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Locaiton: A Diner



I was already lucid, walking down an alley way on the side of a diner. I entered the building from the side door to an old 50s diner with the shiny chrome bar and tables. I noticed some people standing at opposite sides of the room with paintball guns in their hands. They were staring at each other as if it was a stand off in the old west. There were four peopl on the left side and six people on ther right side. I noticed a few of my friends in the group. They drew their guns and starting shooting. Once one of the people got shot, they disappeared from sight

After th confusion had ended, there were two people left on the left side, an all six people were still there on the right side. The people on the left aimed at me but decided not to shoot. Somebody form the right side asked me if I wanted to sit down, but i said no, and they all sat down at this little table that was only supposed to sit 2 people. One of my friends fired at me and caught me offguard, and hit me right in my chest. However, without knowing it, I reversed time back to right as he shot it and caught the paintball in mid-air by stopping time, something I had never done before but found very cool

A couple of my friends were staring like, "wow, damn he's fast," which was when I noticed one of the kids who went to my school, but i was not very fond of. He was turned around for some reason and I couldn't tell if he was talking to somebody or not. I threw the paintball at his head and hit him right in the back of it. While I was throwing it, my friend who had caght me offguard had shot me twice, once in the chest and once right under my left eye. Ouch. It didn't hurt at all though, just felt like somebody had poked my in my cheek.

Then, another one of my friends started laughing at me for some reason. I asked him what's so funny, and he said, "Hehe, Ricky, you got a cut right below your eye. I touch where the paintball had hit me and, sure enough, there was some blood there. Right as I noticed the blood I either lost lucidity or woke up.

(There was more before and possibly after I became lucid but I could not remember it no matter how hard I tried)

I find myself flying through a dreamscape, that is very vivid and yet closer to hypnagogia than an actual dream. I see gorgeous places and I start thinking how to paint them in my mind, because at this point I know that I'm not awake, and honestly I don't know exactly where I was. Somewhere between dreaming and awake I suppose. In this place I can paint beautiful things. Everything and anything that I think suddenly manifests, I am in control of what I am seeing. Like I am conducting and controlling the hypnagogia somehow. Each image I see is so incredible, that I take a moment to memorize it, and observe it's finest details. It has an infinite resolution. I know in my heart that I can paint such things as I see them in my mind, and I become sad that I can not so clearly see...truly see...when I am awake. I test myself. I imagine a group of people and I pose them in different ways and observe them at extreme angles as if I were below them looking up, or above them looking down. The perspective is all perfect, and I tell myself that I need to remember this when I wake up. How to see...while awake. How to tap into this place of pure inspiration. Either my own subconscious or the whole of the collective consciousness. Perhaps this is akashia. I examine every detail and notice things I never noticed before, like the structure of the big toe, and how the heel looks when viewed from a certain angle. Then I go on to imagine the most beautiful scenes I can think of. I don't even have to try, I just think, "imagine something beautiful" and it happens, and what I see is so stunning that it would bring me to tears. Not only because of it's beauty but also because I know that I could never create anything so masterful, so absolutely divine. I am the tortured artist, blessed with visions of beauty beyond measure and compare, yet without the skill to be able to recreate such visions on paper or canvas. The frustration of knowing that these things are here...in my head...inside me...and yet I cannot see them while awake. I cannot use them to help me to create. Instead all I have are vague impressions, outlines, misconceptions about form and shape. True testament to how I live my life.

Oh nameless disembodied spirit of hate and rage. Does this demon exist within me? What is this entity that terrifies and tortures me so. Formless. Shapeless. There are no words that can describe such a thing. Is this what evil means? Something born into this world out of rage and hatred, which exists only as a shapeless shadow, blacker than any black existing in the realm of reality. Something from which no light returns...a black hole. Sucking you in...devouring...your soul. Can such a thing truly exist within me?

Recently I have been having recurring dreams about my old house, and more importantly, my old bedroom which, in these dreams, is violently haunted. These dreams have been getting worse, I have absolutely no idea what is causing them, but I have never felt terror like this before. Even in my worst nightmares. I have never encountered something so purely evil and unable to escape from, even when lucid.

I lived in this house from the age of thirteen, up until we moved about 5 years ago. I had been dreaming that my old bedroom was haunted for awhile, but only recently have the dreams turned into full fledge nightmares. The following are three (out of many) such nightmares I have had recently involving this haunted room.

My bedroom was empty, everything had been placed into the moving truck, and I go back down to my bedroom to get the last few things. I walk to my bedroom, which is in the basement, and just as I get to the open door...it slams shut in my face with such an intense force that I stumble backwards. I think to myself, that it is haunted, and that there is something very evil in there. But I need to get my stuff, and I don't want to be afraid. I think it is best to master my fear and enter the bedroom. When I go in, it is completely empty, just bare wood floors. I get to the center of the room and the bedroom door slams shut behind me. It is so loud that I am already very terrified because I know that something is very angry. I turn around to look towards the door and I see a shadowy blackness...immediately I am filled with terror. I can sense that this thing is pure evil. It screams...the loudest...most horrifying demonic moan and I make a run for the door. I am knocked down by some invisible force, the shadow still shrieking in my ear and echoing so loudly through the empty room. The closet doors are slamming closed over and over, the windows shatter, the ceiling fan is rocking about wildly above my head. I start screaming. I tell myself it's just a dream, and that I can't be here, because I have a new bedroom now. So I desperately try to think about my new bedroom, so that I can wake up from this nightmare. But I cannot remember where I am sleeping. I am semi-lucid throughout this whole experience, but I am unable to fight this evilness and terror that I am filled with. I eventually make it to the door but it won't open. I keep trying and eventually I get out and slam the door behind me. It stays shut and I run for my life.

I am in my old bedroom alone. It's empty. I know that I couldn't be there and become lucid. But despite the lucidity I am not overjoyed, and surprised to find myself in that bedroom. I feel the darkness closing in around me. "No." I say to myself, and try to will it to go away. But it persists. This is not a thing I have any amount of control over. I try to think of different ways to expel the evil from this room, but I am suddenly being pulled towards it, as if by a rope coming out of my stomach. There is a tugging sensation and I cannot fight it...it is not physical...it is spiritual. I feel myself separate from my body and float into the blackness. I am completely overcome with the darkness and feel myself become filled with that same rage, that evilness, that hate...and everything goes black. I wake up crying.

In my dream last night I found myself in my old house, in the basement, which is a common place for me to be in dreams. I walk over to my bedroom, completely forgetting that I had sworn never ever to go back there. Forgetting that it was inhabited by the most evil demonic spirit hell bent on torturing me. I open the door and immediately it slams back shut, but it slams on my fingers. Four fingers of my right hand are caught in the door. It all comes flooding back to me, the evilness that exists in there. I become terrified. I'm pulling my hand as hard as I can but I can't get it out. The door won't budge. It's only a matter of time before the evilness opens the door and sucks me in, and then I will be trapped in there again with it. I am absolutely panicked. I consider cutting my hand off, but I don't have a knife. I pull so hard that my fingers start to rip off. The door opens and I fall backwards. Hovering in the doorway is the darkness. I get up and run as fast as I can. But the evil pulls at me like a magnet. It pulls at my spirit, my soul. I feel myself start to get disconnected from my body...because my body continues to run away. I focus on staying inside myself, and get up the stairs. I find a bottle of holy water and spray it everywhere. I dump it out forming a circle around me. My little dog is near my feet. I grab him and toss him into the empty bedroom beside me, hoping to keep him safe. Then I see...something...crawling it's way to the top of the stairs. She looks like the little girl from the Exorcist. I knew this wasn't the evilness, it was just something that manifested out of it. Like a side effect. This girl did not frighten me even though she looked very scary. But after that evil, it would take much more to frighten me. She tries to attack me but I grab her and shake her and I shout things that I cannot remember. Like, "look what you've done. Look what you've become. Now everyone can see the real you. Now you look on the outside how you are in the inside." I don't know what I was yelling or why. Then I threw her from me and she crumpled into a heap and took on the appearance of an angler fish. Demonic eyes and huge sharp teeth, amidst a black mass of clothing and tangled hair. It looked dead. I knew the evil was still in the house, in my room, so I left the house.

[I]This is a paper I wrote for my English class. Read the Poem, "America" by Tony Hoagland.[/I]

English 100
Dr. Mark Lawhorn
Poem Analysis: “America” by Tony Hoagland
In the poem, “America” by Tony Hoagland, the poet tells a story of an experience while teaching a class in the modern day United States. A student compares America to a prison. The poet in annoyed with the young man who presumably comes from middle class Suburbia. In the middle of the conversation, the poet recalls a dream about stabbing his father. The poet compares modern America to a nightmare of floating in a pleasure boat down a river full of drowning people.
Overarching themes throughout the poem are consumerism, capitalism, and greed. The poem describe the poet’s journey as he goes through a mental and implied spiritual metamorphosis firstly getting annoyed with his student, wanting to tell him “how full of shit” he is, then recalling his dream, then recalling a quote by Karl Marx, “I was listening to cries of the past when I should have been listening to cries of the future,” and lastly empathizing with the student while imagining the metaphorical nightmare.
Another main grouping of themes is dreams, nightmares, waking life, dream life, sleeping, and lucidity, specifically, being aware that one is dreaming. The people in the drowning in the river could be compared to the laborers in foreign countries manufacturing goods for America while living in squalor, or Americans unhappy because of misguided values. The “you” in the pleasure boat is The American, or America itself, or the ideal of consumerism. In the poet’s dream, money is clogging up the father’s heart. The poet is actually helping his father by stabbing him. In the dream poem, the father thanks his son, and says, “And so I perish happily, freed from that which kept me from my liberty.” So, again, we have the theme of captivity. The subtle metaphor of America is money comes to the forefront. The poem in the dream becomes a dream sign, something in a dream which makes the dreamer realize he is dreaming, and the poet becomes lucid, which is similar to waking up in a dream. The poet thinks, “I am asleep in America too, and I don’t know how to wake myself either.”
Themes are paired with contrasting themes: older generation and younger, teacher and student, nightmares and dreams, communism and capitalism, anger and compassion, the material world, and the world of dreams. The young student bemoans the modern American consumer based value system, and as the teacher questions himself and learns, the student becomes the teacher. Marx’s quote “near the end of his life” implies Marx retrospectively thought communism was less than ideal. But, the poet wonders if capitalism is really so freeing as he questions if Marx would have imagined the modern American nightmare if Marx had been “listening to cries of the future.”
In the last stanza the poet speaks of you turning the volume higher in the nightmare. This is obviously a reference to television or listening to a radio. The sound could either be you drowning out the cries of the future, the implied screams of the people dying in the river, or the screams of third world laborers themselves, as if we somehow take a perverse pleasure in the pain of others by passively purchasing goods which we know are manufactured by those suffering in poverty, and in doing so are exhibiting a kind of complacent sadism. “America” is a complex poem, with thought provoking ideas, and interesting themes cleverly threaded through the fabric of the piece.

During most of the night, I had terrible recall. Only 2 dreams remembered by 6:30. I can very rarely get back to sleep once light starts showing through my window, even IF I put my sleep mask on, but this time I was lucky.

1- Midnight Tragedy
A wolf... wandering through the forest. "Pain is pain, but one step out of Hell is alleviating. The wolf's war had never been closer." He grants a big dog sentience to ask it a question, just after the poor thing gets chopped in half. It is still alive, writhing in a pool of it's own blood. But the wolf doesn't care about the other animal's pain. He just wants answers.

2- Wanderlust and Surprisingly Good Excuses
Chris and I are walking down a path through the forest. I stumble upon the biggest deer antler I have ever seen: it's about the size of my own body, if not bigger. I want to take it with me, but Chris refuses to help. I end up dragging it behind me by myself.

Later, I am no longer myself. I am a Princess, walking through a beautiful meadow with my sister, my guards, and one of our suitors. (Who is a Prince from a faraway land.) We reach the end of the meadow... the edge of the woods. My sister sends all the guards and the Prince away. One of the guards doesn't want to leave us, but the Prince says that they all must obey any command we give.

"We have to hurry, or Mother will find out that we're here by ourselves." As soon as I utter the words, my phone rings. It's our mother. She begins telling me something about Chris coming to the place she works to teach everyone martial arts."

"That's great," I say, not really paying attention. "I have to go now. Love you, bye!"

Time passes. I am riding in a limo with my sister when we get attacked by vampires. Even worse, our mom has somehow found out about us being off in the woods! I managed to get our vampire attack on video, and I use this as an excuse for why we were in the woods by ourselves.

3- Mirrors Hate Me (WILD)
((As I enter SP, it feels as though I'm being drug across carpet. "Oh no, it's the carpet monster!" I think to myself jokingly, waiting for it to stop. Finally the sliding ends, and I feel a shift.)) Okay, I'm in a dream. But I still can't see. Should I open my eyes, or try to see through them? I open them. I now see that I'm lying facedown on the floor, at my grandparent's house. Weird that I ended up here. I give the dream a moment to put itself together, as it looks... fleeting. Once the clarity increases, I stand up and begin to rub my hands together.

I just so happen to look in the mirror as I am doing this. My reflection is EVIL. She is clapping her hands, rather than rubbing them, and laughing like a demon. Her eyes are filled with darkness... "Holy crap, that's freaky," I think, though I am more amused than creeped out. Suddenly my reflection hits me with a jolt of dark energy and I collapse to the floor, waking up.

4- Restless (DEILD)
((I DEILD back into the dream.)) "Okay, no mirrors this time." I pick myself up off the floor where I had fallen and make sure to keep my eyes averted from any reflective surface. There's really no reason for me to be in this house, anyway. I'm going out.

Outside, I ponder over what to do. I should go to my training grounds, but... Out loud, I say, "I want to find Man of Shred or Waking Nomad and see if I can learn anything about shared dreaming." I fly to the top of the house, intending to go to the moon. But...

5- A Lousy Attempt (FA)
...I "wake up." Fine, I'll just DEILD again. I'm already halfway into sleep paralysis, anyway. The only problem is, every time the vibrations start getting intense, my hip feels as if it's dislocating. I can't stop myself: I grab it in pain and get out of SP. I tell myself it's only an illusion, that I am experiencing HI. I am talking to someone who is in the room with me, so I really don't see how I didn't think to RC.

6- More Vampires
I am walking into a vampire restaurant with some people who I'm traveling with. A lady in the doorway takes a snap at me; I merely roll my eyes and keep walking. I watch people as I walk toward the counter. One of the waiters is asking a couple of kids who they are. "Vampires," they answer at the same time. I realize this must be a password for something. "Oh, you must be part of Sadalgo's lot."

I tune them out and order a doctor pepper. I'm hoping they don't add blood to it, like they are for everyone else. "How can she be in here, eating with us?" I hear a voice say. The whispering starts. I see a man glance over to me every so often as he has a hushed conversation on his cell phone. Trouble is coming.

"They're talking about ME," I whisper to my comrades.

"I know."

Outside, I get attacked by that same vampire lady and her slightly chubby male friend. I chase her off and take the guy captive. I have to literally sit on him to keep him him from getting away. I can't let him up until we get the signal that our weapons are ready. At one point, a cute little puppy walks up and starts licking the vampire man in the face. I laugh, enjoying his discomfort.

As soon as we get the signal, more vampires arrive; the battle has begun. I have a weird hand gun that I try shooting, but it doesn't work worth a flip. Annoyed, I throw it to the ground. THIS is why I prefer swords! I run off to the forest, planning to cut off the vampires' reinforcements. Becoming lucid, I pick up a long piece of tree bark and decide to turn it into the Deathcat. One of the vampires attacks me with a huge battle axe. I raise my sword to block, but... "What the heck? It's still a piece of bark!"

I dodge out of the way and draw the Deathcat from my sword belt. I can feel it in my hand, but it seems to be invisible. Oh well, it's still sharp. I parry the vampires next blow, then chop off his weapon arm. Unfortunately, he's wearing so much armor that I can't finish him off.

{I've had to volunteer at the library lately. It's already getting to my head.}

I'm just freaking out because I was supposed to go to the library two hours ago.

I visit a mall, one derived from the Florence Mall in Northern KY that has served as a location for several previous dreams (failed reality check). As I wander around, I hear some snippets of conversation that seem familiar from real life (another failed reality check), including someone explaining their confusion about my roommate's name. The mall is nearing closing time, so nearly everyone is there to exercise. There are runners, walkers, and a large contingent of skaters inside a cavernous skate shop made entirely of wood. There's even a group of people on old-school penny farthing bicycles!
I start to join in the activity by doing lame parkour moves on the planters and benches. I know I could do better, but I'm wearing leather loafers, a blue long-sleeve dress shirt, and khaki pants. Suddenly, my friend C comes running out of nowhere, his impressive red mane streaming from behind him. He starts to race me through the mall, and he puts on a burst of speed I know he could never have in real life. I fall behind, panting and angered, as he runs out of the mall.

I survived Stonehenge Apocalypse, and all I got was this lousy macro.

I drift in and out of sleep as the wind blows my curtain open and closed. I'm watching a slideshow, or a countdown, or a list of clips in order, and why won't the curtain stay shut?

I'm standing on the deck of a hotel, looking down through the pyramid-shaped skylight. I have the feeling that someone's gonna fall through it by the end of the night. There are people milling about, drinking and generally having a good time, and I'm standing inside now.

Misha Collins shows up, once again. (There are subliminal messages on his twitter feed, I swear.) He's standing near the entrance to the pool, looking around and smiling.

"So... why are we here?" I ask.

"It was a robot head," he says seriously.



Swimming Pools. Scare Factor: 1.

14.06.2010

7 (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I was on my bicycle, bicycling down a road near my home. Suddenly I saw lots of police cars passing by and I realised that there was some kind of police meeting in town. All of the police cars looked intimidating, like they wanted to catch me. I also realised that I was speeding on my bike so I tried to slow down but i could not, and I was afraid that some police would arrest me for speeding. I kept on riding and crashed into a net, belonging to a tennis court. Then I was just standing by my crashed bike and feeling kind of uneasy.

13.06.2010

6 (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I have been having troubles remembering my dreams lately and last night i had one that i remember only fragments of.
I was in a big kitchen playing icehockey on rubberfloor. i had iceskates on and i slided like I was on ice. We were like 6 people playing.

18.03.2010

5 (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

This dream took place on a vacation in Thailand with my friends and I remember two days of it.
Day 1:
At first we just walked around in a city and looked around in different stores. In some places we just went in and tasted some food, laughed and went out.
When we came home my friend ate 1,5 blotter of LSD and fell in love with a kiwi and slept with it.

Day 2:
When we woke up the next day my friend with the kiwi ate 2,5 blotters of LSD. Then he asked me nicely to hit his kiwi with a baseballbat. I did it and I got a good hit and it flew long long away.
PS. It was the fruit called kiwi, not the bird .

The end.

13.03.2010

4 (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

This night I had several different dreams.

Part 1:
I just remember jumping down from a high cliff and I landed in different ways all the time. All the jumps were written down for an unknown reason.

Part 2:
I was driving a car into a garage. It was not my car, I had borrowed it from a friend. The garage was very big, more like a big barn and it had maybe three floors. I drove the car into the garage and then i got out of the car and looked around in the barn.
When I was going to leave and go home my friends mother came in. She wondered what I was doing there and I just said that I was borrowing the car. She looked very skeptic and she looked a little bit annoyed. Then I said "it is ok, your son told me that i could borrow it". Then she just said "oh, okay! Well, see you" and she looked kind of satisfied.

Part 3:
I was going home from school with an old female classmate. I was maybe 50 meters in front of her with my bicycle and she was driving a moped. She yelled "Wait!" and I stopped. I took off almost all of my clothes and put them on the rack of my bicycle. When she had came along I started riding my bike and some of my clothes fell of. I picked up some of them and she picked up some. After that we said goodbye and got home.
When I got home nothing looked like it normally does. Everything was renovated. There was only a hot-tub in the bathroom and all the rooms hade switched places and looked very unfamiliar. My mother stood in the kitchen not bothered at all.
I looked on my cell-phone and I had five new textmessages. One of them was from an older male friend and it said "I'm looking for a job again ". I just laughed. Another one was from my classmate (the on i got home from school with). She wrote "I forgot to give you some of your clothes, I can meet you up and give them to you." and i just answered "Okay".
I went out to the hall and got dressed and I saw a black jacket lying on the ground. I picked it up and there was a hand reaching out of it. When I put it down the hand got back into the jacket. I think the dream stopped here because i do not remember anything else.

Part 4:
I was at a party in a big hotel. I was also the host. The party started out good and people were having a good time. Slowly the party became more boring. A friend of mine (who currently is a little bit upset with me) sat in a sofa and refused to answer everything I said to him.
After a while I started calling more people so that the party would get alive again. When I got off the phone, many of the old guests where in a cinema theater in the hotel playing some stupid game, just throwing stuff at eachother and running around laughing.

I am out!

28.02.2010

3 (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

Part 1:
I just remember getting back a test from my teacher.

Part 2:
I was some kind of flying dinosaur, like a Pterosaur or something. Then there were a couple of other dinosaurs. We were chased by a large T. Rex made of rocks in a rocky arena that later changed form to look more lika a library.
The T. Rex stood no chance of catching any of us so later he transformed to a girl and tried to seduce some of us with that schoolgirl-look. He did not have any success with that either and he just got mad and all of us other dinosaurs were laughing at him.
After that the dream just ended.

Peace!

27.02.2010

2 (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I dreamt that I had been on a picnic with some of my old classmates and I was the one who was going to drive us home. I had borrowed a car from a friend (This friend does not have this kind of car in reality). The car was big and looked similar to a Hyundai Veracruz.
Even though i was the one who was going to drive the car started automatically when i was sitting down in the passenger seat looking for something. I told my friend in the back (who is very short) to try and hit the brakes. In some mystical way she bended her leg so that she could reach the pedal but the brakes didnt work! After that I tried the handbrakes and this would not work either.
In the next moment i was in the drivers seat steering the car so that we would not hit some cars or something on the way downhill.
I steered the car out on the sidewalk and i remember thinking "And now the cops will come, I know it!". And there they were. Two copcars coming right at me. They pulled me over and i stopped the car simply by putting my foot out on the ground.
The cops were very mad at me for driving on the sidewalk. I was trying to tell them that the brakes did not work but they kept ignoring me and they just kept on shouting. After a couple of minutes i had the oppurtunity to explain myself and i told them that the only reason that I drove on the sidewalk was because my brakes were broken and I did not want to hit any cars.
When I had explained everything the policeman (who had a big moustache) looked exhausted and just laid down on the hood of his car.
The end.

25.02.2010

1 (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

My old class was out in the forest. We were going to do a couple of runningcompetitions. I remember that it was pretty cold and the lanes was really slippery, because of the ice. Me and a friend was in friendly wrestle at the end.