non-lucid

Dream # 1:

I was in a strange building that was a combination of a warehouse and a grocery store. The lighting was very poor, and everything looked very dirty. There were lots of people shopping. I walked along the perimeter of the place, watching all the people. Many of them looked drunk or stoned.

After walking for a while, I encountered a hispanic man near some pallets. He had a silver-colored machete, and I was afraid he was going to hurt me. So I hid behind a stack of pallets. He kept trying to stab me through the stack, but the machete wasn't long enough. When he stopped stabbing, I came out from hiding. He couldn't figure out why he couldn't stab me, so he gaveme the machete and walked away.

I was quite pleased with having a machete, and I walked around the building. I kept looking down at it, examining the shiny metal and the blade. I started to wonder if anyone would get upset from me walking around with a weapon, but no one even noticed. I then found a short sword laying on the ground, and I carried it around, too. I continued to walk around for a while, looking down at my weapons, immensely pleased with myself.

At some point, I found a new part of the building. It was made up of long, dark corridors with carpeted floors. As I walked down the first corridor, my weapons vanished. I walked passed people sitting and laying on the ground. They looked like they were passed out, probably from all the booze and drugs. Everyone in this area had unnaturally colored hair, like bright pinks and greens, and they were dressed like they were at a club. At some point, I walked by someone who couldn't find their child, and they were very upset.

As I walked along, I kept going in circles, always returning to the beginning and walking past the same people. I met my sister along the way, and she gave me a giant bottle of pills. It was probably a gallon-sized bottle. The pills were a prescription from my doctor to help me sleep better. There were also giant quarter-sized pills mixed in, which were supposed to make me feel happier. The next time I walked by the people who lost their child, I gave them the pills. Then I woke up.

Dream # 2

I was outside with several students from my college. I only recognized one of them. The rest were strangers. We walked to a baseball field and sat on the bleachers. There was a big white screen set up, and a move began to play. It opened with a gigantic mansion, and then panned through a rich neighborhood. The camera eventually made its way to a grubby, run-down trailer in the middle of the rich neighborhood. Then a pickup truck drove out from behind the trailer, and John Candy was driving. Somehow I knew that the movie was "Uncle Buck" from the opening scene, even though I've never seen the movie IRL.

As we watched, my biology professor sat next to me and watched the movie with us. A girl and her boyfriend who were sitting in front of us started to argue, and eventually the boyfriend left. The professor then told the girl he'd take her on a date to make her feel better. She looked like was going to say "yes," but then she said she didn't know. So the professor started asking all the girls if they wanted to go out, and he even asked me if I was attached to anyone at the moment and nudged me with his elbow. I simply just stared at him in disbelief. I didn't know if it was some kind of joke (because he's known for playing practical jokes on people), or if he was actually serious. I then woke up.

Seems like everytime I'm about to give up, something magical happens and puts me back in my spot. I didn't have lucid dreams, but I had AMAAAAZING recall in the morning. I can remember about 4.5 dreams. But I won't go into too much detail because they might be in some art pieces I'll be doing. I dreamt about being naked on Tinychat, about spooning someone special, sex, something about space, and an amaaaaaaaazing last dream. This last one was filled with gore-filled horror, ghouls, guns, a bloody jungle, a bloody spaceship, and an apocalyptic setting again ;3 I was way too happy when I woke up. I told a friend and he though I was mental because I was happy about such a disgustingly gorey and scary dream.

Dream 1

There is a fete. Myself, my girls and my Dad went. It is now time for us to leave so we all have a walk back to my house. On the way home my Dad stumbles because he is drunk and his lower leg comes off! I see that it is a prosthetic limb which I didn't know he had, anyway I laugh as I pick it up and say to my Dad "do you want this?" he also laughs and says "yes just stick it back on" so I do.
We are now home, I'm getting changed and my Dad walks in on me..he then quickly walks back out and shuts the door and he pretends that didn't just happen. I now go into another room and there is a plastic carrier bag on top of the dresser. I look inside the bag and take out 3 bars of chocolate..they are all sticky and melted, I take out 3 other things but can't remember what. I place all the stuff on the side and go downstairs. My Dad is in the kitchen, I go in to him and he sits down at the table and says "your Mom sent the bag of stuff for you" I think to myself "I bet some of that stuff is for my Brother and Sister but screw them!" ((lol))
The kids are all playing in the garden and my Dad is still pissed up and then I wake up.

Dream 2

I'm in high school, I look in my bag for my time-table to see if I'm in the right class but I realise that I haven't got one. I look at the people in my class and think "I don't recognise these lot". There are 2 other classes next to this one so I peek inside them both but I don't feel like I shoul be in either of these other 2 so I go inside the class that I was first at and decide this one must be the right one.
I have my baby pigeon with me because she hasn't been very well. I have a female teacher and this teacher loves my pigeon, the teacher calls out to one of the pupils and says "ring ((whoever)) and tell her she's ok now!" she then starts cuddling my baby pigeon. I say to the teacher "she's really loving" and the teacher replies "they are very loving birds". The teacher now shows me her necklace, it's made out of her dead pigeons beak and has a red diamond at the top of it, there are also what looked like 2 small teeth on the necklace aswell which hung either side of the beak.

This was first dream I can actually remember that I've had in days, likely due to all the weed brownies. The day leading up to this dream I ate a brownie and a half (I think?) and smoked some in the morning, but then in the evening was only drinking. That's probably why this dream was... the way it is.

Something New [Non-Lucid]

I was watching something, I have a vague feeling of it being South Park. There was also some talk about The Beatles going on, but just in the background somewhere. Whatever I was watching, it grew and took over my entire perspective, and I shifted into third-person. I was panning my view left over a wall, and everything started taking on deep hues of neon red with twists of golds and purples and some other colors to a lesser extent, and the world started flattening and becoming somewhat cartoonish in an ancient hieroglyphics type of way. Patterns were being drawn and morphing around on the wall, and eventually the wall opened up to reveal an enormous panoramic view of some house from the point of view of what appeared to be one of the living room corners. This created a very bizarre feel to the whole scene, it was simultaneously flat and curved. The panning stops when there's a door to another room directly in front of me. A woman walks through the door and the scenery around her starts rapidly shifting and morphing into various patterns in a sort of rapid-fire flow, and her appearance is frequently changing as well, and she occasionally phases through other objects in her surrounding. The background has taken on sort of a salvia-esque spin and the woman seems to be made of some strangely stacked cardboard-cut-out-like building blocks.... It's really hard to describe, but I saw people that looked to be made out of the same material a long time ago when I mixed diphenhydramine with psilocybin mushrooms. The whole environment is becoming incredibly unstable, and suddenly the scene ends.

False Awakening - I'm driving down the service road of a highway in one of my old cars, and I just look around and for a moment think that that bizarre scene was something I was just thinking about, but then I remember how vividly I experienced it and it occurs to me that I must have been dreaming and now I'm awake. I tried typing up the dream, but then became concerned about the fact that I was apparently sleeping while driving.

False Awakening - I wake up again, still in the car. Now I'm getting really concerned that I'm actually driving while asleep but I can't force myself to wake up. I still take time to try to type up my dream in my phone, but the time is really messing with me. It looks really wonky at first and then keeps changing around randomly. Of course, it doesn't tip me off to anything.

False Awakening - This time I woke up in M's apartment, where I actually did spend the night after we finished drinking. Her big dog gets up and climbs on top of me in a really uncomfortable way and won't get off. I'm again trying to reach my phone to log the dream, but am unsuccessful.

False Awakening - Once again, I woke up in M's apartment. She's already awake and tells me that she's late for work, she has to go "feed the whale". I get up too and tell her I need to go soon, so I probably won't be there when she gets back. After that, I woke up for real, and almost completely forgot the actual dream.

Dream Fragment - This one I don't remember much of, but there was a big texting conversation going on between me, Linkzelda, M, M's boyfriend, N, M's previous boyfriend, and C. (Maybe some other people, too?) It's hard to remember now, but I'm pretty sure I saw part of this dream through my own perspective, part through M's perspective, and part in third-person. The only visual I can really remember now was that M's previous boyfriend was at his house wearing one of those cone-shaped birthday hats and there were balloons tied to a chair behind him.

Me, my high school band director, and a middle eastern father were in the middle east somewhere, trying to find the guy's daughter. Apparently, there were these middle eastern guys that owned a shop that sold knock-of brand luggage. At the time, if someone in this country had the same first name as a fruit, they had to be punished. Like it was illegal. Or at least, the guys that owned the shop didn't like it. So the man's daughter was named after a fruit, and so were these twin boys. And one other person I believe. So the shop owners kidnapped them, stuffed them in a huge suitcase, and buried it in the sand behind the shop. They were alive though. So me and the dad and Mr Coulson went to go rescue them. The last thing I remember is sitting on a suitcase with Mr Coulson, trying to decide how we were going to do this exactly.

I stayed up too late last night so my recall is kinda poop. I know I had other dreams. Oh yeah, there was the one where we all went to Scarborough Fair, but it was all wrong. The place had been redone, and didn't look Renaissancey anymore. And Danny was suddenly looking more like Carsten, and beeing all whiney because he didn't understand the concept of a ticket will-call booth. The place morphed into the Dallas World Aquarium, and I got delayed messing with some make-up, and ended up at the end of the aquarium going backwards, while the rest of the family was at the start, going forwards. When we met up at one point, we were all wtf.

That's all I remember.

I was at the park in my town. I walked into the park with intentions of going on the swings. I can remember seeing the two girls that appeared in the park in a fragment a few dreams back.
I just walked around the park, going on the swings. I think that some of my younger cousins were there and I was playing with them. I remember feeling really happy and good.
Eventually, the park began to morph as the dream went on. I think this took place while I was on the swings. The swingset got very tall, and each time that I swung, I could see a great view of the town in the distance.
Also, the park now had a small creek in a shallow valley. There were two paths running parallel to the creek. One right down by it, and another above the valley. Between them was a grassy slope covered in gigantic trees. I started walking down the path when I noticed a large creature that seemed to be attacking a group of people.
The predator was a very large creature. I can remember it having brown fur with black paws. It's face looked sort of like a tiger's or a bears, and It had huge claws, a very long tail, and a thin body. I can also remember it's thick, strong legs.
I climbed one of the large trees. Despite lacking handholds they were very easy to climb. I also remember the vividness of the tree while I was in it.
For a moment, I just stared into the canopy of leaves. The tree had to be several stories tall, and was, I believe a willow.
I the monster saw me, and I got down out of the tree. I started to run, and went though a crowd of people. I figured while the monster was attacking those people, I could escape, but the predator ran though the crowd and came for me.
I would not classify this as a nightmare because for some reason I was not scared.
One bite and I was dead. I did not wake up. The monster turned out to be some kind of video game where you were a monster that ran around killing people and the more people you killed, the more you could upgrade yourself to be a stronger monster, and your ultimate goal was to eat everyone on planet earth.
The dream was explaining to me that eventually the police and military would attempt to capture/kill me. This part of the game was the most difficult.
I can remember being put in control of the monster. I vaguely remember rampaging around killing people but woke up soon after.[

I am beginning to pick up on some of my dream signs. One of the possible ones is probably being in a forest/park setting. I'm not sure.

Normal Dream
Lucid Dream

Night 35

I had a pretty lengthy LD this morning, some parts I can not remember, but I remember most of it.

I. I was at my grandfathers house doing something, and I went to leave, when I walked out the door there were like 10 dogs on his deck. Strange, but I remember going and playing with some of them. I woke up and tried to DEILD. It worked and I was back in the dream in my grandfathers house, but there were other people there that I did not recognize, I was not lucid instantly, but I was thinking about dreaming and next thing I know I was doing a RC and it worked. I remember I tried to float, it kinda worked for a little and I fell back down. I was wearing a sweatshirt, so I took it off and the people where saying things to me, I do not remember exactly what though. So I walked out the front door and to the end of the driveway where there was this tree, I remember the dream was close to fading, and I fell down to my knees and started touching the ground while telling the dream to stabilize, it worked. I almost fell back into a ND when I started walking down the street, I was like "wait, is this an actual dream?" and I did another RC, and it worked again. There was no one around, so I thought I would try to summon once again, I tried the methods that I read about and still I could not get it to work. I remember I was trying as I walked down to a store down the road, and I was like "Alright, this is ridiculous, I am going to get this to work." as I yelled really loud to summon. I said to summon one of the reoccurring DC's in my nightmares, I wanted to confront him. After doing this the dream got really black, it was not fading it was just getting really dark, and a deep voice started talking to me. I knew this was a dream, but I was actually getting scared. I was pleading telling the dream to stop getting dark, it worked, but the voice was angry at me. He started to say things like this, "That does it, you have gone to far this time! Do you really believe you can just do anything you want in here? It does not work that way!". I was asking him what I did wrong and other things, but I wish I remembers all of his replies. I remember just agreeing with him, and then he calmed down and he started telling to do things, and I remember doing them. The dream turned into a hotel room with two beds, and it had a blue suit case in between both of them. The voice was telling me to jump to the suitcase onto the other bed, I was trying but the ceiling was not high enough, so I put my hands on the ceiling and pushed it up higher. This is where the dream ends, it was turning into a FLD at the end there I am sure, I was just doing what the voice told me to do.

1) Me and a group of friends are sent to a beach where we have to perform a mission. When we get to the city everyone there is being checked and we get through there with no problem. Then all of us were on the beach in the evening and our guide told us that the first thing would come naturally when we got there. We pulled out this ring and it started glowing and we realized we had to get to this city across the ocean on an island. One of the girls with me was one that is in a lot of my dreams. I've been watching prison break a lot and just finished the series and this relates to it because in PB they get ordered to do missions a lot.

2) At school and we had a substitute. The sub gave us all vocabulary words to right the definitions down. There was other stuff to do on the sheet which I didn't want to do so I just tried to sleep. That didn't work and then for some reason I was pulling down my pants and looking at my underwear. Nobody cared but the teacher was gone so I hurried and put them back on right before she got in there.

3) Me talking to a kid I don't know well thats in 8th grade. We were talking about basketball.

The dream starts off I am in my school church and we are doing our Easter Passion play like we do every year and I am Judas like I was the last time I was in it. After we finished it the first time I was brought to another point of time where we were doing the play for the second time, except this time the church looked nothing like it did before and my religion teacher looks nothing like himself. He didnt even look like a human; there was something about his head being shaped like a balloon. It was much larger than it was the first time with big columns coming down from the ceiling. Instead of acting out the play me and someone else are sitting down listening to someone talk from the front of the church. Me and this person I am sitting next to strike up a conversation, for some reason I saw "Penis" entirely too loud and the entire congregation turns around and my old football coach says some rude remark. At this point I am feeling really embarrassed and I walk out of the church and I go into a side door of the church. From the side door I enter my truck and I immediately drive up to my house. One of the strange things was that my house didn't have any steps. I just drove my truck as close to the door as I could and stepped from my truck to my house door. (I have a very lifted truck and my house is on a brick base so my front door is high up without steps) When I enter my home I notice that my mom, a girl that I am antiquated with, and 2 or 3 other indistinguishable people. The girl was staring at my from the outside of the door. I notice my sister inside the house, but she looks nothing like my sister. She was also way too young to be my sister, i have no younger sisters than me, but somehow in my mind I knew it was my sister. Suddenly my sister and I break out into a Katana sword fight. I throw my sword into some sort of portal that looked like a poster on the wall and my sword disappears. I pull another sword out of no where and I walk up to my sister use one hand to grab her shoulder and the other to drive the sword into her chest.

I've always been interested in dreaming, but this is the dream that got me motivated to learn more about it and ultimately led me to discover lucid dreaming. This is also the first dream that K, my only re-occurring non waking life DC, made his first appearance. I'm going to copy paste the dream as I wrote it out and sent to my bff that morning when I woke up. I'm not going to change much, just take out the names and maybe add a couple of notes in italics that I think are relevant or interesting to note. There are also notes I wrote to her in () throughout the dream. The dream is written to her, so there's lots of "you know"s and such, so I apologize in advanced for how hard it will be to read. Still I am afraid of rewriting it and ruining the authenticity of it, as when I recall it in my mind these days I'd usually slightly different from this recount I wrote to her.

The first point I can remember I was playing Mini golf with my dad. (This is something we used to do when I was really little and we'd go to the beach, surprising that it came up in a dream this late in life, lol) So I'm trying to get the ball through a windmill hole. You know the type with the windmill that moves and knocks your ball away from the tunnel to the hole. And my ball is yellow, and as I try to punt it through, it goes JUST inside the windmill and stops and starts rolling backwards b/c it's a slight hill. As it's slowly moving backwards, a blue ball flies by me and hits my ball knocking my ball back into the windmill and the two balls get stuck inside the windmill. I turn around to see whos ball it was b/c I didn't recognize it as my dads, and there's this guy standing there with a smug look on his face and a hat on his head with like crazy fluffy hair. (by crazy fluffy, I meant frizzy... like he had curly hair and had straightened it with a straightening iron... it was straight, but wanted to poof out at the bottoms)And in my dream, I've got memories of the guy so I "know" him. In my dream I remember a bunch of stuff all at once, half the memories are really sweet (like hugging me to make me feel better, and even sleeping next to him) but the other half are pretty arrogant (like he acts like he's better than me whenever he ends up showing that he cares b/c he doesn't want to let on or is embarrassed about it. Not really sure how to explain that so I hope that made sense!) Anyways, I get all huffy b/c he knocked my ball and got it stuck, and I'm all "What are you going here?" and he gets all smug and arrogant and says, "You didn't think you would actually make it in the hole did you? I just saved you the trouble of failing over and over again." I glare and then start to stomp off, and my dad asks me who he is, and I tell him he's just a jerk I know, and the guy makes a sarcastic "I'm hurt" type response and then we walk off. Then the dream kind of fast forwards, I know that we finished up minigolf and then went to the mall to check out a new video store or something, but I don't remember any great details, just that I was still hanging with my dad at this point and that the guy was pretty much leaving me alone. Then in the dream I wanted to go to hot topic or something and my dad was looking at music that I don't listen to, so I told him I was going to go look around and to call me when he was ready to leave. I leave, and get about three stores down and the guy from before is siting on a bench a good couple hundred feet away but where he can see that I left the store, and he gets up and falls in step with me like he belongs there, and at this point in the dream I'm feeling really mixed emotions. Part of me is happy he's there b/c I know I care a lot about him, but half of me is wondering why the heck he is walking beside me and not saying anything smug or arrogant. After passing in front of a couple more stores he stop me and tugs me into a jewelry store. I'm like Wtf? "Why are you dragging me in here?" and he gets all defensive and says something like, "I need a woman's opinion and even if your not very girly your the only female I know here so your going to help me. If you wanted a ring, which one would you like?" So I take the opportunity to try and tease him about having a secret girlfriend and he tells me to shut up and pick something or he's leaving. Happy to be spending time with him, and really anxious and nervous over the girlfriend part, I shut my mouth and start looking. I find one that's got a lot of tiny pretty sparkly white stones in it. Like diamond chips or something, you know the kind of ring that's all silver with tiny little stones barely the size of the of the dot on an i covering the whole thing like glitter. Then I tell him that most girls like diamonds so that ones probably a safe bet, and he puts his hand on my head and ruffles my hair and says, "I didn't ask you what most girls would like stupid, I asked you what you would like." And I get all pissed that he called me stupid and tell him that I wouldn't like jewelry store rings b/c they don't make them small enough for my hands and storm off. After storming off I go to the food court to get something to eat to calm my nerves and kill sometime until dads done. I'm vaguely aware of people behind me waiting in line to order, and just as I go to pay for my food the guy steps forwards like he had been the one behind me waiting in line and pays for my food saying something to the effect of, "I have to pay you for your services, even if you weren't very helpful" which gets me some weird looks from the people in line behind us and the guy behind the register. I thank the man behind the counter, and one again walk off angrily and annoyed (thoughts running through my head like "Why would he buy me lunch for something so trivial? Did he just want to buy me lunch? and if he did, why'd he have to be a jerk about it!") (not to mention making me sound like a prostitute, lol)and I sit down the eat. He pulls the chair across from me out and reaches out and starts eating my fries. I snap at him, "Get your own food!" and he's like, "Well I would have if someone hadn't been pmsing and decided to storm off before I could order!" to wich I reply, "Then you shouldn't have followed me" and he says, "I'm not done with you yet." and he starts in on the fact that I didn't show him which ring I would like, and I told him that I showed him one that most girls would like, and he says the girl it's for isn't like most girls anyway and I should just stop complaining and help him out. Then somehow we get on the topic of recent murders, and then my dad shows up and says we have to go. He had just got a call that he needed to go back to work for some emergency meeting. The guy makes a "tche" sort of noise like he's annoyed and tells me I wasn't any help, and then he turns to my dad and says something about how he shouldn't go to the meeting when hes supposed to be spending time with his daughter. And my dad gets all mad and says he has to work to make a living and the guy needs to mind his own business. Then I start to say good bye to the guy, but instead of saying good bye to me, he tells my dad to go bring the car around that he has to talk to me for a moment and that he didn't want to talk about our sex life in front of my dad. My jaw drops and I'm like, "What the hell are you talking about?!" and my dad gets all mad and tells me that he's bringing the car around but that he's really angry and we were going to talk in the car.

Then, when he leaves, the guy grabs my arm and leads me back to my seat at the table and pulls my arm down to make me sit, then he starts saying that the meeting my dad is going to is dangerous b/c theres a demon demanding sacrificial souls or else it will wipe out entire cities to get them. And that the government is having "emergency meetings" in all of it's contracted companies, and that all the people that come are going to be wiped out by a "gas accident" but that it's really the demon stealing their souls and burning down the building covering its tracks. Then he says that he's came here to defeat the Demon, but that he doesn't know if he's going to make it back or not and since I didn't pick my own ring I'd have to be happy with the one he picks for me. I'm like, WHAT?! Demon? are you crazy, and what the hell is this ring thing about? And he's all, "What do you think it's for stupid? I love you, ok? and if I make it back I want to marry you. And if I don't make it back, I wanted you to have something so you don't forget and think I hated you." and then I'm all like if you love me then why do you act like a jerk, and he says he doesn't know, he just feels uncomfortable when he's romantic in public and hes a jerk when he's uncomfortable so thats why, and then walks off. So then I go out to the parking lot where dads in the car and he tells me that he was nice enough to take me in when C (my hubby) and I split but that having C (my son) and C(my daughter) over every other week is rough enough and he doesn't need anymore screaming brats around and that he's not happy to hear his daughter is already sleeping around. To which I try to clear up the misunderstanding and tell him I'm not but that the guy is just a jerk like that who says shit without thinking just to get his way. Then I ask him not to go to the meeting and he says he has to, and I realize that instead of going home we've gone to a school. I ask why we're there, and he tells me to get out and go inside b/c there's some sort of emergency drill and citizens are supposed to go to shelters and that he has a shelter at work. When I try to protest he tells me to just go inside and wait, the drill would be over in a couple of hours. So I go inside, and your there!!! YAY!!! This is where A comes in and saves the day! I'm really confused at this point, so I start asking you about this "drill" and you don't really know much either, so we decide to go into one of the classrooms to watch the news on the classroom tv screens. When we get into the classroom the ground shakes, and we freak thinking it's an earth quake, but then it stops after only a couple seconds. Inside there are people sitting at desks and standing along the walls and sitting on the floor, pretty much packing the place watching the tv. On the Screen there is this huge red and shadowy person as tall as a tree and they're coming up out of a buss and pounding and grabbing at my dads work building tearing the whole place apart. Everyone in the room is silent, and the tv anchor is saying something about how there were people inside the building and that special forces were trying to contain the situation but no one was really sure what was going on so everyone was urged to stay in a designated shelter where they'd be safest. At that point I realize that the guy before hadn't been full of crap, and that there really was a demon and that he really had gone to fight it. So I break down crying, and you get a few people to move out of desks b/c my dad was in that building and you set me down at one of the desks and try to calm me down. You keep saying he'll be fine, they'll get him out of the building, and everything will be ok. And then the tv news anchor starts saying that a group of civilians have appeared on the scene, then the anchor starts freaking out saying that the civilians are shooting some sort of light from their hands and they're not sure whats going on, but it looks like they're trying to help defeat the monster. At that point I tell you what happened at the mall, and tell you about how even though I know the guys a jerk sometimes, I really did love him and he really was sweet when he wasn't uncomfortable or felt like his manliness was compromised. Then a lady walks into the room asking if I'm in there, and I don't recognize her but you wave and tell her I'm there. She comes over and drops a a present on the desk and tells me that some guy had left it in the office a while ago and said that I would be in one of the rooms and to give it to me. The present is wrapped in wrapping paper, but it's pulled up at the top like a bag. I dunno how to explain it other than imagine if you had a large piece of wrapping paper, and you set something in the middle then pulled all the corners and ends of the paper up to make a bag around the object instead of using tape to tape it. So I reach out and start to touch it, but when I touch it I can feel through the thin paper that it's shaped like a jewelry box. and I pull my hand back and gasp. You take the a little folded note off the ribbon that's holing it closed and read it out loud to me since I'm crying and everything is blurry. The note says, "Sorry I couldn't make it back. You know what this is for." When you finish I am crying so hard that I feel like I have to get way from the room, so I jump up and run out of the room, into the hall and then out of the school. You follow me, telling me to stop that it's dangerous out there, and I tell you that I have to go see him, that I have to see him one more time. I can't let him die without telling him how I feel as well. And you try to reason with me that obviously he knows how I feel or he wouldn't be so certain in the mall earlier or waste money on something so expensive, but I won't listen and just keep running. The school is in a city, so we're running on a sidewalk in between buildings, and the ground keeps shaking b/c we're only a few blocks from the demon that's trying to tear the building down.

Ok, I promise I'm almost done now, lol. But this is also where it gets weirder. This whole dream is super realistic, in the dream I'm feeling everything. I can still remember the uneven surface of the jewelry box like I really touched it even though it was just a dream. At this point in the dream though, I wake up crying. This is at about 9:45 this morning right? Well I'm still caught up in the emotion of the dream and I really want to go back to sleep to see what happens and to see the guy one more time. So I close my eyes and try to go back to sleep. What happens though, is I get stuck in a half awake half asleep state, but it's unlike any I've ever been in before. I'm sill awake and aware of C(my son) and C(my daughter) and their movements and breathing, but I'm also asleep and back into this uber realistic dream. It's like being two people at the same time, only I can feel both the things happening in my dream and my covers on my body in real life, but I can't move my body at all in real life. It's like I'm paralyzed. It really was amazing but scary at the same time b/c I couldn't move!!!

So the dream continues, and we end up at the scene of the battle. There are two girls, and three guys (including THE guy) fighting this demon. Just as we arrive at the scene, THE guy bursts into this beautiful bright white light that completely engulfs the demon and him and it's like an explosion, loud sound and shock wave and everything. We fall to the ground b/c it's shaking and then when everything clears and settles the guy is standing there in the middle of the street were he had just destroyed this demon thing, and he's bleeding from deep cuts along his arms chest and back and he's got no shirt on and his jeans are ripped half up the legs and he has all sorts of dirt and black smudges on him and I rush forwards to him. He look at me, and blinks a couple of times like he's confused, then he's all, "What the hell are you doing here stupid? Your supposed to be safe inside a shelter!" Then he falls to his knees, and I drop to mine and catch him before he can fall face first onto the ground. He reaches around and hugs me (keep in mind I'm still experiencing this half and half state where not only am I feeling this but also my real body wrapped in covers and unable to move) and I'm crying and telling him that I had gotten the gift and that I just couldn't let him die without seeing him again and telling him how I really felt. and he says something about the stupid office lady not supposed to give it to me until nightfall so that if he was going to make it he'd be there when I got it to so I wouldn't freak out.

Then C(my daughter) woke up and started kicking me and I lost the dream, but it took about 15-30 seconds (and several kicks) before I was able to move again. (At the time, my daughter was only a year and a half old, and slept in my bed with me) I had a dream a few months ago (maybe 7 or 8?) that was pretty realistic, I couldn't wake up from, and I was "paralyzed" after waking up for a few seconds, but this is the first time I've ever been conscious of both the dream and my real body and being so aware of how trapped I am. I mean it's one thing to know your dreaming and can't wake yourself up, it's totally different when your aware of your dream and your surroundings but unable to wake up or move or anything on your own. I know it seems similar, but it's much scarier when your aware that things are going on around you and you can't react to them b/c your trapped in this dream and your real body is paralyzed!

Obviously now I know a lot more about sleep paralysis and what I experiencing, but if not for this dream I'd still be clueless and might never had learned about lucid dreaming. K remains my biggest motivator for lucid dreaming. I want to ask him, Why is he the only DC I dream about reoccurringly? Is he a normal DC, or is he a guide, or even another dreamer? Why am I always exhausted after I dream of him as if I didn't get any sleep at all? I could probably fill an entire journal entry with my questions, lol. He's been in several dreams, there was 3 weeks in a row when I saw him every single Monday and Thursday until I had my first lucid. Now, I can't seem to find him when I'm lucid. I've called him in lucids before, but all I can produce of him in those dreams is his voice. As crazy as it sounds, the second dream I ever had of him he tried to make me realize I was dreaming, and that was before I even knew anything about lucid dreaming. I'm pretty sure now that I am able to become lucid every once and a while, he's purposely making me search for him. When I hit this dry spell, he's shown back up again, almost like he's reminding me that I have a purpose, and I can't just give up on lucid dreaming just because I hit a snag. As for his personality, well it hasn't changed much. He still acts pretty aloof in my dreams, though over the last year we've gone from getting frustrated with one another to being happy to see one another. Who am I kidding? I'm always happy to see him But in the begging it seemed like we didn't know quite how to act around one another. Now he keeps his distance and acts at times like he's carrying a chip on his shoulder, but still manages to soften up with me. I no longer get annoyed or mad when he's aloof or distant, I sort of understand that's how he is and I don't think now I'd want him to act any other way. Anyways, if anyone's interested in reading more, SOme entries to check out are:

2/16/12 - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views (First Paragraph)

2-20-12 Nap - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views (Part Two)

Catching up the last several days! - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views (2-23, Dream Two)

2-27-12 - Dream Journals - Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views (Dream Two and Notes)

There are more, but I don't feel like looking them up, lol. These are just the ones I knew the dates for. I doubt anyone's actually read this far, but if you did Thank You for your time! And please feel free to comment, especially if you've got similarly important or unusual dream characters. This whole thing was mostly for my own benefit though. I intend to rededicate myself to trying to become lucid. When my recall stopped being great, I stopped reality checking and haven't had a lucid in a month or so. I figure reminding myself why I'm trying to get lucid is the best way to kick start my motivation

04.13.2012

I love you Mother, Eighty-Two (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I thought I didn't remember any dreams, but I remember two vivid ones....one kind of scared me, the other was............I don't know.


Dream 1: I love you, mother

My parents came to my apartment, though that really shouldn't be the case, it seems I still went along with the flow.

The apartment is a little weird in its structure. Instead of having my bedroom at the end of the small hallway, there's one on the right side. There was a fairly bigger bed than the one I have in waking life.

It's covered in white sheets, and I believe the bed head and bed ends were composed of metal. The overall color of the bedroom itself had different shades of blue.

My mother comes in, and I'm half-naked from the top, but I still didn't get a good image of my dream body. I'm standing up and watching something from my Zune, and it seems to be some inappropriate things.

I didn't want my mother to see what I had, so I tried tilting it from her view, and the fact that there was lotion to the right of me on top of a drawer chest made things even more awkward.

She told me,

"Let me see what you're watching.."

"No....." I said with an awkward tone.

I think she smiles and leaves the room. I get out of the bedroom as well after a few seconds had passed.

I see my father is going to sit on a white fold-able chair, and he's most likely waiting for my mother so they can leave. I think I see him doing this while peaking out from the bathroom, but I don't know why I would have to hide and try to peek at him.

My mother eventually comes out somewhere, and I said good-bye to them. I shut the door completely, quickly turning the locks to go about doing what I want to do.

I take one or two steps before stopping completely, and then I had thoughts feeling how my mother would feel sad having to leave so quickly for a few moments with her son.

I started to get depressed a little, and then I realized I should quickly open part of the blinds near the entrance of my apartment, and I see my mother is still in the process of leaving.

Before she does, I tell her,

"Mom? Hey Mom?"

She turns around and looks at me.

I declare, "I love you, Mother."

"I love you too," she declared.

I take my hands away from the blinds, and turn around, feeling even more depressed because I only said that to her to make her feel better, and it still left me speculating if I really love her in waking life.

Dream 2: Eighty-Two

I'm inside a building, probably at my University, and I see my current professor for Biology 112. She's wearing a brown shirt, and probably a long black dress with some high heels.

I talk to her about something, but I forget most of them. As the conversation is coming to a close, she declares something about my grade for the class overall.

She tells me,

"You're going to get an 82 in total."

(Something along those lines)...

I'm a little surprised for an exact value that she's giving me, but I take it into consideration, and said good-bye to her while I'm walking my way to another class most likely.

Dream 3: Where's the Hamster?

It seems I'm in a warehouse, and there were some random things that were so unique, that it's kind of difficult to remember all of them.

The warehouse, if you looked above to see the ceiling, it was pure black, and it was kind of spacious too because you can just hear the sound of air moving in and out, kind of like small echos of air that cover a huge surface area.

I remembering holding a small hamster on my hand, or at least seeing one on top of something. I think I grab it and threw it somewhere randomly. Then I started to get worried, and tried to find it.

Its fur was light brown, and its pupils were pure black, with some light glaring on it.

My perspective shifts to where I'm looking at some kind of mini-map, and it's showing locations of where other small hamsters like the one I threw were. The landmarks on the mini-map where kind of confusing.

I believe one was a white castle with pink roofs??? It showed a picture of the hamsters zooming in and out, and had a little alert sound like you would hear from a radar.

(Not the submarine radars that make the deep and slow sound, kind of like a GPS system).

I know someone else was there with me, but I can't remember exactly who. I believe I saw someone in a red outfit, but that's just pushing it before I start becoming too suggestible with the possibilities.

This time my 'alarm' (my friend texting me) didn't go off so I didn't get to try to WILD last night so I guess I'll try one more time. I did however have regular dreams. They both very short to my knowledge, the first was of my girlfriend proving to me that she didn't cheat on me (I don't have a girlfriend by the way) and the second was of my brother calling me and telling me that my mechanic gave me three hundred and thirty three dollars for being a loyal customer.

Well, I kind of screwed myself over last night as far as recall goes. I got the kids to bed early and all, but then ended up staying up until 2 am playing that Hakuoki game... I played all the way to the end, and couldn't help tearing up because it was so sweet but so sad! Then of course I had to wait for my brain to settle down before I could fall asleep, and my kids woke up early because they had gotten a good 4 hours head start on sleeping. I usually get around 10 hrs of sleep, last night I got maybe 6? I still have a full dream, and some fragments though so here goes

Dream One: I'm flying through the air with someone. I don't know if I was flying in a plane or just like dream flying myself. We're following what we're calling a plane but looks more like a spaceship (of the nasa variety, not the alien variety) The side parts of the space ship fall off (I know they're supposed to, they're like the boosters to help it out of the atmosphere in real life. Anyways, those parts fall off, and they start spiraling out of control like some kind of missiles. Then, the space ship turns and starts heading towards an airport for a landing. Suddenly I'm worried that those boosters are going to hurt someone, so me and the guy (I'm pretty sure the person with me was male all night, but my memory is fuzzy.) make a big lazy circle, then head down towards the airport to warn everyone about the space ships broken boosters. But, before we can get there, the boosters crash into the building and there's a big explosion. We're blown back by the blast, and then we decide to just go home and check on my family since there's nothing we can do now for the people we wanted to warn. When we get home, my grandma is getting ready for some sort of appointment, and she told us we had a family get together to attend. The person with me and myself go to the family get together. I remember there being snowmen decorations there. The next thing I know, I'm playing Hokuoki and I'm choosing the path I completed last night, but instead of getting a happily ever after ending I get a "They never saw each other again" ending. The first part of the dream was easy to remember because flying was awesome, the end of the dream, no so cool and I barely remember. Thank goodness for my notes!

Dream Two: I'm trying to get somewhere, but I have to follow this stone path that is up high in the air, like on top of aqueducts or something. I reach a point where I can see a city, but the bridge in front of me is made of what I can only describe as ghost stones. You can see them, but you can't touch them and I would fall right through if I tried to walk over them. There's someone with me, maybe the same person from the first dream, I don't know because the dreams were both so hazy. Some guy flies around and then lands beside me. He's cocky and stuck up, but he knows how to fix the bridge. He tells me he'll repair it for me, but he wants something in return but I can't remember what it is now. The person with me doesn't think it's worth it and tells me not to accept his offer, that we will figure something else out. I really need to get on the other side though, and I trust this arrogant guy for some reason, and I agree. He flies up into the air, the quickly flies through the ghost stones, and they glow green for a moment then they solidify. I start across the bridge, and wake up.

Dream Three (Fragment): I'm in a cave like place, and there's a cavern that's blocked off by iron bars like a dungeon cell. There's someone inside the cell, and I want to rescue him. In fact, I'm down right desperate to rescue him. He keeps telling me to go back, escape before I'm caught, and he's nearly in tears trying to get me to leave him, but I refuse. That's all I can really remember. I *THINK* I rescued him, but I don't remember how. I'm pretty sure I remember flying with him around the cave at some point, but maybe I'm just getting the first dream mixed up with this one, lol.

1983/82
Non-lucid/partial lucidness Dream
Memorable
Vivid
---------------------------------------------
After my Grandma passed away, I was very disturbed by her leaving this world. One night, I lay in bed and tried to imagine what she might be feeling - how would it feel to be 'dead'. With these thoughts in my mind, I fell asleep. As the dream began, I found myself swimming. It was probably a typical swimming pool. I tried to come up for air and found a see-through barrier preventing me from getting to the surface. I swam left and right to no avail.

The dream shifted. I believe I became conscious. I wondered how would one feel if they were dead? I began shutting down each of my senses. I figured one wouldn't be able to hear and then I could not hear. One would not be able to see and then I could not see anything but black. One would not be able to feel....and this is where it changed again. I felt cut off and isolated. I was floating (seemingly) in this blackness - all alone - without sight, without hearing, without feeling. I did not exist. No one worried about me. I had no worries but I had no joys either. And then...I became terrified. I wanted to mean something to someone. I wanted to be remembered. I wanted to feel and see and hear. I woke up.

*Afterthought: Looking back on this dream, I often wonder if I had not just gone to the void that I found after years of meditating? To a child, the void might seem terrifying especially if you don't know what it is. But when I found the void as an adult, it was peaceful. And because you are meditating and your focus is internal - not external - I don't hear anything, or feel anything, or think anything. I could have, if I'd wanted to. But the goal was to focus and clear the mind - clear them mind of all that is. Only after clearing the mind can one be able to hear other things and see other things. Before that you only hear what is yours to hear. ... your own noise. And if someone/something else was talking to you, you would never hear them above your own chatter. So, as a child, the void, if that is what I entered, was a nightmare. The unknown can be terrifying...

I'm driving in my car in my school's parking lot. There was a lot more to it but I can't remember ><

I'm walking around in an anime convention looking at stuff. This particular convention has shown up in my dreams repeatedly, but I've never been there irl. I don't even know if it's a real con.
I don't remember much except that one of my irl friends was actually being all happy and stuff towards me like she used to be, even though in real life she really doesn't like me ._.