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In the slow long grass
16/06/20
Lucid# 3 - DILD

I’m making my way hastily from a large building with papers screwed up in my hands. I haven’t had time to fold them or put them in my bag. There’s no time, I feel like I have to be quick and get the papers home before I am stopped. I feel as if at any moment some secret, shady organisation is going track me down and stop me as if this is all a big conspiracy. I now start running down a wide flight of concrete stairs and weave in and out of crowds. I quicken my pace and hope it doesn’t draw too much attention. It’s then when I reach the bottom I arrive in a large courtyard almost like the front of my old high school but full of long flowing grass which blows around and looks like grassy waves. everything has become dreamlike and it is now in slow motion with a slight de saturated and grey tinge to everything. I know I’m in a dream but I don’t quite comprehend what that means. I run into the grass but I’m only able to move in slow, jerky movements as if I’m wading through water and every step is twice as hard as if a force is constantly pushing on me. “Feel the grass” I tell myself and do so. It feels so real as I run it through my fingers. I look around and notice how real everything else feels as well. it feels like waking life. I look up at the sky and I can’t believe all this is actually in my head. Im everything I can see. I am one with it all. I then notice a large arrow in the grass made out of rocks. I wonder if it has been put there for me to follow? It feels almost like it’s a video game and the arrow is a side quest. “Another time” I decide and carry on towards the exit to the courtyard in front. I turn back and look and now the front of the arrow is broken and I wonder if I had misread the sign. I make my way painfully slow to the front gates and the exit. I see a big slope to the left leading down to a river. “listen” I tell myself and listen to the sound of the river.
After I have lost lucidity and I’m in a room laid on a floor, I have the papers. I then feel an odd sensation in my mouth, I feel with my tongue and I’m missing a tooth! I can feel the gap and gum underneath, it feels saw and tender but I think it’s normal.


Analysis:
I’m not sure why I was running away but it felt like I was escaping and people would be looking for me. Then it just transitioned seamlessly into a lucid moment. I remember the slow movements and the effort it took to move forward. I’ve had this sensation before whilst trying to run in dreams as if I’m trying to move but it’s as if I’m half frozen. Then I seemed to be telling myself to do ADA. I felt the grass, listened to the river and looked at how real everything was. The flowing wave like grass came from a real video I saw on Facebook before bed but I barely looked at it for longer then 5 seconds. The arrow was also interesting and I wonder now what would have happened if I had followed it? Maybe the dream wanted to show me something? I didn’t really have much conscious control though and I wish I had done a reality check, it probably would have stabilised the dream more and made me in control. Instead I sort of slipped back into a normal dream at the end.

Waking Notes:

Stability: Medium
Control: Medium
Clarity: Medium
Awareness: Low
Length: Low

Trigger: Spontaneous
RC: NA
Length: 1 minute approx.
Goals: none
Techniques: WBTB
Time: 6 - 6:30am
Lucid count: 3

Last nights dream was super interesting. I was in an older era, at what seemed to be a Victorian finishing school, and we were meeting possible suitors. It was rather interesting, there were about a dozen girls including myself, and we were dressed in lovely silk dresses, silk slippers, and had our hair done in intricate styles. I recall some of the men wore powdered wigs and long waist coats- one in particular was blue and gold with silver buttons. I also recall one had taken particular interest in me, but I did not find him to be as interesting.

We were on the grounds of a lavish Estate, with many trees and flowers. There were no other properties nearby, but there was a lake which connected to a small river which ran up the side of the main house. We were allowed to use the rowboats, but only with a suitor. We were watched over by a small amount of staff, strict older ladies who were very good at keeping an eye on us. I thought it was strange that the men were allowed to stay in the main house, but if there was anything untoward going on I didn't notice.

One major part of the dream was a dance, we were dressed in even finer dresses and stood in a line to see which suitor would choose us. I was picked by the man in the powdered wig and waistcoat. The other girls thought I was lucky but I didn't have any interest in him at all. My dream kind of fast forwards here, as it's now a different night and I'm outside with the rest of the girls. Things seem to have taken a dark turn, as Mr. Powdered Wig is going on a spree of violence. I am hiding in tall grass, and can see 4 or 5 of the girls on a row boat in the river. Since we were never allowed to use one, they were idly floating and didn't know how to use the oars.

One of the girls runs up, she is heavier set with dark hair. I can see her dress is a lighter color made of silk, and she seems very scared. She starts yelling about..something, and trips over a lump in the grass. Mr. Powdered Wig shows up shortly after, armed with a shovel. I watch (as do all the others) as he raises it and brings it down on her body. Naturally, the girls in the boat scream in terror, and I cannot seem to find my voice. I seem to gain some lucidity here, so I stand up out of my hiding place and start walking towards him. I feel no fear, as I can control the dream if I need to. He turns and stares at me, and I embrace him. He doesn't attack me, which I was expecting. Instead he drops the shovel and I wake up.

I tried to go back into the dream, but I felt too rested and was not able to.

I was in an open area that had incredibly rich color. I realized that I was dreaming and recalled that it had been a long time since I was lucid. I was very aware of the dream, and it immediately felt far more stable than my usual lucid dreams. The scenery was also far richer than I am used to. I was in a wide open field with bright bold grass on flat green hills, like a digital place. The single tree next to me had very green leaves and red apples, but nothing had texture to it. Everything was more like a surface mesh made of triangles. I was astounded by it and took note of how lucid I was, how stable it was, and how fantastic the perceptual experience was. I was enjoying perusing around this weird digital mesh world for about two minutes until all of a sudden another character showed up. A building appeared, it was a school, and we walked in together right before the dream ended.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP


I am a college student and I hit and run a man and left him bleeding to death on the road. My thought was that he was going to die anyway, before help arrived and so I rationalized that fleeing wouldn't ruin even more lives, namely mine and of those around me who would suffer immensely if I was convicted of manslaughter. So I decided to run away and pretend I had nothing to do with it and act normally. I was absolutely sure I could pull it off, even when the police appeared on campus and started investigating the students.
I am heading to the library and the detectives are in the corridor talking to people and my paranoid mind believes a couple of them seem to be watching every movement I make and my facial expressions. I do get a bit nervous and I bump into a table and throw an ashtray to the ground, but I am already out of their sight. At the library I steal some chips from some kid who has a bag of chips open on his table. He doesn't even flinch. Wonder if that's because he is my friend or he just fears me. I go meet a friend at the most far back table and he is playing a computer game with cars and he is very proud that he managed to fit a car with a long hood into the back of a truck cabin and make a weird truck trailer, just to prove his smart and ability to bend the rules and codes of the game. I couldn't care less and cars actually trigger me at the moment, but I engage with his enthusiasm, to not raise suspicion. Later on I meet a group of friends, who are all very shocked with the events. One of the girls (looks my old friend Mara) says she would have no mercy for whomever the killer is. I feel very uncomfortable that I am the person and imagining if it is ever found out.
We go for a walk outside the campus and we pass by the road where the accident happened, but they don't know that. There is no longer any sign of what happened, besides a patch of sand the authorities spread to soak up the blood. But my friends don't know, they have no idea where the accident happened, so "Mara" asks what is this for and I swiftly say probably to cover some oil spill. They look at me a bit strangely and I say I am just guessing. We arrive at some snack-bar / pub by the side of the road, where they like to go, and the cops and detectives are gathered there. This makes me anxious. There is also Master Harry, a Scott who is like the keeper of the campus. He spots us and invite us along. But my friends feel super interested in talking to the cops. The owner of this place is a surfer and has a long board decorating the place, above our heads and one of the detectives apparently also surfs so they engage in conversation regarding the long board. I am not interested.
Then the older detective throws me a bate, by teasing me about a plant cared by the bar owner. I am not the least interested. He asks me stuff like if I can identify it, if I'd like to have one too and what I think about this guy managing to have one in this climate. And I am like "why should I care?". Then he shows me it is a pineapple and asks me if I shouldn't I be more enthusiastic about plants. I realize he already knows too much about me and my interests, which means I am a suspect. I do have a greenhouse that I care for meticulously at my parents house and I care a lot about plants, just not in this context with the stress I am feeling. I am seeing my life going down the drain. I don't know how they know, but they already suspect it was me, and are just trying to catch me. I think about my plants dying if I am arrested and I feel extremely sad for that, more than anything else.

Back to previous dream. I am not caught yet, but I am going crazy with the guilt and duplicity. I have to deal with several people related to the victim and the feeling that I am keeping this secret from them and they would hate me if they knew the truth is consuming me. I am wishing to go to some island where nobody knows me and start a new life.
I am staying at some pension of a lady who isn't particularly fond of me. She complains of something I supposedly did in the kitchen and asks me to clean it, but I am relieved to know it is just a silly thing I didn't even do. She has no clue that some other night I was drunk and peed in the kitchen. So I go look into the fridge and instead of cleaning whatever, I steal something, like some cheese and bread to make a sandwich. Then I hear her talking to her daughter, who just arrived from school and is complaining about something. Her mother says "well, you're not doing anything, because her mom is Carolina Herrera and nobody dares to upset that family at this moment, because of the terrible thing that happened to her dad."
They are talking about the man I killed. I feel guilty again and run to my room. The room looks like my mom's office and there are tigers outside of the window trying to come in, so I rush to shut all the openings and lock the door.

At my mom's house, It's night and I look outside. I spot a UFO, just a white light orb dancing around at distance. Then I spot another one, static and the first one moves towards the still one and then they both move away. During the day I spot one again in the sky. I start seeing them a lot. One day I spot one very small just hovering a street. I now am able to spot them all over the streets, spying on people, unaware of them. Only I seem to be able to see them. with the help of some friends, I capture one. It is the size of a basketball and it loses the ability to camouflage when offline. I show to my friends, who believed me but had never seen one themselves. I teach my friends how to spot them, and we can see them in the sky, in strategic places, positioned in geometric clusters. They form ice crystal like shapes with arms connecting them inside pentagonal areas. These bigger structures seem to be regulating the climate or other purposes. The little ones at the street level are watching us on a daily basis.

Back to the dream. Me and my friends are now a rebel force meeting in secret and collecting data on these UFOs, trying to understand what they are here for. One day, I am on a bus ride with one of this friends and we spot one in the sky, after a long time not seeing them. We wondered if they found a new way to cloak or had simply disappeared. Then we see two jets flying on each side of the orb but at some point leaving and the orb staying fixed in a position. Me and friend point to it but no one else seems to see it. As I point to it, I feel like I am pushing a button and the orb opens up into a square of squares of different size, like a virtual keyboard. On top rows are bigger blue squares and bellow are smaller red squares. So I do what I did before and also pretend to click them as if they are buttons. I push a random combination of keys. The UFO/keyboard disappears and immediately strange things happen, like some cars on the road going bananas as if they lost their electronics, and going over the rails and crashing. We rush to meet with the others and tell them what happened. They are a bit incredulous, but I explain maybe all orbs are programmable but we need to crack the code and see which combinations do what. Then the girl who usually brings us food comes in looking scared. Says the building is surrounded and they threatened her. Everyone wonders how they found us and I say I actually told them and it is part of a bigger plan, but they think I am just crazy and are in shock that I did that. I seem to have a really intricate plan, but I wake up before finding out.