All DJ Entries

Okay, seems like I'm finally getting a hang of DILD.
After I wrote a wall of text yesterday in the IOSDP thread, I realized that DILD is actually something you can consciously control. It's almost the same as incubating a dream for me.
In a way, my technique works by incubating certain things that make me realize I'm dreaming.

During the next few days I'm going to write down the things that seem to work and the things that don't work so far. Maybe I can really narrow down the key elements to become a self-made natural.

Last night I woke up randomly during the night and decided to fuck my emotions and motivation and just take action.
So I fell asleep while trying to manipulate the dream again so I'd get lucid.

The first dream right after falling asleep was lucid. It was very short though, as it was a nightmare and for some reason I couldn't keep my focus up.

1st: I was in some weird room. For some reason I immediately knew I was dreaming. Right as I got awareness, some kind fo creepy creature appeared. It was a nightmare. I felt intense fear and tried to suppress it. It worked for a short period of time and the monster disappeared. But then the fear got even stronger and I just woke up. About 10 minutes have passed IRL.

After that I had some trouble falling asleep and it was extremely hot in my room. I fell asleep thinking about my girlfriend...

2nd: I was in some kind of factory. This time I wasn't actually 'in the dream' but I was observing something. This also prevented me from getting lucid. I was watching a tournament. There was a sumo-fighter battling against a Muai-Thai fighter. The second fighter looked like the skin for Lee Sin from League of Legends.
The MT-guy punched and kicked the sumo guy but he was so protected by his fat the nothing worked. Suddenly the MT guy kicked him so strongly that he almost fell out of the arena. I could passively notice how the arena would change all the time. They would fight on some stairs, a wooden log, some metal pipes or in the arena.
Then the MT guy charged towards the sumo guy but he intercepted him, grabbed his neck and his body and threw him on the ground. Now the sumo guy grabbed him and began rolling around the arena with him. They both looked like a wheel and the sumo guy crushed him under his weight.
I then told my friend on facebook to watch this show. I sent him a link to some youtube video.
I woke up.

Interpretation: Memories of some videos I've watched about sumo-fighters and also the Lee Sin skin from LoL. The fight looked pretty badass, though.
Seems like I need to manipulate the next dreams so I don't go into 'observer' mode. I need to be participating in my dreams or I can't get lucid.

I was with two friends of mine (R/A) at a place.
I believe it's a place in the woods near an old football field at my home town when I was a kid. It doesn't exists anymore.
The conversation is getting more and more scientific. My friend A is using a tree leaf laid on the ground to prove some point of view.
I'm getting pissed because they're just ignoring me.
The scenario changes and I'm with a girl friend of mine (AV) hanging in some stairs.
Then a girl appears.
She's brunette with big eyes and long hairs. her face is blurry. She's wearing shorts.
We started flirting instantly. I'm getting fascinated by her.
(I know that this dream is much bigger. From now on there's A LOT of fragments I can't remember.) I'm at her house. Se has one younger and one older brother. Her father is there too.
They don't really like me.
I'm cooking for them now.
I know I spent a lot of time with her. We talked for ages.
It's raining a lot.
I live at the end of the street.
My mom, dad and some person I don't remember are sleeping there. They spent a lot of time at the Hospital for some reason I don't know.
I woke them and offered some bread and soup I made. They were really happy.

Blurry Award Night
I was at this really weird open air place at night. It so hard to describe.
An old acquaintance of mine (M.P) arrived and out of nowhere he started giving awards (!).
There was other people there. A friend of mine was there and started talking to me about being unemployed. He then told a joke and everyone laughed.

Weeding Party
I was at what looked like a wedding party at open air. Empty tables, lots of grass. It was really beautiful.
My mom and an aunt (A.) were there. They were cooking something we call russian salad.
I ask them why they're cooking since the party was already over! Apparently cooking the leftovers is the only way for the owners to count the remaining food for billing purposes (!).
I ask to a bartender if there is any croissant left. I'm having the impression I know this guy.
I believe it's a guy i knew (Yellow). He tells me to wait a second while he's going to check.
There's one from the day before and I still have to pay for it. I tell him I don't want it. He offers me for a big discount and I still don't want it. I ask if is everything good with him. We talk for a minute and I left.
I walk to a place with some bars and coffees. I entered and left some of them.
I was not alone. It's getting blurry.

Today i dreamt my mom was telling me i would have a new brother, then she was telling her
to the rest of the family and friends. After some weeks, the child was already 5 years old and a little
problematic, i felt i was like his dad and said to myself "So this is how my older brother saw me when i was
younger" and a smile came on my face, so i was in my room on pc, when i see him climbing the sitting room
closet, and i told him kinda furious "Are you crazy?! get out of there immediately you can hurt yourself and break
the closet aswell" and i wonder to myself "Should i really treat my brotherlike this? He would be mad at me"


Technique used for this dream: MILD
Sleep time: 6 hours

Unfortunately, I tried to implement my cunning plan too soon after my (apparent) success with training my brain to wake me up after every dream. I think I overloaded it and, last night, it kept me firmly and dreamlessly asleep till 7.30 am this morning


Sorry brain...I should have let the wake-up routine become more of a habit first...

I went to a job interview. It was going to take place in a crowded conference room. I did not go in yet, but waited in a chair outside. When the boss in charge (who was male) came, both of us walked into the crowded conference room at once, making an entrance. While everyone was still settling, the man to my left started asking me questions about breastfeeding versus formula. One of his questions was like "will you be more likely to run out of milk or formula during a feeding?" And my response was "You do not understand. You give the baby as much food during a feeding as will satisfy the baby, no matter which food it is. And once you are done, you hope the baby is satisfied enough to not devour you." While I was just talking to the one man, when I stopped, I saw that everyone was listening. I said to them that while they may think this is too personal, but it is important for this job that we can be honest. So next everyone was asked how many cigarettes they have ever smoked, and I said none. But there was a counter that increased and every time I denied it, it increased more as if to suggest I was lying. And I got angry and exploded that it was the truth, and that this job would only work if there is trust.

Note: in reality I did in fact breast feed my kids, and it is true that I never smoked.

I didn't take the time to remember.

I saw a tall skyscraper in a dark city. Someone was told in a stern tone to leave immediately, and I knew this was "how the war started". I thought about "they" stood no chance against "them" as "they were too well hidden". Accompanying that thought, I saw flashes of some kind of bunker tucked away between some other military-looking structures out in the sticks (red rocky environment, reminiscent of Nevada).

I was running on the asphalt road next to my old home, towards the Renault garages that used to be there. The layout was a little different, it looked a little like a park I was running through as I approached our garage from the west (in reality there is nothing to the west, just buildings). Either way, I was running very fast. So fast, I couldn't possibly corner and turn south. I had to make an extraordinary effort to slow down first. Then I continued running south. An old man (on a bike?) passed me, heading norh. He mumbled something. "What did I do this time?" I asked out loud. "I said: good day!". I felt a little bad I thought he insulted me, when all he wanted was to say hi.

Monday 7/22/13

I went to bed at 8pm. Was just so tired from last 2 days not getting enough sleep. Had a bunch of dreams. Then finaly woke up from a nightmare.

Started out not so bad. Cops were chasing me and two others. Normally, this is fun, but tonight, I was scared and uncomfortable. i think I have done something really bad. So I'm running away up the sidestreet, while cops are on the main street. I'm hoping the will drive by and not notice us. I can barely walk, like walking in a tar. So i turn and walk backwards. This has usually helped and I'm making some progress.

Then we re running through some corridors. Now I know I have done something bad. A geman shepherd walks in front of me and flashlight he has attached to him illuminates the corridor with weak yellow light. I prod him with my assault rifle and even before i do it, I feel bad about it. But can't stop myself.

Then a booming voice echoes from the end we are running from. Something about "they are coming for us". I start to yell in panic and others come back for me, because I can barely walk again.

EDIT:
I watched tv for about an hour before going back to bed. Decided to say my mantra "next time I'm dreaming I realize I'm dreaming". And I also decided to add "when I see blue star, I realize I'm dreaming". There is something about visualizing blue star on the Yoga Nidra cd I practice. So I thought I add it as something new. Perhaps my mind will pay attention to it because it's new.

So as I'm reciting these two mantras, suddenly I hear mysef saying: "Next time Karl is not there I realize I'm dreaming". LOL I had to get up and write it down. Where it came from, I have no idea. I don't know any Karl.

I'm getting closer and closer to my task. I really hope next time I can actually do it. I want it so bad!

super short DEILD

I started waking up and realized I was dreaming. I felt myself waking up but tried anyway. I was in a beautiful field with a bunch of trees in the background. I decided to fly, which is the first thing I always do. I jumped up off the ground effortlessly and flew into the air. I think I might have seen a rainbow. After only a few seconds of flying, I thought to myself, "okay. This isn't what I'm here for." I closed my eyes and pictured where I wanted to be. When I opened them, I ended up in the shower(no water running) in my house. So close! I woke soon after.

The second of two lucids from playing Myst at WBTB.

Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

Lucid #123: Walking Backwards

I'm walking by a pool with Dad toward a pile of towels on a beach chair. He asks me how to get really lean for the summer. I'm going through some long-winded explanation and he keeps asking the same really basic questions, apparently understanding almost nothing I'm saying. I wonder why he's so slow to grasp what I'm saying but then realize that I'm dreaming.

Dad has vanished and I'm standing alone by the empty pool. It's long and skinny, like a stretched out Olympic pool. I fly over it toward a doorway on the opposite side. I walk through the doorway into a busy two-story mall. I decide to allow myself a couple of minutes to walk around and take in the sights.

I pass a few stores, turn a corner, and suddenly feel a jolt of fear that the dream won't be stable. I start narrating out loud: "I'm having a really stable lucid dream." I rub my hands together, continuing to narrate out loud to the DCs passing nearby. "And now I am rubbing my hands together. You cannot forget to do that shit!" I yell.

I remember wanting to get to the Colosseum and expect to see an Exit sign. There it is, on my left, near a bank of doors. I walk toward the doors when I spot my friend "Chia" approaching me with a sort of vacuous grin on her face. "Hi!" I say. She repeats it back: "Hi!", still grinning, but her face is sort of morphing into a stranger's face. It's not stable.

I tell Chia that I'm going to the Colosseum and that I'll talk to her later. She nods, and rather than turning away, she walks backwards, not looking where she's going. She's walking near a support column that for some reason is covered with awful stuff like barbed wire and Orcs Must Die-style wall blades. "Watch where you're going!" I say, really feeling distressed. But she just smiles blissfully, circling around the column and out of sight.

Okay, back to the task at hand -- Colosseum. I head for the exit doors, shoving the door open with the crash bar, expecting to wind up in one of the tunnels under the Colosseum. The next hall is a tunnel but it still looks like part of the mall. As I'm deciding what to do next, I'm thrown into the void.

In the darkness of the void, I clearly sense my dream body. But when I try to rub my hands together, I can't make it happen. Awareness of my physical body starts to creep back in. I keep trying to move my dream hands but I'm not getting any response. After attempting this for a while, I finally wake up.

I tryied playing some Myst during my WBTB and it seems like it had a serious influence on my dream content and possibly my lucidity.

Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

Lucid #122: Myst

I'm walking through an underground chamber with smooth stone walls and a very high ceiling. I hop up onto a ledge and start walking along it when it occurs to me that I'm probably dreaming.

The environment looks very sharp and my awareness feels high. I take the time to assess the visual quality of the scene -- it's completely lifelike. I walk on the ledge, which wraps around the entire room before leading me out through an exit door.

I'm in a narrower hallway now. There's a low tunnel on my right and I decide that it will lead me to the Colosseum for Task of the Year. As I'm watching it, though, I feel like the ceiling of the tunnel has gotten lower. Before I can dismiss this idea, it totally takes over and the tunnel's floor and ceiling close together, sealing it off completely.

I move on, passing through another broad, high chamber like the first one. This leads into a rougher-looking tunnel that cuts back and forth several times at 45-degree angles, very different from the clean, precise right angles of the earlier rooms.

The tunnel opens up at the end and I can see what looks like the inside of a baseball stadium. It's not exactly the Colosseum, but I feel like I can make it work. I manage to get just into the stadium area but the dream ends.

Ok, this one I do not even know whether or not it is a memory of a dream or a daydream or what:

I have a sense of going down (or possibly up) stairs in a staircase holding on to a railing and there was energy in the railing.

This came to me as a vague shadow of a memory of a possible dream during daytime. Since I had no dream recall at night, I shall assume this is a dream memory late after the fact.

I was in an office room, in the future. The environment looked very bright and sterile with a lot of curves in the architecture; I loved it. A man in a suit was flirting with a woman who also worked there, possibly his secretary. At one time, they got awkwardly close and almost kissed, but she broke it off just in time. The man walked to his desk and tried to blackmail the woman into something, probably using the kissing incident against her. I opened one of the drawers in his desk, and found blueprints for buildings and cars. I assume the company must have been a designing firm. One of the blueprints caught my eye: a formula-one car of that year (or the next). "Oh, cool! The 2020 F1 car?" I said enthousiastically. "What year is it anyway"? I didn't know for sure, though I was sure it was the twenties. He started "explaining" in a very cryptic way, but never just telling me. "This is so typical of dreams, they never give you a straight answer!" I said in response. Aaaand then I woke up.

DJ got wiped as my laptop crashed... this will be a quick summary.

I was in some kind of attic, and I was floating. My "friend" from the past, Barra, saw the whole thing, and I told him to try. He could float too. "See? It's easy!" I said.

I saw an ad for a new hobby on my computer, and immediately went to the place. It looked like a school gym, or the inner corridors of a stadium. I asked some people whether this was the place, and they said it was actually for little kids (a place where kids can get theraphy for social skills or whatever). I saw a blonde girl I know from work sitting on a bench nearby. In this dream, her name was "Liuven". For some reason I was feeling very unusually courageous and smooth, and I went to talk to her. In real life she makes me nervous as hell and I'd never speak to her in public. She asked for my number, and I remembered this is how females show they want you to ask for theirs (I have a bad RL experience with this). I asked for her number, and she gave it up. Later on we walked off, and we were talking. Then something happened that interrupted us.

Above ground. We were at a lake, and saw that the horizon was so dark, it was as if the world was upside down. My ex-friends Fenn and Barra were there, too. We sat down by a lake on some comfy chairs. Suddenly, I saw a large meteorite enter atmosphere and crash violently several clicks away. Then I felt something hitting my skin. They were micro-meteorites, a whole storm of them. We rushed underground, down some kind of hatch. We ended up in some kind of sewer. We looked into one of the tunnels, and saw a fire erupting into an inferno and coming towards us. Suddenly, Peter Petrelli from Heroes grabbed the girl, "Liuven", and shielded her from the flames. They were both burned to a crisp. Unexpectedly though, Liuven started regenerating, and Peter mimicked her and healed soon after. We were all surprised to discover Liuven was special.