memorable

Dream: In restaurant, maybe FL or Outback. I've asked them to let me use their kitchen to prepare a meal for F, they agreed. I'm cooking a Ruth's Chris-sized steak and while I'm busying myself with everything else (sides, table prep) it burns on the bottom. I flip it and quickly go to serve it. But it turns out they gave me a shitty table, and I know how F likes booths. So I try to move but all they can give me is a less shitty table. So I pick up the drinks and food and move them, I have to get the assistance of one of the waitresses to get it all, then F arrives and the waitress is sitting with us now. Suddenly a boy joins us to get with the waitress, and it's a very convoulted version of the dance episode from "My So-Called Life" which F was watching last night. The steak tastes amazing despite being "well and good" or some other variation of the phrase "well done" that one of the DCs said. It was really juicy, nicely but minimally seasoned, tasted like a solid Medium although it looked black on the bottom.

Dream: Dream revisits the same area as the last dream, I take F through to the other side of the building, it's a long hallway that reminds me for some reason of the first level map from SW: Dark Forces, while in reality it's just a long, wide white hallway with very tall ceilings and a cul-de-sac-ish area at the end.

Spoiler for potentially NSFW:

F and I are talking (sort of fighting?). I'm on top of her on the ground and we're making out and for some reason I slap her? I walk outside of the divider and see Ms. P, my babysitter from when I was a kid. It's this really awkward juxtoposition (I think I may have been naked?) and I'm trying to be nice to her while she's hugging me, and at the same time am feeling really guilty about F, and want to go apologize to her or something, but I'm still mad at her? It was just a huge jumble of emotions.

Fragment: F and I in an upstairs hallway like Laura Palmer's but reversed and open, hiding from someone?

Dream: FA where I wake up and feel neck-fuzzy and walk around the room clumsily.

Actual WBTB happens here.

Dream: I'm a superhero in a library area, my nemesis is Bullet, I have a female partner, at some point I hijack smokey van for a getaway (from a black patriarchal superhero gang/family of Bullet), I have invisibility powers, "NPCs" can't see me but will still avoid me -- thought that was an interesting caveat; an older woman superhero comes in and betrays my partner and is searching for me with the help of Bullet, I fly through paper separators, they won't kill me -- want me alive. Will edit to fill in details later. At some point I could read things consistently -- what did I read??

Dream: Lanes, bus, swerving. Bus is like 20 feet wide and 30 feet high and has to park outside of the overpass. Sunny day.

Lucid #81: Revisit table/desk area from Bullet dream. Spontaneously gain awareness but don't want to "cross the threshold" and become lucid. Linger for a second, playing with drawers, then say fuck it and ask "What is my path in life?" or something like that to my subconscious repeatedly. I don't get or feel a response, so I remember some old advice and look down and examine myself.

Spoiler for decidely NSFW:

I'm wearing a deep blue T-shirt, and for some reason, grey panties. I walk up to a mirror near the desk and check what's going on down there, and it's a pretty accurate depiction of the female anatomy. I'm kind of just checking it out when the realization hits that the dream is screwing with me and I'm about to wake up

Spoiler for decidely NSFW:

and then I do.

Tried Numi brand Guayusa tea last night (at bedtime, not WBTB, because I had no opportunity to steep tea for 8-10 minutes in the middle of the night). I half-expected it to keep me awake but in reality my thoughts were just so clear for the first time in a long time that I didn't want to go to sleep for around 30 minutes. Still had no problem relaxing with it overall, it just felt like a fog had been lifted from my brain. Highly recommend.

5x1+ 1x.5 + 10 (first lucid) + 5 (DILD) + 2 (WBTB) = +22.5 => 165

12-16

Nothing pre-WBTB
Dream: FA where red foxes come into the backyard, dog is scared, then more foxes come over hill covering fence.
Dream: FA where I'm rehearsing a lucid in bed - visualization skills were amazing because I was in a dream (I think).
Lucid #78: In 9 backyard, become lucid, run out towards birdhouse with dog, turn him into a fox from earlier dream, fly.
Lucid #79: In attic, become lucid, do weird finger-through-wood-through-finger RC, walk around, beginning of plot of #80 (grey hair black eyeliner pale woman is introduced as a revolutionary/collaborator?)
Lucid #80: In a modern-looking guggenheimish place, kept myself stable for a long time (maybe 5 mins total dream length?). Got lucid almost immediately but went with plot of lucid. I'm a woman in this one, running away and spying on behalf of the woman from before. I remember feeling my feet when I was running. I run through an atrium/lobby area while it's still empty and find a good place to duck behind (it's an attached area to the circular lobby and staircase that's recessed a few feet into the floor). When I climb/drop down into this small hiding place, I feel the gravity/physical sensations in vivid detail even though it's a movie-style acrobatic move. I duck pretty low (but not low enough) and watch as maybe a hundred people come down the staircase. I start looking at their faces and they're so detailed. They're all adults, most dressed in business clothes or their sunday best. Suddenly there are three or four older women and men wearing long powder blue robes and white hoods/masks, and they look right at me. I jump out of my hiding spot, across the staircase and to the lobby (where all of the people are now. I stand on a table and am soon followed by the pale white-haired black eyeliner girl, who starts monologing about why we're there. After a bit of this (I wish I remembered what she said) I wake up.
It was a long lucid chain so I had other lucids but don't remember enough to write them down or count them. Lucid fragment: transformed myself.
Fragment: Grandpa?
Dream: FA where I write down/tell all of my dreams

3x1 + 1x.5 +
10 (first lucid) + 5 (DILD) + 2 (WBTB) +
5 (RC) + 2x5 (other lucids)
= +35.5 => 138.5

12-17

Dream: Watching an RPG like Chrono Trigger or Oracle of Seasons (those eras) play out in front of me; it's taking place in a large castle with small raised platforms along the walls of an open section. At first there are people (sprites) there, but ss I approach each time they fade quickl. Possibly due to a curse? I think tomyself during the dream that the sprites sould be replaced with a "..."?
Fragment: Trying to find a shirt in the dryer for F's cousin, they're all too small though.
Fragment: Something about a carrot wrapped in plastic (Easter).
Dream: Overhead view of google maps/earth, I'm watching third-person my car drive down a road. I have to direct it with my touch/gestures from above, and it become a little unstable a few times. I am sort of an entity within the third-person camera doing the gestures, if that makes sense. Eventually I just start driving like crazy and crash into cars, hop over them, am kicking up dust. There's one section of the road that curves in two places, I have to zoom in to decide. Then I kick up dust all around and I'm pretty much just figure-8-ing the car around the desert. There's a humongous cardboard box which I run into.

2x1 + 2x.5 = +3 => 141.5

12/15/18: Seeing that I was working on my writing project that has taken me 23 years (yes, 1995 at age nine) to get perfect after getting skills in 2003 and improving on them, the "writing-project-discussion" dreams returned after a seemingly long hiatus.

Saturday's dream was split into three parts, in which the other two didn't make much sense. The first part had me looking for what appeared to be journal pages just like one of the first drafts I tried to write when the main character I had, Number 25, was female. The dream took place in either Raleigh or Cary, North Carolina, leading me to believe it was the latter. Like dreams I had in 1993 in Maryland (age six or seven), late 1995 (age nine) and last year, the skies were overcast and took place either in the afternoon or evening, but there were no computer screens nearby. I did, however, see a girl with dark brown hair and brown eyes, though. I tried to wave at her, but she didn't pay attention.

I have a feeling this was the same girl in dreams I had between 1993 and 2015. Her last appearances before this were on October 8, 2012, March 14, 2013, November 2, 2014 and December 17, 2015. The one on March 14th, 2013 didn't make any sense, as she appeared near what appeared to be a malfunctioning waterfall (again, with overcast skies) with a cardboard sign above her head, in black ink and in sentence case, reading "James Lafferty". I think I got that dream as it may have been something I did online before going to bed that day at age 26 (I'm 32 now). Like the last four dreams before this one, she also had no spoken lines here, either.

The building was a cross between the top floor of one of the two story classrooms at Adams Elementary I remember going to in 1994-95, the final year for me to attend said school (sadly, nowadays, Adams is no longer a traditional school; instead, it has been converted to a year-round school) and the top floor of classrooms at Wake Technical Community College, where I went for class my first and second semesters (2005-07). All I remember was saying, "We don't call them that!", possibly in reference to the missing journal pages, which did something unremarkable like the Chaos Emeralds in the Sonic the Hedgehog series of games, usually found in Special Stages.

12/16/18: This time, I found myself at a house eerily resembling the one my late grandmother used to own in Magnolia, North Carolina in Duplin County before it was sold, that I last visited in 2011 on my 25th birthday.

I see a girl driving a BMW M3 convertible, chassis code E36, colored in a shade of blue trying to cut the grass before apparently speeding off, giving up. I see what appears to be a family of all girls, going inside to see a picture of a couple from Salinas, California after talking to a woman with green eyes and blonde hair, middle-aged, apparently talking to me about her daughters, who apparently were pretty attractive. I had a feeling they came to North Carolina from California, which is exactly what my parents did (returned) when they had me 32 years ago. Another girl tried to cut the grass with a bicycle, but punctured the big tire, which made no sense whatsoever.

I've been receiving writing project suggestion dreams since 2017, and some of them are helping while some just aren't. Either way, I'm going to be busy, as writing young adult fiction is no walk in the park. WM86/DFW signing off.

Date of Dream: WED 12 DEC - 2018



Dream No. 505 - The Uncrossable Road

I don’t remember how the dream started. From where I do remember, I was at Stud Park shopping centre but I forgot what I was doing there. I was walking back towards home with a small group of people that there was a giant obstruction on a big section of the major road. In-fact, it wasn’t even a road at all and was rather a huge area of coastal rock and rapidly moving water amongst it that was impossible to cross. I saw all the other people standing at the foot of the road break, looking worried, not knowing what to do.

I thought that I would summon on 18-Volt and get him to help me cross, not only that but to get my brother NB across as well. My mum came up to me and said she didn’t want me summoning him and he was just an example of spiritual propaganda. I ended up raising my voice at my mum in 18-Volt’s defence and told her straight out, “He is a dream guide!”, and I also mentioned, “And it’s not just me, I’m going to ask him to take NB across as well”.

My mum still didn’t seem convinced but I wasn’t going to put up with any of her negativity and instead, I was going to prove to her that my dream guides are the kind and loving sort. I walked further down the street, away from her, and proceeded to call for 18-Volt. I noticed that my brother was standing close by. It took a few attempts but eventually, 18-Volt was successfully summoned.

He appeared on the start of the coastal rock terrain and he was somewhat distorted, especially with his figure being slightly smaller than me in this dream. Still, the energy radiating off him suggested that this was 18-Volt and so I comfortably approached him. I asked him to take me across but then I added, “I want you to take my brother as well”. He didn’t talk in this dream but he nodded and quietly accepted my request.

The dream then showed me (still 1st person mode) locked in by 18-Volt’s left arm (he also didn’t seem to be distorted now; the arm and side of his body were of WarioWare Gold graphics). I couldn’t see my brother but there was this energy suggesting that he was locked in the same way, in 18-Volt’s right arm. Indeed, 18-Volt was the one to help us cross as he was able to land on each small rocky pedestal jutting out of the water by doing a long moon-jump motion. After he landed on a few of the little pedestals, the scene changed.

My brother and I were now back at home and the scene was showing him in his bedroom. He had some friends over and he was telling them about how he was saved earlier. I came down and said something to him, I forgot what it was, but he said not for me to tell mum. That’s all I can remember about this dream.



Dream 505: Results (Competition #9)
Competition Night: 7
Lucid or Non-Lucid?: Non-Lucid
Dream Guide: 18-Volt
Emergency Team: None
Eligible For Competition Points: Yes



Points For This Entry: 10.0
Calculation Details:
- Full Non-Lucid Dream (1.0)
- Summon A Dream Guide: 18-Volt (1.0)
- Help Someone In Need: My Brother (1.0)
- 7-Day Recall Chain (7.0)

+ Previous Total: 18.5
Total Accumulated Points: 28.5

Date of Dream: SUN 9 DEC - 2018



Dream No. 502 - Separated Sections

Dream 502 A - Easter All Year Round
I don’t remember much about this dream. From what I can remember, my mum and I were at a very distorted of Waverley Gardens shopping centre and we were looking to put together an Easter hamper to give to my two little cousins. We went into the sweet store and some of the Easter eggs I picked up felt like the chocolate had completely melted inside. That’s all I can remember about this dream.

Dream 502 B - Heavy Sleeper
I don’t remember much about this dream. From where I do remember, I was in this unknown building and there seemed to be all these strangers around. I was calling out for 18-Volt and then I asked them, “does anyone know where 18-Volt is?”. A few people pointed in a certain direction and so I went that way. Apparently I went too far that way though as someone who was supposedly a distorted version of Dreamy WB pointed in the opposite direction. I looked absolutely confused for a second but soon, I discovered a door and so went backwards toward the door.

I slowly opened it as not to disturb anyone as it had led into a small office space. There were all these people sitting at desks, with their backs turned to me on entering. I went over to 18-Volt (a slightly distorted WarioWare Gold appearance) and even he had the professional mannerism, brushing me off and telling me to let me finish his work. It wasn’t long though before he had stopped what he was doing and turned his chair around, signalling that he could now talk to me.

Whereas 18-Volt was supposedly just expecting an informal greeting, I jumped up onto him and got myself comfortable on his lap, facing inwards towards him. In no time at all, I leaned my head into him, put my hands around his waist and fell asleep on while still on his lap. My eyes were shut but I had perceived this energy, telling me that he must have suddenly been startled to see that I had just helped myself to a nap without even saying anything to him first, thinking to himself “WTF?”.

After 18-Volt got startled, he eased up and was now trying to stay as still as possible so as not to startle me awake. I got so relaxed that I actually started to lose consciousness. In-fact, the eventual complete loss of consciousness led to the dream ending; I woke up.

Dream 502 C - All Aboard The Train
I don’t remember how the dream started. From where I do remember, my dad was taking me to some unknown doctor’s clinic for a consultation of some sort. When we got there, I find out that we were supposed to take some sort of train to another block of consulting rooms. We didn’t know where the train was though. My dad and I sat down in what was the apparent waiting room. After a little while of nothing, the seats actually started to move off! This was the train!

These belts came out of nowhere and I thought to myself, “That’s weird that the seat-belts just randomly came out like that”. At one point though, I complained to my dad that the seat-belt had tightened itself too hard and so now it was squashing me and almost suffocating me. The dream showed us riding through this cave on a set of high-up railway tracks. The place we ended up at was completely different and I have forgotten what the place actually looked like or what I was doing there.

On the way back, I wasn’t with my dad anymore and rather I was by myself. This time, it appeared to be a real train that I was boarding and all in the same carriage were all the members of the WarioWare crew. They all seemed distorted in some way except for 18-Volt who had a 100% accuracy to his WarioWare Gold appearance. I even saw Wario sitting more towards the back of the train. I was sitting at the very front, on the right side next a window. Across from me was 18-Volt, on the left side, next to a window and behind him was 9-Volt.

With my bags on the seat next to me, I looked to 18-Volt and with some hesitation, I said something like, “If it isn’t too much of a hassle, do you mind sitting next to me?”, then actually moving my bags and putting on the floor in front of me. 18-Volt didn’t speak but he seemed happy and he got up, came over and plonked himself onto the seat next to me. Then he spoke to me a bit but I forgot what he said. After that, 18-Volt placed his right arm around my neck and I placed my left one around him in return.

The dream then showed the train going back though a cave similar to the one I had travelled through with my dad. The differences were that the scenery was slightly different and there were no seat-belts. At one point, the dream made mention that the train was going to go extremely fast. Then the train did go really fast and it was rocking really badly from side to side if it wasn’t going in the straight direction. It was indeed scary but 18-Volt reassured me, saying something like, “I’ve got you”, as he pulled me closer into him and tightened his grip around my neck to keep me upright.

Near the end of the train ride, it was stated by the dream that I would be escorted by 18-Volt down the ramp as I passed by each of the other WarioWare employees. There was no ramp in the first part of the dream, so the area I returned to was not the same area I was in at the start. There was a large concrete ramp that was covered in yellow high-visibility paint. I was now walking down the ramp but I couldn’t see 18-Volt; the energy perception though suggested that he was following right behind me.

Just as the dream mentioned, distorted WarioWare employees were set up equally apart on sections of the ramp. Some of the hands I remember shaking were Dr. Crygor, Ashley, 9-Volt and Penny. I don’t have clear recall of the other characters although I do know that I shook all of their hands at some stage of the ramp walk. When I got to the bottom of the ramp, the dream ended.



Dream 502: Results (Competition #9)

502 A
Competition Night: 4
Lucid or Non-Lucid?: Non-Lucid
Dream Guide: None
Emergency Team: None
Eligible For Competition Points: Yes

502 B
Competition Night: 4
Lucid or Non-Lucid?: Non-Lucid
Dream Guide: Dreamy WB & 18-Volt
Emergency Team: None
Eligible For Competition Points: Yes

502 C
Competition Night: 4
Lucid or Non-Lucid?: Non-Lucid
Dream Guide: 18-Volt
Emergency Team: None
Eligible For Competition Points: Yes



Points For This Entry: 7.5
Calculation Details:
- Non-Lucid Fragment (0.5)
- Full Non-Lucid Dream (1.0)
- Have A Dream Guide Automatically Appear: Dreamy WB (0.5)
- Summon A Dream Guide: 18-Volt (1.0)
- Full Non-Lucid Dream (1.0)
- Have A Dream Guide Automatically Appear: 18-Volt (0.5)
- 3-Day Recall Chain (3.0)

+ Previous Total: 5.0
Total Accumulated Points: 12.5

12-13

Dream: In a forest with F and D. I'm laying treats along the right-side path for D to follow and go through. For some reason, it's a competition where I have to lead D through his path and then do my own path as well. Once I finish D's path with him (he isn't great at it) I go to a small dock/pavillion/gazebo where I guess I have to cross to get to my path. There are all of these fuzzy caterpillars arranged like spiders crawling over the area I have to duck under/back through to get to my path. I'm really grossed out but eventually forced to touch them and find out they're not the stinging kind (maybe F shows me?). I back through and wake up.

Dream: I'm in 9 with F's grandma (G) and little cousin (L), we're planning a party for L and I bought her a paintbrush. G is asking me to host a party or something in this room and I said fine and she said everyone else will have to pay $50 which is a great honor but I don't have to pay it. There's a big crooked cardboard pink box with a weird shape protruding from the top, which I assume is G's present for L sitting out in the open, unwrapped. L keeps asking what the logo for Walmart is, and I don't want to tell her because in the top-right corner of the box it's there, and I guess I don't want her to know her present came from walmart? Doesn't make a lot of sense because the other side says "Shipped from Walmart" in clear black Impact font letters, just upside down (maybe she can't read upside down).
Dream transition to the kitchen area and I notice a roach or two on the mantle. Then I realize they're everywhere. It was dark before but now it's morning. I try to find some shoes to kill them with and when I look down I realize there are roaches and beetles everywhere, on the floor, couch, etc. I ask my dad for his shoes as I back towards the garage door. He says I'll be fine, they can't hurt you. The smaller beetles are approaching me now, one of them the size of an adolescent turtle has a white spot where his shell by his face peeled off. There are now beetles the size of those old exercise platforms that you step on and step off from. They have two pincers and a protruding element. Each time I look away and look back, it looks more metal/mechanical. My dad is putting his foot and ankle in between the pincers and the protruding part and showing me that "they don't hurt you" but really he's just moving his ankle out of the way at the last second.

Dream: In 9 LR again at night, room is mostly empty and I'm working onn the floor with F on some christmas dioramas on construction paper platforms. I can't remember now what the first few were of, but after doing a few she's mad at me. I get up and get some wooden train tracks (the traditional kind that fit together) and a wooden train (which looks pretty beat up). Two of the four tracks are painted, one red, one blue. I offer to paint the other ones and she gets angrier. I close the drapes on the sliding glass door but she wants them open, and she opens them back up, although they part from the middle when she does it whereas in real life they all pull from one side. D is looking out the window. She's still very mad at me when I bring her some red corrugated construction paper for the last diorama.

Fragment: Hospital w/ F?
Fragment: 9 backyard? Serious w/ family?

Had a few near-WILD experiences during this period despite doing no daywork and no MILD, only did SSILD after the WBTB briefly. I did take a vitamin B12 before bed (around 10 but didn't fall asleep till 11). WBTB (where I actually got up and walked around) 5:30 till 6:30, woke for good at 7:35.

Lucid #73: I'm in a huge mall or college bookstore area, yellow light. The dream part went on for a while but at a certain point I round a corner and see F. She's wearing something low-cut and holding a book. I notice some freckles that aren't accurate and become lucid! The first thing I said, for some reason, was "this is our dream!" I don't remember why I did this, but it seemed to empower her as a DC to be happier/less distressed; maybe it was just my own perception of her informing this. In any case, we talk for a while, but because I kept diving in this lucid chain instead of writing these down in between, I don't remember now about what. Eventually I led her outside to a campus student union/cafeteria area. I picked her up in my arms and I told her I was taking her to my incubated dream world (I called it something weird which I wish I remembered now). I spun for maybe 10-20 seconds but it didn't help much except to stabilize a bit. I ended up just looking at her for a while, and she was just smiling so big. Probably the single most wholesomely gratifying LD experience so far.

Lucid #74: I'm in a small cramped room, blue light. I'm with F again, leading her by the hand. We pass through another room with clutter and junk all around and I see a medusa-like woman who's covered in snakes, all green-black. She starts to chase us but I become lucid and send her away from us, not via force push or anything, but just by will. She is moved (not pushed) back against the wall, and I will her to phase through/into the wall (I figured if I can do it, so can DCs). She does, and it looks super wobbly and cool. But now all of the sudden I can hear a heartbeat sound coming from the walls. I don't worry about it and remind myself that I'm in control. I take F upstairs and we sit on a strange chair in an 8-like living room. We talk again for a bit, more serious this time than joyous. I ask her what I should get her for christmas. She says the earrings I got her were good but I should "double down"? We talk about a few other things which I've forgotten now, and for some reason when we're talking she keeps switching sides and talking at my back; it's sort of like we're in back-to-back seats in a round booth, and I keep turning one way and she'll turn the other. The heartbeat is mostly faded but I woke anyway.

Lucid #75: This one was a DEILD. I "came to" standing over a bed in a dark attic room. There was another snakelike monster in the bed, this time smaller like a large-dog-sized roly poly I guess. Since I was instantly lucid I had no fear and came at the thing face first to watch it shrink away. It shrunk in size and kept backing up and I put my hand on it and transformed it into D, but a smaller version. Then I told D to follow me (he was grey in this version since he originated as a snake monster). I was trying to find F but couldn't. Something happened for a while in this one but I lost it.

Lucid #76: This one started as a DEILD but I guess I lost lucidity during the transition and it became a dream where I was being informed by detectives that my teenage daughter was murdered. They took me to the spot where she was murdered (the outside of my apartment where I walk my dog) and I became lucid. I forgot all about the plot and was just energized by the actions of my previous dreams where I talked to F, especially when I asked about the Christmas present -- it was just really exciting that I spontaneously did something like that. This is important for two reasons I can think of: I woke with an enormous sense of elation/gratitude, and also I remembered not only WL memories within this dream, but also dream memories from a previous dream! Anyway because of all of this I started running victoriously towards these humongous trees (they were more like tree-bark vines reaching up maybe 20 stories, like a skyscraper). I was so happy that when I felt the moisture on some of the leaves I thought of rain, and it started raining! It felt so real, it was amazing. At first I was lifting myself with my arms only, but then I thought about it and started using my legs too. I looked down and up at the huge expanse of the trees and the rain and it was just an exhilarating experience.

Lucid #77: Semi-DEILD. It wasn't instant but I did definitely "slip back" in a way. I tried to materialize something and eventually I got up very sloppily (my control was off due to awareness of WL body in a weird position). I walked to the bathroom and it reminded me of the opening scene of the 6th or 7th HP book with Harry's vision of Nagini biting the man in the room. There were two guys with country accents talking here. Woke up.

Lucid fragments: heard music at one point; felt grief? maybe there was at one point an older man giving me advice; possibly during #75 I turned a small square section of either a being (snake being) or a piece of wood (bedpost?) into a flashlight.

3x1 + 2x.5 +
10 (first LD) + 5 (DILD) + 2 (WBTB) + 4x5 (other LDs) +
15 (personal goal*)
= +56 => 99.5

Running total: 99.5

* Change the weather to make it rain while already lucid

12-11

Dream: Old-school hand drawn room (reminded me of Angel's Egg for some reason) which I was placed in, covered in spiderwebs, with a large door and a square section cut out of the floor which would rotate and change, but for now looked like the rest of the room. This part of it was like the first dungeon in Minish Cap. I go through the door and there's a beautiful garden terrace where a woman in her early thirties, dressed in a green dress and covered in plant outfitting, wants to be my wife. I take her hand and walk her around the terrace, then return through the door to the spider room and discuss the prospect of marrying the spider queen. I wake up before deciding.

Dream: At a large house with daylight pouring in, I've spent the summer there and am showing someone how to use a lathe to make a particular shape in a piece of wood. Transition and a young Jodie Foster (younger than Silence of the Lambs) is now there in my stead. The owner, who is older and a bit menacing, is walking her around. The owner suddenly changes into James McAvoy from the movie Split. He's subtly (or not so subtly) suggesting that he can get away with anything here and Jodie (who is with the FBI?) says that the FBI can stop "everyone". Suddenly this is all a film and Stanley Kubrik is directing, and he's not happy with the shot. I'm now possessing Jodie, and we're walking back through the house (toward the lathe area). A few doors open on their own, and one chair pulls back from a table and rotates to face us. It's sufficiently scary. In a small fragment/FA later, I have missed calls from Kubrik.

Lucid #72: I do WBTB and try a Choline 350mg capsule. After a bit of MILDing, I decide to SSILD and go to
bed as I usually would. I MILD one last time with "I will recognize the dream state. In my next dream, I will
look at my hands and realize I'm dreaming". I fall asleep and wake briefly and have a few cycles of this, where I catch myself right on the edge. Finally I'm aware enough to ride that and I feel the tunnel vision/pull of the WILD! I'm lying on my side and my whole body is pretty numb, and for some reason I'm worried about moving my waking body since the dream doesn't feel like it's "materialized" enough. So instead of moving my dream body, I sort of will myself backwards and start spinning, and I'm in! I fall/float/fly towards the backboard and can finally start moving my arms, although they're stiff. It's incredibly dark in the room so I have a hard time stabilizing, especially since my tactile and auditory senses are also not very well engaged. I do a finger-palm RC but my coordination is off and it takes a few tries to get my hands in the right position; I finally do it and it works but only helps a little. I decide that I have to get out of the room if I'm going to stabilize and keep this going (since I have spotty luck with lights) so I head to the curtains and try to phase through them, thinking of the incubated dream scene I expect to be on the other side. I think of how it will smell, sound, and look. I feel like I'm going to make it, but somehow I get wrapped up in the curtains and am unable to phase through them (why didn't I just push them aside? ;_ and I wake up. I try to DEILD but don't have much luck latching on to the images; it feels like in all of my DEILD attempts lately, the images are weaker and are sort of spinning away from me. I imagine the feeling/texture of surfaces I see, and imagine my dream arm reaching out and touching them, but it just doesn't work like it has in the past. In any case, the exit on this WILD was probably my most exhilarating yet, even though I didn't get to do much with the lucid.

Dream: I'm with F and my dog (D) at a huge house (our current lodging -- apartment, hotel, vacation home, idk). It's dark and we're walking through it, checking out the rooms and talking. D is by the door so I crouch down and look out the window panes on the door. The stars are beautiful, and then I notice that someone is on our porch in one of our lounge chairs, an older man in a white robe. He's putting down a beer when I notice more people in the neighbor's yard. Then, to the left of me in the kitchen/dining room picture window, I notice three pickup trucks parked in a driveway that I didn't know existed, taking up way too many spots! Three guys are walking into our house carrying baskets and cases full of beer.

Fragment: There's a middle-aged woman in a grey robe or dress who's posing on the carpet as if for a photo shoot, saying suggestive things.

Lost a dream here.

Fragment: F is mad at me for some reason? Long and drawn out dream but it's lost now.

One thing I noticed tonight -- almost everytime I woke, I did an immediate (mental) RC, which is progress! Also my nonlucids were incredibly vivid and interesting, which is another goal I have.

3x1 + 2x.5 + 10(LD) + 5(WILD) + 2 (WBTB) + 2 (RC) = +23 => 38.5

12-9

Two dreams I can't even read now.

Dream #1: In 9 living room, vivid explicit scene with F (very emotional).

Another unreadable; maybe I need to go back to writing on my phone.

Dream #2: In grandparent's house, it's a very different version of the house, but for some reason I think it's accurate. It's much bigger and with many more small alcoves and nooks and crannies. There is a specific microwave & toaster oven that convinces me that it's their house. I felt like as I was walking through it I was exercising non/semi-lucid dream control, which is strange; I definitely wasn't lucid, but I was able to change things at will. This is a trend I've been noticing quite a lot. It also reminded me of a house I'd been to in a dream before (specifically a dream set there where I climbed a gigantic tree in the backyard). Eventually I walk out onto the carport and then turn around, and my late grandma is there. She's bald, so I fashion her a wig shaped like her old haircut. I think we spoke and maybe walked somewhere together. It was comforting to see her.

Another unreadable.

Fragment #1: Outside of a hotel or convention center with highschool friend S. We're taking turns drawing guns. I draw some fusion of an M60 and an AR. I think it became real and I started shooting it around for fun. Then we went inside and it reminded me of my fellowship hall from my childhood church.

Dream #3: There was a long dream before what I start to remember, but I'm in a squarish or octoganal room with a coworker A and a couple of other "attendees"; it felt like we were in either a youth retreat or a reality show like Big Brother -- we were all in a house together for some reason. He was showing me how to do a certain lift (a special kind of squat) and he was in some weird rack that went around all four sides. He unstrapped some supports and rotated 90 degrees as if that was important. There were two or three other people in the room, one looked like a hipsterish girl (yellow shirt, black pants, grey hair? maybe). Quote in my DJ: "Stood in on the [spare] / Can't you see?".

Dream #4: I work at a local taco restaurant serving snowballs. It's nighttime and the restaurant/food truck is open to the air. Someone asks for a stuffed snowcone and I refuse indignantly, serving them a "regular" instead (it's all ice cream). I look out the back window and see some signs that remind me of New Orleans, on which the text doesn't change. I think this is odd, because after all the text should change since I'm in a dream. Somehow I did not get lucid from this thought. Thank you, thank you. I'll be here all week.

4x1 + 1x.5 = +4.5 => 13.5

12-10

Sleep schedule is still not back to normal.

Dream #1: Long, vivid nonlucid taking place in a stronghold(?). First scene: with F in the middle of the night on a long, high lookout bridge kind of area. I'm shining a flashlight (or lantern?) over the metal railing and it's brighter in certain parts of the metal; I tell her that this is because there's a higher spirit presence/concentration in the brighter areas. The flashlight illuminates the bars but nothing beyond them, until I think that thought, and pass it over a terrifying withered old woman/hagraven fusion! I try to take the flashlight away but just the image of her is pulling F into some kind of black hole? When F is pulled in I point the flashlight back in full force so that I can go after her; I'm sucked in too, but I think a bit too late.

I'm transported instead into a large open body of water with my comrades at the fortress. There is a raised shore area scattered with leaf litter, but the floor of the body of water is made up of vivid multicolored mosaic sections of mud/stone. Looking back their shapes are sort of organic, and the entire picture together kind of looks like a political map (color scheme, borders) however that didn't occur to me at the time. I get the feeling that the entire area is covered by a very tall natural structure (cave or high canopy), as there's a bright opening far ahead where sunlight peeks through. Scattered throughout the pool, embedded in the multicolored segments, are red skulls and ribcages. Some of the skulls are only peeking out enough to look like masks.

Beside me, one of my older female comrades (a leader?) is consoling me after I explain the situation. We begin formulating a plan.

Dream #2: FA which was very accurate, but I still had my mints on the nightstand while in WL I had accidentally knocked them off last night.

2x1 = +2 => 15.5

As usual, I seem to have become aware that I’m dreaming without being able to remember how it happened. I’m in a house along with two other people. I believe that they’re other dreamers—not sure now on what basis.

In one part early on, I’m looking at a still scene in front of me, like a picture. It takes me a couple minutes to puzzle out what’s happening in it. A young man is shown looking into a body of water like a lake. The sky is colorful and full of varied light, with a couple odd-shaped clouds in the foreground. I figure out that the cloud that looks like a unicorn’s head is going towards the cloud shaped like a dragon’s, which represents an attack on the sun by the moon, and the man is watching it through the reflections in the water.

When I’ve realized this, the scene comes to life in front of me. The clouds converge, and the sky darkens, with the moon appearing. It behaves strangely at first before taking up a normal course in the sky. The man gets up and heads in the direction it has gone. He’s going to try to fix the situation.

A lot of the dream faded from memory when I woke up, but in the subsequent parts, I was with the two dreamers. I only remember one person well, a guy. He is apparently already familiar with this legend—I get the impression he knows a lot of them.

At some point quite a bit later on, the others are somewhere else, fighting a monster of some kind. I guess some people don’t feel like they’ve really accomplished something unless there’s an epic boss battle at the end—but I just don’t find those things very interesting. While that’s going on, I’m standing near a grove of palm trees, above which the moon is floating in the form of a little, glowing crescent shape. Once we get ahold of that, we’ve won. According to the man, however, there’s something odd about the palm leaves, and a person will die if they touch them. But they just look like normal palm leaves to me, and so I figure I’ll take my chances with them. Anyway, I can fly in from above and avoid the leaves that way.

First step: make wings. I’ve been using shortcuts so much lately I figure that this time, I’ll do the full procedure like I used to. I stand facing my shadow on the ground, and will it to grow wings. Immediately, I see them unfolding, and unfolding further, out to their usual considerable span.

But this time—perhaps in response to my wanting to get a better view of what happens when I do this—there are also reflective surfaces nearby, although I can’t say now just what they were. I can see the wings themselves reflected in them—and since I’ve never set an intention for anything beyond generic wings, it’s a bit of a surprise to see how they’re turning out—red-gold in color, and faintly glowing. I climb up onto a nearby object—again, I can’t remember specifically what it was—and from there, hover over to the trees and grab the crescent moon.

In the process, though, I brush the tips of a couple palm leaves. And, perhaps because of that— or perhaps not— I soon find the dream fading around me until I’m in complete darkness. I’m still lucid, though. It feels as if I’m moving forward, but with nothing visible except for occasional faint shapes in the darkness, it’s impossible to tell—or, for that matter, tell how much time is passing. But after a while, I feel like it’s a good time to go back. I open my eyes, intending to be in the previous setting.

And I’m there, as before, and so are the two people. I can remember even less of this later part than I can the previous one—although I can recall the second person definitely being female in this one, whereas I can remember nothing at all about them from the first. There’s a series of events involving a deep pit filled with boiling water that opened up in the house. At some later part, the others seem to have lost lucidity. They're acting somewhat zombie-like, and are unresponsive to my efforts to get their attention. Not long after that, I wake up.

8.12.18

Well I got lucid again. The dream was very vivid, and the feeling of it was very "real", just like I want it. Since I started up my lucid dreamning training agin (abut a month ish ago) I have had about 10 lucid dreams. Which I think is pretty decent, since 4 years ago when I was practicing lucid dreaming, I barely got lucid, and had a hard time stabilizing and controlling the dream. I guess I have come pretty far (compared to then). I feel like I get lucid a decent amount, so it's been easier for me to work with the stuff I wanted to. For an example one of my "lifetime goals" was just to do some physical training in a dream, and experiment with this. I already have been able to fulfill that goal lolz so that's nice. I will def come back to the physical training in dream, when my dream control, stability and lucid frequency (haha the amount I get lucid) gets better. Only a matter of time I guess?
Well this lucid was the random dild I dislike. Normally I don't like these since the induction technique I feel is just like rolling dice. Either you are lucky or you aren't... well tonight I got lucky lol. And it felt good. It actually felt like this technique can have some consistency to it.
Dream: I ant totally remember the dream, since I feel like I used up all my memory on remembering all the details of the lucid part, and trying to deild back into the lucid dream after I woke up... well I def remember I got lucid.
Me and 2 friends from my climbing gym just got of a train, and onto the train station. I don't remember the city we were in. But I remember it definitely was not Scandinavia or Asia lol. We walked over a 2 laned road, and as we were walking a car came speeding by. We started running instead of walking, and barely made it across the road. While taking the last step across the road, I got very aware of everything. It was like everything kinda slowed down, and I had time to think and feel my body and surroundings. (I often do this in waking life to RC. I mean the focus and feeling part). While feeling my body I noticed how I jumped over the curb and gently landed on the soles of my feet on the sidewalk. I could feel the impact on my soles, and it felt "real". I Odis the nose plug RC and damn... i was dreaming! I looked in front of me, and my friend was standing there, all happy since we made it across the road without being run over lol. (I have always had problems with summoning stuff. People, items and surroundings, I have always had trouble controlling). It's always been a goal to summon/say hi to a friends in my dreams. But I have never been able to summon them, or go to a place where they were... so this time, I was aware of my past failings, and wanted to try something new, which I had tried once before in a dream. I asked my friend in the dream, if he knew where my other friend were. He looked around and pointed to a house nearby, and told me my friend was in there. He lead the way. We walked into this old house, and went up a flight of stairs and into a room upstairs. And sure enough my friend was there lol! We talked about training, as we always do lol. And my friends answers were pretty fking profound lol. I got exited about or conversation lol, and woke up!
I didn't move as I woke up, since I wanted to deild back into the dream and continue the dream where it left off. I tried for some time, but I was too exited to fall back asleep.... dang. I def need to hear what these dream characters have to say haha.

Well the way I got lucid wasn't as rng as it used to. Normally something strange happens, or dream characters talk about dreams, before I question my awareness. But this time I questioned my awareness just by myself. This is a step in the right direction I think. And a step towards making dilds more consistent and on MY terms.

Nice! If you can't so the dream control (summoning friends or whatever) just let the dream characters so the work for you lol.

Date of Dream: TUE 4 DEC - 2018



Dream No. 497 - Separated Sections

Dream 497 A - Muddy Nature Strip
I don’t remember much about this dream. From where I do remember, it was raining really badly and I was walking down Jacksons road. My other grandmother was there and was giving me some funny look but I forgot what she said to me. I eventually stepped into this really muddy puddle and almost felt like I was going to sink. That’s all I can remember for this dream.

Dream 497 B - Only One Car Works
I can’t remember what happened at the start of the dream. From where I can remember, I was being driven by my grandma to this unknown place. She dropped me off and for the rest of the dream, I was on my own. I found myself to be at the shopping centre which was connected to my fortress building. Later on, I was going to be driving somewhere with 18-Volt. At the moment, I only had my grandma’s car available to me and so I was worried because I didn’t know how to drive hers. Also, there were premonitions that Lulu (from WarioWare Gold) was going to come along as well; I was hoping this wasn’t the case because she would be absolutely annoying.

I get into my grandma’s car and take it for a test run on the road in front of the shopping centre multilevel car-park. I found my driving to be extremely bad and I was swerving everywhere. As I drove further, control of the car got worse and worse and I ended up driving into the gutter. I thought to myself, “I’d better stop before I have a crash”. When I got back into the initial area in front of the car-park, I discovered my mum’s car to be sitting there and so I thought to myself “thank God”.

Back into the shopping centre I went and I noticed I was holding some sort of light metal megaphone in my hand. I spoke into megaphone and said “Could 18-Volt please make his way up the escalators to level 3?” and then I repeated that announcement a second time so that it was loud and clear. When I went over to the escalators myself though, I gained a shock as I realised they had stopped working and so I was wondering how 18-Volt was going to get up here. I then decided to wander around and check out all the cafes that were on this level.

I was then back at the car-park entrance of level 3 and the escalators were working again. My attention was directed to see 18-Volt in his WarioWare Gold appearance, completely cartoony this time, being moved up the travelator. We greeted each other with a brief hug and then we walked out into the car-park. I was telling 18-Volt about the good cafes in the shopping centre and that one I would highly recommend is the one called “Logan’s”. In one area of the car-park, there was a display of all the menus of the food places. I wanted to show 18-Volt one of the menus but then it wasn’t there. There was then some writing that said, “Secret Invisible Menus” and that flipped over into 2 new menus. The best cafe and a really awesome juice bar!

We then walked out of the car-park and into the interchange area where my mum’s car was parked. The dream then showed from the outside, me sitting in the driver’s seat and 18-Volt sitting next to me in the passengers seat. I was relieved that Lulu wasn’t with us. That’s all I can remember about this dream.

Dream 497 C - Booming On Wattpad
I don’t remember much about this dream. The only thing I can remember is that I was looking at the statistics on my WattPad account and my Warioware story apparently had 174 reads on it. That’s all I can remember.



Dream 497 A
Dream Guide: None
Lucid?: No

Dream 497 B
Dream Guide: 18-Volt
Lucid?: No

Dream 497 C
Dream Guide: None
Lucid?: No

DATE: SUN 2 DEC - 2018



Dream No. 495 - The Kids That Lost A Shoe

I don’t remember how the dream started. From where I do remember, I was at some playground with stranger parents and stranger kids. I especially remember there being two small Asian kids there; one boy and one girl. They left though and I realised that they had also each left one shoe behind. The dream then converted these kids to Jeffy and Feebee from the SML series, who I now had to look for and chase down to give them their respective shoe back. As I walked off from the playground, I seemed to call out “Jeffy!”, in a tone that very much resembles the SML Rosalina.

The scene then moved to my house where I still had the clear intention to return the shoes to Jeffy and Feebee. As I am in the backyard, I also call out for 18-Volt, hoping that he can help me find them… A response takes place very quickly. I am now in a room that does not seem to exist in real life and in there was 18-Volt in there but he was the size of an ant. He signalled for me to get up onto his back, so I did, but it didn’t feel right being on such a tiny version of him, so I got off him after a short while.

I commanded the dream to make him grow and that’s indeed what happened. He literally sprouted upwards from his small figure as if he was the stalk in “Jack and The Beanstalk”. He still wasn’t big enough though, so I commanded the dream to make him grow again. He did grow but the only problem was that he only grew vertically, not horizontally as well, so now he was absolutely skinny like a stick. I specified that I wanted his leg width and chest expanded and when this happened, he finally looked like the 18-Volt I know and love.

I then approached him as he spread his arms out to give me a hug. After a bit of a cuddle, I then climbed up onto his back and he piggybacked me towards the back of the house. My grandma intercepted us in the laundry room and she was constantly touching 18-Volt. I said to her in Croatian, “Don’t touch him! (nemoj dirat!)” and “Stop! (prestani!)”. She was still laying her dirty mitts all over him and she only stopped when she felt like it.

For the moment, it all felt normal as 18-Volt continued to walk me outside. It’s only after we got further down the backyard that I realise my grandma’s touch had poisoned him. The dream was fading out on me because of this and I ended up waking up.



Dream No. 495
Dream Guide: 18-Volt
Lucid?: No

12-4

Fragment (a): Guy with vape-ish thing that has a rubber cover on mouthpiece, like a new paintbrush. He gives me douche chills. He's explaining something in a condescending way? Darkish wood room?

Dream (i): In a very dark crawlspace/attic/room, sneaking around, don't want to be found. Strong sense of foreboding, remember thinking "oh no" after feeling fear, remembering in-dream that fear/expectation will cause the thing to happen. I don't get close to lucidity though. Strange how I can peripherally recognize things to do/not do in a dream, and realize them, but not realize I'm in a dream. Fell through with companion onto a palette/tub in the corner of the room; window across the way? Transition, outside 8 on dog walking path by poop bag station. Talking to dad about politics/voting? Notable as the first time I've dreamed about this area of 8, which is strange because I've walked the path thrice daily for over a year living here.

Dream (ii): FA-type dream, but in totally distorted version of 8. Has almost the same vibe as (i) (foreboding), but now F is here. She's gotten dressed in her pajamas again and is sitting on the couch, I join her there (third person moment). Notable because in the waking between (i) and (ii), I MILDed that I wanted to return to the dream location of (i), and in a sense they were very close together in a way that I can't quite put my finger on. It's just that "dream understanding" that comes to you.

Fragment (b): Series of in-bed FAs.

Lucid #71: In a house, don't remember the first few moments of the dream, suddenly gain consciousness and push my hands into a wall. Feels cool. When I pull them back out, I have rotten/termite-eaten wood one one of my index fingers. Something looks wrong about my wrist where the (sleeve?) meets my hand -- the overlap is backwards. It looks my hand (which looks totally real) is actually a glove, and the sleeve is my real body? So I pull off my hand like a glove, and underneath there's a foot! It's not mine because it's not hairy and looks feminine, and the toes are painted blue (#00008b looks like a match). I feel it with my hand and then put it against my face to see if it feels real -- it does! I have a hand foot! How strange. I don't know for sure now, but I remember after waking thinking that the senses to my hand felt different -- it didn't feel like I could control a hand and those nerve impulses would be "translated" into foot movements -- it actually felt like controlling another foot in the place of my hand. If that makes sense. But there's no way to verify that now I guess. Anyway, after feeling the foot, I was torn between sitting down and meditating and teleporting to my dream world, and I ended up hesitating and woke up.

Fragment (c): Series of controllable hypnagogic episodes. First, a series of faces that I could move, and who had personalities I could understand. I don't remember the second. I also had one or more dreams after this but lost them.



Notes: Excited about the December Contest!

Sooooooo, last night was pretty wild. I'm still popping B6 every day, and meditating a decent amount (maybe once a day). Well, falling asleep I kept lucidity on my mind, and hoped for the random dild... You know I don't like depending on dilds.... I woke up at 12pm, that's 2 hours after I went to bed. And I was decently awake. I felt like I was getting sick. My throat was sore af, and every time I inhaled and exhaled, my throat would bother me. I tried wilding. And honestly I have always struggled with this induction technique.. well tonight was different!!!! As I was falling back asleep, I kept focusing on the slight bother in my throat. I kept breathing calmly and focused on making awareness and focusing on my breath. The bothersome feeling in my throat was suddenly gone. I couldn't move, and it felt like a blanket in the form of sleep itself was slowly put over my entire body. It felt like SP. So I took the opportunity to transition into a dream!! I "forced" myself to sit up in my bed (it felt almost impossible to do). I RCed, and I was in a dream!!!! I got up and walked towards the door to the entrance hall. My dog was laying i front of the door. He got up as I approached the door. As he walked past me I graced my hand through his fur. He felt just like in waking life lol. I went into the entrance hall, the lights were off. I flipped the switch but the lights didn't turn on. I jumped up to the lightbulb and snapped my fingers to make it light up. It didn't lol. I walked into the next room, and found my brother and his family sleeping. They were also sleeping in two other rooms lol. I felt like I was waking up from the dream. I woke up.

Good dream!!! VERY VIVID!!!! the gravity was a bit off , but all in all it was good. But short. Ohh well I wilded!!!!! I'll try to keep this feeling in my memory, so I might be able to do it once again 👍👍


Later that night I had trouble falling back asleep. But eventually I did fall asleep. I had a VERY VIVID dream. The dream content is irrelevant. But the fact that I was semi lucid is not!!! Well... The entire dream I knew I was dreaming. And a dream character also had realised she was dreaming... I even talked to some dream characters about this dream, and that I had been in this dream for at least 20 minutes. But I was never REALLY lucid. It was a weird feeling.... A feeling of lucidity and forgetfullness at the same time.... I woke up...

Productive night!!!! Good to have a wild, but a bit frustrating to only be semi lucid in the other dream.... Let's make it happen tomorrow night

Non-lucid – Notes – lucid – Interpretation – wake/dream visuals/visions

2018-03-12 There have been many dreams of late, a certain theme have played over in its variety of incarnations. Approaching the water, confronting/releasing the reptiles. This dream showed up about a week following our last gathering. It felt big, as intense symbolically as when I have been guided previously by African Dream root. I didn’t intend to dive into it, but it seems appropriate at this time.

Dream 1: (2018-11-23) A series of events transpire in a complicated building complex with a large body of water, containing dinosaurs in them, which revolve around teaching others to express their needs and confronting children in an armoured “Big Daddy” suit.

I am in a large building complex, it is very bright and modern looking. There is plenty of sunlight pouring through the windows and there is a lot of greenery spread out around in the building. It is as if the building is roughly centred around a large pool in the middle, which is in place both at the ground floor and the basement. At the ground floor this massive square pool is surrounded by spectator seats, as there are multiple shows of “scary” animals taking place. In particular at present there are two megalodons in the waters as well as a larger dinosaur that during the dream ends up killing and consuming the two sharks.

In the beginning of the dream there is a show happening in the central room where the sharks and dino monsters are held. To begin with there is a jovial touristy atmosphere surrounding the show and all the spectator seats are filled. It very much has a Jurassic World kinda feel, which is significant in its theming.

I find myself at the basement looking into the waters through a thick sheating of glass. This is where I observe the massive dinosaur consume the two sharks in the tank. It also slams into the glass, though I am unsure if it displays signs of cracking at this or not. In any case this is where I get the feeling that is common to my dreams “I know how this story plays out”. I know that the massive dinosaur is going to crack the tank, thereby releasing 4 dinosaurs where one is a massive snake, the other is a t-rex, the third is the water-dino itself, while the 4th is unknown (immediately here the theme of the 4th unknown deserves attention as it has been a running theme since the night before our first dream sharing gathering, where I encountered an inner child that I didn’t know all that well amongst 3 others that I knew very well).

As per usual as I am thinking this an alarm goes off and there is a somewhat panicky atmosphere as the building starts being evacuated.

I head out off to a side building. It is on the right hand side of the body of water. This time I am on the upper floor. I am sat on a pathway made of steel and below there is a botanic room, again beautiful and floral. I am preparing a workshop. This workshop is about me making myself available to my clients for whatever they dare express their desires around. This particularly is meant for me to teach others about expressing their desires in a public forum, but with me as an object (something that was a major theme at a spiritual workshop in 2017, which I spoke to MA about). F is there and she says that she is interested in a massage, but nothing sexual.

Then I am in Hornslet, where I grew up. M is there with E on the road from the park, leading up to the council building. For some reason this is still connected to the building complex with the sharks and dinos. I am also there talking to M about what happened between them at the spot, so both while it is happening and after. M tells me how they decided to have sex, despite some of the warnings we had discussed about romantic ideations following transpersonal journeys.

M tells me: “We had a lot of sex and to begin with it was just vaginal penetration. But then I decided to fuck her in the ass, despite the fact that she had told me that she didn’t want to. It was rough on her, but I decided to do it anyway so she would have the experience from a friend. She needed to learn”. Throughout this interaction there is an implicit meaning between us around E’s tendency of leaning too hard on support from the outside, in particular male support, which can lead to her being exploited, which is what M was trying to teach her tough-love style.

There is a brief flash of running into my Cousin on a similar steel pathway on the uppermost floor.

The last full scenario again takes place on the right hand side of the large body of water, somehow in the same place as the last scenario with “expressing desire”, yet also below and somewhat unrelated. Again very bright and a light and pleasant atmosphere.

I am in a “Big Dady” suit from Bio Shock. I have almost won, yet I am caught off-guard by a grenade that slips under a big white statue or cardboard cut-out of a statue. The grenade is thrown by a little girl and the reason it catches me off guard is that I have stepped in a puddle of water and the grenade explodes in a long arc of lightning, nearly killing me. I try to escape by rushing to the stairways, but am electrocuted.

I sit down and feign death until the little girl and her mother appears. They walk down towards me the mother approaching. She leans really close checking my pulse, talking to me, asking me if I am dead or not. She has almost decided that I am death until one of my eye-lashes brush against her cheek and she proclaims “I felt a streak of lash against my cheek” and she discovers my deception. But she is so close and in such a vulnerable position that I manage to throw her off and have her eliminated upstairs.

The small girl that was accompanying her mother knows that upon the death of her mother that she can’t hope to win our contest. I am simply armoured too heavily in my “Big Dady” suit. I walk upstairs and am now confronted by 3 children, 2 boys and the girl. They all know they have lost, but decide to choose their weapons – pillows.

As we engage in a pillow fight and the kids seem drained of hope, I get a bad feeling. I feel bad for them and as such I decide not to fight to kill them.

Dream Ends.

Non-lucid – Notes – lucid – Interpretation – wake/dream visuals/visions