• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views




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    1. cccxcv. "Chapeling", Red hand portal, Dithering at a car park

      by , 07-07-2022 at 03:00 PM
      2022 June 21st

      Fragment:

      Me and H travel to a place called Chapeling that's apparently near London in southern England. It's a 300 mile drive from where we were? We go there to have a look at this small pipe organ that sits in a little chapel building which is beside a main church building.

      Overcast day outside. Town streets and so on.


      2022 June 22nd

      Fragment:

      Something about showing someone a little organ. At some kind of concert or theatre hall, a vast one at that, but the wood all seems very bare like all its polish has worn off and nobody has taken care of the place for a while.

      (recall gap)

      Something about needing to get some homework done. I have my black laptop bag with me and whatever I need for my homework is in there I think. I keep being distracted or pulled away from doing it and later I am climbing some kind of abstract structure made up of large red long nailed bony hands. It's part of some kind of dimensional portal or threshold.

      Later, on the other side of said portal. Something about Warcraft 3 game mechanics. I want to buy a mini town hall item and destroy a human settlement to take their gold mine.


      2022 June 25th

      Fragment:

      I'm outside, at a Lidl car park. It's about seven in the morning and it's light but not as bright as it should be for this time of the year. I'm deciding whether I should get closer and do some shopping or not. There's a white man in the parking lot. He's getting some stuff ready round the back of his car. At some point I realise the shop won't be open for another hour at least. I dither about for a while, wondering if I should bother crossing the road and going back home or if I should just wait it out. I think it may have felt a bit cool outside.



      Notes:

      - Trying to look for a place called "Chapeling" somewhere near London didn't really result in anything. I suspect the location name in the dream was simply tied to the context of the attached chapel. I've not heard the word before, not in any situation that I can think of anyway, but it's a fairly straightforward construction and likely easily created by automatic and associative dream logic and the like.

      - Unfortunately, I've lost any visual recall I might have had of the abstract structure made up of red hands, which is a shame really because these are often the type of things I like to try and recreate in art. I might still try recreating something alike if I can think of a composition I like.
      -- I still have some visual recall of the rest of the dreaming in this entry, at the time of writing.

      - For some reason I've come to use dithering as an expression more often of late; it's not a new expression to me, but it's not one I've typically used a lot.
    2. Failed dream stabilisation in DILD | [26.05.2022]

      by , 05-28-2022 at 02:23 AM (Draeger's Dream Journal and Documentation)
      Failed dream stabilization in DILD
      I am on my way home, carrying groceries on the sidewalk of the quiet street passing by the house I live in on a cloudy day with a darker lighting of the environment suggesting that the time of day is soon to be or already is dusk. I'm not sure if my mother is with me, but she could be. Suddenly, I become lucid. It might have been a random thought about lucidity which triggered this. But I immediately start slipping out of the dream but try to rub my hands and to look at them to stabilize the dream, but I am already on the threshold of waking up, strangely controlling both my dream and real body at once, but apparently my stabilization attempt soon failed and I find myself having waken up.



      I got too stressed to journal again. I'll probably continue for real once summer holidays come around in nearly exactly a month.

      I actually chanted a mantra and used a special thought technique I can't really explain to kind of bypass the way you'd usually have this only incubate a fake lucid dream instead of actually causing awareness, and I guess it worked. It's like I went "behind" the normal thought? Only I really know what I'm talking about with that, I guess, at least I hope at least I will if I rediscover this some time. Nobody ever understood the way I explained how my brain worked. People tend to think these are metaphors, but I feel like I physically navigate my thoughts. While that's not what happens, of course, that's the input I'm getting and doing the same "movement" produces consistent results. It's weird like that. Also, I'm tired so I'm rambling about this, probably mostly as a big note to self so that I can reproduce this, since this is the first time a technique just straight up worked first try to that extent.

      I do wonder why the stabilization didn't work, though. And I tend to always find myself kind of "blind" in dreams, I've noticed that here as well. It's like my whole vision is covered by a blind spot, like how your thumb disappears if you move it into the right location, it makes it hard to stay in a dream. I feel like I only know some of the visual information because I just kind of know without seeing it, and that's annoying me. But I can't say reality is a whole lot different, honestly. My perception is always weirdly "blind" like that, like a very insidious form of tunnel vision. Enough rambling now. I still think this was probably the closest I've ever gotten to stabilize a lucid dream, so overall, this was a success. Good.
    3. ccclxxxii. The abandoned compound with strange animals and gems, New developments behind home

      by , 05-09-2022 at 11:20 AM
      2022 May 3rd

      Dream:

      I'm somewhere with H, at or near some kind of compound. His dad or a friend of his dad's is around too. There's something about precious stones in the compound, they spawn at random and in areas inhabited by some unusual creatures. It's not a nature reserve or anything like that, it's more like it's been abandoned despite still being apparently owned by someone. One of these strange creatures is a cat thing, the size of a dog and with more legs. It wants scratches but I'm wary of it, as it also wants to escape if given a chance, so I'm mindful about the door and my position. I consider that these animals may all be dangerous.

      I find one of the stones nearby and I leave. I somehow know it's worth 100K or so. I tell H and I feel proud and relieved, since it will be a huge help to us. I think to myself that we should make sure people aren't needlessly making this place known publicly or we won't even get a chance to get some more stones when we need the money.

      Later, a group of people who had also been getting gemstones is near an exit area. One of the people in the group is D, old school friend. Most of them seem a bit greedy, having hoarded many stones, rather than just getting one or two. I say to them that I can't see why they can't be more reasonable, and that I would always try to compromise when possible.

      (recall gap)

      Some other bit, also in some complex?


      2022 May 4th

      Dream:

      (Left recall a bit late)

      I'm at home with H. We go into the kitchen to do something. We're naked? I open the blinds and see a bunch of the neighbourhood kids out the back, some on the walls, others in the yard itself. (Quick note, this actually happened four days later, on the 8th)

      We motion from inside for them to get out and such, and then we go out a side door from the kitchen to the back, where the heart should have been. I lose track of H. In the yard, I see that some of the kids look a bit miserable, they're stuck in here by accident and I now feel sorry for them, and less upset about the fact they're here.

      Then, the back wall changes when I'm not paying attention. It's a cut-down wooden fence and I see loads of people around, playing around, having BBQs and so on. To my right, I see that we're on a sort of large plateau area and there are new apartment buildings in this area, some still being built. About twenty story high each. One has a green-ish and white colour scheme going. It's no wonder there are so many people here, I now feel. I feel annoyed and get into a sort of argument with a random woman, I think she was someone from school. As a character, I express confusion at all this and feel neglected. I ask why they built all this, why didn't the local authority let us know about any of it? And so on. I get unsatisfactory replies and just feel more and more frustrated.

      Later. At a supermarket inside a larger mall. (Like one in A but bigger) Initially I'm with H but then we split up because I need to go swap some pasta cheese ice cream thing. It looks like it has a blue cheese in it. Then, that woman from before again, she shows me some chocolate ice cream like knock-off Magnums. I try a sample or something, and so does she.
    4. ccclxi. Overly friendly woman, discussions, food decisions, Moving painting

      by , 02-27-2022 at 09:03 PM
      Unfortunately, for one reason or another, I keep falling back on my backlog of dreams that I want to put up on this DJ. This is annoying me a bit so I better get back to catching up on myself.


      2nd January 2022

      Some in-line bracketed notes.

      Dream:

      I'm in a version of my current bedroom. The window is across the way from the bed, rather than being to a side. It's sunny and the curtains are open. There's a slightly portly man walking around the room, going on about what was discovered about pork meat, saying he should have known all along and that he was glad he didn't have too much of it in his life. I feel there's some irony considering his physical appearance. (at the time of this dream, I think I felt this had something to do with eating what I like while I can)

      (recall gap)

      Then, in a car outside with H. Again, sunny, clear and bright. We're talking? It's a busy place, in a cobbled street. Looks like certain areas in L. A scantily dressed woman waves at me with a smile from a third floor window. I wave back and say hi quietly, wondering why she was being so friendly, but further thinking that she probably just found me attractive. (not something I've ever thought about regarding someone looking at me)

      Other minor and random interactions in the scope of friendliness with other characters. Me and H talk a bit more. Then, I'm outside the car.

      I'm sort of standing at the midway point of a crossing that people are using. I'm still within talking distance of H and eventually we agree on something and I walk off. (much recall detail was lost, everything was fairly lively)

      (recall gap)

      Then, at a supermarket. I'm walking around trying to find something nice for us to have for lunch, even though some part of me remembers (false memory) making some sandwiches in buns. I end up finding a pastry aisle and I see some meat pasties which I'm interested in getting. I'm not sure where I should put them. I ask an attendant about bags or anything and she says "no, sorry" or something, and I realise that she doesn't actually speak much English. I walk back to the pastries area and eventually spot some paper bags cramped under something. Then, when I grab some they are actually cut out plastic bottles, though I don't realise this during the dream.

      I use two to find two meat pasties which are now in some slick plastic cases and stuff them in the bottles. While I'm walking about I see a load of people at an entrance door and then they're all looking around the aisle. I realise on some level they're students.

      (I woke up at some point and I remember falling asleep thinking about how I didn't realise I was dreaming with the previous night's dreams)


      9th January 2022

      Fragment:

      In old home kitchen. I grab off the counter some ten by ten printed canvas which is wrapped in heatshrink (clear?). On the canvas is a young man and a woman, they're sitting on a boat or something and there's water behind them. They're family somehow; my nephew/niece, but older? She's sitting and wearing a white dress and a broad white hat. She has golden loop earrings. He's standing and wearing something darker, black or navy. Everything in the painting is moving slightly, the waves are alive and the two are looking towards the point of view and smiling.

      (this dream was especially vivid in my mind at the time for a while and the idea of a canvas with moving imagery was very exciting at the time)
    5. cccxlix. Poor package delivery service, Diablo II character armour

      by , 01-18-2022 at 06:47 PM
      15th November 2021

      Fragment:

      Outside on our street. I am coming to see H, who's arriving in the van. He's parked on the opposite side of the road. It's dark outside, but doesn't seem like it's either night or day? I pick up a delivery that was left for us on the pavement, rather than through the door. I open the van passenger door and talk to H about the package and how I find what they did to be annoying. Someone's on the passenger seat, maybe H's sister, A?

      Just before this, I'm in the front room doing something and the light is on. I think the curtains are open?

      Earlier, some bit on Diablo II where I'm checking how different armour plates look on the barbarian (looks more realistic than he should?).
    6. 10 Jan: Home invaders, chased by Kylo Ren and accidentally act in a novela

      by , 01-10-2022 at 10:28 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      At home, but it looks like my paternal grandma's house. I hear suspicious noises, I go check the backdoor, see if it is locked. It is not even closing properly, but I manage to shut it. Then my mom says she hears the elevator stopping at every floor, so that means we are actually at her house, not grandma's.
      Someone knocks, they say it's delivery of a package, but sounds suspicious. My mom says "Ah, ok" and goes open the door. I yell "no!", but it is too late. Some dude hands over a package and she thanks him. But then he steps in and I know he ain't no good, so I tell him to leave immediately and push him over. Outside are more guys. At first I manage push the first guy back, but the door ain't closing well and they barge in. I panic, but they don't actually resort to violence or seem intent to rob or rape. It's a gang of 3 dudes and a couple girls. They are basically tricksters and just want to fool around, for now. They go around checking our things and I think about what could be valuable and important to me and I try to hide those things. But they spread around to cover more area and I can't keep up. The house is magically very big and has half a dozen halls, each one dedicated to a specific thing, almost like a supermarket with aisles. First area is a library, then there is one for sports, one for entertainment, with a dj and vj set (which attracts the gang leader in particular), then there is an armory, which I try to reach first. But they get there ahead of me and grab some riffles. Fortunately the bullets are all elsewhere and they want to know where. I keep quiet and the leader guy gives up and goes for a different strategy. Goes to the entertainment area and grabs some equipment and starts singing. Then he becomes Pedro A., a musician I loved as a teen. He goes all charming and tries to seduce me. I say his charm won't work on me. So then they decide to go violent and I kick one of them, tell them I am a purple belt in Kenpo and can defend myself. They seem mildly scared but that quickly fades. They know I am very outnumbered. I am also not confident at all in my skills, I don't practice for years. But I find a stick and I attack them with it, knocking them all unconscious, except for a girl. I ask my mom - which I didn't see until now - to help me tie them up. When they regain consciousness, I tell them I am calling the cops and I ask for their names so I can tell the cops. They get very pissed.

      I meet Kylo Ren. He drives a small car. I start flirting with him. He misunderstands and thinks I am harassing him. He gets upset and chases me. I fly away to escape. I fly along the path of the road until I spot some people taking a shortcut through some field and I decide to folllow them and maybe lose Kylo who is after me. The shortcut takes me to a football field where kids are playing. Then just to the side is a neighborhood, which has a familiar vibe to it. I recognize my mom's building among other buildings inthis neighnorhood. I lift off to the 4th floor, to enter the house through the window. But then I spot there is a wood storage at ground floor and I go back to get some as I recall we need wood for the fireplace (which doesn't really exist at my mom's, but anyway...). When collecting some wood, I get caught in the middle of some actors filming a novela. They don't stop because of my presence and so I become accidentally part of it. I leave the wood for later, now I suddenly feel like baking a cake in the novela's kitchen. I grab some eggs and flour and I temporarily put them down on top of the washing machine because they are blocking my passage to the counter. The actors are playing a very rich family who is fighting over properties and possesions and I guess I am their cook. The flour bag is leaking and the machine dirty with flour. The family also sees it and scolds me for it. The head of the family says that shit might damage the machine which is expensive and it will be on me any repairs or replacement needed. And I am like "Damn, they can afford all the machines they want and are seriously making me pay for it. How petty."

      Updated 04-08-2022 at 09:17 AM by 34880

      Categories
      non-lucid
    7. cccxxxviii. Games, Pressured by others, Decision made without consulting me

      by , 10-31-2021 at 02:39 AM
      4th October 2021

      Scraps:

      (a long dream, but poor recall)

      Some RTS segment and I recall beaches and water.

      One part a bit Minecraft-like or some other game. T is here and someone else is with me? Some kind of tower, or otherwise large structure.

      One of the last parts of the dream, I am my alter-ego and there are interactions with me as such. The other people are dream-generated. They seem to be pressuring me, or something? Despite my form, I feel slightly shorter than others.

      Some other dream? H has convinced mom and dad to bring S over here. I think H goes to pick them up and I remember seeing them all at one point. I feel concerned about S because of all the usual reasons regarding costs and also because of the long trip.

      Notes:


      - The last part was certainly a reflection of how I sometimes don't feel listened to or validated on, regarding both matters of money and of companionship. In the segment, some beliefs I hold as very important are partly betrayed by my closest, besides the fact I feel it may be detrimental to both S's health and to my financial situation.

      - That same segment probably also relates to how I have often been very easily upset by changes to what a situation is and changes to what it would be or would have been.

      - More recently it has been more frequent for me to take on my alternate form in my non-lucid dreams. In this case, the context likely relates to my art and some perception that the expectations of others are above my own. My stature is clearly metaphorical in regards to my feelings in terms of recognition, but this dream element also relates directly to some of my choice themes and how I've often felt physically inadequate in some specific areas (primarily to my own expectations) when compared to others.
      -- I do not recall what exactly the other people were pressuring me about, but in terms of my waking life contexts, art is the most directly relevant context here.
    8. cccxxi. Minefield, Special Lego piece

      by , 08-30-2021 at 10:55 AM
      24th August 2021

      Fragment:

      At a place outside. It's sunny, looks a bit like my native country. Sort of dry grass and possibly some forest in the distance. I'm at or near some old concrete slabs, partially covered by dirt, sand and grass. There's a very tidy and organised minefield in a certain direction, that I'm aware of. It follows a square grid pattern. Other people are nearby but I forget who.

      Fragment:

      A bit like our home here. Some kind of mechanism and wooden surfaces that move on a single axis. They have metal sockets and plugs that allow them to interconnect vertically. Then outside, at the back. I hold a thin piece of 2x2 Lego plate towards H, who's in our yard just over the wall. There's some kind of visible electromagnetic flow between the Lego piece and something H is holding. Now the Lego displays an amperage reading on its top face, and I show H while also making some comment about it.

      Then I remain on the bit outside of our back yard. This area is different from how it should be, it feels more open and more natural. I forget what I'm doing but I know that H is putting up an old silver-coloured plastic TV at the back, it has something to do with conclusions we drew on before because of the EM flow. Some neighbour from the house right next to ours (but not actually), the one on the left if I'm looking from the back, he talks to us and says something about a party game and wishing there were players, or something? We invite them to play, I think. Then I'm like in some kind of Sims game (the party game) but the scale of the property grid is reduced and simplified.

      I wake up around this point, after I've built some simple house walls in the game.



      25th August 2021


      Initial recall was good but I didn't bother with making initial notes.

      Scraps:


      Something about a school or university, and learning.
    9. Hanging out

      by , 08-12-2021 at 11:04 PM (DJ of lucid goals and how it goes)
      I'm flying over town half lucid. I see Elina and wonder why it's always my family I meet in my dreams. This thought triggers it so that a friend of Elina appears next to her and I interact with her instead. She is blonde and tall with a face of someone who takes a lot of energy. We walk down to my house and go to the guest room downstairs. We cuddle and an enchanting atmosphere is there. She is not very interested in me but I am happy. An old evil man enters and I escape by flying through the window. I ask her if we can meet up somewhere else and she agrees. I fly to a building and meet up with her later on in a different house. I don't want to break the window and walk in through the door instead.
      Tags: cousins, flying, home, love
      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid
    10. ccciv.

      by , 07-21-2021 at 10:36 AM
      17th July 2021

      Fragment:

      I'm in an office building of some kind, maybe a hospital. It's well lit but there are no windows and it's mostly corridors. I'm with someone I think and we get to this bit that's like a waiting area, with chairs. There are some people sat on the chairs. The walls are a neutral colour, maybe cream? There are two doors on the same wall, some distance apart and with some of the chairs in-between.

      I think we wait around for a bit but then the person I'm with is supposed to go in, so they do. I think there's a doctor but I get a feel of radio presenter too somehow.

      (recall gap)

      I have to leave and reach some elevators. I call a lift to go up. In the dream I don't find this odd but in the dream there was the feeling that I was somewhere high up already. The doors for the lift on the left open. The lift is there but sort of stuck at a lower level. I assume there's some kind of sensor malfunction and feel myself sort of sighing, slightly annoyed. I call it again with the button on the wall and it moves to the correct position.

      The lift is one of those more commercial ones, like ones I've seen in malls. I think I enter the lift and there's a transition. Then, I'm outside somewhere supposedly nearby the building I was in. I'm in contact with the person I was with before, not sure how. I then need to enter some sort of or small octagonal building or tent but it's guarded. Something about a remote controlled hand that would help me.

      (rest of recall had faded)



      19th July 2021

      Fragment:

      I'm on the bed with H. We're opposite each other and our positions are width ways relative to the bed. The bedroom light is on but I don't think it's night time. We're playing sexually and I feel myself go prematurely for some reason, possibly overstimulation. It seems I made a mess on the bed, at spots that don't make sense for the angles involved, but I don't realise this during the dream.

      Then I suddenly become aware of a black cat being to my right, around the middle of the bed. The cat looks relaxed and resting having only momentarily appeared surprised. It looks like the small female cat that we sometimes see in our street. (which I had seen the previous evening)
    11. Roaches, storm and transformations | [18.07.2021, 19.07.2021]

      by , 07-19-2021 at 03:46 PM (Draeger's Dream Journal and Documentation)
      [18.07.2021]

      Roach escape
      I am with my mother, caring for my pet roaches. Suddenly, there is thunder outside and, simultaneously, a roach presses itself through a small opening and my mother despairs as is usual with working with such escapists.

      [19.07.2021]

      Storm
      I am at home, laying in bed. I look outside and see that there is a very dark and massive cloud there. Eventually, though, it moves away and I stand up, hoping to take a picture of a potential anvil. Then, I am back in bed and another storm comes around. This time, it does come to lightning here. My mother, who is scared of thunderstorms, says "Oh no.." as lightning impacts somewhere nearby, and the way the thunder sounds makes it sound like that there will be a second thunder that is much louder, but it doesn't come to that, so I comment that it probably wasn't a positive lightning strike.

      Transformations
      I am at home, somewhere past about 9 pm, using my laptop in the living room, where my mother is sitting as well, using her tablet. Then, I look to the left and see a bat on the wall. First, I comment on how none of us saw that then I put my laptop aside and run away in fear of the bat attacking me, and my mother tells me that they might bite or something like that. I come near the other end of the flat when I somehow grab the bat. For a few seconds, I am standing in a sort of large mansion with a pretty blue color palette used to paint the inside with the bat in my hand. Then I am back home, trying to handle the bat without it biting me. I think about killing it or something like that as I rotate it in my hands. A bit later, for some reason, I am the bat for a few seconds, and then there's a scene change.

      Apparently, I invited a friend over, who can make transformations or something. First, we are standing at night at the roach terrarium in the middle of the house and I transform into something there, but I don't remember what exactly happened. Then, after a small scene change where it is now somewhere mid- or late afternoon, we go into a room where we can probably be alone. There, the friend constructs the transformations from animal samples somehow, and I am eager to try it out. First, he wants to make one with snails (Gastropoda), and I am one for a second. Then, there's a scene change again and I am back to normal. My mother wants something from me and I tell the friend to hide what he's doing, and then I go outside to distract my mother. Then, my father comes and wants something from the room so he just goes in, and luckily, the friend had hidden everything except the animals he was taking samples from, so my father asked what he was doing. As I woke up, I felt some disappointment, since it was pretty interesting.



      1: This was just because I stumbled across the term on Wikipedia yesterday.
    12. 9 Jul: Lots of nonsense and prisoner in a house with an astronaut for whom I fall in love

      by , 07-09-2021 at 05:00 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      At my home, my dad is staying at the house too. I want to dress or undress, so I go to the 2nd floor/attic looking for privacy. But then I feel a presence in the darkness and go to the end of the floor to find that my dad is actually sleeping in the bedroom at the end and just woke up. He is surprised to see me, I say I didn't know he was there. Then things turn to a deeply uncomfortable vibe as he gets too close to me and I can feel his boner. I get down the stairs fast but he also comes down. He turns the tv on and there's Ronaldo and other football players gossiping about something, and Ronaldo takes a stand on some issue that no one else seems to care, showing character and. I then turn around and my father is gone and instead there is Riverstone. He is also watching tv on the couch and switches to some remake of an old 60s series. I find it really stupid. It is some kind of super heroes show, but one of them is a clown that comes from the sea and meets the others on the beach bringing an ominous message. Then they embark on a boat, but I think some fall overboard. I think I hear something behind the curtain on the window behind the tv, so I move the curtain and see the window covered in all sorts of insects, large and small. We are grossed out, we get up and shake insects that started crawling over us. There is even a snake on the floor and we run in horror and wonder how these insects entered the house.
      Then I go meet my mom by the riverside and I see a dog supposedly fighting a racoon or something at a pier, but soon realize it is a staged fight and the animals are rather playing with each other and someone's editing the sound to make it look like a fight. When mom arrives, she is driving an SUV or jeep and she asks me to get in quick. In the hurry I bump with the door on a car next to this and then our door breaks and falls on the ground. She says "never mind, just take it inside the car and we leave". So we leave, but soon after I shout to her that we need to stop as stuff from the back sit are rolling through under my seat and falling to the outside, like her purse and other items. She halts and helps me pick them up and some dude looking like a drug addict takes the chance to approach the car and sneak inside to steal something. But I block him and force him to put it back. He kinda resists but not an actual fight, so he caves in and puts things back. Then he asks for some money and agree to give him some change. But then all my coins and mom's are either silver and gold or special edition collectible coins and I don't want to give him those. He looks increasingly interested in the coins and makes some snarky comment that we are rich and can give him one of those, but I tell him we are also poor despite what it looks like and we can't afford to give him any of those coins but will keep looking for usable money in our purses. Then Alicja comes by and starts conversation with us. She's heading to a seamstress workshop and I go along. Bring a bunch of my unfinished projects for her to finish I guess. Then walks in some famous dude, kinda reminds me of Tony Stark but a bigger playboy. He brings along his girl to have a dress made for her, but she comes in half naked, with the fabric for the dress just covering her front, her butt exposed. She seats quickly on a chair to my side, to hide her back and gets some sympathy from some other lady also seated. Then what seems like a perfect copy of her comes in, fully dressed and also sits by her side. They take some time to realize, but when they do they are shocked to realize they are versions of the same person. And the first one seems to have no clue of what's happening, but the second one goes straight to the guy, and yells at him for allowing a time paradox to happen with his crazy experiments.

      Inspired by a movie I watched during the day, I dream I am sharing a surveilled house in Russia with this gorgeous dude who is an astronaut, his supposed lover which is a bitch and some other dude. Me and the astronaut have been talking a lot and we are clearly in love and going crazy with desire. I am willing to risk everything for a frugal moment of passion with him, but it is close to impossible. There is a meeting in the house, a round table with them 3 and a bunch of other people from outside and I am just standing in the back listening. At some break he comes to me with a book on space stuff, and we get really close and flirt a little bit discreetly. Feels so nice. But his woman sees and attacks me for being so interested in the damn book. Then some genius autistic fat kid joins the meeting and someone pranks him by pulling a chair when he is about to sit. I try to warn him and hold him, but he falls. He still thanks me for being kind. After they are all gone, someone brings us some food for the fridge, the astronaut's woman is gone for a while and I signal him to meet me at the most back room of the house. I get there and it is a dark dirty unwelcoming room. I see images of when the family living there raised a pig on this room. I feel for the pig and see him being taken to die in my mind's eye. There is a stiff bed and I lay there while waiting. I fall asleep and I am out of body watching myself as vampire bats come from god knows where and feast on blood from my leg. I lose hope that he will come, but he does. Unfortunately so do other people and ruin our chance together. Some dude comes talk to him saying he has news about the UFO report. That the government reduced all the supposed unsolved cases to just ten and most were scooters(?) and drones. We realize it is a complete sham to cover up the story and reduce its significance. Anyway, they then announce he his going to get reinstated and receive all the honors and we'll all be free. We get separated and I don't know anything about him for some time. Then it is announced a big event that I watch, maybe on tv, where they all come riding on horses, with strange theatrical fantasy costumes. I see his woman in a sort of wedding dress, so I presume they are also getting married, but then she marries some much older dude and only after much effort I see my astronaut in the back. He is all groomed and fabulously gorgeous. I also see some figure dressed almost like death, all black, very gothic, whispering something to his ear and he abruptly leaves the event. I know he is coming for me so I rush outside to a park. I see in my mind's eye he is also running up a hill to a park, can't tell if it's the same. But I wait and look around. Instead I am approached by a big black dog sniffing me, I pet him, then his owner comes by in a bike and calls him. He runs towards him and knocks down a man in another kind of 3 wheeled bike. I offer help but he manages to get up alone, then looks concerned with 3 guys approaching. They look unfriendly and the others go away, leaving me alone with them. They surround me but do no harm, just laugh and tease me a bit and disappear. Then 3 spectral black ghosts also pass by, turn around and go back. I am getting a bit scared, not knowing what all these mean but have the feeling I am not going to meet my love. Then lots of people come to the park to run, walk their dog or play with their kids and they don't seem disturbed by the ghosts at all.

      Updated 07-09-2021 at 05:06 PM by 34880

      Categories
      non-lucid
    13. Football. Airship mission. Pussle. Flying.

      by , 06-08-2021 at 10:08 AM (DJ of lucid goals and how it goes)
      I'm playing football with Gabriel and Albin and some other people that all are immigrants outside. It reminds me of my old school. Gabriel is on the opposite team and touches the ball with his hand which makes it so that we get a free kick. A person from our team quickly shoots the ball but misses. After some time another person touches the ball with his hand which makes it so that we get another free kick. I am able to kick it but decides to give it away since I feel that it is going to go bad. After some time a person from my team makes an impossible shot. He shoots with the outside of his foot and get a really good spin that makes it so that the ball turns right mid air and goes in the right lower part of the goal. Some kind of magic is present that lets me do something evil against a person but I don't remember what it was.

      Notes: Yesterday I thought about how I wanted to play some sports but that I have to wait until I meet some friends I can play with.

      I'm on an airship around a round table with some other older people. They discuss a plan that I am a part of. I'm outside the airship and looking out.

      I'm riding a cart on a rail in a dark tunnle with some other people in my age. We arrive in a dark old room that is made of old wood. There are now about 4 other people in my age and my chemistry teacher. There are some levers that I test out. When I turn one on a rail system is changed above us. There are several railtracks that we can use but only one is the right path.

      I'm flying with a woman in the sky. The clouds are pink and I try to enjoy but a constant worry is hanging over me.

      Notes: My mood has been fluctuating a lot recently.

      I'm talking with mom in the guest room.

      Updated 06-08-2021 at 10:15 AM by 97565

      Categories
      non-lucid
    14. Driving without a licens. Naked.

      by , 06-04-2021 at 07:44 AM (DJ of lucid goals and how it goes)
      I'm in town with Max. Our car is by the street and I want to show Max how I drive. There is a weird keyhole in the middle of the car that I try to use but it is blocked by some kind of black stick. I go to the front instead and turn it on the usual way. I drive away and do some backing. Max seems impressed. A 25 year old girl takes the formula car behind mine and starts to drive down the street. That makes it easier for me to park later.

      I'm in the guest room downstairs naked. I have a pair of boxers that I hold in my right hand to cover myself as my friend walks in. He doesn't seem to be bothered that I'm naked but I feel uncomfortable and ask him to go out. He doesn't want to and I pull his arm behind his back so that he is bent a lot and he hurts. He says okay and leave me. I walk behind the door and dress myself. There is a book on the bed that I start to read. There are a lot of old pictures that I look on. They are so old that it looks as though they have used a sepia filter. There is a picture of a big ball, I thought. A closer inspection shows that it is a fat man's stomach. The next picture is of a doctor examining a woman and a man next to each other in profile.
    15. 31 May: Jeffrey Dahmer as a guest and walking my dog

      by , 05-31-2021 at 04:46 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      At my paternal grandparents house, staying with my mom and two guests, one is a fat kid on a diet but who can't resist eating and the other is Jeffrey Dahmer supposedly rehabilitated. I am preparing to go to sleep, and I go around the house checking if all is locked down. Wanna tell mom to lock her room and want to tell her who Jeff his but I am afraid she will panic.

      Walking on the street with Hachi on my side, no leash. Then I spot a dude on a street above us with a german shepperd and I grab Hachi by his neck and look around for something I can use as a leash, because he ain't happy with the other dog's presence.
      Categories
      non-lucid
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