• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views




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    1. cccii. Ice asteroid field, Strange ravine in Minecraft

      by , 07-15-2021 at 06:17 PM
      13th July 2021

      Fragment:

      In space, Freelancer setting. I'm in a beautiful looking system, but fairly simple and generic. One white star? An ice asteroid field in the distance which I think I'm approaching. I'm with someone else, who's in a different ship, maybe T? Or an NPC like Juni. We're sneaking or getting away from something and we're taking unmapped/unknown travel routes, the type pirates and bounty hunters and freelancers use. This dream might have been from when my alarm went off, I don't remember resetting it.

      Fragment:

      Some interactions with other people. There's a context of survival and maybe one of servitude too (slavery? maybe not though). Most of this dream takes place in an indoors setting and it's daytime outside. There's an overcast characteristic to lighting. I recall some bit where I'm helping someone, they pass me a long-ish cardboard box which doesn't look so strong. As I take hold of it, it's bottom half sort of drops off from the upper lid section. A glass or metal thing drops out, it sounds like glass smashing.

      It's an electron valve or something? But I don't remember looking. The person that was passing me the box, a lady, gets upset with me, but we quickly get over it and we do something else.

      (recall gap?)

      Now I'm on Minecraft. I've just spawned in a new world. It's an unusual ravine locale. I am near and sort of under a 5x5 pillar and then I look around and up. The pillar goes up, a hundred or so blocks, as do other similar ones in the ravine area. Over this pillar is a railroad track laid on top of oak planks going from one side of the chasm to the other.

      The natural stone pillar has decorative stone bricks at the corners in a semi-random fashion and the other pillars are similar. The chasm or ravine is longer than it is wide but seems to mostly be rectangular. I don't recall noticing any ore at all. For some reason, I just fly up and look around. On the rail track, minecarts are going around. They have loot chests on them and I quickly inspect contents as they go past. They seem reasonably OK.

      I think there's another track that runs carts in the opposite direction, just nearby. To either end of the chasm, in terms of longitude, there are these sort of old West mineshaft entrances, which half look like a barn or house. They are built into the natural rock walls. My dream knowledge of the area makes it feel like a classic DOOM map, like actually behind the stone walls there's nothing, as if they are just set dressing.

      I go into one of these mine entrances and it has more loot chests which I inspect. I hear zombies nearby, but ignore them. Then I feel like I hear our doorbell but I start going into a dark stairwell made with oak plank stair blocks. On some level I start to question the reality of this and wake up and ask H if the doorbell had really rang, but no.



      Notes:

      - The Freelancer dream was nice even if a lot of recall went. I always enjoy those dreams because of the way space always looks more realistic than the game did but it still looks more fantastic than space would actually look like anyway. The system was a bit like some Sigma or Tau systems but "felt" closer to core systems.
      -- The dream plot was a generic story/campaign plot, as far as I can recall. I don't recall what my ship was like.

      - I think I haven't had lucid thoughts very much until that dream where the doorbell noise manifested. Notably, the dream entry that follows for the 15th also had a lucidity cue.

      - I would like to think about the symbolism of situation surrounding the smashing object in the second fragment but a bit too tired to think about it, hopefully come back to it at some point.
    2. ccxcvii. Invitation, Unusual BFG

      by , 07-05-2021 at 02:48 PM
      5th July 2021

      Fragment:

      I'm looking at my profile on one of the art sites? I notice I have an unread PM and click to check it. It's from a site moderator I think and I check to see if it really is one, by looking for a certain symbol or something? The message reads at first something like "Dear user, as it is so rare to come across individuals like yourself", going on for a short bit and then asking further down if I'd like to become a moderator, myself.

      There's still some kind of special application process and scrolling through the, actually somewhat long, message, I see some red hyperlink buttons with white text. They have something to do with answering some questions for the application. At the start of these is also a green one and I perceive green as bad? The green one is for saying that you're not interested in this or something.

      I think about this and consider the responsibilities, the kind of things I might have to deal with, potentially unpleasant. And also the fact that it's not a paid role or position, it's voluntary even with the application and so on. Despite all this I still consider applying. Rest of recall faded.

      Fragment:

      In a game world of some kind, with H. It feels like DOOM, Quake or UT. The zone feels a bit void of anything at all, very empty. There's an orange-purple atmospheric effect? The only things that seem to exist around here are some kind of simple and white geometric structures that we walk across. I do some jumping tricks and get up on top of what is supposed to be like a small building. There's a "BFG 9000" here on the flat rooftop, it's a secret pick-up. This BFG has a unique design and is really quite big, as I pick it up I visually note that H gets it too.

      The weapon's design is chunky at the start, then it becomes tri-pronged kind of and extends almost two yards in front. These bits sticking out are like electro-magnetic rails and they are a silvery metal but with a light blue electric glow. The rest of the design is primarily green, the green tone I associate with DOOM.

      Anyway, then a boss or elite enemy appears or something. I consider whether or not we should use our new BFGs on it and end up deciding not and that we should just use regular rocket launchers to fight it. I think about the fact that the BFG has very limited ammo and sooner or later we'll end up firing at the same time anyway in combat situations, effectively wasting shots.



      Notes:

      - On waking and trying to draw the weapon in its most basic form I realised I couldn't imagine what the grip for it could be like. I then realised I've never really paid attention to this detail on BFG designs.

      - The first dream may relate to how I have sometimes done things freely for others because I felt that it was important enough to do as a voluntary thing. The issue has often been for me that I have not been either rewarded nor recognised for it and not even getting some recognition for helping makes it feel like I've been used for my eagerness, ultimately making me feel naive and cynical about such things.
    3. ccxcvi. Helping others and fighting alone or against odds

      by , 07-04-2021 at 10:03 PM
      3rd July 2021

      Fragment:

      (long dreams, recall was good at first, but didn't make enough of an effort to start noting them down)

      Some kind of RPG shooter, maybe a mix of Borderlands and something else, in which I'm helping two other people with a boss. I change to the highest difficulty and also to my best character, on the fly. I become aware that the gear drops will now possibly come with requirements the other players I'm helping won't be able to meet, but I consider that it really shouldn't matter in the long run and should actually be beneficial. It's a small and kind of dark room, can't remember much else about the location.

      (recall faded too much) I'm in a dropship of some kind and I'm next to a tank-like vehicle. We're dropping into a small combat zone, feels like some kind of last-effort push kind of thing? The tank feels like the DRG 'dozer in terms of shape, but bigger, wider. More like a SC Fatboy, but smaller in overall scale.

      Some bit later in a sea rig, also with the dropship or the tank, some family there too?



      4th July 2021

      Fragment:

      Some bit about WoW. At first I'm playing a warrior and I have a huge two-handed weapon, looks very much like Sul'Thraze, but although my character isn't one, the attack animations are that of a troll character.

      It's an unfamiliar and novel area, completely original to the dream as far as I can recall. There's some bit later on, taking place on a small natural incline, grassy and a bit rocky. The colours are all very muted and towards purple hues all the way throughout, there are a few stone ruins. At this last point I'm playing an underleveled warlock and trying to help in a high level group fight.



      Notes:
      - Before bed on the first night, I read the Dreamgates parts in the centre of the book about creativity and read the exercise there again too also while in bed.
      -- I have really enjoyed this part so far and it has been motivating to read and re-read it, especially since I feel I've been accomplishing so little lately.

      - The WoW dream was mostly residue of actual feelings while playing the game, but the troll thing felt a bit different, perhaps because WoW trolls have this tribal aspect associated to them and because of Dreamgates making me think about Shaman-related things

      - Not sure if I've ever had a dream take place in a sea rig before, but possibly.
    4. ccxcv. Creating a quest, working on a comic

      by , 07-04-2021 at 09:44 PM
      2nd July 2021

      Fragment:

      In Outland. Some alternate version of Helfire I've dreamed of before, years ago I think. It's a mix of Netherstorm in terms of landscape features but looks like Helfire. Something about me trying to get to level seventy but I find out that eighty is actually the maximum level, through seeing other players I think.

      There's a back-and-forth mix of D3 and WoW. I'm both trying to create a level twenty or so questline involving dragons, for the zone I'm in, I think; but also trying to work on an art project about an erotica comic in a M/M theme.

      (recall started fading at this point) At one point, I'm working on this comic project and alt-tabbing between games and drawings for reference and then H comes in to this odd office room I'm in and starts talking to me. The room is very wooden? A dark-ish stain, probably? H is kind of having a go at me for "not doing much". I feel annoyed and partly insulted, since I try as much as I can. Constant interruptions occur (not just or only from H but something else) while I'm trying to work on this questline thing.

      The dream eventually deviates into some other bit in a town.

      (recall gap)

      I'm in a subway starting at my home town and I'm sort of composing a train run schedule that will go from a yellow line to the blue line? Stations seem dark and unfamiliar, not to mention cramped, they seem more like my vague memory of the London underground and some other generic subways I've seen.

      I'm alone in this train with the conductor, I'm just in the passenger area at first looking at the maps. Then I knock on the door to the cabin or something and I tell him about what I'll be doing. I can see through the front glass that we are arriving at a station full of people, mostly university students or something, people in school uniforms. I tell the conductor that we can't stop here for now because "that's too many gamers" and that I'll add this station later on into the schedule.

      And I think about how they'd probably end up giving this new route I'm making a very bad reputation and causes issues later on. So I think to myself that they'll just have to catch a different train for now.



      Notes:
      - Feels like it's been a while since a proper subway dream, though I suppose I have had a few not that long ago, that come to mind.
      -- As always this should be enough of a cue to question reality, but it never seems to be enough, nothing seems to be enough.

      - Again, dragons. Dragons are rarely the central topic in my dreams. This time they weren't the focus of eroticism but seems there was still a loose link since I was working on both their questline and the erotic comic.
      -- This thematic could relate both to my difficulty in sticking to a single project and to the fact that I always want to do really involved things. Doing either a comic or a full questline are projects that require a lot of time and attention. Relating to the difficulty in sticking to a project, I often lose track of myself and my attention to things when things start feeling long.

      - Unusually, the train was symbolically under my control though indirect influence of its compliant conductor, maybe a metaphor about navigation, guidance or inability to lead action directly.
      -- Relating to this, I have found that I am much calmer and more able to work effectively if I'm not directly in charge of something. If I am in advisory or assisting role, I tend to be able to remain emotionally detached for better results. Thinking further about this, ironically this is not the case when it comes to doing artwork for others, since that's still primarily based on my own ability to lead artistically (since I'm not being asked to emulate another artists' style).

      - When in the dream H has a go at me, I think this is actually a metaphor for me having a go at myself. I do sometimes think I'm not trying as hard as I could be. I often think about how it feels like I'm not leading myself anywhere but also about how it feels so hard without anyone guiding me.
      -- The irony to me feels like even under guidance I still feel like I'm not getting guidance, which makes me feel like it's a problem relating to myself only and not to others and their interactions with me.
    5. 29 May - False lucid and real lucid

      by , 05-30-2021 at 03:04 PM
      comment dream lucid

      Thinking a lot about dreaming before falling asleep.

      Ramp
      Driving a motorbike off a ramp, jumping into the air. It was supposed to test something, maybe how someone got killed. Beaches all around and low tide.

      Walk with V
      With V in the forest, talking about how often I go out. I told him I help my family walking their dog.

      Hair
      I was talking with someone about which hairstyle I would like.

      False lucid
      I was walking down a path, playing some game. I think I did it for a second time and in an opposite direction, but that was just a vague memory. The rules were that you had to be lucid and do various tasks.
      There was a corner of a rock where the path led along a narrow ledge and I met a boy and a girl there. I offered the girl if she wanted to sit with me for a while and we crawled into this grassy alcove, letting the boy pass.
      I asked her what her name was and she told me her name. I told her I was Indigo. I asked how it was going so far and she said good, but she actually wanted to go so she wouldn't waste her time. So we said goodbye.
      It occurred to me that I've been lucid for a long time, that I've never had a LD this long, like 2 hours. But good for me - long LD = better chance of winning for me, while others have to do it in parts.
      I checked the paper with the tasks and it said to rubb our hands, so I did it, even though I thought I didn't need to, but I saw the organizer in front of me, so I wanted to get points.
      Then I saw more organizers around the corner and there was a fridge and I climbed on it and rearranged some food. I suddenly knew they were evil and decided to confront them - I told them I knew who they were and that they were serving the dark lord. They had a gun. I said they could kill me, but I had a plan to escape by waking up
      I closed my eyes and opened them and nothing, I was still there. That surprised me. I tried again and failed again. I remembered the reddit poll "can you wake up from a LD" and my answer "yes, reliably". That's what I get for that.
      I tried blinking really fast again, but it didn't work.
      Then I was in this labyrinth of big metal cabinets. I felt like I'd been lucid for an awfully long time, hours. I asked the organizers what they had done to my body in reality, that I was still asleep. They grinned, which worried me. Maybe I'm in a coma or something. But maybe not, and I have to wake up sometime. I figured there was probably a purpose for me there, something I needed to do. Somehow save everything and defeat them.
      I had this stick in my hand with some roots on the end. I've been poking around under the cupboards with it, seeing if there's some object that will allow me to save everything. I must have a reason to have that stick for...
      I felt myself waking up, and I thought "finally".

      I knew instantly that I was waking up from a false lucid.

      I logged keywords for the dream because I really liked it and wanted to remember.
      I felt confident that there could be a LD after this. I reiterated the intention to lucid dream. It took me some time to fall asleep again.

      Train to Birmingham
      I was at the station and it was about trains. Z said there was a train leaving for Birmingham and she was going to take it. I said that the train to Birmingham was useless to me, that we usually go via Manchester, and she was surprised.
      I walked with her on the way to the trains and there was the time and the Birmingham sign by the steps to the platform and it was flashing as if the train was about to leave. I hesitated for a moment but let it go, it wouldn't do me any good.
      I went back to the main concourse to look at the departures board to see what else was coming. The board was just changing.
      That's all I remember - the next was probably the transition into the false awakening.

      Real lucid - Meeting my dream guide
      I woke up in our bedroom and immediately suspected it was a FA. But as soon as I realized it, my vision got worse and I could only see two blurs. I was afraid I was going to wake up, but I knew I was still in a dream. It occurred to me to start picturing a deck chair and a beach or something, as what people do when they have sleep paralysis.
      Suddenly something disturbed me and I opened my eyes and I was awake and it was still a FA. Yes!
      I sat on the bed and R was awake next to me and there was also J. I knew I could ignore them, but I wanted to make them disappear with a snap of my fingers like in the daydream rehearsal, so I tried, but it didn't work, which I guess amused them a little.
      I started looking at what was the same in the room and what was different. Almost everything looked the same to me. There were these shelves and these pictures. I noticed that the frames of the pictures were a different color than they were IRL (actually, almost everything was different and we had no pictures or shelves IRL).
      There was also a wall cabinet with a brown fabric curtain and I had the feeling that something green was peeking out - an iguana. I went to look, but my cat came out.
      Goals! Verbal commands and then meeting my dream guide. I try "Clarity now!" but the dream already has great clarity, so what can improve? On the contrary, it gets slightly worse. But only for a moment. I leave the room and try "Increase lucidity", but nothing noticeable happens. I see a green jacket on the rack and I try to make it disappear. Might be easier than with humans. But nothing. I try again and the whole hallway to the living room disappears in a blur.
      I use the door to the second bedroom and walk into a large room that looks like a gym. There are mats, exercise equipment, and large windows facing the city street.
      I try to do a somersault on the mat, but I stop halfway through and just roll. The movement feels realistic.
      Goals! I walk across the room and shout "Dream, dream, give me my dream guide".
      I turn around and there's a curtain to the left of the windows (probably a mini room with more equipment) and my guide comes out from behind the curtain. She's a black woman, in her fifties, maybe early sixties (probably not, her hair is still dark brown/black and not grey), curvy but not obese, with big boobs. I met her once before in a daydream and she was an old white woman but I know itís her.
      I said, "You've been here the whole time." She nods.
      We go and sit down on the leather upholstered couch that's appeared there for us. I said I didn't know how much time we had, or maybe she asked, either way, I knew she wanted and needed to know.
      I replied, "I'm not going to lie to you. I didn't come straight here. But I tried not to linger too long."She nods.
      I asked: "Will you teach me something?" She smiled.

      I started to wake up. Maybe she wanted to teach me DEILD? But more likely I was too excited
    6. cclxiii. Lodged bullet, Upheaval

      by , 05-05-2021 at 08:53 PM
      2nd May 2021

      Fragment:

      Initially something about Terraria. I'm on some kind of mini MMO server. It's 2D at first as it should be, but then starts to become 2.5D and eventually blends into normal reality as I exit some caves I'd been mining in. There was a lot of ore in the caves, but mostly copper and iron.

      I exit the cave to an exterior location. It's sunny but I'm under the shade of a metal canopy of some kind. I have guns like in UT or something. There are some flying enemies nearby, to my right, and I think about shooting them with a beam weapon but I don't for some reason. They have wings? Are they eyes, maybe? Some kind of stereotype fantasy creature, at any rate.

      Then I climb or jump down further ahead, where there's a lower roof, using it as a midway point to the ground. There's a human but he's some kind of boss? I'm talking with H at the same time, discussing what's happening I think. Some recall is missing but I eventually change to a traditional sniper rifle and fire at point blank range against the man's neck. I can imagine the bullet and it goes through the front of the neck but leaves no visible wound or blood and it gets lodged under the cranium at the back, on the right side.

      But then the person becomes H and I turn the head to inspect and there's the lump of the bullet about where I thought it would be. I tell H it's fine, we'll get someone to remove it.



      4th May 2021

      Fragment:

      Something about schools part of a network/group called "plus (something)"? I'm in a town but unsure where. Reminds me of my native country and there's these small and perfectly laid out buildings, which are taking over everywhere as if they are invading and replacing other things. The buildings are alien in origin or something, the dream implies, but they look like regular buildings in a modern style, though having something to do with this group of schools or something.

      There's some kind of instancing effect going on and things phase in and out of reality depending on where I stand exactly; in the phase space there are only two specific things to eat for some reason and this becomes a way for me to identify that I'm in this phased space. I think something about the colour of the atmosphere changes too but recall is somewhat muddled and partly gone and some bits of this feel as if they were from an earlier awakening.

      Some recall is missing but later on, there's some bit in a kitchen underground in a bunker of some kind and this is like the headquarters of whatever is going on. In this kitchen, there are two women, they are busy cooking and concocting things? I think they have aprons on but I don't recall any other details other than that maybe one had her hair tied up. They are the masterminds, it's implied somehow. They don't seem to care about my presence. The door to the kitchen is locked with some type of electronically controlled lock and some people want to get in here because a meteor is crashing soon and this is the safest place, even within the entirety of this bunker. There's a large window into the next room and there are random groupings of people through there. I remember interacting and talking with the two women but I'm not sure what any of us said.

      Then the meteor hits and some people outside the room get scared but nothing much happens other than some prolonged shaking.

      (recall gap)

      Outside with someone, implied to be after the meteor hit on the surface. I was here before at some point in the dream but it wasn't like this, everything looks kind of orange and wrecked now, debris and general mess everywhere. There are dead headcrabs? The person I'm with is cooking and eating them.

      (gap)

      Some other bit where I see a city like London (which layout I know vaguely) in some kind of overview and it's broken up by ravines and mountains. Someone wants a new map made to reflect all this or something and I or another dream character draw it on some kind of black sandy stuff with a stick or rod? The lines are a dark blood red.
    7. cclvi. Fuzzy reality, Memories, teaching a friend and dad's cancer

      by , 04-22-2021 at 03:10 PM
      22nd April 2021

      There are quite a few personal thoughts and notes here but I guess when are dreams ever anything other than personal? But this took me quite a while to type up, which is frustrating on some level.

      Fragment:


      Playing DII, with the barbarian. I remember I look at the waypoints and see I'm in Act 3 but it's actually hell (Act 4). The colours all look weird, the character looks a fuzzy dark navy blue on some parts. It's generally dark and I am going to where Diablo "lives", I remember going past the hellforge or something.

      Very little recall of this dream but it had a strange feel to it, a bit like some of the weirder pre-sleep dreams I used to get as a kid, where reality made no sense with waking physics and was all fuzzy like static noise.

      (DFLN) Dream:

      Spoiler for Lengthy dream:


      Spoiler for Notes, spoilered for length:

      Updated 04-22-2021 at 03:13 PM by 95293

      Categories
      non-lucid , side notes
    8. ccxlvii. Space combat, Swamp trials

      by , 04-08-2021 at 11:14 AM
      8th April 2021

      Scraps:

      (chronology unknown)

      I'm in a ship in space. There's a Freelancer feel to things but things look more realistic. I'm flying with two escorts through some kind of debris field and when we encounter some hostiles I shoot one of my wingmen by accident at one point. My ship has enough firepower that it's pretty much a one-shot kill and a message comes up and tells me I have failed the mission. I can't understand it because the wingmen were not marked as mission-critical.

      I click retry or something but then I'm doing different things. Vague recall of a more normal Freelancer sequence where I'm in an Eagle and using Salamanca weapons. Intense manoeuvring.

      Some other sequence. Also in a game of some kind? Doing some kind of time-trial thing and there's a score multiplier that goes up to x30. It works like the DOOM arcade trials in a sense but the game itself is a mix of RoR2 and something else, having a more crude feel to it. There's a swampy area I go through and maybe some kind of ancient temple. The ambience seems a bit grungy and not particularly bright.

      Another thing, relating to the space bit. I am in some kind of station, it's advanced. There's a lot of green and black and I think there are many enemies. My relative power level to theirs is massively superior but it still takes a little bit of time to clear enemies. I'm trying to get to an access or lift perhaps. The area has a very open-design kind of look and is like some kind of massive sci-fi raid dungeon.
    9. ccxli. Giving a boy a ride, Tank-driving and deity avatar fighting

      by , 03-23-2021 at 03:00 AM
      21st March 2021

      Dream:

      At a dining table? Not sure if it's even in a room exactly, but there's a feel of the dining room at my old home. Mom and T are playing some strange eastern game or something involving objects they throw over to each other. The table is long like a festive dining table? Something about decorating it.

      The trim of the table has been painstakingly put together from dozens or hundreds of strips of decorative paper or something. Another bit uses some kind of holographic projection. I wonder or ask why it simply wasn't all done with the projection method.

      (recall gap)

      Some bit in a town. Looks like my native country, streets very similar to that of towns near where I used to live. I'm coming up a hilly bit on foot. There's someone I'm supposed to meet and pick up but I have to tell him I won't be able to. I see him by some kind of public transport stop.

      He's a black teen, with short hair. I ask him if he's waiting for one of us, from my family. He confirms that he is. I then explain that I won't be able to take him because I don't have a car right now. Dad or L is using it?

      He doesn't seem to be disappointed and explains that he got a vehicle of his own and will be able to use that; it's some kind of trike?

      I ask him to be careful, I think I'll feel responsible if he has an accident.




      22nd March 2021

      Dream:

      I'm in a tank, at first in some kind of RTS-like view mode, but soon after moving around this scenario for a bit it changes to a regular (closer) third-person view.

      I find some targets along the way and destroy them, as I'm headed somewhere. An enemy base of some kind? The enemy units seem frightened and try to keep as much distance as possible and avoid me. I fire the main cannon but also use the secondary gun to destroy enemy targets.

      I remember feeling myself use a keyboard and maybe seeing it too (old yellowed keyboard?) to control cannon pitch and yaw. I also have a secondary type of ammo for the cannon, some miniature warheads, which I use a few times?

      Eventually, after all the ground targets are down, I head towards a square-ish hole in the ground. I switch to a first person view now, in which I can see the cannon sticking out. I "crawl" down into the hole slowly, not wanting to fall down as there is a drop and a boss down below. Some kind of giant, an avatar of some deity I think.

      I try firing one of the warheads into the room below since I don't actually have direct line of sight to the boss but it doesn't seem to affect it, as a health bar for the boss an a UI remains unchanged.

      Hesitant, I eventually go down. I engage this avatar in combat using my main cannon and trying to keep my distance from its swiping. The avatar has a muscled and male form, it's colouration is dark, maybe a black tone like basalt.

      He talks to me as he fights, but I cannot recall what about. I don't do much damage and the boss kills me eventually. I respawn in a chamber adjacent to the boss room. The whole place has an ancient classical look to it. Although this passes me by in the dream, it actually reminds me of Act2 levels from Daikatana.

      The boss room itself had a very similar look. It is octagonal and with a few (sort of) central pillars. There's a shallow level of water and it looks clear. This water is also present in the other large room I was respawned in.

      After a tiny bit of exploring? I try to get the boss to come out of his room since there's actually more room to fight him in this one. It doesn't work though, he's apparently "leashed" and eventually I just go back in the main boss room again.

      I can't recall the rest but the dream went on for quite a while.


      Notes:
      - I don't know why but I feel compelled to register a sudden observation. Lately in dreams I feel there has been some absence of emotion.

      - The deity's avatar was probably based off some recent boss fights in some games.

      - Although it's unusual that I had some awareness of the keyboard in a way that made me step out of "tunnel vision", for the most part in that dream I was just immersed into its reality in the same way that I am when playing a game in waking reality.
    10. ccxl. Black cat, Expanded cafe

      by , 03-23-2021 at 02:42 AM
      17th March 2021

      (didn't capture recall before it faded)

      Fragment:

      I am driving; I'm in the middle of a fast changing situation?

      I made a game of some kind and I'm playing through it. Maybe it's like Doom in gameplay but some part of it makes me think of AvP.



      18th March 2021


      Fragment:


      Black cat, rubbing it under where the rib cage started as it seemed to be where it enjoyed it most. Unusually, this unnerved me a bit for some reason. H is sitting next to me and giving the cat attention too. The cat resembled Y. (in-lne note, it's possible it unnerved me because a dream character is effectively a part of me, and I don't particularly like being touched under or on the sternum but I wouldn't have much of a problem with doing this with a pet if it's what it wanted)

      Fragment:


      At my old home's town. Driving down through the avenue that is by the church. I'm a passenger. The driving and such are all on the correct side.

      I see the cafe that's to my left, the one that has the office supplies shop. It's front end is being expanded, like they're adding on to the in-door esplanade space. In the dream I assume this has something to do with Covid and social distancing.
    11. Guitar playing upstairs. Can't see but feel and drink.

      by , 03-06-2021 at 04:39 PM (DJ of lucid goals and how it goes)
      I'm upstairs with some people. One of them play the guitar and I also want to play. After a while I take the guitar and start to play "who says" by John Mayer, it feels very realistic. Elina says something about how good it is to be able to play guitar and that I should keep it going.

      I went to sleep very late and know that I usually get lucids when I resleep in the morning. I program my brain to know that it's going to be a dream when I re-sleep which created this intresting dream.

      It's pitch black but I'm councious. I'm trying to feel where I am because I can't use my vision and touch a wooden surface. I now know that I am in the kitchen. I try to get my vision but does not succeed. I feel my way foreward and come to the sink. I feel on the metallic water tap and turn it on. I put my mouth under and drink some water and it feels realistic. I try to open my eyes but I'm afraid that I might open my real eyes and wake up. Somehow I enter a game in a fast transition and lose my lucidity. My whole view is a pixilated game that is in a third person view tomb with a dark brown color theme. I'm an adventerur who dodge some tornadoes thrown away at me by some wizards.

      I woke up thirsty with a dry throat because I was drinking in the dream.
      Categories
      non-lucid , lucid
    12. ccxvii. Daikatana marshes, Art anxieties, Nobody wearing a mask

      by , 01-26-2021 at 08:03 PM
      25th January 2021

      Fragment:

      Something Daikatana-like? I visit several dream locations but a few of those are marshes like in the first act of the game.

      I remember going into a disused entrance. Dark, wet. Some blue light or reflection from the water. Vines and so on? I'm here to find a body and destroy it, a friend or ally's body. Someone else is either with me, or guided me here.

      26th January 2021


      Dream:

      I'm browsing the usual art site. I'm looking at someone's profile and see that I'm on some list of skilled artists this person likes, I think I am surprised by this, but appreciative.

      Later, I return to the same profile? I see I am no longer on that list and spot an entry talking about the reasoning behind including each artist under a specific category. I'm listed apparently because of some KH (from BL) piece I made. They also mention how and why they chose to exclude me from their favoured artists' list, but I forget the details.

      There's an animation on this entry... It's their main character, a dark-blue, almost black furred wolf/canine. The animation loops and the character grins as he cuts off the ring finger from his right hand.

      I feel disappointed, or hurt.

      Dream:

      I'm outside, a typical city of some kind. I'm not wearing a mask and feel that I should be. I'm at a sports area and there are dozens of people of all ages, including young kids, though I think mainly kids. I become concerned because none of these people doing sports or playing outdoor games are wearing any masks. It makes me apprehensive and I almost feel as though I can see the particulates of their normal breathing in the air.

      I leave this area. I remember some roads. It's day time but I forget what the sky is like exactly. I'm walking through some street under an overpass. Someone is walking along with me but I forget who. We are having a conversation and we pass several people, some don't make any effort to move out of our way even though we are practically up against a wall on the side anyway. I feel apprehensive again about transmission.

      I can't recall where we go or end up.



      Notes:
      - Maybe it's only natural that I've been getting these dreams about the art browsing again. Lately I have been a bit more active and have felt the same anxieties and maybe frustrations that I was feeling around the last times I was having this sort of dream.
      -- I think I felt so hurt because I feel people are so changeable and I have been finding it very difficult to connect with anyone in that world. Too often I end up feeling just too different despite having virtually similar interests.

      - The outdoor dream had a grey or desaturated feel to it.

      Updated 01-26-2021 at 08:09 PM by 95293

      Categories
      non-lucid , dream fragment , side notes
    13. I'm a dragon that wants to dance. I can fly but need support.

      by , 01-20-2021 at 08:58 AM (DJ of lucid goals and how it goes)
      I'm walking on a big sea with Albin. I don't know if anyone told me but I'm a dragon too. There are some red lightnings and mini thunder storms over the water. I tell Albin that I get a bad feeling from the red lightnings as I fly up in the air, inspecting the lightnings from above. Albin tells me that I need to cross the red lightnings in order to enjoy life. There is a door to a big room with some red lightnings in front of it. Albin invites me but I don't want to go in because of the red lightnings. I decide to go in anyway after some time. There are a bunch of people in there that are dancing traditional fast paced pair dances. I join a girl in my age with dark hair. We dance some kind of dance where you touch hands in the air above your heads and take big steps to the sides, almost jumping. I really enjoy myself. I fly to the roof as the dream transitions to some kind of game where I see different characters' portraits. I see a dragon man that I apparently have a 73 % win rate with.

      I'm at some kind of party with my cousins and big family. I am able to fly but only really bad. I see some helium balloons against the roof and figure that if I use them I will be able to fly better. When I take them down they drop down as if they never had helium in them. I talk with Elina and she tries to find a book that she can rip apart in order to give me some wings that I can use to fly better. She finds a book about horses that she wants to rip apart. I ask her if it doesn't belong to anyone. Sara comes in and apparently it's hers. I tell Elina that we can't destroy it. I fly away but not that good. There is some kind of discus competition where people throw things with style in order to collect points.
    14. ccxi. Mission rewards, old theme park

      by , 01-17-2021 at 11:29 AM
      15th January 2021

      Dream:

      I am delivering a Borderlands mission. The UI is like BL1 but I'm not actually in one of the games from the series. I can choose between two legendary rewards. One is a sniper and the other a grenade launcher. I check for some kind of extra stats which are supposed to appear in blue; the grenade launchers' tooltip is greatly expanded and there's something about it having a unique ability which allows summoning one of five vehicles of choice.

      I'm what looks like either a warehouse district or an airbase/military base. Mom and dad are here and some other people I don't recall, too. H is nearby?

      Anyway, I decide to summon one of the vehicles. It's a very Metal Slug-esque tank and it has a somewhat shiny panelling, either red or grey.

      Skipping ahead a bit. In an abandoned, disused or ruined area. I go through some dark tunnel and fighting stuff happens. Then an interaction with some character makes me reveal that it had been some kind of theme park, long ago (I surprise myself?).

      There is what looks like giant heads of an extremely realistic-looking horse and a canid of some sort. Their mouths or lips move about, but as if swaying with no control. I think about it a little bit and conclude it's the wind. We are near the coast. It's sunny but sunset-like and looks like a scene off DSII; the lips of the animal heads look ripped, like they're made of leather or some kind of heavy duty material chosen to be close enough to real textures.

      I think some part of me thinks about drawing.
    15. ccx. Digging under tiles for gold

      by , 01-14-2021 at 10:48 AM
      14th January 2021

      Fragment:


      Something about being at a family gathering of some sort. The house is a mix of my old home and my aunt B's house.

      My siblings are here but I don't recall the room we're in. We play some kind of reality-blended game in which I am looking for gold to be found under floor tiles. I remember we discuss some game statistics. I cut up some tile and beneath I find copper pipe for water and am slightly disappointed and relieved I didn't cut through it.

      In the kitchen, which looks like the oldest version of the one from the old home, I see some kind of little poster or card about mood and being sorry from my aunt.

      Vague recall of using one of those rounded metal body box cutters.

      The atmosphere was like the blinds were all rolled down but allowing light through. There was a warm look of light that I haven't seen for some time now.
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