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LD #273 last night, 3 weeks since last LD. That's a lot better than the 2 months since the prior one!

I've begun in earnest the Four Foundational Practices as taught in the new 2022 edition of The Tibetan Yogas of Dream and Sleep. Frequently all throughout the day I "wake myself from the dream of distraction," increase clarity and presence, and (1) recognize the dream-like nature of all experience, and (2) reaction to experience, trying as best I can to make this recognition right when the experience/reaction arises. Before bed I (3) review the day, giving another chance to realize the dream-like nature of experience, for those that I may have missed during the day, and set strong intent for recalling dreams and having lucid dreams. (4) in the morning I review the dreams of the night, and if not lucid, recognize that I did dream, but did not recognize the dream as dream while within it, and set intent to notice (get lucid) in future dreams, and set strong intent to continue the practice throughout the day.

I'm also dabbling a bit in the beginnings of the night practices, placing awareness in the throat chakra of the central channel, promoting strong peacefulness.

earliest:
+ I'm putting on a pair of keds, white with a red swoop stripe, lower, flat sole, and the socks are very very low, just to the level of the top of the shoe, I'm wondering if these are good for running even though they are flat soled

mid:
+ gym loading a bar with two red 5kg weights

+ big long dream multiple scenes and FORGOT. Delved and Delved and Delved but just couldn't get it back. Sucks because I spent a lot of time reviewing it during the waking in order to burn it into memory. Lesson: RECORD KEYWORDS DURING WAKINGS!

later:

+ TV park playing ball game over fence far low corner, throws back squash ball but too big heavy for squash, turns into a large (baseball sized) blueberry, I take a bite and see the purple/green color inside, then talking with two other groups about competing access to cook Thanksgiving turkeys there in the cooker on that level, only one can cook at a time, walk to mid level and join a group at a table, this is the table where the pelple have come to avoid those from the other group, in front of a young woman I see my pack of SF Cable car playing cards, I gather them up and take them back to the lower level. Back on the mid-level a group of kids are playing a prank on their friend: they're soaking his mask in Visine. I wonder if this will hurt the eyes of the pranked guy when he puts this on.

+ outdoors, (in vicinity of CH?) narrow roads packed with parked cars, some large/long trucks have driven there and are trying to back up out of there. It's hard because the streets are so narrow. I'm standing then at an intersection with the street running from my right and turning the corner to the right in front of me, about a 110 - degree turn. The truck is backing up pretty quickly, there's a git in a pickup truck sitting right at the corner, as the large truck backs up around the corner, I hear a small sound of impact. After the truck passes I move to stand in the intersection looking at the pickup truck and I see that it has lost its front passenger side external side view mirror, the truck must have clipped it when it passed. The driver of the pickup is there hovering around his truck (don't really see him)?

(I see on the left side of the intersection my dog F and wife L? Tell them to look out for the truck?)

(Walk down the street and turn to the left?), then I'm indoors with son S1, we're walking through musem-like displays, it's low lighting, there are large paintings/posters of attractive women (in punk rock outfits?), (then this transitions to...), I'm remembering a show in New Orleans?

+ LD flying over ocean coast, taco shack
I'm standing in a (musem?) room looking at a (painting/window?) over an outdoor scene and I decide to fly through the window/wall into the scene and it works, I'm flying, and I repeat with exhilaration "I'm DREAMING! I'M DREAMING!", so happy to be lucid again. I'm fairly high (50 -100 feet) above the ground flying along an uneven colorful coastline that bends to the right (water on the left), at first the scene is clear but cartoony, then it sort of restarts and I see the water and it is bright, sunlit, green, and totally crisply vivid and waking realistic. I'm ecstatic at the beautiful view and so happy to be flying again in a dream. I look ahead over the land and notice a small building/shack, I decide this is a taco restaurant and I fly towards it and land in front of it. I try to enter but the entrance has shrunk in size and is like turning the pages of a book like curtains, I keep turning them but can't get a clear entrance. I announce "OK, then, just give me tacos!" and instantly I see a plate of two large hard-shell tacos in front of me, with a good portion of a brown taco meat mixture. I take them to a neighboring round table and sit at about 5 o'clock near the wall of the taco shack, and begin to eat. They are crunch and delicious. The waitress comes by and says "it's lucky for you that you knew to ask for the 2-taco cola special," and I'm sort of amazed because I didn't know about any such thing. Some more plates of tacos appear but they are sort of abstract looking. I see that some people, a young woman, and maybe another young woman, have joined me across the table, sitting at about 12-o'clock and 9-o' clock. I think this must mean that it's a public table open to anybody. As I eat the tacos and feel the crunchiness in my mouth, the scene fades...

...and I reappear at the table, but non-lucid. The table is now fully packed with young college students all around, and we're chatting about where's the best tacos, this place being a good one. (I think I'm in Austin?)

pretty good sleep: fitbit 7:16 sleep, 87 score: time 42/50, deep/rem 24/25 (2:01 REM, 2:00 deep) , restoration 21/25 (76% below resting, 7% restless)

00:17 - 08:24, time awake 51 mins

awake at 08:00 (look at watch), probably awake since 07:30

tons of sugary stuff in the evening (cheese cake, ice cream), late dinner (22:00)

Just one, late dream recalled (there were earlier ones, but they faded)

+ parallel parking a car on a city street, it takes me many attempts to position the car at just the right location, son S1 is outside and is going to hand in a large (old-style) desktop PC to me through the front passenger's window. I'm concerned that passers-by may see? [DS!] One guy tries to grab two precious boxes (son S2's coin collection box and something else), he's trying to pull them from the hands of (my mother?) who's sitting in the back seat right side, I'm then in the back seat leaning out the window pulling our stuff back in, then trying to fight him off, my whole torso is leaning out the window, and I'm trying to pick up rocks and throw at him with enough force to hurt him, but my throws are all ineffectual. I also yelled to son S1 to help (?). Eventually I kill him? I take his (head?) around the front of the car into the street and grind his skull (which looks like a lizard skull? Watched Jurassic Park 2 before bed) into the ground, saying something about "the joker".

+ [vague] something about people, faucets?

earlier:

+ walking around (passing on right) a large-ish house, look inside through windows, see a young-ish woman there (standing at the window looking out at me), I know she's the caretaker of the house, and I know that she is very well suited for this

Middle:
+ rear ender: I stop at a city intersection stoplight (my brakes don't work very well? [DS]). I see a large truck coming up too quickly in my rear-view window, I think he won't stop in time, I pull out into the intersection and a bit to the left trying to avoid it, the truck does hit me but it's a fairly light tap. I continue around to the left, then another left, and I'm talking to a cop there who says I ran the light. I say "how do you know?" He says that because he hear the sound of a car at the right time and then knew that it had happened. I admitted it them, and swore, "f^&*", "oh, pardon my french, but that's the 2nd time I was hit at that intersection [false memory], it has terrible markings, it's not clear at all what to do," then the cop goes off to try to verify this. I move over to a railing and look down to an area one floor down, where there are a number of different intersection models built: markings on the pavement, and some have high piles of (rubber?) blocks. In one of them a man is tasked to shuffle quickly along a portion of the pavement. The cop concludes that I am right, that the intersection is very poorly marked, and (I'm let go without any citation?)

+ I arrive to a city. I'm looking at street signs. Later I'm walking through a neighborhood, there's some festival gathering(?), people sitting around a table? [most of the rest of the dream scenes are in this environment]. (fairly decent amount of content here, mostly forgotten)

+ [f] I'm leaving the celebration, walking past an office with some celebrants still in it, they're drinking red wine (?)

+ [f] me and some friends arrive to the LHS high back patio, where there is a party/celebration planned. We do not have invites, and we furtively peek around the corner, not sure if we should continue fully on to the patio or not. (My dad invites us just to go on in?)

+ [f] a group of worshippers (and the priest?) is exiting from a Greek Orthodox Church across the street after a liturgy. They are all singing "Hail, Mary" in Greek. I/we (the people with me) start singing it in English and it's sort of a singing contest/competition.

+ [f] I see a row of trash cans (small, office-sized) lined up along a wall (about 4-5 of them), the last one contains my [false] blue leather coat all bunched up and stuffed into the can

later:
+ [f] looking at and thinking about a wooden deck. I'm thinking about whether or not it's fire proof (someone says something?)

+ [f] I'm talking to a doctor, asking about what's up with my right pinky, why it gets "stuck" sometimes [true], the doctor answers that it's a "finger curling syndrome" and I get the impression that it's fairly rare and only old people generally have it

Very shallow-sleep type dreaming. Need to do a reset and maybe work on my supplements stack.

* The night before last I dreamt I was at school [one of my biggest DREAM SIGNS but still didn't get lucid]. I had a toy gun. It had an unusual extra cylinder underneath the barrel. This made me question whether it was the accurate replica it was supposed to be but a colleague just told me I was wrong and I accepted it [need to keep questioning more]. I tried to hide the toy in a bag, then things got really weird because I decided I needed to move over all the furniture in the room to make more space, to the point where it would start passing over the edge of the room into the next one!

* Last night was quite an odd dream scene as well. I was in some kind of bar area or lounge with quite a lot of people around. I think I was sitting at a table. A young woman was asking me to list hairstyles that I disliked. I really have no idea what was going on but I sensed that the people around me did. Perhaps it was some kind of wind-up.

deleted

2022-11-15
[night of] 2022-11-15

no recall in the earlier parts of the night, first two pee wakings nothing at all,
after that, some hint of some scenes, but forgotten

basic Huberman stack (1 magnesium instead of 3), no gaba/glycine, no tryp, yes ashwagandha, 66mg B6 (two caps), 21:30
BT 2256
OOB 0820
fitbit: 8:17 sleep, 1:10 awake, REM 1:23, deep 1:13, 86% below resting, 6% restless

earlier
+ some scenes, forgotten: cigars?

+ baseball [DS]: [twilight, DS] throw the runner out at first (but I'm throwing a sponge?) and I don't think I hit him in time. There's a little girl at bat and I yell out "look for bunts!" I'm imagining how I'm swinging the bat and really knocking the ball way out, like in grad school team, blasting line drives between 1st and 2nd, imagine running the bases, checking the fielding, and trying for 3rd, but what if there's a runner also on 3rd? He'd have to make room for me

later:
+ [long, fairly vivid sequence] outdoors, observing the dirt road at my [place in country], there's a truck driving by and I think it's watering the road, I suppose this is to prevent dust from rising, I follow it as it moves forwards and I'm watching it for signs of water spraying but don't really see much. It turns into an elephant(?) which moves down the road, and I don't want it to see me [DS], so I move to a side path and hang from the branches of a tree while it passes. I observe the road that goes by my house and it looks like they've widened the turf, cutting it back to make the road wider. I move on to my property and I'm looking at and examining the neighbor house. It looks familiar [false memory, nothing like my neighbor's house in waking], it's large, tall, reddish/pink in color, multi-story, I see the front door. I see something down in a low court yard area and I go to (pick it up?), and I notice that in a tall narrow stairway in the neighbor's house, with glass walls [DS!!!!] that you can see through, the neighbor (man and woman?) are standing together at the top floor of the stairway, (looking down at me?), I don't want to be seen [DS]. Up on the middle level, the neighbors come out of their house, there are a number of older women, one or two I recognize [false] as long-time neighbors. There is a guest, a venerable old noble woman, who comes out and sits down on a couch with difficulty, I kiss her hand in greeting, I greet them in [foreign language].

Moving back to the front courtyard, I see a boy and a girl playing in a small guard house. Then I'm on a bus with a man (neighbor)?, the bus is medium sized and full of people, the man is sitting in the row ahead of me, half turned facing me with his arm draped over the chair back in front of me, his arm and armpit are open and I think may be stinky (but don't smell anything), he's going somewhere, a museum (?), the bus makes a stop but he doesn't get off in time and I think he's missed his stop, and wonder what he'll do. I don't want to get off, I'm planning to ride the full route in a cycle to get back home again.

There's a young woman in front and to the left of me, I catch a glance at her bust, which is very attractive, I try to look for her again but don't see her.

Outdoors (back home or near home?) I'm staring to climb up on top of a fence or a railing / raised narrow path, and a young woman is there and talks to me and says that we'll be together, I don't particularly want to be with her so I turn around and head back, I slide down over the top of a container (like a garbage bin) that is open in the middle and I'm careful not to fall into the hole and there might be sharp edges. I noticed that on top of a neighboring bin, there is (garbage, food?) and some insects, including a fairly large spider with way too many lets, like 16-24 or more, evenly spaced out all around it's perimeter. No body to speak of, just a bunch of long, spider-bent legs. I think the director (of a film?) can do whatever he wants with his scenes, and that explains the spider.

One jamie dream that was like 1.5 seconds long... We both pulled into a parking lot of mcdonald's of where we both were working??? Oh hellll no.

matrix mall

I was in some game room and everyone was trying this virtual reality game. After spending some time in this ultra realistic virtual reality game I wanted to leave. I asked the npcs in the booth how to leave this place and they looked at me like "WTF" like it was real life. I asked "How do I leave here?" and they pointed to a door. Through the door I was in a mall. I kept telling people that we were all trapped in a virtual reality game and everyone was giving me dirty looks. I tried to prove it by flying around.

FA, I was in someone's yard and said I was glad to be back IRL again. I was somehow still able to fly. Later I was hiking in some caves with some kids and started flying again...

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

People snapped and turned cannibals. I am barricated with Zilla and some other folks at a school, but we gotta move somewhere else. We know of some secure underground complex which has as entrance at the city park.
Strangely, downtown life seems to still be going very much as normal and we assume the madness hasn't spread here yet, but will. We even pass by some kids from another school playing football at their yard, oblivious. But we don't say a word to anyone. We reach the underground bunkers and there are plenty food reserves down there. We know that when the crisis is all over the place, eventually the government will come and use these bunkers, but we hope that if we're already there, they'll allow us to stay or else we'll fight to stay. The bunker spreads out into weird caves all over seven floors. On one floor there is a giant ballroom with black and white chess floor.

This morning after being woken up and going back to sleep I dreamt I was driving a silver Japanese looking saloon/sedan car, and I stopped outside a doctor's to drop off my girlfriend. It didn't look like a doctor's as it was a huge boxy building a bit like a large warehouse or sports centre. While I was waiting for her to come back from the appointment someone was telling vehicle owners to drive round the back of the building. Then I got told to move my car too and I didn't want to, so I asked if I couldn't wait there and he said no not if I wasn't booked in [for that time]. I started to quickly drive the car away along a road extending at 90 degrees away from the wall of the building. I was hurrying but I was unfamiliar with this car's controls. At this point I noticed that it was dark [I can't honestly remember it being dark when I was first outside the doctor's but I am unsure] and hadn't turned on my headlights but didn't know where the switch was on this car. I guessed that it was a small sliding switch on the left stalk and this could've been a DREAM SIGN because the dream seemed to sort of falter for an instant and update itself with the switch apparently being just as I imagined yet the sense of uncertainty still remained so I still felt a little uncertain -- or maybe the part of my subconscious constructing the dream felt uncertain -- whether the headlights had really come on or not.

As I approached a T-junction the car kept slowly rolling forward even though I was trying to hold the brake.

I don't remember many other dream scenes. I think there was something about a camper van.

Two dudes watch a sitcom, there's a scene of a kid bribing his teachers to graduate early which he successfully does. The dudes visit the set as the teacher hands a bag of cookies the child baked, then handed another bag saying "don't eat those, he likes being creative" *canned laughter*

The dudes consider giving the cookies to the YouTubers analysing sitcoms in full length video.

As they eat the normal and "creative" cake, they realise they's no fourth wall as they are stuck in a sitcom themselves, what happens next is a series of crazy events in the style of 2000s Wayans/Scary movie/stoner films as the dudes travel through Berlin using taxis and eventually it pans to the sky as they're on a flying train.

They then end up at an hotel talking to a woman who rejects them, I see this happen and walk through the hotel lobby, going back realising I had left my phone behind which I couldn't find anymore.

A rural town W.Va

expand on the feeling of a dream

I was a drifter - the mind frame of a drifter
expansion of meta-view of (TOM)
expansion of inner personal dialogue

I have been in a bit of a dry spell lately. I took a bit of a break for a couple of days, hoping that I can start with fresh energy (probably tomorrow). Last night I was close to lucidity. I did a nose pinch RC and could still breathe. Didn't really trust it, so I tried pushing my finger through my hand. It didn't go all the way through, but it looked like it was trying to. Also, a scab appeared on the back of my hand as though I were slightly wounded. But I was getting ready to do something, and decided I didn't have time for reality checks and so I stopped.

At one point, I was falling asleep with the mantra "this is a dream". But at some point it changed, and I found myself repeating something like "this is not a dream, is it?" over and over.

Dream Twelve (10.16.2022)

I was riding SheiKra but it was going incredibly slow to "test" the coaster. (What an annoying dream for someone like me who goes to the amusement parks as much as she can!)

Dream Thirteen (10.17.2022)

My fiancé, mom, brother, and I all went to this vacation spot that was a vast indoor beach labyrinth. There were Roman columns and poolrooms. (I have an interest in vaporwave, liminal spaces, and the Backrooms. I believe that's where this aesthetic keeps coming from! I had dreams featuring this aesthetic before those internet genres were a thing but related heavily when I discovered them.) When you first entered the labyrinth, the columns directly ahead appeared to go into an ocean on the horizon. Everything had a hazy blue tint. Then my mom got mad at me for no reason. I left the labyrinth in retaliation. Outside was a random grey city. I somehow learned telepathically from someone my mom apparently got lost inside. I woke up.

Listened to a new sleep-meditation last night. 7hz-2.5hz BW entrainment combined with an audible track and subliminal messages to be aware of dreaming. Early in the night I became partially lucid, but the dream is vague now. Later in the night I had two very confrontive, very combative dreams, where I may have been partially lucid.

I have some memories of a large, glowing white figure, possibly female.

Supplements were Melatonin and 100mg 5 HTP.

Felt very good this morning.