Recent DJ Posts

A few days ago I was thinking about something like DJ, but not exactly. I mean... something all-in: Dreams, reflections, ideas etc. Just like blog. This will be hard to me, because my english is not perfect, but I hope, I will improve that lang soon - here, with your help Also I start today my "Oneirobook" in my original lang, on my small notebook, so I will first write my logs in the notebook, and after, I will translate that here (If I find some time).

So... let's get started.

My dream signs: darkness, death, suffering

24.07.18
Dream:
I don't remember well my todays dream. I was dreaming about I play in hide and seek, with my friends. I was not a child. My age was unknown, but probably I had 21 years, like nowadays. It was dark. I hide between thuyas in my garden, but I was dressed in white clothes. [I don't remember that part]. In next stage, I was hiding behind door. My sister found me pretty fast, so I took my pistol, and shoot her. I don't know if she survived that, or no (I shoot in her head), because the dream jump into other scenario.
I was in game, like PFS, and I had still my gun. I was climbing on ramps, and killing enemies. Ramps were like levels in game. On the end of my dream, I had flamethrower, and I had 12% hp xD


SP:
I wake uped at 6 a.m, but at 8 a.m I was sleepy, so I decided go to bed and try WILD. At the beginning I just lie on my bed, and just listen music. I cannot fall asleep, because I keep my attension on musics text. But, when I stopped that, then I took fast SP, and after hipnagogs. I was playing with my HH, when my dad called me. Im with difficulty wake up, and answer my dad. After this I go back to bed I took next SP very fast. I was try again playing with HH, but I again hear my parents call. I must put a lot of work to stop SP and wake up. When I wake up, then I heared my little cousin. Suddenly I wake up again. That was a FA! And the parents call was fake too! I was angry and come back to sleep again. And again I had SP pretty fast. And you know? My parent IRL exhort me one more time! xD I looked on my watch. It was at 10 a.m

Found myself back at my first job. I look around and notice a few changes here and there. As I run pass the hallway I look to my right which I expected to see an elevator but to my surprise it was no longer there. I then could see a new change of something more futuristic. I go in to the tight small corner that led me to the new break room or what they called the beehive.

I went through many of the halls not remembering how big it was compared to the last time I been there. I finally got to the end as I realize I was looking for the men rest room. Once I made it I notice these group of people ding some kind of play. I sit back and watch them. Eventually the lights go out and could feel someone breathing against me.
Then I felt something hit me, after that the lights came on and I became lucid. I was not too happy so I toss him to the ground and tore up some of there stuff for the play.

I could feel my lucidity slipping and I prepare to focus on the ground getting ready to deild. But then suddenly my lucidity return back to being stable. I continue as this big guy came along trying to stop me. I eventually get bored of this and left the restroom and went back out to the break room. I told the guy I am leaving and to have no hard feelings. I went back in to the tight spots and corners and left my old futuristic first job. I then wake up

I used to deliver newspapers when I was younger. I visited the city I used to live in and started doing an old route I used to have. I walked to the end of town and talked to a store owner. I asked him if he still got the paper after all these years. It was of my memory that he usually only got 1 paper and it was always there the next day. No customer ever bought the paper from him. He had to think for a moment, as the normal carrier would just drop the paper down on the counter and the store owner wouldn't think about it. He looked in his records and asked me for what reason he would ever need to cancel the paper delivery. I suggested possible cost, disinterest, lack of people borrowing/purchasing said paper, etc. He confirmed that he was indeed still subscribed. I took a paper out from my side pocket and handed it to him and went on my way. I then tried navigating through the route while reading what looked like a big atlas. It was supposed to be the guide to delivering this route, but it wasn't accurate. I ended up walking through a school as a shortcut around a large corner, but then I got lost.
I was looking for 4th street, but I started seeing 8th, 9th, and then other random street names. I was lost. I went back to the school and exited the main entrance instead of the higher 3rd floor exit I did before. It seemed to put me on the right track. I was supposed to go West and I was going South.

I was driving with my oldest brother down a road looking for my mom and older brother. We accidentally drove past them so we turned around. Their car seemed to vanish so we pulled into a nearby mall parking lot and went looking for them. I had the idea that she was going to a specific store to return a poor fitting dress. Eventually we found each other. We all then went inside the store again to retrace our steps and see how we had missed each other. When we returned back to the car the side door was left open. We then saw someone standing at the front passenger door snooping through our belongings. He was browsing through a wallet and had a phone in his hand. When we walked up to him he casually put the items down and was going to walk away but then I noticed he had a flash drive and another item of ours in his hand. I grabbed them away from him and he ran off.
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There was a video game based on the fnaf series. It was a hallway with 3(?) doors. One next to the player, one in front, and one in back guarded by the marionette. The marionette was mutated, it had like 2 or 3 heads and was very alive. I, as the player, had also chosen some sort of puppet mask to put on. I walked up to the beast and it did its jumpscare, but then it disappeared. I must have been the one to scare it off. I opened the door it was guarding and saw some moving pipes. It seemed like a time challenge. You must squeeze past the blue pipe before it presses against the roof and squishes whatever is between it. I slipped past with a partner of mine. There was two cots and a pillow. Underneath the pillow was a pillow case filled with goodies. We poured it out and inside were a whole lot of 'nilla wafers, chocolate sticks, a few other assorted candies, and dice. The dice were somewhat of a mix between normal dice and craps dice. they were medium sized, and rounded. There were 4 big piles separated by color. One blue, one red, one yellow, one green. I sat and wondered what it all meant until the next dream came 'round.

I was exploring this city. It was the last of its kind, sort of like an easter egg in a video game, or a last bonus round of sorts. It took place after the main story line. The lore of this level was that all the inhabitants of the small city were "bottled up and stored away." Whatever that means.. I looked around and noticed people were vanished in an instant. Whatever tragedy had struck, it all happened very suddenly. There was an oven with time remaining on it. There was a meal cooking on a stove that was still warm. (Looked really good too! It was a big pot filled with cheese and small pepperoni squares from what I saw). Toast was popped up in the toaster. I walked around this store and had the idea to take whatever I wanted since nobody could stop me. I looked for a knife you'd see behind a display counter but I couldn't find any. The whole setting was both eerie and sad.

Night of July 19, 2018. Thursday.



Now I will move on to more specific patterns relating to the nature of the dream state. Having held such a keen interest since early childhood, and never losing that focus, I find it virtually impossible to make much sense out of most sources implying they are about dreams. Even much content on lucid dreaming does not correlate with anything I have ever experienced.

People who have never studied dreams (especially for a lifetime, as I have), or experienced them through every sleep cycle at various levels of liminality and lucidity, and continuously validated reactive representation in the dream state (thus being aware what dreams are actually doing), have no credibility in trying to convince people that their beliefs mean anything. They have no business even writing about them any more than if I knew nothing about cars (other than perhaps what I gleaned from “Archie” comic books) but wrote a book about them (and, since many people know a lot about cars, imagine their reaction). Still, the purpose of this series is not to address such fallacy but to review the nature of the waking process and the various forms of the emerging consciousness and to what extent it can be monitored and understood.

Lucidity, liminality, and subliminal focus vary from dream to dream. Ultimately, it is unlikely for someone to establish full control of ultradian rhythm, as it seems to be affected by diet and amount of exercise. (The WBTB or Wake Bake To Bed method results in disruption of ultradian rhythm but most people who practice it misunderstand this.) I always strive to make the best of what I have. What habits did I have regarding the dreaming process as I grew up?

A habit I have had since I was very young is the “lighting a candle” metaphor in coming out of an uncertain state of semi-consciousness. That eventually resulted in vivid semi-lucid dreams such as the one where I used lightning to set a tall church belfry afire. Some people like to talk about symbolism in dreams but fail to discern the incidental visual associations. I have always been fascinated by hypnagogia as well, where forms continuously transform based on visual similarity, even when I am at least partly monitoring the state. Hundreds of different unrelated images occur in only a short time.

What are some other metaphors (in addition to the “lighting a candle” focus) of the waking process that I deliberately established very early in life? The most obvious and consistent was the opening of a door. This intent always had two results, either vivifying my dream, sometimes exponentially in ways that defy belief, other times merely serving to wake me. These two potentials are always understood while in the dream state whether or not I am lucid, probably because they operate this way in real life. For example, if I want to “escape,” I create a door or doorway and use it as such. If I want to vivify my dream or create a different scenario, I create a door (though sometimes slide an entire wall as if it was a sliding door). It does not even have to be a typical door. For example, in my “Old Shack” dreams, I created and used the abandoned ruins of a rose trellis arched gateway as a doorway back into waking life (to escape from a pterodactyl, which simultaneously transformed into a falling sparrow - events such as this helped me understand more about reactive representation in the dream state).

Another form of reactive representation I created very early in my life was the bridge metaphor. That goes back so far that my mother used to tell me how I relayed this about dreams when I was a toddler. As with doors, I used bridges either to “escape” a dream scenario or to find my way to a different one. Sometimes such associations became mixed. For example, I would open a door inside my house and then see the ocean, as if the hallway was a bridge of sorts (which makes sense, as both represent routes of focus). I would jump from a bridge and land upon a stack of windows. The list goes on.

While there is not that much that can go wrong with a door, bridges can collapse or sink into the water. Staircases and elevators can serve as viable dream state mediation but can go wrong as well. As with cars, elevators are sometimes too small to get inside. They sometimes drop to the floors below before I can enter them. They are also more of a projection of illusory physicality (vestibular system correlation) than as with a bridge or door.

Ultimately, it is up to the dreamer to decide which reactive representation of RAS mediation and modulation serves them in the most viable way. Once the foundation is made and understood, it is unlikely to change. Some people choose to give themselves nightmares or erratic dreams. They may ignore beneficial transpersonal factors as if the interconsciousness does not exist to them. (As an analogy, they might not even have any grasp of why forest ecosystems work or why the food chain is at it is. They might invent a magical process to “interpret” such systems.) Others have learned what the dream state is and how to make the best of it.

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Readability score: 57.

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Completely non-dream stuff:

Just making a little note here, to remind myself that the past couple of nights I haven't been able to recall my dreams, for no particular apparent reason, other than the fact that my sleep is naturally poor.

Last night I compromised with my partner and made the radio stop coming on in the morning and I turn it back on for him after I've gotten up from bed (it's helpful for him to wake up). So we will see if this helps improve dream recall, as the voices from the radio were quickly making me forget details on some mornings, if it wasn't quiet enough.

However, over the last few days, since I've started keeping this DJ and reading the dreams of others, I have started to remember to do RCs in waking life more often, so that's a positive.

Created Monday 23 July 2018

Well, at least I got some fragments to note.

Scrap Group 1
Playing a multiplayer Tales of game (Phantasia or Eternia?).

At home. I tied my hair, only for the knot to fall off completely.

At a hotel with family. Later, we visit some distant relatives in a fancy condo complex. I fly around while seated crosslegged to show off, but no one seemed to care. I'd acknowledged these were "dream powers", but wasn't lucid.

Watching My brother playing Sonic Mania. Flying Battery Zone was now the penultimate stage. He missed the last few Special Stages in the game.