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A set of recurring bear dreams.


Mid October, 2017

I was in a variation on my aunt F and uncle C's house where a party was being held. There were so many strange and quirky characters there that it felt more like an indoor carnival. In one room I met a woman who was the caretaker of a semi-trained bear. People took turns meeting the bear, warily, before leaving, fully amused by their encounter. It was a black bear, small as bears go but still large enough to do some serious damage if it wanted to. It followed me around in particular and it kept resting its head in my lap every time I sat down. Each time I would feel a little on edge despite its outward displays of affection. I was worried about making the wrong move and setting off its wilder instincts. After the fourth or fifth time I started to even feel annoyed, not wanting to have to stay on my toes all the time. The caretaker woman seemed to sense my annoyance and she came up to me saying, “It is a great honor to be chosen by a bear.” I wandered out of the room, thoughtful, but not entirely convinced.

***

Thursday Night, 11/7/19

See "The Jaguar Woman" entry.

***

Tuesday Night, 6/30/20

I was someone else, a man in his 40's I think, outside at the edge of a forest as dusk was approaching. I morphed to resemble my waking self. I began climbing a large arbor for some reason, treating it like a jungle gym. While I was up there, I discovered a baby elephant hanging from its trunk in the arbor I was climbing. I stared at it for a while, confused by how it got up there. It changed into a bear cub. Das showed up. He thought the baby bear was cute and wanted to pet it indefinitely. I began to think about the implications, however, and I started looking around nervously for the mother. It appeared to be alone out here, but I was still wary.

"We shouldn't have put our scent on the cub." I told Das, "The mother will smell us and get angry if she's around."

Das shrugged. "I'm not worried. Look! He wants pets!"

I sighed and edged my way down the arbor. "Come on." I said, trying not to be too loud, "It's almost night time, we need to leave the forest now if we want to get clear of wherever the mother bear is at." I started creeping quietly away from the arbor and towards a sparser area of trees.

Das shrugged again but reluctantly stopped petting the cub and trailed along behind me.

I started to hear sounds in the bushes and a low rumble, and I realized the mother bear had arrived. For a moment I picked up the pace but continued to try to be as quiet as possible, hoping we might somehow get away before it finished locking onto our location. I searched my mind for what to do in case of a bear attack, and I remembered to play dead. The mother bear showed herself, blocking our path. I realized we weren't going to make it. The bear roared angrily and charged at us, knocking down Das first. Then she ripped into me (which didn't hurt as much as one would expect) and I got to see my intestines, right before my right eye was detached from its retina and everything went dark. I woke up. "Damn it Das..." I said out loud.

***

Thursday Night, 11/5/20

I'm talking with my parents outside on the deck when an adolescent black bear wanders into our back yard and we notice it has an abscess on the right side of its head. My mom wants to go over to it and treat it. I'm also worried about the bear's health, but I do not think it's a good idea to go up to it like that. I suggest maybe calling a wildlife center instead. "I have some leftover antibiotic ointment from when the cats were sick, I'll go get it!" My mom says and goes back into the house. My dad laughs at us and goes back inside to the other side of the house.

I follow my mom and try to get her to reconsider, but she doesn't listen to me. "Well, here it goes!" She starts heading back outside with the ointment.

"Mom, no!"

My mom jumps a little, startled. "Ah, you scared me!"

"You should be scared, it's a bear!" I look away for a moment, wondering about the wildlife center idea again, but when I look back I see that my mom is way out in the yard heading towards the bear.

For whatever reason I decide I have no choice but to do things my mom's way now. The least I can do is try to mitigate the danger so she doesn't get attacked... But this is probably a bad move. I head outside and my mom is scaring the bear towards the fence and towards me. I'm worried it will feel cornered. I backtrack a little and grab a bag of cat treats as it's the only thing I can get to quickly. I manage to get the bear's attention with the food, tossing a handful of treats on the ground in front of it to distract it. My mom comes up behind the bear with the ointment. The bear finishes the treats very quickly so I keep having to scramble to get handful after handful ready. I'm worried about the gaps of time where the bear might get aggressive. "When I say stop, stop until I can get more treats." I tell my mom, convinced the bear needs to be distracted with the process eating to not notice her. It's a dubious plan to begin with but I'm clinging to it.

My mom is applying the ointment to the bear, but I'm struggling to get the next set of treats out of the bag. The bear is slowly starting to look up. "Stop." I say. My mom does not stop. The bear looks directly at me with dark black eyes. "Stop, stop." I say again. Still no response from my mom. I imagine I can see impatience developing in the bear's expression, although it's hard to tell. "STOP!" I'm trying not to be too loud, but I'm starting to panic. I finally get the last of the treats out of the bag and toss them on the ground.

"Done!" My mom exclaims cheerfully.

"Mom, get inside, quick." I say anxiously. I make sure she makes it inside while the bear's still eating, then I go in myself and close the screen door first. Why am I bothering to close the screen door first? It's not going to stop a bear and I'm wasting time... I think and close the sliding glass door as quickly as I can. I can see the bear standing in the yard, eyeing the bag in my hand as if annoyed there are no more freebies.

***

Monday Night, 11/23/20

I'm in a building I don't recognize. My dad is there and says something very mean to me, although I can't remember exactly what it was or why it happened. Rather than feeling hurt or scared, I suddenly feel a deep anger come up as the full implication of the words sink in. "I am not stupid." I yell powerfully. My dad disappears but I yell it again. It seems to be irrelevant that no one is around anymore. I can see out a window onto the unfamiliar street outside. It's night time and raining a little. I still feel the anger, like a raw energy. I open my mouth and a bear's roar comes out, a guttural rumbling. I stop, confused at the ability to make such a sound and feeling self conscious, thinking people will think I'm weak for being too emotional and sounding ridiculous. Then I decide I don't care, even if anyone was around to hear. Twice more, I let out the bear's roar which resolves into a more human sounding scream. The dream fades.

Thursday, 8/6/20, Core2


False awakening. I heard my alarm going off but something made me suspect I was dreaming and that the alarm was just part of the dream so I didn't hurry to turn it off. I was laying in bed and not moving easily. A finger count reality check confirmed I had too many fingers but for some reason I still wasn't 100% certain I was really dreaming. I thought about rolling "out of my body" and flying but I was reluctant to fling myself out of bed if I turned out to be awake (it's not close to the floor). What can I do that would be easier? I wondered. I tried to affect my environment. The sound of the alarm faded in and out with my focused thought, then I made it go silent. The entire visual of my room faded as well. Oops. I rolled out of bed and floated to the floor, having now convinced myself I was in a dream and that I needed to stabilize it.

A lapse in consciousness as everything faded to black briefly. I found myself standing in the upstairs bathroom. Wait a minute, I thought after a few seconds, How did I get here? Am I still dreaming? I counted my fingers; seven, eight. It was very strange because my hands looked so normal even when I stared directly at them. I checked a couple more times just to convince myself once again. I was looking around me in amazement because everything was so realistic, an exact replica of my waking life bathroom. Clearer, even. I stared at and felt the bumps on the wall, saw how light reflected off the semi gloss, mint green paint. I decided to go downstairs to look around some more. I hope I'm not just awake and really sleep deprived. I thought idly, Otherwise people are going to think I've really lost it, staring at the walls and talking about how amazing they are.

As I walked down the stairs, I pulled at my hand, trying to see if I could morph it. I did, slightly. The weighting of gravity felt so realistic as well that I wondered if I would be able to fly in this dream since it felt like it would be difficult. I tested it by jumping off a few stairs and confirmed I could float. It felt stranger than usual in this environment. I reached the kitchen where my mom was doing dishes. "Hey Mom," I said, "This is a dream."

"Oh, yeah?" she said.

"Yeah." I thought of what I wanted to do with my lucidity. "Do you want me to show you how to fly?" I asked her.

"No that's okay, I already know how to do that. I've done enough of that lately." She went back to doing dishes. I was somewhat mystified by this decision.

"Oh, okay." I wanted to go out back so I started looking around for the nearest exit. I went and opened the front door. "Well, see you later." I added. Wait, why am I looking for a door to go all the way around? I could just take a straight shot through the kitchen wall. I changed course and flew at the wall. I can't believe some people get stuck in walls, it's never happened to me. All you have to do is not think about it. So then, of course, it happened to me. I got stuck in the wall halfway through. It felt like I was moving through molasses and everything went dark for a couple seconds. Then I could see an extremely vague back yard scene. I focused on a point relatively far away - since the closer focal points weren't yielding results - and I set a strong intention to go there directly. I essentially teleported to the intended spot and the scene became vivid and clear once again.

I flew above my yard, which was roughly accurate to waking life but much bigger. I spotted my late cat Pascal, a fluffy, 24-pound Maine Coon, laying in the yard just past the redwood tree. He was staring up at me. I flew lower and slowed, with a bit of difficulty controlling my height and speed initially. "I don't regret any of it!" I announced to him out of nowhere once I landed in front of him. "Well, except I wish we'd realized how sick you were sooner so you didn't have to go like that. We wanted to be there." I knelt down next to my cat and pet him, talking to him about our time together when he was alive, telling him how much I loved him, and pulling twigs and leaves out of his fur. He just continued staring at me with big eyes and purring, though I got the sense he was listening. The dream lapsed into a non-lucid.

Spoiler for Additional Notes:

Definitely one of my clearest LDs, and a really euphoric feeling to see Pascal again. I loved that cat so much. When he was old and sick, he started having trouble breathing and we rushed him to the vet and said yes when they asked if we wanted them to do a procedure to try to save him. He died on the operating table and I really regretted not being with him at the end. In hindsight we didn't recognize how close he was to going so we weren't prepared to let him go and also didn't have time to think it through fully during the emergency. I was determined not to repeat that mistake, and I didn't the next time one of our elderly cats, Talis, no longer had quality of life. It was very tough to make that decision and to find the right balance, but I know that in that case Talis' needs came first. Anyway, it was still good to finally get to tell Pascal how I felt and how much I loved him, even if it was just in a dream.

Saturday Night, 7/18/20

I had an FA. I noticed that the perspective was wrong for waking up; I was looking down on my bed. I floated around the room a bit, confirming I was dreaming. I noticed the room was vague and the dream did not feel very stable. I aimed for the floor of my room and landed, bounced up and down a little trying to feel the carpet on the soles of my feet. I could hear a soft crunching sound, like the sound of velvet being gently crushed. The dream faded anyway, my vision going black. However, I still felt more connected to the dream than to my waking life body so I tried to imagine "throwing" myself back into the dream. I opened my eyes, a bit uncertain whether it would work, but it did. I was back in my room standing on the ground. I floated again to confirm. Up near the ceiling I grabbed onto the top of the cube structure where there was a wooden platform (it's sort of like the top of a bookcase). I alternated between staring at the wood grain and rubbing my hand across the wood. Sure enough the grains of the wood became incredibly detailed and lifelike. Looking around I could now see the lines on the palms of my hands, the bumps on the blue walls, the sharp outlines of various pieces of furniture.

Satisfied that the dream was fully stabilized, I phased through the window of my room and glided over the land below. It was quite beautiful out, sunrise coloring the clouds. Although my backyard was much bigger than in waking life it was otherwise consistent with its current configuration. At least up until the stand of bamboo at the far end. Behind there and off to the right, instead of a fence, I found an open plot of dirt with a partially built lighthouse. At last! I thought, Although, I was kind of hoping to have it by an ocean... I considered that on the one hand it was convenient to have it close to my house but on the other hand I would have to use some trick of the mind in order to make use of it as I'd originally planned, as a lighthouse by the sea.

Off to my left a woman and two young children were wandering from the bamboo forest into my backyard. I waved at the family. The youngest child, the boy, seemed to be the only one who saw me. He tried to get his mother and sister to look over. The mother squinted in my general direction and shrugged before continuing on her way. The little boy looked confused. I told him not to worry about it. It wasn't clear if he could hear me. I returned my attention to the lighthouse and saw that the first floor was thoroughly encased in rock and therefore inaccessible. I had planned to have steps carved into rock leading up to the base of the building and I mused that the dream must have constructed it this way like a bug in a video game when it was placed somewhere different from the intended landscape. The next two floors were far smaller than I'd planned. Beyond that it was completely unfinished. I began planning how I would fix it and build it out as if I were using Minecraft blocks. I wondered if I should leave it with its current black and white colors or change them to match the colors I'd planned for it when I designed it in waking life. I had only just begun modifying the structure when I heard a loud sound. Annoyed, I looked up to see that some random guy on a motorcycle had ridden up and parked behind the lighthouse, apparently oblivious to my presence. When I saw that he wasn't going to interfere further I tried to return my concentration to the task at hand but the dream faded into a different scene and I lapsed into non-lucidity.

Spoiler for Additional Notes:

Made progress on two of my LD goals: creating a lighthouse and experimenting with dream cartography. The lighthouse is a place I designed in waking life that I had never encountered in a dream before. Basically I was trying to incubate it by creating drawings, written pieces, and even a design in Minecraft creative mode (which is no doubt why I ended up modifying it with Minecraft blocks in this dream). This was my first success in finding/creating the lighthouse in an LD, although I'd come across a version of it briefly in a non lucid once. I'd originally planned to build it from scratch near a particular recurring beach location. Instead I found it partially constructed... in my backyard. I didn't actively work to recall my waking life goal during the LD as I usually would, instead I just explored and found what I needed quickly. That makes this my first successful LD incubation attempt, as well.

Additionally, I've been wanting to not only map out my recurring dream locations but to experiment with creating new ones and testing their level of permanence and the permanence of the connections between dream locations. Behind the bamboo in my backyard happens to be one spot I'd considered using for experimentation as I'd rarely gone into the bamboo area in dreams and never off to the right. Apparently my subconscious decided to combine two ideas and gave me a partial lighthouse in that spot. I think I'll just find some way to work with this development. Maybe I'll use the lighthouse like a TARDIS lol.

Another side note: When I was very young my dad started building a wooden playhouse in the backyard and never finished it (eventually we took it down). This seems to be a symbolic reference to that, although I'm not sure why.

non-dream dream lucid

I slept a LOT today. I could literally explain my entire day in detail here.

I entered the day in what seemed to be a black void. Well not really. I'd fallen asleep at my computer and when I woke up everything was black. When I uncovered myself everything was still black. Silent as well. The power was out and all the lights were off.

I went to the living room up stairs and started listening to my radio. An hour later I did the unthinkable and went back down into the black void known as the basement cause my antenna is down there! I spent half an hour down there before coming back up and laying down, still listening to the radio.

Ended up experimenting, practicing SSILD cycles with the radio on Didn't work out so well. Actually managed to get numb in some spots but it just didn't happen other wise.

Ended up listening to the radio all the way until 7 or so, when the power came back on.

Turned on my laptop and came here to just see what was up. Then came to the question of whether to WBTB or not. I ultimately decided to, so I started my clock and went to bed.

Ended up waking up an hour before the alarm, so I thought "good enough" and went back to sleep, practicing SSILD cycles as I drifted off.

And here's where the fun begins.

-------------------------------
The PILD
Lucid: yes
TGMG: potentially, but ultimately no.

I am in my living room, playing an NES game. It looks like Mario but the levels are nothing like I've ever seen before. I have a few false awakenings before I realize something is up. So of course I get up and my room is more or less the same as IWL. I then walk out the door and into the back yard. And this is where things get different.

I look at the area where the shed was and it's a rather large ruin of a shed that was painted white. I look around and there's a bunch of wood everywhere. I look down and there's a piece of wood in the ground that sounds like there could be something under it. I start to pull it up and I see a bunch of duffel bags in the hole. I climb in and I pull the duffel bags out of the hole, but the wood falls on the hole and there's a bunch of spiders on the wood.

I just look out of the hole, occasionally grabbing the dirt in the opening before I stop caring and just push the wood away. I carry the duffel bags inside and I open them up to find a bunch of old clothes. They're all completely dry and they even smell decent. Among the clothes I also find a bunch of old school stuff - binders and whatnot. I open those up to find orange text from when I was a log younger.

I put it away and I then find a bunch of gameboy games and SD cards. I look at the gameboy games. Lots of black cartridges that I have no clue what games are on them.

The SD cards are also black. I grab them all and start stacking them. "Damn that's a lot of SD cards! Look how tall this stack is!" I don't remember how tall the stack was.

I have another false awakening.

I'm back playing the Mario game again! I'm in a very dark level. Well the background is completely black. There's brown Mario styled bricks on the ground and ceiling. I'm also listening to the sound. Sounds like a Mario game except its in stereo oddly enough.

I continue running down this corridor until eventually the game starts acting weird. The audio goes mono and becomes a bit watery sounding. The graphics also change as the bricks become round stones and Mario becomes Fire peach.

Ah ha! This must be a dream! I immediately become lucid, and realize that I'm playing this on my laptop. I get off and get up. I take care not to destabilize the dream. I look around, looking at how real everything looks.

The house is more or less the same as in real life except some of the lighting is different. This is more apparent in the kitchen.

Timmy comes towards me as I'm looking around and asks me whats up. I tell him "I'm dreaming!" and open the front door. I then open the real front door with telekinesis apparently (It was just open).

Timmy asks me what I'm gonna do, and I tell him I'm going out side. I look out the door, stabilizing the dream. I then walk outside. I start to think "Well I'm dreaming! So what goals do you want to try and do?". I try and remember my lucid list but the only goal I can remember is the one where I shrink myself.

By this time I'm on the outside porch, (more or less identical to IWL) and I look around. Everything is quite icy, but I don't feel cold. I raise my hands in the air and look up. I then shrink to about a quarter my size.
Well that's one goal done. No bonus points cause all you did was run to the corner store

I run off the porch and into the road. The road is quite icy. My brother starts following me as I get to the corner. I look down ecorse rd and I see it's a lot darker than IWL. More houses, and it seems to end in a straight turn to the right. The store down the svc drive looks more or less the same as it does IWL. I continue to walk down, looking down every street that I can.

I eventually get to where the chicken place is, and I walk inside. This place is pretty much the same as IWL as well. I look around and there's a bunch of food on the back counter. I want to eat some but I think "What if I'm not dreaming?" so I run out.

All of a sudden I walk up in my bed. I had a false awakening. I get up and everything is blueish. It almost feels as if someone else is in the room but I don't know it. I get up and float across the living room. I say "Jesus christ!", and then I plug my nose. Only to find out I can still breath when it's plugged. "okay this is a dream you don't need to be saying that".

This next part is a bit of a blur. I definitely lost lucidity.

I walk into this room that looks like something out of Half Life 2 and metal gear solid put together. There's a DC in there explaining the SD cards to me. He says that someone made the SD cards work like that intentionally to put you to sleep. They don't explain why though. I do learn how it works however. Each SD card has a few DOS games on it as well as a batch file to load them. If you load the games without any batch file, it puts you to sleep, but you don't realize you've gone to sleep. Some of the SD cards, particularly the one I was playing, with Mario, had the batch file tampered with so it acts as if it's not a batch file.

I have this huge blue monitor to the left of me, and a tunnel that you could crawl through? in front.

I am then playing this Sonic game where I'm being bounced all over the place with flippers in what seems to be a futuristic setting. Then I'm in a spindash tunnel. I get stuck in it, but I want to go another way so somehow I make my way back up, and I get myself into a launcher and try to get up the top tunnel. It takes a few tries. I don't remember what's on top.

I wake up some time around here.
I recall it's now around 11 or so.

After this I'm incredibly tired, so I end up writing down a lot of things about the dream (go tired me ). I really hesitate though because of just how tired I am. I make lots of mistakes as well.

Well eventually I end up going to sleep again where I had another dream.

-----------------------
The windy forest
Lucid: no
TGMG: no

It's during the day time and I'm on a long road in the middle of the forest. No clue where this is but I do know it is quite windy, but not cold.

There's no cars on the road and I never see any. I look up and the sky is overcast but it is quite bright out. Eventually the wind is so strong that I get picked up off my feet, and into the woods. I see a bunch of trees where I'm going, with water on the bottom. Obviously a swamp.

I get close enough to a rather large tree and I grab on. It's too large for me to wrap my arms around but I am capable of holding on. As I'm holding on I get my first glimpse of the area. It's a swamp, with lots of large trees like the one I'm on.

I start climbing up the tree until I get to a large branch. I climb on and sit down. Now I look around fully and I see a swing-like thing made out of tree trunks. There's also a bear laying down on it!

I watch it for a moment. The bear is swinging back and forth on the branch.

I look up the tree and I see a yellow rope laying down. I look up to where it's coming from and I see an incomplete bridge. It's made of wood and there's a odd black thing coming off the incomplete end. I grab the rope and start climbing up it.

As I'm climbing I realize that I don't need much grip to stay on. I could get away with just holding it in my fingers and it would be fine.

I eventually climb to a branch really close to the bridge. I grab hold of the bridge and I see it swaying back and forth. I then see a DC on the bridge. A female park ranger? They take the rope and throw it to me from the bridge. I climb on and I then see a toolbox the DC has. They're here to fix a bit of the bridge.

They ask for help, and I start helping them. So they go into their toolbox and start grabbing small screws. Really really small. They then start screwing them into random bits of wood.

They ask me to do the same so I get a screw and put it into the side of one board on the wall. I can't get it in though! So I try and get it in again. This time it works.

By now its night time, so the DC thanks me and leaves. I'm alone now so I just get up and walk the path beyond the bridge. I then wake up.


Once I wake up I'm still really tired.
Over the course of writing this DJ, I fully awoke and now I feel fine.

Spoiler for Temp stuff:

long dream:
I go to sleep around 8 or so? Wake up around 12 or so.

false awakenings, metal gear solid

the first RC was to check the audio of the NES game. Normally it would sound fine enough, but once dreaming the audio would get really watery and lose its connection with the game. Also the graphics would get really wierd. The bricks would turn into little 8 bit stones and Mario would go all inverted.

wake up quite a few times (FAs) > realize they were all dreams > notice that some of them have you playing a NES game >


FAs > eventually go into the back yard > find shed loads of SD cards and binders amongst the old fort > bring them all in > open them and find a bunch of old clothes, all perfectly fine, as well as old school paper work > notice that the FAs have you playing nes games >

fort:
go into back yard (lighting is evening, but rather bright) > find a rather large wooden fort > go around and look inside the fort > eventualy find a wooden board in the ground > pull it up > find a bunch of duffel bags > find yourself trapped amongs wooden boards with large spiders > eventually come out > bring loot inside > look inside > find a bunch of old binders with school stuff, and SD cards and gameboy games > look at all the gameboy games > find a DOS emulator on each one > realize that the old SD card started the emulator without any batch file > starting without batch file causes some sort of explosion > puts you to sleep without realizing it


lucid route: find yourself playing a nes game agian > play it for a while before noticing that everything's starting going wierd > notice that it's a dream > pull back and notice it's on your laptop in your living room > find timmy > tell him that I'm dreaming > look around at how real everything looks > open up the front door > look out the door to stabilize scenery > walk out door while thinking about lucid list > shout "increase clarity" on the front porch > think of a goal "change sizes" > raise my arms and I shrink to a quarter my height > timmy walks out > I run down the path and into the road > road is all iced up > look down ecorse rd > look down the service drive > walk to the corner stores > go into the chicken place > there's loads of food in there > I don't eat it, thinking "welll what if I'm not sleeping?" > false awakening > wake up in the living room > it's dark but there's almost a surreal lighting > I get scared for a second > say "jesus christ" > I nose pinch > become lucid again > walk towards the front door > ???



------------------------------------------------


I am playing a NES game, seems to be a Mario game. Black background, brown bricks on the top and bottom. I'm just running forward. The sound is there but it's very watery. I play for a bit, before having a false awakening. I am back at the beginning of the game! This repeats a few times before you realize what's going on.

I sit there thinking "Why do I keep resetting back to the beginning?", before realizing that it could be a dream. Okay, I think "Next time I reset back to the beginning, I'll reality check!". I continue playing the game for a bit, carefully paying attention to how the game is behaving. At one point, the game audio starts getting less clear, almost watery. I also seem to recall that its in stereo normally and it became mono. Also the 8 bit graphics changed. Mario turned into "Fire peach" for no reason and the bricks changed into stones.

Ah ha! This must be a dream! I immediately become lucid, and realize that I'm playing this on my laptop. I get off and get up. I take care not to destabilize the dream. I look around, looking at how real everything looks.

The house is more or less the same as in real life except some of the lighting is different. This is more apparent in the kitchen.

Timmy comes towards me as I'm looking around and asks me whats up. I tell him "I'm dreaming!" and open the front door. I then open the real front door with telekinesis apparently (It was just open).

Timmy asks me what I'm gonna do, and I tell him I'm going out side. I look out the door, stabilizing the dream. I then walk outside. I start to think "Well I'm dreaming! So what goals do you want to try and do?". I try and remember my lucid list but the only goal I could remember was the one where I shrink myself.

By this time I'm on the outside porch, (more or less identical to IWL) and I look around. Everything is quite icy, but I don't feel cold. I raise my hands in the air and look up. I then shrink to about a quarter my size.

I run off the porch and into the road. The road is quite icy. My brother starts following me as I get to the corner. I look down ecorse rd and I see it's a lot darker than IWL. More houses, and it seems to end in a straight turn to the right. The store down the svc drive looks more or less the same as it does IWL. I continue to walk down, looking down every street that I can.

I eventually get to where the chicken place is, and I walk inside. This place is pretty much the same as IWL as well. I look around and there's a bunch of food on the back counter. I want to eat some but I think "What if I'm not dreaming?" :derp: so I run out.

All of a sudden I walke up in my bed. I had a false awakening. I get up and everything is blueish. It almost feels as if someone else is in the room but I don't know it. I get up and float across the living room. I say "Jesus christ!", and then I plug my nose. Only to find out I can still breath when it's plugged. "okay this is a dream you don't need to be saying that".

This next part is a bit of a blur. I deffinitely lost lucidity.

I walk into this room that looks like something out of Half Life 2 and metal gear solid put together. There's a DC in there explaining the SD cards to me. He says that someone made the SD cards work like that intentionally to put you to sleep. They don't explain why though. I have this huge blue monitor to the left of me, and a tunnel that you could crawl through? in front.

I am then playing this Sonic game where I'm being bounced all over the place with flippers. Then I'm in a spindash tunnel. I get stuck in it, but I want to go another way so somehow I make my way back up, and I get myself into a launcher and try to get up the top tunnel. It takes a few tries. I don't remember what's on top.

I wake up some time around here.

forest dream:
I'm running down a long curving road during the day, and there's serious wind. Forests surround me, and the wind is strong enough to pick me up and blow me towards a swamp. As I'm getting carried I try and grab hold of several branches, and I eventually succeed. There's lots of rather large trees here.

There's a large swing-like contraption here, made of several large tree trunks, with what seems to be a bear on it. It's just going back and forth. I grip the trees here, and I eventually climb up one of them until I get to a large branch sticking out to the left. Once I get on the branch I start looking around more.

There's water below me and there's what seems to be a rope here. I grab it and I look up to where it came from. There's a bridge here. Well it doesn't seem to be finished but it is here. Rather new as well. I climb up to it with the rope and the bridge is swaying quite a bit.

Once I'm on the bridge I start looking around and a DC comes up and greets me. They ask me what I'm doing here, and I don't really tell them much. Then they bring out a tool box and start getting out small screws to put in the bridge. They ask for my help. So I get a screw and try and screw it into one of the boards on the fences.

It doesn't go in, so I try and put it down. They grab the screw from me and put it where the other screws are. They give me another screw to put in, and I finally screw it in. I do this a few times until the DC thanks me and leaves. I then walk along the path that the bridge leads to, and then I wake up.

non-dream dream lucid

Stayed up a long time again due to Desert Bus for Hope. (Damn they have a nice stream layout this year and I've seen some awesome stream layouts.)

I started up my WBTB clock (goes off 4 hours after its started up regardless of when its started up) and went to sleep.

Woke up once, 2 hours before the clock, and immediately went back to sleep, woke up again 4 mins before the alarm and closed it.

I then practiced SSILD cycles, and went back to sleep.

----
I recall jumping in between falling shipping containers. I then recall gliding down a curved rail that almost looks like a spring.
I am then on a menu where OverTheGun is talking about saving the birds or something like that.
I am looking through a container with a glass window.

Eventually I'm in my back yard, the game having ended. It's very similar to IWL except the house is longer and there's more trees. Everything's also very blue strangely enough.

I'm here with the DCs from the ending of the game, sitting in a ditch. There's a bunch of kittens here.
I am talking to one DC, and then I start getting aware.
I start looking around almost immediately.
I then realize I'm dreaming, and I continue to look around for a bit, looking at how real everything looks. I feel the grass and I hear what it sounds like. I then say "I'm dreaming". I then realize that I'm probably about to wake up soon, so I tell the DCs that I'm about to wake up.

Everything starts getting really blurry, and I get pulled out of the dream. I then feel myself in my bed.

"Don't move! You can still continue! Just think about the dream lightly!"
I lay there for a few seconds, before a DEILD begins.

I'm in my basement after the DEILD, and I look around.
My mom is there, and I yell "I'M DREAMING!" right out of the Stanley parable.

My mom comes over and asks what's up, and i tell her "I'm dreaming right now". She starts hugging me and telling me "You're alright!". I feel the dream start to destabilize.

I tell her "The dream is destabilizing!" and I start rubbing my hands together. I can feel my hands rubbing together bug it feels very blurry as well.

It comes back but its slow. I then get up and look around, and everything looks crystal clear. The basement is much larger than IWL and there's more wood than normal. Most of my vision is taken up by mom though, oddly enough. I ask her "What is the best dream stabilization technique for me?". She doesn't talk, but instead she just grabs me by the nose and pulls me forward towards the steps.

We start walking up the steps and I recall the other LD where I woke up walking up the steps. I start thinking "This is bad shit, don't go up there!" but by doing this the dream is destroyed and I wake up.

I DEILD again.

I open my eyes in my kitchen, on a bed. Already strange as obviously there isn't a bed hovering in my kitchen IWL, and even if there was, you wouldn't want to sleep there.

I look around and everything is blurry but I notice that the walls of the kitchen are of the same siding that the living room is made out of. It's very dark brown. I get up and do a nose pinch RC, and I can breath through, noticing the same effect from the last LD. Interestingly I don't slip while doing it as well.

I then walk into the living room. Most of the stuff from IWL is here except it has a Victorian style. I look around again and everything is blurry, but I notice that if I stair at the same scene for more than a few seconds, that it becomes crystal clear. Clearer than IWL.

I walk into the hallway, and I look around again.
It's almost identical to the hallway IWL. There's a vacuum cleaner in the corner, and the white shelf from IWL isn't there. I walk towards the bathroom door, but I don't open it.

I notice a towel on the vacuum cleaner, and I look at it. I look at how real it is. I can look at every single thread on the towel with surprising accuracy.

I start walking towards the end of the hallway where the steps are, and everything feels completely real. To the point where the omnipresent dream feeling goes away and I have to actually verbally remind myself that I'm dreaming.

I then say "This is why you don't just become lucid from any random dream, THIS. Look how friggin real everything looks!". I look at the gate that blocks off the stairs (not that I was planning to go down them). I then turn around and walk back to the living room where everything fades and I wake up again.

I start doing DEILD again but I can feel my breathing this time. I then think about it for a bit before deciding to just get up.

I then start writing this down.

Spoiler for Temp:

temporary things:

I only remember fragments of this dream. I don't remember how they fit together.

running down a metal spring > standing beside a storage container > standing in the night > OTG switching character > end up beating the game. Apparently the end of the game is set in my back yard lol.


---------
I am in the back yard and everything is all blue, all of a sudden I become more aware, and then I realize I'm dreaming, just because the environment I know isn't part of real life. The DCs from the dream are here. I don't even remember their names except that a few were kittens.

I just kinda lay in a ditch in the back yard (which isn't here iwl) and I can feel the grass. Then the dream starts to fade, and I'm in my bed.

"Don't move! You can still enter a dream!"
I wait for a few seconds and eventually a dream begins.


I'm in a bed. I'm in my kitchen oddly, I get up. I think "yeah these aren't a part of my kitchen. Just to confirm I nose pinched. Everything around me looked completely real, completely immersive. However, moving around into unfamiliar places made my vision blurry. Looking at a scene for only a few seconds made everything crystal clear.
I'm not sure if this is how it works, or if I was supposed to be like this in the dream.

I walk into my hallway.
There's what looks to be a vacuum cleaner with a green towel on it. I look at the green towel and I can see every cloth on the towel. I then look back into the living room, but it's blurry so I turn back to the hallway.

I walk towards the steps, and the gate is closed. I look around again and everything feels completely real.

"You see, this is why you don't just become lucid from dream scenes, THIS."
I then notice that the omnipresent dreamy feeling kinda fades away at this point, and I actually have to remind myself that it's a dream.

I wasn't here to go down the stairs, so I turned around back into my living room when the dream destabilizes, and I'm back in my bed. The dream exited more forcefully and I can feel myself breathing.


I decide not to have another DEILD, and I get up.

I'm in this huge one story house, theirs a countless numbers of other house guests here with me. All of them are rude snotty bitches, but this one girl with dark brown hair is cool. We both go out to the backyard under this wooden gazebo thing. There's this other little building on the other side of the back yard with a sliding glass door. She goes into it, and talks to me through the glass. She puts her hair in weird rubber bands, and says she gonna cut it because the bitches will steal it in her sleep so she wants to burn it. She goes out of view from me, then comes out with tall broom hair and the side shaved and now all of a sudden she looks Samoan or Hawaiian or something. I ask her why she didn't cut it shorter and she says that that doesn't apply anymore to her. So we both walk back into the house and everyone questions who she is like they don't recognize her, and she loves it and refuses to tell them.

My first dream last night started out in my back yard. I was holding a radio box about the size of a small T.V.- This dream had to do with the fact that in real life, I registered myself for manditory drafting not too long ago. (Even though even if I am ever to be drafted, I can't ever join the military because of my eye disorder)

A transmition came through from the U.S. military informing me that a platoon was in route to my house, and I was ordered to read aloud one of my fictional short stories to them. I pushed the communication button and replied, "Uhm... no, I'm not in the military. I'm not gonna do that."

Right after that, all these transmitions poored in about my federal arrest. Like as if I had just commited treason against the U.S.- they told me the platoon was now on their way to take me in for dissobeying a direct order. I began to panic and went inside my house to tell my wife. I told her and then ran outside to tell my parents, they had just pulled up and gotten out of their car. I hollered at them and told them what was going on, they didn't seem to think it was that big of a deal. My mom pointed out the obvious, that I can't even join the military because of my eye disorder and I ran back inside to say goodbye to my wife. I had no idea how long they intended on taking me. The group of soldiers walked into my yard and began to talk with my parents. I expected the worst. I thought to myself, these guys are probably going to treat me like shit because they think I'm a traitor.
My parents requested they be informed of what goes on in my case and where I'm going to be put. I sarcastically added "And I request the least amount of bloodshed from hazing on the way there, I'll be right back."
I had to go pee, and I didn't want to have to go pee while being taken captive. Who knows when I'd get to a restroom. I went in the bathroom... and was to nervous to go. So I kissed my wife, and let the soldiers take me. The next scene was me, somehow transformed into a video game with the rest of that platoon. We were all lions on a two deminsional screen, playing some sort of game on a football field. That game fucking hurt! Seriously, they kept clipping my sides and I could feel the sting. I could tell they didn't like me. I just had to keep pushing my way through. After a while of that, the dream back up back into a personal point of view and I was standing next to a software engineer. I said, "What the hell was that? I didn't understand one bit of what was going on in there."
He told me that this was a new military software that was testing my psyche, I had to play the game like usual. He told me how to play, I don't remember how but then I understood what was going on, so I went back in as a lion. Somehow, I got a team mate this time. My wife's dad, Mike. We kicked their ass this time. I must say, Mike makes a good lion. I can totally see it.

After that I was released, my charges were dropped. That's the end.