All DJ Entries

For my tea last night I ate LOADS of chinese food. Much more than usual... I was feeling hungry
I felt fine after but all that greasy food must have had a bad reaction....

Anyway, I went to bed as usual that night and awoke midway through the night with the most terrible stomach ache, I thought I was going to be sick. I sat up in bed and my girlfriend said something to me (I asked her about it today and she said I just mumbled some incoherent reply)...
I was definately awake, but at the same time when I closed my eyes I saw a bizarre vision.

In my vision I was sitting encased in the centre of a mountain. My aching belly all bloated up like I was pregnant. The pain would shoot out of my belly and crack the rock around me. The cracks opened up into wide burrows through the mountain (I saw it as a cross-section from the side. Imagine a mountain shape with wide cracks opening up in a semicircle from my belly, like a cartoon sun with rays radiating outwards).

One the surface of the mountain, where the cracks emerged I saw chinese dragons in a figure 8 shape. Upon looking at the dragons I was able to feel the rise and fall of many ancient civilisations.

The whole vision was very engrossing. I was aware that I was awake, and that it was just a dream/vision, but it was as if I was right there when I closed my eyes. Like existing in 2 places at once.

After a while the vision faded and I went back to sleep.

Also, this was my first day trying Silene Capensis. I wasnt expecting any results from it this early so I am not sure what this was. Most likely it was something similar to a fever-dream brought on by my bad stomach and too much greasy food... but very strange!

I'm on a break from thinking too much about LDing. This has made my dreams easier to remember, perhaps because there is less pressure on my brain.

Just like in real life, I am sick and laying down to rest on the bed. It's my same bed, but it's in the flat I had with my ex, near Berlin. Or at least, I recognize it as such, but this flat is actually much more beautiful and expensive looking.

My ex is in the other room, with him are two of his friends, both of whom I know from when we lived in Vancouver. I get up to go out, passing through a room/hallway that has my ex's computer in it. It's on. I glance at the screen and see some form of Messenger running - though it's not MSN. On it are active conversations from other friends of his in Vancouver. They all appear to be congratulating him and the two friends that are visiting, wishing them all the best and lots of fun. It doesn't say so, but I gather that my ex and his two friends are going to move in together. I wonder to myself if it will be here in Germany, or in Ireland, where he is living in RL now. I briefly wonder why he is back in Germany again.

I move to the next room. They are talking and laughing loudly, but go quiet when I enter. Awkward. I am looking for something healthy to eat, as I am not feeling well. All I can find is a big paper bag full of all kinds of junk food. They all freak out when I find it, and I tell them to relax, I don't want their stupid crap food. Not finding anything, I leave the room. My ex follows me.

In the room with the computer again, my ex immediately notices that his screen has been scrolled. He looks worried and slightly angry, asking me if I read his conversation. I say "Why would I want to read your conversation?" and look away. He seems to believe me. I feel guilty for lying.

Flash now to one of his friends questioning me - he's asking me if my ex and I are getting back together, or "kissing and making up" as he calls it. I look at him like he's nuts and tell him as much, saying that's the last thing I want. I can tell my ex's friend is just asking to make sure it's a safe bet to move in with him, but I'm not supposed to know so I stay quiet.

Feelings: confusion, guilt, bitterness, alienation, a feeling of jealousy when looking around the nice flat

The taste in your mouth is so disgusting that you have dreams about it.

I am seventeen. I can’t see anything except blackness, but when I look down I can see my own body, and a ring of light around my feet. Suddenly, I can feel something growing inside my mouth. It has the squishy feeling of cheek cells, but it has the consistency of mushy gravel. I spit it out, but it keep growing. I keep spitting and spitting, but with every spit it grows faster. I start to puke violently in a futile attempt to get the gravel out. It has filled up my mouth, and now it starts to grow down my throat. I gag on the gravel-mush and keep puking it out, but it’s useless. The gravel starts to grow in my stomach. I can feel my stomach bloat up like a giant balloon full of the mysterious growth. I look down, and my stomach is the size of a watermelon, and it keeps growing. I keep trying to barf the gravel out, when my stomach bursts open. The pink cheek-cell gravel stuff pours out of my stomach like sewage waste. Then everything goes black.

I often have dreams of getting cancer. Unfortunately, this is pretty much the only one I remember well enough to type out.

I am twelve years old, and I am at my house, sitting on the couch, when suddenly, I feel excruciating pain in my left arm. It feels like my skin is being ripped off. I look down at my arm, and what I see makes me physically sick. My arm has turned black and blue, and it looks like it has been boiled. Then, as I watch, a giant blood cell shaped like a concave donut rises up from my veins, bulging under my skin. But it wants to keep growing. It grows larger and larger, and the skin gets vacuumed to the blood cell. It hurts so much I start to scream. Then, more blood cells rise up from the surface like some sort of pox. Little ones, big ones, medium sizes ones, hundreds of them, until my arm is a lumpy mass of blood cells.
I scream and run to my dad, holding my arm in my right hand. I run up to him and show it to him. He looks at it carefully, then says, “Hmm, I guess I’m gonna have to take you to the doctor. But for now, just push them down.” I try to push down on one, but it only slides between my skin and my muscle, ripping my skin off my muscles. I slowly slide it all the way around my arm. It slides under my bone and goes away. I keep doing this until I get to the doctor.
The doctor looks at my arm and says, “hmm, it appears you have skin cancer.” He pulls out a needle the size of a hammer and jams it into my arm. It feels like I’m being stabbed. He injects me with a liquid, and it makes the blood cells disappear. “They will come back until you have chemotherapy, but until then, just shoot it up when they come back.” He hands me the giant needle and walks out. In a matter of seconds the blood cells return. I inject myself but they just grow larger. They grow and grow until my arm bursts and everything goes black.

This is one of the dreams that still makes me sick to my stomach when i think about it. Another one is when I again had skin cancer, which caused my arms to grow wooly mammoth hair and my leg hairs to grow thick, rubbery, and hollow like rubber tubing.

Note: These are some dreams where I don't remember the entire thing from beginning to end, these are basically fragments that I remember.

*Damned Templars!*
I was in my front yard and I was lucid, though I don't know how I became lucid, I just was. I remembered the goal I had was to locate Xildron so I could try to heal him and change him back to his dragon form. The portal I opened was directed to locate Xildron, it took a few minutes, but it finally opened and I went into it. Everything was going normally until there appeared to be some kind of explosion right in the middle of my wormhole, and I was thrown out of it and onto a gray dusty surface like that of the moon. I immediately jumped up and looked around to see where I had landed. It didn't look like Earth's moon at all, there was a bright blue star shining in the sky, and I could see a giant ringed planet that the moon was orbiting around. Another thing I saw was that I was completely surrounded by Templars, several of them were chuckling at me, a few others looked annoyed, a couple of them looked like they were scared… Those assholes had interrupted my search for Xildron!

I was really too pissed off at them to think about what their reason for stopping me was, whether it was deliberately to keep me from reaching Xildron or if it was not related to that search. The Templars moved to attack me, and I attacked them at the same time, forming Witchblade into a sword and cutting the first couple that came at me clean in half. The ones who had been laughing were no longer amused, the ones who looked pissed were attacking me more aggressively, and the ones who had appeared afraid had actually turned around and run for it. I took care of the ones attacking me with a blast of flames that tracked in on each one of them. The Templars were all consumed in flames, tendrils from Witchblade reached out and grabbed the ones running away, wrapping around them and crushing them to death. Those stupid Templars always get in the way at the wrong time!

*So Very Angry*
Alicia and I were walking through the swap meet looking at the various things that were for sale there. Most everything I saw there was junk, something I wouldn't take home even if the seller paid me to take it. The reflection of sunlight off of metal drew my attention into a jewelry shop. Alicia followed me as I went inside to browse the items that were for sale within. Trash. That's what they were selling, shelves and shelves of trash, plastic rings, candy necklaces, kid's jewelry that was so obviously fake that it wasn't even funny. So what was it that had drawn my attention from so far away? Just then, I saw the sunlight reflecting off of a piece of jewelry on a display near the outside of the seller's stall. I went over and looked at what turned out to be a bracelet with beautiful blue stones around it. There was a second silver bracelet there that looked like a southwestern design. I thought I might want one of those. I wanted to browse a bit more. I looked around the rest of the booth, then came back to choose a bracelet, the blue one. Both were gone. I asked where they had gone. Alicia said she had bought them. Both of them?! She said yes. I got pissed, I was yelling at her and saying she had taken everything worth buying in the store. She said it wasn't everything… I asked the shop owner if they had any more decent jewelry. She said no. I yelled at Alicia some more about taking all of it, I was pissed… I yelled at her a lot more, told her she should give me one of the bracelets since I had found them first, hand over the blue one, you bitch! You selfish bitch! Alicia turned and left the store in tears, leaving me thinking I had been too hard on her over a small issue and wondering why I had gotten so angry.

*Don't Brush Your Hair With a Toothbrush!*
I was in an apartment with a man, I don't know who he was. I had the idea it was a temporary arrangement due to some natural disaster. I watched him get up one morning and go into his bathroom. He didn't close the door because he wasn't using the toilet. I saw he was grooming himself. He shaved most of his beard off, leaving only sideburns there. Didn't he know those were out of style? It didn't really matter. I wasn't the fashion police… The man made a strange face of frustration as he tried to get his sideburns to lie down properly and was totally unsuccessful, the more he messed with them the more they wanted to stand up. Finally he got a smirk on his face. He took his toothbrush from a drawer, wet it, and began brushing his sideburns with his toothbrush… um… yuck… I wondered why he was doing that, although it became quickly clear that the attempt was a success. He smirked as he made the hair lie down exactly how he wanted it to. He then proceeded to brush his teeth with the same toothbrush… definite yuck. I left to the kitchen to make some breakfast. A short time later, the man came out and asked if I could please fix him eggs, since I do such a good job. He smiled broadly… and all of his teeth were covered in rot… yuck! I told the man he shouldn't brush his hair with a toothbrush unless he wanted the lice to eat his teeth.

*Down With the Sickness*
I was in my bedroom getting ready to go to school. I rolled out of bed and went to the other room. I had my breakfast as usual, heated up a frozen egg, cheese, and sausage muffin, then went around and hugged on each of my cats. They were all soft, cuddly, and sweet as usual. There was nothing going on that even vaguely indicated this was not a completely normal day. That is everything was normal until I went into the bathroom to take care of doing my hair for the day. I noticed it looked strangely out of place, not like it normally does first thing in the morning. My hair is short, so there is usually very little to be done with it to make it look good enough for my liking. This time it was all hanging at weird angles… Oh, well. I would have to wet it down before I could brush it properly. I splashed water on my face and head, then started brushing my hair. Huge chunks of the hair were coming out on the brush! This continued until the entire crown of my head was bald, completely bald. The rest of the hair seemed firmly attached, but the crown of my head was bald! I tried hopelessly for a comb-over like some men try to get away with, then I looked at my scalp to see it was red and irritated, covered with strange soars. I could only stare at that and wonder over and over, "What is wrong with my body?" I was clearly quite sick, I didn't want anyone to notice, but I was sure I would have to see a doctor about this one.