I think I'm fighting myself and my recall. I'll wake up from a pretty vivid dream and be too lazy to open up my computer and take notes on it. It is sort of self defeating. I remember that I had two pretty vivid dreams. But this is the only one I can remember and, at that, I can only remember a part of it: I was at some sort of party in a big dining room. There was a good crowd of people there and it seemed like everybody didn't like me. I remember constantly getting pointed out and made fun of or angrily talked about. I had no idea what I did. I then remember making "friends" with this crippled guy. He had to walk with walkers because his legs didn't work. It was odd. But anyways after talking to him I excused myself to go to the restroom and a moment later he, the crippled guy, comes hobbling in. I remember that I was in the stall and when I heard the door open I knew it was him and I was terrified. He opened the door to my stall and his mouth was taped shut but I could still hear him talk (that shoulda been a dream sign, right there!) but instead of waking up because of the obvious sign he goes to tackle me. Being full bodied I manage to throw him aside. And then I'm in a hallway and trying to half crawl and half hide. I'm sitting at the corner of a tiled hallway when three women walk by. They are younger, like 19 or so, and completely ignore me when they walk by. I remember hearing them say something mean about me and I took a swing at one of their legs. They round the corner. I turn back to my edge of the hall and see across the hall a group of guys are sitting in desks and some taller man is walking back and forth by them. In my dream I realize the guy in the first desk is Josh Howard, an NBA player. In my dream I remember thinking "This doesn't look like Josh Howard." But it doesn't phase me. I end up grabbing his leg and shaking it and saying, "You're Josh Howard?!" and he nods while trying to pay attention a little bit to the tall man. But he obviously loves the attention. Then I say, "Man, I LOVED you with the Dallas Mavericks in 06-07." He grins, obviously really pleased with this, and nods his head. And that's that as far as I can remember. An interesting dream. It had my heart going at some points. I really need to work on forcing myself to journal as soon as I wake from a dream. My recall is getting a little bit better but I know I could have so much more written in here. I'm getting close to lucidity, I think, I can feel it. I'm starting to critically think while in dreams.
I had two vivid dreams last night. When I first woke up, I recalled much more. But, I was forced to deal with real life almost instantly. My memory was reduced to only the very last segment of my last dream: I was standing with someone on a very rundown, overgrown, bridge. We were throwing explosives into a river about 15ft below. As we did, great white sharks the size of buses would spring out of the water to eat the explosives as they blew up! I remember their eyes rolling back into their heads in a somewhat comical way, but nevertheless, I felt extremely vulnerable like the bridge was about to collapse at any moment. I walked off the bridge, turned around to get a close look at it. I expected it to give way into the river, but it was stable. The weeds growing on it, and the cracked aged look was totally realistic.
Updated 03-16-2011 at 08:00 PM by 32174
Again I didn't have very good recall, I actually suspect that I had a few lucid moments but didn't maintain them very long. I'm driving a Lexus except it doesn't use normal controls it uses a Wiimote kind of thing. Some of my old school friends are there. Walter from fringe is in the car and comments about the heated seats at some point. We're traveling towards the yacht club in the town where I grew up. Instead we go to my house and I argue with my dad about being late. I try to find my own car to leave and can't find it. not sure if this is the same dream or a new one... Some girls that I knew from school are at the same house as above, the house and next door are busy undergoing alterations. We go inside... the dream fades I sky dive with some of my friends into carrington road from very low altitude. One friend opens his shoot too late but lands on it and he's fine. We pack our chutes hoping to find a place to base jump.
[PT] Sonhei que estava na casa de Rodrigo, jogando Twisted Metal. De repente, estávamos na rua, vendo carros de verdade se destruírem, como no jogo. Um deles era um grande carro amarelo, o outro era um pequeno carro laranja. Eles estavam batalhando batendo um contra o outro e usando martelos e marretas. O sonho não fez o menor sentido, e não me lembro mais do que isso. [EN] I dreamed I was in Rodrigo's house, playing Twisted Metal. Suddenly we were on the street, seeing real cars been destroyed, like in the game. One was a big yellow car, the other was a small orange car. They were battling against each other, using hammers. The dream made no sense, and I can not remember more than that.
[PT] Consegui induzir um sonho, mas acho que não foi completamente lúcido. Sonhei que estava na Long Library, do jogo Castlevania: Sympony of the Night. Fui pegar alguns livros, e eles estavam completamente vazios. Havia apenas a capa deles, e nenhuma página. Andei muito, e achei um exemplar de Brisingr, dividido em duas partes, de capa dura. Ainda estava dentro do plástico, o que significava que era novo. Fiquei muito feliz por ter achado o livro, embora a biblioteca fosse enorme, e eu ainda teria que andar muito... [EN] Could induce a dream, but it was not lucid. I dreamed I was in Long Library, a place of the game Castlevania: Sympony of the Night. I went to get some books, but they were completely empty. There was only the cover of them, and no pages. I walked a lot, and I found a copy of Brisingr, divided into two parts, hardbound. Was still inside the plastic, which meant it was new. I was very happy to have found this book, although the library was huge, and I still had to walk a lot ...
Just got up from this one... House shopping, with friends, deal fell through in my apartment or some such. At some kid's house, selling cages for lizards, along with the lizards. It feels like freshman year again, for a moment. This house is a mess, but we'll buy it and fix it ourselves, it's so cheap. Outside the kid's father is building a massive sculpture out of metal, beer and soda cans. Mom and this guy are talking on the porch, and the yard's muddy and our three dogs are outside going to the bathroom. I can see my little sister in the sun room, and the house is looking more and more like my parent's house. I take a second to reflect upon all this, the end of summer, the dogs... Wait. Two of those dogs are dead in real life. And I last woke up at 6:30. I reality check (not that I needed it by then) to confirm I'm dreaming. My sister wants to join me, but I still don't see the point of bringing people I know in real life with me on my escapades. I tell her to stay and draw, because things are about to get strange. The sky deepens to a rolling grey, and the backyard curves and stretches, bending upward such that I can see the forest slope into expansive, pristine wooded valleys. 'Bout 70% conifers. So I fly, and it's easier than ever. I push myself off the ground and pull myself higher. I'm not focused at all on the tactile of the flight, but on the unbelievable control I have, in these three dimensions. I take one last look at my house, with its muddy yard and mangled dead tree, my mother, my sister avidly sketching, and then I look forward, and ascend even higher, farther, until they're gone and I'm somewhere completely new. I want to know how high I can fly. I want to know if the scenery will remain realistic. I ascend to the edge of the atmosphere, deep, blue, glowing, curved. Then I dive, using the dive's momentum I level out with intense speed. Parallel flight, I reach a city. It's like my college town in that I feel welcome, among people who share similar values, but the people here are more willing to show how developed they are. There are no roads here. The clouds are dusty and cumulus now, golden-brown against a backdrop of glowing grey. I want to reach them, so I spire climb. I grab onto apartment buildings with my eyes, and fling myself around and past them (like a satellite breaking orbit), grabbing onto the next highest, and the next, building speed and confidence. Eventually I reach a clock tower, the highest building. I'm at the top, admiring the view, and a man grabs my ankle. He's on The Drug, can't leave The Drug, but is fine on The Drug and has a good honest job (he loathes) which pays for The Drug. I'm dreaming, so what will it do to me? I take a pill, yellow and blue, from this young blond, and feel the weight of my body. The scene becomes metallic, and there are people after us now, people belonging to this new place rather than the one I flew through. We must run, but I'm not sure if I'll take him with me. He won't move on his own. Construction noises goddommot.
But I found a new method which I shall try, discovered by MasterMind from Sweden. Writing a journal of your WAKING life, just before bed. I'm lazy, and a noisy typist, so I'll just go over the day in great detail in my head. Hope it works
(Let it be known that filling out a daily dream journal entry is starting to become a chore for me.) First one is more of a fragment. I go to my school (Once again, my school is NEVER as it is in real life in my dreams. Hell, the dream schools don't even have consistency.) to check on something, or get something, or something. Anyways, I'm going back out to my car to go home, when I pass through my English classroom to leave. (For some reason, it's always my English class featured in dreams...) I notice that all the students and the teachers are there. I continue towards the exit, when I look at the clock. From what I remember, the clock said six, but that seemed like a perfectly normal time for the students to be in class. I "surprisingly" asked what time it was, then coughed audibly on purpose as I left the class, to make them think I was sick. As I was walking outside later, I realize class shouldn't even be in session right now. Instead of going lucid, however, I simply buffawed at all the over-achievers. (Something very memorable: The class had a very high roof.) ----------- Second one is in the auditorium. We're having some Spanish-language presentation, for some reason. The lady is almost done with her first song (Or is it a man? I can't tell.) She moves on to the second song... Or story... Or whatever. I basically doze off, since I don't fucking speak Spanish, so it's pretty boring for me. I wake up at the end of the song, and find that all the Mexicans (Who, for some reason, were all sitting on the left half of the room) had turned white. Like, actual the color white. I thought there was a joke that I didn't get, and they all laughed so hard they turned white. But then I noticed they had all put on white clothes and painted their faces white. I noticed that a number of other people had put on yellow clothes and painted themselves yellow. It made sense to me that all the Spanish speaking people made themselves white due to some command from the presenter, and all the non-Spanish speakers had to dress in yellow. The dude (Mexican) sitting next to me pulled me up by a yellow string around my neck. I thought it was some sort of symbolic strangling, or the like. Anyways, that dies down after a while, even though I'm afraid I've offended people. I actually thought part of it was in English and I had simply missed out on parts while I was sleeping. However, one of my old friends from school, M, talks to another, A, and comments on how the entire thing was in Spanish and she couldn't understand a word. Another "A" friend is wearing a silk shirt which has down the middle button un-buttoned. Now, this A friend was always a little chubby, so it's kind of disturbing to see, especially considering he has chest hair in this dream. So I tell him to button it at least one more up. He does so, but, as he warned me, it looks even worse somehow. ------- I vaguely recall something about super-heros.
10/08/2009 Date With Criner All I can remember is a guy I work with who is a total misogynist being really sweet on what seemed to be a date. I remember being in his car and then getting out of the car to go somewhere and I left my shoes in the front seat. The car's a convertible but I feel safe that no one will take my shoes. Upon coming back to the car, I find that my shoes are in fact gone, but my cell phone and iPod are still there. Mike Boger's Uncle's House I'm driving somewhere in a wooded area with Mike Boger. (We've had a falling out recently over his choice of women he dates.) We drive to what looks like a dead end, but it's like a mountain of beautiful flowers! I tell him to stop so I can take a picture. It seems like he's still driving very very slowly to screw up my picture taking on purpose because none of my pictures are turning out right, they're all blurry. So I yell at him to damnit, stop the car! He stops the car and we get out. He says this is his uncle, the Duke of ____?___'s house. We approach the house on the side of the beautiful flower mountain and there are horses in a barn. They have flowers all over them, too. My pictures of them didn't turn out, either, because they were moving around too much. So Mike goes up a staircase into the house and I'm thinking, shouldn't he call first to let someone know he's there? (He is famous for showing up unexpectedly.) I follow him up the stairs to find another smaller white horse in the house. Someone comes around the corner and says I must be Mike's friend. He takes me into the living room where there are a couple of dogs and... another horse. I don't find it strange that there are these horses in the house, though. I look out the window and see a beautiful lake. It's crystal clear and the water is so blue. Mike suggests that we go sail in his boat. (This is so weird, he totally has a boat that I had forgotten about... but it's not a sailboat.) I tell him I have to go to the bathroom first. I go to the bathroom and there are floor to ceiling windows, but there are also sheer drapes covering them. I can see out the window through the drapes at his family chillin on the wraparound porch. I'm done going to the bathroom and I walk out to the porch. I'm looking out into the lake and I see two horses swimming and playing a game in the water. Upon closer inspection, they're dunking a yellow Nissan Xterra and another smaller car into the water. It will pop back up and they will dunk them again. They seem to be having a lot of fun with this. I find my friend from high school, Shelley, in another room. She's telling me to get my sunglasses and get ready to go to the boat. We walk out of the house and down a long walkway covered in like... I guess it's astroturf... the stuff on a miniature golf course. We get to the end and there's a dock for boats extending really far into this lake. I try to take more pictures. Then I wake up.
I had agreed to do the voice recording thing with Tobias. But the thing was, I wasn't here recording it over the net, I was there in Sweden xD He said "hey come over here, how about we record this one?". So I went and sat next to him and watched the video he had pointed out to me. I thought that it was a nice choice because it had both English and Swedish subtitles. Near the end the dialogue sounded like French or Italian, and so I got confused. I walked away from that, and for some reason I was looking to find something to take a photograph of for him. I was walking along, and I passed this woman. She was blond and looked like she was in her late 40s. She was one of those types that was wearing make up to try and look young, but I guess it somehow just enhanced her wrinkles. She was wearing medical nursing scrubs, but I think they were pink. So it looked like a pink tracksuit. She told me in plain English "If you want to get a job here, you should become a foster carer. There are plenty of jobs for that here." I have no idea how true this is lol. Firstly, even though she said foster carer, she meant a carer for old people, in nursing homes. Secondly, I thought to myself how I'd need to speak pretty good Swedish for that, because all the old people won't really be speaking much English (or so I assume). I came across this grassy field and there was a tall building with a slogan on its side. I thought that the slogan was pretty cool, but then when I noticed that it was an advertisement for Target I decided against taking a photo of it. It was an Australian ad. Maybe I was back in Australia? There was some part where I was in the city. The people were much unfriendlier there. There was another part with my brother. I think we were in Taiwan; there was some Chinese guy. Oh yeah, we boarded a train. Except this train was really weird, but really cool. It was like some sort of showground ride, but not intense at all. It would follow this weird track set, which would go on circles and twist and turn and stuff. It was awesome fun. There was a man that was pulling us along and twisting the route and stuff. He was doing it with a rope attached to a pulley that was attached to the train carriage. He was Chinese. I think I remember thinking to myself how dodgy this is. For some reason there were eggs, and I was trying to show my brother the eggs. It is too blurry for me to remember xP
10/07/2009 Captured! Funny, I don't remember being captured, but I sure am a captive. I can see a city in ruins because we're in the middle of a war. I don't know where I am, but I feel like I'm in Iraq. My captor is an Indian man who looks like the wedding planner from the movie "Monsoon Wedding." (I can't find a picture!) He's in love with me. I think we were making out. Next I'm in a house of some sort and I'm in a bedroom. But the door has one of the panels cut out of it so I can see what's going on outside. There are some people trying to break into the room next to mine, then they try to get into mine. It's a bunch of Indian kids! They're pissed off and have knives and are trying to cut me through the door! They're pushing on the door and I'm pushing back so they can't open it. They get it open just enough for a small black dog to come into my room. I'm ok with this. Then I turn around and find out I'm actually in a bathroom and I turn back around to the door and the kids are gone, instead there are people waiting in line to go to the bathroom. I turn around again and I see my friend from middle school, Chris Lennon, going to the bathroom or washing his hands, I can't tell which because his back is to me. He turns around and I see that he is actually a woman. I'm so floored by this, but I still remember I'm a captive so I tell him, I've been here for a month and a week, how did he get here?? Somehow I end up getting his phone number that he wrote on a piece of paper that read that his name is actually Christie. Mark's House Now I'm playing basketball in my old neighborhood in Illinois with my old neighbors Mark and Skip. This is strange because I never really played basketball with them and now they're being particularly nice to me. Mark starts to go home, so I follow him and he sits on his porch. I see his mom inside through the glass storm door. I open the door to say hey and she says to close it so I don't let the air conditioning out. I ask if I can come inside and she says yes. I ask if I should take my shoes off and she says no. I get inside and she says she's making waffles and pancakes for breakfast. I sit down but tell her that I hate waffles and pancakes (which I totally do!). When I look at my plate, though, I see pizza. So I start eating it. Everything's pretty normal and she asks me how long I've been back. I tell her only a couple of days. She asks what I'll be doing for work. I tell her that I work at Barnes and Noble and think for a minute. I tell her that I can't really fly back and forth and commute to work, so I'll probably just get transferred to a store here in Illinois. I was standing on the stairs as we're having this conversation, then I come downstairs and start playing with the dog. I feel really welcome here. Just good vibes.
10/06/2009 Doing Laundry I'm somewhere doing laundry. Andrea's throwing stuff at me from across the room to put into the washer. But she's throwing it all under the washer. Under the washer is like a flame you'd find on a gas stove. so all the clothes are burning up! I'm telling her to stop doing that, but she can't see that she's doing anything wrong. All of a sudden, my mom's on the other side of the room telling me what I'm doing wrong. I just keep telling her to shut the fuck up, but she keeps talking. I'm getting so so angry at her. So I leave and walk into a different room where I feel like I'm shopping. There are all sorts of backpacks (which I've actually been thinking about getting a new backpack because mine got some sand in it from going to the beach and now sand's getting all in my school stuff!) with like tropical patterns on them. I really just want a plain one and can't find one. Andrea shows me one that's got clear plastic sides and I tell her that won't do because I don't want everyone knowing what's in my bag(like what's in my bag that's so special anyway??!!!).
10/05/09 OK, so school, life, etc. happened. But I was in Spanish class the other day and someone mentioned having "one of those dreams where you wake up and go to the bathroom and go back to bed and then you really wake up." Yes, totally, a false awakening, right? Yeah, that's what it's called! So I realized I totally miss my DJ. Here's some catch up dreams: Lately I've had a few dreams where I've been really pissed off at my dad. In one dream, I recall he had something really hot and pressed it to my face and was burning me with it and I was screaming at him that he doesn't even know what he's doing!!! In other dreams I'm just frustrated and mad at him. Last night I dreamed I had a fight with my sister on the phone. She said she was moving to Quebec. I told her I don't believe her because she lies all the time (true), I can't trust her (true), and I wish I didn't get stuck with a shitty sister like her anyway (also true)!!! It felt so so good to get that off my chest, even if it was only in a dream. I had a lucid where I couldn't gain control and I just remember it being a strange situation so I just rolled back into normal dreaming. OK, here's a weird one: I'm in a pet store like digging hamsters or guinea pigs out of the dirt in the floor... but they're in habitats and they're really hungry because they've been underground for so long. I try to get them some food when I walk by a wall of aquariums of various exotic fish. They look prehistoric. One tank has the lid off and there's what appears to be a tiny shark spitting water at me!! Then I hear a voice overhead saying that the end of the world is coming and there's nothing I can do to stop it. I have some more dreams of being in the bathroom and people walking in on me as usual. I had one last night or the night before about being a bird... and having a bird buddy with me watching some other birds hunt for worms. We decided they were from the Philippines. Then one little bird who was hurt was looking for some worms and I felt like he was scared that the other birds would attack him. So my bird buddy and I went and scooped him up and brought him to safety. The little hurt bird thanked us and said we should smoke with him. So we started smoking what looked like some thorny stems of plants and I don't even know how we lit it but we were smoking it! (I love the uncomplicated nature of dreams sometimes!) Anyway, I've had some pretty bizarre dreams as you can tell, and I hope to get more into my DJ on a regular and get into have more memorable lucids! It's good to be back!!
3/26/2009 Lucid School have to actually *get* to school. more on this later: money at the cash register money on the floor lighters on the floor stupid boys magazines on T I'm sad I never went back to fill in this entry. I remember a little bit about it, but I don't know how I became lucid. I know I sometimes find money in my dreams and pick it up and put it in my pocket. I think I was finding money everywhere, and then I was selling magazines in a neighborhood. I really wish I could remember.
Monday night 3/16/09 I'm at a department store and it's like an audition to be in a commercial. There's a couple of racks of clothes and I have to pick out an outfit to audition in. The strange thing is, it's me and a bunch of little girls. None of the clothes look like they'll fit me. So I find some bigger clothes that look like they'll fit, but there are pinstripe pants and vests and shirts and nothing looks like I can make a decent outfit out of it. SO I do the best I can and take some clothes into the fitting room. I keep poking my head out and watching some of the other girls do their audition. When I'm in the fitting room, I am having the hardest time buttoning my shirt. I can hear the guy giving the auditions say that he's all done for the day and I stick my head out the door and tell him to wait for me! I still can't button my shirt. I wake up.
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