Morning of November 13, 2019. Wednesday. Dream #: 19,322-02. Reading time (optimized): 2 min 30 sec. The gradual emergence of my instinctual self from slow-wave sleep into REM sleep carries the subliminal goal to achieve consciousness to get up to use the bathroom. My real-life identity is absent. The urge is not that pressing, so my dream self remains distracted within an imaginary realm, requiring considerable preconscious effort to arouse me from sleep due to warm weather. I had been swimming underwater in an unknown resort hotel to find a bathroom. During this time, an unfamiliar male is also in the underwater hall, swimming several feet behind me. Soon, a big catfish (though not much bigger than me) appears and eats the other male after bumping into him several times. I manage to get into the underwater bathroom and close the door behind me. I consider it might be better to use a different bathroom as I am uncertain if the toilet works. My dream self passively integrates with the precursory form of wall mediation (that modulates dream sleep into the waking process). The catfish is still outside the bathroom. It tries to eat me and keeps bumping into the door when I have it halfway open as well as striking my body. After a few minutes of battling the catfish, I swim out into the hall, and the catfish simultaneously swims into the bathroom, signifying escaping illusion to achieve wakefulness. I trap it inside by closing the door. My emerging proprioception (and vestibular system correlation) atypically decreases in the next scene (again, due to the warm weather), similar to the dynamics of a false awakening, where I typically tell someone about my previous dreaming experience, though it is part of the same dream in this case. While upstairs, I see several members of the public present in the lobby that is not underwater. I tell a male tourist (who is sitting on a couch) about the incident, as I do not see a hotel employee, though one soon arrives. He is unfamiliar and about thirty. I tell him in detail about the big catfish eating the other man. However, there is some uncertainty if the body would still be whole or if he would be in pieces, as I recall the catfish was not much bigger than me. I become aware of the existence of my youngest son as a thread of my real identity emerges as I grow closer to wakefulness. My dream’s fictitious backstory now includes my son being at the resort with me, and we both need to find a bathroom. However, I start to lose my sense of self by falling back into passive dream meandering, which results in the preconscious pulling me back into the waking process by creating a post-Naiad simulacrum to increase proprioception again. I realize, as the room grows darker and with decreasing detail with my dulling senses, I had been holding onto something with my right hand and cannot go any farther (or return to slow-wave sleep). It turns out to be the yellow elastic belt of an unfamiliar girl standing at the bottom of a staircase. (Yellow is the color that correlates with emerging consciousness because of its brightness and association with sunrise.) I walk back several feet as my dream vivifies as I once again grow closer to wakefulness. I look at the coil (vestibular system autosymbolism, specifically the cochlea) that covers the palm of my hand, though this is illogical as it implies her belt had an unrealistic amount of slack near the buckle. I apologize to her, making an unlikely excuse that I thought it was the baluster of the staircase I had been holding yet while continuing to walk. She remains cheerful. The stairs are my instinctual cue to wake (though I often use stairs to vivify a dream).
Non-dream stuff; I was only aware of waking up at about 9, but I know I was awake before that. The dream I had in my memory as I woke up, I quickly forgot, by feeling the need to sit up and crack my neck and back, yet I somehow still remembered some earlier, non-lucid, dream fragments: Dream fragments: I remember being in a room, like at my parent's house, or my childhood home, but I can't say I remember the room in detail; it was one of the rooms at the back of the house and it was dark (but I didn't have the impression it was night). I was aware of a cat, black and white I think and there was a catfish or something... I distinctly remember the cat playing with the catfish and the catfish meowing; at first I was concerned for the fish somehow, and I remember turning my attention to something else and when I looked back again the catfish was gone, the implication being that the cat ate it. Suddenly it felt like the cat was aggressive and I remember trying to claw me; I think my instinctive responce was to smack it. In another fragment, I simply remember my two siblings being present. Possibly in a corridor leading to some stairs or with stairs intersecting it. Another fragment, I remember being aware of being back in my native country, with some sort of dream-generated friends or acquaintances in the dream and going up some dream-generated stairs, practically crawling up them, because in this dream my fear of heights seemed much greater. The stairs now remind me of something that Gaudi might have made, twisty, curly, yellow. I remember saying "I hate this country's stairs", in reference to the fact that my own native country has plenty of hilly cities and towns, with plenty of stairs. I kept climbing the stairs and eventually reached a tier where there were floating platforms. Some sort of children were here, as if they played here everyday and one said to me "if you want to get to the other side, I'm afraid jumping is the only way". I looked around for another option, hanging close to the floor due to my fear, and indeed there was no choice. The fall was a big one, I knew this. Someone from behind me, one of the dream friends said something like "we're 50 stories high, don't look down!" and I think I told them to shut up, that I knew, and I strongly resisted the urge to look down and simply hopped to the first small stone platform that was floating above this gap. The floating stone platforms were different shapes, some hexagons, some circles. I hopped to the next one, closest to a doorway on the opposite side of where I first arrived at this tier. I don't remember going through. In another fragment, perhaps related to the last, I remember something in space, with asteroids and a space base, but not much else, unfortunately. This was one of the dreams I forgot by sitting up. Notes: Last night, when I went outside to our yard I saw one of our neighbour's cats sitting on the wall, and it is black and white and has a bell; it scurries off when it sees us, even though the cat is the one choosing to come into our yard.In the platform jumping area, the abyss or gap or whatever was actually quite small, as I realised by hopping to each platform; the platforms felt decidedly steady despite their floating nature. The initial apprehensive nature of my fear likely made the gaps seem much wider at first, especially considering a fall implied death, and therefore, great pain in the last seconds.It is of note that I hate many platforming games, as usually the combat mechanics annoy me to great deal, such as Super Mario.Although my fear of heights varies greatly in waking life, it usually comes before I'm at the location, because of the anticipation of the situation; whereas in the dream the onset was only sudden once I was on the stairs.I'm fairly certain these fragments were actually linked by some transition, but I cannot remember it.As the stairs went up, there were buildings to either side, but on the right there was a gap between the stairs and the buildings, whereas on the left side they were adjoined. There were no doors at all at any point. In my native country the stairs would be less steep (possibly made steeper by fear) and there would be tiers and doors every so often.The fact that I and my siblings were present all in one room, these days, is not statistically likely. This should have made me question reality.The fact the catfish meowed should have made me RC, because I realised that it was odd, that catfish don't meow. Edit: added a very rough 3D scene I quickly made (10-15mins) of the stairs dream scene.
Updated 07-22-2018 at 01:27 AM by 95293
July 13th- A youtube star that is short and lip syncs music was on a webcam video in front of me and he wanted to hang out but I didn't want to so I left. I came to a kitchen and my friends and I were cooking food. I put in 10 nuggets into an oven when I only wanted to put in 5 nuggets. 1 nugget fell off and caught on fire. I walked into a darker room off of the kitchen where there was a table with plates of food and my friend Jason was sitting there. One plate was mine that had a lot of food like vegetables that I didn't want. A guy named Jim was there and he sprinkled weed on some rice that was in an oval shaped bowl. I said that I didn't want to be high before class and he said that the weed didn't affect him. Then I was sitting at some outside bar place that was in downtown Richmond, Virginia at night. A pregnant girl from my high school named Kaitlin was there with one of my friends AK. She was talking about something and someone mentioned another pregnant girl named Haley and then she appeared. Kaitlin was stretching and sort of floating in the air because of AK and said that she'd have a miscarriage from moving like that. She started passing gas so I moved away disgusted. She said that she didn't smell that bad. Then a bartender asked if we wanted some drinks form behind us. I turned around as AK ordered a root beer which came in a plastic mug then. I asked what he got and then I got a coke. I looked at a menu that was hanging above our heads behind us and it had cost $2.01 which I was upset about because of the extra penny. I turned to my left and asked for coins from another friend named Alia which she gave me so I started counting it out. July 14th- Something about Show Choir in Atlee high school. Sitting in a hotel apparently waiting on a girl to come to stay with me but I don't know who it is. I'm in fear that it is a catfish. I go over to a computer to contact her. Now I'm in a hotel room looking her up when I see a text in a chat room on my computer screen that says "row row row your boat" and something like "should I bring the water." I immediately sense danger as I turned around to run out of the room. To the left is a bathroom with a man standing in a doorway. He's wearing jeans with a brown shirt. His head is shaved with a five o clock shadow beard. He's white. I start screaming "help" very quickly and loudly as I run for the open doorway but he grabs me and my screams become muffled and the dream fades to black. July 15th- I was at Rockbridge younglife camp. Well, that was the location anyways. I remember I was talking about getting back into Younglife and I was going to the gathering. It was held down at the lake in some cramped inflatable thing. I remember crawling out and thinking of squeezing like taking a dump. Sure enough, someone points out that I had actually crapped myself. I started to think my return to Younglife is ruined as I'm up the hill now where tall futuristic buildings are. Then, there was some sort of discovery where I was in a beam of yellow red and purple lights that made some sort of an epic tunnel of light in front of me. There was some voice saying that I had unlocked something and then I thought it was a phoenix sort of mount from World of Warcraft that I was supposed to keep hidden from other people seeing. July 16th- There was a lot of waking up before my alarm. The concept was something to do with Super Mario World and getting on a certain platform at the right time, the right time being when my alarm was supposed to go off. I forget what I was doing right before I woke up but it was finishing a process like finishing the telling of a story or something of that matter. It was the right/ expected time for my alarm to go off. July 17th- The scene was this space that seemed to go on forever in the background. The immediate area was an arcade with different dark consoles like racing games, a sort of pong game, and this game where you had to time going between swinging ladders. I played the ladder game for a little bit. The entrance was a path that led onto a beach with the ocean in the background. There were various groups of people spread out on the beach. I looked to my right down the beach and it stretched for miles in the sun. I said something like "it's so beautiful here." I was in the water but I was focused on a phone charger that was tangled. I was thinking that there were a lot of things holding me up from enjoying the beach. I went back to the sand to put my China phone down somewhere not sandy. I had a boogie board, some shirts and shoes, so I was placing my phone in various locations testing it out. Finally, I turn around to enjoy the beach, but the right side was now in the shade because it was around 6. My view went to the ocean as I thought that maybe sharks could've come and attacked someone. I decided that though there were at least 15 people in the ocean, I wasn't going back in since a shark would pick me to attack. So, I walked left down the beach which only stretched about 20 yards. At the end was a doorway opening to this room that was made of dark wood. It had doors coming off that had different numbers/ symbols on it. There was an asian guy with me now. I was asking him about the cost of a room. He was saying that no one had staying in the rooms for a while but they were expensive because in the background was the classic Shanghai skyline. My view went back to the ocean/beach where I wanted to take a picture of the skyline but I noted the air pollution was too bad.
Spectrum office/At home in the living room, watching the computer/TV. The "show" on the computer/TV seems to be a boy who is chatting on a computer, and seems to be showing him from a computer camera on top of the computer screen. Then I was in a mall. Or a shoe store, with a weird exit/entrance. I was with mom/sis. Someone's about to buy a veeery weird shoe, which is very high, and has red, strawberry-like design. I was walking in the city. Late afternoon. I met a person who I haven't seen before. He's an old man who's also a Wiccan, and we talked. He walked to his store, and he commented how I look a lot better (healthier). I told him I have minimized my smoking, since I only smoke if I'm in the company of smokers, which isn't very often. I remember animals pass by as we talked about this, from our right to our left, mostly ducks and some dogs. Upon arriving, we continued talking, and then he set up a food mix. With two live fish, and I think two live shrimp (all are bigger than normal ones) inside a plastic. They're all still moving slightly. The fishes are catfish, I think. The shrimps are brownish. Then there are also a mix of fruits and other stuff. The rest are mixes of fruits. I can recall the colors red (reminded me of strawberry) and orange/yellow (reminded me of pineapple), inside transparent plastic bags filled with white stuff. The whole thing reminded me of a salad. And cheese. Me mentioned cheese several times, adding it here and there. There's a "glass" where he "insert" inside the plastic and squeeze, "mixing" the whole thing, and then "putting" them back in their particular container. Seeing that the fishes and shrimps are still moving, and partially tearing the plastic, I asked for a bigger bag to put everything in. I think all of them are for a recipe, and also has magickal significance. Not sure what. I just accepted it. When I was about to leave, I asked for his number, and I wanted to make sure that I got it correctly, since it is very difficult to catch him. I recall it started with 0906, and then had 34 and 0, but I couldn't remember it all. ---- NOTES: - Afternoon dream - Raining, cold - Listening to Brian Mercer & Robert Bruce MAP week 2 morning affirmation - Woke up aware of what I'm doing and successfully returned to dream several times
A girl that I had picked up hitch hiking and I spent the night in an abandoned building. The next morning she asked if I would drive her to the main road. I headed down a dirt road and came to a rickety old bridge with a pier area on it. The bridge was only one lane and did not look very safe to cross. In the river below, I could see a large, dark shadow. Then I realized it was a giant catfish. I watched as the catfish came to the surface of the water. It's head came way out of the water and it grabbed the bridge with it's legs (It had legs like a sea robin.) It was so large that it's head went right over the top of the bridge. It looked around at the bridge, then slipped back into the water. I had heard about giant catfish, but I never thought they could get that big. This fish was big enough to swallow my car! I told the hitch hiker that there was no way I was going to cross that bridge. I told her if she would come back with me to the building that we had spent the night in, it would only take a few minutes for me to pack up my stuff and then I would find another way across the river. But the girl decided to take her chances and cross the bridge by herself. I stayed and watched until she made it across the bridge safely. Then I realized that there was no place for me to turn around at. I would have to pull into the pier area of the bridge and do a three point turn. I looked around for the catfish and did not see it. So I quickly pulled onto the bridge, did my three point turn and zipped out of there and back down the dirt road where I had come from. When I got back to the building I had spent the night in, I heard voices inside. I walked in and found a family setting up there belongings. I told them, that I came for my things and would be out of their way in a few minutes.
Morning of October 1, 1980. Wednesday. My main dream sequence was somewhat abstract and mostly involved looking around in an unusual store that was a distorted composite, with what was being sold together in the same store as such not making much sense. There are craft items, fishing tackle, and possibly school textbooks on certain shelves, and possibly food. However, the waking transition was very clear as it usually is and can easily be decoded. I am later fishing while standing on a roofed sidewalk. I am at the front of the store (facing east) but which also mainly looks like the entrance to my middle school in Florida. The parking lot has been replaced by a large body of water which comes up to the level of where the parking lot’s surface would otherwise be. This is where I am fishing. After a short time, I hook onto something that feels very heavy and large but does not fight that much. Soon however, a huge catfish slowly emerges from the surface of the water, slides on its stomach up onto the sidewalk and swallows an unknown chubby male (of perhaps forty) who had been standing about eight feet to my right. There is a sense of awe but I am also somewhat amused. I would rather experience coalescence autosymbolism by watching another (typically unknown and presumed fictional) dream character being swallowed than experience it as my dream self. This is otherwise autosymbolism for the illusory dream state being swallowed up by the conscious self identity and the distorted dream self coalescing back into consciousness. The parking lot is liminal space (autosymbolism for being in a specific level of unconsciousness between dreaming and waking), and water lowering waking symbolism eventually commences here as in many other dreams. An area of land being replaced by becoming the surface of a body of water has happened in a number of my dreams, and other people have reported this as well.
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