lucid

Dreams from October five to shix, 2017

I had one lucid dream on this night. I would title the night of dreams as a whole, "escaping with phone, back row anemia, giraffe pillow."

Firehouse

I was pulling out of the local fire house. I had no seat belt. I had a white pillow over my chest. In my convertible. The driver side door was open. A police officer came up. "Why no seatbelt? Because it is too high?" I felt fear I would get a ticket. Having been parked facing out also may have been trouble there as they have a rule there, "head in parking only."

Mix of Fragments

I lost a lot of these details due to needing to pee. So I will just write them in one heading instead of as multiple dreams, even if they were.

Box of comic books. Kids getting off a school bus.

There was something with a Pokemon who required 2 "light energy" to do an ability called "Pick Up".

Guy telling me to say his name when he wasn't there. Walking by a patch of grass.

Older woman walking with a cat?

Woods?

I was blending bananas and walnuts together in a food processor. The grey knob turned the food processor to a higher setting. They looked yummy. But I did not have time to eat them. My sister was in it. Something about 1:30 P M, watching a clock, no food on the boat...

Rich D R F type guy (owner of restaurant I worked at). Going on a boat. Making all these lions and tigers fight but they faked it? One lion put his fang on another lions head but he didn't clamp down. I remember the fang.

Text from Justin or Allen?

Some vague website.

Help from people in food program?

I was driving somewhere and had a sense of needing some "me time" (i. e. using my voice memo method to think out loud) but I felt I couldn't get away long enough to get some time to myself. I was driving down B Avenue from L V.

Something about an alarm clock cutting my sleep short, but for no reason. I was like, "Huh? Since when do I use alarm clox?"

Round 3 of dreams

It was 1:30 P M and was now 8:30 A M in the dream. I was going to a 9 A M class. I overheard C M and Jesse talking about big book. First I passed by, then stopped and said, yeah, I heard that, too. I questioned if I should interject that into their conversation, But decided, that yes, I should. J was my sponsor. (I also wrote fuzzy wuzzy was a bear in my dream journal, was that from a dream, or just a note to self?)

I needed my giraffe pillow. I got it and then went hyperspeed up stairs.

There was this slanted funny side walk kind of warped. I was driving down it trying to park. I was looking for the ramp to drive down. It was slanted diagonally but hard to put into words. So I was confused about how to drive down it.

A red truck was parked horizontal in a few spaces. Or a mini van. There didn't seem to be any room for my car. I felt it symbolized something in my waking life where there was no room for me in a group I was trying to attend.

Round 4 of Dreams.

Blue Tray of Gasoline. It didn't smell bad. It was in my room and bathroom. Like a yellow oil.

Program speaker. M was the host and spoke a little after the speaker about honesty or being sick. People on gameboys and anemic looking people were in the back row. They had freckles and were kind of blood shot. Pale skinned. I don't know if that is the correct usage of anemic but thats the word that came to mind when I saw

In another part I was running from someone who was considered to be the head mistress. I tried to teleport away with my phone as the teleportation device. Instead of teleporting us, it made is invisible. My friend and I. I felt a lot of fear, and didn't want to get caught. So it was kind of a panicking moment. My friend had a phone out and I thought, "That's a special kind of phone! We can use it to escape!" Then we used it to escape. Then I saw a hologram of 2 girls walking. I felt more lucid then. I was trying to stabilize the dream. Then I was up again, and laying there. Then I saw a smiley face. Then I woke up. I set an intention to have an L D in round 3 of dreams but had it this time. Still, very cool. One of my early ones.

2017, 10-05

The Dark Tower – Hold On to Me, Odetta

I am on a beach and it is near dark. I look around to see where I might be and I see that I am not alone here. I see three people not far away. Two men and a woman in a wheelchair. I wouldn’t have had to look to notice the woman, however, she is screaming expletives at the top of her lungs and laughing in a wild cackle. I recognize the two men when I get a little closer, it’s Roland and Eddy from the Dark Tower series. Both of them look exhausted. There is a black woman in the wheelchair, so that must be Odetta Holmes / Detta Walker… and I can immediately tell which one is in control right now. Not the lady, but the bitch. As I walk closer Roland spots me first, then Eddy, but I am quite a bit closer before Detta notices me. When she sees me she goes silent for a brief moment, then loudly announces that Roland and Eddy won’t have to suck each other’s little white candles anymore, now there’s a honky bitch here to do that for them… of course unless they prefer each other… She says she’s sure I’ll spread my legs for them!

I ignore Detta completely as she continues ranting and raving, cackling at her own bad jokes. I have a mission here, and I go over towards Eddy. I’ve forgotten that this Eddy has never met me before, so to him I’m a stranger. Roland introduces us. I tell Roland and Eddy that I have a technique that will help them deal with Detta more easily. Upon hearing her name Detta falls silent and then starts telling us not to be talking about her, so now the honky bitch wants in on the fun? I still ignore her and move a bit farther away. I tell Eddy that I know he’s already in love with Odetta Holmes, and that will help a lot. I tell him I don’t have a lot of time here, but if he will let me sort of merge with him I can show him how he can reliably cause Detta Walker to back off and Odetta Holmes to come forward at any time he needs to. He seems hesitant, so I say it works the same as when Roland was in his head. He seems hesitant still, he asks if Odetta will really come back… I say she will. He finally agrees.

I wonder how I’m going to manage this fusion with Eddy, but it works easily. I become transparent and just step into him. As one, we walk over to Detta. She’s acting scared, telling us to keep our honky hoodoo away from her. I have a song to use, My Last Breath by Evanescence, so I ignore Detta’s ranting and use it through Eddy. “Hold on to me, love. You know I can't stay long. All I wanted to say was, I love you and I'm not afraid.” Detta says she doesn’t want to be serenaded by no honky mofo bitch! I continue. “Can you hear me? Can you feel me in your heart? Holding my last breath, safe inside myself, are all my thoughts of you. Sweet rapture of light, it ends here tonight. Amidst the winter, a world of precious things.” Detta tries again to interrupt, she says she broke the blue for-special plate and it’s gone forever. I ignore that. “Look for me in the white forest, hiding in a hollow tree (come find me).” Detta says she’s going to hunt us down and we’d better stay in that tree or else… she trails off and rubs her head, her eyes are watering or she’s crying. “I know you hear me, I can see it in your tears. Closing your eyes to disappear, you pray your dreams won’t leave you here. But now you wake and know the truth, I’m still here…”

By this point I can see Odetta coming out, it’s time for Detta to go to sleep until at a later time she can be reintegrated with Odetta and the woman can be whole at last. “Say goodnight, don't be afraid. Only together we can face the night. (Say goodnight) Holding my last breath, (Don't be afraid) safe inside myself. (Calling you, calling you) Are all my thoughts of you. Sweet rapture of light, it ends here tonight.” As I / Eddy finish the last notes of the song I see that Detta / Odetta is looking confused, like she’s not sure how she even came to be here. Detta Walker has gone to sleep, Odetta Holmes has taken control. I tell Eddy that he only needs to use the song again if Detta comes back. It won’t do any harm to Detta, for she is merely another aspect of Odetta and the two must eventually become one if this woman is to survive and be healthy. Just remember the song and Detta Walker will not be able to cause any more trouble. Before I can figure out how to separate from Eddy I wake up.

2017, 10-05

Mystery Raiders

I am on a beach, though I’m not sure where I am. I walk along the beach for a short distance, but I don’t get a chance to think much about the situation before I hear gunshots not far away. The sounds are coming from the opposite direction from where I was heading, so I turn around and hurry in the opposite direction. The beach is mostly straight so soon I see some people up ahead on the beach. There is more gunfire, I see some people that seem to be attacking, a single man is taking cover behind some rocks and picking attackers off one by one, and there appears to be a body on the ground not far away from the man, also behind the large rock. There also seems to be a door standing there on the beach all by itself, a door that couldn’t possibly lead anywhere but I’m sure it does. The door is standing open, but all I can see through it is darkness. I go up in the hills off to my right to keep from being seen as I get closer to see what is going on. When I get up on a hill overlooking the fight below. I can now more clearly assess the situation.

The man who has been shooting is MoSh. He is using a pair of ancient looking guns that make a sound that could be heard from miles away every time one fires. The dead man is Roland from the Dark Tower books… but he’s not dead, I can see he is breathing though he doesn’t look too good. He looks sick, maybe on the brink of death. The people… if they are people… attacking them are the strangest thing going on here. They are completely concealed within cloaks and look like overgrown Jawas from Star Wars movies. Also, they have what look like guns, but the guns make no sound when they fire. I can only tell one has fired when a chunk of the rock MoSh is taking cover behind explodes. Each shot MoSh makes takes out one of the strange attackers, but there seem to be so many of them. Each of the enemies also turns to a black dust when the body hits the ground, conveniently leaving nothing by which to discern what they are. Then I see more of them coming out the strange door. MoSh sees that, too, and is almost close enough to reach out and close the door... but not quite. He would be exposed for too long.

Ok, so a distraction is in order. I move a bit farther away from the door and come down in a place that would make the attackers turn away from the door and MoSh. They don't seem to notice me at first. I call out to them, "Hey! Are all of you so craven that you can't even show your faces? Or are you so ugly that you're really doing us a favor by hiding?" That gets their attention. They turn towards me and aim their weapons at me. MoSh calls out that I don't want to get shot, do I? I call back that this is a dream, I'm not worried about getting shot. I form my left arm into an Alex Mercer shield as I see an enemy make a movement to fire. I hear no sound until I hear the sound of an impact on my shield that has a surprising amount of force behind it. And after the physical impact there is a wave of dark energy that flows over me... these guys play dirty! I stabilize the dark energy as I wonder exactly what these enemies are... dark energy wielding Jawas on steroids? I see MoSh is taking advantage of the distraction to reach the door and close it... but it won't close! I add a telekinetic push to the door to help MoSh out, but it still won't move. Shit... Roland probably opened the door, so he probably has to close it... I distract the enemies with a couple bolts of lightning through Metallica's Battery while MoSh gets back to cover and then I quickly join him.

More enemies are coming out the door to take the place of the ones I hit with lightning, MoSh plugs two of them before they even set foot on the beach. They fall on top of each other and then turn to dust. MoSh says the door wouldn't budge. I say Roland probably opened it, he probably has to close it. MoSh says good luck with that... can I heal him? He motions to Roland's motionless body. I go over to Roland and look at him. The heat of a fever is coming off of him in waves. I reach for his right arm and I see that his right hand, while whole, is badly swollen and an angry red color. I take hold of the hand and focus healing energy through Roland. MoSh says I'd better hurry, he's almost out of ammo. Roland seems to wake up from a fever dream and he reaches for his guns, which are missing. He then seems to recognize me. He looks over at MoSh and says he'd half thought seeing MoSh had been a dream. I tell Roland he has to close the door since he opened it. Roland says the door was a trap, a fake. I say yes, but he still has to close it. He struggles to his feet and then drops immediately as he is being shot at.

I tell Roland MoSh and I will cover him as he closes the door. This time when Roland moves from behind the rock towards the door I call more lightning and MoSh quickly shoots several more enemies. Roland closes the door, preventing more enemies from coming. MoSh and I make quick work of the few enemies remaining. The door closes with a resounding crash, and I barely have time to see it is emblazoned with the word "VOID" before it falls to the beach looking like just a large piece of driftwood. Roland asks if MoSh or I know who those strange things were. Humans don't turn to dust upon death... I tell him someone is setting traps around, but I don't know who or why yet. MoSh looks like he is about to say something but instead he disappears. I tell Roland to only open doors saying, "The Prisoner," "The Lady of Shadows," or "The Pusher." I know those to be real. Before he can say anything in reply I wake up.

Old house bathroom, G in there and me sitting on counter. See but crawl out of toilet and he doesn't let me kill it, so it crawls into the wooden drawers under the counter. At night

Outside with him chasing me, old home backyard, go to neighbors backyard behind us and fall down. Books and legos, J comes up and we talk and he fires a gun. He said it's a blank anyway but it's load and flashy.

In grandma's house and want to leave so I go to the left and past two young girls, eventually running past stuff in old neighborhood, bend on our street going left. Down to the 5mph sign, I start rolling around, and see guy in a car who wolf whistles and cat calls me. Then gets out and starts taking pictures, another guy in car comes along and tells him to stop. He gets back in car and leaves, I miss the attention.

In plane that has stopped and I go walking around to tell people, I become lucid here and walk around trying to summoning random person. I check every. Seat and he's not there so I go and wake up mom, walk into a room with a kitchen set up to the left and a small table to the right. I grab stuff from the refrigerator to eat and savor, I note that most everything tastes the same sugary cinnamon type. As mom walks in I grab all the candies or cookies and chocolate stuff and put it on the table. She makes a comment about my hunger and I shrug it off because I know I want to engage all my senses to get my full lucid dreaming experience. She sits down at the table as I try some weirdly named cookies, lemon elephants or some stuff. They do taste surprisingly good though, like a lemon gingersnap. I offer them to mom and the two other guys sitting near the window, they each take a handful and nod. The cookies look like fish pellets by the way, the next is a big cookie that looks to be made from a young child's creative playdoh session. Slightly bigger than my hand and almost all blue, except in the middle where it's a green strip going all down the middle and in the green strip are a mix of black seeds and orange to yellow colour around them slightly. It tastes like a fruit loops cinnamon bun combined and I figure I'd better work on my other senses, so I leave it for mom to finish. I look to the ground and smell the fresh air, a breeze is blowing and gives me a chill. I rub my arms and notice they are sleeveless, despite going to bed wearing sleeves, I ignore that and close my eyes for a moment to help. This has helped in past lucid dreams and as I opened them then, I see everything just a bit clearer.

I nod and go to walk outside through another door, when I suddenly remember a dream challenge. I go back to mom and first ask if I may ask her something, she replies yes and I ask her what do I not know about myself? She responds that it's a good question and as she leans back in the chair to think, I wonder if she'll say anything at all. But she does and comes to the conclusion that I'm "flimsy." I did ponder that for a bit and finally thanked her, I tried to remember my second challenge but failed and assured myself I didn't have to rush things.

So I finally left through the door and woke up.

I went downstairs and searched the cupboard for food, trying to remember the other challenges, I found the exact same cookie in my cupboards. So I ate it and the taste was the same, I noticed I had control over my actions but didn't use this to tell myself I was dreaming..perhaps I already knew.. I did have to use the bathroom though so I did that, then I looked outside and saw three pathways carved into my woods, I went and walked towards them a bit and saw them getting a bit wider. I wondered if it lead somewhere and I chose to go to the middle one, as I approached I saw two guys and tried to wonder which they were. I kept thinking one was someone I knew but then I got them mixed up and one was walking toward my home anyway so I went with the other guy who was going towards my chosen entrance. We walked until we saw a defense system, a dragon's head as a current at the start of the road leading to the door. I waited until my new company had walked past it and then saw it shot a constant laser out of it's mouth and it's head rolled in almost every direction. I started running when it seemed to target me, once it hit it burned and I freaked out. Running to the door it just kept itself trained on my back, I saw a health bar below my feet and kept running once I noticed it moving down waaaay too fast. My friend didn't have one but kept running faster, I managed to catch up to him when we were almost at the door and I was almost dead. I lunged in front of him and said stay behind me, it worked and I managed to jump into the grid door which threw me out the other side onto the ground of some..mall? Someone near me smiled and started walking, so I followed them and noticed my health bar fill up and disappear. I don't regret using my friend as a body shield, and look around instead. The place does look like a mall and in front I saw people moving like the undead, I shake the feelings off and blink to make them disappear. It works and I continue up the stairs that the man next to me leads me to, I really wanted to head out the main doors but then I woke up for real.

Dreams from the night of October 1 to October 2.

I am going back through my hand written dream journals and typing them up for review. Also I hope to have an LD count by the time I'm done going through these.

Paper Plate Dog mask

My mom's friend had this dog mask thing with orange glasses. It was made of a paper plate. Like a wolf's face drawn onto a paper plate with orange glasses on the wolf. The idea was that people would forget how to make this craft, and it was hard to scan and replicate. Someone was driving with it on.

Rapper with Sterno Gun

A well known rapper had a gun. But it was loaded using sterno base things like they have at buffets.

Job Search

I was looking up ads to be a "personal aide" but it seemed there was some kind of innuendo involved. It was day time.

Significant Romance Dream

I was in this room with two beds and a fridge in the middle of them I think. I was listening to some heavy metal music. It was the same music I hear in my head but can't find the actual song of. Maybe my own original music of my soul, if only I could play well enough. I didn't know it was a dream, so I was thinking, oh, wow, I found it! It was kind of Joe Satriani style.

A woman appeared in the room. We were opening a fridge. Then, I was in a bed and she same and spooned with me. It was a very intimate feeling but we didn't do anything not child friendly.

I think I realized it was a dream and stabilized myself with some words that were written on the wall. It was all not really understandable, but I was really staring at them, trying to memorize them. The mental focusing and visual focusing helped me stay in the dream. But I couldn't recall the words upon awakening. It was like a Wikipedia page. While I was reading it, I realized I was dreaming, and the previous parts had been a dream.

I wrote a message to the woman on the wall. The wall was yellow. I wrote in teal on a silver circuit breaker. I remember the message but I will save it for my private notes because it was personal.

A dog was also into the room and came into the bed with us to snuggle. I also noted that the woman was wearing navy blue. The dream was very vivid.

Someone else came in the room. The lights got brighter and I looked for my orange glasses. For a moment, I didn't have them on. I worried about the melatonin suppression for it being night time.

Please Refrain from Dissing my Sister

This was a longer dream that took place at my Nana's house. In her living room and ground floor areas mainly. I was sitting on the couch with the woman from the previous dream and another guy. He was in the middle couch, and the woman and I were in chairs on either side of the couch. The guy was a bit heavier and wearing a funny hat. He was a video game sprite designer.

We were playing on a Sonic Level with invincibility. Someone was saying, "You can't do that". I think what happened was we lost invicibility going over some spikes and lost all those rings or coins. Then Sonic and Tails looked tired. For that time the video game was on "full screen" on the "dream screen".

When it pulled away, we were still on the couch. I asked the guy if he designed Pokemon Sprites. I forgot if he answered, but I felt so excited to hang out with a real video game sprite designer! At the same time, because he had a more advanced career than me, I was afraid he would draw the woman away from me. So I felt insecure especially about my career not measuring up to his.

When he asked me what I did, I didn't say much. Probably just a vague kind of reply. I wanted to tell him about my Fii Note, but in the dream, it was just a regular white board. So, it didn't seem very special. In waking life I had just got a new app called Fii Write that I was really excited about, so that carried into my dream.

Then my sister was walking through the room. She had got a gift for having been sober a year. It was a white board, folded up and wrapped in plastic, with a marker. She goes, "That's all I got?" in dissappointment.

Then the video game designer guy began to mock her, repeating, "That's all I got?!" over and over. I was angry. "How dare he mock my sister?" So I started to squeeze his neck. His neck actually squished a lot in my hand, like soft material. But he didn't die. I was really angry.

I took the guy out into my Nana's ground floor hallway and threw him over the railing down into the den. Then, I got a long metal poker, like a chimney poker, and stabbed him with the sharp end as he lay there in a fetal position.

Then I turned to my left and his father had just come in. His father had this big crazy weapon thing. My Dad was at the little table at the top of the stairs to the den, bending down to go through some sort of box. I hid behind my Dad, hoping he would protect me. The guy's Dad was angry at me for hurting his son and was going to retaliate. I realized that I had a little knife. I thought that his Dad might hurt my Dad since my Dad seemed oblivious to what was going on, as a way to get revenge. I tried to grab the guy's giant pocket knife chain saw thing with my hand. I felt lots of fear. That was when I woke up.

Once I was awake, I reflected on what I could have done if I had become lucid.

I want to shower

I was showering slowly in the upstairs bathroom of 15 Swoo. Someone else wanted to shower. They wanted me to finish my shower later. But they said they were going to wait three minutes before their shower. So I said I would finish my shower before the three minutes were up.

While I was trying to shower, there was some annoying drilling. I looked outside. It was coming from some kind of T V out front. I wrote "I thought to go write". Was that in the dream?

Vague Conflict

The dream was about a conflict with someone I was afraid would catch up with me. But I didn't remember the details.

Pool

I was on a treadmill near the entrance to the pool. It was 10 A M. I saw my friend Alex and asked him if the pool was open. I was writing in Green. I went down to the locker room. I couldn't find which lock was mine. All these different locks, but where was mine? I was thinking I could swim without needing audio, but what about my left shoulder?

Food Dream

There was something about one of the brown dessert foods they give to the kids at Easter. And an innuendo relating it to poop.

Notes

When I look back at these dreams 5 months later, I can remember how excited I was to have a little bit of lucidity and a really vivid dream. I think I woke up from the conflict dream with lots of adrenaline in my system. At the time I would use the MILD technique to imagine what I could have done if I became lucid in certain dreams.

Got a few dreams to note, including DIELD. All but the latter are fragments, though.

Scrap Group 1
Watching Rick and Morty. The latter was in a chapel with his family (sans Rick). Apparently, Morty was marrying a gnome with a flagrant... bulge in his pants. Beth wasn't too happy with this, which in turn causes resentment with Summer. Later on, Morty seems to snap out of a daze, and realizes this matrimony was involuntary; Rick had previously drugged teen. So, he calls the whole the off. The gnome begs for Morty's return, and admits to doing painful things to cause the, uh, bulge for his sake, though Morty ignores as much. Later, Jerry complains of small flaws he noticed in decorations. When his ramblings went off-screen, his voice was replaced with that of a hammy stage performer for whatever reason. Concurrently, Beth and Summer were busy arguing on gay marriage rights issues.

At the bedroom of an unknown home, of which warps into another. Jonathan shows up. We start looking for some blue file folder. Noticed the main theme for Twisted Metal 2 sounding in the background. In a filing cabinet, I find what I thought was the correct folder, only for Jonathan to point out numerous copies of the same object.

Dream 1 - Contrived Cascades

DIELD transitioned from a dreamlet. The visuals were blurred. I was walking around the neighborhood during the dead of night. Wasn't sold on this being a full dream at first. I look up at the sky, and imagine the moon appearing. Instead, two bright interstellar clouds form, one silvery in color, the other violet. That's when I'm suddenly pulled up into the depths of space, and I finally rubbed my hands to confirm the dream state. Oh, the vibrant sight of comets, stars and nebulae never ceases to entice. After a few minutes of soaring through the cosmos, the view shrinks into a window skewing and bouncing around black borders. Not anything some manual arrangements couldn't fix.

I then thought of doing TOTMs, of which the 'awareness behind the dream' task was readily in mind. "Awareness beyond the dream", I called out, "what should I see? What should I dream?" Cue immediate warp. I find myself in a billdboard-2.5d room, its ceiling, floors, and walls all appearing as rocky tiles made of water. Realistic waterfalls leaking throughout the structure contrasted this otherwise contrived sight. And yet, when I passed through these cascades, I felt nothing. When I looked at my right hand, I saw it was replaced by a hand-shaped mouse cursor.

Another warp half a minute later. I was now in an elementary school's computer lab. On screen in front of me was some Roblox game or something similar. Figured that's what I saw before. I soon lost lucidity, and got caught up in the act of being an adult student there in the same class as my nephew, Lucas. Not too clear on what happens next. Pretty sure this involved a teacher catching me playing games on my assigned computer. The dream ended soon after that.

Scrap Group 2
Numerous dreamlets. Ones I remembered include the Demon roguelike, my walking around the neighborhood again, and later on, of my brother Eugene making a cake without eggs or milk. In each case, I tried going deeper by interacting with the environment, only to collapse the dream.

10.01.2017

Time Warp Syndrome (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

Notes: Took some galantamine before bed, but I didn't sleep well because I was somewhat dehydrated and had a headache as a result. Still, my dreams were fairly cohesive.

I'm camping out in a large, extravagent log cabin with a guy I'm friends with and an eccentric old man who owns the place. One of the rooms is furnished with equipment that either belongs in a torture chamber or a sex dungeon (or both). O_O

At nightfall, I become suspicious that someone is going to try to break in through one of the screen doors that lead into the deck at the side of the cabin. I walk through the dimly lit cabin, past where my guy friend has already decided to lay down for the night, and suddenly become lucid when I open the inner door that leads out to the deck. I decide I need to float across the deck rather than walk so that whoever is going to break in doesn't hear my footsteps. I float over to the outer door and lock it. I realize how much I've missed floating like this in dreams! It's sort of a casual thing, floating with my feet just barely off the floor (kind of like how Marceline from Adventure Time floats). I wish I could move like this in real life. It's so much easier than walking.

Trying to decide what to do, I'm about to head back into the cabin when I'm suddenly pursued by a man dressed in futuristic attire. I fly outside above the cabin to escape his reach, but he can fly as well! We have an epic swordfight in the air until the eccentric old man from before steps outside and sends the man back where he came from. The man tells me that we must now "timestamp" everything we do--- something about the time-space continuum being broken, so we now have to be constantly vigilant about "when" we are because things can start happening out of order.

Night of September 30, 2017. Saturday.



I am sitting on our couch in the darkness in our lounge room in our present home. I am on the right side of our couch facing the north end of our lounge room.

I feel very peaceful and in a state of well-being and bliss. I soon become aware that our oldest son has come out of his room (from our lounge room’s access door on the west of his room). He has a pale yellow cell phone with a flashlight beam coming out of the top edge of it (not an item he has in real life). He moves it around, mainly in a horizontal semicircle from his right to his left, as if searching for something or someone, apparently me. He seems very cheerful though about five years younger than he presently is (though my dream self does not consider this distortion as such). I quickly wake as a result of RAS (reticular activating system, which is what biologically controls the dream state dynamics and inherent waking symbolism), still feeling very peaceful, calm, and happy.

---

I had this longer microdream while actually sitting on our couch (same position and orientation as my dream) after the power had been out this evening for over an hour (the result of a regional blackout). I was so relaxed sitting in the darkness that I slipped into a microdream within a few minutes upon sitting down on our couch (which usually only happens as I am watching television). Our son carrying the flashlight “looking for me” was simply the biological RAS activation (otherwise typified as “searchlight waking symbolism” of the passive and positive kind). The emergent consciousness factor was quite brief and the preconscious dynamic was non-aggressive as this was not a dream of a longer sleeping period. (In actuality, our youngest son had used a flashlight but not on me during the period of my dream.) The cell phone feature is present due to RAS mediating consciousness (as a type of communication with the transient fictional dream self).

The strictly biological RAS “searchlight effect” has occurred in hundreds of dreams since early childhood, including in documented dreams online such as “Steering Clear of a Laser Tracking Weapon” from 2013, “Spacecraft in the Alley” from 1997, “Not Exactly the Three Musketeers” from 1988, “Laser-Eyed Alligator” from 1979, “The Beam” from 1977, and a number of other dreams.

For the majority of people who have no understanding of dreams, it may be important to address why this biological RAS activation is different in this case from other dreams that utilize the same basic waking symbolism (the dawning consciousness metaphor), for example, how does this dream differ from “Laser-Eyed Alligator” or other dreams of the same type?

The most obvious difference here is, I expected and wanted the power to come back on. In “Laser-Eyed Alligator” and “Steering Clear of a Laser Tracking Weapon”, my dream self, at a subliminal level, did not want to wake yet. This is what RAS and the transpersonal preconscious are for. It is not rocket science unless one is superstitious and clueless.

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On a side note, I talked with my lovely wife Zsuzsanna tonight about a possibility of perhaps editing and resupplementing all 4,000 or so of my dream journal entries presently on the Internet to make them more “idiot-proof”. Alas, this seems next to impossible. No matter how much clarity and accuracy I include in some of my entries, based on over fifty years of experience, there are people who do not get dreams at all (or of whom are of the unfortunate mentality to believe in “dream interpretation” in the various superstitious or pseudo-psychological ways the term is misused). There always seems to be one person (usually a male with obvious personal issues) who somehow feels the need to contradict the obvious or add to my post in various ways. I am stating that here just in case such a comment appears on an entry.

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I've been having a positively awful first few weeks of the semester. I think I was still in summer mode and then wham, all these assignments hit me and I wasn't quite prepared for it.

I've been forced to sacrifice a lot of sleep lately for the sake of grades, but I'm going to try really hard to do that as seldom as possible.

I did have one LD this past week. Unfortunately, I can't really remember what happened in it. But the one blessing of sleep deficits is REM rebound, so I've been taking advantage of that.

Last night I had a positively wonderful non-lucid dream. I met Amy Lee from Evanescence, who was performing at a house for a semi-private concert. We were in a basement, actually, but it was fancy and well-furnished. Tons of people there. I don't even remember if any of the other band members were there. But I actually got to talk to her, and she was very pleasant and kind. She sang, and her voice sounded amazing. After the concert, I got stuck in a mass of people and I was trying to find her in order to say goodbye to her. A friend of mine (who only existed in the dream, i.e. I have not met him in real life but in the dream he was somebody that I knew moderately well) asked me where I was going. I said, "I have to find Amy! I want to say goodbye to her!" He laughed good-naturedly and said "What, do you want to marry her or something?" xD It was like I was in elementary school again or something. And I said, honestly, "Yes, I would absolutely love that, but she's already married. I just want to say bye to her." He laughed again and let me go after that. I couldn't find her though, and then I woke up. The house was a duplex in a really nice neighborhood with some Gothic architecture and imagery, like ravens on the mailboxes. It was rather awesome, actually.

Super cool dream. I woke up very happy. It was a pleasant conclusion to a terrible week.

And I sound like such a "fanboy", ugh lol.

Work

First memory is eating a mcdonald's burger in the lounge and finding frozen fries in my burger.

It shifts to me working in kitchen. I become lucid randomly when I look away from someone and look back and what was a guy with brown hair is now blonde with a beard. "Never switch a switcher." I tell him and he laughs. Someone else is staring at me and I say it's a dream. I walk around the sandwich table and begin to lose the dream. To prolong the dream and incorporate more senses I pull a chicken nugget tray out and start eating nuggets. I can taste them but am able to eat them too fast. Kind of feels fake but it makes the dream more vivid.

I walk away and now I'm in a living room. I sit on a couch and stare at my hand. I begin counting my fingers and see weird fingers under my other fingers. My hand has a 3D landscape on it. I can see houses on my hand and people walking about. I am confused. Next part is hard to recall.

I'm in a house somewhere. I become lucid but forget what made me lucid. I begin to call out for asuka looking for her. I run into a guy that looks like the priest from the exorcist T.V show. I begin talking to him but he walks away from me not wanting to talk. I call out to Asuka again. Calling for her makes the dream shift. I'm outside at night and see something like a town hall. I look down and up and now the hall is gone and it's a house. I walk towards it. I jump and try to fly but can't stay in the air. when I land two people are standing on the lawn. I'm not sure who they are but they seem to know me. A man is standing beside a woman with black hair. she seems taller than usual and white. They call to me. I gaze into the woman's eyes because they look strange. The pupils and iris's roll and reveal another eye. I look at black spots on the whites of her eyes and looking close i can see lots of mini eyes. I tell her it looks kind of cool. she doesn't say anything and suddenly we are inside a house in a kitchen. I grab her body and hold it and say she feels nice. I then glance at the man but he is shorter and changes his face.

I'm wandering in a house suddenly by myself asking myself if it's a dream? I look at my hand quickly and they seem normal,I jump and float and now I'm lucid again. I grab onto the top of a door hinge while floating. I begin to look for asuka again but the dream fades.

This is from going over old notes and typing it up in a neater format months later.

September 29, 2017 to September 30, 2017.

I forgot these dreams at first, until I laid back down from trying to write them. Then, they came back to mind.

There was a part where no one wanted to hear my raps.

Turtle, turtle, turtle, who needed a bigger shell. I got him a new one from another organism that was blue. It had top and bottom segments you could take apart.

There was a magazine with an Egyptian thing in a stack of wicker baskets. Some kind of waiting room or lobby.

Going downstairs to play video game. It was a 3 player game. My friend G F as well as girls were there too. Something about a beige carpet. Months later, some dreams I don't see as clearly.

Then I wrote, trapped in a building. Couldn't get out. Brown doors. Some teacher guy?

As I write it, it comes to me!

A meeting with a guy with a big hat. Great memory!







This dream I remember vividly. There was a black centipede thing in this spider web. It was tremendous. I tried to grab a stick. It had sharp legs. It turned slowly out from its web thing to look at me. As it did this it seemed to grow. I turned to run away. As I ran, I felt very sluggish and slow, like I weighed a lot, or my legs were stuck to the ground. I felt stuck. I felt lots of fear that the big centipede monster would catch up to me and attack or something. This sense of running but being stuck in place triggered lucidity somehow. I think I realized I was dreaming and flew up. 5 months later, I can't quite remember exactly what happened. maybe the dream just jumped to a new scene. But it was one of my earlier lucid dreams and a cool way to get lucid. I know I flew later though and I think it had to do with this "spark" of lucidity.

Something with T S. Are you righty or lefty? A tear down his fathers eye. T S almost falling backwards down stairs. I had gone to where T S was to look for his father. I got the sense that his father didn't like me talking to him. T S wanted to learn to write. I think I wanted to help. T S is somewhere further along the autism spectrum but I always saw him as a whole and complete person. There was something with their family having library books on the table. I remember doing something with the pile of library books. I think this was a lucid part of the dream where I felt like I was being helpful.

I forgot if anything happened next. I found myself outside and flew into the air! One of my early lucid flying experiences. I flew up by kind of seeing the map beneath me zoom out. Like somehow imagining the ground beneath me getting smaller could make me fly. For a moment, my sister was with me. I was carrying her through the sky as I flew. I have had many lucid dreams where my sister appeared and I tried to help her with dreaming skills. So I made it so the back yard got very small. Then I saw its outline. Someone on the ground was yelling at me as I ascended higher and higher. I remember this was interesting to me as maybe it was a part of my consciousness afraid to go further into lucid dreaming. I still have a fear of flying in lucid dreams actually for various reasons. Either I think it will wake me up, or I think the dream police will come get me. It has been about 6 months now and I hope to move past that fear so I can enjoy flying in L D's. Flying in lucid dreams is probably symbolic and so part of my dream journey is to clear things that block me from flying freely.

One dream detail was something in a state park place. I don't remember more about this one.

I dreamed of my orange glasses. I kept dreaming that I couldn't find my Decibel Defense headset, and there was leaf blower noise. I think I remember this dream. I was at a desk in my room toward the end of the day.

Later in the dream, my phone kept changing to these blue port window things. Not the default Operating System. I kept feeling my physical body, then thinking, "No, stay in this dream." This happened on the time when we ate the blue things, too.

I guess there were more parts I forgot. Then I flew up into this attic loft. I was trying to summon a wummon. I was lucid. I tried twice to close my eyes and make her appear. I hadn't learned about thinking the person will be behind me or around the corner yet, so i was trying to make them appear in front of me. I noted that this was the same attic loft that I made the blue blocks turn into food and ate them.

There was also a bit about adding table sugar, which I never ear, to a batch of brown rice and beans, which I eat almost every day. I tasted it and worried, thinking I would have to throw out the batch, due to the sugar. That dream detail came to mind after I laid back down. I had a high success rate at the time with remembering a dream detail the next time I woke up if I fell asleep without writing it.

In the next "round of dreams", I didn't remember any at first. I knew I slept and I knew I dreamed though, so tried. I remembered that my friend A R was hammering trees with a metal spike pick.
There was a red You Tube button that fell off this wall near a ramp we were walking along. Something about we couldn't have it. It was like this red knob that fell down.

It seemed weird that I couldn't remember any of these dreams. Something with a guy from school who worked with computers. I wrote, "Something about boys?"

My sister's phone number had 3 extension digits after it.

We were at a sink and 2 girls were complaining about how much soap we were using. I said, I don't normally use that much, but it is really dirty. I had a tupperware and two sponges, one with Scotch Brite pad.

What happened during this dream recall was that it was around 7 in the morning. I was trying to recall the dreams as I sat in my chair. I think some time had already passed since waking up but I was able to keep digging back for one more detail, and another, by sort of hyper focusing on the visual of the last detail I got. Then others would pop up around it. I broke this one by answering the phone, and couldn't get back to it. Who knows what else I would have remembered! Every dream detail matters, and now, I definitely don't even turn the phone on at all until I have remembered my dreams in full.

Notes. That was exciting to go back through these. The story of remembering the dream is just as much a story as the dream itself.

Got lucid, went outside. It was overcast, cold and raining so I sit on my porch in a half-lotus position and attempt to meditate like I intended. It felt weird. The dream didn't get any more vivid. In any case, the lucid part of the dream ended after like 30 seconds and it was non-lucid randomness about being a japanese salaryman from there.

I am going over DJ entries from the end of september last year. Then I will be able to have them more neatly formatted. It was really interesting to look back on these and I look forward to going over others.



September 28, 2017 to September 29, 2017, Dream Recall.

The night began by us losing a dream by laying down too long. We wrote that we need to get up and write the dream down as soon as we become awake. Then, I D K, I know it is hard, because you need sleep, too.

Next dream. A guy who drank liquor and then would hypnotize people and eat them. But then he lived with people who helped him stop, like an old people's resort. Is there anything else you remember? That was a good one. No, not really. Oh, wait... Well, just some Pokemon card type of scenario. Oh well. Maybe next time. Okay, Inner Child. Thanks! Z Z Z...

Next dream. I was lucid and flying around making moves on the ladies but then didn't. I decided not to make moves on the ladies in L D world. So, I kept flying around, seeing girls but I was just letting them be. There was a girl by a window. I was looking around there for my tan couch cushion I use as a pillow. She seemed to feel like she was in my way. I told her, no, you don't have to move.

Next dream. I was on a wobbly dock near W H Beach. The dock was slippery and wobbly. There was something with Jay's voice playing, from the noon meeting. My two couch pillows and the blue raft were floating away or blowing away. The water was choppy, and it was windy. I felt scared. "Why did I go on this dock?" I thought. I kept thinking I want to save those pillows, because there are no other pillows like them. But I was afraid if I reached in for them, my phone might fall in the water. So I sort of watched them float away. I thought perhaps I really have four of those pillows, and the other two were still at home. In waking life, I only have two. My blue blow up raft was stuck in a silver hand rail, between that and something else. But it was slowly slipping and blowing away. I couldn't save any of it. I tasted salt water at one point. I am not sure why, but I climbed up this white ladder type of thing. It was made of white beach chair material. Then, I couldn't get down. I am sure there is some symbolism in this dream. The emotions had to do with loss.

Next dream. I was near the kitchen sink at my current house listening to a Young Jeezy rap. It was about stopping the crack game. I had a sad realization about it. Like that the rappers caused lots of people to be addicted to crack in the first place. Now they were making money off motivating people to quit. Not sure if this pertains to what is going on in the physical world.

Next dream. There was a dream I had about some friends from college. We were sitting in a circle. I was in a blue blanket.

Next dream. A man came into my room, telling me about a web site he had made with his son. I was letting him use my computer to work on the web site, but expected him to be quiet. When he kept going on and on, I felt angry. I was trying to dream journal. He kept trying to talk to me and I angrily yelled, "GET OUT!" . As he left, he slammed the door behind him. I felt bad because my Dad was in the house and would either be woken up or disturbed by the commotion. The man's headset got stuck in the door behind him. I also smelled cigarette smoke as he was leaving, which added to my anger. I felt scared that he would come back angry and hurt me. So I felt angry then scared, as well as concerned for how this exchange could have impacted innocent bystanders. Such as my Dad when he saw the guy storm out. This situation had similar dynamics to something I go through in my waking life, but just with different people playing the roles.


Next dream. There was this plant called a "Lung Plant" which had pores for breathing? I think it had sort of yellowish bulbs on it. And other plants to eat. It was said that plants and vegetables are different. This sounds funny to me now.

Next dream. I was actually a female character and I had a new job. My new boss was telling me where I could eat.

Notes. I am going back through these from hand written notes in Fii Write and typing it in a fully typed format. I still remember these dreams vividly, about 5 months later. I can even connect some dreams to my life circumstances at the time, and I see how some things have changed. The one on the dock is the one I most vividly remember.

That's 6 lucid's in two days. The first three dropped into wispy dream fragments, and the fourth resolidified after de-fragmenting.

I'm in an hotel/nursing home kinda place and once I realise I'm lucid, I get excited and move forward. I see the dream fragmenting and I speak out loud Dream Stability, and it works, but only for a few seconds, and dissolves.

In another dream, I realise I'm lucid, and find I'm in a fenced meadow with a couple of hundred people. I'm in my underwear and there's only one person who can see me, and this is because he's high on mary jane. Then his friends who are high too see me. I tell them we're in a dream, and then prove it to them by flying up. I ask for a joint as I can't have it in real life, and we're in a circle as they pass the doobie around. I take a deep couple of drags and the dream dissolves.

2017, 09-27

Dark Tower – Beach Party

I am on a beach at night. I look around to see where I am. It’s a nice beach, except for the strange creatures crawling out of the sea onto the beach. These things look like some kind of cross between a crab and a lobster with extra-large pincers, but I notice they aren’t coming very far away from the water. They’re almost talking, but they talk nonsense like, “Did a chick? Dud a chum?” I start walking along the beach with the ocean at my left. I soon see something up ahead in the light of the moon. I approach it more quickly and soon I see that it is a door standing by itself, standing open. All of these clues put together have convinced me I am in a Dark Tower world and where there is a door on the beach Roland probably won’t be far away.

As I approach the door I see something lying on the ground in front of it. I soon see that it is a body lying there, and I correctly assume it is Roland. I get closer and check to see if he is ok. He is breathing steady, although I can feel a heat coming off of him as if he has a fever. I wonder how he could have a fever when I healed all his wounds… unless maybe my energy only healed the damage and didn’t get all of the poison… I look around and see that I am no longer alone. There are other people standing around, most of them have smirks on their faces. They are all wearing the symbol of the Templars. One of them comes over to me and puts on a fake friendly face, he says we have something to discuss. He says he wants to know exactly how the doors along this beach work so he and his associates can build one of their own. I tell him I really have no clue how the doors work (I don’t) and these Dark Tower worlds are the only place I’ve ever seen them. He doesn’t seem to believe me. He says he has medicine that can help my friend (Roland) or he can make sure Roland has no body to come back to.

I am about to respond when I see another person on the beach with us. This guy looks like a holy warrior or knight, he is dressed in bright armor and carrying a cool looking sword. The Templar who had been talking to me turns and asks who the fuck that guy is. The knight holds his sword out in front of him and it glows with a golden light almost too bright to look upon. The knight says the Templars may bare the holy mark of God, but he has seen through their disguise. He says he can see they have abandoned the teachings of our Saviour, Jesus Christ, and now they must stand and face their holy judgment and be cast down back into the pits from which they came. Now I hear some of the other Templars muttering amongst themselves, they seem to think the knight is crazy. The knight doesn’t wait to see their reactions, he attacks with his brightly glowing sword which is almost blinding now. I shield my eyes and see a Templar open a portal and a large something comes through, looks like a giant or a golem of some kind, and it attacks the knight.

I am distracted when I see a Templar over by the door. I’m not sure what he is doing, but I know it can’t be good. I am about to do something, but it seems he is about to go through the door. He doesn’t make it, however… there is the sound of a gunshot and he falls right through the door, dead. I look where the shot came from and I see MoSh has joined the party. The next period of time is a bit unclear because there is some chaos. A couple Templars attack me and I demonstrate my Alex Mercer blade arm for them. A Templar is disoriented, looks like he has been blinded by the knight’s bright sword, and he wanders too close to the lobstrocities coming from the water and gets torn apart. I hear numerous gunshots from MoSh’s guns and soon there are even more because Roland has come back through the door and in spite of the fact he seems sick he is shooting like the guns are a part of his hands. I figure that even though I didn’t stop the venom from making Roland sick I was able to make sure he has both his hands whole.

Soon there are no more Templars, just MoSh, the knight who I am thinking might be a friend I have been trying to dream with named Austin, Roland, and me. This seems like a good chance for everyone to get to know each other. I’m not completely sure the knight is Austin, but I figure that is my best guess so I go with it and introduce everyone to everyone else since I’m the only one who knows everyone here. I am even more convinced the knight is Austin when he says I’m his sister and hugs me. I hug him back, though I’m not sure if he can even feel it through his armor. I have barely finished introducing everyone when I wake up.