is looking at me and I smile at him. Most people are families with kids and I feel they are going to Disney World.

      Updated 03-20-2021 at 11:50 AM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , nightmare
    13. 16 Mar: Gore nightmares of genocide and demonic possession

      by , 03-16-2021 at 09:05 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      At some African small village. Some white man is rounding up black and white children to burn them alive. Nobody stops him, as if afraid of the consequences and I don't get it, because all I see is one man. When he lights the fire, I scream in horror and decide it's worth risking my life to fight for the children. I first throw rocks at the guy and hit him in the head. He falls on the ground and I beat the shit out of him, break his arm and try to strangle him. I am really possessed and ripping the guy apart. The villagers use the chance to put out the fire and save the kids. A black female police arrives and asks me to stop beating the guy, so she can take him into custody. Then I am lauded as an hero and invited to some big music event. The band playing sounds a bit like AC/DC. There is then an after party and I come with Riverstone. Someone complains he wasn't invited and I yell at them that he is the reason I am still alive (don't know why).

      At my teenage room at my mom's house, but different, because it is on ground level. Some dude breaks in my window and I think he wants kill me, but then he just grooms me and seduces me and I feel like he wants to abuse me. Riverstone is in the house somewhere and the guy is alerted by the noises of his presence, so I use the opportunity to claim my boyfriend is coming. The guy gives up his intents and prepares to leave, but lets me know that he will return. So I lock and glue the windows shut. (So Riverstone did save me, but in a future dream. Odd.)
      The stalked does not come back to my house, instead he causes a fake fire at my high school, to make everyone come out and then kinda kidnaps me. When he does so, I detach from my own body and see myself as a young blonde teen girl. He says something to her ears and she is bewitched. Next time he comes, she actually is longing for him and she kisses him in front of the school colleagues. Since he is an older man in his 30s, all kids and teachers present react in shock and she looks at them like she couldn't care less and finds them all pitiful. Later she is with teachers and colleagues at a workshop where they have some practical crafting lessons. The creepy guy is there too, at first just like a ghost. He possesses or hypnotizes a teacher that throws himself at a rotating saw, cutting himself in half and splashing blood and guts everywhere. Everyone is horrified and then the guy materializes, looking devilish. Now is obvious to me that he is a demon. He grabs the dead teacher's heart and gives it to the girl for her to eat it. She somehow is now fully naked and covered in blood and everyone else runs away. But I confront him. I want to stop him. And now he wants to kill me. He traps me in some kind of mental maze, the space around me transforms so that I can't get out of it. One room leads to an identical one and he is always there. There is no escaping. At first he just taunts me and I get a knife and slit his throat every time I see him, but he just appears in the next room and the next. Then I try to kill one of his manifestations by stabbing him repeatedly and slitting his throat while repeating like a mantra "in the name of the father, the son and the holy spirit". I don't know why, because I am a buddhist. He seems to lose some strength and not be able to fight back. Then I kill another one and chop him into pieces and stab and slice each organ including the heart and as a result it opens an horizontal slit on a wall, to escape this place and go back to the "real world". I repeat the prayer even more intensely and feel like I conjure the Holy Spirit as a gush of wind comes through the slit and pushes through the space behind me, as if to blow the demon away from me. Once outside, there is a stairway and as I climb it, I also get the power to multiply into endless manifestations, so I am ready to face the demon if he comes after me. Strangely enough, those manifestations are all dressed up as the Daredevil or some kind of Power Ranger type of suit in dark red and blue tones.
    14. Car dream where mom was really controlling and snippy

      by , 02-04-2021 at 05:10 AM
      I had the car dream set at granddads house again last night for the second night in a row. Like the dream I had the night before, it was really physically and emotionally uncomfortable. In the dream last night, mom was also really snippy and controlling.

      When mom told me to go ahead and get in granddads car and buckle to the front middle seat, as soon as I tried to argue about sitting in the middle and getting in the car before she was ready to go she snapped at me and told me that I could either get in the car and buckle in the middle of the front seat or I would be grounded.

      When mom finally got in the car and was trying to get it started after my sister and I had to wait for her for what felt like forever, she kept getting in my face and telling me that I needed to calm down. I never even said anything to her before she started telling me to calm down.

      When she discovered I stepped in dog poop, she screamed at me about not watching where I was stepping and not checking my shoe when I noticed the car stunk. She told me to give her my shoe so she could clean it and for me to stay buckled in my seat.

      After the battery went dead after she got back in, as I was asking if I could get out she snapped at me again and told me that me and my sister needed to stay in the car. I woke-up from the dream while she was looking for a jump start.

      Not sure why she was so snippy and controlling in this dream, but it made me fell even more uncomfortable.
    15. Another night with the new car dream

      by , 01-26-2021 at 04:40 AM
      I had the car dream that I have started having again last night. The things I remember most from last nights dream were arguing with mom when she told me to go get in the car and when the car had the dead battery.

      When mom told me to get in the car and buckle-up in the middle, I first tried to argue about sitting in the middle trying to explain to mom that my sister could handle the middle better than me since she was younger/shorter/smaller than me but mom snapped at me that is was my sisters day to choose her seat today and that I got to have the font seat in her car yesterday and would get to choose my seat again tomorrow. When I then tried to explain that it would be really embarrassing for me to have to ride between them she told me that was the craziest thing she had ever heard and that she was sure no-one would noticed how we were seated.

      I then tried to talk mom into letting me and my sister go to the park that was a few blocks away rather than waiting in the car for her. I tried to convince her that this would be a better idea and that she could just come to the park and pick us up whenever she was done at granddads. She told me that she didn't think this was a good idea because she wasn't sure how much longer before she would be done and that the park was not on our way home. I kept trying to convince her to let us go to the park until she finally got tired of hearing it and got in my face and reminded me that she was in charge and that I was to get in granddads car and buckle-up in the middle seat now. She said she couldn't understand why I was making such a big deal about riding in the middle and waiting in the car, but that I needed to get a better attitude. I then went out and got in the car.

      While waiting with my sister, I remember she kept wanting for us to talk about granddad and share our feelings about him being sick and in the nursing home. I kept trying to get her to talk about something else, but this was all she wanted to talk about and the kept brining it up again whenever I tried to change the subject and kept trying to get me to share my feelings which I did not want to do.

      Once mom finally got in the car, I remember she was really snippy when she discovered the car had cut off when she tried to put it in gear. When I tried to keep telling her I thought the car was in drive and needed to be put in park in order for it to start, she would snap at me and get in my face and tell me to calm down, that she was doing the best she could. I kept trying to tell her this is why nothing was happening when she turned the key, but this just made her more frustrated and she ignored what I was trying to tell her.

      When the battery went dead after mom discovered the car was out of gear and tried to start it once she put it in park. I kept trying to talk her into letting me and my sister get out of the car while she looked for a jump start. I woke-up from this dream while mom was in my face telling me that she was in charge and that me and my sister were to stay buckled-up in the car. She was making it clear that I would not like what would happen if I did not do what she wanted me to do.

      In this dream, I really felt a lack of control as no matter what I tried to suggest or ask for I was stuck buckled to the middle of the front seat of granddads car.
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