ZenLD

5-6 AP.i slept in 90 min intervals. 1,3,4th were naturally 90min, I was worried I might oversleep on 2nd cycle so I did set an alarm for it. Overall 90 minutes were natural to me. I watched some Japanese videos regarding LD, since the japanese term for it randomly came up, it was a sign. I watched several videos and LD is not very popular in japan. However there were some naturals who didn't follow the conventional techniques and I got some cool perspectives regarding it.I also held a rubix cube as I went to sleep. Slept diagonally without pillow on 3rd sleep. I also read RR novels from different genre than usual to get more visualization training.

So there were 5-6 ap in on the 4th sleep cycle.

1. I felt the "feeling", had some vibrations, I focused on it but had doubt whether it would work. Failed likely due to belief. Went back to sleep.

-need confidence

2. Felt it again, this time I visualized with eyes closed. I had memory for one of the japanese LD video I saw.

It was a scary one where a guy got followed around by a ghost girl like the one from the ring. He exited his dream but kept having FA with her following him. I had the memory of that in the back of my mind.

I had some fear and it intensified as I focused on the vibrations. It's the fear of sleep paralysis feeling. But I know I could overcome it. I had DETERMINATION. I told myself I was EXCITED, that I only had to leave the room for a cool experience. So I was up and about, saw the blurred vision of the bedroom. Rubbed hands to stabilize. I tried to jump through the window behind me that was beside the bed. I failed (this part might seperate into 2 AP)

I tried again, I was repelled the first time but I knew I had to really want it. I stopped caring whether I would break the non-physical glass. I went with all my might and I broke through.

I was out in the backyard. It was like the usual backyard. But it was snowing. It was somewhat warm though. I rubbed hands to stablize. I began to recall an action I wanted to incubate prior to sleep. I wanted to meditate in my dream again.

I quickly entered the meditative state and sat down. It was very serene. Time began to slow down. Each petal of snowflakes gently floated down ever so slowly. Time was dilated. It was beautiful. I decided to stand up maybe explore. I just watched the slowness of my surroundings and just being in awe.

-Determination won out. Meditation is still awesome.

3.I was back on bed, I thought it was over but I had felt something. A feeling I could do more. I stayed still. Soon I was back in. I juump through the window behind me again. I was diving in forward with a spiraling motion clockwise to give it an extra oomph to break through the window. I broke through.

It was a breathtaking serene garden. The air was gentle and moist, clean. There were water running in mini stone waterways/canals about 1m tall, perhaps 1ft wide, that ran through the whole place. throughout the garden that gave it that dampness in the air. The stones were grey/black from age and the wetness likely making fungi grow. I could sense the stones were shadow of brilliant bright white shine that would have lit the whole garden alight upon initial construction. The dimness of what was left now was peaceful in its own way however. It also had small square stone ponds that had loctus. With plenty but not a overbearing amount of lush greens that gave it a pleasant scent. It was like a garden of the emperor in the dynasty days. It was pleasant.

I looked to the right and I saw a middle aged, maybe 50-60 years old asian woman, with black hair pumpy face. We exchanged a few glances. I walked past her afer a bit. I walked past her and saw 2 old Chinese men there.

Could just be influenced by movies.

4.I was back in bed. This time I decide to head through the bedroom door that was to the front and to the right. I Acted immediately. I went through the door and through the hallway towards the doro to the back. After I went through I was back into the garden from the previous dream.

To my right near where the old woman was before, I saw a little child that perhaps reminded me of me. I gently pinch the child's cheeks, they were too marshmallowy ok!

I walked towards to the right as I did previously and I just decided to meditate. I closed my eyes. But I could still see through my eyelids. A little more blurry than before though. I saw I think an old man and two young women, that looked very wise and and beautiful respectively. I decided that I could maintain my meditative state and do walking meditation as I approached them. As I am approaching them, I rub my hands against each other then touch the stone waterway to immerse my senses there. I keep approaching them. They were expecting me.

Ancestors?

5. I am back in bed. I hear my parents argueing. I realize the sounds were not real. They keep argueing though. There is a happy tune playingi n the background, spongebob-esque cheerfulness. I try to jump through the window to the left side but I fail.

6. I am back on bed again. Still hearing bit of arguments. Not interested. I aim to jump through the same window. Spinning-dive. I did it! But as I break through the scattering shards of glass, the argument also reaches its climax. My mother yells "I'm leaving!" I think this unstablizes my emotions and awakens me finally. The happy tunes were strong and clearer than before though!

-In the back of my head I also wanted to wake, to write it all down, could be the primary cause of things ending here

-perhaps this was a repressed childhood memory or something

xx
few failed LD after this


Notes

Meditation in dream is awesome

90 minute sleep cycles are very good for me.

I think I'm lacking rem, will probably rebound with more dreams tomorrow.

I had the tingling on my third eye wake me during the xx last few failed ones. I just awoke before i could do much each time. I think the best thing to do during these times is to
SWITCH TO A MORE COMFORTABLE POSITION, LAY ON SIDES.
that worked before and gave me long LDs.

New MILD mantra.

Holding rubicks cube in hand

Practice 3rd person, visualization, reflection, act out

+Next time I will conquer the inception dreams.

Master the "feeling" induce it whenever.

cycles:
90
90 (+alarm afraid of ovesleeping)
90+(connected to next, awake short, 2 min?) 2:20(total)



Always know that I'm dreaming.