nightmare

It turned out to be intricately beautifully, i found myself running away from a faceless dark shadow around bellevue. The day was dark, almost night, i was not lucid. I remember entering my old house from childhood seeking refuge from this dark spirit, i found the house battered and destroyed, nothing to ease my anxiety from what was following me. I opened an old familiar drawer and there be the face of the deadly spirit, (unfortunately its face i cannot remember) gashing out and haunting me once more. in shock i run outside and attempt to get as far away from it as possible, i run as far on to the rode as i can and decide not to stop, but in the distance i see it waiting for me. a tear falls from my face, i cant get away. at that instant i remembered a fragment of the most powerful force in the universe, the one tied to love and happiness, it was acceptance. i stepped forward, grounded ready to face that which was unknown. in that instant a sudden paradoxical realization enters my awareness...this is impossible. i smile a lucid. but this was different then any other iv had before. vast energy was propelling itself inside me, my mind filtered simultaneously with all the limitless possibilities and i found that the shadow spirit was shrinking, a moment of identification made me realize that rather i was levitating. i looked upon the deadly spirit and felt sadness for it, as it was frantically attempting to suck me into its spiral of confusion. i understood that this spirit was me, but in its pure opposite, confused scared alone, filled with anxiety and panic. i developed a blue energy ball and hurled it into the spirit, it instantly changed color and dove into my chest, i felt one with the universe. i looked around at the beautiful landscape that i called home and felt endowed with the power to enter a different dimension. I bid promise to return to this landscape that i have grew to love in my waking state. and, with a shift of my awareness, i appeared in another reality, one that i cannot recall in detail, one that is indescribable, beyond that of human capabilities. i find that all that remains in the core feeling of what it was like. i recalled a movie phrase my cousin had said to be the previous day from pirates of the Caribbean "your off the edges of the map mate, here there be monsters", i smiled while levitating over this new world and dove in at light speed... the adventures i had from their i cannot completely recall... and my memory fades from there. i understood how this dream was teaching me to deal with current life situations, i woke with a smile and confidence to go through the days stress ahead.this a new level of dreaming and look forward to exploring it more as my days continue.
omnipresence.

I am at my parent's old house. It's dark outside and windy. There is a vicious growl outside. I peer outside the side door (which does not have a window in real life, but has a curtained window in this dream). There is a large, scary dog down the porch steps. I can't see it too clearly because it is so dark outside and windy. I check the door's lock. I have a dreaded feeling that our puppy, Jack (a dog my sister once had) is outside on the porch. Sure enough, he is outside, tide to the porch rails. I fear that the light switch won't work. It's an old-fashioned two button switch (in real life a normal light switch was beside the door). The light does not come on. For a moment, I consider that it is an odd coincidence that everything I predict will happen seems to come true (almost a lucid moment, but not quite). I am so fearful for the puppy and terrified of the large dog at the same time. I wake up in a panic.

I dream that I have sleep paralysis. I need to get up and check the doors and locks. I roll out of bed and crawl along the floor. I can feel the carpet, the walls and doors as I make my way around my apartment. I feel very heavy and lethargic. Every so often I feel my eyes open and I can see my pillow. I'm still in bed, but I can feel the apartment as I grope around to check the locks on the doors. I somehow know my body is moving around the apartment but my mind is stuck in bed. Maybe I'm imagining my movement around the apartment but am stuck in bed.

The whole thing was a dream, but I had several false awakenings in it. I would "realize" I was still in bed, stuck in sleep paralysis in my dream and then crawl around again to check the locks. After a minute, I would realize I was still in bed, unable to to really move. The whole process started over several times. It gave me a very paranoid and fearful sense of my situation, like I was in danger and unable to do anything about it. I felt unsure what was real and if I was awake or not.

I dreamed that I took two testicular exams and one of my testicles had a small lump. I'm not sure what events unfolded (Or if that dream had ended), but I found myself in a car with a bunch of friends. It was really dark outside, and we were in the outskirts of the city. I think we were driving in a forest.

And that's all I could remember. But I do know during the driving that something heroic happened. I can't remember what it was.

This was the first dream that stayed in my head for a while until I got interested in lucid dreaming.

As the title suggests, there was a killer on the loose. As the dream went on, I found all of my friends were getting murdered by this fiend.

At the end of the dream, I walked into a restaurant. It looked more like a very old hotel. The place was dimly lit. The fact that the place was made out of wood didn't help matters much either. There were lights in the building, and yes, they were light bulbs. However, they were covered by frosted glass and were installed on the wall. There were also lights hanging from the ceiling. They were shining on the tables.

Anyway, I was reading a newspaper and as I read it, I realized I was the killer's next victim. I immediately noticed the killer was already in the building along with me. Panicking, I ran around the restaurant and ran up the stairs. And that's when I woke up. The end.

I'm talking with Niri, an old friend from high school. She mentions she's at this hotel in this strange city because Adam is presenting a paper at a conference here. She says she met him a number of years ago and now she wants to have a baby on her own and is hoping that he will be the father this weekend. I feel very jealous. I ask, "Can we share him?" She evaluates this, and asks how long it's been since I've seen him. I don't want to tell her it's 20 years, lest she quote a smaller number and claim priority. I realize I want to have his baby too - to my surprise. I hadn't thought I'd want a baby. But I now realize how perfect the combination of his and my DNA would be.

I'm in an apartment suite with Adam. I know I have to leave for my first day at high school, so I try to find my clipboard and a bathroom. I can only find an exposed toilet in my bedroom, and as he's coming to poke his head in, joking about how the room is in a different city and the weather is so nice at my end of the suite, he points out another bathroom behind a closed door. I go in and notice it's all stocked up with paper supplies and there's a whole cupboard of fresh bread - this turns out to be a laundry room.

I go to the school and find a table outside. The woman there says, "You're late!" I look and notice my slip is the only one left. I do the paperwork and get my list of classes. As usual in these dreams, the first class is history (that's always the class I've missed all year and suddenly have an exam in). I go to class and I'm yelled at for being late. I leave the class and decide to skip it to buy all my books and go chill in the cafeteria.

Bits of this morning's dream (last vestiges of a Clonazepam sleep):

I'm making popcorn in my wok. Clearly I haven't thought this through, because I don't have a cover big enough for it. The popcorn and the oil start flying all over the kitchen, and I'm afraid my mom's about to come in and start yelling at me again for making a mess, or slapping me as she used to do whenever she was "tired". (I've actually been living on my own for 21 years and I could certainly take down my 70-year-old mother in a physical fight. I only recently started making my own popcorn and I frequently burn it.)

As I'm trying to cover it up, we shift to an establishing shot of the building I'm in - a gas station/diner - and then to a computer screen where I'm getting an email from a guy who in real life has just asked me out for the 17th time. I'm not interested in him, and I've told him repeatedly that I'm busy, and this last time he asked me out I finally told him I had a boyfriend. (I don't, but often a persistent man will finally leave you alone if he thinks he'll have to deal with another male instead of just trying to wear YOU down.) He had responded nastily - "Okay what a weird response, I wasn't asking you out, I was just asking you for coffee!!!!!" (Creepy.) In this dream, the same email exchange occurs, but in addition to this nastygram from him, he includes a series of symbol characters (as in smileys or winkies and stuff like that) that, when looked at sideways, look like Mr. Knox from Fox In Sox with an erection.

Ew. But I do wish I could remember the sequence of characters....

September 03, 2011

Forgot the last two dreams but funny enough remember the first two.

Dream 1:

I was in my old bedroom which have a bump bed. I notice my remotes were on my dresser I had a little bitching moment and place them in their rightful place. I turn on the TV and it must been late as my brother in bed was complaining. It was a new episode of Futurama about everyone having a clone which in this case was a cat--face clone.

This was a total ripoff of the real episode about the two boxes paradox. Anyway beside Fry being mostly one color and Bender was mostly green it was pretty close to the same.

I was going to bed seeing a monkey under the sheets. After that it got kinda fuzzy.

I only remember the idea of "which bump you slept in could totally effect you later..." for example a fat blond ugly Leela was somehow a choice if she slept on the wrong bump.

Seem like my life would been the same either way but if my bro slept on top then his life greatly improved.

A weird dream that only make sense while you are in it.

Dream 2:

Embarrassing dream that I not even going to write on my private journal.

At one point I start thinking about dreaming in general like I often do in life. Of course I knew this was a dream but I decided to look at my right hand. At that point the dream character disappear and what used to be a building became a dark forest. I flew like I often do when lucid but I saw a man turn into a wolf. Not a werewolf.

If anyone been reading these then you know I don't have any real fears but I HATE being chased. I flew as fast as I could but he was on my tail then to my right. I said "fuck this" and woke up.

So annoying...

I had two other dreams (not fragments) so my recall is coming back.

IMPORTANT DATES:
08/31/11 -- Started my Dream Journal!

CURRENT GOALS:
[ ] Find a lucid-inducing technique that works for me
[ ] Attain Lucidity

4th Entry:
Date: 09/03/11
Sleep Times: Approx. 12:30/1:00-9?. 9?-11:43(?).

I can't remember for the life of me the memory I had just had before! I had recalled my dream from the second sleep-cycle, figured out the details in my head, repeated it so it would stick, but ONE PHONE CALL took it all away from me! This is very depressing for me, indeed. However, from what I do know it was a mockery of my daily life- it wasn't that exciting. I remember it taking place in my current house. However, past that I can't remember a single detail besides multiple scene-settings that could've given birth to it. HOWEVER, I have also gained the memory of a DIFFERENT dream from the FIRST sleep cycle that because of its content I see as more valuable. I woke up smelling lavender (I was suffereing a runny/congested nose last night and I was drinking lavender tea to feel better. Great home cure, btw. To fix those nasal symptoms, a strong-smelling herbal tea mixed with honey to keep a soothed throat, sugar for taste, and another strong smelling herb- for me personally, cinnamon, is an amazing tasting cure!) and this triggered a different dream memory for me. For those of you who read my DJ, you may recall my first posted entry (for those who don't read my DJ, see "LudoSiren's Adventure Time") which involved a man in a black suit. Let's call him Twisted!Colton. I remember waking up in a field wearing a white dress. I can, at this point, tell you the design and the feel of the dress in detail, essentially. As I do not want to take the time to draw, scan, and upload it, I will merely supply a google-searched pictue of it at the end of this entry. In the field, I could smell lavender and a few other herbs. The sky and everything were beautiful and I felt at peace. However, I looked up to see just beyond that Twisted!Colton was nearby. Above him, there seemed to be a darkening sky and a sort of sadness about him. I have come to realize now something about him- he has been creeping in every one of my dreams! I missed that he could've been my dream sign!! (If, albeit, this wasn't a false implanted memory.) I had the pleasure of seeing his beetle-juice like tongue, in the sense that it was very long and resembled a worm. Upon seeing his face, I got up and ran as fast as I could. I can't remember much interaction going on between us, but I remember him trying to act gentle and calm, regardless of a violent and insane nature and the way he was crawling on the ground and even on the sky like a man possessed. I fell, and remember him creeping up to me and looking in my eyes. I think he may have licked the side of my face, and I can't remember if he had succeeded, but tried to put something either in my hand of tuck it behind my ear.
All I remember hearing is him say something trying to get me into submission. Thinking about it, it reminds me of the line from the movie Labyrinth, where at the end the Goblin King Jareth (played by David Bowie says to the heroine, Sarah, the following lines:
"Everything that you wanted I have done. You asked that child be taken, I took him. You cowered before me and I was frightening. I have reordered time, I have turned the world upside down, and I have done it all for you! I am exhausted from living up to your expectations of me. Isn't that generous?...
I ask for so little. Just let me rule you, and you can have everything that you want....
Just fear me, love me, do as I say, and I will be your slave."
I think it was something along the lines of a menancing, "Stay...." all I can hear clearly in my mind is him saying "Forever..." at one point. But I don't think the message was supposed to carry to waking life. As I recall the dream it seems to become fake in a way....But at the same time, I know it was real. The one picture that never gets touched by this sense is the picture of him standing in the field and him in my face. Is it a subconcious thought that maybe my subconcious feels I can't handle in waking life? I'm not sure. If anyone is better at dream understanding and the possible cross-link it carries with spiritual/paranormal/psychological matters that I feel it may undertone, PM me and I am more than willing to answer any questions.

END ENTRY

(PS: The promised dress-picture: Yep folks, it was almost an exact copy of the classic Marilyn Monroe dress. The only differences were that the skirt was a bit shorter- probably about a knee length (above or below, give or take), and it was more like a V-neck as it did better cover my cleavage.)

Once again, I had multiple dreams. The first dream was during the night. The location was on some sort of colony ship in space. Most of the people in it had evacuated due to something happening. I am not sure what it was, but it was probably due to mutated killer animals running loose and killing people. I remember I was hiding with 2 other people. We were underneath the floor in some sort of maintenance room. One man was saying something along the lines of " If we survive this, this would make such a great Sci-Fi movie.". Of course, after saying that, a mutated tiger monster thing reached down from somewhere and ate him almost whole. Using that as a distraction, I was able to get away.

Another dream, I was sen to the store to get a few things. Arriving at what I thought was Kroger, I went up to this main counter thing, and had to get a number. Once a number was called, we could go in. My number was 300. O_o Looking around, I could see that this place was far more than a grocery store. Connected to it was also like some sort of casino type place for some reason. I remember after talking to a few people about pretty much boring stuff, or asking about how to just get some stupid groceries, I gave up, gave my ticket to some random passerby, and left.

My final dream was more along the lines of a nightmare. I recall seeing some little kid come out of a dark room crying and being extremely frightened. I am not sure where this was, but I decided to face what was in there. In the room, now with the lights on, were a few mirrors, and a door leading in, and another leading out. I did not see what the deal was, so I turned out the lights. Standing there for a few seconds, nothing happened. But turning around, I could have sworn I saw a face in my peripheral vision. Startled, I quickly turned toward it, seeing the mirror that was now dimly glowing. The figures became more clear, they were like very angry souls. I attempted to flee, but it was like my whole body was paralyzed, I could not even yell for help. Then things got weird. If I recall correctly, it was like looking into a mirror reflecting a mirror, seeing infinitely and filling my whole vision. I could hear the screaming of the shadowy people getting loud, At some point, I think I managed to make it to the door, when I woke up. At least I thought I did. I believe I had a few false awakenings before I finally woke up.

Okay, so last night I went to sleep at about 23:30, and fell asleep at about 00:00.
My alarm was set to 06:00, but I woke up at 05:00. I turned around and looked at the clock, then went back to sleep. I had some weird fucked up dream, then I woke up again. 05:03. Back to sleep. Dream. Wake up. 05:07.
Repeat this until 05:30 and some serious strange shit happened.
So I woke up, turned around to look at the clock (05:30), then while I turned back over I thought "30 minutes left. That's like 1 dream per minute". Immediately I heard a voice angrily yell "NO". Before I could think "What?" I got hit by extremely violent vibrations in my eyes, which were looking upwards at the ceiling. My body was completely paralyzed, I couldn't move. Along with my vision shaking, I also heard an extremely loud sound of about 1000 bunsen burners mixed with a bunch of static bass.

AS IF THIS WASN'T ENOUGH
While I was looking at the ceiling, I saw flashes of white/light-blue light come from my television as if it was burning with weirdly colored flames, and I heard this song.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gtqwdXQStS4



It all ended and I was there, in my bed, completely shocked and bathed in sweat.
It was not a dream, because I didn't wake up, I even pinched my nose and tried to breathe (a reality check) to make sure.

I didn't sleep for the last 30 minutes after that, before I had to get up and ready for work.
I was shocked out of my mind for 1:30 hour after that.

WHAT




F*CK SLEEP PARALYSIS D:

Right, so I remember several dreams nearly every night, and they are always fairly involved, a lot of imagery and breaking down the happenings of the day. A lot of them have concerned me, and of course I take them all seriously, but I don't want everyone I know to have to hear about another, so here is a nightmare of sorts that I had.
(before sleeping i was insistent on keeping the kitchen light on in the apartment I live in, and slept on the sofa which is close to the kitchen light)
The Dream:
In my dream, I was in my old house which was recently sold. I lived there with my mother and father before their divorce, it was a very nice place, but sold as a result of the divorce. So a lot of karma and whatnot is related to it, plus, it is my quintessential home place.
I was in my parents' bedroom, but i was on a futon with a white down comforter and sleeping with a fluffy cat that would fuss in the covers. I fell asleep, with this really bright light on to keep safe. But I woke up when this uber bright incandescent yellow tinted orb (golf ball sized) when into me, under my skin, and started speaking to me creepily, but it was mostly the sensation I felt which was like it was a dark message, a dark bulb/light, and it really disturbed the muscles in my side where it was lodged.
I got up, and by the front door was my friend/ex-friend who was sleeping on the ground, and I lifted up my shirt from the area on my right abdomen where this orb thing was, (I felt like a message was carved) and he said something along the lines of "you should look at this in the mirror" and then my dad was there and he looked at it too and said "you should really take a look at this, it says ''you are (nothing more than) a worthless human grave" or something like that.
(Then I woke up, turned off the kitchen light because it was a lot like light in my dream, went back to bed)
Now in my next dream I was at the house my mother now lives/works at, sleeping on her couch (maybe parallel to fact I was sleeping on apartment couch) and it was dark, but not scary. Then, I got a picture text on my clunky cell phone of some (plastic/decorative/holiday) of some skulls from my old sold house, as if to reiterate the message of dying/grave/whatever.

I also half remember seeing these two little girls that I know in real life, who have huge eyes, they have showed up in my dreams sometimes. I used to be/am still timid of them. they were in the kitchen in my mom's current residence

My thoughts/information to reader: I have had a lot that I'm keeping secret lately, and had some bad eating habits and have just checked out socially. I've also been paranoid about my ears and neck. I've been feeling very emotionally dead in terms of happy feelings.
I would like some help. What in the fuck could this mean? I think it has to do with me going uphill from my downhill lifestyle lately, or maybe I am just going down some more. (I've had full blown precognitive dreams before, or just intuitive/informational ones about people and places and what they are related to me. So maybe I am going to through something tough? Or through rebirth? or should i be concerned?)

thank you

Ok so, i only remember 2 dream fragments from my childhood.... one was a nightmare the other i was lucid and fighting ninjas

-nightmare-
all i remember was being terrafied every night from this dream, it was 4 faces, demonic looking... kinda cool to be honest, and it was really dark, and lots of screaming as if someone was being tortured in the background. then i woke up... im sure there was more but i was like 8.. this may have bin what made me go lucid for my next fragment, or its a totally other dream... i have no idea

-Lucid ninja fighting -

Ok, this was my first, and ONLY lucid, i dont count it in my lucid count because i was like 8 and had no idea i could even do that... infact for all these years i thought i couldent dream anymore xD so it was a small japanese like road with temple looking building in the background and it looked kinda like the buildings in afro ninja looked like and there where ninjas, they wore straw hats and blue and black clothing... then i kicked there asses. xD thats all i remember

In this segment of the dream, I've just managed to pry a bat off my shoulderblade. (Note: I have chronic pain in my shoulderblade and last night, for the first time, I tried an Icy Hot patch on the area. It seemed to be making my bed cold and wet whenever I woke up during the night, so I was worried about it.) I've also seen a mini-bat, a sort of cross between a black bat and a dragonfly, slip under the door to try to get to me. Then I feel sharp pains in my left shoulder. (Note: The Icy Hot Patch is on my right.) It feels like something is biting me. When I turn around, I see that there is a snake looking up at me from the floor. She's a pale-orangey kind of colour, the colour of a cake baked with orange zest. (Note: I'd baked madeleines the other day and part of the recipe called for orange zest, and I'd been unsure whether that meant all of the orange peel or just the inner flesh under the peel, so that had worried me.) The snake is looking intently at me as if she's on a mission. I try to shoo her away. I try to run away. She keeps getting to me and rhythmically striking at me - in the same spot. She finally says to me, "Look, I'm trying to help you. I need to give you the scars for the electrolysis." I think about it for a moment, but I don't know what she means. I'm not even planning to get electrolysis done. So I continue to run away. She always catches up with me. When I get out of the house - which looks a lot like my grandmother's house from when I was a kid - I'm finally rid of her. I go around to the back to get into the kitchen, which I do from an upper window. The people in the cast of my film are there, cooking on the stove, and Aunt Janet from the Road to Avonlea series is there baking. Aunt Janet starts to scream bloody murder when she sees me come in. The ceiling corners above me are dirty and covered with strands of cobwebs.

So this first part was related to a book a was reading at the time. Just clearing that up.


As we launched into outer space, with a brilliant, glowing blue curve of earth outside one window, claustrophobia engulfed me, I heard the narration say. Stupid telepathic narrator, I thought. Suddenly, the dream skipped, and we were on a collision course with earth, and I was outside of the space ship doing some kind of vital repair, but I lost my tools, so I went back to the ship, but my umbilicus snapped, and I was drifting off toward earth. Before I knew it, I had entered the thermosphere, and was burning up on entrance. Instead of struggling, I knew my momentum was to great to escape, so I accepted my death. It would be short. But as central Africa rushed up towards me, I my dream paused, then I viewed my body in third-person, my space suit was half dissolved and perhaps there mas some burning flesh, but on my vision was a 'Game Over' screen identical to the one in MC.

But no, said the narration. You won't die, because you are in a dream, stupid.

Then I may have woken up, or it may have been a false awakening, it was hard to tell, but I decided to try and pull a DEILD real fast. So I went back to sleep, it was easy, but I held on to one though; 'This is a dream'.

I appeared on the patio of my house, and I was lucid. Hey, I thought. Lucid dream, it's about time. An assassin with some kind of rifle appeared about ten meters to the left of me, but as he took aim, I kicked him from a distance, in the stomach. Then I ran at a very fast rat down my driveway, thinking, Hmm. This probably won't last very long. So I rubbed my hands, all that jazz. But I stopped next to my dad's car, at the sight of an old lady, my instincts said she was important. She was watching me, from the other side of the street. I car passed, and she disappeared the fraction of a second I couldn't see her behind the car, and she reappeared five meters in front of me.

"You shouldn't be able to do that." She rasped, obviously referring to how I air-kicked the assassin. She was wearing a black cloak and scarf. She seemed to have a rash on her face, it was covered in bumps. She had brownish blond hair, and pale blue eyes, that seemed metaphorically dark.

"You shouldn't be able to do that," She said again, slowly moving towards me. I tried to fight, but she blocked all my throws. Not one of the best choices I could have made, I should have just flown away. Or atleast set my hands on fire.

Other people appeared, and circled me, all slowly advancing. "You shouldn't be able to do that," They all said. I got the feeling they wanted me to wake up, or something bad would happen. So as they were almost on top of me, chanting, I woke myself up.

I lay in my bed, first thought being, 'You freaking idiot.'